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Quotes for
The Khasi of Kalabar (Character)
from Carry On... Up the Khyber (1968)

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Carry On... Up the Khyber (1968)
The Khasi of Kalabar: [unimpressed by the Fakir's performance] Bring on the dancing girls. Get rid of this idiot!
Bungdit Din: Fakir! Off!

The Khasi of Kalabar: May the benevolence of the god Shivoo bring blessings on your house.
Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond: And on yours.
The Khasi of Kalabar: And may his wisdom bring success in all your undertakings.
Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond: And in yours.
The Khasi of Kalabar: And may his radiance light up your life.
Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond: And up yours.

The Khasi of Kalabar: [Lady Ruff Diamond has the photograph] I must take that with me now
Lady Joan Ruff-Diamond: Then take me with it
The Khasi of Kalabar: But what about your husband?
Lady Joan Ruff-Diamond: Oh, we don't want him!
The Khasi of Kalabar: Will he not be displeased that you come away with me?
Lady Joan Ruff-Diamond: Oh, of course
[tearful]
Lady Joan Ruff-Diamond: My poor Sidney will be ever so upset!
The Khasi of Kalabar: Oh, do not worry unduly, before many days he and the others will all be dead
Lady Joan Ruff-Diamond: [happy] Oh well, that's alright then, innit!

[after a servant rings a gong, in the style of the famous Rank Organisation logo]
The Khasi of Kalabar: I do wish you wouldn't keep doing that. Rank stupidity!

[the Khasi's soldiers are fleeing from the kilt-lifted Third Foot and Mouth regiment]
The Khasi of Kalabar: What are you running from? There's nothing to be afraid of
[turns to look at the exposed regiment]
The Khasi of Kalabar: Ooh, I dunno though!

The Khasi of Kalabar: They will die the death of a thousand cuts!
Princess Jelhi: Oh! But that's horrible!
The Khasi of Kalabar: Not at all my little desert flower, the British are used to cuts!