Bob Bigalow
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Quotes for
Bob Bigalow (Character)
from Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (1999)

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Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (1999)
Bob Bigalow: The idea of a man-whore is a relatively new idea. Cologne?
Deuce Bigalow: No thanks.
Bob Bigalow: [loud fart in background] These women are looking for more than just sex. They want romance.
Deuce Bigalow: What do you mean?
Bob Bigalow: [another loud fart] Well, it was like when I met your mom, God rest her soul. I didn't have so much as a toilet to clean. Still, I wasn't going to pay her a dime for sex, no matter what she was charging.
Deuce Bigalow: What?
Bob Bigalow: [loud fart] Well your mom could've had any man she wanted in that strip club. And this being my first time in Bangkok, I was looking for a good time myself.
Deuce Bigalow: You met my mom where?
Bob Bigalow: It's not important.
Bob Bigalow: The thing is, she saw something in me beyond the 200 baht. A man with an eye for adventure who wasn't afraid to risk it all.
Deuce Bigalow: Dad, are you saying that...
Bob Bigalow: [diarrhea splattering into toilet in background] So we took all her one-dollar bills off the stage, said good-bye to that donkey, and two days later we were man and wife. And we were happily married a long time.
Deuce Bigalow: So, do you think I should be more of a risk-taker?
Bob Bigalow: [toilet flushing] Worked for me.
Deuce Bigalow: Thanks, pops.

Bob Bigalow: Raspberry Bibingka! Ah, you shouldn't have. My wife, God rest her soul, used to make this all the time. You would've liked her. Bangkok Betty. She had the most amazing mouth. It paid for our honeymoon.

Vic: Bob, we have an overflowing toilet in the ladies' bathroom. There is shit everywhere. It's a real mess. You think you could get in there and take care of that for me?
Bob Bigalow: No worries, Vic. Right on it. I'd like you to meet my son's girlfriend, Kate.
Vic: Kate, nice to meet you. Hi Deuce. So could you get in there, Bob? I mean, I got a party of ten coming in, and I am up to my ankles in human crap. It's a real stinkfest back there.