Douglas Ainslie
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Quotes for
Douglas Ainslie (Character)
from The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2011)

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The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2011)
Jean: Are you insane? Avoid all food not from a reputable vendor. It'll be washed in impure water.
Douglas Ainslie: It's just a sandwich.
Jean: Oh, marvelous. Then I'll have ham, cheese, and streptococcus. Or perhaps bacteria, lettuce, and tomato.
Douglas Ainslie: Would you like some of this? I believe it's called aloo ka paratha.
Muriel: No, if I can't pronounce it, I don't want to eat it.

Douglas Ainslie: I invested our, well, my retirement money in our daughter's Internet company. She assured me that as soon as the startup actually, um, started up and the conversion from virtual to actual became sufficiently viable, then she'd be able to pay it all back.
Evelyn: I'm not sure I understand what most of those words mean.
Douglas Ainslie: Well, it turns out neither did she.

Douglas Ainslie: She was upset.
Jean: Oh spare me your explanation. Do you think I'm jealous?
Douglas Ainslie: I don't see why else you would have emabarrassed me... and Evelyn.
Jean: You seem to be doing a perfectly good job of embarrassing yourself. Can you imagine how ghastly it is for everyone to see you mooning around after that simpering, doe-eyed ex-housewife, taking advantage of her loneliness...
Douglas Ainslie: Look. Can you hear yourself? Can you? Do you have any idea what a terrible person you have become? All you give out is this endless negativity, a refusal to see any kind of light and joy, even when it's staring you in the face, and a desperate need to squash any sign of happiness in me or... or... or... anyone else. It's a wonder that I don't fling myself at the first kind word or gesture that comes my way, but I don't, ou... ou... ou... out of some sense of dried-up loyalty and respect, neither of which I ever bloody get in return.
Jean: [long pause] I checked my emails. There's one from Laura.

Evelyn: You're still here.
Douglas Ainslie: I... I missed the plane.
Evelyn: What about Jean?
Douglas Ainslie: She didn't. I had... I had quite an interesting night actually. I... I met the same... um... taxi driver, but this time I let him take me to his brother's hotel, which turned out to be less of a hotel and more of a... more of a brothel really. And... and they gave... they gave me this pipe, said it was apple tobacco but that's not what they called it when I was a student, so... so I made my excuses and left. I needed time to think. This city at night is extraordinary. I think the apple tobacco helped... probably.