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Quotes for
Arnold Perlstein (Character)
from "The Magic School Bus" (1994)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"The Magic School Bus: Gets Lost in Space (#1.1)" (1994)
Arnold: Janet's right. Ms. Frizzle *could* be on Saturn, couldn't she?
Wanda Li: Okay, Arnold, but it's YOUR job to keep your crazy cousin under control!

Dorothy Ann: [as the bus orbits the earth, the class is experiencing zero gravity] We're weightless!
Arnold: We're in trouble!
Janet: No, Arnold, we're in orbit around the earth!

Janet: There's no way I'm going home without my stuff!
Arnold: There's no way I'm going home without you.

Ralphie Tennelli: We're lost in space!
Ralphie Tennelli, Janet, Dorothy Ann, Keesha Franklin, Tim, Carlos Ramon, Arnold, Wanda Li, Phoebe Terese: We're lost in space!

Arnold: *Nobody* is better than Ms. Frizzle.

Ralphie Tennelli: [pretending to speak into the PA system, when he's really hiding behind a box] Attention, all students, we've just learned that scientists have made their first contact with an alien from outer space.
Phoebe Terese: An alien!
Arnold: Wow!
Tim: Ralphie was right.
Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Oh my!
Ralphie Tennelli: [as Liz jumps from Ms. Frizzle's shoulder to reveal Ralphie hiding behind the box] The alien, claiming to be from Pluto, has called to complain about a pile of litter that was recently dumped on his planet.
Phoebe Terese, Arnold, Tim, Janet, Carlos Ramon, Wanda Li: Ralphie!

Janet: [as the bus enters outer space] What's happening?
Ralphie Tennelli, Dorothy Ann, Keesha Franklin, Tim, Carlos Ramon, Arnold, Wanda Li, Phoebe Terese: A field trip!


"The Magic School Bus: All Dried Up (#1.7)" (1994)
Dorothy Ann: I'm tired.
Tim Jamal: I'm hot.
Ralphie Tennelli: I'm hungry.
Arnold Perlstein: [importantly] I'm prepared.

Arnold Perlstein: [reading his field trip survival guide] Field trip tip number 63: In the event of a rapid loss of altitude, you may want to put on a parachute.

Arnold Perlstein: Field trip tip number 158: When the sun is beating down on your head, put on a hat. Got that covered!

Arnold Perlstein: Field trip tip number 107: To avoid being eaten, become inedible. What does that mean?

Arnold Perlstein: Field trip tip number 257: To beat the heat, do like most desert animals: come out only at night.

Arnold Perlstein: Field trip tip number 999: For those without desert adaptations, always travel with a teacher with frizzy red hair.


"The Magic School Bus: For Lunch (#1.2)" (1994)
Wanda Li: [ghostly, as Arnold is about to eat Ralphie's mallowblaster] Arrrnollllllld...
Arnold Perlstein: Huh? I've heard my stomach growl before, but - talk?
Wanda Li: Arrrrrrrnollllllld - are *you* about to eat Ralphie's mallowblasterrrr?
Arnold Perlstein: Uh, no... I-I mean, yes! Eeeee! Wait a second! Who *is* this?
Wanda Li: This is your conscience, Arnold. You know you musn't eat Ralphie's mallowblaster. Besides, you're not even hungry.
Arnold Perlstein: Not hungry? But I could eat a...
Wanda Li: You just *think* you're hungry, but what you *really* are is - thirsty.
Arnold Perlstein: I am?
Wanda Li: Trust me, you are. Now there's a nice bottle of seltzer in Wanda's lunchbag. *That's* what you *really* want.
Arnold Perlstein: [hesitantly reaching for the seltzer] Well - OK, I-I guess. Hey, how come it's OK to drink Wanda's seltzer, but it's *not* OK to eat Ralphie's mallowblaster?
Wanda Li: Because Wanda is a far kinder, more generous human being than Ralphie when it comes to sharing.
Arnold Perlstein: Then how come when *she* has a mallowblaster, she hogs it all to herself?
Wanda Li: Look, I'm your conscience, all right? Just do what I say and drink the seltzer. Now!
Arnold Perlstein: [to Liz] Time me.
[drinks the seltzer]

Arnold Perlstein: One field trip for them, one bag of Cheezie Weezies for me.

Arnold Perlstein: Ah, nothing like Cheezie Weezies with a green olive chaser.

Arnold Perlstein: [to Liz, after burping the bus out, thanks to drinking Wanda's seltzer] Did I break the seltzer chunking record?
[Liz shakes her head]
Arnold Perlstein: I'll never break a record. I'll never win anything. I'll never even get to eat lunch.
Ms. Valerie Frizzle: [appearing back in the classroom with the rest of the class, about to present Arnold's lunch] Did someone say "lunch"?

Wanda Li: [clearing her throat, then presenting Arnold with a sandwich trophy] Congratulations, Arnold.
Arnold Perlstein: Huh?
Wanda Li: You just broke the record for being the best field trip ever!
Arnold Perlstein: Wha - what?
Wanda Li: And giving me the ride of my dreams!
Arnold Perlstein: You mean - *I* was the field trip?
[the rest of the class nods]
Wanda Li: Yep.
Arnold Perlstein: But where exactly did you go?
[his stomach growls]
Arnold Perlstein: You went - inside?
[the rest of the class laughs]


"The Magic School Bus: Inside Ralphie (#1.3)" (1994)
Arnold Perlstein: I think Ralphie shouldn't have stayed home today.

Arnold Perlstein: The trick here is, *not* to make eye contact.
[whistles]

Carlos Ramon: [after Ralphie places the bus next to the partly covered scab on his knee] It's a short cut. Get it, short cut?
Phoebe Terese, Arnold Perlstein, Dorothy Ann, Keesha Franklin: Carlos, yuck!
Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Excellent observation, Carlos. Seatbelts, everyone!

Arnold Perlstein: Is Ralphie staying home from school today, Ms. Frizzle?
Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Yes, I'm afraid so, Arnold.
Wanda Li: [worrying, then shaking Arnold] What're we gonna do, what're we gonna do, what're we gonna do?
Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Why, we're taking school to him, of course! To the bus!