Leonard
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Quotes for
Leonard (Character)
from "Community" (2009)

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"Community: Introduction to Finality (#3.22)" (2012)
Britta Perry: Shut up, Leonard, I know about your crooked wang.
Leonard: No such thing as bad press.

Britta Perry: Today is Abed's first therapy session.
Jeff Winger: His what?
Britta Perry: He's been feeling extra vulnerable lately, having lost Troy to the air conditioning repair school, so he's finally going to let me practice my psych skills on him! Give me some credit, Winger. What's the worst that could happen?
Leonard: Classic tee-up.

Britta Perry: Shut up, Leonard. I know about your crooked wan.
Leonard: No such thing as bad press.


"Community: Modern Warfare (#1.23)" (2010)
Leonard: What it is, Soul Brother!

Jeff Winger: [after waking from an hour-long nap, he wakes up to the school seemingly empty and paint-splattered. He stumbles upon a paint-splattered guy sitting on the ground] What is going on?
Garrett: The-the paintball game was-was s-starting, and the-the dean, the dean announced the-the prize. *The prize!* We-we turned on each other like-like animals!
Jeff Winger: What was the prize?
Garrett: *Was?* This is not over! This is still happening! *Right now!*
[Get's shot by Leonard]
Jeff Winger: Leonard? Leonard! I'm not playing!
Leonard: *Everyone's playing!*


"Community: Physical Education (#1.17)" (2010)
Leonard: You're going to look like an ass in those.
Jeff Winger: Shut up, Leonard. I met your son on Family Day. I know about your gambling problem.
Leonard: Touché.


"Community: For a Few Paintballs More (#2.24)" (2011)
Jeff Winger: Everyone look alive! Leonard, close enough.
[pause]
Jeff Winger: Greendale, it's been a pleasure fighting with you. Some of us won't make it, but there is a place where we will all see each other again, and that place is Denny's.
Leonard: Which Denny's?
Jeff Winger: We'll figure that out later, Leonard.
Leonard: The one near the fifteen exit, I'm banned from there.
Jeff Winger: Then I guess I'll see you in Hell.
Leonard: Let's kick some taint!


"Community: Urban Matrimony and the Sandwich Arts (#3.11)" (2012)
Jeff Winger: My friend Shirley asked me to say something at her wedding.
Leonard: This is the rehearsal.
Jeff Winger: Shut up, Leonard! Those girls who play ping-pong with you are doing it ironically!


"Community: Romantic Expressionism (#1.15)" (2010)
Annie Edison: Hey, guys! Thanks for getting involved in my love life, that was super cool and mature of you! Oh, and since you're both clearly idiots, I should probably let you know that I'm being sarcastic!
[storms out]
Troy: Hey, guys! Thanks for taking ugly Annie out of the palm of my hand and turning her into another hottie that will never get with me!
[storms out]
Leonard: Hey, guys! Thanks for eating all the macaroni!
Jeff Winger: Shut up, Leonard! No one even knows what you're talking about!
[Leonard leaves]
Jeff Winger: ...I did eat all the macaroni. It's messed up that he knows.


"Community: Pillows and Blankets (#3.14)" (2012)
Abed Nadir: The war won't stop with First Blood: Part II. It will escalate to Rambo III. It should really be called Rambo: First Blood, Part III, but the Rambo titles never made sense. And neither does war. Abed Nadir, Facebook status update.
Leonard: Leonard likes this post.