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Quotes for
Marky (Character)
from "Dead Set" (2008)

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"Dead Set: Episode #1.1" (2008)
Marky: So did they give you a specific instruction or have you been told to just come in here and act weird?
Kelly: I'm not acting. I work here.
Marky: What as? A window cleaner?
[most of the housemates laugh]
Kelly: Something's happening... some sort of outbreak...
Marky: Oh, here we go...
Space: Just let her talk!
Marky: Alright!
Kelly: People get this thing... and...
Grayson: Thing?
Kelly: They wanna kill you and... they change...
Marky: And then their bums fall off?
Space: What'd you mean they "change"?
Kelly: I dunno... they're... dead...
Grayson: Dead?

Grayson: Can I ask you a question? How am I coming across?
Marky: Oh, you big queen!
Grayson: Am I popular?
Kelly: You're the favourite...

Veronica: That's your eviction outfit?
Marky: Well... yeah. No good?
Veronica: Mark, you look like a div.

Marky: Is that your eviction outfit? Oi, Barbara! I said is that your eviction outfit?
Grayson: My name... is Grayson. G, R, A, Y,
Marky: Y, M, C, A!


"Dead Set: Episode #1.5" (2008)
Kelly: There's been enough killing.
Veronica: Well, what d'you propose we do?
Kelly: Cripple him.
Veronica: Cripple him?
Kelly: Yeah, break his ankles, stick a hammer to his feet.
Marky: It would have to be pretty bad to stop him movin'...
Kelly: Yeah, well we'll do it bad enough he won't be going anywhere...
Pippa: I don't like it...
Kelly: Well, it's better than killing him?
Riq: Look, she's right...
Marky: What'd you think, babe?
Veronica: Pretty hard to break an ankle so it don't set back right, innit? You gotta... crack it sideways, inwards...
Kelly: Fine...
Marky: Or we could chop his Achilles tendon in the back of the heel... turns the feet into dead plates, even if he wanted to use 'em, he won't be able to operate the pedal...
Space: Where'd you learn that from, man?
Marky: Saw Jack Bauer do it on the telly.
Veronica: No! S'not real life, is it? No! If we're doin' this, we're smashin' his ankles like in that film... Mystery.

Patrick: Brilliant, thank you very much for the pep-talk,
[to Riq]
Patrick: very nice to meet you... Janice,
[to the housemates]
Patrick: right, we're going, come on, let's go.
Veronica: We never decided!
Patrick: Don't tell me you believe that tit on the boob! Can't even tie a boat for Christ's sake!
Riq: I was fuckin' chased!
Patrick: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you and your reasons!
Veronica: I'm not goin'.
Patrick: Fine! Die here in Cuckoo Land!
[to Marky]
Patrick: How about you?
Veronica: Stay.
Kelly: She's right!
Patrick: Oh, he can speak for himself!
Marky: I'm stayin'.
Patrick: Oh, grow some nuts!
Marky: Well, it's my decision, alright? All for one and that...
Patrick: Oh, right! Who'd you think you are? Love's young dream, here in fuckin' Cutie Cottage?
Marky: We're stayin' here together!
Patrick: Oh, oh, what? She's stolen your heart, has she?
Marky: Somethin' like that.
Patrick: Oh, fuckin' wake up, Mutley! She only wiped her slit up your thigh for the highlights reel, you chimp!
Veronica: No I never, you fuckwit!
Patrick: *You* would fuck a fisherman's dog if there was a Heat cover on it!

Veronica: Soon as any of us turns our backs, he is gonna be tryin' to get out them gates and fuck us all over!
Space: So we keep him tied up...
Veronica: For how long? He says it's bad outside, yeah? And we might be in here for keeps, yeah?
[Riq nods]
Veronica: Well, Looney Tunes isn't gonna stay tied up for keeps, is he? He'll get out somehow... he won't give up 'til he's got them gates opened and then it is game over for all of us!
Marky: Yeah... that's true...
Kelly: What are you trying to suggest? Why don't you just fucking come out and say it?
Veronica: Alright... alright... there ain't much room for debate, Kelly, it's extreme circumstances, innit?


"Dead Set: Episode #1.3" (2008)
Veronica: [Looking at Zombie Angel in the pool] Quite stupid, ain't they?
Space: Not the brightest bunch... can't even get out the side...
Marky: Don't know they're dead...
Joplin: Good old British public...
Kelly: Yeah... you're right... you're all right; they're thick as shit. So as long as we're still breathing, we're smarter than them. And that's why we're gonna beat 'em.
[Kelly shoots the zombie Angel in the head]

Kelly: Oven chips?
Marky: They're essential.
Kelly: So what if there's a power cut? You gonna eat them frozen?
Marky: Eh... if there's a power cut they'll defrost.
Kelly: What, and you'll eat them cold and mushy?
Marky: Wouldn't be the first time...

Marky: No way! No way! Check that out! I'm only on the front cover of Heat! "Rubbish in bed"? What the... "desperate fumble"...? What a loada... they don't half get a loada shit in that magazine, Heat! "Shit in bed"? I'm mint in bed! "Not as funny as he thinks"? I'm well funny!
Kelly: Okay!
Marky: Erm... don't mention that to anybody when we get back to the house...


"Dead Set: Episode #1.2" (2008)
Marky: It's gotta be some terrorist bollocks... they've released some... loony gas...
Space: Loony gas...?
Marky: You got a better explanation?
Joplin: The government or army must have tested something they shouldn't!
Veronica: What, like... GM foods or somink?
Joplin: Maybe... or WiFi... God knows what that does to your molecules!
Veronica: Does this mean we're not on telly anymore?

Marky: There's got to be somewhere we can go.
Kelly: Trust me. Outside... it's a bad idea...


"Dead Set: Episode #1.4" (2008)
Veronica: Why'd they keep comin' towards the house like that?
Marky: I'm glad they do. Easier to pick off.
Veronica: Yeah, but *why*?
Joplin: Some kind of... primitive intuition, maybe? They feel the need to be near us, don't forget, this place used to be like a church to them.
Marky: Maybe... they can just smell bullshit.