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Quotes for
Sgt. Johnson (Character)
from Halo (2001) (VG)

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Halo 2 (2004) (VG)
Sgt. Johnson: [if you give him a weaker weapon] I thought we were friends!

Sgt. Johnson: [shooting him as Master Chief] Chief, you're supposed to set an example!

Sgt. Johnson: Don't make me take off my belt!

Sgt. Johnson: [giving him a stronger weapon] I can't take this!
Sgt. Johnson: Yes, I can.

Sgt. Johnson: [giving him a stronger weapon] Now that... is some love.

Sgt. Johnson: [shooting him as Master Chief] OW!

Sgt. Johnson: [shooting him as Master Chief] Do I look like an eight-foot blue alien monster?

Sgt. Johnson: [shooting him as Master Chief] Damn, Chief, that really hurt!

Sgt. Johnson: [shooting him as Master Chief] Clean your visor, jackass!

Sgt. Johnson: Now listen up! Back in my day, we didn't have fancy tanks! We had sticks. Two sticks and a rock for the entire platoon! And we had to share the rock! You should consider yourself very lucky marines!

Sgt. Johnson: [if the Master Chief dies] Ha ha, very funny, Chief!
Sgt. Johnson: Uh oh...

Sgt. Johnson: [while he is fighting the covenant] I don't want to kill you, it's just that you're too ugly to let live!

Cortana: You look nice.
Master Chief, Sgt. Johnson: Thank you.
[they look to each other]

Sgt. Johnson: Don't they teach you kids to SWEAR in basic anymore?

Sgt. Johnson: For a brick, he flew pretty good.

Cortana: [Sgt. Johnson delivers a Scorpion tank to Master Chief and Cortana] Thanks for the tank. *He* never gets me anything.
Sgt. Johnson: [mans a machine gun] Oh, I *know* what the ladies like.

Sgt. Johnson: Where's the rest of your platoon?
Marine: Wasted, Sarge.
Marine: Which we will be too, sir! If we don't get the hell out of here!
Sgt. Johnson: You hit, Marine?
Marine: No, sir...
Sgt. Johnson: Then listen up! You had the chance to be afraid before you joined my beloved corps! But to guide you back to the true path, I've brought this motivational device!
[indicates Scorpion Tank]
Sgt. Johnson: Our big green style cannot be defeated!

Marine: Dear Sarge, having a lovely time kicking ass in outer space - wish you were here!
Sgt. Johnson: [over intercom] I heard that, Jackass!

Cortana: The message just repeats: Regret. Regret. Regret.
Miranda Keyes: Catchy. Any idea what it means?
Sgt. Johnson: "Dear humanity, we regret being alien bastards, we regret coming to Earth, and we most definitely regret that the Corps just blew up our raggedy-ass fleet!"
Pilots: [along with Sgt. Johnson] Hoo-ah!

Sgt. Johnson: Please... don't shake the light bulb!

Miranda Keyes: [after the ring is shut down] What's that?
343 Guilty Spark: A beacon.
Miranda Keyes: What's it doing?
343 Guilty Spark: Communicating at superluminous speeds with the frequency of...
Miranda Keyes: Communicating with what?
343 Guilty Spark: The other installations.
Miranda Keyes: Show me.
343 Guilty Spark: Failsafe protocol; in the event of an unexpected shut down, the installation will move to standby status. All installations are now eligible for remote activation.
Miranda Keyes: Remote activation? From here?
343 Guilty Spark: Don't be ridiculous!
Sgt. Johnson: Listen, Tinkerbell, don't make me...
Miranda Keyes: Then where? Where would somebody go to activate the other rings?
343 Guilty Spark: ...Why, the Ark, of course!
Arbiter: And where, Oracle, is that?

Sgt. Johnson: [killing an Elite] Looks like your big freaky mouth bit off more than it could chew!

Sgt. Johnson: [Giving him a weaker weapon] If it were anybody else...

Sgt. Johnson: [when aiming at Sgt. Johnson] I know I'm pretty, but we gotta get to work!

[being congratulated for their work on Halo]
Master Chief: You told me there wouldn't be any cameras.
Sgt. Johnson: And you told me you were gonna wear something nice.

Halo (2001) (VG)
Sgt. Johnson: Well, I don't care if it's God's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine or a giant hula hoop, we're not gonna let 'em have it!

Sgt. Johnson: We are going to blow the hell out of those dumb bugs until we don't have anything left to shoot 'em with! And then, we are going to strangle them with their own-living-guts!

Sgt. Johnson: [to Fire Team Charlie] Once again, it is our job to finish what the flyboys started. We are leaving this ship, platoon, and engaging the Covenant on solid ground. When we meet the enemy, we will rip their skulls from their spines, and toss 'em away, laughin'! Am I right, Marines?

Sgt. Johnson: [after Master Chief dies] Damn it! Get Cortana out of his head!

Sgt. Johnson: [fighting the Covenant] I would have been your daddy, but that dog beat me over the fence.

Pvt. Mendoza: [Jenkins's video feed - Marines are examining a brutally killed elite] ... which is weird right? I mean, look at it, something scrambled the insides.
Sgt. Johnson: Hunh. Plasma scoring?
Pvt. Mendoza: Yeah, I don't know, maybe there was an accident you know, friendly fire?
Captain Keyes: What do we have Sergeant?
Sgt. Johnson: Looks like a Covenant patrol, bad-ass elite unit, all KIA.
Captain Keyes: Real pretty, friend of yours?
Pvt. Mendoza: Nah, we just met.

Sgt. Johnson: [to Fire Team Charlie] Men, here is where we show those split-chin squid-head sons-of-bitches that they could not have picked a worse enemy than the human race! We are going to blow the hell out of those dumb bugs, until we don't have anything left to shoot 'em with! And then we are going to strangle them with their own-living-guts! Am I *right*, Marines?

Sgt. Johnson: Hit it, Marines! Go! Go! Go! The corps ain't payin' us by the hour!

Sgt. Johnson: [when a large number of hostiles appears] MARINES, we are LEAVING!

Sgt. Johnson: [if you kill a lot of enemies] I'm startin' to feel sorry for them.

Captain Keyes: [FPV from Pvt. Jenkins' helmet cam] Right, let's get this door open.
Pvt. Mendoza: I'll try, sir. But it looks like these Covenant tried pretty hard to lock it down.
Captain Keyes: Just do it, son.
Pvt. Mendoza: Yes, sir.
[Mendoza uses a codebreaker and opens the door; he motions to enter the room. Jenkins, Mendoza and Bisenti go in and fan out]
Pvt. Bisenti: I got a bad feeling about this...
Sgt. Johnson: Boy, you always got a bad feeling about something.
Marine: [over radio] Captain? Sarge? Can you hear me?
Captain Keyes: What's going on, soldier?
Marine: [over radio] We got contacts, lots of 'em! But they're not Covenant! They're just tearin' through us! What the... Oh, no!
Sgt. Johnson: Corporal? Do you copy, over? Mendoza, get your ass back up to second squad's position and find out what the hell is going on!
Pvt. Mendoza: But...
Sgt. Johnson: I don't have time for your lip, soldier! I gave you an order!
Pvt. Mendoza: But Sarge, listen!
[ominous crawling and slurping is heard]
Pvt. Bisenti: What is that?
Sgt. Johnson: Where's that comin' from, Mendoza?
Pvt. Mendoza: Everywhere! I don't... There! Mira!
[points as infection form Flood pour out of a door]
Pvt. Bisenti: [an infection form latches onto his face] Gaaah! Get it out! Get it out!
Pvt. Mendoza: Hold still! Hold still!
Sgt. Johnson: Let 'em have it!
[the Marines open fire]
Captain Keyes: Sergeant, we're surrounded!
Sgt. Johnson: Goddammit, Jenkins! Fire your weapon!
Pvt. Jenkins: There are too many, Sarge!
Sgt. Johnson: Don't even think about it, Marine.
Pvt. Mendoza: Aw, this is loco!
[runs away]
Captain Keyes: Get back here, Marine! That's an order!
[Johnson calls out to Jenkins whose cam is blocked by the Flood; video feed ends]

Halo 3 (2007) (VG)
[from trailer]
Sergeant Johnson: Marines, fall back now!
Sergeant Johnson: Any sign of the Chief?
Marine #2: Negative Sarge. I think we lost him.
Master Chief: Not yet.

Sgt. Johnson: We have enough to worry about without you two trying to kill each other.
Arbiter: Were it so easy.

Arbiter: We must go. The Brutes have our scent.
Sgt. Johnson: They must love the smell of Bulgari. Yeah, I'm doing a little product placement. I gotta get paid, too!

Marine: [Master Chief is lying motionless on his back in his own crater, hands still raised as if he were still in combat] His armor's locked up. Gel layer could have taken most of the impact... I don't know, Sergeant Major.
Sgt. Johnson: [kneels over the Chief, looking for signs of life] Radio for VTOL. Heavy lift gear. We're not leaving him here.
Master Chief: [grabs Johnson's arm] Yeah, you're not.
[pulls himself up]

Sgt. Johnson: Crazy fool. Why do you always jump? One of these days you're gonna land on something as stubborn as you are, and I don't do bits and pieces.

Arbiter: We must go. The Brutes have our scent.
Sgt. Johnson: Then they must love the smell of badass.

Halo 3: ODST (2009) (VG)
Dare: Lord Hood may have given you clearance, but it was my op and it's my interrogation. We only captured one; it's very delicate.
Sgt. Johnson: Don't worry. I know what the aliens like.