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Leigh Anne Touhy
: Michael, I want you to have a good time but if you get a girl pregnant out of wedlock, I will crawl into the car, drive up to Oxford and cut off your penis. S.J. Tuohy
: She means it.
: [Diagramming an American Football play with cylindrical containers from a spice rack on the Dining Room table
] Now, I will be the Running Back... and you show me what you are supposed to do. Ready? Hike. You will block him, he will hit him, and the Quarter Back will hand it off... he gets off... and takes off... open lane to the endzone! All there is to it! Leigh Anne Touhy
: [Walks in... perplexed
] What's going on here? Michael Oher
: Blended Spice just scored...