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Quotes for
Andre (Character)
from "The League" (2009/I)

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"The League: Mr. McGibblets (#1.4)" (2009/I)
Andre: What do you mean, there are different levels of friendship?
Taco: Yeah, definitely.
Ruxin: Look, there's the United Nations, then there's the Security Council, okay?
[Motions to the whole group of Pete, Kevin, Taco, Andre and himself]
Ruxin: United Nations...
[points to Pete and Kevin]
Ruxin: Security Council.
[Points to Andre]
Ruxin: GHANA.

Andre: See, I told you Ruxin would wreck the weekend
Pete: Wrecked? The guy took a punch in the face from Antonio Gates, put it up!
Ruxin: Well actually I slapped him and then fell running away, but...
Kevin: Hey, counts!

Claire: [Pete has invited Andre to go with him on a pre-paid couples weekend originally planned for Pete and Meegan's Anniversary] Welcome to the Lark Meadow Hotel and Spa, you checking in?
Pete: Yea, Pete Eckhart.
Claire: Ok, let's see... ahhh, Happy Anniversary Mr. Eckhart.
Pete: Thank you very much.
Claire: Congratulations to you both.
Andre: Oh, thank you.
Claire: Looks like we have a lot of romantic activities planned for you, um starting with a romantic dinner for two in a private dining room, followed by our candlelight couple's massage. Um, how long have you been together?
Andre: Fifteen years.

"The League: The Draft (#1.1)" (2009/I)
Andre: Right after graduation, you guys rolled me my first joint. That's it. I kept it. I got crazy high.
Kevin: Ruxin, you told me you told him!
Ruxin: I never told him, how do you tell someone that? Do you know what is in that joint?
Andre: Weed!
Kevin: No, not weed. Our pubic hair.

"The League: The Bounce Test (#1.2)" (2009/I)
Andre: Where were you at, man?
Taco: I was just having sex with some girl in a Prius. I love having sex in Priuses, 'cause you're not only having sex, you're saving the environment too.

"The League: Sunday at Ruxin's (#1.3)" (2009/I)
Andre: You better be careful m'lady, 'cuz Jack the Ripper's slicing up losers.

"The League: The Von Nowzick Wedding (#5.2)" (2013/I)
Taco: When's Heather getting here?
Andre: Oh, she can't come. She's eight months pregnant so she can't fly.
Taco: Oh man, that was gonna be my wedding gift for you!
Andre: To get my sister pregnant?
Taco: No. I was gonna not have sex with your sister. I was gonna spare you the awkwardness of knowing that we were rubbing wet spots on your special weekend.
Andre: Don't... Please don't say wet spots.
Taco: How did she even get pregnant? She hates it in that hole.