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: Good God, man. You almost got the Cheese Touch!
: The "Cheese Touch". No body knows when or how, but one day that cheese mysterious appeared on the blacktop. Nobody knew who it belonged to. Nobody touched it. Nobody threw it away. And so there it sat, growing more foul and powerful by the day. Then one day, a kid named Darren Walsh made the biggest mistake of his life.
[kid pokes the cheese
] Cheese Girl
: Darren touched the cheese! Darren Walsh
: No I didn't, I just looked at it. Really. Chirag Gupta
: Darren had the "Cheese Touch". It was worse than nuclear cooties. He became an outcast. The only way to get rid of the Cheese Touch was by passing it on to someone else.
[touches a random girl, screams break out
] Chirag Gupta
: And so began the Cheese Touch Frenzy. Friend turning on friend. Brother turning on sister. Is was madness. Until a German exchange student named Dieter Muller took it away. Cheese Boy
: Dieter has the Cheese Touch! Dieter Muller
: Ze Cheese Touch? Vat is dat? Vat does it mean, ze Cheese Touch? Chirag Gupta
: Sadly for Dieter, that fact was lost in translation. Thankfully he moved back to Dusseldorf and took the Cheese Touch with him. And so the cheese sits, patiently waiting for its next victim.
: Not good!