Helen Elgin
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Quotes for
Helen Elgin (Character)
from "The Six Million Dollar Man" (1974)

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"The Six Million Dollar Man: The Bionic Woman (#2.19)" (1975)
Col. Steve Austin: [Steve's mom is stirring something up] Do I still get to lick the bowl?
Helen Elgin: [paying attention to something else] What dear?
Col. Steve Austin: What kind of cake is this?
[tastes a bit with his finger]
Helen Elgin: Eh? Oh!
[tries to stop him]
Col. Steve Austin: Ooh, gah, it's terrible!
Helen Elgin: [laughs] Of course it is, it's wallpaper paste.
Col. Steve Austin: It's not bad for wallpaper paste.
[laughs]

Helen Elgin: [Steve and his stepdad are going for a walk] Now you boys behave yourself, be back by ten.
Col. Steve Austin: [laughs] I figured we'd do a little honky-tonkin'.

Helen Elgin: Did Jim leave yet?
Col. Steve Austin: Oh, yeah, I think so.
Helen Elgin: Oh poop! I wanted him to get a couple of men to helm him lift the refridgerator out so I can clean behind it.
Col. Steve Austin: Oh, I can slide it out for ya.


"The Bionic Woman: Bionic Beauty (#1.7)" (1976)
Brady, Stage Manager: [Helen has been caught using an outside line] Who were you talking to? Oscar who?
Helen Elgin: Oscar Lipschitz, he's an old beau of mine from college, whenever I'm in his area I always call him up, and...

Jaime Sommers: [about to start the swimsuit competition] I feel like a side of beef, how do I look?
Helen Elgin: Terrific.
Jaime Sommers: You know I really liked my old legs better. I think they were better.


"The Six Million Dollar Man: The Bionic Woman: Part 2 (#2.20)" (1975)
Col. Steve Austin: You really like her don't you?
Helen Elgin: Oh, I've like that sweet girl ever since your day in the third grade. Remember, she helped you come home because you got sick from eating all that food?
Col. Steve Austin: Yeah, but I never told you which sweet little girl dared me to eat all that food.

Jim Elgin: Helen, you sure it's legal for the stepfather of the groom to give the bride away?
Helen Elgin: Well, as long as the stepfather of the goom isn't the father of the bride it's legal.


"The Bionic Woman: Jaime's Mother (#1.8)" (1976)
Helen Elgin: Look who just dropped by...
Oscar: Hi.
Jaime: So you called him anyway, huh?
Oscar: I would have been angry with her if she hadn't.

Jaime: Mothers aren't like used cars, you know, you don't just change models on a whim.
Helen Elgin: You mean I'm locked into the job?
Jaime: No, I mean you're stuck with it.


"The Six Million Dollar Man: The Coward (#1.12)" (1974)
Helen Elgin: Are you alright, Steve?
Col. Steve Austin: Oh... sure, I'm fine.
Helen Elgin: Now you know I can always tell when you're fibbing.

Col. Steve Austin: Well, I can't give you much of the details. It concerns an old World War Two aircraft. It was nicknamed 'My Little Girl'.
Helen Elgin: 'My Little Girl', that was you're fathers plane. He used to call me that.


"The Bionic Woman: Welcome Home, Jaime: Part 1 (#1.1)" (1976)
Helen Elgin: [calling up the stairs] Anybody home?
Jaime Sommers: [feeling happily self-satisfied at having landed a job at the school, and also feeling renewed confidence from having survived the first day without too much trouble] Nobody but us teachers!


"The Bionic Woman: Beyond the Call (#2.18)" (1977)
Helen Elgin: Jaime, that child is a one girl wave of destruction.