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: Does three of a kind beat a flush? Gordy Howard
: No, Ted. Ted Baxter
: But it does beat two of a kind. Gordy Howard
: Yes. Ted Baxter
: What's a "kind"?
: [Mar's 'happy talk' revamping of the 6 O'Clock News is a disaster, as Ted s trying to be funny, and show he has 'personality'
] And now, speaking for the management of WJM-TV, Mary Richards. And I'm sure after you see her, you'll understand why I say; 'Mary, I don't know what it is your for, or against, but, whatever it is, I'm with you. Mary Richards
] Thank you, Gordy. We'd like to speak out tonight for population control . Between the years 1932 and 1978, the population of the world will have doubled. Ted Baxter
: [Interrupting Mary
] that should do something for our ratings, hey, Mary? Mary Richards
: [Nervously smiling
] population experts agree that if growth continues at this rate, world population will reach 7 billion by the year 2000. Ted Baxter
: [Interrupting Mary, again
] Hey, I think I'll go into the diaper business. Mary Richards
: [Beginning to stutter
] Which points to a disaster of global importance. Ted Baxter
: Oh come on, Mare, don't be such a gloomy Gus. Mary Richards
: The management of WJM feels that television can play a critical role in the control the population growth... Ted Baxter
: [Interrupting Mary
] We sure can. As long as they're watching the old tube, they can't make the population grow, can they? Mary Richards
: Television has a responsibility... Ted Baxter
: Get it, Mare? Mary Richards
: [Turning to Ted, off camera
] Will you shut up, Ted?
[Ted - off-camera - looks at Mary with disbelief. Mary, turns to face the camera. We see her on a monitor - shocked at what she just said. Her mouth open, and eyes wide, she just stares straight ahead
] Lou Grant
: [Lou, who's been drinking while watching the broadcast with Murray
] Murray, did I just hear right? Did I hear Mary tell Ted to shit-up on the air? Murray Slaughter
] Yeah. Lou Grant