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] Britt Reid
: Let's roll, Kato!
: Kato, we have a secret mission.
: I was born in Shanghai. You know Shanghai? Britt Reid
: I love Japan.
: You are blowing this guy completely out of proportion. Britt Reid
: I will blow this guy in any proportion I want!
: It's not dying that you need be afraid of, it's never having lived in the first place.
: [grabs a gangster, trying to find out who the gang works for
] Who do you work... for...?
: Girls are a drag. I'm so glad we have each other Kato.
: You know what you are. You're a human Swiss army knife. Kato
: I don't know what's that mean? Britt Reid
: It's a little things, and you keep pulling out things, and just when you think there couldn't be any more cool things, a new cool thing comes out, and that's you! You are even dressed like one. You should have a little plus on your chest.
: I'm only thirty six. Britt Reid
: Thirty six? Holy shit, I had no idea. I thought you were 31, tops. I don't even know if I can hire a thirty six year old. We'll have to build a ramp, huh?
: Kato, I want you to take my hand, and I want you to come with me on this adventure. Kato
: I go with you, but I don't want to touch you.
: Everyone knows, when you corner a hornet, you get stung.
: If you ever so much as look at my ass again... Britt Reid
: I can't even see your ass. Lenore Case
: I will sue you for sexual harassment. Do you understand? Britt Reid
: Hugs? Lenore Case
: [slams her door in his face
] Britt Reid
: The Green Hornet. His reliable partner, the Blue Wombat. Kato
: [smacks him
] Britt Reid
: Oh! Oh, man. Okay, how about, um, the Red Hippopotamus? No? Not Red Hippopotamus? Kato
: Hippos are not red. Britt Reid
: I know. Hornets aren't green. Who cares? The, uh, Orange Albatross.
: What did you think of my father? Kato
: He was fine. Britt Reid
: Come on. Just tell me. Kato
: He was my boss. Nobody loves their boss. Britt Reid
: Don't sugarcoat this, Kato. You're not gonna offend me. Just tell me, man to man. Kato
: He was a bit of a dick.
: You like your father now? Britt Reid
: Yes! You see, he wasn't a dick after all. Well, he was a dick, just not really how we thought he was.
: You shot yourself face by mistake. Britt Reid
: How long was I out? What time is it? Kato
: Two o'clock. Britt Reid
: Oh, that's not so bad. Kato
: On Thursday. Britt Reid
: It's Thursday? Are you ki... It's not Monday right now? Kato
: No. I'm sorry. Britt Reid
: Did you put this diaper on me? Well, what did I miss? Kato
: Nothing really. I did some work on the Black Beauties. Britt Reid
[Britt looks in the garage, sees more "Black Beauty" Chrysler Imperials
] Britt Reid
: Holy crap. Kato
: They're backups. Britt Reid
: How the hell did you do this in four days? Kato
: It's been 11 days. Britt Reid
: Whoa, 11 days? What? Are kidding me? I wasn't sleeping, I was in a coma, dick!
: But it's okay now, I fixed the Hornet gas. The gas only lasts one hour. Britt Reid
: Can I see it? Kato
: Okay, but be careful this time. Okay? Britt Reid
: I just want to look at it. Just give it to me for one second...
[shoots the Hornet gas in Kato's face
] Britt Reid
: See you in an hour.
: [Britt is getting back at his father by severing his dead father's statue's head
] Do you it makes me happy to do this, dad?
] Jack Reid
: [on the phone
] Tell the Mayor, I'm insulted. I would never jeopardize the journalistic integrity of this newspaper for some rent-a-mayor's political agenda. Jack Reid
: [to his son
] So Britt, here we are again. Sent home after another schoolyard fight. I know you miss your mother. So do I. But I have to take care of 750 employees, and you have to take care of yourself. Still that seems to be asking too much. Young Britt
: But I was trying to stop some bullies...
: [after yaking off the young Reid's action figure's head
] Do you think it makes me happy to do this? Young Britt
: Yes! Jack Reid
: No, it doesn't!
: [Ch. 2
] Tonight the Green Hornet strikes again!
: [Ch. 3
] Hey, Lowry, the car that ewe just passed a little while ago turned around and is following us. Lowery - a reporter
: [Turning around
] Yeah, so it is. Britt Reid
: You got a gun? Lowery - a reporter
: No, do you? Britt Reid
: Respectable people don't carry guns. Lowery - a reporter
: Well, right now I'd rather be less respectable and have a fast car.
DeLuca, a gangster
: [Ch. 5
] Look here, Hornet, what are you lookin' for - a split? Britt Reid
: The Hornet doesn't take a split - he takes over.
Lenore "Casey" Case
: Oh, by the way, there's a man locked up in your car. Britt Reid
: Locked up? Lenore "Casey" Case
: Yes, will you see that he's released? Britt Reid
: Yes. Kato
: Well, the man in the car that would be Mr... Axford. Britt Reid
: It not only would be, Kato, it is.
: Nobody can walk through solid walls unless he's a spook, but he's done it. Britt Reid
: You think the Hornet is supernatural? Michael Axford
: I wouldn't put it past him, and to think I was face to face with him and me without a gun!
: They're scared stiff. Michael Axford
: I don't blame them. Foranti doesn't use kid gloves. Britt Reid
: Brass knuckles are more his style.
: You're a rotten shot, Michael! Michael Axford
: Ah, 'tis this reconditioned ammunition I'm usin'.
] Britt Reid
: The Green Hornet is gone. He said his job was finished. Leonore Case
: I don't believe he's gone. I believe he's just been too clever for us. And he's probably someplace close right now, laughing at us all for our stupidity. Britt Reid
: Miss Case, you're positively psychic!
] Claudia Bromley
: You know, I have a feeling the Green Hornet isn't as bad as people say he is. He's so polite. Britt Reid
: And tall and handsome... Claudia Bromley
: Oh, much taller than you. There I was, tied up, helpless, about to become another victim of Colony and his gang when out of the darkness came the Green Hornet! I hope he never gets caught, but if he does, I shall defend him for nothing. Britt Reid
: I'm sure he'll be delighted.
] D.A. Frank Scanlon
: That tape certainly isn't admissible as evidence. Britt Reid
: Give me some time, Frank, and I'll have you all the evidence you'll need. The Green Hornet's gonna have a little business conference with Peter Eden.
: You know, if we ever meet up with that masked gung fu man again... I want him. Britt Reid
: You got him.