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Quotes for
Ted Lawson (Character)
from "Small Wonder" (1985)

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"Small Wonder: Brainwashed (#1.13)" (1985)
Joan Lawson: [When Vicki returns, after been unexpectedly missing for some time] You scared the life out of us! Are you alright, darling?
Vicki the Robot: [In her monotonous robotic tone] I am alright, darling.
Ted Lawson: Vicki, where were you?
Vicki the Robot: [Remembering Harriet's instructions to lie] I was in the backyard or something.
Jamie Lawson: She must have followed me out.
Ted Lawson: What were you doing all this time?
Vicki the Robot: Scaring the life out of you.


"Small Wonder: The Lie (#1.7)" (1985)
Ted Lawson: [after Jamie bounces his basketball in the kitchen] What did I just say about playing in the house?
Jamie Lawson: Sorry, Dad. Bad habits are hard to break.
Ted Lawson: Well, if you don't break that bad habit, before you break something in the house, I am just liable to break something on your rear end.
Vicki the Robot: [In her robotic voice] His rear end gets the message.


"Small Wonder: The Adoption (#1.10)" (1985)
Joan Lawson: I have, a terrible thought. What if, Vicki stays with us, for a long time? When Jamie, starts to grow and she'll remain the same size.
Ted Lawson: No, she won't. Watch, she don't have to be plugged in, for a wired remote.
[Clicks buttons, and Vicki grows tall]
Joan Lawson: Oh! Ted, that's incredible!
Ted Lawson: I can make her, smaller too.
[Clicks buttons, and Vicki shrinks tiny]
Joan Lawson: Oh! Make her normal, please!
Vicki the Robot: [In chipmunk voice] Make me normal, please.
Ted Lawson: Okay, okay.
[clicks buttons, and Vicki grows normal]


"Small Wonder: Sibling Rivalry (#1.5)" (1985)
Jamie Lawson: Vicki, Vicki, Vicki. I might as well be invisible.
Ted Lawson: [bumps into Jamie] Sorry, Jamie, I didn't see you.
Jamie Lawson: I am invisible!


"Small Wonder: It's Okay to Say No (#3.5)" (1987)
Jamie Lawson: Hi!
Ted Lawson: I'll bet you are!


"Small Wonder: Double Wedding (#2.24)" (1987)
Joan Lawson: I can see all of us at the alter. I'll say "I Do", and she'll say "I Do-do-do-do-do-do"!
Ted Lawson: Honey, just forget the Brindles. It's still our wedding. We're going in first, they bring up the rear. After they play "The Wedding March" for us, they play "Send In The Clowns" for them!