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Quotes for
Principal Balaban (Character)
from "Modern Family" (2009)

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"Modern Family: Coal Digger (#1.5)" (2009)
Claire Dunphy: So what happened?
Principal Balaban: Well, apparently there was some name-calling and shoving on the playground, but by the time the teachers separated them, Luke was sitting on Manny's chest.
Jay Pritchett: Luke, that's not like you.
Principal Balaban: Wait a minute. You're Luke's father?
Jay Pritchett: Grandfather.
Principal Balaban: So, Manny's father is...
[Looks at Phil, who points to Jay]
Gloria Delgado-Pritchett: Javier. Crazy guy. That's where he gets his fire.
Principal Balaban: Okay. You're...
Claire Dunphy: He's our son.
Jay Pritchett: And my grandson.
Claire Dunphy: I'm his daughter.
Principal Balaban: Okay, so you're...
Manny Delgado: His uncle.
Luke Dunphy: Stop saying that or I'll sit on your chest again!
Claire Dunphy: Wait a second. Is that what this is all about?
Luke Dunphy: He keeps calling me his nephew.
Manny Delgado: You are my nephew!