Lisa DePardo
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Quotes for
Lisa DePardo (Character)
from Labor Pains (2009)

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Labor Pains (2009)
Lisa DePardo: I need you to say 'My Name is Thea and I am NOT pregnant.'

Lisa DePardo: It smells like something died in here.
Thea Clayhill: It did... my soul.

Thea Clayhill: Do you think he'll ever forgive me?
Lisa DePardo: Do you want me to be honest? Or do you want me to make you feel better?

Lisa DePardo: Pregnant. It's brilliant. Where'd you come up with that?
Thea Clayhill: Oh, I saw it on an episode of law and order. Yeah, you can't fire a pregnant women. Discrimination, lawsuits, bad mojo... whatever.
Lisa DePardo: Smart.

Greg: You know, I find it fascinating that Kristin is only a month further along than you, and yet she's the size of a school bus while you're still over here looking like Kate Moss.
Thea Clayhill: Uh, different strokes, I guess.
Greg: Perhaps it's easier to feel the bump than to see it.
[reaches for Thea's stomach, Lisa swats at his hand]
Greg: What's the big deal? Everyone likes to touch a pregnant stomach.
Lisa DePardo: Because you're a gross weirdo, Greg.
Thea Clayhill: And the baby doesn't like gross weirdos, Greg!

Lisa DePardo: If you want people to think you're pregnant, you gotta start talking the talk and walking the... waddle.

Thea Clayhill: I look rediculous. These jeans are elastic on the top. I feel like I'm wearing a condom on my stomach.
Lisa DePardo: Trust me, you don't look like you've been anywhere NEAR a condom.

Lisa DePardo: Ew. Look at those nipples!
[reading a pregnancy book]

Greg: Congratulations, Thea.
Thea Clayhill: Thank you, Greg.
Greg: You really think you can get to the top by playing games, don't cha? I know what you're up to, Thea. And I think that it stinks. It super stinks.
Lisa DePardo: Hm.
Thea Clayhill: Well, really? Do you think that it stinks that I wanna hire you to be my assistant?
Greg: Really?
Thea Clayhill: You'll start first thing Monday after I put the paperwork through.
Greg: Oh wow, Thea. Thea, thank you so much. I- I could kiss you right now.
Thea Clayhill: You don't have to do that.
Greg: I'll see you later, boss.

Thea Clayhill: He's actually kinda cute, though. Don't ya think?
Lisa DePardo: Who?
Thea Clayhill: Um... Nick.
Lisa DePardo: Um... No.