Kevin Ryan
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Quotes for
Kevin Ryan (Character)
from "Castle" (2009)

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"Castle: Much Ado About Murder (#8.20)" (2016)
Javier Esposito: Ms. Fox? NYPD. We need to ask you a few questions.
[Naomi doesn't reply]
Javier Esposito: Ms. Fox.
Richard Castle: Um, may I? Ophelia.
Naomi Fox: Aye, my lord?
Richard Castle: These fair gentlemen are constables and wish to speak to you in matters regarding the murder most foul and unnatural of Zane Cannon.
Naomi Fox: 'Tis too much to bear to think on it.
Kevin Ryan: [playing along] How now, fair Ophelia? We have queries, and thou shall answer, or we shall force perforce be moved to make a star chamber...
Javier Esposito: Stop. We are so not doing this.

Kevin Ryan: I just hope I wasn't too obvious back there. I'm just such a big fan of Erin Cherloff.
Javier Esposito: Who, the director?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, she's amazing. I'm... just speaking with her, I got this great idea for the play at Sarah Grace's preschool where I'm a volunteer at.
Javier Esposito: Wait, preschools have plays now? My preschool was going to work with my mom every day.
Richard Castle: Oh, same here. I grew up in hallways just like this. Spending time in my mother's dressing room, experimenting with her costumes, her makeup.
[Ryan and Espo both look at him weirdly]
Richard Castle: Oh, get over it. Anyway, maybe our Method actress went a little too Method. In the play, Hamlet drives Ophelia mad. If this is life imitating art and she's gone full Ophelia, we should be ready for anything.

Javier Esposito: Look, Naomi, we know that you were having a showmance with Zane. He dumped you, and then you busted up his car.
Naomi Fox: My lord, he speaks with a curious tongue. Car?
Richard Castle: It's what he's gonna put you in the back of when he arrests you for murder.
Javier Esposito: So stop the Daniel Day-Lewis routine and start talking or...
[he holds up his handcuffs]
Naomi Fox: [dropping her act] Okay, look, I wasn't in my right mind when I smashed up Zane's car, but I didn't kill him. You have to believe me. I was out late last night barhopping with some of the cast. You can check it out.
Kevin Ryan: [quietly] Barhopping? So you're not full Method.
Richard Castle: Unless she was drinking mead and eating with her fingers.

Kate Beckett: Do we have a suspect?
Javier Esposito: Not yet. Naomi's alibi checked out. But we do have a lead on this mystery woman that Zane was seeing. His financials came in. They say that he rented a limo yesterday morning.
Richard Castle: Which makes sense, since Naomi trashed his DB9.
Kate Beckett: And where was this limo going?
Javier Esposito: I don't know yet. I'm still waiting for the driver to call me back, but hopefully he knows who this woman is.
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] I have already found her. It turns out that Zane was renting a suite at the Black Door Hotel under a fake name.
Richard Castle: Ah, the Black Door. Yes, very fancy. Known for being discreet.
[seeing their expressions]
Richard Castle: Is what I've heard from other people who were once single and now married.

Kevin Ryan: [searching for the victim's 'mystery woman' at his hotel suite] NYPD.
Javier Esposito: Police.
[as they look around quietly]
Javier Esposito: Psst. There's a ginger in the bed.
[Esposito turns the lights on, and startles Martha awake]
Richard Castle: [shocked] Mother?

Richard Castle: [stammering] Mother, why are you... why... why...
[Esposito pokes him in the shoulder]
Richard Castle: Why were you in Zane's bed?
Martha Rodgers: Because he was late for our session.
Kevin Ryan: What kind of session?
Javier Esposito: Is that what they call it?
Richard Castle: That's enough.
Javier Esposito: Okay.
Richard Castle: Mother, are you saying you were sleeping with Zane Cannon?
Martha Rodgers: Oh, drop the gavel, Richard! I was his acting coach, certainly not his mistress. The poor boy was out of his depth trying to play Hamlet, so he was referred to me.

Kate Beckett: It's my turn to plan date night tonight, but I forgot, and Castle's gonna lord it over me if I don't outdo what he did last week. So I need a few ideas.
Kevin Ryan: [sardonic laugh] Wait... for Castle?
Kate Beckett: Yeah.
Kevin Ryan: Wait, wait, wait, wait. The, uh... the guy who, uh, took you on an urban-spelunking adventure through the city subway tunnels last Halloween, and then he hired actors to re-enact scenes from the movie "C.H.U.D." Yeah, I can't... I can't come up with stuff like that.

Javier Esposito: Sounds like whatever moneymaking scheme Zane was involved in is probably what got him killed. Only question is...
[seeing Ryan pantomime dancing]
Javier Esposito: What the hell are you doing, Kevin?
Kevin Ryan: [finishing] Yeah, figured it out.
Javier Esposito: What he was involved in?
Kevin Ryan: No, no, no, no, no. The uh, new choreography for Sarah Grace's preschool play.
Javier Esposito: [sarcastic] Oh, good. Why don't you keeping working on that while I solve our homicide?

Javier Esposito: Jorge "El Oso" Zamacona. He's part folk hero, part demon, the rest pure monster.
Kevin Ryan: The man kills anyone who crosses him; cops, journalists, politicians.
Kate Beckett: Zane must have been real desperate for money to want to do business with this guy.
Richard Castle: Maybe he wanted to be El Oso's new drug pipeline to Hollywood.
Kevin Ryan: Well, chances are we'll never find out. I mean, if the DEA, FBI, and the Mexican government can't find him, then what chances do we have?
Kate Beckett: I'll reach out to my Fed contacts.
Javier Esposito: Well, we'll drill down all of El Oso's stateside connections.
Kate Beckett: Okay.
Richard Castle: [Ryan and Espo leave] Well, I suppose that puts the brakes on our date night.
Kate Beckett: Uh, yeah. Sorry, Castle.
Richard Castle: Oh, no, I'm sorry for you. You're the one who put all the planning into our special evening.
Kate Beckett: [half-heartedly] Yeah, I... I did. I... Yeah, I did.
Richard Castle: You know what? I think I'll take my mother out to dinner, maybe cheer her up after all this.
Kate Beckett: You're such a good son.
Richard Castle: And you're such a good everything.

Javier Esposito: We got security footage from the garage, and it's not good.
[playing the tape]
Martha Rodgers: [she gasps in horror] Oh, my... Oh, my god.
Kevin Ryan: The Escalade is registered to a shell corp that's a known front for El Oso.
Martha Rodgers: You can track the SUV, can't you?
Kate Beckett: We can, but they probably swapped cars at least once by now, and with a two hour head start, we're looking at a hundred mile search radius, and we still have no idea what we're looking for.
Martha Rodgers: There must be something you can do. This... this is Richard's life.
Kate Beckett: [realizing something] YOLO.
Javier Esposito: That's cold, Beckett.
Kate Beckett: No, uh, Castle's new credit card. The kidnappers left his cell phone by the car, but he might still have his wallet with him. And the new YOLO card has an upgraded RFID chip in it.
Kevin Ryan: And if they passed within range of a tollbooth or a gas station...
Kate Beckett: Then it'll pick up the chip and we'll be able to track his movement.

Richard Castle: It was just instinct. He was running by, and I tripped him.
Kevin Ryan: You did good, Castle.
Richard Castle: No, not good! I... not good at all! I tripped a drug lord. It's my fault he got caught.
Kate Beckett: The DEA had the building surrounded. El Oso wasn't getting away even if you didn't trip him.

Jenny Ryan: Elodie from the preschool called about the play. It seems some of the parents have some... concerns.
Kevin Ryan: Ah, yeah. Um, they're, uh, struggling with my vision. I'll... I'll call Elodie in the morning. I'll walk her through it.
Jenny Ryan: Actually, they have decided to go a different direction.
Kevin Ryan: Wait, they're firing me? The play's tomorrow. It's that Elodie, isn't it? PTA's not enough for that mom-ster. She has to...
Jenny Ryan: Kevin, it's all the parents.
Kevin Ryan: Oh.
Jenny Ryan: Everybody loves your enthusiasm. It's just they're preschoolers. They're not Broadway stars.
Kevin Ryan: So no soft shoe?
Jenny Ryan: No. No soft shoe.

Richard Castle: All right, my Spanish is a little rusty, but my handy translator says...
Javier Esposito: Hector Zamacona's been sleeping with his brother's wife.
Richard Castle: They have been shacking up ever since El Oso went on the run.
Kate Beckett: So Zane might have been caught in a rivalry between the brothers, and that's what got him killed.
Kevin Ryan: Hector wants more than just El Oso's wife. According to the DEA, all of his, uh... "legitimate" businesses, they're suspected fronts for money laundering.
Javier Esposito: So with big brother on the run, Hector can make a play to rule the family in his place.
Richard Castle: But Hector can never truly own the throne until his brother is dead. A powerful family, a cartel for a kingdom, two brothers locked in a battle for control. Guys, this is just like the play. Hamlet's father is killed by his brother, who then takes the throne and marries the dead brother's wife. There's a reason they say Shakespeare endures. This is a real-life "Hamlet".

Kate Beckett: Why would Hector need Zane to take down El Oso?
Richard Castle: Because Hector didn't know where to find his brother.
Kevin Ryan: And movie star Zane had a face-to-face with El Oso.
Richard Castle: Making Zane the perfect Trojan horse to lead Hector to his brother.
Javier Esposito: Why would Zane agree to do that? He wanted to star in the El Oso movie.
Kate Beckett: [realizing] Money. Hector's worth hundreds of millions. Zane needed the money now, not in three years, when the movie could get off the ground.
Javier Esposito: So Hector offers to solve Zane's money problems in exchange for Zane leading him to El Oso.
Richard Castle: But El Oso refuses to meet with Zane.
Kate Beckett: Then, rather than wait to see if Zane's "Hamlet" reviews are good enough to meet with El Oso, Hector decides to cut his losses.
Richard Castle: Which, in this family, translates to murder.

Erin Cherloff: You have no idea what a risk it was putting Zane in this play. A... and the only thing that made it worthwhile was directing that movie. A... and then he tells me that... that he's gonna do it a... and I'm left with maybe the worst production of "Hamlet" in history. I mean, my career is as good as over. Do you have any idea how difficult it is as a woman to break into directing film? A... and he took away my shot like it was nothing. I heard him that night torturing maybe the most beautiful words ever written for the stage, and I just snapped.
Kevin Ryan: [handcuffing her] This way, Miss Cherloff.
Naomi Fox: Is that a wrap on rehearsal?

Javier Esposito: You still mad about being fired off Sarah Grace's preschool play?
Kevin Ryan: Ah, only at myself. I swore I'd never be that dad.
Javier Esposito: What, the kind that makes an ass of himself by dancing around like a flower for his daughter?
Kevin Ryan: No, the kind... the kind who gets caught up in what he wants, not what his kid does.


"Castle: What Lies Beneath (#8.4)" (2015)
Lanie Parish: Allow me the pleasure of introducing you to Dave Johnson, 52. Single GSW to the sternum. Killer popped him while he was praying.
[Ryan and Esposito cross themselves simultaneously]
Lanie Parish: What? Did you guys rehearse that?
Javier Esposito: Former altar boys.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Probably an involuntary reflex or something.
Lanie Parish: Wound suggests he was shot between 8:00 and 11:00 p.m. last night.
Kevin Ryan: Kind of late for a church to be open to the public, isn't it?
Lanie Parish: It wasn't. The sisters of the parish said the place was locked at 6:00, but discovered this morning that the front door had been jimmied.
Kevin Ryan: So, what, Dave and the killer broke in together?
Lanie Parish: Doubt it. Evidence shows that the killer snuck in and shot Dave from behind what was a decorative stained-glass window for prayer.
[Ryan and Esposito cross themselves again]
Lanie Parish: Really?

Kevin Ryan: Man, I thought the second kid would be cheaper. But Jenny, she wants all new stuff. You should see the baby stroller that she picked out. Seriously, I might have to get a second full-time job.
Javier Esposito: Or you can make more money from your first job.
Kevin Ryan: What, like overtime?
Javier Esposito: No, promotion. Sergeant's exam is in a week. Let's take it.
Kevin Ryan: A week? When are we gonna have time to study?
Javier Esposito: How hard can it be? Sergeant Wilke passed, and he's, like, a chromosome away from a Neanderthal.

Kate Beckett: So, I just got off the phone with P.J. Moffet's publisher. Our author is still very much alive. Dave Johnson was lying about who he was.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, we figured. So, Dave tells Milton that he's Jimmy "Two Guns" O'Malley, and then Milton rats him out to the Irish mob.
Javier Esposito: Maybe our vic was a con man.
Kate Beckett: And conning the wrong guy got him killed.

Richard Castle: [Ryan and Esposito arrive to arrest a suspect] Guys, Billy's not your killer.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, you know this how?
Richard Castle: Because Billy told me.
Javier Esposito: Ohhh... Yeah. Oh, and did he also cross his heart and hope to die?

Kevin Ryan: [following a suspect] What is this, an AA meeting?
Richard Castle: [looking at a pamphlet] PLA.
Javier Esposito: What the hell is PLA?
Richard Castle: Pathological Liars Anonymous. Makes perfect sense. Dave wasn't a con man. He was a pathological liar.

Kevin Ryan: So, what do you think?
Javier Esposito: It tracks with what our victim told his sponsor.
Kevin Ryan: And with Dave's questions about union kickbacks.
Kate Beckett: It doesn't matter. It's non-actionable. There's no way we're gonna get a subpoena for City Hall based on hearsay told to a not-blind priest from a pathological liar.

Kevin Ryan: [the case has appeared to have reached a dead end] So, what are you saying, we give up? Because that's not the Beckett that I know.
Kate Beckett: No, I'm not saying that we should give up. What I am saying is I've been a captain for about five minutes. If we take this to the D.A., nobody's gonna take me seriously, ever.
Kevin Ryan: Okay. We'll get proof.
Javier Esposito: Money's gone. Even if there is a secret slush fund, the person controlling it killed Dave to cover it up. Buried the money deep, covered his tracks.
Kevin Ryan: So what are we supposed to do?
Kate Beckett: We do our homework. We find out who could pull off a slush fund in the city budget, which means we have to talk to someone with contacts and resources in City Hall.
Kevin Ryan: Someone who's best friends with the mayor? Someone like... Castle?
Kate Beckett: [reluctant to ask him] He's gonna be so smug about this.
[cut to Castle's office, where he is video chatting with Beckett]
Richard Castle: [smugly] I'm sorry. Did you say you... needed my help?
Kate Beckett: Castle.
Richard Castle: [to Alexis] You heard her say it, right?

Richard Castle: The only people with access to the entire budget are the comptroller, the mayor's chief of staff, and the deputy chief.
Kevin Ryan: Stephen Reed. The guy we met with.
Richard Castle: I know for a fact that the chief of staff is in London with the mayor.
Javier Esposito: And I made a few discreet calls. The city comptroller was at a fundraiser when Dave was shot.
Kate Beckett: Which means Reed is our main suspect.
Kevin Ryan: Okay, so how do we get this guy?
Richard Castle: May I suggest the "Midnight Run" stratagem?
Alexis Castle: The what?
Richard Castle: "Midnight Run". It's one of the top five buddy movies of all time.
Kevin Ryan: And you're suggesting we base our legal strategy upon this buddy cop movie?
Kate Beckett: No, he's right. It could work. At the end of the movie, Robert De Niro tricks a mobster into taking computer discs he thinks contain evidence against him, and just by showing up to take them, the mobster is committing conspiracy to obstruct justice.
Richard Castle: If we can trick Reed the same way, then we've got all the leverage we need to expose the slush fund and go after him for Dave's murder. But Kate, you can't be involved.
Kate Beckett: Why not?
Kevin Ryan: Because if Reed isn't involved, then all this blows up in our face and you take the hit.

Eric Logan: This is ridiculous. I didn't kill Dave. He was my friend.
Kevin Ryan: You sure about that? Because the day he was killed, a witness saw you threatening him.
Eric Logan: I was his sponsor. He was in trouble, I was pushing him to attend the Pathological Liars Anonymous meeting.
Javier Esposito: [sarcastic] Yeah, that's the ticket. That's it. Remember?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah.
Eric Logan: How dare you, sir? Compulsive and pathological lying is a mental disorder caused by psychological trauma. This is not something to joke around about.

Kevin Ryan: [his phone chirps] Text from Castle.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, me, too.
Javier Esposito, Kevin Ryan: "My place. Important."
Kevin Ryan: Maybe he found something.
[they glance at Beckett behind them]
Javier Esposito: What do we do?
Kevin Ryan: We go over to his place, we find out what's what. Whatever we do, we don't...
[he subtly gestures to Beckett]
Javier Esposito: Oh, hell no. But what if she finds out?
Kevin Ryan: We lie our asses off.

Richard Castle: I couldn't help but overhear about your financial concerns. Maybe you and I could work together.
Kevin Ryan: How?
Richard Castle: Well, do a little, uh... moonlighting for me. Just keep me in the loop as to what's going on at the 12th.
Kevin Ryan: You want me to be a rat for you? Hell no.
Richard Castle: I would pay you five hundred a week.
Kevin Ryan: I'll do it.

Kate Beckett: So, what do we know?
Kevin Ryan: Dave Johnson. He was a pathological liar who stumbled upon a secret slush fund and then decided to expose it.
Javier Esposito: And everyone connected to that alibied out.
Kate Beckett: So we've got nothing?
Richard Castle: No. We can safely assume that Dave was killed over a lie.
Kate Beckett: [sighs] Which lie, then?
Richard Castle: Well, if I was writing this, I would fall back on a theme. A lie... is a betrayal of trust. And there is no greater betrayal than a lie in a marriage.
Kate Beckett: [aware of the lie she's telling Castle] Yeah, well, that might be, but Wendy thought that Dave was P.J. Moffet.
Richard Castle: What if she found out he wasn't?

Kevin Ryan: Listen, I'm gonna call 1PP, and I'm gonna ask them to give you that last sergeant's exam slot instead of me.
Javier Esposito: I don't need your charity.
Kevin Ryan: It's not charity.
[Espo scoffs]
Kevin Ryan: Hey! Hey, I did wrong by you. I'm trying to make amends here.
Kate Beckett: [approaching] Hey, bozos. Did it ever occur to you that your captain could pull some strings and get you both a slot?
Kevin Ryan: Did you?
Kate Beckett: Yeah. And I expect you to pass.


"Castle: The Wild Rover (#5.18)" (2013)
Special Agent Sam Walker: [V.O] You've been out of it a long time, Detective. There's a new hierarchy. And you're going to have to win them over, fast. Seven years since you've been Fenton. It's not enough to act like him. You must become him.
Kevin Ryan: I am Fenton O'Connell.
Special Agent Sam Walker: [V.O] If you're not convincing, you're dead.
Kevin Ryan: I am Fenton O'Connell.

[being led out of the precinct, Siobhan spots Ryan]
Siobhan O'Doul: Fenton?
Kevin Ryan: Siobhan?
Siobhan O'Doul: Fenton!
[Siobhan runs up to Ryan and, in front of Jenny, kisses him full on the mouth]
Jenny Ryan: Hey! What the hell are you doing? That's my husband!
Siobhan O'Doul: You're married?
[Siobhan slaps Ryan]
Richard Castle: Whoa, lady, you can't slap a cop.
Siobhan O'Doul: You're a cop?
[Siobhan slaps him the other way; patrol cops carry her away]
Siobhan O'Doul: You liar! You son of a bitch! How could you? Get off of me! Let go!
[as things settle down, Jenny looks her question at Ryan]
Kevin Ryan: [awkward pause] I can explain.

Kevin Ryan: [entering Bobby's bar, in character] What? This is the welcome I get? Huh? None of you Irish bastards missed me, huh?
Siobhan O'Doul: Fenton? Fenton O'Connell!
Kevin Ryan: Hey, Siobhan.
[as he approaches Siobhan, another woman walks up to him and slugs him, to a chorus of laughter from the patrons]
Kevin Ryan: Nice to see you, too, Maggie.
Maggie Finch: What'd you expect, a parade? After what you did to Siobhan?
[Maggie tries to punch him again, but Ryan catches her fist]
Kevin Ryan: Uh-uh. One shot's all you get.

Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: So, should I welcome home the prodigal son, or should I have Liam put a bullet in the back of your head?
Liam Finch: [aiming his gun at Ryan] Oh, just say the word, Bobby.
[Ryan disarms Liam, puts the gun in Bobby's hand, and points the barrel at his own forehead]
Kevin Ryan: You think I'm some kind of rat? That I'm a man without honor? Then you pull the trigger.
[Ryan cocks the hammer]
Kevin Ryan: You doubt me, Bobby? You do it yourself.
[after a tense moment, Bobby lowers the gun and laughs]
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: Fenton's back. Welcome home.

Kevin Ryan: My name's not Fenton. It's Kevin Ryan, and I'm a cop.
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: What? Cop?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. And I'm placing the three of you under arrest.
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: Well, that would be a hell of a trick, considering Liam's about to shoot you and your girlfriend.
Kevin Ryan: Wait a second, Liam. Before you do that, let me ask you a question. Where's your cell phone, huh?
Liam Finch: What?
Kevin Ryan: Remember when we tussled back in the hall? Yeah, I picked your pocket. And then when you weren't looking, I dialed my partner and left the line open.
Liam Finch: No way.
Kevin Ryan: He heard exactly where we were going.
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: Liam?
Liam Finch: He's full of crap, Bobby. He's bluffing.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, am I? Why don't we meet my partner, huh? Yo, Javi, where you at?
[nothing happens; after a moment, Esposito approaches with his shotgun drawn]
Javier Esposito: Right here, bro.
[Bobby, Liam, and Bobby's thug all draw their guns]
Kevin Ryan: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, he is former Special Forces. You do not want to draw on him. Want to meet the rest of my crew? Hey, Beckett!
Kate Beckett: [approaching from behind Bobby] You called, Ryan?
Kevin Ryan: Don't let the looks fool you, boys. You don't want to mess with her, either. Castle!
Richard Castle: [stepping out from his hiding place behind Beckett] Seriously? I didn't... I didn't bring my vest.
Kevin Ryan: [to Bobby and Liam, as squad cars approach] Drop your weapons. Now.

Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: Do I know you?
Kevin Ryan: What the hell? It's me, Fenton.
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: I recall knowing a Fenton O'Connell years ago. He was like a brother to me. Real stand-up guy. 'Till he cut and ran.
Kevin Ryan: Come on, Bobby. I got ratted out, you know that. Me hanging around would have just brought more heat down on everyone.
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: So you made yourself scarce. In fact, no one's heard from you in... seven years. Where you been?
Kevin Ryan: Out west. Been making some moves here and there until the statute of limitations ran out. Tell you the truth, Bobby, I didn't want to come home 'till I had something to bring to the table.
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: Well, friend, here's the table.
Kevin Ryan: I heard the feds took down Ben Gideon. So you might be in need of some product. I've been working with the Mason brothers out of Chicago.
Liam Finch: [Bobby gives him a look of question] I've heard of them.
Kevin Ryan: It's a stable source. Quality stuff. I can get you whatever you need. This is me stepping up, Bobby.
Robert 'Bobby S.' Shannon: So, what, you're the wild rover from the song? Returning with gold in great store, is that it? Or are you a rat?
Kevin Ryan: You know me better than that. Look, I said my piece. And I'm not gonna beg, Bobby. It's up to you, okay?

Kevin Ryan: Damn. Bobby S. Are we thinking that this guy is the one that took out Jimmy Whelan?
Kate Beckett: Wait, you know Bobby S.?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, we were friends back in the day.
Javier Esposito: You were friends with this lowlife? How's that?
Kevin Ryan: We used to run on the same crew. I was undercover for fourteen months before I joined Homicide.
Kate Beckett: You were undercover on Staten Island?
Richard Castle: With the Irish mob?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. So, what do we got on Bobby S.?
Javier Esposito: No. Hold up, hold up, hold up. Just go back for a second, please. You were undercover? That's where you and Siobhan used...?
Kevin Ryan: It's complicated.
Richard Castle: [a little too interested] I love complicated.

Siobhan O'Doul: So I guess it's not Fenton O'Connell.
Kevin Ryan: It's Kevin. Kevin Ryan.
Siobhan O'Doul: Well, at least you're Irish. You didn't lie about that.
Kevin Ryan: I didn't lie about a lot of things.
Siobhan O'Doul: They said you went into hiding. Seven years without a word.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, I know.
Siobhan O'Doul: You do not know!
Kevin Ryan: Believe me, I didn't want to go.
Siobhan O'Doul: Spare me. You didn't even have the guts to tell me to my face. Just a note on the dresser.
Kevin Ryan: Siobhan, I know you're angry. But if you're in trouble, if you know something about Bobby S. killing this guy, tell me. Let me help you.
Siobhan O'Doul: You can go straight to hell, cop.

Special Agent Sam Walker: Special Agent Sam Walker, FBI.
Kate Beckett: I'm Detective Beckett. This is Detective Ryan and Esposito.
Special Agent Sam Walker: Ryan. Kevin Ryan?
Javier Esposito: You've heard of him?
Special Agent Sam Walker: Yeah, of course. This man got inside the Irish mob with a wire when no one else could. You helped put away half the crew in Staten Island.
Kevin Ryan: Too bad the weeds grew back, huh?
Special Agent Sam Walker: They always do.

Kevin Ryan: [spotting a stuffed animal in Siobhan's apartment] Oh, come on. You still have this little guy? Wait, uh... what was his name again?
Siobhan O'Doul: How could you forget? Mr. Whiskers. You spent over fifty bucks trying to win him for me.
Kevin Ryan: That ring toss was a bitch.
Siobhan O'Doul: Well, it was worth every penny. He's seen me through some pretty rough times. Was any of it real?
Kevin Ryan: What I felt was.

Kevin Ryan: It's risky meeting like this. It better be important.
Javier Esposito: Bobby S. didn't kill Jimmy. The real killer stole his car and set him up.
Kevin Ryan: Or... Bobby ordered the hit and loaned his car to the killer.
Javier Esposito: No, bro. Forensic evidence was purposefully left behind. It's a frame. Probably somebody in his own crew.
Kevin Ryan: Okay, I'll keep my eyes open.
Javier Esposito: What good is that gonna do you? Hmm? What good is that gonna do you when something goes down, I'm not there to back you up? What you need to do is walk away.
Kevin Ryan: I'll walk away when I'm done.
Javier Esposito: What's wrong with you? You got a lot to lose, man. You got Jenny, you're trying to start a family.
Kevin Ryan: I don't need you to tell me what's at stake here. Look, man, I got invited to Bobby S.'s pool game tonight. This is it. This is my shot at getting that bible.
Javier Esposito: It's not worth it, man.
Kevin Ryan: [standing to leave] I'll call you when I get it.

Kevin Ryan: Maggie. You know, I pegged you for a lot of things, but never a killer.
Maggie Finch: Yeah, I pegged you for a lot of things, but never a narc.
Kevin Ryan: Actually, it's... see, I'm a homicide detective, which is why I know that you killed Jimmy the baker.
Maggie Finch: Jimmy the who?
Kate Beckett: Oh, god, are we actually gonna play this game? It's late. I am tired. Officers went through your house and they found your gun.
Kevin Ryan: Same caliber that killed Jimmy. It's only a matter of time before we get a ballistics match.

Siobhan O'Doul: I was hoping you'd come.
Kevin Ryan: I wanted to say goodbye this time.
Siobhan O'Doul: "Goodbye" makes me feel like I'll never see you again.
Kevin Ryan: You won't. Tomorrow you'll be in a new city, have a new name. You'll get to start over again.
Siobhan O'Doul: Why'd you do this? Risk your life for me?
Kevin Ryan: You know why.
Siobhan O'Doul: This Kevin Ryan guy, I wish I would have met him sooner.


"Castle: Death Wish (#8.17)" (2016)
Richard Castle: [seeing Ryan yawning] Early morning or late night?
Kevin Ryan: Both. Jenny can't sleep, which in her crazy, nine month pregnant logic means, out of solidarity, I'm not allowed to sleep, either.

Kevin Ryan: Apparently, Lars was really into the Middle East.
Richard Castle: Oh, a region known for its sordid history of beheading. And yet... Lars was beheaded here in Manhattan.
[picking up a book from the bookshelf and showing it to them]
Richard Castle: Hmm. Perhaps Lars made the mistake of telling the king the ending of the story. Am I right?
[Espo, Ryan, and Lanie all look at him blankly]
Richard Castle: "1001 Arabian Nights".
[still no reaction]
Richard Castle: Truly, I am shocked. How is it that none of you know the story of "1001 Arabian Nights"?
Lanie Parish: We weren't nerds in high school.
Richard Castle: Fair enough. Lucky for you, class is now in session. In the story "1001 Arabian Nights", a jealous king would sleep with a new young maiden every night, then have her beheaded so no other men could have her.
Lanie Parish: So it's a story about a misogynistic serial killer?
Richard Castle: No. Well, yes. But no. In the story, to stop the bloodshed, a young maiden by the name of Scheherazade wove a fascinating tale for the king, but she refused to tell him the ending, forcing him to keep her alive 'till the next night so she could finish the story. She told him a new story every night for a thousand and one nights 'till finally the king married her, which really tells a lot about the power of a good storyteller.
Kevin Ryan: Yet tells us nothing about why our victim was killed.
Richard Castle: Or does it? Our victim was tortured because the killer, like the king, wanted something.

Kevin Ryan: Our victim's sister is meeting me in the precinct. Maybe she can shed some light on what that thing was.
Javier Esposito: I'll pull a warrant for Lars' new safe deposit box, see if there's a clue as to what our killer was after.
Richard Castle: [his phone rings] Oh. This is Oprah's assistant. Um, I'll take this. Uh, you guys... "head" out without me.
[Espo and Ryan aren't amused]
Richard Castle: I'll... "be heading" to the precinct in just a little while. Guys, these are comedy gold. Seriously.

Kate Beckett: Hey, Castle, um, what was the name of that woman that you interviewed? Lars' neighbor.
Richard Castle: I didn't get her name.
Kate Beckett: I think my unis forgot to put her statement in this file. I swear, most of my time is spent checking people's paperwork.
Richard Castle: You're suffering from a little buyer's remorse. Yeah, it's one of life's cruel jokes. You get exactly what you wished for, only to find that it wasn't what you wanted at all.
Kate Beckett: No, I love being a captain. It's just sometimes it feels like I'm more of a kindergarten teacher.
[Ryan and Esposito enter, bickering]
Javier Esposito: I'm a sergeant. Get out of my way.
Kevin Ryan: Hey!
Javier Esposito: I just broke this case wide open.
Kevin Ryan: Actually, I did, so I'll go first.
Javier Esposito: No, I think I'll go first. Mine's bigger than yours.
Kevin Ryan: You wish, pal.
Kate Beckett: Guys. Play nice. Indoor voices. Espo goes first.
Javier Esposito: See? She knows.

Javier Esposito: So, I opened Lars' safe deposit box and found 400 G's in cash. Gots to be drug money. Beat that.
Kevin Ryan: Easy. Got Lars' encrypted laptop from Mark, found out what he was smuggling, and it wasn't drugs.
Javier Esposito: What?
Richard Castle: No! Lars wasn't a drug dealer. He was a tomb raider. Ryan, can you zoom in on that, please?
[Ryan zooms in on a picture]
Richard Castle: I've seen that symbol. Yes, uh... at Lars' apartment. You remember there was all those books on "1001 Arabian Nights". I think that symbol was on one of the books. Yes, here it is. The Seal of Solomon. "The Seal of Solomon was believed to be imbued with mystical powers, including the ability to seal genies into lamps. In the tale of Aladdin and the Magic Lamp, Aladdin finds a lamp containing a genie in a cave. Many people believe this cave was actually King Solomon's tomb, which is most likely located near the border of Syria and Turkey." You guys, you know what this means?
Kate Beckett: [under her breath] Oh, please no.
Richard Castle: Come on. The money, the Porsche. Lars wished for them, and his wishes were granted...
Kate Beckett: And here we go.
Richard Castle: ...by a genie! Lars found Aladdin's lamp!

Richard Castle: Look at this. These books from Lars' apartment on "1001 Arabian Nights", they all have handwritten notes in them.
Javier Esposito: This one has... maps drawn in it.
Kevin Ryan: This one has his theories of where King Solomon is buried.
Richard Castle: These books were his research that he used in conjunction with his skills as a sonar engineer to unearth King Solomon's tomb.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, we're with you on that.
Richard Castle: And find the magical lamp with the genie in it.
Javier Esposito: That's where you lose us, Castle.

Kate Beckett: The only thing magical about that lamp is the millions of dollars that private collectors are willing to pay for it.
Kevin Ryan: Come on, Castle, you don't really believe in genies, do you?
Richard Castle: I believe that until I hear a more viable theory as to where Lars got all that money that this is the best theory I've got.
Javier Esposito: So a genie is your best explanation?
Kate Beckett: Not that Lars sold one of the items in Turkey before smuggling the rest back here?
Richard Castle: Okay, it's a... pretty good theory.
Kevin Ryan: Or that Lars double-crossed his partner, and that's probably where all the cash came from.
Richard Castle: Fine. That's a good theory, too.
Kate Beckett: No, no, no. That's... that's better than good. It explains why the killer tortured him. If it was his partner, then he would've wanted to find out what happened to the rest of the antiquities.

Kevin Ryan: I could really use a genie right now. I would wish that my kid was already born and sleeping through the night.
Javier Esposito: Bro, fatherhood has made you so damn boring. If I had a wish, I'd use it to become the top MMA fighter in the world, and take home a different hot chick every single night.
Kevin Ryan: Okay, now that I think about it... I would wish... that I could be a Broadway star. Play Jean Valjean in front of sold-out crowds, win a bunch of Tonys.
Javier Esposito: You'd wish to wear tights and sing showtunes for a living?
Kevin Ryan: You'd wish to wear Speedos and grapple sweaty men for a living?
Javier Esposito: And hook up with a different hot chick every single night. Don't forget that part.
Kate Beckett: [approaching] You know what I wish? That my detectives would actually get some work done for a living. While the two of you were on fantasy island, I found a lead.

Javier Esposito: [questioning a suspect] That explains the cash that we found in Lars' safe deposit box.
Kevin Ryan: Right, but how the hell did Lars get his hands on 400,000 bucks?
Kate Beckett: [in the observation room with Castle] Uh, don't... don't say that he wished for it. He probably got the money from the financier. But... but the one thing that doesn't make sense is if Lars already had the extortion money, then why did the shipper kill him?
[before he can say anything]
Kate Beckett: Uh, don't... do not say that it was to gain control of the genie.
Richard Castle: I wasn't gonna.
[seeing her expression]
Richard Castle: Okay, I was. But there is another possibility. Maybe the shipper kept the treasure for himself.
Kate Beckett: Well, then why torture Lars? I mean, what information could he possibly want if he already had the artifacts?

Kate Beckett: [Ryan and Espo are leaving to follow a lead] If you find that lamp and Castle's not there, I'm never gonna hear the end of it.
Javier Esposito: We'll have him meet us there.
Kate Beckett: Okay, great.
[the elevator doors start to close]
Kate Beckett: Ooh, can you just... can you make sure that gets dibs on the first rub, please?
Kevin Ryan: Mm-hmm.
Javier Esposito: Mm-hmm.
Kate Beckett: Good. Thanks. I owe you.
[the elevator doors close]
Kate Beckett: [under her breath] Can't believe I said that.

Kevin Ryan: By the time we put a net over the neighborhood, the truck and treasure were gone, and because you didn't get a license plate, we have little chance of finding them.
Richard Castle: It all happened so fast.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, right, and yet you did have time to creep over to the lamp, examine it, get help at gunpoint, rub the lamp, make a wish upon the lamp, and have a genie appear in a puff of smoke and knock the 'woman thug' over the head with a 2x4.
Richard Castle: You forgot the part where it was dark and super dusty.
Kevin Ryan: Castle, you're just lucky that Lanie was able to pull DNA off Yuruk's body.
Richard Castle: Did she manage to get a match?
Kevin Ryan: No, but she was able to determine that the killer was a female.
Richard Castle: Most likely the woman holding me at gunpoint.
Kevin Ryan: Or your magical blonde genie.
Javier Esposito: [approaching] The one only Castle's seen.
Kevin Ryan: Hmm.
Richard Castle: Wait a minute. So neither of you believe me?
Javier Esposito: Oh, no, bro, I... I do believe you. I actually... I was able to ID the genie based on your description.
Richard Castle: [Espo hands over a folder] Good work.
[opening the folder, he finds a picture of Barbara Eden as Jeannie from "I Dream of Jeannie"; Ryan and Espo both laugh]
Richard Castle: Laugh it up, you guys. I still have two wishes left. I'm not above using them for evil.

Alexis Castle: The mystery blonde is real.
Richard Castle: Thank you!
Alexis Castle: But she's not a genie. Her name is Genevieve Sutton. She has an office on Second Avenue. She's listed as a security consultant.
Kevin Ryan: A fixer by the sound of it.
Javier Esposito: Now, how did you get this info, Alexis?
Alexis Castle: Well, after dad left, I dusted his desk for prints. Got a little help from Hayley, who ran them through the DMV database, and voila.
Richard Castle: [crestfallen] So she's not a genie?
Alexis Castle: Sorry.
Richard Castle: Genevieve is short for "genie". I mean, seriously, if she can grant wishes, a driver's license, that would be a piece of cake.
Alexis Castle: Mm-hmm, but why would a genie want to do that?
Kevin Ryan: Oh, seriously, who cares?
Javier Esposito: Make-believe time with Castle is over.
Kevin Ryan: We're gonna bring in Genevieve and find out the real story.
Alexis Castle: [Ryan and Espo leave] Someone need some ice cream?
Richard Castle: Me.


"Castle: The Last Seduction (#8.7)" (2015)
[first lines]
Javier Esposito: You could have killed me!
Kevin Ryan: How many times do I have to say "I'm sorry" for shooting you in the ass? It was an accident. When are you gonna let it go?
Javier Esposito: When I can sit on my ass without using a pillow.
Therapist: So I take it there's been little progress since our last session.
Kevin Ryan: [sardonic laugh] No, not with his trust issues.
Javier Esposito: I don't have trust issues. He has jealousy issues.
Kevin Ryan: Okay, for the last time, I am not jealous that you passed the sergeant's exam.
Javier Esposito: Tell that to the hole in my ass!
[seeing the therapist's expression]
Javier Esposito: The one that he put there, not the... I'm sorry.

Richard Castle: Tomorrow is the first wedding anniversary for Beckett and me, and I was just hoping that you could distract her while I set up a surprise in her office.
Kevin Ryan: I don't know, Castle. Beckett doesn't want you hanging around the precinct.
Richard Castle: It's just a little surprise.
Javier Esposito: Castle, nothing you do is little.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Probably come riding in on an elephant.
Javier Esposito: And then he takes her and the elephant up in a hot air balloon.
Richard Castle: [they all share a laugh] Well, the first anniversary's paper, but otherwise, that's not a bad idea.

Kevin Ryan: These drawers are all empty. Strange. It's like he only wanted to make it look like he lived here.
Javier Esposito: Maybe this is where he was knocking boots with the married ladies.
Kevin Ryan: [under his breath] Sherlock Homeboy's got a theory.
Javier Esposito: I'm sorry, what did you just say?
Kevin Ryan: I said "This place is really eerie."
Javier Esposito: That is not what you said.
Richard Castle: Okay, time out. Guys, in my official capacity as buffer, I'd like to recommend that we try something.
Javier Esposito: No more role-playing.
Richard Castle: No, this is something my second wife, Gina, and I used to do to avoid arguments. Instead of blurting out whatever was on our minds, we would write it down to revisit it later.
Kevin Ryan: So nothing's said in the heat of the moment.
Richard Castle: Exactly. See, we found with a little perspective, what seemed so important to us at first was often quite trivial. Sort of like our marriage.

Lanie Parish: Nine separate entry wounds. Lividity puts the stabbing between midnight and 2:00 a.m.
Kevin Ryan: Nine entry wounds? That sounds like a crime of passion.
Richard Castle: Yeah. Either that or someone wanted to be really, really sure.

Javier Esposito: Annika has been posting about she's gonna be flying to Paris tonight.
Kevin Ryan: And we need to get some hard evidence tying our vic to one of these women.
Kate Beckett: Castle, you said that they were gonna spend the day at the spa?
Richard Castle: Yes. Where all body art will be on full display. If one of them has that tattoo...
Kate Beckett: Then we can bring them in. I just need a partner to go with me into the women's locker room.
[Castle, Ryan, and Esposito all immediately raise their hands]
Kate Beckett: A female partner, guys.

Kevin Ryan: And when you I.D.ed the tattoo, did you pull the towel off or did it just... fall off?
Hayley Shipton: Well, actually, Kate pulled the towel off, but I'm not quite sure how this is relevant.
Javier Esposito: You're pathetic, bro.
Kevin Ryan: Somebody's gotta write this report.
Javier Esposito: Wow. So, Hayley, it must have been pretty hard for you guys to chase her, 'cause you and Beckett were both wearing towels, right?
Kate Beckett: [entering, to Hayley] Hey. Okay, here you go. This is your voucher. Just take that up to Evidence, and that painting is yours.
Hayley Shipton: All right. I'll see you perverts later.
Javier Esposito: Yes, you will.
[seeing Beckett's expression]
Javier Esposito: Ryan was trying to get details on your wardrobe malfunction.
Kevin Ryan: Me? You were the one asking if Beckett was wearing a towel.

Richard Castle: So, let me get this straight: you want me to see a divorce attorney tomorrow, on my wedding anniversary.
Kevin Ryan: To pose as a client.
Martha Rodgers: No, no, no. I don't think so, Richard. Does Katherine know about this?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, no. No. And, um, she's not going to. Best to give her, uh, plausible deniability in case this thing goes sideways.

Kate Beckett: So you sent Castle on a surveillance mission after I told you he was not to work any more NYPD cases.
Kevin Ryan: We didn't think you should know. We were trying to protect you.
Kate Beckett: By sending my husband to the city's top divorce attorney?
Javier Esposito: Happy anniversary?

Javier Esposito: George Keller.
Alexis Castle: According to Lindsey's log book, he is the last person billed for Scott's services.
Kevin Ryan: Is he connected to Keller Toys?
Richard Castle: He's the president of the entire Keller empire. Toys, video games, books, educational videos, you name it. It's a multi-billion dollar company.
Alexis Castle: And a brand synonymous with family values, which is ironic since he's a renowned playboy, already on wife number three.
Richard Castle: You say that like it's a bad thing.

Richard Castle: How are things between the boys?
Kate Beckett: Not good, actually. I'm kind of worried about them.
Richard Castle: Oh, they'll work it out. They've been through way too much together to give up on what they have.
Kate Beckett: [sensing the implication of their own relationship] You're a wise man, Castle. With a big heart. And you're rather good-looking, too.
Richard Castle: You might want to pace yourself on the flattery. You've got a whole dinner to get through.
Kevin Ryan: [loudly] Come on, Javi. Just say it.
Javier Esposito: Trust me, you don't want to hear what I really think.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, bring it on.
Javier Esposito: All right. You're a whiny, insecure, jealous little baby who shot me in the ass on purpose!
Kevin Ryan: And you are an arrogant, manscaped Neanderthal. And it wasn't on purpose. Next time, it's gonna be.
Javier Esposito: That's it. I want a new partner!
Kevin Ryan: Me, too!
Richard Castle: Oh, we can't leave them like this, can we?
Kate Beckett: [sigh] I'll talk to Javi.
Richard Castle: I'll see if I can calm Ryan down. Rain check on dinner?
Kate Beckett: Yeah.

[intercut between two parallel conversations]
Kevin Ryan: How'd it all go so wrong? I mean, one day we're a team. Simpatico, finishing each other's sentences. And then...
Richard Castle: You shot him in the ass.
Kate Beckett: It was an accident, Jav.
Javier Esposito: Oh, was it? You sure about that?
Kate Beckett: Yeah. And deep down in your heart, you are, too.
Javier Esposito: It doesn't matter. Once the trust is gone, it's really hard to get it back.
Kate Beckett: No, that's not true. A strong relationship can survive anything.
Richard Castle: No relationship can survive secrets, or lies. Now, you need to tell Esposito the truth; that you were hurt and jealous that he passed the test and you didn't.
Kevin Ryan: Forget that. He... he rubbed it in my face, remember? "Sergeant Esposito."
Richard Castle: You need to apologize.
Javier Esposito: Hell, no. I am not apologizing to him.
Kate Beckett: Why not?
Javier Esposito: Even before he shot me, he couldn't believe that I passed and he didn't.
Kate Beckett: You have to let it go.
Richard Castle: You have to let it go.
Kevin Ryan: I can't.
Javier Esposito: I can't.

Kevin Ryan: [with the killer cornered] Don't move. I'll shoot your ass.
Javier Esposito: He'll do it, too. Trust me.


"Castle: Heartbreaker (#8.16)" (2016)
Javier Esposito: The Department of Corrections authorized her furlough?
Kate Beckett: Yeah. Right now, Sonia is our best and only path to Hammerhead's real identity.
Kevin Ryan: So what's the plan?
Kate Beckett: You and Espo are gonna head over to the...
[seeing Espo is a bit uncomfortable]
Kate Beckett: Excuse me. What's going on? What are you not telling me?
Javier Esposito: [awkward laugh] So, funny story, really, uh...
Kevin Ryan: What?
Javier Esposito: Uh... uh... Sonia and I were kind of involved.
Richard Castle: "Involved" like dating?
Javier Esposito: [scoffs] Dating? No. Come on. Dating. We... we were more like engaged.

Kevin Ryan: [learning Esposito was engaged to a robbery perp] Engaged? You were... wait a second. All those years, you never told me that?
Javier Esposito: You never asked.
Kevin Ryan: You're a cop. How could you get involved with a criminal?
Richard Castle: Well, technically, they were in the same line of work. So, really, it's a workplace romance.
Javier Esposito: [sarcastic] Thank you. I didn't know she was a crook at first, okay? I... I met her at a club. She seemed normal. We just... we just clicked. And it's probably why she hid who she really was from me.
Kate Beckett: A... and again, when did you find out the truth?
Javier Esposito: After it was too late! We were engaged, and then she started acting strange; disappearing at odd hours, and then she couldn't look me in the eye. And then news of that gold coin heist broke, and I... I don't know. I knew. And I was the one who arrested her.
Richard Castle: So, did you ask for the ring back, or did you let her keep that so she could trade it for cigarettes in the prison yard?
[seeing Espo's expression]
Richard Castle: That's... don't answer that.

Javier Esposito: Why are you benching me?
[seeing Beckett's expression]
Javier Esposito: Okay. I get it. But there's no need. Any feelings I had for her died the moment I slapped those cuffs on. Trust me, I am over her completely.
[Sonia enters, dressed in a sexy outfit, and Espo is dumbstruck]
Sonia Ruiz: Javier?
Kevin Ryan: [she's led into another room by a patrol officer] You sure you're over her?
Richard Castle: [closing Espo's mouth for him] You might want to tell your mouth. Close that up.

Kevin Ryan: I still can't believe Javi was engaged to that woman.
Richard Castle: Oh, I can. I mean, you see the electricity between those two? It crackles.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, that might be a problem. We need to keep an eye on her.
Richard Castle: Well, actually, I think we can do more than that. There's a listening device built into Sonia's ankle monitor.
Kevin Ryan: A hidden mic?
Richard Castle: Yeah. All we have to do is enter the security number into the app, we can hear everything they're saying.
Kevin Ryan: But they wouldn't know we were listening. That would be an invasion of their privacy.
Richard Castle: You got a problem with that?
Kevin Ryan: [laughing it off] No! No.

Kevin Ryan: [Esposito is following a lead] Wait, does that sound like...
Richard Castle: [excited] It sounds like he's playing Five Finger Fillet with the bartender. It certainly does.
Kevin Ryan, Richard Castle: Don't tell Beckett.

Kevin Ryan: Let me see your hands!
Sonia Ruiz: What? What, you think I was trying to escape? I see a gun and I run. I was trying to get to a phone to call 911.
Kevin Ryan: Not buying it, sweetheart.
Sonia Ruiz: Irish, I got three months left on my sentence, okay? I already served nine long years. I run right now, they add another two. How dumb do you think I am?
Javier Esposito: Don't answer that. It's a trap; trust me.
Richard Castle: You think she's telling the truth?
Javier Esposito: I don't know. It's not like she hasn't lied to me before.

Javier Esposito: [Sonia cut off her monitoring anklet and is in the wind] Where's Beckett?
Kevin Ryan: She doesn't know, because if she did, you'd be in deep trouble. So we're gonna track your girl down before the captain finds out.

Kevin Ryan: If Sonia was communicating with the killer and she orchestrated this whole armored car heist to look exactly like the one she went to prison for, knowing that we'd go to talk to her...
Javier Esposito: Then Sonia would get out and lead us to Joey, who pulled a gun so she could run away. The whole thing was an escape plan that she set up with Joey beforehand. Unfortunately for Sonia, we ran her down.
Kevin Ryan: Okay, assuming all this is true, why now? I mean, she had three months left until parole. Why throw that all away?
Javier Esposito: I don't know. But I bet you Joey does.

Joey Montez: I don't know what you're talking about.
Kevin Ryan: We pulled your financials, Joey. You know, it turns out that Chicken Chicken Chicken is bankrupt, bankrupt, bankrupt.

Richard Castle: If Sonia and her partner wanted to kill Esposito, they would have done it here. No, they must need him for something.
Kevin Ryan: The question is why was Sonia so desperate to see her father before he died? According to Espo, they weren't even that close.
Richard Castle: Maybe he has something she wanted.
[spotting something under a chair]
Richard Castle: And I think I know what it is.
[picking the object up, he shows it to Beckett and Ryan]
Kate Beckett: Gold. He was holding her cut of the heist from nine years ago.
Kevin Ryan: Sonia didn't want the secret of the gold's location to die with her father.
Richard Castle: They took Esposito for insurance in case we tried to stop them.
Kate Beckett: Which means we find Pena's coin stash, we'll find Espo.
Kevin Ryan: Problem is we don't know the first thing about this guy.
Kate Beckett: Well, time for a crash course. Let's tear this place apart.

Kate Beckett: Sonia's dad owned at least a half a dozen businesses; dry cleaners, car wash, a Cuban restaurant.
Richard Castle: All high cash flow. Makes sense. If he was selling off his gold bit by bit, he'd need a place to launder the money.
Kate Beckett: Well, according to the company's bank records, the weekly receipts were pretty uniform.
Richard Castle: Except look at this. The dry cleaners, about three months ago, there was a spike in the weekly deposit amount, and three months before that and before that.
Kate Beckett: Same with the restaurant.
Richard Castle: So he was retrieving some of the gold every three months, selling it off, and then running the proceeds through his businesses.
Kate Beckett: Hey, Ryan, where is Vikram with the GPS info from Pena's phone?
Kevin Ryan: He just sent this over. Pena stayed close to home most of the time, except for this location.
[he shows them on his tablet]
Kevin Ryan: Looks to be an outlier. He wouldn't go there often, only once every...
Richard Castle: Every three months?
Kevin Ryan: Exactly. And only at night.
Kate Beckett: And what's there?
Richard Castle: Let's see, uh... it's an old Con Ed storage facility. Perfect place for stashing coins.
Kate Beckett: Pena owned a transport company that subcontracts with Con Ed.
Richard Castle: Then that's it. That's where he is.
Kate Beckett: Let's go. Once they find the gold, they're gonna make a run for it.
Richard Castle: After they kill Espo.


"Castle: XY (#8.1)" (2015)
Javier Esposito: Bro, what are you doing? You know I got dibs on Beckett's desk.
Kevin Ryan: I will play you Knife, Gun, Kevlar for it.
Javier Esposito: Let's do this.
[they punch their palms like one does during Rock, Paper, Scissors]
Kevin Ryan: Knife.
Javier Esposito: Gun. You fool, you brought a knife to a gun fight? Blam.
Kevin Ryan: Two out of three.
Javier Esposito: No way. Kick rocks.

Richard Castle: How's the new boss lady treating you?
Javier Esposito: She's ignoring me.
Kevin Ryan: Just like every other woman in his life.

Richard Castle: Beckett got a call from some guy this morning.
Kevin Ryan: Do you know who she was talking to?
Richard Castle: She said it was a telemarketer. What is she doing? What the hell is going on?

Richard Castle: All right, let's think. Beckett gets a call from a mystery man. Can we trace the phone?
Javier Esposito: Already checked. Call came from a burner phone.
Richard Castle: Oh, damn it. All right. She must have met this guy at the theater. Clearly they were ambushed. Beckett gets shot. But she manages to take three of them out, and then she and the man escape.
Javier Esposito: But she didn't call for backup.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Why wouldn't she reach out to us?
Richard Castle: Guys, the woman just sewed herself up with a needle and thread. Clearly something's going on, and she's afraid to contact anyone.
Kevin Ryan: But what? I me... I mean, what could it be that would cause her to react like this?
Richard Castle: Whatever it is, it has to do with this man. We find the man, we find Beckett.

Kevin Ryan: Storage locker was rented with a stolen ID. Who do we know who's been chasing those?
Javier Esposito: Hayley Shipton.
Kevin Ryan: She must have a list of all stolen IDs in that bundle. Used it to track our shooters here.
Javier Esposito: And to convince Castle to run with her instead of us.
Kevin Ryan: What the hell's he thinking?
Javier Esposito: He's not. He's reacting, trying whatever he can to find Beckett.
Kevin Ryan: It's gonna get him killed.

Alexis Castle: Dad's missing! We have to find him!
Javier Esposito: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. What are you... what are you talking about?
Alexis Castle: I've been tracking his cell phone on the sly. That way, if he ever disappeared again, I'd know. And an hour ago, his phone suddenly went dead.
Kevin Ryan: Okay, maybe the battery just died.
Alexis Castle: No. Not with where he went.
Kevin Ryan: And where's that?
Alexis Castle: Winterkill Correctional. I tracked Beckett there earlier.
Javier Esposito: Winterkill. That's where Bracken is.
Alexis Castle: He's connected to this somehow. That's why dad went to see him.

Javier Esposito: We got a positive ID on the guy running with Beckett.
Richard Castle: Great. Who is he?
Kevin Ryan: His name is Vikram Singh. He's a low-level analyst for the Attorney General's investigative office.
Alexis Castle: In D.C.? That's where Beckett worked.
Richard Castle: Yeah, but that was two years ago, and she never mentioned anyone named Vikram.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, as far as we can tell, their paths never crossed. He's only been on the job a few months.
Richard Castle: Then how would Beckett know him? We need to call Rachel McCord. She was Beckett's partner.
Kevin Ryan: McCord's dead, Castle. Killed yesterday in an automobile accident, along with three other members of her team.
Richard Castle: That can't be a coincidence.
Javier Esposito: It's not. The last member of her team was stabbed to death at a club that same night. Witnesses saw him flirting with a hot brunette.
Richard Castle: This doesn't make any sense. What does any of this have to do with Bracken?

Richard Castle: You know, you told me I had no idea what was going on, and you were right. But now I've got the edge of it, and I'm gonna keep on peeling it back until I know everything, with or without your help.
Kevin Ryan: I'll recommend the "with". It comes with less prison time.
Assassin: Prison's a picnic compared to what happens to me if I talk. You need to make peace with the fact that your wife isn't long for this world.
Richard Castle: Don't be so sure. Your team started out with five. Three of you are dead, and you're sitting right here. That leaves one: your boss. And Beckett against one guy? I like those odds.
Assassin: What makes you think there's only one team in play?

Kevin Ryan: Javi, we're pathetic.
Javier Esposito: No, you're pathetic. You're the one who got the crappy desk.
Kevin Ryan: No, look, I mean here we are moving desks. Everyone else is moving up. Gates, she's the new deputy chief; Beckett, she's the new captain.
Javier Esposito: So?
Kevin Ryan: So when's it gonna be our turn? Get promoted, make more money.
Javier Esposito: Bro, where's this coming from?
Kevin Ryan: Jenny's pregnant again. Found out last night.
Javier Esposito: Oh, wow. That's great. Congratulations.
[seeing Ryan's expression]
Javier Esposito: That is great, right?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's wonderful. But it's also another mouth to feed, another body to clothe. And don't get me started on college tuition.
Javier Esposito: Kevin, can't you just for one second celebrate before you start stressing about money again? Sometimes it's good to just...
Kevin Ryan: [his phone chirps] Yes! We caught ourselves a homicide. Fingers crossed for overtime pay.
Javier Esposito: Bro, there's something wrong with you.

Hayley Shipton: I don't know anything. The last time I saw Castle was outside the prison.
Javier Esposito: You'd think an ex-cop would understand obstruction of justice.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, especially since arresting her for it will torpedo her investigator's license.
Hayley Shipton: You're not scaring me, guys.
Javier Esposito: You think we're playing? Castle's one of us, which means you'd better come clean right now, or every cop in this city is gonna make it their mission to jam you up,
Hayley Shipton: I understand the passion, but I have a reputation to uphold. My clients think that I roll over every time a cop says "Boo", I'm looking for a new line of work.
Alexis Castle: [entering in a fit of anger] Damn it, my dad's in trouble. If you know anything about where he is, you have to tell us!
Hayley Shipton: Alexis... it's not that simple.
Alexis Castle: Yes, it is.

Javier Esposito: My partner and I really enjoyed reading your file.
Hayley Shipton: Aw, sweetie, I'm so much more than words on paper.
Kevin Ryan: Born and raised in East London, over in the borough of Hackney.
Javier Esposito: Rough area. Don't they have a street nicknamed the murder mile?
Hayley Shipton: Well, yes, but it's not without its charms.
Kevin Ryan: Just like you. Love your accent, by the way. Very posh. Where'd you learn to speak like that?
Javier Esposito: Not from the slum she grew up in, and definitely not from your mom, who's at the tail end of a twenty-year prison bid.
Kevin Ryan: Ah. Not wanting to follow in mum's footsteps, you joined the Metropolitan Police Service.
Javier Esposito: And that was an epic fail.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, they booted you out because of your tendency to cut legal corners.
Hayley Shipton: Allegedly.
Kevin Ryan: You hung a dealer out of a window in order to get a confession?
Hayley Shipton: Did I hang him out the window, or did I save him from falling out said window? It's hard to tell. It's even harder to prove.
Kevin Ryan: Well, lucky for us we don't have to prove that you were hiding in that apartment.
Hayley Shipton: Hiding? No. Lost. I was looking for a Starbucks, actually. Usually they're so easy to find.


"Castle: Crossfire (#8.22)" (2016)
Kevin Ryan: No matter how long I've been on the job, the burned ones always get me.
Javier Esposito: Yo, Lanie, we have a name?
Lanie Parish: No, he's a John Doe.
Javier Esposito: Do we know who owns the car?
Lanie Parish: It was stolen last night from a used car lot. Unfortunately, I can't tell you much right now other than the victim was male. And you see these burnt remnants around his legs, hands, and face?
Kevin Ryan: Duct tape?
Lanie Parish: Yep. Our victim was bound, gagged, and very much alive when the killer lit the fire.
Kevin Ryan: Hell of a way to go.

Kevin Ryan: Killer chose this location for a reason. Vacant buildings on either side, not a security camera in sight. It rained last night, so clearly these tracks were made afterwards.
Javier Esposito: Might be from the killer walking to his getaway car.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. You know, why don't we make impressions of all the shoeprints and tire tracks? Maybe we'll get lucky.

Kevin Ryan: So Caleb was burned alive because LokSat found out that he switched sides and was working with you?
Kate Beckett: Yeah, and now LokSat is going after Vikram, Castle, me; anyone that knows anything about them. So I need you guys to forget everything that you just heard.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, no, afraid we can't do that, boss.
Kate Beckett: You guys, LokSat took out my entire A.G. team. I'm not gonna let that happen to you.
Javier Esposito: And we're not gonna let you go to war without your two best soldiers.
Kate Beckett: Right now, there's no war to be fought. Castle and I are probably gonna have to disappear for a while, at least until we find another lead on LokSat.
Javier Esposito: Beckett, we already have one.
[showing her the crime scene photo]
Javier Esposito: Caleb IDed his killer. LokSat's right hand man. You know what this means?
Kevin Ryan: Catching Caleb's killer will put us on a path to LokSat.

Kate Beckett: [learning of a lead to LokSat] All right, grab your tac gear. We're going to that house.
Kevin Ryan: Excuse me, Beckett. Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't you just tell Castle that you're staying put here at the precinct?
Kate Beckett: You think I'm gonna send you into harm's way while I'm sitting safe behind a desk? No. Not gonna happen.
Javier Esposito: You got a target on your back. We don't. You're staying here.
Kate Beckett: Uh, he does know that I'm captain, right?
Kevin Ryan: Yes, ma'am. You can fire us both for insubordination if you want. Otherwise, we got this.

Javier Esposito: CSU is taking the place apart.
Kate Beckett: They're not gonna find anything. Place was a way station.
Kevin Ryan: You think he planned for us to follow him there?
Kate Beckett: LokSat's people are CIA, which means they are experts at tactical subterfuge. My guess is Mr. Right Hand Man anticipated our ability to track down his vehicle from the crime scene, and he led us to a place where he knew he could lose us.
Javier Esposito: And your guess would be right. Surveillance cameras on the street behind the house were disabled yesterday morning.
Kevin Ryan: So our guy walked right in the front door, walked right out the back.
Kate Beckett: Which means we have no way of knowing where he went.

Javier Esposito: [Castle improvises an escape route from a room with one door] What are you doing? That's the street side. You can't get out.
Richard Castle: We don't have to get out. We can get in. We can escape down there.
Javier Esposito: If we stop shooting, they're coming in.
Kevin Ryan: Don't worry about us. Go get Beckett.

Javier Esposito: How long before the CIA connection comes out?
Kate Beckett: Not long. It's too big a story for the agency to bury.
Kevin Ryan: Get ready for hearings out the wazoo.

Kevin Ryan: Who's LokSat?
Vikram Singh: Caleb left that message for Beckett.
Javier Esposito: You're still not answering the question, Vikram. Who the hell is LokSat?
Vikram Singh: The big bad wolf. The person behind Senator Bracken, Allison Hyde, the hit squads; every terrible thing that's happened to me and Beckett for the past nine months.
[Vikram notices Beckett has entered]
Kate Beckett: You shouldn't have told them.
Javier Esposito: [turning to face her] Yeah. You should've.

Vikram Singh: So, that's it. We're finally in the clear.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, so we're gonna go to a bar and celebrate, yeah?
Kate Beckett: [Ryan and Esposito start to leave] Okay, have fun. So, you handing in your resignation?
Vikram Singh: No. Boring is overrated.
Kevin Ryan: Yo, Vikram, you coming?
Vikram Singh: It's 7:00 in the morning.
Javier Esposito: It's New York City.


"Castle: Hell to Pay (#8.21)" (2016)
Kevin Ryan: Hey, Castle. How ya doin', buddy?
Richard Castle: Well, boys. I looked into the eyes of the devil. So, there's that!
Javier Esposito: Did they check him for concussion?

Javier Esposito: You okay?
Richard Castle: Yeah. You?
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Richard Castle: Good.
Kevin Ryan: You okay?
Richard Castle: Yeah, I'm still good. You?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, I'm okay.
Richard Castle: 'Kay.
Victor Crowne: Now that we know *you're* all good, can someone untie me?

Javier Esposito: [at Peakmore, hearing screams in the distance] Yo, I'd try to escape, too, if I lived here. Who knows what they're doing to him back there?
Richard Castle: Can't be anything worse than what we did historically. Many cultures mistook mental illness for a sign of sorcery. Treatments ranged from, well, prayer to drilling holes in the skull to release the demons.
Kevin Ryan: Definitely a case of the cure being worse than the disease.

Lanie Parish: When I conducted the autopsy, I found that the wound had been inflicted by some kind of talon or claw.
Kevin Ryan: Like an animal?
Lanie Parish: It gets even weirder. There was a strange substance inside the wound.
Richard Castle: Let me guess: sulfur.
Lanie Parish: Yeah, how'd you know?
Richard Castle: Guys, isn't it obvious? Latin prayers, a claw, sulfur, also known as... brimstone?
[Beckett and Esposito both scoff]
Javier Esposito: Come on, Castle.
Kate Beckett: Castle, you don't think that...
Richard Castle: Oh, but I do.
[his tone of voice rising dramatically]
Richard Castle: We all have our demons. But Gabriel was killed by his.

Richard Castle: Ooh, updating the murder board must mean Holmby's alibi checked out?
Kevin Ryan: That it did.
Richard Castle: Yes!
Kevin Ryan: Really?
Richard Castle: Come on. I'm just excited to get off the whole orderly thing and on to the trail of the true killer, which is most likely a road paved to hell, because we all know that's where demons come from.
Kevin Ryan: [sarcastic] Well, I will be sure to cross-reference Shaw's visitor against the list of fallen angels, okay?

Mrs. Kramer: Noah was shocked to think that a man he befriended could've hidden such... evil. Noah thought the work they had done together was a mistake and thought it needed to be buried.
Kevin Ryan: So, do you have anything of Shaw's?
Mrs. Kramer: Oh, no. No, after my husband died, I just couldn't bear going into his office, so I... I hired a company to sell off the furniture and just dump the rest. I told Shaw all of this before he left.
Kevin Ryan: What time was that?
Marshall Kramer: Around 5:00.
Richard Castle: That's still three and a half hours before he met his murderer.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Did he mention anything about where he was going next?
Mrs. Kramer: No, but he said something in Latin before he walked away.
Richard Castle: Do you remember what that was? It could be very important.
Mrs. Kramer: [trying to remember] Mm... "Finis omnium..." I don't know.
Marshall Kramer: Nunc est.
Richard Castle: Finis omnium nunc est.
Richard Castle, Kevin Ryan: "The end is upon us."

Richard Castle: Check this out, you guys. Look at this. Billionaire entrepreneur hellbent on "saving the world" with his water reclamation project? I'm sure.
Kevin Ryan: Castle, by all accounts, Victor Crowne has helped millions of impoverished people by providing them with clean drinking water.
Richard Castle: Or is he infecting us with it?
[Esposito suddenly grabs Castle's wrist]
Richard Castle: Ow!
Javier Esposito: [seeing a bracelet on Castle's wrist] You stole this from the safe to protect yourself? Castle!
Richard Castle: What? You guys have guns.

Javier Esposito: Bro, you have to stop watching these horror films.
Richard Castle: That same slash of light appeared in the crime scene photos, okay? In the exact same place: right across my neck. Now it's showing up again in the video feed? That's live feed! That cannot be manipulated!
Kevin Ryan: Castle, all this stuff about omens and the Antichrist...
Javier Esposito: You being marked for death...
Javier Esposito, Kevin Ryan: It's all in your head.
Richard Castle: Guys...
Javier Esposito, Kevin Ryan: [Ryan and Espo pull him back as a piece of mechanical equipment falls onto the ground from a catwalk] Look out!
Richard Castle: [freaked out] You were saying?

Kevin Ryan: We are interested in this man. Was in here last night?
Oscar von Eckland: [Ryan shows him Shaw's picture] Yeah. Around 6:00. Gabriel something? Was looking for my old man.
Richard Castle: He wanted your father to anoint him with the oil for his spiritual battle.
Oscar von Eckland: How do you know that?
Javier Esposito: Did you anoint him, Oscar?
Oscar von Eckland: For fifty bucks? Hell, yeah I did.
[seeing their expressions]
Oscar von Eckland: What? He was desperate, so I grabbed one of pop's old books, and I... I whipped up a batch of the anointing oil, and I, uh, wrote some bible verses on him. It gave him great peace.
Kevin Ryan: Well, that peace didn't last. The man's dead.
Oscar von Eckland: Really? What happened to him?
Richard Castle: He was murdered... by the spawn of Satan.
Oscar von Eckland: Is he serious?
Javier Esposito: [wearily] Very.


"Castle: The Nose (#8.5)" (2015)
Kevin Ryan: Javi, you okay?
Javier Esposito: No! You shot me in the ass!

Kate Beckett: So that's our victim's car?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Keys were in his pocket. We're just digging into it.
Kate Beckett: Then this wasn't a carjacking.
Javier Esposito: Or a robbery. Victim still had his cash and wallet on him.
Kate Beckett: These are bulletproof windows, huh?
Javier Esposito: That's not the only upgrade. These tires are reinforced run-flat, and there are Kevlar panels in these doors.
Kate Beckett: [opening the passenger door and leaning in to look around] So what do you think? Maybe he was corporate security?
Kevin Ryan: Not with that tiny back seat.
[turning around, Beckett gives him a hard stare]
Kevin Ryan: I mean there's no room for a guy to get in there.
[realizing he's just digging himself into a bigger hole]
Kevin Ryan: Oh. I'm just gonna stop talking.

Kevin Ryan: Do I smell?
Kate Beckett: What?
Kevin Ryan: Our witness is threatening to file a complaint against me for assault with a deadly odor. Says that I smell like soiled baby diapers and Javi's cologne is, quote, "Satan's butt sweat".

Richard Castle: [seeing Esposito limping] What happened?
Javier Esposito: Injured in the line of duty.
Richard Castle: Really? How?
Kevin Ryan: I... accidentally shot him in the gluteus maximus.
Richard Castle: [laughing] In the ass? Well, maybe I should give this to you. I'm sorry, this is so not funny.
Mia Laszlo: [laughing too] You're right. It's hilarious.
Richard Castle: [roaring with laughter] It's hilarious! Come on, Mia, let's make way for, uh, Crack-Shot Ryan and Assposito.

Kate Beckett: You shot your partner.
Hayley Shipton: In the ass.
Kevin Ryan: It was an accident. The hospital says he's gonna be fine. Just needs a few stitches.
Hayley Shipton: And a new pair of trousers.

Kevin Ryan: Hey, Beckett, I got something.
Javier Esposito: *We've* got something.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, that's what I said.
Javier Esposito: That's not what you said.
Kevin Ryan: Okay, it's what I meant.
Kate Beckett: Okay, you both get gold stars for the day if just one of you can tell me what's going on.

Hayley Shipton: The Falcon Unit, it's a private company that specializes in transporting sensitive and, occasionally, illegal items for wealthy clients.
Javier Esposito: So our victim was a transporter. Like the movie?
Kevin Ryan: That explains the armored sports car and secret compartment.
Kate Beckett: So what was in the briefcase?
Hayley Shipton: I'm afraid the answer to that comes with a price. I want in on the investigation.
Kate Beckett: And what's in this for you?
Hayley Shipton: The item in the briefcase has a rather large insurance policy. The insurance company has hired me to recover it.
Kate Beckett: You know, this isn't a treasure hunt. We're trying to solve a homicide.
Hayley Shipton: And your victim was killed for that briefcase. So you find your killer, I find my missing item, everyone goes home happy.

Kevin Ryan: [interrupting an interrogation] It's Castle. He's on the phone. He says he's got a break in the case.
Kate Beckett: What case?
[realizing]
Kate Beckett: This case? How does he even know about this case?


"Castle: Castle, P.I. (#7.11)" (2015)
Kevin Ryan: Victim is Shaina Baker. According to her pay stub, she worked at Eastbourne Preschool. Point of entry is the window in her bedroom. Somebody broke the glass.
Kate Beckett: She would have heard that. And based on her body position, it doesn't look like she was trying to run away.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: No, she wasn't. No signs of defensive wounds or struggle. Just a single gunshot to the chest.
Kate Beckett: Which means our killer was in here when she came home.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: How a woman so astute could *choose* to marry Castle.
Kevin Ryan: Aw, come on, Perlmutter, admit it. You miss him, too.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Please. Just knowing he's not gonna be here makes coming to work sheer bliss. All things considered.

Kate Beckett: Castle, the P.I.'s license doesn't change anything. The D.A.'s still not gonna let you investigate with us.
Richard Castle: Oh, you see, that's the brilliant part. I'm not going to be investigating *with* you. No, instead I'm gonna conduct my own parallel investigation alongside yours.
Javier Esposito: Nice try, but you know that's not gonna fly.
Richard Castle: Actually, it will fly. You see, as a...
[sticking his license into Espo's face]
Richard Castle: ...licensed P.I., I'm legally entitled to investigate this case on behalf of my client.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, so who's your client?
Richard Castle: I'm sorry, that's confidential.
Javier Esposito: I'm sorry, so is this investigation.
[Perlmutter hides the victim's face with his clipboard]
Kate Beckett: I'm afraid he's right. P.I.'s license or not, this crime scene is closed. So you're gonna have to go.
[Esposito points towards the door; seeing they're not going to budge, Castle stands up to leave]
Richard Castle: That's fine. I've already seen everything I need to here anyway. I'll conduct my investigation elsewhere.
Kate Beckett: "Elsewhere" where?
Richard Castle: I'm sorry, that's confidential, too.

Captain Victoria Gates: A private investigator?
Kate Beckett: I swear, sir, I had nothing to do with this.
Captain Victoria Gates: Yet he showed up at your crime scene. Let me remind you, the D.A. was very explicit. Ever since he worked that case for the mob, Mr. Castle can no longer take part in our investigations.
Kate Beckett: He's not. I mean, technically he's conducting his own investigation, and since he's licensed, legally there's not much that I can do to stop him.
Captain Victoria Gates: Okay, detective, but let me be perfectly clear: you cannot help him, either.
[calling out to Ryan and Esposito in the bullpen]
Captain Victoria Gates: And that goes for you, too.
Javier Esposito: [feigning ignorance] I'm sorry?
Captain Victoria Gates: No sharing of information, no granting access, nothing. Or there will be hell to pay. Understood?
Javier Esposito, Kevin Ryan: Yes, sir.
Captain Victoria Gates: Good.
Javier Esposito: [sarcastically quoting Beckett as she approaches] "How much trouble can he be?"

Kevin Ryan: You know what would really suck? If Castle solved this case before we did.
Kate Beckett: And that is not possible.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, but what if he did?
Kate Beckett: Well, then we'd never hear the end of it.
Javier Esposito: Uh, no. *You* would never hear the end of it. You're the one who has to go home to that guy.

Javier Esposito: Why would Shaina be meeting with an attorney?
Kevin Ryan: I don't know, but...
[the timbre of his voice building dramatically like Castle]
Kevin Ryan: ...a high-powered attorney, a secret trip paid for in cash, and a phone call to a news desk. This is starting to smell like conspiracy.
Javier Esposito: I hate to admit it, but baby Castle over here might be right.

Javier Esposito: [discussing Shaina's secret trip to Boston] Why would she be looking at fifteen year old incident reports?
Kevin Ryan: I bet Castle knows.
Javier Esposito: Are you kidding me? There is no way he's ahead of us on this.
Kevin Ryan: Hey, he got to the morgue before us, and that lawyer.
Kate Beckett: Ryan, he is resourceful, but he is not that resourceful.
Kevin Ryan: He got you to marry him, didn't he?

Richard Castle: I know our victim took a trip to Radnor University; I just have no idea why. I hacked into her social media accounts...
Alexis Castle: Wait, you know how to hack into social media accounts?
Richard Castle: "Hacking" might be overstating it. Her password for everything is "Sparkles", her dog's name. Point is without police resources, the best I can do is go through her friend's online posts and look for some connections to Radnor University.
Alexis Castle: Are there any?
Richard Castle: There's one thing, but it happened fifteen years ago. I have no idea if it's even relevant. I just wish I knew what Beckett had.
[his land line rings]
Richard Castle: Richard Castle Investigations.
Kate Beckett: Hey, babe, just checking in. Whatcha doing?
Richard Castle: Oh, just hanging out at the office. How about you?
Kevin Ryan: [with Beckett and Espo at the precinct] He has an office?
[Ryan gets death stares; Castle and Alexis share a look of curiosity]
Kate Beckett: Uh, just wondering how your day's going.
Richard Castle: Good. Really good, actually. How about yours?
Kate Beckett: Yeah, mine's good, too. Uh, really, really good.
Richard Castle: That's good. Great. I should have said great. Mine's great.
[the conversation suddenly takes on an awkward air]
Kate Beckett: Great. That's...
Richard Castle: Okay. So... I'll see you tonight.
Kate Beckett: Uh... see you tonight.
[she hangs up]
Kate Beckett: He knows something.
Alexis Castle: She has something.
Javier Esposito: And you have to find out what.
Richard Castle: And I'm gonna find out what.

Kevin Ryan: How'd it go with Castle last night? Is he ahead of us or behind us?
Kate Beckett: Uh... we're definitely on top of him.


"Castle: Tone Death (#8.9)" (2016)
Kate Beckett: I had a really great time earlier.
Richard Castle: Me too.
Kate Beckett: Is it wrong that I want to kiss you right now?
Richard Castle: So wrong it's right.
Kate Beckett: [seeing Ryan and Esposito approaching] I'm sorry.
Richard Castle: For what?
[as Ryan and Esposito enter the break room, Beckett slaps an unsuspecting Castle, hard]
Kate Beckett: You're a jerk!
Kevin Ryan: [Beckett storms out] Whoa.
Javier Esposito: Hey, bro, you okay?
Richard Castle: [rubbing his face] Yeah. No. Ow! Man, she hits hard.

Richard Castle: Beckett is fine with me riding along.
Javier Esposito: [derisively] Oh, yeah, she's fine with it.
Kevin Ryan: I believe her exact words were "Sure. Maybe we'll get lucky and Castle will get shot."

Javier Esposito: What'd you do?
Richard Castle: Nothing.
Kevin Ryan: You got slapped, Castle. You definitely did something.
Javier Esposito: [accusingly] Or someone. You cheated?
Richard Castle: What? No!
Kevin Ryan: Castle, don't you lie to us. Beckett's our family. You cheat on her, you cheat on us.
Javier Esposito: What's her name?
Richard Castle: Guys, I'm telling you the truth.
[Esposito grabs him and pushes him against the wall]
Richard Castle: Ow! That's my skin!
Javier Esposito: [in a threatening tone] What... is... her... name?
Richard Castle: [unsure if there's a right answer] Svetlana?
Javier Esposito: Svetlana?
Kevin Ryan: [in disgust] Svetlana. What, is she some kind of Russian underwear model?
Richard Castle: Uh, yeah?

Kevin Ryan: Castle told us about...
Javier Esposito: Svetlana.
Kate Beckett: [unaware of Castle's story] He did? He... he... told you about...
Javier Esposito: Svetlana, yeah.
Kevin Ryan: We're so sorry, Beckett.
Javier Esposito: You want we should throw him down a flight of stairs?

Kevin Ryan: Hey, guys, I talked to the country club, and I think I found the woman who threw that party. Her name is Chloe Jarvis, and apparently, she is, like, the Paris Hilton of Long Island.
Richard Castle: You say that like it's a good thing.

Kate Beckett: Hey, where's Castle going?
Javier Esposito: You don't want to know. 'Cause Beckett, you... you don't need him.
Kevin Ryan: And... and look, just so you know, you get us in the breakup, okay?

Richard Castle: Guys, I really appreciate you letting me help out on this one.
Javier Esposito: Well, you know... we'd do anything for Martha.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. We still like her.
Richard Castle: [insulted] Ow!

Richard Castle: Are you saying that because Beckett and I are separated that we can't be friends?
Kevin Ryan: Look... at first, we thought it was just a temporary thing, but... now we know you're dating other people.
Richard Castle: [checking his watch and hurrying away] Oh! That reminds me. I've got to get ready for my hot date with Svetlana. Have fun with that paperwork.


"Castle: Probable Cause (#5.5)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: Tech just finished with Castle's computer. Parts of it had been wiped, just like Tessa's.
Kate Beckett: Were they able to recover anything?
Javier Esposito: They found a file that he had deleted. It was a story concept about how to commit the perfect murder.
Kevin Ryan: Beckett, the character gets away with it by staging a crime scene so bizarre the cops can't see he's hiding right under their noses.
Javier Esposito: It was like a dry run on paper, all the way down to the weird symbol we found on the victim's forehead.
Kevin Ryan: They found something else on his drive. E-mails. Dozens of them. Between Castle and the victim.
Javier Esposito: Beckett... they had been having an affair.

Javier Esposito: I've spent some time in Central. I've seen the Tombs. The way they stack bodies in those cells, if there's a bounty on Castle's head, protective custody ain't gonna do jack.
Kevin Ryan: That's assuming Tyson paid off a prisoner. It could be a guard.
Kate Beckett: So we can't protect him. Not there. We have to stop that transfer. We need evidence that 3XK was involved.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, but we've got nothing to go on.
Kate Beckett: Okay, to pull this off, he needed access to Castle's loft. So get teams over there and tear that place apart. Find me a fingerprint, a hidden microphone, broken window jamb, anything that puts him there.
Kevin Ryan: Tessa was seeing someone. If it wasn't Castle...
Kate Beckett: Then maybe it was Tyson. Hit her office. Look for files, schedules, client lists. There's got to be something that ties back to him.

Kate Beckett: I'm telling you, it's the Triple Killer. Strangulation, misdirects, planting evidence. It's Tyson's M.O.
Captain Victoria Gates: 3XK targeted multiple victims. Always women, never men. So why the change?
Kate Beckett: Revenge. That's the only thing that explains everything.
Captain Victoria Gates: No, not everything. Not that video of Castle.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, actually, it might.
Kevin Ryan: Tyson did something similar in the Russo case. Used a double for the cameras to throw us off.
Kate Beckett: Sir, the D.A.'s already filed charges. They're gonna send him to Central Booking today. We know that we can prove this, we just need more time.

Kate Beckett: What about her e-mails?
Kevin Ryan: Nothing from her mystery lover, so I had them take a look at her hard drive. Turns out portions of it have been surgically wiped, like someone covering their tracks.
Richard Castle: So we're back to square one.
Kate Beckett: Not necessarily. Tessa's roommate said that he gave her some jewelry. Maybe he left a fingerprint on one of those pieces.
Kevin Ryan: I'll head to her place, see what I can find out.
Richard Castle: [Ryan leaves] Jewelry. I never would have thought of that.
Kate Beckett: Well, I guess I'll have to remind you when my birthday's coming up.
Richard Castle: Why, Detective Beckett, was that a hint you just dropped?
Kate Beckett: Why, Mr. Castle, I do believe it was.
Richard Castle: Shameless.

Javier Esposito: Beckett and Castle? Wh... well... when did they start?
Kevin Ryan: I'm not sure, but I know they were together that weekend in the Hamptons.
Javier Esposito: Why wouldn't she tell us?
Kevin Ryan: I guess she was afraid Gates would find out and use NYPD regs to give Castle the boot. I was gonna keep it a secret myself, but under the circumstances...
Javier Esposito: Normally, I'd be happy for them.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Hey, you don't really think that Castle had anything to do with this, do you?
Javier Esposito: No. Come on, man, he's my friend, too. The best thing we can do is try to prove this evidence wrong.

Kate Beckett: [Castle is the prime suspect in a murder] You guys, when you look through Castle's phone records...
Javier Esposito: It's okay. We know.
Kevin Ryan: We won't tell Gates unless we have to.
Kate Beckett: You know? How?
Javier Esposito: [scoffs] I mean, it... it's us, so...
Kevin Ryan: We didn't say anything because we figured it was nobody's business, but we gotta ask... were you with him that night?
Kate Beckett: [as she talks, she realizes he doesn't have an alibi] No, he, uh... I... I was supposed to be. His, uh, mom was out of town, and then he said that he needed... time... to write.

Kate Beckett: It's not easy hanging a body, and she's at least a hundred pounds.
Kevin Ryan: I checked in with CSU. They found prints in the hallway, but the apartment is spotless. Looks like it's been wiped down.
Javier Esposito: This guy cleaned up after himself.
Richard Castle: He didn't mind taking his time.
Kate Beckett: So the killer knew that the roommate was gonna be out of town. What's the security like in this place?
Kevin Ryan: Buzzer on the front door, no doorman or security cameras, but there's no sign of forced entry, no sign of a struggle.
Kate Beckett: She knew him.

Kate Beckett: There's another explanation.
Javier Esposito: Like what?
Kate Beckett: I don't know, okay? It's somebody else. Someone that looks like Castle.
Javier Esposito: We found his fingerprints at the crime scene. We got him on video buying jewelry for our victim. It can't be a coincidence.
Kate Beckett: Javi, what are you saying? That Castle's a killer?
Kevin Ryan: Whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no. None of us are saying that. All he's saying is that if it were anyone else, we'd look into it.
Javier Esposito: We could start by looking at his financials. See if there's any unusual activity around the time of the purchase.
Kate Beckett: [reluctantly] Fine. But we do it quietly, and he never finds out about it.


"Castle: Scared to Death (#5.17)" (2013)
Richard Castle: Legend tells of a mysterious video that can harness the forces of evil from the beyond. The disc is a harbinger of grave misfortune, marking its watchers to certain and unavoidable death. I saw it, just like Val did. That's why she said "it's coming for me". That's how she knew when she was going to die. Why she was trying to ward off spirits. Because of the message on that disc.
Javier Esposito: How's a DVD going to kill you? Is it going to come at you like a ninja star? Cut your head off?
Richard Castle: [Exasperated] The actual DVD will not kill me, Esposito. It will be the spirit inside the DVD. Just like in The Ring.
Kevin Ryan: Ooh, ooh, the one with the creepy, waterlogged little girl that crawls out of the TV. I didn't sleep for days after that movie.

Kevin Ryan: Finding who sent this disc should make Castle feel a whole lot better.
Javier Esposito: Yeah. But what if the worst happens and Castle's right? Do you think he put me in his will?
Kevin Ryan: Dude. Uncool.
Javier Esposito: What? I'm just wondering. I mean, Castle's death will be sad and all, but his Ferrari sure would lessen my grief.
Kevin Ryan: You do realize that even putting that out in the universe is bad karma.

Kevin Ryan: The box was last rented by an Andrew Levine who died of liver failure three months ago. Somehow I don't think he's connected to this case.
Kate Beckett: So the killer covered his tracks. He must have written a random PO Box on the packaging slip.
Kevin Ryan: Or...
Kate Beckett: No. Ryan! There is no or.
Kevin Ryan: I'm just saying, maybe the reason we can't trace the package's origins is because it was sent from another realm.
Javier Esposito: Ryan is right. It was sent from another realm. New Jersey.

Richard Castle: Maybe we should make a copy of the DVD and send it to someone else. That's how they saved people in The Ring.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, but all those people that got a copy died.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, and you'd just be passing the buck off to someone else. That's cold, bro.
Richard Castle: Okay, does anyone have a better solution? Because we need one. If not for me, at least for Beckett.
Kate Beckett: Aw, Castle, that's so sweet. You want me to outlive you?
Richard Castle: Of course. Who else is going to tell my tale of sacrifice and selflessness?

Kate Beckett: Okay, so both of our victims stayed at that inn at the same time. So... maybe they were having an affair.
Kevin Ryan: In 2008 Val would have been... 24. Jason would have been 66 and an affair would have been...
Richard Castle: Gross.
Kevin Ryan: I was going to say unlikely.

Kate Beckett: What'd we get from Val's family and friends?
Kevin Ryan: Just that they hadn't heard from her in the last three days. She wasn't returning any of their messages.
Richard Castle: Three days? That's how long Val's roommate said she'd been acting strangely.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, so I dug into the last seventy-two hours of her life. Besides a credit card charge for a train ticket to Greenwich, there was nothing else unusual.
Kate Beckett: What was she doing in Greenwich?
Kevin Ryan: I'm still looking into that. But as far as abnormalities for the last few days, that was it.
Richard Castle: [looking over Beckett's shoulder at Val's financials] Uh, no, there's more. The wind chime, the horse shoe, the book on urban legends. All bought online two days ago. Almost as if Val thought some kind of evil spirit was coming for her.
Kate Beckett: Castle, what she thought was gonna happen versus what actually happened are two completely different things.

Kate Beckett: Castle, that message wasn't for you. It was a threat for Val, and it wasn't made by spirits, it was made by her murderer. So tracing the disc to whoever sent it should lead us straight to him. Espo?
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Kate Beckett: There's a PO box on this air bill. Would you look into it?
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Kate Beckett: And Ryan, why don't you take a look at this disc and see...
Kevin Ryan: Oh, I'm... I'm sorry, what?
Javier Esposito: Et tu, bro?
Richard Castle: What did you say about the story being a legend?
Kevin Ryan: Um... well, uh... Jenny and I, we are trying to make a baby, so we're abiding by every superstition in the book.
Kate Beckett: Okay, fine. Here, Espo.
Javier Esposito: Uh, nah. I can't... I can't watch that. If I watch that, it's gonna make my partner out to be a wimp. And I can't have that.
Kevin Ryan: Thanks, bro.
Javier Esposito: [they fist bump] Yeah.
Kate Beckett: This is so pathetic. Fine, I will watch it.
Richard Castle: [following her out] Wait, whoa. What are you doing?
Kate Beckett: Castle, I'm doing my job. Someone here has to.

Kevin Ryan: The victims were at the inn, the inn was on the disc. There's gotta be a connection.
Richard Castle: The inn must be the place where some unspeakable horror befell the spirits. Think about it; "The Ring", "Psycho", "The Shining". It's when we get to the creepy old motel that everything starts really going south, so this must be the location of the spirit's origin story.
Kate Beckett: Or somehow Val and Jason connected with the human killer at that inn.
Richard Castle: My version's better.


"Castle: The Third Man (#2.14)" (2010)
Kevin Ryan: [listening to Castle and Beckett run a theory] Do they know they're finishing each other's sentences?

Kevin Ryan: Hey, check this out. Dysons found this in the kitchen. Said it's not theirs.
[Ryan hands over a cell phone, and Beckett scrolls through stored photographs]
Kate Beckett: This is here.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Weird, huh?
Kate Beckett: Why would he take pictures?
Richard Castle: So he could put everything back the way he found it.
Kate Beckett: He was hoping nobody would know he was here.
Richard Castle: Almost as though he was hiding?
Kate Beckett: [handing the phone to Esposito] All right, have a tech pull the memory card. See if any of the deleted photos can tell us who he is.

Javier Esposito: I ran background checks on everyone who knew the family was gonna be out of town. So far, everyone's come back clean, but I'm gonna keep digging.
Kate Beckett: Anything on the canvass?
Kevin Ryan: A whole lot of nothing. No doorman on the building, none of the Dysons' neighbors noticed anything out of the ordinary.
Javier Esposito: Shocker. I've lived in my spot eight years, I couldn't pick my neighbors out of a lineup.
Richard Castle: Well, that's Manhattan for you. Nobody notices anything unless it affects them directly.
Javier Esposito: [teasing him about the Ledger article] Unless it's in the paper.

Richard Castle: What kind of psychopath takes pictures of himself and his murder weapons?
Kate Beckett: Some killers keep trophies.
Kevin Ryan: In his defense, he did delete these photos.
Javier Esposito: .45 with a silencer? Wonder what he had lined up for this.
Kate Beckett: Nothing good. Has CSU pulled the prints off of the camera and personal effects?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. They don't match Doug Bishop and they're not in the system.
Kate Beckett: Which means he doesn't have a record.
Richard Castle: Well, if Doug wasn't our squatter, what was he doing in the Dysons' apartment?
Kate Beckett: He had to known the squatter somehow.
Kevin Ryan: If this squatter was so meticulous about putting things back, why'd he leave all this for us to find?
Richard Castle: You're right. It... it makes no sense.
Kate Beckett: [surprised] What? No grand, theatrical theory to spin for us?
Richard Castle: Honestly, uh... I got nothing.

Javier Esposito: Place is clear.
Kevin Ryan: No gun, no ketamine, no mountain climbing equipment. There is nothing here.
Richard Castle: Yes, there is! An ice box, circa late 1800s. You see, before the invention of modern household refrigeration, people used to keep their perishable items in a box that held ice. Hence... an icebox.
Kate Beckett: It's not an open house, Castle.
Richard Castle: Oh, the Maitlans were very clever. They converted this into a cupboard, meanwhile it's right next to their fridge.
[Castle opens the refrigerator and a dead body falls out]
Richard Castle: AHHHH! I did not expect that.
Kate Beckett: Crescent-shaped scar.
Richard Castle: Looks like there was some truth to Micky's tale, after all.

Kevin Ryan: Why go through so much trouble to get in the Maitlans' apartment?
Kate Beckett: Maybe what they wanted wasn't in the Maitlans' apartment. Maybe they were gonna rob someone else, but just needed access.
Richard Castle: The audio/visual equipment.
[Beckett, Ryan, and Espo all look at him blankly]
Richard Castle: Access?
[drawing on the murder board]
Richard Castle: The Maitlans live on the second floor. Running perpendicular to them, and whatever's below, is the old dumbwaiter shaft. In "Gathering Storm", I had Derrick Storm climb up the dumbwaiter shaft to bypass the Czech assassin in order to save the Swiss ambassador's daughter. Maybe our bad guys are using the dumbwaiter to bypass the security of whatever's below them.
Kate Beckett: Which would explain the ropes and the climbing gear. So what's below the Maitlans' apartment?

Richard Castle: [Beckett is on the phone] Who's Brad?
Javier Esposito: Hmm, must be Lanie's friend.
Richard Castle: You know him?
Javier Esposito: Yeah, met him once. Good guy. Fireman. He was in the FDNY calendar. Chiseled good looks. Rock hard abs. Oh, and get this: once during a fire, after saving the parents, and the kids, he went back in for the puppies.
Richard Castle: Did she just flip her hair?
Javier Esposito: I'm telling you, bro. Puppies. Gets 'em every time.
Kevin Ryan: Puppies.


"Castle: At Close Range (#7.18)" (2015)
Richard Castle: Ryan was working all night, and he texted me.
Kate Beckett: You texted Castle and not me?
Kevin Ryan: Well, when you have a crazy theory, you don't call the voice of reason.

Richard Castle: [after failing to get Ryan to reveal who he is guarding on a security gig that night] That means this goes beyond the pro athlete or reality star. This is someone important. Someone revered. Perhaps... the Pope? The Dalai Lama? Angela Merkel?
Kevin Ryan: My lips are sealed.
Richard Castle: [His voice suddenly high in breathless anticipation] Huh, Ryan! Is it One Direction? You would tell me, right?
[to Esposito as Ryan walks away]
Richard Castle: Are they in town?
Javier Esposito: [Without missing a beat] No, they're in Hong Kong.
Richard Castle: [Calming down] Right.

[first lines]
Richard Castle: [entering the precinct with Beckett, Esposito, and Ryan] Okay, that was interminable. How are fifteen PowerPoint presentations a unique research opportunity? You guys said CrimeStat briefings were fascinating.
Kate Beckett: [snickering] Wait a minute, you guys told him that?
Kevin Ryan: Well, I'm... I'm sure they're fascinating to someone.
Richard Castle: [realization dawns on him] Oh, my... You guys lied to me. I just squandered three hours of my life!

Kevin Ryan: Hey, how's my sister doing?
Frank Kelly: Sleeping easier now that I retired from the force.
Kevin Ryan: You don't miss the job at all? Working vice?
Frank Kelly: Nah. I was dealing with lowlifes every waking minute. Now I'm my own boss. I'm telling you, Kev, security is a better way of life.
Kevin Ryan: I have to say, a lot of guys, when they retire, they just... drift, but you're really making this work.

Kate Beckett: Are you okay?
Kevin Ryan: No, not really. Can we talk later?
Kate Beckett: Uh, no. Kev, this can't wait.
Kevin Ryan: Beckett, I have to work this case.
Kate Beckett: Look, it's a homicide now. I'm at the hospital. Carolyn Decker just died in surgery.

Captain Victoria Gates: You're telling me Eric Chambers is not our shooter? Based on what?
Kevin Ryan: Physics, sir.
Kate Beckett: Congressman Lopez said that when he talked to Carolyn Decker, he saw Chambers by the far wall.
Kevin Ryan: Which is where CSU found his prints.
Richard Castle: And seconds later, our assassin opens fire, three shots.
Kevin Ryan: The first one strikes Lopez beneath the left clavicle.
Kate Beckett: The second one grazes Carolyn Decker's shoulder, and then the third one strikes her in the upper back.
Kevin Ryan: That shot severs her pulmonary artery; she never has a chance.
Captain Victoria Gates: How does any of this lead you to think that Chambers is not the assassin?
Richard Castle: Chambers' vantage point. He had a side-angle view of Lopez and Carolyn Decker.
Kevin Ryan: So how did Chambers manage to shoot Carolyn in the back? The answer is that he couldn't have. Not unless that bullet magically took a hard right turn in midair.
Richard Castle: Which means the shots were fired from the grassy knoll, metaphorically speaking.
Captain Victoria Gates: Detective Beckett, do you actually find any of this plausible?
Kate Beckett: Yes, sir. Plausible enough that I'm getting Ballistics to re-evaluate the crime scene.

Frank Kelly: What am I gonna tell her?
Kevin Ryan: The only thing you can: the truth.
Frank Kelly: I messed everything up. Even with a plea deal, I'm going to jail.
Kevin Ryan: No, you don't know that.
Frank Kelly: Gwen's gonna hate me. For lying, for not being the man I said I was.
Kevin Ryan: She's strong, Frank. Stronger than you think.


"Castle: Secret Santa (#5.9)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: We're putting up the tree the other day, and Jenny says to me "It just doesn't feel like Christmas without kids." She wants to try. But I come to work. I watch the news every day. It seems like the world's falling apart. How am I supposed to bring a kid into that?
Javier Esposito: The world's always falling apart, bro. Since the beginning of time. But having kids, making a family, that's what keeps it together.

Captain Victoria Gates: There's a Manhattan flight carter which doesn't require you to radio in if you stay under 1300 feet. My mother-in-law is a licensed pilot, as she keeps reminding me. Part of a larger effort to make me feel inferior. I'm sorry, did I just say that out loud?
Kevin Ryan: Sounds like she's... staying with you, Captain?
Captain Victoria Gates: One day soon your in-laws will visit too, and when they do, think hotel.
[She walks away]
Captain Victoria Gates: Oh Lord, I hate the holidays.
Richard Castle: Yet another quality she has in common with the Grinch.

Captain Victoria Gates: Remember that class-action suit against SunCove Funding?
Kate Beckett: Yeah.
Captain Victoria Gates: My contact at the SEC dug these up. SunCove's original articles of incorporation, showing the name of the account signatory. Look familiar?
Kate Beckett: James Edmund Smith. The victim.
Richard Castle: Santa is the shark who bilked those people out of their homes?
Captain Victoria Gates: He has more blood on his hands than that. Tim Cabot's father died in a car crash, fell asleep at the wheel working three jobs to pay his inflated mortgage, courtesy of Edmund Smith. That was Christmas Eve five years ago.
Kevin Ryan: The Christmas that Edmund walked out on his life.
Richard Castle: So... it's a tale of redemption. Edmund moves next door to the family whose lives he destroyed, dedicating his life to repairing theirs, never telling them who he really is.
Javier Esposito: But what if Tim found out?
Richard Castle: Then it's a very different tale.

Kevin Ryan: So, I just talked with the family. They didn't see or hear any planes overhead.
Kate Beckett: That doesn't make any sense. He had to have fallen from somewhere.
Richard Castle: I'm sorry, are we overlooking the obvious here? He hit some turbulence, slipped out of his sleigh and fell to his doom.
Kevin Ryan: Santa, lying there dead. I gotta ask you something; what kind of world do we live in?
Kate Beckett: A world in where there is no Santa and people don't fall out of nowhere. Can you check with air traffic control and find out what flights were in the area?
Kevin Ryan: Sure.
[turning to leave]
Kevin Ryan: Bah humbug.

Kevin Ryan: Hey. So, I heard from air traffic control, but you're not gonna like the news. They have no record of anyone flying over the park during the time our guy hit the ground.
Kate Beckett: How is that even possible?
Richard Castle: Santa had his sleigh in stealth mode.

Kate Beckett: Did you find out what Santa job Edmund was doing?
Kevin Ryan: His agency said he wasn't booked on any gigs last night.
Kate Beckett: So then why was he wearing a Santa suit and how did he end up dead?
Richard Castle: Well, if this was a story, it would all come back to Edmund's character; why he became a Santa in the first place.
Javier Esposito: [approaching] Turns out that's a mystery all by itself. I've been looking into this guy, and check it.
[he puts a picture on the murder board]
Javier Esposito: That is Santa five years ago. Meet James Edmund Smith. He was a private equity manager at some big firm.
Kate Beckett: That's the same guy?
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Kate Beckett: What happened?
Richard Castle: Dedication to his craft.
Javier Esposito: Like De Niro in "Raging Bull".

Javier Esposito: [about the victim's dramatic transformation] It's pretty extreme, I know, and I'll tell you this much: he didn't go all Santa for the money. Back in the day, he used to pull down a half a mil a year. As Santa, he made a tenth of that.
Kevin Ryan: Make that much as a Santa? Maybe I should switch jobs, huh?
Javier Esposito: What, gain two hundred pounds and have a bunch of rugrats sitting on your lap with dirty diapers?
Kevin Ryan: [in disgust] Yeah, thanks for that visual.
Javier Esposito: Oh, here's another thing. I pulled Edmund's financials. On the night he was killed, he withdrew two grand from his ATM.
Richard Castle: He didn't have that money on him when we found him. His wallet was empty.
Kate Beckett: All right, take a look at the ATM footage and see if anyone was with him. He might have been robbed.
Richard Castle: Uh, robbed and then launched into space?
Kate Beckett: And how is that less plausible than your sleigh?
Richard Castle: I think you mean less Clausible.


"Castle: The Lives of Others (#5.19)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: Castle. How's the knee?
Richard Castle: It's not the knee so much as the boredom.
Javier Esposito: I thought you writers liked being alone.
Richard Castle: Yeah, if I could write. But the painkillers make me a little loopy. Last night I used the word 'speculate' three times in the same sentence.
Kevin Ryan: [sees a pair of binoculars] Hmm. You must be bored. You've actually gone 'Rear Window'.
Richard Castle: Alexis got me those as a joke to cheer me up. I have not yet resorted to voyeurism.
Kevin Ryan: [Ryan has picked up the binoculars and has trained them on the windows across the street] Then you are missing out.
Javier Esposito: What? Let me see.
[they fight over the binoculars]
Kevin Ryan: No, hey!
Javier Esposito: Give me those!
Kevin Ryan: [Javier claims the binoculars] Dude, she was just about to take off her towel.
Javier Esposito: Oh, the towel's off.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah?
Kate Beckett: [comes up behind them] Unless the body that you're looking at is dead, I suggest you drop those binoculars.

Kate Beckett: Hey, Lanie. What do we got?
Lanie Parish: Sorry, sweetie, it's a bad one. Multiple contusions to the head, evidence of fracturing at the base of the skull. From the pattering, I'd say she was repeatedly struck by that bat.
Javier Esposito: Do we know who she is?
Lanie Parish: The guard who found her IDed her as Clara DeWinter. 35, lives in Queens, and married.
Kate Beckett: What was she doing in this alleyway in the middle of the night?
Lanie Parish: She was an IRS agent. Worked in this building here.
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] Apparently she was working late. The employees sometimes cut across the alley to get to the parking garage next door.
Kate Beckett: Do we have a witness?
Kevin Ryan: No, but we may have something way better.

Charlie Blunt: Look, most IRS agents get threats. It's the nature of our business.
Kevin Ryan: Did Mrs. DeWinter report any recently?
Charlie Blunt: No.
Javier Esposito: Are you sure?
Charlie Blunt: You have to understand, Clara was a rare breed; an IRS agent who actually liked her job.
Kevin Ryan: What's that have to do with her being threatened?
Charlie Blunt: [lowering his voice] The thing is each threat requires an investigation, which is a headache for upstairs. It's an unwritten rule that agents that report threats don't fare well on performance reviews.
Javier Esposito: Well, that unwritten rule may have gotten her killed.

Kate Beckett: Hey, guys. So, tech couldn't get us a better look at the attacker's face, but they're hoping to have an ID on the car by morning. How's it going in here?
Kevin Ryan: Well, Clara's colleagues don't remember her mentioning any explicit threat.
Javier Esposito: But if we're looking for people whose lives are ruined, there's no shortage of suspects. We've got houses that were repossessed, bank accounts that were seized, businesses that were shut down, and we're only a couple of months in.

Kevin Ryan: We went back through all of Clara's records. Turns out that she was hiding something.
Javier Esposito: Over half a million dollars in a secret bank account. She used every legal trick to hide it. Nobody, not even her husband, knew about it.
Kate Beckett: This girl made $75k a year. How'd she get her hands on half a mil?
Kevin Ryan: Well, at first we thought she was shaking down her auditees, but then we traced the deposits.
Javier Esposito: All from businesses owned or affiliated to Tommy Valentino.
Kate Beckett: Tommy "The Shark" Valentino? Why is an IRS agent taking payoffs from a crime boss?
Javier Esposito: I dunno, but wanting to disappear and then getting whacked in an alley, it's all starting to make sense.

Kate Beckett: Tommy the Shark's alibi holds. He was with some "associates" at a nightclub that he owns.
Javier Esposito: Doesn't mean he didn't send of one of his boys.
Kate Beckett: Look, if he killed Clara, he wouldn't have talked to me. No. Hiding the money, planning to disappear; something else is going on here. So what do you got on the husband?
Kevin Ryan: Oh, not much. He's a manager at a big-name supermarket in Queens, no priors, been married seven years. Oh, and he took a million dollar life insurance policy out on his wife only three months ago.
Javier Esposito: [sarcastic] Hmm. That's not suspicious.

Richard Castle: You were all in on it?
Martha Rodgers: Mm-hmm. Michael, Brent, and Emily, my brilliant acting students. I, of course, was the director.
Richard Castle: And the boys?
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Kate Beckett: Oh, yeah. They were great. Except you didn't have to kick down the door.
Javier Esposito: I was in the moment.
Kevin Ryan: We wanted to be convincing.
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Richard Castle: Alexis, you too?
Alexis Castle: It's why I bought you the binoculars.
Richard Castle: Even Captain Gates?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. She jumped at the chance to dress you down for any reason.
Richard Castle: Where is Captain Gates?
Javier Esposito: She couldn't make it.
Richard Castle: Good.


"Castle: After the Storm (#5.1)" (2012)
[at Beckett's apartment, she and Castle hear a knock on the door; Castle assumes it's his mother]
Kate Beckett: Who is it?
Kevin Ryan: Beckett, it's Ryan.
Richard Castle: [relieved] Oh.
Kate Beckett: Hide. Quick, in the closet over there.
Richard Castle: Yeah, I'm not getting in there.
Kate Beckett: Why? I hid in your closet, why can't you hide in mine?
Richard Castle: Why should I?
Kate Beckett: Because...
Kevin Ryan: Beckett, is everything okay?
Kate Beckett: Fine!
[turning back to Castle]
Kate Beckett: Okay, maybe I'm not ready for anyone to know yet. Right now.
Richard Castle: Come on, how's he gonna know?
Kate Beckett: You're here, just like I was there.
Richard Castle: Yes. Yes, the difference being I have my pants on. Or are you embarrassed to be seen with me?
Kate Beckett: Okay, fine. Just act normal. If that's even possible for you.
Richard Castle: It's me.

Kevin Ryan: Do you remember when we were checking banking accounts for the dirty bomb investigation? We used the federal banking database.
Javier Esposito: And I still remember the password.
[a few moments later]
Javier Esposito: I'm not sure they even track accounts going back this far.
Kate Beckett: Whoever owns that account is the person that killed my mom. Run it.
Javier Esposito: [reading the result] The account was closed nineteen years ago. It belonged to a guy named William H. Bracken.
Kate Beckett: [recognizing the name, picking up a re-election flier from the table] You mean Senator William Bracken?

[fearing she's going to do something drastic, Castle, Ryan, and Esposito have followed Beckett to Senator Bracken's fundraiser]
Javier Esposito: Who you calling? Gates?
Kevin Ryan: Um...
Javier Esposito: Put that phone away or I'm gonna break your frigging arm.
Kevin Ryan: Javi, we can't let her throw her life away.
Richard Castle: We don't know she's doing that.
Kevin Ryan: What do you mean? You're the one who said she was gonna kill the guy.
Richard Castle: Hey, I know. Okay, yes, that's right, but... but she hasn't done that yet, right? Look, you make that call, you're labeling her an assassin. That's a bell you can't unring. So let's not make that call, not yet.

Kevin Ryan: I know what this case has done to you. I'm not asking you to jump back in. I just want to show you something, that's all.
[Ryan places a photograph from the Montgomerys' wedding on the table]
Kevin Ryan: We found a copy of the photo Maddox took from the wedding album. You're familiar with the guys that Roy ran with back in the day. Is he one of them?
Kate Beckett: I've never seen him before.
Richard Castle: I have.
[Castle picks up the photograph]
Richard Castle: This is the man I told you about. The one who's been keeping you safe.
Kate Beckett: Are you sure?
Richard Castle: He's older now, but it's definitely him.
Kevin Ryan: Wh... what are we talking about here?
Richard Castle: Whatever information Montgomery gave to him, he's been using it to protect you. But now they've sent Maddox to hunt him down and get it back. If we don't get to him before Maddox does, you'll never be safe again.

Captain Victoria Gates: So, any progress on Beckett's shooter?
Kevin Ryan: We searched the rental car. We still have no idea where he was going or even what his real name was. But we did find out what he stole from Captain Montgomery's house.
Captain Victoria Gates: Montgomery's wedding album? Why did Maddox want this?
Kevin Ryan: I'm guessing he wanted this missing photograph. It's possible he was after whoever was in it.
Captain Victoria Gates: Have you been able to track it down?
Kevin Ryan: Well, I've got Evelyn Montgomery bringing the negatives in, but truth is I'm a one-man band here. I could use a few more investigators.
Captain Victoria Gates: Well, you can take it up with the Vice President. I've already lost half my people to his security detail, and about to lose the rest to traffic control. So for right now, you're on your own.

Captain Victoria Gates: So let me see if I understand. As luck would have it, you three were in the neighborhood taking a walk.
Richard Castle: Well, many people consider that the best form of exercise. It's low-impact, it has...
[seeing Gates' expression he trails off]
Captain Victoria Gates: Then you heard an explosion and as concerned private citizens, you rushed inside to check it out.
Kate Beckett: Yeah. That's right.
Captain Victoria Gates: Is that how you remember it?
Javier Esposito: Yes, sir.
Richard Castle: Captain Gates, I can personally vouch...
Captain Victoria Gates: I am not interested, Mr. Castle, as you specialize in fiction. Let's say you happened to be in the area. How do you explain the fact that Maddox, the killer we're searching for, and the man who shot you last year, is the one lying there dead?
Richard Castle: Bad karma.
[Esposito nudges him to shut up]
Captain Victoria Gates: Detective Ryan, do you know anything about this?
Kevin Ryan: Just that it appears the safe was rigged to blow when Maddox opened it.
Captain Victoria Gates: And what was in that safe?
Kevin Ryan: Hard to say. Papers of some kind.
[he shares a covert look with Beckett, who smirks to herself]
Captain Victoria Gates: And I don't supposed you know what was in those papers, and why Maddox was here?
Kate Beckett: Like I said, we were just walking by.

Kate Beckett: We were so close. That file would have told us who's at the center of this and who killed my mom.
Javier Esposito: Well, at least Maddox won't be coming after you.
Kate Beckett: They'll just send somebody else.
Richard Castle: Unless whoever's behind all this doesn't know the file's been destroyed. Maybe he thinks it's still in play.
Kate Beckett: I wouldn't bet on that. Would you?
Javier Esposito: [hearing the creak of a floorboard in the hallway] Shh.
[he and Beckett approach the front door with their guns drawn]
Kevin Ryan: [as the door opens, he reaches for his own gun] Whoa! You want to put that thing away?
Javier Esposito: Well, if it isn't Judas.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, okay, pal. Want to give it a break?
Kate Beckett: Guys, come on.
Javier Esposito: What are you doing here?
Kevin Ryan: [entering the apartment, he shows Beckett an evidence baggie] I came to bring you this.
Kate Beckett: Paper from the safe?


"Castle: Murder He Wrote (#5.4)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: Hey, Castle. Yeah, I'm gonna put you on speakerphone so you can weigh in on this.
Richard Castle: [with Beckett] Weigh in on what?
Kevin Ryan: Well, we're in the morgue with Lanie trying to figure out who Beckett's boyfriend is.
[Beckett looks at the phone, alarmed]
Lanie Parish: I have nothing to do with this nonsense.
Richard Castle: Yeah, until you're bagging their mangled bodies when Beckett finds out.
[Beckett smiles]
Javier Esposito: [scoffs] Pfft. Like we're afraid of Beckett.
Kevin Ryan: Besides, how's she gonna find out?
[Beckett grabs for the phone to chew them out, but Castle beats her to the punch]
Richard Castle: Anyway... I need your guys' help.

Aaron Lerner: Just last week, Franklin was complaining about a local.
Kevin Ryan: A local drug dealer?
Aaron Lerner: Yes! Seems he didn't appreciate us moving in on his business.
Kevin Ryan: Who? Give me a name.
Aaron Lerner: I don't know a name. But Franklin seemed really spooked.
Kevin Ryan: What else did he tell you about him?
Aaron Lerner: That's all I know. Everything else I told to Brady and his two consultants.
Kevin Ryan: Two consultants?
Aaron Lerner: Yeah, yeah! The writer, Castle, and his girlfriend.
Kevin Ryan: Girlfriend? Wha... wha... what do you mean girlfriend?
Aaron Lerner: What does that matter?
Kevin Ryan: Hey! Hey! I'll ask the questions here, pal! Are you telling me that Richard Castle brought his girlfriend in your interrogation?
Aaron Lerner: [after a look and a shrug from his lawyer] Yeah.
Kevin Ryan: What was her name?
Aaron Lerner: I don't remember.
Kevin Ryan: Well, then describe her.
[Ryan slams the tabletop]
Kevin Ryan: Describe her, Lerner! Now!
Aaron Lerner: Okay! Tall! Uh... uh... medium length hair. What's this about?
Kevin Ryan: What... what color? Give me a hair color.
Aaron Lerner: Uh... brown. Brown, brown eyes, too, I think. Really pretty.
Kevin Ryan: Body type?
Aaron Lerner: Awesome. I mean *awesome*. She was like... thin, gorgeous. She was hot. She was really hot. Kate! Name was Kate!
Kevin Ryan: [stunned] Son of a...!

Richard Castle: There has been a homicide out here in the Hamptons, in my back yard.
Kevin Ryan: Seriously, Castle? What, are you in an episode of "Murder, She Wrote"?
Richard Castle: More like murder he wrote. But unfortunately, unlike Jessica Fletcher, the local police chief, not a friend of mine. And I think he may have the wrong guy. So I need you guys to question the victim's wife in the city, find out what she knows.
Kevin Ryan: Hmm...
Javier Esposito: That's a pretty big favor to ask, Castle. We're gonna need something in return.
Richard Castle: The Ferrari.
Kevin Ryan: For a week.
Javier Esposito: Each.
Richard Castle: Seriously? Guys.
Kevin Ryan: [smirking] Hmm.
Richard Castle: Guys.

Javier Esposito: Hey, did you hear about Beckett's weekend?
Richard Castle: [feigning ignorance] No. Big plans?
Kevin Ryan: She's going away with her boyfriend.
Richard Castle: A boyfriend? Beckett! Really? Who is the lucky guy?
Javier Esposito: For some reason, she's not telling.
Kate Beckett: Okay, seriously, guys?
Richard Castle: Actually, I for one am offended that you're not sharing with us.
Kevin Ryan: Hmm. After all we've been through.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, I think we deserve better than that.
Kate Beckett: You know, I have a couple of ideas about what you guys deserve.

Lanie Parish: Beckett's boyfriend? Don't you two have something better to do?
Javier Esposito: Actually, no.
Kevin Ryan: We figure Beckett must have started up with the guy during her suspension.
Javier Esposito: Pretty emotional time for her. Bet she needed a shoulder to lean on.
Kevin Ryan: An ex.
Javier Esposito: It would explain why she's too embarrassed to tell us who it is. Makes her look weak.
Kevin Ryan: We're thinking the most likely scenario is that it was the last guy that she was with.
Javier Esposito: Dr. Joshua Davidson. It's him, isn't it?
Lanie Parish: Okay. I get that you don't have a life, Javi, but you're married, Kevin, so what's your excuse?
Kevin Ryan: I...
Lanie Parish: Whoever Beckett's boyfriend is is none of your business.
Javier Esposito: Come on, Lanie. You must know who it is. She went back to Josh, didn't she?
Lanie Parish: Is this how you interrogate people? 'Cause you ain't doing nothing but pissing me off.

Kevin Ryan: So, I took a closer look at Randall Franklin's real estate investments. Guy was buying up distressed properties in dying neighborhoods and turning them into condos.
Javier Esposito: Sounds like smart investments.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, but he wasn't renovating them. He wasn't leasing them out, nothing.
Javier Esposito: So he was carrying the mortgage but the buildings weren't throwing off any income?
Kevin Ryan: And his wife said that the real estate investments are keeping them flush. It just doesn't add up.
Javier Esposito: You're right. There has to be something going on in those buildings.
Kevin Ryan: Only one way to find out.

Kevin Ryan: You were right, Castle. Franklin was using his helicopter to move meth to the Hamptons. Looks like you blew this case wide open. Guess you can get back to your writing now, huh?
Richard Castle: Well, there's still the matter of finding out who the killer is.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, well, I think Brady knows what he has to do. I already told him to look for a local drug dealer who had been feeling squeezed by Franklin's expanding operation.
Richard Castle: Wow, that's a great theory. Nice work.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, thanks, but it's not my theory. Aaron Lerner gave it up when I interrogated him this morning.
[Beckett hurries into the room, a look of horror on her face]
Richard Castle: Aaron Lerner? Aar... uh... so you interrogated Aaron Lerner, too.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. He's back in the city. Turns out he was Franklin's partner in crime.
Richard Castle: Wow. What do you know?
Kate Beckett: [quietly] Castle...
[the mutter back and forth quietly]
Kevin Ryan: You still there, Castle?
Richard Castle: Yeah. Still here. Uh, what else did Aaron Lerner say? Did he say anything else about... anything else?
Kevin Ryan: Oh, you know, usual. "I didn't do it", "you got the wrong guy". I'm pretty sure he told me everything he knows.
Kate Beckett: [horrified, quietly] Everything?
Richard Castle: Everything, huh? That's good.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Good luck with the writing.


"Castle: The Human Factor (#5.23)" (2013)
Jared Stack: The facial recognition system is scanning footage over the last two hours from all the main departure points.
Javier Esposito: How accurate is this thin really?
Jared Stack: Well, if he passed in front of one of those cameras it'll spot him.
Kevin Ryan: Man, talk about Big Brother. There's got to be a way to beat the system though, right?
Jared Stack: Wear big sunglasses, let your bangs hang down over your forehead. It totally messes with the software.
Javier Esposito: What if you don't have bangs?
Jared Stack: Wear heavy makeup. Paint random colored shapes all over your face.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, I'm not doing that.

Kevin Ryan: So, um, CSU sent this over. Based on what little they had, they were able to piece together where the explosion originated.
Richard Castle: I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say the explosion originated in the car.

Kate Beckett: What's your name?
Jared Stack: Does it matter? It's not like we're gonna get to know each other.
Kate Beckett: Who had Dale Tanner killed? Were you a part of it? Or was your job just to clean up the mess?
Jared Stack: You're tenacious. I respect that.
Kate Beckett: Was Omar Dixon part of the mess?
Jared Stack: He went into hiding. By the way, how did you manage to draw him out?
Kate Beckett: I'll be asking the questions.
Jared Stack: You just won't be getting the answers.
Kate Beckett: We'll see. I can keep you for twenty-four hours, and I fully intend to do so.
Jared Stack: You have me for five more seconds. Use them well.
[Beckett doesn't respond; five seconds later, there is a knock on the door]
Kevin Ryan: Beckett? You've got a phone call.
Jared Stack: Time's up.

Kevin Ryan: Look, Sean, I know that law enforcement hasn't always been on your guys' side.
Sean Tanner: Try never.
Kevin Ryan: But we're not the feds, Sean. We're the guys trying to solve your dad's murder. And no matter what you think, we're not gonna stop until that job is done.

Kate Beckett: [the feds have seized all of the case evidence] We're been played. They just met with us to find out where everything was and what we knew, and then they grabbed all the evidence.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, and now we have no proof that a drone strike ever happened.
Richard Castle: Well, we're no closer to figuring out why it happened or who did it.
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] Well, maybe Tanner's partner can tell us.
Kate Beckett: Do you know who it is?
Kevin Ryan: Turns out Tanner taught law classes at Eastborough College to make ends meet, and his colleagues said they remember seeing a former student named Omar Dixon hanging around. I talked to Omar's girlfriend; she said that he did work for Tanner, but it was all hush-hush what he did.
Kate Beckett: And where's Omar now?
Kevin Ryan: The girlfriend said she has no idea, but Sean Tanner might. He attends Eastborough, too. Used to drop by and see his dad. Maybe he knows Omar.
Richard Castle: Oh, I think he does. Remember what he did when you asked if he knew his dad's partner?
Kate Beckett: He changed the subject.
Richard Castle: Boom.

Kevin Ryan: Why is it so hard to believe? People hack into banks all the time. The Pentagon, NASA.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, but a drone? Maybe the pilot was just pretending that he wasn't flying.
Kate Beckett: No. No, you can't fake that kind of panic.
Richard Castle: I agree. He was having a pant-soiling moment, but there is one possibility we are neglecting. The drone itself. It's rise of the machines, not unlike SkyNet in "The Terminator". The machines have achieved consciousness, and they are pissed.

Javier Esposito: Yo, check it. Warburg posted a video just before he went into hiding.
Simon Warburg: [on the video] People don't understand why I tampered with the drone software.
Richard Castle: That's Warburg? I was expecting...
Kevin Ryan: Dr. Evil?
Richard Castle: Well, someone a little less nerdy.


"Castle: After Hours (#5.8)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: Unis on the canvass got a hit on Chumson's Tavern. Bartender there, Jerry Jenkins, says he knows about the murder but will only speak to a detective.
Kate Beckett: Okay, Castle and I will talk to him. You guys chat with the nun.
Kevin Ryan: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a second. We're interviewing a nun?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. And I'm gonna be the good cop, you're gonna be the bad cop.

Kevin Ryan: Nun walks into a precinct. It's like the beginning of a bad joke.
Javier Esposito: [Ryan begins preening himself to make himself presentable] Want to borrow a comb or something?
Kevin Ryan: Shut up.
Javier Esposito: You know what this reminds me of? Watching one of those body switching movies where the guy looks like a grown man but he's actually twelve.
Kevin Ryan: Hey! Let me tell you something. Catholic school is like combat. Unless you've been there, you don't know.
Javier Esposito: Uh... I have been there, in combat. And it's way worse than some old lady.

Javier Esposito: Sister Mary, we have a few questions for you about Father McMurtry.
Kevin Ryan: That is if you're up for it, Sister Mary.
Sister Mary: I can tell you anything you need to know about the Father, including who murdered him.
Javier Esposito: You know who killed him?
Sister Mary: Isn't that what I just said? I was afraid their friendship would end badly, but the Father was so trusting. Always trying to save lost souls; even souls as black as that man's.
Kevin Ryan: What man, Sister Mary?
Sister Mary: Michael Dolan.
Javier Esposito: This is Mickey Dolan? The mobster? The enforcer for the O'Reilly family?
Sister Mary: The very same. He and Dolan grew up together. I... I tried to warn him, but he always believed he could set Mr. Dolan on a better path. He died believing it.

Kevin Ryan: If they were friends, why do you think that Dolan killed him?
Sister Mary: They had a terrible fight outside the church two days ago. I don't know what it was about, but the Father was very upset afterwards. Very upset.
Javier Esposito: Well, a fight alone doesn't prove...
Sister Mary: [sternly] I wasn't finished.
Javier Esposito: Of course. I'm... I'm sorry.
[Ryan smirks]

Kevin Ryan: So the nun was right. Father McMurtry did fight with Mickey Dolan. Surveillance cam footage outside the church backs Sister Mary's story. Not that I'd ever doubt a nun.

Javier Esposito: Hey, cap, we've got a problem.
Captain Victoria Gates: Okay. What's your problem?
Kevin Ryan: We tried to send Dolan's mugshot, but we can't reach Beckett or Castle.
Javier Esposito: We called their phones, Beckett's radio, even called Castle's mom.
Captain Victoria Gates: Did you ping her cruiser?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. GPS shows it's heading down the Jersey turnpike.
Captain Victoria Gates: Ryan, have troopers intercept that car. Oh, and Esposito, go to that witness's address. Find out what the hell's going on.


"Castle: Still (#5.22)" (2013)
Kate Beckett: Castle, listen... thank you for staying with me.
Richard Castle: Always.
[they lean in to kiss, but sirens announcing Captain Gates' arrival stop them]
Richard Castle: [to Ryan as they hug] Perfect timing.
Det.Kevin Ryan: Definitely.
Det. Javier Esposito: You good?
Kate Beckett: Yeah... did she see it?
Det. Javier Esposito: No.
Captain Victoria Gates: Glad to see you, Detective. Even you, Mr. Castle. I have to say, I don't know too many men who would've done what you did.
Kate Beckett: Neither do I.
Captain Victoria Gates: Oh, for Heaven's sake Detective, just kiss the man!
[Esposito looks shocked]
Kate Beckett: Sir, you know?
Captain Victoria Gates: What? Do you think I'm an idiot? I needed to maintain plausible deniability, which I can continue, as long as you two both act professionally at the precinct.
Richard Castle: I know I can, but Captain, she has a long history of coming on to me at work...
Kate Beckett: I don't think it'll be a problem, sir.
Captain Victoria Gates: Good. Meanwhile, as long as we're on neutral ground here, I'd say, uh, he deserves it, don't you?
Kate Beckett: Yes, sir.

Det.Kevin Ryan: William. The kid's name is William.
Richard Castle: Seven letters.
[thinks]
Richard Castle: Billy.
Det.Kevin Ryan: Or... Willy.
Det. Javier Esposito: What kind of mother's gonna call her kid Willy unless she wants his ass kicked every day at the playground?

Kate Beckett: That? Castle, that was called survival. We were just huddling for warmth.
Richard Castle: Cuddling?
Kate Beckett: Huddling!
Richard Castle: Or... one could see it as small part of a larger pattern. Unwanted touching in the workplace.
Kate Beckett: Oh, so you're being harassed, is that it?
Richard Castle: Yeah, you're very lucky. A less understanding man would press charges with all the... inappropriate things you've said to me.
Kate Beckett: Really? Like what?
[flashback]
Richard Castle: Oh, jeez! How do you even get in that position?
Det.Kevin Ryan: Right? It's not even possible.
Kate Beckett: Oh, it's possible.
[new flashback]
Kate Beckett: [teaching Castle to shoot] Okay, gauntlet your right fist in your left palm.
Richard Castle: Whoa! Shot too soon.
Kate Beckett: You know, we could always just cuddle, Castle.
[new flashback]
Richard Castle: Did you just use the word "veritable"?
Kate Beckett: Yes, I did.
Richard Castle: Sexy.
Kate Beckett: You should hear me say "fallacious".
[new flashback]
Kate Beckett: Closest I ever came to taking an art class was posing for one as a model.
Richard Castle: Wait. Posing in?
Kate Beckett: Not a stitch.

Det. Javier Esposito: [on the phone with Beckett and Castle] Seriously? Who liked who first?
Kate Beckett: That's right. Who was into whom first, me or Castle?
Det. Javier Esposito: You do realize that I'm busy trying to save your life?
Kate Beckett: Just answer the question, Espo, and don't be afraid to hurt his feelings.
Richard Castle: And don't forget about how jealous she got that time we worked that case at my ex-girlfriend's wedding.
Kate Beckett: Or how jealous he got when I was with Demming.
Richard Castle: Or before that, how jealous she got about me and my ex-wife.
Det.Kevin Ryan: [approaching Esposito] Who're you talking to?
Kate Beckett: Or remember when you wrote that...
Det. Javier Esposito: [covering the mouthpiece] It's Castle and Beckett. I think they're starting to crack. Check it out.
[Esposito puts the call on speakerphone]
Richard Castle: Or how jealous about me and Serena Kaye, or Sophia from the CIA. Oh, Agent Shaw from the FBI.
Det.Kevin Ryan: Yeah, wow. Totally losing it.

Captain Victoria Gates: BDU just confirmed it - Beckett's standing on a bomb. Trace detection estimates ten kilograms of RDX. Enough to take out the whole building.
Det. Javier Esposito: So what's the plan?
Det.Kevin Ryan: [Gates doesn't respond] Sir, tell me there's a plan.
Captain Victoria Gates: They're working on it.

Det.Kevin Ryan: Car's license plate was registered to Archibald Fosse. Lives alone in a fourth floor apartment. This isn't his first rodeo, either. Got in trouble playing the ponies, so he took out his bookie with a car bomb six years ago.
Kate Beckett: Six years and he's already out?
Det.Kevin Ryan: Well, he was supposed to do twenty years to life, but his case got overturned on appeal three months ago.
Richard Castle: Any idea about the motivation for last night's bombing?
Det.Kevin Ryan: I dunno. We just IDed him twenty minutes ago. There's a lot we have to learn about him yet.


"Castle: Fidelis Ad Mortem (#8.15)" (2016)
Kevin Ryan: Got a hit on the fingerprint match. Our victim's name is Daniel Bardot. He's a recruit officer at the NYPD academy.
Javier Esposito: He's one of us.

Javier Esposito: [arriving at the police academy] Bad flashbacks, bro?
Kevin Ryan: Push-ups were the answer to everything around this place. Police work is more than just strength and endurance. It's about intellectual rigor.
Kate Beckett: Oh, come on, you guys. It wasn't all that bad here.
Kevin Ryan: [looking in a nearby trophy case] Says the academy all-star. Oh, look. Recruit officer Beckett.
Javier Esposito: Ah!
Kevin Ryan: Recruit officer Beckett. Ah. Recruit officer Beckett.

Javier Esposito: Beckett's not here. She's at the police academy working a high-profile murder. One of the recruit officers was killed.
Richard Castle: That's a little close to home. These the suspects?
Javier Esposito: Yeah, and three more recruits just alibied out.
Richard Castle: Your victim was killed by a fellow recruit?
Javier Esposito: Appears so. And word is these four were watching the fights at a local boxing gym at the time of the murder, but that alibi's soft.
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] Hey. Just spoke with Liz from Vice. The boxing gym is a notorious hot spot for illegal steroids. Rumor has it is that one of the trainers was dealing to a cop at the academy.
Richard Castle: So the victim, Bardot, stumbled onto a dirty cop.
Kevin Ryan: Well, that would explain the threatening note. "Dead men tell no tales."
Richard Castle: But Bardot wouldn't back down, so the cop kills him.

Javier Esposito: [cornering a suspect] Where you running to, recruit?
[the recruit turns to run away, but runs into a hockey check from Ryan]
Kevin Ryan: You don't want to miss the rest of the captain's lecture, do you? Turn over.

Javier Esposito: We got the murder weapon. Dumpster diver found it buried in a bag of garbage. The gun was wiped clean, but not the rounds in the magazine. Check this out. The prints are a match to Bardot's.
Kevin Ryan: If Bardot loaded it, then he had to have been the one who stole it from the academy. So he was shot with his own gun?
Javier Esposito: Question is what was he doing with it out there in the first place?

Kevin Ryan: The murder weapon is missing from the weapons cage assigned to Bardot's company, Company 38.
Javier Esposito: Lock on the CCTV security closet was jimmied open. Someone killed the cameras in the weapons room between 7:00 and 7:35 last night.
Deputy Commissioner Malone: At that hour, it's mainly recruits who are left in the building. All faculty resides off-campus. And only members of Company 38 have access to that weapons cage.
Kate Beckett: So our killer is one of Bardot's fellow recruits. Fourteen suspects who eat, drink, and sleep police training and techniques, who have spent months learning how we catch killers, which makes them uniquely equipped to plan a murder. So we are gonna have to use every trick in the book to uncover who killed Daniel Bardot.


"Castle: Backstabber (#8.18)" (2016)
Kevin Ryan: Hayley.
Javier Esposito: What happened? Did you lose a bet and now Castle gets to drag you everywhere he goes?
Richard Castle: [sarcastic laugh] Quite the contrary. Hayley actually wanted to watch me solve yet another murder.
Kevin Ryan: You mean help solve. You help.
Javier Esposito: Yeah. Remember, bro, you cannot solve a homicide without us.
Kevin Ryan: But we sure as hell can solve one without you.
Hayley Shipton: Really? Because on the ride over here, Rick was bragging about how the NYPD can't close a case.
Richard Castle: [trying to laugh it off] Eh, those were just jokes that... out of context, it's not as funny. I was rolling my eyes when I said it.
[to Hayley]
Richard Castle: Thank you for stabbing me in the back.

Richard Castle: [discussing the victim] I'm guess from his outfit he wasn't an employee?
Javier Esposito: Most likely he's some kind of thief.
Kevin Ryan: Pretty good one at that. None of the security was tripped, all the cameras were shut down.
Richard Castle: Was anything stolen?
Kevin Ryan: What's there to steal? I mean, this is an energy company office building. The only thing of value are the furniture and the computers.
Hayley Shipton: [to Lanie] May I?
Javier Esposito: Clearly, we're helpless. So come on, Castle, please, solve this case for us.
Richard Castle: Well, the only thing we know for sure is...
Hayley Shipton: [inspecting the body] He was killed at 3:27 a.m.
Lanie Parish: Very good, Hayley.
Richard Castle: Whoa, wait. What? How did you know that?
Hayley Shipton: Broken watch. He must have busted it when he hit the ground.
Kevin Ryan: [sarcastic] Esposito, we have Hayley. What do we need Castle for?

Javier Esposito: Looks like somebody caught Marcus in the act and killed him.
Richard Castle: Or perhaps Marcus had a partner.
Hayley Shipton: Partner?
Richard Castle: Well, Marcus is a burglar. He would be on high alert. The only reason he'd let someone behind him is if he trusted that person; i.e., a partner. We find the person Marcus broke in here with, we find his killer.
Kevin Ryan: Very good, Castle.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
Richard Castle: Why are you acting surprised?

Richard Castle: Hello, gentlemen.
Kevin Ryan: Ooh. Castle, you shouldn't show your face around here right now.
Javier Esposito: Yeah. Beckett's pissed.
Richard Castle: Uh, guys, it was a dream.
Kevin Ryan: Well, dreams are doorways to the subconscious, Castle.
Javier Esposito: Yeah. And what you did was just so... wrong.
Richard Castle: She told you what I did? What did I do?
Javier Esposito: Well, we're sworn to secrecy, bro.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Unlike some, we would never do that to Beckett.
Richard Castle: It was a dream.
Kevin Ryan: Well, dream or not, you did something in real life, and Beckett's subconscious is picking up on it.
Javier Esposito: You need to figure out what that was and come clean before it's too late.

Kate Beckett: Hey, Ryan, Ned here wants to revise his statement.
Kevin Ryan: Awesome. Had a little accident? Don't touch anything, please.
Kate Beckett: Uh, excuse me, Hayley. Where are you going?
Richard Castle: Hey, guys, is there a problem here?
Kate Beckett: Hayley waterboarded Ned.
Hayley Shipton: I did no such thing. It was more of a swirly.

Alexis Castle: Dad, Hayley's gone.
Richard Castle: Gone where?
Alexis Castle: I don't know, but she ditched her cell phone. I can't track her.
Richard Castle: Hang on. I'm putting you on speaker. What was the last thing Hayley did before she disappeared?
Alexis Castle: She discovered the computer worm was one she helped design years ago.
Richard Castle: So Edgar used Hayley's own code to help frame her.
Kevin Ryan: But why did she take off right when she was closing in?
Kate Beckett: Because she knows who the killer is, and his name isn't Edgar. I did some research on her dead MI6 partner, Wesley Connors, and I found this article from six years ago.
Richard Castle: Wait a minute. Wesley Connors is the man in the brown leather jacket.
Kate Beckett: I knew he looked familiar.
Javier Esposito: This article says he's been executed.
Alexis Castle: Guys, when Hayley recognized the code, she looked like she'd just seen a ghost.
Richard Castle: That's because she did. Wesley Connors is still alive.


"Castle: A Deadly Affair (#3.1)" (2010)
[seeing a cardboard cutout of Castle in a bookstore window]
Kevin Ryan: He really is ruggedly handsome.

Kate Beckett: [Castle was discovered at a crime scene with a gun in his hands] So you, being the expert veteran of dozens of crime scenes, decided to pick up the murder weapon to what, ensure that we had your prints?
Richard Castle: Maybe you missed the part where I said she was shot dead. When I heard the noises coming from the next room, I thought whoever killed her was coming back. So I picked up the gun to defend myself. It seemed like a very good idea at the time. That's when you, Esposito, and Annie Oakley come bursting through the door.
Captain Roy Montgomery: [in the observation room with Ryan and Esposito] Annie Oakley?
Kevin Ryan: I... kind of almost shot Castle.
[seeing Montgomery's look]
Kevin Ryan: What? He had a gun.

[at his desk, Ryan is trying to balance an egg on its tip; as Beckett walks by, it falls on the floor and breaks]
Kate Beckett: Are you guys re-enacting the Humpty Dumpty crime scene?
Kevin Ryan: It's the autumnal equinox today.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, and according to Mr. Wizard there, it's the only time of year you can balance an egg on its tip.
Kate Beckett: Don't you guys have work to do?
Javier Esposito: Nah.
Kevin Ryan: No, not really.
Kate Beckett: [tossing a folder onto Ryan's desk] Hmm. Well, now you do.
[Beckett nonverbally tells Ryan to clean the egg mess up, then heads to her own desk]
Kate Beckett: By the way, that whole thing with the egg is just urban legend.
Kevin Ryan: Not true. I saw Castle do it last year.
Javier Esposito: [seeing Ryan has hit a nerve, Espo slaps his head] What's wrong with you?

Javier Esposito: [re: Castle] Still no word from him?
Kate Beckett: No.
Kevin Ryan: Maybe you should call him.
Kate Beckett: He said that he would be back in the fall, and it's fall, so clearly he has better things to do.

Kevin Ryan: [at the crime scene outside a bookstore] Hey, it's Castle!
[seeing Castle approaching, they realize it's just the store owner carrying a cardboard cutout of Castle holding "Naked Heat"]
Kevin Ryan: I guess he did finish that book.
Lanie Parish: [sarcastic] Nice of him to send us a copy.
[the store owner puts a cardboard poster of Castle up in the window reading "Meet the author this Friday at 7 PM"]
Kevin Ryan: Looks like he's back in town.
Javier Esposito: [also sarcastic] Nice of him to call.
Kate Beckett: All right, guys, you can stop pining for your girlfriend. After all, we got a body full of holes.

Kevin Ryan: Hey, bad news. According to the banks, our victims' deposits were made in cash. There's no way to trace the payments. And since the deposits were less than $10,000, there was no report made to the IRS.
Kate Beckett: Which means that our victims were most likely involved in something illegal.
Richard Castle: Just so you know, I got that from "shot to death".
Kevin Ryan: So?
[to Beckett]
Kevin Ryan: So... what illegal activity involves vending machines, an artist, and a high school teacher?
Richard Castle: I know. Even the stuff I'm making up in my head doesn't make sense.


"Castle: The Mistress Always Spanks Twice (#2.16)" (2010)
Richard Castle: The psychology doesn't make any sense. The crime scene was pretty elaborately staged, which seems to suggest a significant amount of premeditation, but the murder itself, strangulation, might indicate a crime of passion.
Kevin Ryan: The guy covered her in caramel. Do you really think we're gonna find a logical explanation?
Kate Beckett: Only a handful of bondage shops in the city do custom work, so let's take photos of those cuffs, send it out, see if anyone can ID where it came from.
Richard Castle: [Ryan and Esposito leave] "Only a handful of shops"? Okay, what aren't you telling me?
Kate Beckett: So much, Castle. So very, very much.

Kevin Ryan: Vic's a female, late twenties. No ID. She was found hanging from the monkey bars by a jogger just after dawn.
Richard Castle: Is that honey?
Lanie Parish: From the smell of it, I'd say it's caramel sauce. But I'll be testing, not tasting.
Kate Beckett: Caramel sauce?
Richard Castle: Maybe our killer has a sweet tooth.
Kate Beckett: Give her state of undress, I'd say it's more likely he had a sexual fetish.
Lanie Parish: Yeah. I can do the chocolate, I'll even do the whipped cream bikini, but caramel? I prefer slippery to sticky.
Richard Castle: [to Ryan and Beckett] Does she know we can hear her?

Kevin Ryan: [searching a bondage website for leads] It's a little creepy doing this with you breathing on my neck.
Javier Esposito: Oh, sorry, bro. I'd do it on mine, but IA checks browser history, so...
Kevin Ryan: [sarcastically] Great. Thanks.
Javier Esposito: What does that thing do?
Kevin Ryan: Looks like a potato peeler.
[Ryan clicks an icon on the screen]
Javier Esposito: Oh, that is nasty.
Richard Castle: [entering, glancing at the screen] And illegal in twelve states.

Kevin Ryan: [still looking at the bondage website] How do you even get in that position?
Javier Esposito: I don't know, but you should try that with your girlfriend, honey milk. As a matter of fact, I'm going to buy this for you right now.
Richard Castle: [walking over to look] Oh, jeez! How do you even get in that position?
Kevin Ryan: Right? It's not even possible.
Kate Beckett: [glancing at the screen] Oh, it's possible.

Kevin Ryan: [ending a phone call] So, that was Barry from the Love Shackle. He says the cuff might be theirs, but he'd have to examine them closely to know for sure.
Kate Beckett: Well, then have Evidence pull them and tell them I'm coming.
Richard Castle: [as Beckett leaves] Oh, field trip trip to a sex store.
[whispering to Ryan and Espositio]
Richard Castle: I love this case.

Kevin Ryan: Hey. We tried to trace the creepy calls that Jessica was getting at her office, but since they were routed through the main switchboard at the college, there's no way to determine their source.
Kate Beckett: What about the cell phone?
Javier Esposito: The day she died, she placed a call to her boyfriend at the hospital, she placed a call to her voicemail at the office, and she placed two calls to Lady Irena's House of Pain.
Kate Beckett: Lady Irena's House of Pain. That must be where Mistress Venom works. Did you get an address?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. An office building on 38th.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, conveniently located for all your lunchtime spanking needs.
Kate Beckett: All right, you guys look through her notes, see if there's anything that's there that might implicate one of her clients. Meanwhile, Castle and I will go and meet this Mistress Venom.
Richard Castle: Whips, women, and murder. Sounds like my lucky day!


"Castle: Always (#4.23)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: We're just thankful no one was hurt.
Evelyn Montgomery: Believe me, so am I. Ever since Roy died, I've slept with his .357 in the nightstand.
Kate Beckett: So it was just the one guy?
Evelyn Montgomery: As far as I know. He was taking files out of the cabinet. He had Roy's old laptop in his backpack. When he saw me, he pulled his weapon, so God help me, I shot him. I think I hit him in his shoulder. He fired back, and then he crashed through the window.
Kate Beckett: [showing Evelyn a picture of the victim] Evelyn, was this the guy?
Evelyn Montgomery: Yeah. That's him.
Richard Castle: I'm glad Evan and the girls weren't home.
Evelyn Montgomery: Funny thing is, I wasn't supposed to be home, either. It's almost like he knew we weren't supposed to be here.

Kate Beckett: [getting pulled out of an interrogation] Book him on the drugs and weapons charge, and tell the DA I'm gonna want to file for murder one.
Javier Esposito: It wasn't him.
Kate Beckett: What do you mean it wasn't him?
Javier Esposito: The skin tissue that Lanie managed to scrape from underneath our victim's fingernails, the lab was able to pull DNA. We ran it against Vincente, it's not a match. In fact, it wasn't a match to anyone in the system.
Kevin Ryan: But it did match DNA trace evidence from another crime scene.
Richard Castle: Well, at least that's something. What was the crime scene?
Javier Esposito: It was a shooting.
Kevin Ryan: Beckett, it was your shooting.
Javier Esposito: DNA confirms that the man who killed Orlando Costas in that alley is the same man who put a bullet in your heart.

Kate Beckett: [having identified her shooter] All right, you stay on grid. Let us know if he moves. Esposito, you're coming with me.
Kevin Ryan: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing? You want to do this, you do it right. You put a team on that car and you bring backup with you.
Kate Beckett: Ryan, this whole thing started because of a group of corrupt cops. How do you know there aren't more out there? We're about an inch away from catching this guy, and I'm not gonna blow it by advertising our next move.
Kevin Ryan: With all due respect, this guy put a bullet in your heart and then he disappeared into the ether. You cannot go in there unprepared.
Kate Beckett: Unprepared? I've been preparing for this for the past thirteen years.

Kevin Ryan: He's a thief. Orlando Costas. Couple of domestic B&Es, but suspected of a dozen more. He used to run with the Cazadores.
Richard Castle: Cazadores?
Kevin Ryan: They're a violent street gang that deals in drugs, arms, and larceny, but all of Orlando's priors are back when he was a teenager. He hasn't been arrested in years
Richard Castle: Maybe he got back in the game.
Kevin Ryan: I don't know. He went a long way to clean up his act. Did four years active in the military, discharged with honors last year. Spent his rotation as an MP in Germany.
Richard Castle: Military police? He really did clean up his act.
Kate Beckett: If this guy went straight, then how did he end up dead in an alley?

Javier Esposito: [locating the victim's car] Two blocks away from the alley, blood smeared on the armrest. This is definitely it.
Richard Castle: He was shot somewhere else and then he came here? Why not go home? Why not go get patched up?
Kate Beckett: He was meeting someone in that alleyway.
Javier Esposito: Phone. His last call was 4:47 a.m., just before he died.
Kate Beckett: Run that number.
Javier Esposito: Right.
Kevin Ryan: Hey, Beckett. Gun. It's a .38. Recently fired.
Richard Castle: So it was a shootout. That's how he got the shoulder wound.
Kate Beckett: Which means wherever he came from, there might be another body.
Javier Esposito: [looking at the car's GPS] I know where he was coming from.
Richard Castle: Where?
Javier Esposito: His last entry was 299 1st Avenue.
Richard Castle: What... what's at 299 1st Ave.?
Kate Beckett: Captain Montgomery's house.

[deleted scene]
Kate Beckett: If this guy went straight, then how did he end up dead in an alley? And that still doesn't explain that second gunshot or the missing bag.
Richard Castle: Well, since I'm in the middle of resurrecting Derrick Storm, all my theories have massive military conspiracies in them.
Kevin Ryan: You know what I don't get? How can you bring back Derrick Storm when he's dead?
Richard Castle: Because I have magical, god-like powers. And a daughter going to college. Do you have any idea what that costs nowadays?
Kevin Ryan: I was just beginning to accept his death.
Kate Beckett: You guys, non-fictional murder case?
Kevin Ryan: Sorry.
Richard Castle: Unprofessional.


"Castle: Dead Red (#8.11)" (2016)
Kevin Ryan: So, our vic is a Russian national. Name of, uh...
Kate Beckett: Grigory Mishkin. I spoke to the police commissioner. He's the son of a consulate officer, which means this might get political.
Kevin Ryan: [sarcastic] Oh, great.

Kevin Ryan: Castle. Bearing gifts, I see.
Richard Castle: This is your starter kit for little Kevin. Except for the Macallan 25 and the earplugs. Those are for you.
Kevin Ryan: You're a dear and thoughtful man.
Richard Castle: I know.

Vasiliy Zhirov: [after Ryan and Esposito question a suspect] The suspect is leaving.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, cases don't always get solved as quickly as they do in Castle's books.

Javier Esposito: You know if Vasily recognized this guy?
Kevin Ryan: I don't think so.
Richard Castle: Why do you ask?
Javier Esposito: Because Frank's real name is Anatoly Arkady, and he's a defector from Russia from back in the Cold War. And...
[he leads them into Beckett's office and closes the door]
Javier Esposito: ...Grigory's mom, Anya, is a spy.
Richard Castle: Really?
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Richard Castle: Wow, that is so cool.
[seeing Beckett's expression]
Richard Castle: Bad. It's obviously bad.

Richard Castle: A defector resurfaces, a spy dies, and her son is killed in the middle of the night. This novel writes itself.
Kevin Ryan: Tell us what happens next.
Richard Castle: I have no idea. That's what makes it so good.
Kate Beckett: Frank, AKA Anatoly, is the key to figuring out what's behind these murders, so you guys dig into his life and see what you can find.
Javier Esposito: What do you want us to do about Vasily?
Kate Beckett: We got to keep him as far away from this case as possible, which means we need to launch Operation Nickel Tour.
Richard Castle: Right. What's that?
Kate Beckett: You're gonna take him sightseeing.


"Castle: Need to Know (#6.3)" (2013)
Richard Castle: A washed up sitcom star hanging from a hook? Does it get any better?
Kevin Ryan: I grew up watching this show. Charlie Reynolds is highly underrated as an actor. "2 Cool For School" is a timeless gem.
Javier Esposito: Uh, I seriously doubt that.
[Beat]
Javier Esposito: Not that I ever watched it.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Mr. Castle! You're back. But not by popular demand.
Richard Castle: Nice to see you too, Perlmutter.
Kevin Ryan: Do you have a time of death for us?
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Uh, between 7PM and 2AM. The cause is obvious. He plummeted off the roof and landed on the hook.
Javier Esposito: Possible suicide.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Based on the crane's distance from the building and signs of struggle on the roof, he was pushed.

Richard Castle: [watching Beckett and McCord] Maybe we should go over there and just invite them in for some coffee, you know?
Javier Esposito: We are not serving them coffee. You bought this espresso machine for the NYPD. This is NYPD coffee only.
Richard Castle: Come on, guys. That's a little harsh.
Kevin Ryan: Harsh? Beckett's a Judas. Her and her partner just hijacked our case.
[suspicious]
Kevin Ryan: Whose side are you on?
Richard Castle: Your side. Guys, I'm... I'm on your side.
Javier Esposito: Hey Ryan, isn't it a little weird that Castle shows up the same day that Agent Beckett takes over?
Kevin Ryan: Yes, it's quite a coincidence.
[they corner Castle]
Richard Castle: No, that's not... that's not a coincidence. That's... yeah, well. No, actually yes, it's a coincidence.
Javier Esposito: Maybe you and Beckett are in on this together. Maybe you are her inside man. You are Judas's Judas.

Javier Esposito: If we knew the feds' angle, we'd have a leg up on solving this.
Richard Castle: Sorry, guys, I've yet to come up with a crazy, genius theory yet.
[Castle notices Ryan and Esposito have stopped walking]
Kevin Ryan: You don't need to. Not when you can go directly to the source.
Javier Esposito: Get Beckett to give us the lowdown.
Richard Castle: Okay, wait a minute...
Kevin Ryan: We get much-needed case information, you get to clear up any... lingering doubts about your loyalty. Everybody wins.
Richard Castle: Okay, guys, no, I can't do that, all right? After D.C., we promised that we wouldn't...
Javier Esposito: We did you a solid getting you on this case, Castle. It's time to pay up.
Richard Castle: Guys, this is my fiancee, okay? What does it say about our future if I keep pushing the boundaries?
Kevin Ryan: Castle, your whole relationship is built on a foundation of your boundary pushing.
Richard Castle: [reluctantly giving in] Good point.

Kevin Ryan: I can't believe Charlie was spying on Anton Renkov and his organization. Any of them look familiar?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. I saw about three of those Russians on the movie set.
Kevin Ryan: Mm-hmm.
Grant 'Sully' Sullivan: And according to Interpol, all of them got criminal records back in the motherland. Assault, murder, all kinds of bad stuff.
Kevin Ryan: I bet one of them found out that Charlie was a spy and they killed him.
Kate Beckett: [approaching] Especially since we know that Carlie was followed to the warehouse.
Kevin Ryan: Based on what?
Kate Beckett: We tracked Charlie's movements by triangulating the cell towers that his phone pinged off. And then we used that time stamp to pull satellite footage of the warehouse. How'd you guys get there?
Javier Esposito: [brightly] Chicken poop.
Kate Beckett: Oh. Well, whatever works.

Richard Castle: So, listen, I'm, uh... I'm sorry about that whole bribe thing. I should have known you were incorruptible.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, I wouldn't say that.
Richard Castle: Oh. Well, then allow me to try and corrupt you a little later at my place, where we can finally have some alone time. And by "alone time", I mean you and me and my mother and Alexis and... Pi.
Kate Beckett: That... that sounds... crowded.
Richard Castle: Yeah.
Kate Beckett: You know what? Why don't you just give me a call after you guys have solved the case?
Richard Castle: Well, didn't you hear McCord? Case is wrapped.
Kate Beckett: [handing him a flash drive] Is it?
[cut to Beckett and McCord leaving]
Kevin Ryan: This whole "greater good" thing blows. Charlie died serving his country. He deserves justice.
Javier Esposito: What happened to Beckett? She used to understand that.
Richard Castle: [approaching and showing them the flash drive] I think she still does.


"Castle: Kick the Ballistics (#4.4)" (2011)
Richard Castle: You know, Ryan, none of this is your fault. The fact that he used your gun...
Kevin Ryan: That weapon was issued to me by the City of New York. I let it out of my hand and now a girl is dead. So please do not tell me that it's not my fault.

Kevin Ryan: When I started in Narcotics, I was so green. I-I didn't know how things got done. One day, there's this major bust - street gang cooking meth. They're stacking up guys in the bullpen, taking their statements one by one. Place is a zoo. I'm answering phones in the squad. Girl on the line, name of Alisha, asking for my lieutenant. So I call out across the bullpen "Hey lou, Alisha's on the phone for you."
[Beckett laughs]
Kevin Ryan: It was her tip that got these guys nailed, and all of them just heard me call out her name. Searched all day and all night, looking for her before the gang could get word back to the street that she was a narc.
Kate Beckett: Well, did you find her?
Kevin Ryan: I did. Got her into witness protection, but... that was the stupidest thing I'd ever done as a cop. Until the day Jerry Tyson got the drop on me and stole my weapon.

Javier Esposito: [Beckett has interrupted an interrogation] My man Finn, inches from confessing.
[seeing Beckett in a huff]
Javier Esposito: What?
Kevin Ryan: What's going on?
Kate Beckett: Ballistics just came in. The bullet that killed Jane Herzfeld is from a gun that's in our system. It's a Glock 17.
Javier Esposito: That's good news.
Kate Beckett: Ryan, it's a match to your old service weapon.
Kevin Ryan: That can't be right.
Kate Beckett: It's not a mistake. The weapon that killed Jane Herzfeld... it's yours.

Richard Castle: I was just thinking... if our killer is someone in Lee's organization, then he must have gotten your gun from Jerry Tyson.
Kevin Ryan: Which means our killer may know Tyson's whereabouts. We nail him, we nail 3XK.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, but there's nothing in Tyson's background that indicates a connection to the Chinese mob.
Richard Castle: Maybe the shooter is connected to the Lees. Someone Tyson crossed paths with during his four years in prison. Someone working for the Tong. If I find out who that someone is, maybe we have our shooter.
Kate Beckett: Wading through four years of prison records, it's a lot of work.
Richard Castle: I don't mind.

[after Ryan approached Ben Lee undercover as a college student, using Esposito to distract Lee's bodyguard]
Kate Beckett: What the hell were you two thinking, going to see Ben Lee when Gates specifically said "stay away"?
Javier Esposito: Who's gonna tell her, Beckett? Not me. Ryan, are you planning on telling the captain what we did?
Kevin Ryan: Not me. Castle?
Richard Castle: [taking a photo of Ryan and Espo in their outlandish getups] Who, me? No way.
Kate Beckett: Nice, smartass. And what about when Ben Lee talks to his dad and Gates gets a phone call from their lawyer? You two are gonna get benched.
Kevin Ryan: Ben Lee's not gonna tell his father.
Kate Beckett: How do you know?
Kevin Ryan: Because I looked him in the eye and I saw the pain he's in. Maybe he's not man enough to stand up for himself, but he's not gonna rat me out, either.


"Castle: Number One Fan (#6.4)" (2013)
Lanie Parish: Girl, what are you doing here?
Kate Beckett: Uh... Captain Gates said that I could come.
Lanie Parish: That's not what I meant. Shouldn't you be off looking at wedding venues or something?
Kate Beckett: No, we haven't even set a date. We're just trying to enjoy our engagement. Why is everyone trying to rush us?
Kevin Ryan: Think you're being rushed now, wait until after the wedding. Not ten minutes from the altar, they'll all be like "When are you two having a baby?".
Javier Esposito: Bro, your wife's hormonal because she's pregnant. What's your excuse?

Kevin Ryan: She shot you in the chest and you still think she's innocent?
Richard Castle: No. She shot me in the chest and now I know she's innocent.

Richard Castle: [fondly looking at his Kevlar vest] Wow. And to think you boys mocked me when I had this made four years ago. I think I'll have it framed.
Kevin Ryan: Hey, what does it say about your writing when your number one fan tries to kill you?
Richard Castle: That was an accident.
Javier Esposito: Been one inch higher, it would've been a tragedy.
Richard Castle: But on the bright side, your autographed copies of "Deadly Heat" would be worth way more.
Kate Beckett: [approaching] Not funny, Castle.
Richard Castle: Little bit funny.

Javier Esposito: You know, Beckett, despite your fiancé's near death, today was fun.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. We miss working with you.
Kate Beckett: Good.
[she smiles and holds up her badge]
Kate Beckett: 'Cause I'm back.

Raymond Vance: All of this is circumstantial. I mean, what could possibly be my motive?
Kevin Ryan: Oh, your father-in-law helped us out with that one. Your law firm represents the Stokeses. Now, you knew that they were about to transfer a majority of their wealth into a trust for their daughter, your wife.
Javier Esposito: And you don't want some Little Orphan Annie coming around making a claim for half.
Kevin Ryan: That's when you decided to kill the one man who knew the truth, and frame it on the unknowing heir.
Javier Esposito: There's just one thing that we're not so sure about.
Kevin Ryan: You gonna make a deal and plead to murder, or you gonna take your chances in court?
Javier Esposito: Do lawyers have lawyers?


"Castle: Under Fire (#6.11)" (2014)
Kevin Ryan: Can you believe it? Me as a dad.
Kate Beckett: No, Ryan, you're gonna be great.
Richard Castle: You guys pick a name?
Kevin Ryan: No, we couldn't agree on one, so we're waiting to see if it's a boy or girl and then decide.
Richard Castle: May I suggest... Cosmo?
Kevin Ryan: No, you may not. And rather than pick a name for my kid, you should pick a date for your wedding.
Richard Castle: Pick a date for my wedding? I was planning on bringing her.
Kate Beckett: [sarcastic] Really? When is that? I might have plans.

Kevin Ryan: This is Lieutenant Delia Burton. She's a fire investigator with FDNY. Detective Beckett, Mr. Castle.
Kate Beckett: Nice to meet you. So this was arson?
Lt. Delia Burton: Well, it's looking that way. I found miniscule traces of accelerant at the flashpoint.
Richard Castle: So the killer set the fire to cover up the murder?
Lt. Delia Burton: Except there's no accelerant on the body, and the fire's flashpoint is deep in the building. You know, normally when you're disposing of a body, you're gonna make sure it burns.
Kate Beckett: So maybe our victim surprised the arsonist.
Richard Castle: And the arsonist killed him, silencing him as a witness?
Lt. Delia Burton: That's how it looks to me. Then again, homicide's not my specialty.
Kate Beckett: No. Uh, but fire is. Would you mind keeping me in the loop in case you find anything else?
Lt. Delia Burton: Sure. As soon as I know what happened, so will you.
[the building creaks]
Richard Castle: Whoa. What was that?
Lt. Delia Burton: The building. You guys should probably go.
Richard Castle: [turning and hurrying away] Sounds good. See ya!
Kate Beckett: [embarrassed] I'm marrying him.

[unsure if the're going to escape a burning building, Ryan wants to name his child after Esposito]
Javier Esposito: "Javier"? You're gonna name a white Irish kid "Javier"?
Kevin Ryan: What? You're gonna bust on me now for being sentimental?
Javier Esposito: Figure it's my last chance.
[they share a laugh]
Kevin Ryan: No. No, no. We're getting out of here. There's a way out and we're gonna find it. I'm not leaving Jenny. I'm not leaving my baby without a dad.

Kevin Ryan: [trapped inside a burning building, while Jenny is nearing labor] I'm sorry, I... I know I promised, but I'm not gonna be there.
Jenny Ryan: Don't say that. Please don't say that
Kevin Ryan: I'm sorry. I love you more than anything. Remember that. Always remember that.

Jenny Ryan: We need a name, for the baby. We need to do that together.
Kevin Ryan: If it's a boy... Javier.
Jenny Ryan: And if it's a girl?
Kevin Ryan: Sara Grace, after your grandmother.
Jenny Ryan: I love you so much, Kevin. I love you.


"Castle: Knockdown (#3.13)" (2011)
Captain Roy Montgomery: [after Beckett compromises her objectivity] As of this moment, you two are running point on Raglan's homicide.
Javier Esposito: Uh... Captain, my partner and I don't wish to be insubordinate.
Kevin Ryan: But we respectfully decline the assignment.
Captain Roy Montgomery: What does it say on my badge?
Javier Esposito: "Captain".
Captain Roy Montgomery: Now read the fine print. It says get your ass out there and solve Raglan's murder, before I bust you both back down to Traffic.
Javier Esposito, Kevin Ryan: Yes, sir.
Captain Roy Montgomery: You want to help her? Find that shooter. Solve the damn case.

Kathy Moore: So the guy that touched my arm was a murderer? Figures... why do I attract all the creeps? I dated this one guy Craig for like two months, and I thought like he was the one. And I called him up one night and his roommate answered the phone and told me that Craig had died. And I was like devastated. And me and his roommate scattered his ashes throughout Central Park, the whole thing, and I worked through the stages of grief with my life coach - and a lot of random guys - and I was getting into acceptance when I ran into Craig at a bar. He had faked his own death.
Kevin Ryan: Unbelievable.
Kathy Moore: I know Ryan, all he had to do was say that he didn't want us to date anymore. It's not like I'm some psycho.

Hal Lockwood: I want to congratulate you both. I don't know how you found my place. But I've been doing this kind of work for a while now, and no one's ever come that close to me. My problem is that your investigation has gone further than I expected. And now, in order for me to finish my job, I need to know exactly what you know about me and my employer. Now, I've got a lot of respect for you guys. What? I do. Now, I'm gonna make you a deal. You tell me what I need to know, one pro to another, and I will put a bullet in your brain. You don't, you jerk me around, and you will be begging me to before this night is up.
[Ryan and Esposito look at each other]
Javier Esposito: I'm gonna have to go with option "B".
Kevin Ryan: Oh, yeah. We're definitely gonna jerk you around.

Kate Beckett: [reading Vulcan Simmons' jacket] Assault, attempted murder, extortion, possession with intent, witness intimidation. Then it looks like it just dries up. Nobody's booked him in years.
Richard Castle: So what does that mean? He found religion?
Javier Esposito: It means he got smart. Swimming in deeper waters.
Kevin Ryan: Guess he's come a long way since Washington Heights.
Kate Beckett: Wait, what? You said Washington Heights?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, back in the day, Simmons used to run the drug trade in Washington Heights.
Kate Beckett: My mom and a group of her colleagues, they put together this campaign called Take Back the Neighborhood. They were trying to get drug dealers off the streets in Washington Heights.
Kevin Ryan: With Simmons running all the dope in that neighborhood, that campaign would've cost him. That hitman, Coonan, we know he that he was into dope. Maybe that's how Simmons got in contact with him.
Richard Castle: So Simmons hires Coonan to kill them all, including your mother, and pays his old friend Raglan to write off their homicides as random gang violence. There would've been no way to trace the murders back to him.
Kate Beckett: Until Raglan threatens to reveal his role in the conspiracy and Simmons has him silenced.
Javier Esposito: We'll have him in the box before lunch.


"Castle: Always Buy Retail (#1.6)" (2009)
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: [Castle after mentioning having sex with his ex-wife and comparing her moving back to New York to] A deep-fried Twinkie?
Richard Castle: Yeah, the guilty pleasure that you know is bad for you, so you only do it once, maybe twice a year for the novelty. But the deep-fried Twinkie everyday is...
[Beckett stops him from continuing]
Kate Beckett: Castle!

[the detectives and Castle are looking at a corpse whose body was evidently prepared according to some ritual]
Richard Castle: It's Vodou.
Javier Esposito: Vodou? What is that? Some kind of Star Trek thing?
[He grins mockingly]
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: No, dude, it's a religion. Practiced primarily in West Africa.
[When the others look at him]
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: What? I read, too!
Richard Castle: The, uh, blood on the bone? Most likely animal. Part of the ceremony. The pouch is an offering to the spirits; but I don't recognize this symbol.
Javier Esposito: If you did, you'd be a suspect. So how do you know about all this?
Richard Castle: Research for my sixth Derek Storm novel.
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Unholy Storm.
Richard Castle: Yes. Thank you. And, uh, Vodou's not just limited to West Africa. It's also practiced by Haitian and Dominican communities right here in New York.

NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Why would a guy mark his own stall with the death symbol?
Richard Castle: He wouldn't. This symbol was meant for him. Charles Oni's been marked for death.

[while on the phone with Meredith, Castle saw the murder suspect drive by in his car]
Kate Beckett: What do you mean you didn't get the plate?
Richard Castle: Uh... there was a... it was coming...
Javier Esposito: What kind of car was it?
Richard Castle: Uh, it was big. It was an SUV, I think.
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: You think? What about the color?
Richard Castle: Uh, black. Dark blue. Uh... it's very hard being a witness. I don't know how you guys ever get a conviction.


"Castle: A Murder Is Forever (#6.8)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: She was like the dog whisperer for CEO's.
Javier Esposito: [Skeptical] You really buy that.
Kevin Ryan: Well, yeah. Skimmed through her book. Think there might be something to her theory. For instance, she said that in every relationship, there needs to be a masculine energy and a feminine energy. Even in ours.
Javier Esposito: Oh. Well. We know which one you are.
Kevin Ryan: I don't know about you, but I'm very comfortable in my masculinity.
Javier Esposito: You do realize you're wearing a sweater vest, right?

Kevin Ryan: I spoke to the guys in Robbery, and at the FBI. No one has reported a diamond like this stolen. Not just recently. Ever.
Captain Victoria Gates: Then where did it come from?
Kate Beckett: And if it was stolen then why haven't the owners reported it?
Richard Castle: What if it's because they couldn't afford to?
[He theorizes as the music builds dramatically]
Richard Castle: Because the diamond has some kind of sordid past. Perhaps it's like the Hope diamond. It's cursed. Or, maybe it's an occult gem of great power. Smuggled out of Nazi Germany shoved up somebody's...
Captain Victoria Gates: Thank you, Mr. Castle!

Kevin Ryan: [leading Caskett to the crime scene] Speaking of animal nature, you should see the inside of her car.
Kate Beckett: Oh, wow.
Kevin Ryan: It's been completely torn apart.
Lanie Parish: And from the spatter pattern, it looks like all of this was done after she was killed.
Richard Castle: So they killed her, then they killed her car.

Captain Victoria Gates: [the diamond the victim was hiding has been appraised at $60 million] Six zero, like with another six zeros after that?
Kevin Ryan: That would be 60 million, yes.


"Castle: Target (#5.15)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: Hasim Farouk is a Saudi national living here as a student.
Richard Castle: Majoring in what? Urban warfare?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, undeclared, actually. Up at Columbia.
[Castle does a double take]
Kate Beckett: So what was he doing in lower Manhattan?
Richard Castle: More importantly, what is Columbia doing admitting gun toting lunatics and are there any more of them?
[Takes out his phone]
Richard Castle: For the record, I'm not calling to check on Alexis. I'm just checking my email.

Richard Castle: Hasim was surveilling her apartment and he was nearby when she was kidnapped, but why? What was their relationship?
Kevin Ryan: Well, Sara's roommate's coming in. Maybe she has an answer. There were no phone calls between them. It's looking more like he was stalking her. Not only did he wiretap her place, he was also taking two classes that she was in.
Richard Castle: Maybe it's like "The Conversation".
Kevin Ryan: I'm sorry, I don't...
Richard Castle: Francis Ford Coppola.
Kate Beckett: Gene Hackman. Very underrated.
Richard Castle: Thank you. Um... in it, a surveillance expert overhears a plot against the woman he's bugging. Maybe Hasim got wind of the kidnapping, tried to thwart it, and paid with his life.
Kate Beckett: Eh, that still doesn't explain the guns in his apartment.
Richard Castle: True. Gene Hackman did not possess an arsenal.

Javier Esposito: [watching Castle leave the precinct] How's he doing?
Kevin Ryan: It's Alexis. He's got to wrecked. Hell, I'm wrecked.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, well, we got to put all of that aside and help him find her. Where are we on the van?
Javier Esposito: We've been working the traffic cam footage and we made some headway.
Kevin Ryan: After the van left lower Manhattan, we picked it up on East River Drive heading toward the Queens-Midtown Tunnel.
Kate Beckett: We've got to figure out where that van went. Let's bring in some more bodies to review the footage. We find the van, we'll find Alexis.

Kate Beckett: What do you got?
Javier Esposito: Well, the van exited the Queens to Midtown tunnel to Greenpoint. Took Greenpoint Ave to McGuiness, then went west on Huron.
Kate Beckett: Then where'd the van go?
Kevin Ryan: Well, we're not sure. But this area right here, it's pretty much boxed in by Greenpoint Ave, McGuiness, and Franklin.
Javier Esposito: We checked the video feeds from those streets. The van went into that neighborhood but never came out.
Kevin Ryan: The girls have to be somewhere in there, along with Henson.
Kate Beckett: Okay, so how big is our search zone?
Javier Esposito: Twenty square blocks.
Kate Beckett: Okay. Coordinate with feds and Queens PD. We need to do a street by street search for that van. Plainclothes and unmarked cars only.


"Castle: The Blue Butterfly (#4.14)" (2012)
Luella McManus: Stan's dead? Well that's just great, what am I supposed to do with all his crap?
Kevin Ryan: We'll be taking... some of it off your hands as part of our investigation.

Kevin Ryan: When was the last time you saw him?
Luella McManus: Oh, this morning. Stan was all smiles: gave notice he was moving out 'cause his ship was comin' in.
Kevin Ryan: What ship?
Luella McManus: Oh, I dunno, the Titanic from the looks of things.
Javier Esposito: [Handing McManus a business card] Well if you can remember anything else can you give me a call?
Luella McManus: [Turns and leaves without taking the card] Don't hold your breath, hot shot.
Kevin Ryan: [to Esposito] I think she likes you.

Kevin Ryan: The boss wants to see you boyo.

[believing the current murder is connected to a murder from the '40s, Castle is reading an old witness statement]
Kevin Ryan: What happens next?
Richard Castle: I don't know. That's the end of the statement.
Kevin Ryan: But if Sally wasn't Vera's sister, then who was she?
Richard Castle: [excited] I don't know.
Kevin Ryan: What was Sally up to?
Richard Castle: [even more excited] I don't know.
Kevin Ryan: Do you think she was connected to Dempsey?
Richard Castle: [even more excited] I don't know. Isn't this great?


"Castle: Dead Again (#8.19)" (2016)
Kevin Ryan: Any idea how our boy Alan is still with us?
Kate Beckett: Uh, no. But Castle has a theory.
Richard Castle: [cut to Alan's hospital room] You are a superhero.
Alan Masters: No, I'm really not. I'm just an ordinary guy.
Richard Castle: You *were* an ordinary guy, Alan. That's how most superheroes start out; mild-mannered weaklings, and that's you!
Alan Masters: Wow, thanks.
Richard Castle: Relax. It's all to maximize your transformative arc.
Alan Masters: If I agree with you, will you leave me alone?

Kate Beckett: Where are we on the waste management company?
Javier Esposito: Well, it's a new entity called Bullseye. We're not sure who's running it, but rumor is it's a new player on the scene.
Kate Beckett: I don't know. Electrocutions and poisoning doesn't sound like the mob.
Javier Esposito: No.
Kevin Ryan: Unless they're trying to keep a low profile. The best way to stay off our radar is to fly under it.

Kevin Ryan: We IDed the owner of Bullseye Waste Management. He's a guy named Horatio Spate.
Richard Castle: That's a good supervillain name.
Kevin Ryan: This is not a joke. Spate is suspected of executing over a dozen people. I texted you his picture just to put him on your radar. Whatever you do, don't leave the loft.
Richard Castle: Don't leave the loft. Got it.
Kevin Ryan: Wait, what's that noise?
Richard Castle: Uh...
[to avoid the question, he checks the picture Ryan texted; as he turns around, he sees Spate heading towards Alan and Gwen]
Richard Castle: Crap.

Richard Castle: [finding Alan with a gunshot wound in the middle of his forehead] This is my fault. I forced the superhero mantle onto him. I filled his head with crazy ideas of being invulnerable, and then, like some superhero Icarus, he flew too close to the sun. Alan, I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I let you down!
[someone hands him a handkerchief]
Richard Castle: Thank you.
Alan Masters: Don't mention it.
Richard Castle: Alan! You're alive?
Alan Masters: Shh. Not so loud. I've got a splitting headache.
Kevin Ryan: I'll, uh, call an ambulance?
Alan Masters: Relax. I'm fine. I just need a couple of Advil.
[seeing Castle's face]
Alan Masters: What? What is it, Castle?
Richard Castle: [gesturing to his forehead] You...
Alan Masters: Did I get shot in the head?
Richard Castle: Right in the middle! I mean, how did you even... wait, that means you've seen your killer. Who... who was it?
Alan Masters: You're never gonna guess.
Javier Esposito: [approaching with Gwen in handcuffs] Yo. I took her down just before she put a bullet in Mike the chemist.
Gwen Parker: [seeing Alan is still alive] Why the hell won't you die?
Richard Castle: [to Alan, as Espo leads Gwen away] I never thought she was right for you.


"Castle: And Justice for All (#8.13)" (2016)
Kate Beckett: Is that a snake hook?
Javier Esposito: Yup. Looks like our victim was bludgeoned to death with it.
Kate Beckett: Okay. Who's the victim?
Javier Esposito: Uh... we're not a hundred percent sure yet.
Kevin Ryan: The zoo supervisor thinks that it's Eddie Ramirez, the nighttime animal caretaker. If it is, then he's an El Salvador native who's lived in the States for the past few years...
Kate Beckett: Yeah, I'm sorry, uh... can we go back? Why are you having trouble IDing the victim?
Javier Esposito: We can't positively ID the victim yet because the killer tossed his body into...
M.E. Perlmutter: A pit filled with deadly snakes.
Kate Beckett: Okay, well... that's a first.

Javier Esposito: These people all immigrated to this country in search of a better life. It looks like Eddie was trying to help them achieve that.
Kevin Ryan: The question is how do we figure out who else Eddie was helping?
Richard Castle: Well, tonight is international food night, and since Jean-Luc is a chef, I will be plying them with French delicacies.
Javier Esposito: You packing poutine?
Richard Castle: [Ryan and Esposito share a laugh] Javier, I'll have you know that French Canadians are proud descendants of Parisian culture. No, I'll be serving them pastries from La Bernardin restaurant.
Kevin Ryan: Uh, Castle, that's one of the premier French restaurants in the world. They don't do takeout.
Richard Castle: Perhaps not for Jean-Luc Delacroix, but they will for
[in exaggerated French]
Richard Castle: Richard Castle.
[in a sweeping motion, he swings his jacket on, knocking items off of the desk in front of him]
Richard Castle: Sorry about that.

Kevin Ryan: [following a lead] Oh, what a day.
Javier Esposito: Tell me about it. Pit of snakes, getting shot at.
Kevin Ryan: Thank god it's almost over. I don't think I can take any more excitement.
[as they reach their destination, they're swarmed and tackled by a group of FBI agents]

Javier Esposito: This text was sent yesterday during class. Any idea who might've written that?
John Emerson: "Where go my money, Eddie? Yous owe huge. Paybacks time." I don't know, it's... it's hard to say. All my students are still learning English.
Kevin Ryan: Well, then we're gonna need to talk to all your students, one by one.
John Emerson: That's gonna be harder than you think, detective. Most of my students come from countries where the cops are corrupt, so they're not gonna want to talk to you.
Kevin Ryan: Look, teach, we don't tell you how to conjugate a verb. Don't tell us how to interview a suspect.
Javier Esposito: Yeah. We're gonna get them to talk.
[cut to Ryan and Esposito in Beckett's office at the precinct]
Kate Beckett: And you couldn't get any of them to talk?


"Castle: Driven (#7.1)" (2014)
Kate Beckett: [at the scene of Castle's car crash] It's empty. He's not here! He's not in the car!
Javier Esposito: You sure he's not in the car?
Kate Beckett: Even with a fire that hot, there'd still be a body. He's got to be nearby.
Martha Rodgers: You really think he...
Kate Beckett: He's here. He has to be. We have to start a search.
Kevin Ryan: We could use more men.
Kate Beckett: [running over to a patrol cop] Sergeant! I'm Detective Beckett, NYPD. The man that was in that car is one of our own. We need to scrub every inch of this area.
Sgt. Taggert: I'll get my men on it.
Kevin Ryan: You have search and rescue dogs?
Sgt. Taggert: I'll call them in.

Kate Beckett: What?
Kevin Ryan: I had Taggert set up roadblocks to stop and search every vehicle.
Javier Esposito: We figured that the car that ran Castle into the ditch may be the same car he's in now.
Kate Beckett: Okay, we get a description?
Javier Esposito: Not yet, but CSU thinks the side-marker glass up ahead came from a GM. Local PD is canvassing to see if anyone saw any vehicles leaving the area.
Kate Beckett: What about Castle's cell phone?
Javier Esposito: His provider says it's shut off.
Kevin Ryan: Contacted the FBI to see it could be turned on remotely. It's a long shot, but you never know.
Kate Beckett: What else?
Javier Esposito: Kate, everything that can be done is being done.
Kate Beckett: Espo, don't tell me that. They took him. I need to do something.

Tory Ellis: Based on what Cardano said, this is the drop point.
Javier Esposito: Now, what are we looking at here? This is not street cam footage.
Tory Ellis: There's no coverage in the area, but after a rash of break-ins, one of the buildings installed hidden cameras, and I was able to tap in. This is in the time window of when the drop should've taken place.
Kevin Ryan: If we get eyes on Cardano's client, we can get a real lead on who took Castle.
Kate Beckett: [seeing something] There. Go back.
[Tory rewinds the tape]
Kevin Ryan: That's him. That's the client dropping off the cash.
Javier Esposito: I'll set up a canvass. Someone had to see where this guy came from or where he went.
[dialing the phone]
Javier Esposito: Yeah, this is Esposito. Connect me with Operations.
Kate Beckett: Wait. Freeze that. Zoom in.
[Tory stops the tape and zooms in; when the picture is cleaned up, Beckett, Ryan, and Esposito recognize a familiar face]
Kevin Ryan: Can't be.
Javier Esposito: It is. That's Castle. He's the one who dropped off the cash?

Javier Esposito: [Castle has been found] He was found adrift eighty miles off the coast of Delaware by a Coast Guard cutter that was out there mapping the currents.
Kevin Ryan: Captain recognized who he was and had him airlifted here.
Kate Beckett: What was he doing in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, especially in a dinghy with three bullet holes in it.
Kate Beckett: He was shot?
Javier Esposito: The captain says no, but the doctors here won't give us any updates on his condition.
Kate Beckett: Where are Martha and Alexis?
Javier Esposito: In a patrol car on their way here now.
Kate Beckett: Okay.
[Beckett stops short when she sees Castle unconscious in his hospital bed]
Javier Esposito: Kate?
Kate Beckett: I'm fine. I just never thought I'd see him again.


"Castle: PhDead (#8.3)" (2015)
[Castle brings Esposito and Ryan to the underground prison to find everyone and everything gone]
Richard Castle: I told them to stay.
Javier Esposito: They're not dogs, Castle, they're college kids. What'd you expect?
Kevin Ryan: This place has been completely cleared out. Dr. Lillstrom must have had a contingency plan.
Richard Castle: They took all the evidence. And I let it happen. All because I wanted to impress Beckett.

Kevin Ryan: Captain Beckett. What brings you out into the field?
Kate Beckett: Work. What do you think, I'm gonna be stuck in the office just 'cause I'm captain?

Kate Beckett: So, who's our fugitive?
Javier Esposito: No ID yet, but the jumpsuit is standard issue at Rikers. But they say that none of their prisoners have gone missing.
Kevin Ryan: We had them lock down the facility, but a 14,000 inmate head count's gonna take some time.
Kate Beckett: You run his prints?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. So far, nothing.
Kate Beckett: Nothing? The guy's a convicted felon. His fingerprints are on file.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah.
Javier Esposito: Probably a glitch. You know, those portable scanners, sometimes they're wonky.

Kevin Ryan: Rikers completed their head count. All inmates are accounted for.
Kate Beckett: So where'd the vic's jumpsuit come from?
Javier Esposito: [approaching] Costume shop. Our John Doe was not an inmate. He was a college student. Tattoo on his shoulder is the original mascot design of the Hudson U Red Devils. Now, I checked the college website. Peter Garber, 21 years old. Majoring in marketing.
Kevin Ryan: But that doesn't explain the jumpsuit.
Kate Beckett: [realizing something] You guys, it's October. Halloween's basically a month-long party in college.


"Castle: Hong Kong Hustle (#7.17)" (2015)
Kate Beckett: If Henry left work at 2pm, showed up dead at midnight, he's unaccounted for for ten hours, so where was he during that time?
Javier Esposito: Well, he didn't own a car, so I'll check the activity on his metro and credit cards, see if he went anywhere.
Kevin Ryan: I'll circle back with his neighbors, see if they saw anything.
Kate Beckett: Okay. Call me if you guys find anything.
Richard Castle: [as Esposito and Ryan walk away] Whew! For a second there, I thought I was gonna get stuck doing thankless grunt work tonight.
Javier Esposito: [He and Ryan stop and turn around] Castle. We're standing right here.

Kevin Ryan: Lemme tell you a little something about life. You see what you did there, Castle. Rookie mistake.
Richard Castle: What'd I do?
Kevin Ryan: You tried to stop her. I mean, Jenny. She's got her girls nights. I'm totally fine with that. You see, in a marriage, you have to give your partner some space.
Richard Castle: [Totally serious and completely unaware of the irony] Okay. Ryan. Uh, this is my third marriage. I think I know what I'm doing.

Richard Castle: [Trying to reason with Beckett, who is jealous of Zhang] Look, you're idealizing Zhang. You're comparing yourself to a version of her that doesn't even exist. She is a human, like the rest of us. Flaws and all. Not some infallible super cop who swoops in every time to save the day.
Kevin Ryan: Hey. Zhang just got a lead that could crack this case.
Kate Beckett: [to Castle, folding her arms over her chest and giving him her 'look'] You were saying?

Richard Castle: [Zhang managed to get the drop on, and disarm, both Ryan and Esposito] So, you mean to tell me she got both your guns?
Kevin Ryan: Hey, you... you weren't there. She's fast. I mean, like, crazy fast.
Javier Esposito: Please. She ain't all that.
Richard Castle: And yet she got both your guns.


"Castle: XX (#8.2)" (2015)
Richard Castle: [watching the surveillance video of Beckett's visit to Bracken] What did Beckett say that freaked him out so much?
[Ryan rewinds the tape]
Senator William Bracken: How do you know about LokSat?
Kate Beckett: Doesn't matter how. The question is what is it, and why is there a hit squad running around the East Coast, killing people to protect it?
Kevin Ryan: LokSat. Never heard of it.
Javier Esposito: Me, neither, but it clearly scares the hell out of Bracken.
Richard Castle: Figuring out what it means is key, and that's exactly what Beckett is doing.

Allison Hyde: I'm not here to run roughshod over you. Captain Beckett is one of yours, and rescuing her is priority one. Now, where's Richard Castle?
Javier Esposito: Well, we're not sure. Why?
Allison Hyde: Honestly, I think he could be our most valuable asset in locating Captain Beckett. But I need to know whether he can be trusted.
Kevin Ryan: Castle loves Beckett more than anything, and he's desperate to find her.

Kevin Ryan: Let me get this straight. So, you and Vikram here, you're being hunted by a secret death squad that's being sanctioned by someone deep inside the CIA, and you don't want any help?
Vikram Singh: Haven't you been paying attention? There is no help.
Javier Esposito: Bro, the A.G.'s office has resources.
Kate Beckett: It wouldn't matter. These people have the power to pull strings, to make evidence, cases, people disappear. We can't work through the system.
Richard Castle: So, we have to work outside the system. Beckett's right. Can't fight a faceless enemy who lives in the shadows unless we drag them out into the light.
Kate Beckett: What do you mean?
Richard Castle: Whoever's behind this memo relies on secrecy. The one and only thing that LokSat fears...
Kate Beckett: Is exposure they can't control.
Richard Castle: Exactly.
Kate Beckett: If we pour enough light on this conspiracy...
Richard Castle: Then whoever's behind it can't come after you or Vikram.
Kate Beckett: Because everyone will be watching.
Richard Castle: And I know exactly how to turn those lights on.

Javier Esposito: Was Bracken normally in solitary?
Guard: No. After he met with Mr. Castle, he attacked a guard.
Kevin Ryan: So you stuck him in the hole. Must have figured it was his safest bet.


"Castle: Kill Switch (#7.8)" (2014)
Javier Esposito: [On the phone with Ryan] Hey, bro. Yeah, I followed him down to the subway. I'm looking for him now.
Kevin Ryan: What, you lost him?
Javier Esposito: No, I didn't lose him. I just... don't have visual contact.

Tory Ellis: This is street cam video of that pay phone. 11:04 yesterday morning, this is the man who called Paul Reeves.
Kevin Ryan: Tory ran the image and got a match on his face.
Richard Castle: Jared Stone. "Misdemeanor computer trespassing"?
Tory Ellis: Otherwise known as hacking.

Captain Bigelow: Detective Ryan.
Kevin Ryan: Yes, sir.
Captain Bigelow: Captain Bigelow, HRT. What's the intel on your suspect?
Kevin Ryan: Sir, he's a hacker, an Occupy Wall Street activist. It's all sketchy.
Captain Bigelow: What about your boy Esposito? Is he someone we can count on? He solid?
Kevin Ryan: He's as solid as they get.

Kevin Ryan: [after Esposito is cured of a deadly virus] Man, you had me scared.
Javier Esposito: That's because you're a wimp.


"Castle: The Blame Game (#8.12)" (2016)
Kate Beckett: Hey, Lanie, how you doing?
Lanie Parish: A heck of a lot better than our victim here. Name is Emma Matthews, thirty-four years old. Single GSW to the upper back, through and through. Here's our exit wound. Based on lividity, I'm placing the time of death between 9:00 and 11:00 last night.
Kate Beckett: And the neighbors didn't hear a gunshot?
Kevin Ryan: No, the music was turned up too loud. But the neighbor next door said he saw a rusty, white van parked outside near the time of death window. Didn't get a plate, though.
Kate Beckett: Does Emma have a roommate?
Javier Esposito: No. She lives alone. But we've, uh, notified next of kin and we've got a list of her friends and co-workers.
Kevin Ryan: Emma was a television producer at channel 8 news. Some of her co-workers are gonna meet us back at the precinct.
Kate Beckett: [noticing the symbol drawn on the mirror] And what's with the artwork?
Javier Esposito: Not sure yet, but we think that our killer may have drawn it.
Kate Beckett: All right, check with the FBI see if the M.O. or if the symbol matches anything in their database.

Kate Beckett: Hey, Ryan, anything from the FBI?
Kevin Ryan: No. The symbol's not in their database. Neither is our killer's M.O.
Kate Beckett: And what about the white, rusty van outside of Emma's apartment? You guys track it down?
Kevin Ryan: No traffic cams on her block, so so far it's not looking good.

Alexis Castle: Dad's missing, and we can't reach Beckett's cell.
Javier Esposito: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on. Hold on.
[he puts the call on speakerphone]
Javier Esposito: Beckett's at a forensics conference, Alexis.
Alexis Castle: No, she never showed.
Hayley Shipton: Rick was lured into an empty building this morning. I hacked a nearby street camera and got footage of a white van fleeing the scene.
Javier Esposito: [quietly to Ryan] Neighbors saw a white van in front of Emma's building.
Alexis Castle: Who's Emma?
Kevin Ryan: A murder victim. We think her killer might have been driving a rusty white van.

Javier Esposito: You guys okay?
Kate Beckett: Yeah. Thanks for rescuing us.
Hayley Shipton: [sarcastic] Yes, because clearly you're helpless without us.
Richard Castle: How'd you guys even find us?
Kevin Ryan: Well, we had our best person on it.
[Alexis runs into the room]
Alexis Castle: I can't leave you alone for five minutes.
Richard Castle: Does this mean no hug?


"Castle: Law & Boarder (#6.21)" (2014)
[after arguing over who deserves to be Castle's best man, Ryan and Esposito are disappointed to learn he already asked Alexis]
Kevin Ryan: I didn't see that coming.
Javier Esposito: I can't believe I gave him my pen.
Kevin Ryan: I can't believe I shared a family secret recipe.
Javier Esposito: I can't believe we just got beat by a girl.
Kevin Ryan: Let's never speak of this again.
Javier Esposito: Speak of what?

Kevin Ryan: The reality of it is, is that Castle is friends with famous people, like James Patterson and Stephen King.
Javier Esposito: Who? Come on, man. You really think Castle wants one of those guys standing beside him when he ties the knot?
Kevin Ryan: You know, maybe you're right. Castle has spent practically every day in the precinct for the past few years. Why wouldn't he ask one of us to be his best man?
Javier Esposito: Why wouldn't he pick me to be his best man is what you mean.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, Javi, I'm the obvious choice. If you can't see it, I can't explain it to you.

Javier Esposito: Hey, man. I've been thinking. You know, Castle likes us both too much to have to make the pick for best man, so we should make the decision for him.
Kevin Ryan: Um... it's his wedding. How do you propose we decide for him?
Javier Esposito: Well, one of us is gonna have to drop out. And by "one of us", I mean you.
Kevin Ryan: Me? Why should it be me?
Javier Esposito: [derisive snort] Because... you think Richard Castle wants you planning his bachelor party? Come on, bro.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, Esposito, see, being a best man is a lot more than just preparing the bachelor party. I'm a family man. I represent a high moral standing.
Javier Esposito: Oh, please.
Kevin Ryan: And I photograph better than you.
Javier Esposito: What?
[warningly]
Javier Esposito: Let me tell you something. You're going down. And just remember that I gave you an opportunity to bow out gracefully. You hear me?
Kevin Ryan: [skeptically] Okay.
Javier Esposito: [pleasantly, as Castle and Beckett approach] Castle! Hey, buddy, how's it going?
Richard Castle: Don't ask.
Javier Esposito: Well, as your close friend, now I have to ask.
Kevin Ryan: Did she beat you at Scrabble again?
Richard Castle: [avoiding the question] Can we just talk about the case, please?


"Castle: Hollander's Woods (#7.23)" (2015)
Kate Beckett: [meeting Ryan and Esposito at the crime scene] What are you guys fighting about?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, the first case that Captain Montgomery partnered us on. Ten years ago today.
Richard Castle: Really? It's your manniversary? And I didn't get you anything.

Kevin Ryan: Beckett, this thing that Castle says happened, it was decades ago. Is he really sure about this?
Kate Beckett: As sure as I've ever seen him.

Kate Beckett: Guys, is there any way to check police records from thirty years ago? See if there were any abandoned cars ticketed within a fifty mile radius of Hollander's Woods?
Javier Esposito: Sure. We just have to call all municipal police departments in the area.
Kevin Ryan: And wait for them to stop laughing long enough to beg them to check their dusty storage rooms... you're serious?
Kate Beckett: [nods] We need to know exactly what we're dealing with here. So, happy manniversary.


"Castle: He's Dead, She's Dead (#3.2)" (2010)
Richard Castle: Did I hear you right? Our victim is Vivien Marchand, the psychic medium?
Kevin Ryan: You've heard of her?
Richard Castle: Yeah! She was very popular in certain Manhattan circles. As a matter of fact, she did a reading for me at a society party about eight years ago. It was pretty extraordinary.
Kate Beckett: Extraordinary?
Richard Castle: She got everything right. You know what? Come to think of it, she told me that a beautiful woman would one day move into my loft and stay with me forever. She neglected to mention it was my mother.

Kevin Ryan: [looking at their victim's business calendar] She's got a notation here for three p.m. yesterday. It just says "T.J."
Kate Beckett: And nothing else?
Kevin Ryan: Nope. Maybe T.J. was a ghost coming to visit. Mediums are the ones that can see ghosts, right, Castle?
Richard Castle: Yes. Psychics can tell the future, mediums can tell the future and talk to the dead.
Kate Beckett: That's like saying psychics are con artists and mediums are con artists and charlatans. I mean, in the end, they're all just fakes.
Richard Castle: You sound pretty certain of yourself.
Kate Beckett: That's because when I started as a cop, I wasted a lot of time on clairvoyants calling tip lines with information that never lead to anything. I mean, I'm surprised you're so gullible.
Richard Castle: I'm not saying I can speak with the dead. I'm just willing to admit that there are people in this world who are more sensitive than me.
Kate Beckett: Now that's not hard to believe.
Richard Castle: [realizing she just insulted him] Walked right into that one.

Richard Castle: [as Beckett reads a note allegedly written by the victim] The psychic predicted her own murder!
Kate Beckett: Or the killer wrote this in order to throw us off. Run it. Maybe we'll get lucky with prints.
Kevin Ryan: [Beckett and Castle leave] Do you think she really...
Javier Esposito: [immediately and firmly] No.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, me neither.


"Castle: Significant Others (#5.10)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: Hey, guys, uh... I think we might have our theory backwards. What if it wasn't an angry ex-husband that killed Ms. Twohey? What if... it was an ex-wife?
Kate Beckett: [pointedly to Castle] Oh, wow, a troublesome ex-wife? Imagine that.
[to Ryan]
Kate Beckett: So you think one of her clients killed her?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, well, Lanie got a hit on the blood found on Michelle's jacket. It belongs to a Samantha Voss. She's in the system to due a DUI arrest in Los Angeles.
Kate Beckett: Did she have a grievance with Michelle?
Kevin Ryan: Oh, I'd say so. The morning of Michelle's murder, a judge came down with a ruling in Samantha's contentious divorce case. She lost big.
Richard Castle: How big is big?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, Upper East Side apartment big, car and boats big, half of her multi-million dollar net worth big.
Richard Castle: That's big.

Javier Esposito: Bro, what was that?
Richard Castle: What was what?
Kevin Ryan: Your girlfriend just uttered a sarcastic remark about your ex-wife, and all you're gonna say is "What was what"?
Richard Castle: Oh, that was nothing.
Javier Esposito: Spit it out.
Kevin Ryan: Tell us.
Richard Castle: Uh, okay, as you know, Beckett is staying at the loft while her place is getting fumigated, Alexis is home sick as well, and then Meredith showed up and she said she wanted to stay in the loft...
Javier Esposito: And you said no.
[Castle remains silent]
Javier Esposito: Tell me you said no.
[Castle is at a loss for words]
Javier Esposito: Wow.
Kevin Ryan: Really?
Javier Esposito: Letting an ex stay with you when you're with someone else, that's like throwing gasoline on fireworks.
Richard Castle: Come on. Guys, it's not that bad.
Javier Esposito: Castle, you are on the edge of a very, very steep cliff, my friend.
Kevin Ryan: And if you don't do something about it quick...
[Ryan and Esposito both pantomime a firework whistling into the air]

Kevin Ryan: Man, look at this place.
Javier Esposito: Eh. It's all right.
Kevin Ryan: You kidding me?
Javier Esposito: What?
Kevin Ryan: It has always been a dream of mine to come home to a house like this.
Javier Esposito: [seeing an attractive woman inside] Screw the house. It's always been a dream of mine to come home to a woman like that.
Kevin Ryan: Right. Until, of course, things got serious, which is when you'd dump her and start looking for your next dream woman.


"Castle: Tick, Tick, Tick... (#2.17)" (2010)
Kate Beckett: Castle just finished making breakfast and he went to the door...
Kevin Ryan: What kind of breakfast?
Kate Beckett: Um, I'm sorry?
Kevin Ryan: What kind of breakfast was he making?
Kate Beckett: Pancakes.
Kevin Ryan: Well isn't that domestic.
Kate Beckett: [annoyed] Anyway, the paper usually arrives at four and we were up at seven so that means the killer had a three hour window where he could have left the body there unnoticed.
Kevin Ryan: Uh-huh, and exactly what time did you and Mr. Castle go to bed last night?
Kate Beckett: I think we're done here.

Javier Esposito: Dude, I see Beckett in her jammies, wine glasses on the table...
Richard Castle: There's nothing going on with Beckett and me! No more than there was yesterday.
Kevin Ryan: Dude, you made her pancakes?
Richard Castle: It's just breakfast!
Javier Esposito: Pancakes is not just breakfast. It's an edible way of saying "Thank you SO much for last night."
Kevin Ryan: Castle, come on, we're your friends. Details.
Richard Castle: Okay, come here.
[the boys form a huddle]
Richard Castle: There are no details!
Javier Esposito: I can't even look at you right now.
Kevin Ryan: [writing on his notepad] Witness refuses to cooperate.

Kevin Ryan: Unis pulled this from a trash bin. Wallet's inside. Vic's name is Michelle Lewis.
Javier Esposito: According to her business card, she's a dog walker.
Kate Beckett: There's a print here, and it's too large to be our victim's. Let's get it to the lab for...
[Shaw snaps a photo of the purse]
Kate Beckett: What are you doing?
Special Agent Jordan Shaw: That print is already in the lab and being processed. No muss, no fuss, no black powder on your clothes.
Richard Castle: [in awed jealousy] Wow! There's an app for that?
Special Agent Jordan Shaw: That's why I joined the FBI, Mr. Castle. For the toys. Really eager to see that body.
Richard Castle: [as Shaw leaves] Can I take a look at that?
[Castle moves to follow her, but Beckett stops him]
Richard Castle: Be a chance to check it later.


"Castle: For Better or Worse (#6.23)" (2014)
Kate Beckett: [handing Esposito and Ryan a stack of folders] Those are my case files. Ask your questions, because I will be pretty much unreachable for the next three weeks.
Kevin Ryan: [taking the folders and forcing them on Esposito] Okay. What are you most excited about, the wedding or the honeymoon?
Javier Esposito: Three weeks in the Maldives on a private island? What do you think?
[Esposito hands the folders back]
Kate Beckett: Actually, the only thing that I'm not excited about is having to say my vows in front of all those people.
Kevin Ryan: Well, you'll be fine. Just imagine your wedding guests are murder suspects.
Javier Esposito: In their underwear.
Kate Beckett: Or not.
Captain Victoria Gates: [coming out from her office] You know, I was so nervous before my wedding that I ran into a wall and got a black eye. You're supposed to be a wreck. You're about to experience one of the most important days of your life. I'm so happy for you, Detective.
Richard Castle: [entering] Hey, guys!
Captain Victoria Gates: In spite of who you're marrying.

Henry Browning: You were both over 18. Regardless of your seriousness or intent at the time, I'm afraid that your wedding at the Drive-Thru of Love was real, legal, and binding.
Kate Beckett: [gesturing to herself and Castle] Okay, we are getting married in three days.
Henry Browning: I'm afraid you can't. Not unless you terminate your first marriage.
Kate Beckett: We have three hundred people coming. Most of them are flying in. So what are we going to say to all of them?
Richard Castle: Henry, is there anything we can do to make this go away?
Henry Browning: It's possible, if there's mutual consent. I brought a dissolution of marriage contract, and I could expedite it through the city, but... you'll have to get Mr. O'Leary to sign it, too.
Kate Beckett: How? It's been fifteen years. I have no idea where he is.
Kevin Ryan: [cut to Ryan and Esposito at the precinct] Okay, looks like we found him. But man, is your husband a piece of work.
Kate Beckett: He's not my husband.
Richard Castle: Except legally, he is.
Kate Beckett: So, what do we know about him?
Javier Esposito: Well, your boy got around. He was charged with theft in Austin in '05. He did time for a DUI in Iowa in '07.
Kevin Ryan: He was arrested for fraud in Kentucky, and, uh... oh, this is a good one. He was put in jail for impersonating an FBI agent in New Orleans.
Richard Castle: I must say, given his record, I'm really surprised you stayed with him all these years.

Kevin Ryan: [getting fitted for their tuxedos, Ryan enters in a suit about three sizes too small] Um, Alexis? I haven't gained this much daddy weight.
Alexis Castle: That can't be right. I double checked the size ten times.
Javier Esposito: Hey, maybe you finally hit that growth spurt you've been waiting on, bro.


"Castle: The Wrong Stuff (#7.16)" (2015)
Kate Beckett: I'd like to see the body, so where is the simulation?
Ed Redley: A couple of stories below us. And that's easier said than done.
Kevin Ryan: In order to mimic conditions on Mars as well as discourage any cheating, the simulation's filled with noxious gas.
Ed Redley: It won't kill you. But, it will induce severe nausea and a rash. It will take several days to vent the sim to make the air breathable. So, if you wanna to go in, you're gonna need to wear space suits.
Richard Castle: [Unable to contain his excitement] *Best* case ever!
[Pastes a serious look on his face]
Richard Castle: This way?

Richard Castle: [preparing to enter the Mars simulation] There's only three suits.
Kevin Ryan: Um... that's okay. We don't all need to go in. I'll go take statements back at the facility.
Richard Castle: Seriously? You don't want to go to Mars?
Kevin Ryan: A, it's actually not Mars, and B, I'm happy here on Earth. But have fun, Castle.
Richard Castle: Trust me, I will.

Richard Castle: You're telling me you have no desire to go to Mars?
Kevin Ryan: I prefer my oxygen without a can.
Richard Castle: Where's your sense of adventure? Of exploration? Of... destiny.
Kevin Ryan: If I want to fly thousands of miles to see a lifeless orb, I can just visit Jenny's grandmother. Same hostile environment, same freezing temperatures, same noxious atmosphere.


"Castle: Wrapped Up in Death (#2.19)" (2010)
Kevin Ryan: Do you want to?
Javier Esposito: No, go ahead bro, you caught it.
Kevin Ryan: You sure?
Kate Beckett: You know, whenever you guys are done being cute.

Kate Beckett: So far, this case is nothing but dead ends.
Kevin Ryan: Mm. You know why?
Kate Beckett: Why?
Javier Esposito: Because... Castle's cursed.
Richard Castle: You had to tell them, did you?
Kate Beckett: Yes. Yes, I did.

Kate Beckett: [Castle believes he's been cursed; in the break room, the cappuccino machine is steaming] What happened?
Richard Castle: I don't know. I was... gonna make a coffee and the cappuccino machine started shaking, and just as I hit the deck, it exploded.
Kevin Ryan: You could have been killed.
Richard Castle: I know!
[Beckett, Ryan, and Esposito snicker, then burst into laughter]
Richard Castle: [realizing he's been pranked] Ohh... very... okay, very funny. Yes, you got me.
Javier Esposito: "Ooh, I'm Castle. I don't believe in curses."
Richard Castle: What, did you get bomb disposal to rig something up?
Kate Beckett: Yeah, it was all flash and no damage.
Richard Castle: And the chair?
Kate Beckett: I just pulled a couple of screws and let gravity do the rest.
[she high fives Ryan and Esposito]
Kate Beckett: Night, Castle.
Richard Castle: [the three of them leave, still laughing] I'm not cleaning this up!
[pause]
Richard Castle: I'd better clean this up.


"Castle: Nanny McDead (#1.2)" (2009)
Kevin Ryan: Mrs Rosenberg, 9E here, comes down to put her clothes in the dryer, finds it's occupied, comes down a half an hour later and she's had enough. Decides to take matters into her own hands.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: Come on, you're telling me an old lady killed someone over a busy dryer?
Kevin Ryan: What? No, she's just tired of waiting around. So, she opens up the drier to take the other person's clothes out. Finds Miss Fluff and Fold here instead.
Javier Esposito: If that's not a cautionary tale about poking around someone's laundry, I don't know what is.
Kevin Ryan: Dude, there is an etiquette involved. If the clothes were dry, Mrs Rosenberg had every right to put them in the basket.Now, if you're going to tell me that she folded them, then it gets a little creepy.
Javier Esposito: 'm sorry, but if someone starts rooting around in my underwear without an invitation, I'm taking it as a serious breach of hygiene.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: I thought you went commando, Esposito?
Javier Esposito: Well. It's a seasonal thing.

NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: Where are we on the boyfriend?
Javier Esposito: His story checks out. Video and a sign-in sheet.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: Great. So now all we have is a cheating husband with a possible alibi and no cell phone to run the perp's fingerprints.
Kevin Ryan: I got something better.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: [rolling her eyes at Castle] Please tell me it's that the mayor wants him out of here.
Richard Castle: You ever notice how she gets a little grumpy when she doesn't have a suspect?
Kevin Ryan: We got one now. Guess who wasn't where they say they were the day Sara Manning was killed?
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: [Ryan offers a Post-It note, but pulls it back when Beckett snatches for it] Who?
Kevin Ryan: Come on, you gotta guess.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: [snatching at the Post-It again] Ryan. Ryan. I'm not guessing.
Kevin Ryan: [handing the Post-It over] You're a killjoy, you know that?
Richard Castle: Exactly what I've been telling her.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: [reading the note] No way.
Kevin Ryan: Pretty good, huh? Told you you should have guessed.

Captain Roy Montgomery: Esposito and Ryan pulled security tape from an elevator in the rear entrance.
Kevin Ryan: Front door has a 24-hour doorman.
Javier Esposito: This is the elevator's cam. Our victim gets on the elevator with the laundry basket. Takes it down to the basement, to put the kid's laundry into the washer.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: Mm-hmm.
Javier Esposito: Few minutes later, gets back on, goes all the way back up to the apartment. Then about forty minutes later, rides the elevator back down to the basement again.
Kevin Ryan: We figured probably to take the kid's clothes out of the washer, put 'em in the dryer.
Captain Roy Montgomery: Camera never picks her up again.
Kevin Ryan: Only other person to ride the elevator down all the way to the basement during the next hour was the old lady who found the body.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: So whoever attacked her must have used the stairwell, otherwise the camera would have caught him.
Kevin Ryan: We got... three maintenance workers on duty that day. We'll run their names tonight.
Richard Castle: Why only run the workers' names? Why not run all the neighbors' names?
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: What are you basing that on?
Richard Castle: I'm basing that on... the neighbor would make a better story.
[the group snickers derisively]
Richard Castle: No, come on. What do any of us know about our neighbors in this city? You think the guy living next door to the Son of Sam knew he was living next door to the Son of Sam?


"Castle: The Fifth Bullet (#2.11)" (2009)
Richard Castle: I'm telling you, ice bullet.
Javier Esposito: Nah, bro. An ice bullet would still make a bullet hole.
Kevin Ryan: You mean ice hole.
Richard Castle: What'd you just call me?

Kevin Ryan: You mean ice bullet.

Kevin Ryan: [Reporting about the 5th bullet found embedded in the amnesiac's paperback] Ballistics confirms that the bullet came from the same gun as the others. Whatever happened in the gallery, he was there.
Kate Beckett: Not only was he there, but someone tried to kill him as well. Good thing he reads.
Kevin Ryan: Good thing he reads Russian literature. If the guy was a Nicholas Sparks fan, he'd be dead.


"Castle: The Squab and the Quail (#5.21)" (2013)
Richard Castle: Is that Eric Vaughn?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, yeah. He was part of the victim's dinner party. He's a billionaire inventor, right?
Richard Castle: Yeah. Inventor, innovator, and number 8 on my LSL.
Kevin Ryan: LSL?
Richard Castle: Last supper list. You and a table of 12 with anyone from history. What is mine, you ask? I'm glad you did. In order it is, Lincoln, Einstein, Ian Fleming, John Lennon, Joan of Arc, Sinatra
[Gets a look from Beckett]
Richard Castle: And you, of course.

Javier Esposito: Beckett's hanging with Vaughn? Hell yeah you should be worried. His hit list includes half of Maxim's Hot 100. Oh, and unlike you, his helicopter doesn't need a remote control.
Javier Esposito: Don't listen to him, Castle. Beckett's loyal to you. She's not going be seduced by his charms.
Richard Castle: [hopeful] Really?
Javier Esposito: So you'd let Jenny hang with him, then?
Kevin Ryan: Hell no. I wouldn't let Jenny near that guy.
Richard Castle: Thanks. Okay, but I'm not worried.
[gets looks]
Richard Castle: I'm not. I just - I can't believe the department is forcing her to hang out with some womanizing rich guy against her will.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Unbelievable.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, she's never done that before.

Richard Castle: [after an attempt on Vaughn's life, Ryan is taking Beckett's statement] So, he ate the wrong entrée and avoided being poisoned, and then he "stumbled" at just the right time to avoid being shot by an assassin through a window. Nobody's that lucky. What's going on here, Kate?
Kate Beckett: He kissed me, okay, Castle?
Richard Castle: He what?
Kevin Ryan: [awkwardly leaving] I think I have all I need here.


"Castle: G.D.S. (#8.14)" (2016)
Richard Castle: You know, I work very closely with the 12th precinct in New York. Detectives Ryan and Esposito. They could talk to Harris' sister for you, maybe run down any New York clues.
Detective Menendez: Okay, thanks. I'll give them a call. Excuse me.
Richard Castle: Tell them said hi. They love me.
Kevin Ryan: [cut to New York] Castle? He's a giant pain in the ass, but he's good people.

Veronica Harris: My brother was right.
Kevin Ryan: Right about what?
Veronica Harris: The Phantom. A serial killer Phillip was hunting. He stumbled onto it working a missing persons case.
Javier Esposito: We haven't heard of any active serials nicknamed the Phantom.
Veronica Harris: That's why Phillip called him the Phantom; because no one has any idea that he exists. According to Phillip, the Phantom had been killing people in Los Angeles and New York for the last several years.
Javier Esposito: A bicostal serial killer?
Veronica Harris: Right before Phillip flew back to L.A., he told me that he'd had a break in the case; that he was close to identifying the Phantom. He must have gotten too close to the truth.

Lanie Parish: I pulled autopsy reports on the Phantom's alleged victims. Total of seven; four in L.A., three in New York. All seven were killed with a knife.
Kevin Ryan: Any pattern besides the knife?
Lanie Parish: No. The victims are all over the map. Four men, three women. Different ethnicities and ages. Each of the victims had something removed; an ear, an eye, a finger.
Kevin Ryan: Why? What's the significance of that?
Lanie Parish: There is none. And because of the randomness, no one was able to connect the murders. Until Phillip Harris, of course.
Javier Esposito: So Phillip was right. A serial killer's been hunting in L.A. and New York for three years completely under the radar.


"Castle: Til Death Do Us Part (#4.11)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: Ms. Franklin, it - it seems that you weren't the only woman that Mr. Bailey was, uh... with in the hours prior to his death.
Holly Franklin: Um... what do you mean, "with"?
Kevin Ryan: Was there another woman in the hotel room with you?
Holly Franklin: I didn't think this could get any more humiliating.
Kevin Ryan: Was that a yes?
Holly Franklin: No, Detective!
Kevin Ryan: Thank you. Oh, and you should know that our ME has been able to determine that Mr. Bailey was, uh... wearing a condom both times, so that's...
Holly Franklin: [Sarcastic] That makes it all better.
[Ryan stands awkwardly for a bit before fleeing]
Holly Franklin: Now I wish I pushed him!

Richard Castle: She knew she was going to kill him, so she booked the room anonymously.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, but then why sleep with him? Why not just push him out the window?
Richard Castle: Because. She's a black widow.
[Starts speaking in a dramatic tone]
Richard Castle: Coldest hearted creature on Earth. She lures an unsuspecting male, takes him into her web, and then, the moment they culminate - as soon as he feels the ecstasy of achieving his biological destiny - she opens up her jaws and eats him alive.
[There's silence for a moment]
Kevin Ryan: I'm glad I'm in a healthy relationship.
Kate Beckett: Yeah.
Richard Castle: I bet male black widow spiders think they're in healthy relationships, too.

Javier Esposito: [to Ryan who's been on a dietary cleanse for several days] You should... eat something.
Kate Beckett: Yeah. You look hungry. You've got the posture of a feral cat.
Kevin Ryan: Guys, I made a sacred vow to the woman I love- Is that mu-shu pork?


"Castle: Hell Hath No Fury (#1.4)" (2009)
Kevin Ryan: You're telling me you've lived in New York your whole life and you've never scored a piece of roadkill?
Javier Esposito: "Roadkill"?
Kevin Ryan: It's an accepted practice, bro. You're done with your old stuff, you leave it on the street for those less fortunate. Artists, students, former hedge-fund managers... It's trickle-down economics at its finest.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, well, I prefer not to be trickled on.
Kevin Ryan: You know that red couch I have? The one you like so much?
Javier Esposito: Don't you say it, bro.
Kevin Ryan: Fifty-fourth and Lex.
Javier Esposito: That's gross. Gross. We are never playing Madden at your place again.

Kate Beckett: The 800 number is registered to a PO box from out of state. We're gonna have to get Cyber to track down the IP, see where it's hosted.
Richard Castle: Well, what if the IP's out of state, too?
Javier Esposito: We just coordinate with local PDs.
Kevin Ryan: If they're willing to cooperate.
Kate Beckett: Sites like these are designed to evade authorities. We'll get there. It'll just take us some time.
Richard Castle: [dialing his phone] Or you could just do it the easy way.
[the line picks up]
Kate Beckett: Castle, what are you doing?
Richard Castle: Hi! My name's Richard. I'm a very generous man looking to arrange a very special date with Tiffany.
[realizing what he's doing, Beckett chases after him to get him to hang up]
Richard Castle: Just give me a call on my phone, which is 347-555-0179. Thank you.
[he hangs up]
Kate Beckett: Castle, you can't just call and arrange a date with a prostitute.
Richard Castle: Why not?
Kate Beckett: Because we're the police.
Richard Castle: No, no, no, no. *You're* the police. I'm just a lonely upscale gentleman looking for a date.

Javier Esposito: [looking at the "VIP Liaisons" website] Damn! Those are some seriously fine five-star Class-B misdemeanors.
Kevin Ryan: Dude, between you and me, you ever pay for it?
Richard Castle: Are you counting my marriages?


"Castle: Last Call (#3.10)" (2010)
Javier Esposito: According to his fingerprints, his name is Donald Hayes. Navy veteran, served in Desert Storm, and he's been a dock worker since '94.
Kevin Ryan: Somehow still employed as one. Our victim, Donny Hayes. Currently clocked in and on duty at the East Side docks.
Richard Castle: Which either means he's an incredibly dedicated zombie...
Kate Beckett: Or he's a suspect in our murder.

Captain Roy Montgomery: [offering Castle one of the Scotch bottles] This is early Christmas, baby.
Richard Castle: [choking up] I... I was not expecting this.
Javier Esposito: Are you crying?
Richard Castle: Yes. I don't know what to say.
Kate Beckett: Try "Let me get my checkbook."
Richard Castle: Yes, of course. Of course, but I... I will only accept this if you all share it with me.
Captain Roy Montgomery: [holding up a glass] Twist my arm.
Richard Castle: No. Not here. Um... at the Old Haunt. We will toast to Donnie, with his family.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, wh... what about that place? What happens to the Old Haunt?
Javier Esposito: It's gonna go back to the bank, which means that TJ McChucklenuts is gonna get another shot at it.
Richard Castle: Oh, I wouldn't worry about the Old Haunt.
Kate Beckett: You bought it, didn't you?

Richard Castle: So, you joining us?
Kate Beckett: You know, I'd love to. It's late, and I've got a lot of paperwork.
Richard Castle: [checking his watch] It's nine o'clock on a Saturday.
Javier Esposito: [checking his own] It's 9:15, actually.
Richard Castle: [singing] The regular crowd shuffles in.
Kevin Ryan: [joining in] There's an old man sitting next to me.
Javier Esposito, Captain Roy Montgomery: [joining in, as well] Making love to his tonic and gin.
[they all look at Beckett expectantly]
Kate Beckett: [giving in] He said "Son, can you play me a memory? I'm not really sure how it goes."
Javier Esposito, Kevin Ryan, Richard Castle, Captain Roy Montgomery, Kate Beckett: [leaving together] But it's sad and it's sweet, and I knew it complete, when I wore a younger man's clothes. Sing us a song, you're the piano man. Sing us a song tonight. Well, we're all in the mood for a melody...


"Castle: The Fast and the Furriest (#5.20)" (2013)
Javier Esposito: I may have an explanation for those facial wounds. Turns out our victim worked at a retirement home called Haven House.
Richard Castle: Vicious blood thirsty old folks? Is that your theory?
Javier Esposito: This home is not for people, Castle. It's a primate sanctuary. Mostly for apes and chimpanzees and monkeys who have retired from the movie business.
Kevin Ryan: I always wanted a pet monkey when I was a kid. Big Curious George fan.
Richard Castle: Yeah, wait 'til George grows up. An adult chimpanzee can reach 200 pounds, tear off a man's face, hands, and naughty bits.
Kate Beckett: All right, we're going to go to the primate sanctuary. If Anne was attacked there maybe someone dumped her body to cover it up. And call me if you get anything on that sedan.
Kevin Ryan: [Calls as they leave] George would never do that!

M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: [Ryan and Esposito enter the morgue] Ugh. The "B" team.
Javier Esposito: Talk about the "B" team.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: I had hoped to see Castle's look of dismay when I told him cause of death was nothing more exotic than blunt-force trauma to the cranium. It seems that she was clobbered over the head with a club or a pipe.
Javier Esposito: You could have said so over the phone.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Ah, but I also made two highly intriguing discoveries.
Kevin Ryan: About the wounds on her face?
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Well, their cause is still undetermined, but of far greater interest is the fact...
Kevin Ryan: Because it could be claw marks. Bigfoot has claws.
Javier Esposito: So does Wolverine. Is he real?
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Are you done?

Javier Esposito: [identifying the man the victim was seen arguing with] His name is Chase Diggins, and he's an Australian adventurer and big game hunter.
Kevin Ryan: Kind of Crocodile Dundee meets Indiana Jones meets Ted Nugent.


"Castle: Under the Influence (#5.11)" (2013)
Richard Castle: If he didn't kill Holly then who did?
Javier Esposito: The brains behind this operation, that's who. A kid like Joey goes from smash and grab to stealing a half a mil in jewelry? I don't think so. Someone put him up to this.
Kevin Ryan: No, it makes sense. Some savvy criminals use minors to do their dirty work.
Richard Castle: Of course. A Fagin to Joey's Oliver Twist.
Kevin Ryan: And if Holly's involved, that makes her the Artful Dodger. Or the Artful DJ.
Richard Castle: Ooh, nicely played.

Kevin Ryan: [Esposito walks into the precinct handcuffed to Joey] Okay... Care to explain?
Javier Esposito: What? The handcuffs?
Kevin Ryan: No, no, the stylish shoes that you're wearing. Yes, the handcuffs.
Javier Esposito: Well, junior here tried to pull a Houdini on me last night.
Joey Malone: Who the hell is Houdini?
Javier Esposito: Shut up.
Kevin Ryan: Out the window?
Javier Esposito: Yeah.
Kevin Ryan: Down the fire escape?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. And then onto a moving garbage truck. Then on a skateboard for five blocks, which took him all the way to the L train.
Kevin Ryan: How'd you keep up?
Joey Malone: He didn't.
Javier Esposito: Shut up.

Javier Esposito: Yo. Did you just do the hair thing?
Kevin Ryan: What hair thing?
Javier Esposito: [scoffs] Every time you're about to meet a celebrity or a pretty girl, you run your hand through your hair.
Kevin Ryan: TMZ said that Tyrese was at that party with Josie Lang. He's producing her new album.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, well, she's no Regina.
Kevin Ryan: I understand that the image of her as a Girl Scout is seared into your memory, but Josie is a real vocalist.
Javier Esposito: Whose fan base consists of twelve year old girls and you.


"Castle: Witness for the Prosecution (#8.10)" (2016)
Richard Castle: I can't believe how badly I blew it out there. This is my fault, guys. I'm sorry.
Kevin Ryan: Don't do that to yourself. We've all been tripped up on the witness stand.
Javier Esposito: True. Back when I was in uniform, a defense attorney got my head so turned around that I testified the defendant actually kicked my ass when I tried to arrest her.
Richard Castle: What's wrong with that?
Javier Esposito: [embarrassed] The defendant was a seventy-five year old woman in a wheelchair. I lost all credibility with the jury.
Kevin Ryan: To this day, we pass the park where she feeds the birds, she snickers, turns to her nurse, and tells her the tale of how she got one over on poor old Javi.
Javier Esposito: Ms. Lucinda. I will get her one day.

Joanna Masters: Right over there. Behind the picture.
Roger Masters: Joanna, how could you?
Joanna Masters: Oh, please. I've been dying to know what you've been hiding in your safe for years now, Roger. And the fact that you didn't knock up Sadie doesn't mean you weren't knocking boots.
Roger Masters: If you think I'm opening that without a warrant, you're crazy.
Richard Castle: How long would it take to get us a warrant?
Kevin Ryan: An hour or two.
Richard Castle: We don't have that kind of time. Joanna, you're a fan of Nikki Heat.
Joanna Masters: Yeah, so?
Richard Castle: So how would you like to have a main character named after you in my next book?
Roger Masters: [she's tempted] Joanna, don't you dare.
Joanna Masters: How about a villain?
Richard Castle: Deal.

Kate Beckett: Great job, guys. You should be proud of yourselves.
Javier Esposito: Why? We blew it.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. For five months, we had an innocent woman rotting in jail.
Kate Beckett: No, that one's not on us. Nina's original defense attorney did that to her. At the end of the day, we're the ones who brought her justice.


"Castle: Cool Boys (#8.6)" (2015)
Kevin Ryan: What just happened?
Javier Esposito: Castle just stole our murder suspect. And our car.
[the suspect they have cuffed snickers]
Kevin Ryan, Javier Esposito: What are you laughing at?

Kevin Ryan: Did he tell you why he's not working gangs anymore?
Richard Castle: Yes. He said he got bored.
Kevin Ryan: No. He got demoted. He's under investigation for robbing a drug dealer.
Richard Castle: You robbed a drug dealer?
Det. Ethan Slaughter: Oh, hell, no. That's a B.S. charge.
Kevin Ryan: Slaughter's about to lose his pension, Castle. We figure that he teamed up with Victor to steal that chip, and then he got greedy.
Det. Ethan Slaughter: [taking Castle's phone] Give me that. Hey, detective, get your head out of our butt! Yeah, sure, I might have tuned Victor up a little bit, but I didn't kill him.You're wasting your time chasing after me. You should be after the kid.
[Slaughter throws the phone out of the car window]
Kevin Ryan: Hello?
Richard Castle: You know you can just take the SIM card out, right?
[sitting back in his seat, depressed]
Richard Castle: I lose more phones in this line of work.

Kevin Ryan: What happens when we don't get the car back to the motor pool at the end of our shift? I think we should call Beckett.
Javier Esposito: And tell her what? That her husband staged a jailbreak right under our noses?
Kevin Ryan: Well, technically, your nose. But that... that's not the point. We just need to find Castle and Slaughter.


"Castle: Home Is Where the Heart Stops (#1.7)" (2009)
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Why do you writers always call them "perps"?
Richard Castle: Isn't that what you call them?
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Ah, we've got a whole lot of names for them. Pipehead, pisshead, orc, creep,
NYPD Detective Javier Esposito: Crook, knucklehead, chucklehead,
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Churd, turd,
NYPD Detective Javier Esposito: Destro, scall,
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Skexy, slicko, slick,
NYPD Detective Javier Esposito: Mope,
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Sleekstak.
Richard Castle: [scribbling in his notepad] Slow down, slow down!
Kate Beckett: Suspects. We call them suspects.
Captain Roy Montgomery: I'm old school. I like dirtbag.
Richard Castle: Classic.

NYPD Detective Javier Esposito: [Working security at the fundraiser] Man, these guys are guilty of tax evasion not home invasion.
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Yeah, well
[sees Beckett in her formal dress]
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Appearances can be deceiving.
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: [to Beckett] Nice dress.
NYPD Detective Javier Esposito: Yeah, what there is of it.
NYPD Detective Kate Beckett: I'd let you borrow it, Esposito, but you stretched out the last one.

NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: [sneezes]
Richard Castle: [and Beckett at the same time] Bless you!
Richard Castle: Jinx!
Kate Beckett: What's with him?
NYPD Detective Javier Esposito: Goose-down. He's allergic.
Richard Castle: I'm sorry, but under the time-honored rules of jinx, you're not allowed to speak until I release you.
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: [sneezes]
Richard Castle: [and Beckett at the same time] Bless you!
Kate Beckett: Reverse double-jinx.
Richard Castle: But I...
Kate Beckett: Uh-uh Castle, mouth shut. Until I release you.


"Castle: Cloudy with a Chance of Murder (#5.2)" (2012)
Kate Beckett: [about Castle's date with Kristina] What's your point?
Kevin Ryan: Isn't it obvious? She's *totally* gonna put the moves on him.
Javier Esposito: No way. Not gonna happen.
Kate Beckett: Thank you. For actually showing some maturity.
Javier Esposito: He's totally gonna put the moves on *her*.
Kate Beckett: Don't you guys think that he's actually evolved beyond that by now?
Javier Esposito: He's a man. He has a pulse. So...
Javier Esposito, Kevin Ryan: No.

Javier Esposito: Castle, don't you have a date with Kristina Cottera tonight?
Richard Castle: Yes, I do. And...
[he checks his watch and jumps out of his chair]
Richard Castle: ...oh, crap. I'm late.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, well, don't let us keep you.
Richard Castle: [from her tone, he can tell something is bugging her] Uh... are you sure you're okay? You're okay with this?
Javier Esposito: Okay? Are you kidding? It's Kristina Cottera.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, besides, since when have you let cop work get in the way of your busy social life?
Kate Beckett: Yeah, go. Enjoy your date.
Richard Castle: Right. Okay.
[as he prepares to leave, he absent-mindedly says to Beckett... ]
Richard Castle: I'll call you later.
[he leaves; after a moment, he sticks his head back in]
Richard Castle: To check on the case.

Kate Beckett: I just got off the phone with Mandy's parents. They said that she spent most of her time at work. There was no boyfriend, and they have no idea why she was in the park.
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] Hey, guys. Check this out. I was going through Mandy's purse, and I found this folded up in her wallet.
[he hands Castle an evidence baggie with a handwritten note inside]
Richard Castle: "If any of this gets out, I'll kill you." I'm gonna go ahead and say she was being threatened.


"Castle: Cops & Robbers (#4.7)" (2011)
Kate Beckett: Esposito! There's a 10-30, New Amsterdam Bank and Trust on Lex. Call Dispatch.
Kevin Ryan: 10-30? Since when are we handling bank robbery calls?
Kate Beckett: Castle's there.

Javier Esposito: I don't get it. This is a little old retired librarian. What could possibly be in her safe deposit box that would be worth all this?
Kevin Ryan: Nazi gold, cold fusion, map to Atlantis.
Javier Esposito: Hey! Castle junior. Could you maybe start thinking like a cop, please?

Richard Castle: So he uses his military connections to hire that team of mercenaries in the bank. And then to avoid loose ends, Ron rigged the C-4 to blow early.
Javier Esposito: Talk about cold blooded.
Kate Beckett: And he did all of this just for the contents of Agnes' safety deposit box? Castle, you said that there were photos and letters in there, right?
Richard Castle: Yeah. Trapper John must have given them to Ron when he was being escorted back from the restroom. Because right after that, he faked a seizure and was let go.
Kate Beckett: But why? I mean, what was so special about his former mother-in-law's safety deposit box?
Richard Castle: Former mother-in-law?
Javier Esposito: Yeah, Ron was married to Agnes' daughter, Tanya. Both her and her son, Connor, were killed in a boating accident about a year ago.
Richard Castle: No, no, Ron spoke about Connor, and he did not speak about him like he was dead. Connor is still alive.
Javier Esposito: Well, I don't know what to tell you, Castle, it says right here Connor's dead.
Kevin Ryan: I'm not so sure about that. Turns out that neither his wife, Tanya, nor Connor's body was ever recovered.
Richard Castle: Why would the wife fake their deaths?
Kevin Ryan: Domestic abuse. However, Ron had the connections and the wealth to avoid prosecution.
Richard Castle: So the system failed her. She and Connor couldn't escape Ron's abuse, so she faked their deaths and disappeared.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, but to disappear, she had to walk away from her former life.
Richard Castle: Sever ties with everything and everyone she ever knew.
Kate Beckett: Except she couldn't, especially with her mom, Agnes.
Richard Castle: Which is what the safety deposit box was for. It's a means of communication. It's like a Cold War drop box in some John le Carré novel. Only Tanya wouldn't be able to risk making the drops. So who would make the drops for her?
Kevin Ryan: Our mystery man, who was posing as Agnes' dead husband. He was Tanya's middleman.
Kate Beckett: Okay, so Tanya sends the photos and the letters to the middleman. The middleman puts them in the safety deposit box for Agnes. The box serves as a mailbox.
Richard Castle: Only it's better than a mailbox 'cause it's locked up inside a bank.
Kevin Ryan: Ron must have suspected that they fake their deaths, and that's when he bugged Agnes' home.
Javier Esposito: And when Ron found out about the box, he killed Agnes for the key.
Richard Castle: Right, and with the clock ticking, he hired that crew to stage the bank robbery to get to the box with that key.
Kate Beckett: You know, those photos and letters will say exactly where his wife and son are hiding. He's on his way there now, and we know what he's gonna do once he gets there.
Richard Castle: He's gonna kidnap his son and kill his wife.


"Castle: Undead Again (#4.22)" (2012)
Richard Castle: Charlie has not been wrong yet. Maybe our killer is patient zero, other there right now on the streets of New York building an army of the undead.
Kate Beckett: Castle, what we are looking for is not a zombie but a very smart criminal who murdered David Locke and is now making our only witness look crazy. And he also dressed up in makeup and a costume to hide his identity.
[Gestures to photo]
Richard Castle: Unless that's not costume or makeup.
Kevin Ryan: I mean, he does look like a real zombie.
Javier Esposito: A real zombie? I'm embarrassed for you, bro.
Kate Beckett: Okay, then explain this. Why would a zombie go after a currency trader, at 4AM, in a garage?
Richard Castle: This one's easy. The more intelligent the victim, the more delicious the brains.

Kevin Ryan: [Escorting witnesses dressed as zombies out of the interrogation room] Alright, ladies, thanks for your help.
Javier Esposito: [Gesturing to one woman] Don't know about those shoes with that top. I'm just sayin'. I woulda went open toed.

Kevin Ryan: Castle, do you really believe in all this zombie stuff? Because I would swear on my nana's grave that Kyle Jennings was dead.
Richard Castle: No. You know what I do believe in? Driving Beckett crazy.


"Castle: Clear & Present Danger (#7.3)" (2014)
Kevin Ryan: Hmmm. What's this?
[Reading a note left with a box on his desk]
Kevin Ryan: Time you had a proper uniform. Love, Javi.
Javier Esposito: It's from the heart, bro.
Kevin Ryan: Okay.
[Opens the box and pulls out a thong that says 'Security' on it]
Javier Esposito: Too big?

Kevin Ryan: Beckett, what would you do if you were invisible?
Kate Beckett: I'd walk out of here without having to file this report.
Kevin Ryan: Hmm. Boring.
Kate Beckett: Yeah. I know.
Javier Esposito: What about you, Castle?
Richard Castle: Be a fly on the wall, see what Beckett's dad really thinks of me.

[learning Ryan has been moonlighting as a bouncer at a male strip club, Esposito gives him a thong as a gag gift]
Kevin Ryan: Want to help me try it on?
Javier Esposito: Wait...
[Ryan sticks the thong under Espo's nose]
Javier Esposito: [getting a whiff] Eww... they told me it was new.
Kevin Ryan: [Espo hurries away, Ryan on his heels] I could really use your help. What? Blue is my color. What's wrong with you?


"Castle: Deep in Death (#2.1)" (2009)
NYPD Captain Roy Montgomery: [after the morgue... mobile is hit by a car, Lanie the Medical Examiner is seeing if Castle is okay] Well?
Lanie Parish: [after flashing a light in Castle's eyes and pinching his ear] He'll live.
Kevin Ryan: What, no brain damage?
Lanie Parish: If he has some, it happened before tonight and it was probably self-inflicted.
Richard Castle: Ahh, good times.

Richard Castle: [a body is up in a tree] It's raining men.
Lanie Parish: Castle, what are you doing here?
Kate Beckett: Don't worry, we're still mad at him.
Kevin Ryan: [to Esposito] Guy in a tree, Mom and Dad bickering, seems like old times.

Kate Beckett: [at an underground poker game, Castle has asked for $20,000 in chips] No, no, no, no, no! What's he doing?
Kevin Ryan: Dropping half my yearly salary like it was pocket change.


"Castle: Swan Song (#5.7)" (2012)
Kate Beckett: [Seeing Ryan and Esposito come in with a suspect] Hey, is that our stalker?
Javier Esposito: Ex stalker. He won't be seein' daylight any time soon.
Kevin Ryan: LT, could you please take him to the interrogation room? Thank you.
Javier Esposito: [Directly to the camera] You should watch from observation while I tear this guy apart.
Kate Beckett: So... uh... we like this guy?
Kevin Ryan: We found blood stained overalls in his van. We sent 'em to be tested, see if they match the blood from our vic.
Javier Esposito: [Hard edged and over the top] Oh, they match. Trust me, bro. You don't have to worry about this creep hurtin' anyone ever again.
[Directly to the camera again]
Javier Esposito: That's a gift from me to you. You're welcome, America.

Captain Victoria Gates: Are we close on locating Campbell?
Kevin Ryan: Well, his picture is out to all patrol cars citywide, and I've sent his photograph to all the hotels in our database.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, but the trouble is he uses aliases in order to stay off the DEA's radar.
Captain Victoria Gates: Well, why's the DEA interested in him?
Kevin Ryan: The Church of Wildly Enlightenment isn't just your friendly neighborhood cult. It's also a twenty-acre pot farm, run by the 300 plus members, all for Campbell's personal profit.
Captain Victoria Gates: Why don't the feds shut him down?
Kevin Ryan: They've tried. Something about freedom of religious expression.

Kate Beckett: Lanie's got something she wants us to see.
Richard Castle: Lanie? Who's Lanie?
[he gives her a look urging her to play to the cameras]
Kate Beckett: [awkwardly] Uh... Lanie is our medical examiner and she works at the morgue, and she's got information that she wants us to see and we are keeping her waiting.
Kevin Ryan: [as Beckett leaves] Still a little stiff.
Richard Castle: Certainly she could tighten that up. But she's getting better.


"Castle: Watershed (#5.24)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: Here's what I don't get. Why go through all the trouble of creating a fake persona when you're just gonna be on your laptop all night?
Richard Castle: Wait. Does the Cedric have wi-fi?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. That's about all it has.
Richard Castle: Computer science major? Hours on her laptop?
Kate Beckett: She's a hacker. Which is why she was staying at the Cedric. She could pay in cash and remain anonymous while she was using the IP address.
Richard Castle: Exactly. And whatever she was hacking into is either so illegal or so dangerous she had to make sure they couldn't trace it back to her. And even if they did trace it back to her, they'd still have to find her amongst hundreds of residents.
Kate Beckett: So she created a whole false persona, and who's gonna look twice at a runaway hooker? I mean, she's like the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.
Richard Castle: Only they did find her, which is why we can't find her laptop. Whoever she went up against killed her and took it.
Javier Esposito: Uh, problem. We don't know who she went up against, and none of her friends seem to know, either.
Kate Beckett: Okay. Contact the Cedric's Internet provider and get a list of all the IP addresses accessed by residents over the past two weeks. There's gotta be an answer somewhere in there.

Richard Castle: Three deaths, all leading back to the law firm of Banks and Bauer. Is it just me, or is this starting to smell like a John Grisham novel? A single car accident with no witnesses? Guys, this is a classic conspiracy cover-up. Though only a lowly intern, Pam stumbles onto something the firm is doing; something big, nefarious. She has to be silenced, only after the accident, Blaylock can't take the guilt, or admit the truth. So his only bastion is to escape into the sweet oblivion of drugs.
Kate Beckett: And then when Erica starts coming around, they realize that they're gonna have to act by eliminating them both. But what are they covering up?
Kevin Ryan: Whatever it is, the only possible evidence is on Erica's laptop, which our killer took.
Richard Castle: Yeah.
[a thought strikes him]
Richard Castle: Wait, are we sure about that? Erica was meeting Blaylock on the roof, right? A guy who, according to the e-mails, she didn't know very well. If I'm Erica, I'm hiding that laptop.
Javier Esposito: Well, we searched her room. It wasn't there.
Kate Beckett: Wait. Do you guys remember the footage from the elevator?
Richard Castle: Yes. She went down to the laundry room first.
Kate Beckett: And Lanie said that she found traces of creosote under her fingernails from the boiler room next door.
Richard Castle, Kate Beckett: The laptop's in the basement.

Kate Beckett: [after questioning a suspect] He's prepared to give a statement implicating his brother in both murders as well as the accident. Would you guys mind taking it?
Javier Esposito: Yo, Kate.
Kate Beckett: Yeah?
Javier Esposito: What's up?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, what's going on?
Kate Beckett: Look, there's something that I have to tell you guys, but there's someone else that I have to tell first.


"Castle: Death Gone Crazy (#5.12)" (2013)
Kate Beckett: You got anything?
Kevin Ryan: Well, um... I never thought I'd say this after graduating the sixth grade, but our bra research is in.

Javier Esposito: Yo. How's the "inbreastigation" going?
Kevin Ryan: And that's why you're still single.

Scarlet Jones: Last week, there was this guy in Midtown. He practically attacked Beau in the street, saying that he would make Beau pay for whatever it was he did.
Richard Castle: Do you know who this guy was?
Scarlet Jones: No, but he got in Beau's face. And he was yelling at Beau, saying he had double crossed him. He got physical, so I, uh, stepped in.
Richard Castle: And then what?
Scarlet Jones: Broke his nose and a couple of ribs, I think.
Javier Esposito: [in the observation room with Ryan] Ooh, did you hear that? She broke his nose.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. So?
Javier Esposito: So, that's hot.
Kevin Ryan: [giving him a weird look] Who are you?


"Castle: Reality Star Struck (#5.14)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: Hey. Sorry I'm late.
Javier Esposito: Yeah? Jenny again?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah... her temperature has spiked this morning and suddenly it's show time. She's got this baby-making down to a science.
Richard Castle: Sounds romantic.
Kevin Ryan: I feel like a rooster in a hen house, except for there's only one hen. A very bossy hen.

Captain Victoria Gates: Bob and Penelope fake their breakup and now poor, sweet, innocent Stone's a killer? Is there anything real on that reality show?
Kevin Ryan: Just the headache I get when I watch it.


"Castle: Vampire Weekend (#2.6)" (2009)
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: [at Castle's Halloween party, Ryan says to Castle] You throw a great shindig for a 19th-century poet, Mr. Poe.

NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Vampire Mistress Vixen. Her coven is called the Den of Iniquity.
Javier Esposito: Coven?
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: Yeah, vampire coven is like joining a church or a club. "You like to play golf? I like to play golf", "You like to drink blood? I like to drink blood."
[Beckett, Castle, and Esposito all give him strange looks]
NYPD Detective Kevin Ryan: What? I... I used to date a girl who was into the lifestyle.
Javier Esposito: What happened? Did the relationship suck?


"Castle: Demons (#4.6)" (2011)
Richard Castle: I don't know, but I think it's time we found out.
Kate Beckett: Knock yourself out, Castle.
Richard Castle: You're not coming?
Kate Beckett: No. I've got a murder to solve.
Kevin Ryan: I'll go.
Richard Castle: [Talking about Beckett] Oh. That's a look.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah.
Richard Castle: I get these a lot. Just start walking. Faster.

Pete Benton: Matt had a terrible temper. He was convinced Melanie was cheating on him.
Kate Beckett: Was she?
Pete Benton: Wouldn't surprise me if she was. Matt thought it was somebody at work.
Kevin Ryan: [At the precinct] It wasn't someone Melanie worked with. I just tracked down George Banner, Melanie's manager at Flywide Travel from 20 years ago. He said Melanie had two coworkers, both guys.
Richard Castle: Aha.
Kevin Ryan: Married.
Richard Castle: Still.
Kevin Ryan: To each other.
Richard Castle: Oh.


"Castle: Linchpin (#4.16)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: What do you think this is about, huh?
Javier Esposito: Smells like an intelligence op.
Kevin Ryan: CIA? NSA? DHS?
Javier Esposito: Same letters, different alphabet. I had some buddies from the service volunteer for intelligence ops.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, how'd they like it?
Javier Esposito: They all died.

Kate Beckett: Anything on the warehouse?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, right after you guys left the feds showed up and shut us down.
Javier Esposito: But we did find something on your vic, Nelson Blakely. His prints came back as a Scott McGregor from Long Island City.
Kevin Ryan: Problem is McGregor seems to only exist on paper. We can't find any trace of him in the real world.
Kate Beckett: Did you guys send units to the listed address?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, and the family living there had never heard of him. And no one recognized his photo.
Kate Beckett: Well, someone must have known him.
Richard Castle: Someone did. He plays chess. That's not a solo sport.
Kate Beckett: I thought you were off the case.
Richard Castle: Well, you heard what Sophia said. I'm a reckless, immature, self-centered jackass. If you're stubborn enough to keep going, I'm stupid enough to go with you.


"Castle: Time Will Tell (#6.5)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: So, according to Shauna's supervisor, all of her parolees were nonviolent offenders, and none of them look like this sketch that we took off the neighbor, or matched prints that CSU got from the crime scene.
Kate Beckett: So it's quite possible this had nothing to do with her job.
Richard Castle: Then why torture? What could the killer want?
Kevin Ryan: What, Castle, no crazy theories?
Kate Beckett: Oh, he's got bigger issues. His daughter's moving in with a boy.
Kevin Ryan: And you're letting her?
Richard Castle: Well, apparently, the only way to stop her is locking her up. But according to Miss By-the-Book here, that's unlawful imprisonment.

Kate Beckett: Castle?
Richard Castle: Yeah.
Kate Beckett: For the sake of our future, please tell me you don't believe that guy.
Richard Castle: Oh, no. But you got to admit, it's a great story.
Kate Beckett: [approaching with Esposito] Really? Uh... thought it was kind of derivative.
Javier Esposito: Yeah. Like a mash-up of "Twelve Monkeys" and "Terminator".
Richard Castle: Yeah, but it's the way he told it. Total commitment.
Kate Beckett: Commitment that turned deadly. I mean, to maintain his delusion Shauna had to die. He might not even know that he killed her.
Richard Castle: Hey, did you guys find out what this device was Doyle had on him?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Techs said it's just a bunch of junk thrown together.
Javier Esposito: What were you expecting, Castle? Time travel device? Doctor Who's sonic screwdriver?
Richard Castle: You watch "Doctor Who"?
Kate Beckett: [her phone chirps] Oh, that's Lanie.
[to Ryan and Esposito]
Kate Beckett: Okay, we'll hit the morgue. Why don't you guys time travel over to your desks and let the D.A. know that we got our killer.


"Castle: Head Case (#4.3)" (2011)
Richard Castle: Missing body, killers who literally cover their tracks... anyone else getting a quick strike assassin squad vibe?
Kevin Ryan: Oh c'mon Castle, you're not saying it's some type of black ops job?
Richard Castle: I'm not saying it. The evidence is saying it. I'm betting this guy's buried at sea by now.
Kate Beckett: Lanie, there's an imprint in the blood.
Lanie Parish: Yeah, it looks like a box or a case.
Kate Beckett: Might have been our victim's.
Richard Castle: Nuclear launch codes, probably.

Kevin Ryan: So, not only is Beau Randolph the proud owner of a Smith & Wesson .45 automatic...
Kate Beckett: Which is a large enough caliber to have created that entry wound in our victim.
Kevin Ryan: ...he also has a carry permit.
Richard Castle: [outraged] What? *I* couldn't even get a carry permit! How did he get one?
Kevin Ryan: The hard way. Several guys saw their girlfriends in his videos and beat the hell out of him.
Richard Castle: [turning to Beckett] No longer jealous.


"Castle: Room 147 (#6.16)" (2014)
Kate Beckett: Did you get ahold of next of kin?
Kevin Ryan: Not yet, but I did find out about our victim through his personal website.
Kate Beckett: He's got his own website?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, he was an actor. A struggling one, judging by his credits.
Richard Castle: [reading a flier] Justin Marquette is a member of the Rooster Theater Company, and is currently appearing in their Off-Off-Off-Broadway production of Chekhov's "Platonov". That's a lot of "offs".

Precinct Detective: [bringing in a third suspect] Detective, we got another one.
Kate Beckett: Another what?
Dwight Carruthers: I'm Dwight Carruthers, CPA. I'm here to turn myself in. For killing Justin Marquette.
Kate Beckett: No...
Richard Castle: All right, this is now officially outstanding.
Kevin Ryan: [entering] Hey. You guys need to see this.
Dwight Carruthers: [Beckett and Castle follow Ryan] Wait, I... I need to confess!
Kate Beckett: [under her breath] Yeah, take a number.


"Castle: Nikki Heat (#3.11)" (2011)
Kevin Ryan: [watching Natalie, who is dressed like Beckett, in the bullpen] We really should have a code word so we all know which Beckett to kill when her clone army attacks.
Kate Beckett: Unless we make a preemptive strike.

[Castle, Beckett, and Ryan are huddled together in the break room]
Javier Esposito: What are you guys doing?
Kevin Ryan: Hiding from creepy Beckett.


"Castle: I, Witness (#7.13)" (2015)
Kevin Ryan: Wait, we're looking into Scott Galloway now? Why?
Javier Esposito: Thought everything pointed to Cole Whitfield being the killer.
Kate Beckett: It does.
Kevin Ryan: So you believe this theory of Castle's?
Kate Beckett: I believe that he's been right too many times not to consider it.

Kevin Ryan: What'd you think of Stacy?
Javier Esposito: Oh, man, she was... great.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah?
Javier Esposito: Until I started getting the stalker vibe from her.
Kevin Ryan: [feigning ignorance] What?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. We were right in the middle of appetizers, and that's when she told me that the blue shorts I was wearing during the triathalon made my legs look sexy. Which is true, but how did she even know I competed? Never mind what color shorts I was wearing. And that's when she told me that she saw the photo on my profile.
[Ryan snickers]
Javier Esposito: Oh, this is funny to you? You signed me up for Match.com? Behind my back?
Kevin Ryan: Well, technically, Jenny did.


"Castle: Heartbreak Hotel (#4.8)" (2011)
Javier Esposito: Castle's right. I mean, since we're going to be there, we might as well consider the Sapphire as a potential bachelor party venue.
Richard Castle: I'm so happy you said that, because there are a number of establishments down there that cater to bachelor party events. I think maybe we should take a little sampling.
Kevin Ryan: No, no, no. We are not sampling any clubs.
Javier Esposito: What? C'mon, bro. Why are you stallin' us on this?
Kevin Ryan: Look Javier, I -
[sighs]
Kevin Ryan: I got some bad news.
[Esposito glances at him]
Kevin Ryan: ... I had to ask Jenny's half-brother Nelson to be my best man.
Javier Esposito: [Outraged] Nelson? That guy I met at your birthday party? 16 with braces? Couldn't stop talking about being a mathlete?
Kevin Ryan: It was a family thing. I - I didn't have a choice.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, you did.
Richard Castle: Actually, when it comes to weddings, you don't. Trust me, you do not want to start a marriage with a family feud.
[There's a brief silence]
Javier Esposito: This sucks.
Kevin Ryan: I know.
Javier Esposito: And I was going to give you an awesome sendoff, bro.
Kevin Ryan: I know.
Richard Castle: Well boys, I'm sorry. I'm sorry it had to come to this. I didn't want it to, but it looks like we have no choice. There is no other way. IBPWOC. Impromptu bachelor party while on case!

Javier Esposito: Women. You sure you want to spend the rest of your life with one?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, yeah. Mine likes me.
Richard Castle: [chuckling] Ooh, speaking of Atlantic City, perfect place for a bachelor party.
Javier Esposito: Ooh, that's what I'm talking about, bro. We could rent one of these right there, hit the casino, maybe the club...
Kevin Ryan: I was thinking more along the lines of... camping trip.
Richard Castle: [laughs, then stops] Oh, you were... oh.
Javier Esposito: First of all, no. Second, it's not up to you. The bachelor party is strictly best man territory. And by the way, your big date is what, like two months away? So you need to officially tell the guy so that he can start planning something.
Kevin Ryan: I still got some time. Uh, I'm gonna go check on those cameras.
Javier Esposito: What the... did you see that? He just sidestepped me. What's that about?
Richard Castle: It's almost as though the thought of marriage fills him with an impending sense of doom.
[laughs]
Richard Castle: Oh, no, wait. That's me.


"Castle: The Double Down (#2.2)" (2009)
[Beckett, Esposito, and Ryan are stuck on their respective cases]
Kate Beckett: We've been over these cases so many times, it's hard to see straight anymore. All right. We'll start over. Fresh eyes. You take our murder, we'll take yours.
Javier Esposito: All right.
Richard Castle: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Say that again.
Kate Beckett: You take our murder, we'll take yours.
Richard Castle: Could it be that easy? "You take mine, I'll take yours."
Javier Esposito: What are you getting at, Castle?
Richard Castle: "Strangers on a Train".
Kevin Ryan: The Hitchcock movie?
Richard Castle: I'm partial to the novel by Patricia Highsmith, but yes. We have two strong suspects, but with airtight alibis, right?
[Castle takes pictures of suspects off the murder board]
Javier Esposito: Right.
Richard Castle: We know they're connected. What if the connection is the killers?
Kate Beckett: Jason and Eric committed each other's murders.
Richard Castle: And made sure they had an airtight alibi for the murder they knew they'd be suspected of. It's not our victims who are connected. It's our murderers. Crisscross!

Kevin Ryan: How you doing, Dr. Perlmutter?
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Shh. The body is speaking.
Javier Esposito: What's it saying?
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: It's saying "Someone shot me". One to the midsection... 38, maybe even a .45. He was shot at close range and from behind.
Javier Esposito: That's cold.
M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Yeah, well, that's the living for you.


"Castle: The Good, the Bad & the Baby (#6.10)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: Our baby's due in a month, and I can't stop it. What if I'm really not ready?
Javier Esposito: Well, you're not ready.
Kevin Ryan: What?
Javier Esposito: Nobody is. Look, being a dad is like being a cop. Doesn't matter what they teach you in the academy, you learn on the streets. You did okay with that, right?
Kevin Ryan: Uh... my first day, I was so nervous I rear-ended a SWAT van and ten guys in vests poured out, ready to take me down with extreme prejudice.
Javier Esposito: Well... you care. That already makes you a hundred times better than the dad I had.

[Castle and Beckett enter the precinct dead on their feet after taking care of Cosmo all night]
Kevin Ryan: Whoa! You two look like you got hit by the milk truck.
Richard Castle: You see this face? This is the face of your future.
Javier Esposito: That bad, huh?
Richard Castle: No, no, no. We slept like babies.
Kate Beckett: Yeah. Up every hour.


"Castle: Private Eye Caramba! (#7.12)" (2015)
Kevin Ryan: So, a tech went over that USB drive. Turns out it's a dondle.
Richard Castle, Javier Esposito: Ohhhhhh... What's a dondle?
Kevin Ryan: It's basically an encrypted security key.
Javier Esposito: That unlocks what?
Kevin Ryan: The tech plugged it in. It routed them to an anonymous numbered back account in Switzerland... with a balance of one hundred million.
Javier Esposito: A hundred million bucks?
Richard Castle: I shoulda charged way more to find that purse.

Javier Esposito: This is the murder weapon. It's a length of plumber's pipe. There's a bunch of scrap pieces in that trash bin over there.
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] Hey. Our perp may have argued with her before he took that swing. Neighbors said they overheard some loud voices coming from outside right around the time of death; a man and a woman's.
Kate Beckett: So maybe this was spontaneous. A crime of passion committed by someone she knew.
Kevin Ryan: [theorizing like Castle] Or... she might have been killed by a psychotic plumber lying in wait.
Javier Esposito: That your Castle theory?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah.
Javier Esposito: It needs work.


"Castle: One Man's Treasure (#2.10)" (2009)
Kate Beckett: Yeah, well, never underestimate the fragility of the male ego.
Kevin Ryan: Oh, see? That's just a stero...
Richard Castle: Don't. Don't. That's... She's baiting us, all right? Just ignore her and she'll lose her witchy powers.
Kate Beckett: You wish.

Kate Beckett: [Castle is plugging his nose to block the smell of decomposing trash] What are you doing?
Richard Castle: Well, I can't breathe through my nose. I happen to have a very acute sense of smell.
Kate Beckett: Suck it up, Castle. Real cops deal with worse.
Lanie Parish: Yeah, not to mention medical examiners. Do you know how long I have to shower before heading out on a date?
Richard Castle: No, but if you need someone to time it for you, I'd be happy to...
Kevin Ryan: [sticking his arm up out of the dumpster, holding a wallet] Found it!
[Ryan climbs out of the dumpster]
Kevin Ryan: It must have fallen out of his jacket on the way down.
Kate Beckett: [checking the driver's license] Yeah, that's our guy. All right, the name is Sam Parker, and the driver's license has his address placed in Connecticut.
Kevin Ryan: Maybe he's visiting someone in the building.
Richard Castle: You mean dropping by?


"Castle: Heroes and Villains (#4.2)" (2011)
Kevin Ryan: Larceny, assault, fraud... you name it, Tyler Faris has done it. Still, nobody deserves ending up like that.
Javier Esposito: He got what was coming to him.
Kevin Ryan: Dude. That's for the criminal justice system to decide.
Javier Esposito: Maybe a sword is a justice system.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, if you're Quentin Tarantino, maybe.

Kevin Ryan: Uniforms widened their canvass. Still can't find anyone that knows our mystery man.
Javier Esposito: Ah, whoever he is, I can't connect him to any swords, either. I pray we nail this dude before I have to call every store on that list.
Kevin Ryan: I thought you were kind of rooting for this guy?
Javier Esposito: That's when he was Joe Citizen taking it to the bad guys. Now he's just some nimrod in a suit.
Kevin Ryan: Ah. You gotta give him props for spirit, though, right? I mean, haven't you ever wanted to be a superhero? Going out there, prowling the city, knocking some heads?
Javier Esposito: I do that now.


"Castle: An Embarrassment of Bitches (#4.13)" (2012)
Kate Beckett: [having agreed to temporarily keep the victim's dog at the precinct] There's got to be some food for him at Francisco's place. Who wants to make a run for it?
Javier Esposito: [derisive snort] To go get dog food?
[Beckett nods]
Javier Esposito: Castle.
Richard Castle: Ryan.
Kevin Ryan: Esposito.

Kate Beckett: We have reason to suspect that our killer was wearing your perfume.
Kay Cappuccio: Well, that's impossible. It wasn't even out yet. I'm the only person who had it.
Kevin Ryan: [watching with Esposito in the observation room] Does she realize she just incriminated herself?
Javier Esposito: I said she was nice. Didn't say anything about smart.


"Castle: The Limey (#4.20)" (2012)
Richard Castle: [Castle wheels in a white board] OK boys, here it is.
Kevin Ryan: Here's what?
Richard Castle: My foolproof plan for getting Nigel's fingerprint. Nigel lives in a high-rise apartment, here on Park Avenue.
Javier Esposito: High security.
Richard Castle: Exactly. Ryan, you'll be here, front door, dressed as a flower delivery boy. Esposito, you'll be here, dressed as a hobo.
Javier Esposito: Question: why does the brown man gotta be the hobo?
Richard Castle: You want the flowers?
Javier Esposito: Hobo it is.
Richard Castle: You guys will cause a distraction here, while I... rapelle down the side of the building, with Nikolai.
Kevin Ryan: Who's Nikolai?
Richard Castle: He's a Romanian gymnast I met on YouTube. He's extremely flexible, and fits right in the duffle bag, with a glass cutter.

Colin Hunt: [approaching Castle, Ryan, and Esposito in a sharp-looking tuxedo] Excuse me, gents. Has anyone seen Detective Beckett?
[Beckett enters in a fancy dress]
Kevin Ryan: Wow. Uh... you guys going out?
Colin Hunt: I pulled some strings and got us into a party at the British consulate tonight.
Kate Beckett: Nigel will be there. We'll get his prints and he won't even know it.
Colin Hunt: Cheers, lads.
[Beckett and Colin leave]
Kevin Ryan: Or they could do that.
Richard Castle: Yeah, sure, if you want to do it the easy way.


"Castle: Countdown (#3.17)" (2011)
Richard Castle: How'd you find us?
Javier Esposito: Oh, Alexis called. Said you didn't come home.
Richard Castle: Alexis? She's supposed to be out of town.
Javier Esposito: I guess she came back. We figured you were with Beckett, until Josh called.
Kevin Ryan: We thought you must be out there doing something incredibly stupid against orders, so we sent patrol units everywhere we figured you'd be moronic enough to go. Found Beckett's car, and searched the area until we found the light from the storage container.
Richard Castle: Well, I'm glad my stupidity's predictable.

Richard Castle: [after talking with Fallon] Man, does that guy take jackhole lessons or was he born that way?
Kevin Ryan: Neither. I asked my buddy at DHS about him. Turns out his wife was killed on 9/11. She rode the second tower down; they were on the phone together when it happened.


"Castle: Last Action Hero (#7.9)" (2014)
Kevin Ryan: Let's say he was all wired up, with a briefcase of money. What the hell was he doing?
Javier Esposito: It's like Lance was running some kind of half-assed sting operation.
Kate Beckett: [approaching] Maybe he was. I spoke to Narcotics; the club that Lance went to is a major hub for drug sales. Run by a guy that you're familiar with, Castle.
Richard Castle: [Beckett hands him a DMV photo] Is... is that Henry Allen Boothe?
Javier Esposito: El Jefe from "Hard Kill"?
Richard Castle: He made a career out of playing drug dealers, and then he quit acting.
Kate Beckett: And then he began living the part. Apparently, he spent so much time with drug dealers, researching his roles, that he actually became one. Narcotics hasn't been able to make a case against him, though.
Richard Castle: This is just like "Hard Kill". Where Rico Cruze took down El Jefe; only now it's one actor taking on the other actor, but the other actor actually happens to be a drug dealer.
[exasperated, he takes a deep breath]
Kevin Ryan: But, again, why would Lance do this? Why would he go after Booth?
Richard Castle: I don't know! But it's so meta; we should really talk to El Jefe.

Kevin Ryan: Hey, guys. I just found something very interesting.
Richard Castle: The identity of the killer.
Kevin Ryan: No, not that.


"Castle: Famous Last Words (#2.7)" (2009)
Richard Castle: Do you still have truant officers?
Roy Montgomery: [shrugs] Budget cuts.
Richard Castle: You are so lucky.
Javier Esposito: Found your stalker. Franco Marquez, AKA Frankie Markie. Hayley filed half a dozen complaints against him. Says here that he even tried to break into her apartment and when she filed against him he showed up in court and called her a...
[stops, looks at Castle and Alexis]
Javier Esposito: B-I-T-C-H.
Richard Castle: She can spell, Detective.
Kevin Ryan: Probably better then you!

Kevin Ryan: Hey. So, I just took a report from the receiving officer at the 20th precinct. He recognized Hayley from the news.
Detective Kate Beckett: And?
Kevin Ryan: He says Hayley showed up at their door to file a report the day she went missing.
Richard Castle: About what?
Kevin Ryan: He doesn't know. She asked to speak with a detective; by the time the receiving officer found one, she'd skipped out.
Javier Esposito: There's only one reason you go to the cops: to report a crime.
Detective Kate Beckett: Or to get help because you think you're in danger.


"Castle: Secret's Safe with Me (#5.3)" (2012)
Richard Castle: You know what I love about this case?
Kevin Ryan: What's that?
Richard Castle: Finding a pretty pink bracelet in my belongings.
Kevin Ryan: You know you're gonna have to return that thing...
Richard Castle: I know, Ryan! I know that. I ju... can't you let me have this moment? This one, small "Treasure Island"/Indiana Jones moment?
Kevin Ryan: Sorry. Go ahead.
Richard Castle: Well, it's too late now. It's ruined.

Kevin Ryan: Hey, guys, mother lode. Tax returns. Looks like Johan Fleming's actually Wendell Dupree.
Kate Beckett: That's the same last name as our victim.
Richard Castle: Yes, and the same date of birth, too. They must be twins.
[realization dawns on him]
Richard Castle: Wait. Twins. Of course. It all makes sense now. Wendell's secret identity, Johan Fleming, is the same secret identity of Zan, the male half of the Wonder Twins.
[Beckett, Ryan, and Esposito all look at him blankly]
Richard Castle: Wonder Twins. The Super Friends? Seriously, you guys, do you not watch TV?
Javier Esposito: [changing the subject] If this unit belonged to her brother, then why was Wendy bidding on it?
Kevin Ryan: And why did he stop making payments? And why was he using an alias?
Kate Beckett: Why don't we track down Wendell and ask him?
Richard Castle: [under his breath, as he and Beckett leave] One of you buy a TV.


"Castle: 3XK (#3.6)" (2010)
Kate Beckett: I see domestic complaints by the double digits...
Richard Castle: Filed by his wife.
Kevin Ryan: Ex-wife. They were divorced last month after being married for four years.
Richard Castle: So in a way, he did just get out of prison.

Kevin Ryan: You were right about Gates. He did try to go after Donna, but she's okay.
Jerry Tyson: And Gates?
Kevin Ryan: He confessed. It's all over.
Jerry Tyson: Thank god.
Richard Castle: Aren't you gonna ask what happened? To your girlfriend, Donna. You didn't ask about her. You just asked about Gates. Doesn't make any sense, unless...
[realization dawns on him]
Richard Castle: ...she was supposed to die.
Jerry Tyson: I... I don't know what you...
Richard Castle: McCardle didn't get the money for the surgery until after you got out of prison. He's removing all evidence he was even there. It was him all along. He's the real Triple Killer.
[Ryan moves to draw his weapon, but Tyson knocks him out, picks up his weapon, and holds it on Castle]
Jerry Tyson: Guilty as charged.


"Castle: The Greater Good (#6.19)" (2014)
Richard Castle: You know, there's a good argument for keeping the list really small. Just immediate family.
Kate Beckett: This argument doesn't have something to do with a certain amusement park ride, does it?
Richard Castle: I'm being serious. Getting married is an intimate act, and our ceremony should reflect that intimacy. And that way, we could all fit into one car. Ryan! How do you feel about roller coasters?
Kevin Ryan: Ooh, make me nauseous. Why?
Kate Beckett: No reason.

Richard Castle: Good news. I cross-referenced my mother's list with my list. We have three names in common.
Kate Beckett: Wow, three names. That's great. That takes us from what, 585 to 582? There's gotta be a better way to cut this down. Ryan, you guys kept your wedding small. What was it, like a hundred people?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. That's all we could afford.
Richard Castle: How did you... contain the list?
Kevin Ryan: I have a lot of relatives who hate me now.


"Castle: Knockout (#3.24)" (2011)
Richard Castle: Who's Napolitano?
Kevin Ryan: Oh, he worked with Raglan on a couple of drug busts. But he was at his daughter's wedding the night Bob Armen was shot, so he's not our third cop.
Richard Castle: Where is he now?
Javier Esposito: He died of heart failure, back in 1993. Why are you asking about Napolitano?
Richard Castle: Uh... he and Raglan are listed as the arresting officers on this report. But... this has been altered.
Javier Esposito: What?
Kevin Ryan: How can you tell?
Richard Castle: Because I know typewriters. Older typewriters use cloth ribbon. If you look closely, you can see the striations in the typeface. Newer typewriters use film ribbon. Someone whited-out the assisting officer's name on this report, photocopied it, and then typed in Napolitano's name. It's a cover-up, literally.
Javier Esposito: I'll be damned.

Kevin Ryan: We just got word on the security footage from the airport. Cameras did pick up a late-model Malibu leaving the area. But its license plate was blacked out.
Kate Beckett: So basically we've got nothing still, right? Just a bunch of dead ends. Everywhere I look, it's just a bunch of dead ends.
Richard Castle: You know, whoever planned this escape for Lockwood knew they would need someone on the inside. If Ryker was such a straight arrow, why would they approach him?
Javier Esposito: He was a soft target because of his financial troubles.
Richard Castle: How would they know that?
Kate Beckett: They found him the same way we did. Financial records. They ran financials on everybody in that prison.
Richard Castle: Who would have that kind of authority?
Kate Beckett: A cop. Or someone who was a cop. So this third cop wasn't Lockwood's target. This third cop was the one who was holding Lockwood's leash. He's the one who's behind this whole thing. Okay, I want us to pull reports with Raglan and McCallister's name on it.
Kevin Ryan: We did all that already.
Javier Esposito: Months ago. There's nothing.
Kate Beckett: No, no, no. I'm not talking about arrest reports. I'm talking about performance evaluations...
Javier Esposito: We went through everything. We looked at every cop we could find who could have worked with them. None of them were our third guy.
Kate Beckett: Well, then check it again. And when you're done with that, check it again.
Kevin Ryan: Beckett, we want him as bad as you.
Kate Beckett: The hell you do! *Nobody* wants him as bad as I do, okay? Nobody. So check it again!


"Castle: Lucky Stiff (#3.14)" (2011)
Kate Beckett: Any idea how much money was in here?
Reginald Easley: $100,000, secured in a bank bag.
Kevin Ryan: Uh, this is Reginald Easley. He's Mr. Hixton's servant.
Reginald Easley: "Servant"? Young man, I am a traditional English butler. I apprenticed at Buckingham Palace.
Kate Beckett: Did he always keep that much hard cash in the safe?
Reginald Easley: Mr. Hixton came from an impoverished background. He found having hard currency around reassuring.
Kate Beckett: How many people knew that it was there?
Reginald Easley: Dozens, no doubt. He had a habit of buying everything in sight. No thought to how much money he was flashing around, or how dangerous it was to tell people that there was plenty more of it at home.
Richard Castle: In New York, that's like inviting someone back to your house to kill you.

Richard Castle: Hey, Ryan, what would you do if you won the lottery?
Kevin Ryan: Winery.
Richard Castle: [to Beckett] See? Everyone thinks about it.
Captain Roy Montgomery: [approaching] Everybody thinks about what?
Richard Castle: What they would do if they won the lottery.
Captain Roy Montgomery: A big-ass boat, 60-footer. Monster spinnaker hanging off the bow, two deep-sea rods hanging off the stern.
Richard Castle: Sweet.
Kate Beckett: Okay, while you guys are fantasizing about the size of your rods, I'm gonna go and interrogate our suspect.


"Castle: Smells Like Teen Spirit (#6.15)" (2014)
Kate Beckett: Is that blood, up there on the rafter?
Lanie Parish: Yes, and it's hers.
Richard Castle: How'd it get up there?
Kevin Ryan: Well, as far as we can tell, our killer threw Madison up there.
Lanie Parish: Which is probably what killed her. She has a major intracranial injury.
Richard Castle: She was thrown against the ceiling? That is a superhuman feat, bordering on physically impossible.
Kate Beckett: Okay, Castle, let's hear it. What's your outlandish theory?
Richard Castle: Isn't it obvious? Madison made the Hulk angry.

Kevin Ryan: Hey, hey. I got a hit on those bearer bonds. Turns out they were stolen months ago in an armed robbery of a bank in Floral Park. The crew cleaned out the safe deposit boxes.
Javier Esposito: Hold up. Are you saying that a seventeen year old prep school girl robbed a bank?
Kevin Ryan: No. But she might have robbed the guy who robbed the bank. According to the police report, the prime suspect in the bank robbery was one Xiangzu Chen, a former Triad enforcer who went into business for himself. Now, the DA had enough evidence to indict him, but his defense attorney got him off on a technicality, and the bonds were never recovered.
Richard Castle: And how does any of this connect with Madison?
Kevin Ryan: Look who his defense attorney is.
Kate Beckett: [looking at the report] Charles Beaumont. Madison's father?
Javier Esposito: Madison must have heard about the bonds from her dad, where Chen was hiding them, and how much they were worth.
Richard Castle: That's a huge score for a budding thief.
Kate Beckett: And if Chen found out that his lawyer's little girl stole $2.3 million from him...
Javier Esposito: It would be motive to bash her skull against the ceiling.


"Castle: Under the Gun (#3.3)" (2010)
Kevin Ryan: [canvassing a cemetery at night, guns drawn] You know, if this were a horror movie, we'd be the first ones killed, splittin' off like this.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, except we're not a couple of top-heavy co-eds out lookin' for fun. We're highly trained officers of the law with enough firepower to take out a whole horde of the undead.
Kevin Ryan: Hispanic and cocky. Yeah, you'd definitely die first.
Richard Castle: [cut to Beckett and Castle canvassing another part of the same cemetery] You know, if this were a horror movie...
Kate Beckett: Castle, focus!

Kevin Ryan: So, it looks like your shoplifter isn't our killer after all. Guard at Book Mart confirms that he caught him trying to steal a copy of "The Da Vinci Code".
Richard Castle: "The Da Vinci Code"! Maybe he thought it could help him decipher the document, thinking it's some kind of, uh, ancient religious cryptogram prophesizing the coming zombie apocalypse.
Mike Royce: Is he always like this?
Kate Beckett: No, it's usually about CIA conspiracies.
Richard Castle: I was really close on one of those.


"Castle: Eye of the Beholder (#4.5)" (2011)
Kevin Ryan: [Captain Gates has called Beckett into her office] Oh, great. What'd you do now?
Kate Beckett: Shut up.

Kate Beckett: I gotta hand it to you. This whole long con you've got going, it's impressive. Cozying up to insurance companies, telling them that you want go straight, all the while waiting for your next score.
Serena Kaye: What are you talking about?
Kate Beckett: The only catch was that you knew you needed Hayes, but you knew you couldn't get away with it if you let him live, so you insinuated yourself into my investigation to cover your tracks.
Serena Kaye: And here I thought Rick was the only writer on your team.
Kevin Ryan: [watching with Castle and Esposito] "Rick"? You guys on a first name basis now?
Javier Esposito: Well, he was making out with her in the hotel hallway.
Richard Castle: Beckett told me to stall her!
Javier Esposito: She also tell you to use tongue?


"Castle: Dead from New York (#7.22)" (2015)
Kevin Ryan: I figured out what Sid was doing in his office with those spreadsheets. He was going over his corporate bank accounts.
Kate Beckett: Sid went from paying a kidnapper at gunpoint to checking his corporate financials? That's... weird.
Kevin Ryan: That's not the only thing that's weird. Check out those expenses he highlighted.
[Ryan hands over two sheets of paper, one of which Beckett gives to Castle]
Richard Castle: Oh, these are weird. Because...?
Kevin Ryan: Because I called the bank in the Cayman Islands. All of those expenses are bogus.
Kate Beckett: So someone with access at Sid's company was embezzling money.
Kevin Ryan: Almost $4 million, the exact amount of the ransom.
Richard Castle: Wait, that's it! The embezzler was trying to replace the money he'd stolen from Sid.
Kate Beckett, Richard Castle: I know who the killer is.
Richard Castle: Nice. In fairness, though, I walked you right through that.


"Castle: One Life to Lose (#3.18)" (2011)
[listening to Castle and Beckett finish each other's sentences]
Kevin Ryan: Do you two practice this when we're not around?


"Castle: Once Upon a Time in the West (#7.7)" (2014)
Richard Castle: Okay, "diamondback". I have whittled it down to three possibilities as to what that means and why Whitney would utter it with her dying breath.
Kate Beckett: And I am sure that none of them will be a waste of my time.
Richard Castle: Possibility number one: it's the password for a murderous, underground snake handling fight club.
[seeing Beckett's skeptical look]
Richard Castle: Granted, that's probably not what it means, but it might be the basis for my next Nikki Heat novel. Possibility number two, she was killed by the Marvel character Diamondback, whose special skill was throwing diamond-shaped spikes filled with poison.
[Beckett is even more skeptical]
Richard Castle: Third possibility...
Javier Esposito: [approaching] Is a dude ranch in Arizona.
Kevin Ryan: We struck out with the Dagmars, but we found an e-mail to Whitney from a Diamondback Old West Ranch confirming a two-week stay in bunker number fourteen.
Richard Castle: [lying through his teeth] Old West dude ranch. That's my number three. That's exactly what I was gonna say. Good work, boys.
[he pats Esposito on the shoulder, but stops when he sees Espo's angry look]
Javier Esposito: You still suck.
Kevin Ryan: And you owe us for those tuxedo rentals.


"Castle: Dressed to Kill (#6.14)" (2014)
Kevin Ryan: I always thought the fashion industry seemed glamorous. Turns out mobsters are more ethical.
Kate Beckett: Oh, my gosh. Why do you think I quit? I'll take murderers over models any day.
Javier Esposito: If only murderers were this hot.


"Castle: The Final Nail (#3.15)" (2011)
Kevin Ryan: [Beckett and Castle bicker in the break room] What's going on?
Javier Esposito: Mom and dad are fighting.
Kevin Ryan: Who's winning?


"Castle: Like Father, Like Daughter (#6.7)" (2013)
Javier Esposito: Alexis, we went through the case files like you asked. I got to say, there's nothing in there that says this guy's innocent.
Alexis Castle: What about all the swabs from Kim Tolbert's body that we submitted to the New York Trace Lab for retesting? I mean, they've had them for weeks.
Kevin Ryan: Well, we've been calling every day to move things along, but it's not in our jurisdiction.
Alexis Castle: You don't understand. A man's going to die in three days unless we do something.
Kevin Ryan: No, we do understand. There's just not much that we can do.
Javier Esposito: What about your dad? Have you talked to him about this case?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Maybe he'll spot something that no one else did.


"Castle: The Time of Our Lives (#7.6)" (2014)
Kevin Ryan: [Leading two suspects away] Hey, Castle. You missed all the excitement. We were awesome. Weren't we, Javi?
Javier Esposito: [Leading Lark away] As usual.


"Castle: In the Belly of the Beast (#6.17)" (2014)
Javier Esposito: Yo, Beckett, I thought you were off.
Kate Beckett: Was that the deputy commissioner?
Javier Esposito: Yeah. There's been more brass through here than a marching band.
Kate Beckett: What's going on?
Kevin Ryan: It's all need-to-know, and... we didn't make the list.
Javier Esposito: But whatever's happening, it's going down in that conference room.


"Castle: Meme Is Murder (#7.5)" (2014)
Javier Esposito: Victim's name is Abby Smith. She's twenty-three years old. A maintenance worker found her early this morning. We're dealing with something messed up here.
Lanie Parish: You got that right. Starting off with these stab wounds.
Richard Castle: They're round. What was the murder weapon?
Lanie Parish: Hard to tell. A knitting needle, maybe, or an ice pick. Your guess is as good as mine. Her attacker knew about anatomy. He pierced her carotid and her subclavian arteries. She bled out in minutes.
Kate Beckett: Which means our killer might have had a medical background. You know, there are no signs of forced entry. Do we know how this killer came in?
Kevin Ryan: Well, we're not really sure, but he definitely wanted Abby to know that he was here.
[showing Caskett the victim's cell phone]
Kevin Ryan: She was texted this photo at 10:33, right around time of death.
Kate Beckett: The killer sent this?
Kevin Ryan: Right before he murdered her.
Richard Castle: He was watching her. And then he sent that to terrorize her. This was personal.


"Castle: Mr. & Mrs. Castle (#8.8)" (2015)
Javier Esposito: Perlmutter just called. Turns out that baggie from Lara's stomach? Pure uncut heroin.
Kevin Ryan: Uncut? No wonder she only swallowed one baggie. That 8-Ball has a street value of $30k.
Kate Beckett: Uncut heroin comes directly from the cartel, so how does a dancer from Michigan get her hands on that?


"Castle: The Dead Pool (#3.21)" (2011)
Kevin Ryan: Check out the text messages that Bridget fired off to Zack on the night he was killed.
Richard Castle: Ooh! Not a lot of "LoLs" in there.
Kate Beckett: "Zack, if you leave me, I swear to God I'll kill you."
Richard Castle: She has a way with words.
Kate Beckett: And a record to go with it.
Kevin Ryan: Disorderly conduct. Mostly minor stuff. Uniforms are bringing her in now.
Captain Roy Montgomery: It says here she's 5'2". You really think she could overpower Zack?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, no. But her brothers could. In grand Irish tradition, she has four of them. Each over six foot, each with his own claim to fame. Assault.
Richard Castle: Ooh.
Kevin Ryan: Ag assault.
Richard Castle: Bad.
Kevin Ryan: ADW.
Richard Castle: Yee.
Kevin Ryan: Battery. Assault on a city employee, parking enforcement.
Richard Castle: Doesn't count.
Captain Roy Montgomery: Easy.
Kevin Ryan: Dude.


"Castle: Dial M for Mayor (#4.12)" (2012)
Kate Beckett: Hey, Ryan, what do our victim's phone records show? Any phone calls to City Hall?
Kevin Ryan: No phone calls at all, because Laura Cambridge didn't own a cell phone. And her credit cards haven't been used in six months.
Richard Castle: No cell phone and no credit cards? It's like she's from another century.
Javier Esposito: Amish theory's looking pretty good, bro.


"Castle: The Late Shaft (#2.20)" (2010)
Kevin Ryan: Once we suspected blackmail, I ran through his financials again.
Kate Beckett: I thought they were clean.
Kevin Ryan: Well, they were. But going back, we found this.
[hands Beckett a folder]
Kate Beckett: He spent a hundred grand on a kitchen reno.
Kevin Ryan: Totally legitimate, but we searched his brownstone.
Richard Castle: And he wasn't renovating his kitchen.
Kate Beckett: So who was on the receiving end of the hundred grand?
Kevin Ryan: Zack Robinson.
Richard Castle: Ooh, good bad guy name. Snaky "z", hard "k." Even has "rob" in it.


"Castle: The Final Frontier (#5.6)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: This is like the Halloween from hell.
Javier Esposito: Oh, yeah, it's probably too low brow for you, huh? You're probably into that boring-ass intellectual kind of sci-fi, like "Gattica" or "2001". The monolith? What the hell was that?
Kevin Ryan: Don't ask me. No, no, swords and sorcery, that's more my thing. Like, uh, "Lord of the Rings".
Javier Esposito: Yeah, I could probably see you as an elf. Or a hobbit.


"Castle: Cuffed (#4.10)" (2011)
Kevin Ryan: [after rescuing Beckett and Castle] Handcuffed together that long? I'm surprised you two didn't kill each other.


"Castle: A Deadly Game (#2.24)" (2010)
Kate Beckett: Why would they try to kill someone who doesn't exist?
Richard Castle: I think I know. Come on.
[cut to the precinct]
Kevin Ryan: Hey. So, I just got back from Ballistics. That gun that we found in the victim's car...
[Castle and Beckett blow right by him; cut to Castle entering Holding]
Richard Castle: Let me guess. It's not real. It's a game.
Hans Brauer: What are you talking about?
Richard Castle: This whole thing. The fake IDs, the dossier, Luvania, the banking minister. It's all part of a game.
Hans Brauer: Hey, come on, you're breaking the fourth wall here.
Richard Castle: Listen, Hans, or whatever your name is, you see that woman?
[pointing to Beckett]
Richard Castle: She's a real cop. There's been a real murder. And you are really under arrest. If you don't start talking to us, you're gonna stay in jail. Real jail.


"Castle: Overkill (#2.23)" (2010)
Kevin Ryan: So, we're still canvassing, but I thought you'd want to hear this. Neighbor said she was on her treadmill last night listening to music.
Kate Beckett: So she didn't hear the shot.
Kevin Ryan: No, but she did open her back door to let the cat in, and she saw someone hopping over the fence on their way out of Wilder's yard.
Richard Castle: You get a description?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah.
[Ryan consults his notepad]
Kevin Ryan: Uh... a foot disappearing over the fence.


"Castle: Anatomy of a Murder (#3.5)" (2010)
Kate Beckett: Our victim's student loans. Since graduating med school, Dr. Monroe has been regularly making minimum amount payments on her $440,000 student loan.
Kevin Ryan: That's how much it costs to become a doctor? Glad I became a cop.


"Castle: A Dance with Death (#4.18)" (2012)
Kevin Ryan: [after interviewing one of the other dance contestants] Damn, did you see that?
Javier Esposito: Mm-hmm.
Kevin Ryan: She acted like I didn't even exist.
Javier Esposito: You don't. Not since you put that ring on your finger. Get used to being invisible to single women.


"Castle: Disciple (#6.9)" (2013)
[discovering Dr. Neiman knew 3XK, Caskett, Ryan, and Esposito arrive at her office to find it cleared out]
Kevin Ryan: Damn it!
Javier Esposito: Well, this explains why you couldn't reach her. She bolted.
Kevin Ryan: And if Tyson's in this, he did, too.
Richard Castle: It seems like only yesterday this place was a thriving medical practice. Ah! It was yesterday.


"Castle: Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind (#3.9)" (2010)
Kevin Ryan: Those hickeys?
Javier Esposito: Yes.
Kate Beckett: No
Richard Castle: I wish.


"Castle: 47 Seconds (#4.19)" (2012)
Richard Castle: [after talking with his mother, Castle has decided to tell Beckett how he feels about her] You got a sec?
Kate Beckett: Yeah. What's up?
Richard Castle: Um... I've been thinking, about the victims and all the opportunities they'll never have, and I don't want that to happen. I've been...
Kevin Ryan: [unintentionally interrupting the moment] Beckett. We got something.
Kate Beckett: Um...
Richard Castle: It's okay. It can wait 'till after the case.


"Castle: Ghosts (#1.8)" (2009)
Richard Castle: Someone say "murder". Hold on, I'll get my coat.
Javier Esposito: Look at him, all excited.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, like a kid at Christmas.
Kevin Ryan: With a dead body under the tree.


"Castle: Child's Play (#7.4)" (2014)
Kate Beckett: Ryan?
Kevin Ryan: Hey. CSU got us a lead. See how this cabinet door is open?
[Ryan hands Beckett a stack of evidence photos]
Kevin Ryan: Just like in these crime scene photos?
Kate Beckett: Okay. So?
Kevin Ryan: So... when the cabinet door is closed...
Kate Beckett: There's blood spatter on the door behind panel behind it.
Richard Castle: Which means the door was closed when Anton was shot.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah. Now, see this smear of blood on the inside edge of the door? CSU said that this came from a finger. So, somebody grabbed the door from the inside, pulling it open.
Richard Castle: If somebody was in there when Anton was shot...
Kate Beckett: They saw our killer.


"Castle: Get a Clue (#6.6)" (2013)
Kevin Ryan: Wade's lawyer is here. He says we need to charge his client or let him go.
Javier Esposito: We don't have enough to charge him.
Kate Beckett: Why don't we try and keep him until we do? Put Wade in with a sketch artist. Have him describe that guy that was supposedly stalking Susannah. That'll buy Castle and I enough time to tear his alibi apart. And just to cover our bases, you look into that cab that Wade described.
Kevin Ryan: Really? You want me to track down a cab off a banner ad for "Wicked".
Kate Beckett: [shrugs] Impress me.
Kevin Ryan: [to Esposito, as Beckett and Castle leave] You know, there are times I wish she'd stayed in D.C.


"Castle: Slice of Death (#3.20)" (2011)
Richard Castle: Listen, if I gave you a website, could you have your friends in Tech hack into it and take some pictures down?
Kevin Ryan: Did someone find naked pictures of you again?
Richard Castle: No. Not me, it's Alexis. It's for Alexis.
Kevin Ryan: This just got awkward. What's this about?


"Castle: Sucker Punch (#2.13)" (2010)
Javier Esposito: Meet the late Jack Coonan.
Kate Beckett: Why is that name familiar?
Kevin Ryan: 'Cause it probably crossed all our desks a dozen times in the last few years. Aggravated assault, ADW, arson.
Javier Esposito: Coonan had a heavy rep. Word is he's an enforcer for the Westies.
Lanie Parish: Okay, remind me. Who are the Westies again?
Richard Castle: Irish mafia out of Hell's Kitchen.
Kate Beckett: They deal in cargo theft, counterfeiting, extortion.
Kevin Ryan: And public urination on St. Patrick's Day.


"Castle: Hunt (#5.16)" (2013)
Javier Esposito: Paris? What's he doing in Paris?
Kate Beckett: He thinks that he can find her.
Kevin Ryan: What, so he's Liam Neeson now?
Javier Esposito: Liam Neeson? The dude's barely Ashley Judd.
Kate Beckett: Look, in the state that he's in, who knows what he's capable of, but he says that he knows someone that can help.
Javier Esposito: You gonna go after him?
Kate Beckett: And lose a day flying out there, and another one tracking him down in a place that I don't have jurisdiction or authority? No. Look, he's... he's acting like a father, and... I have to act like a cop.


"Castle: To Love and Die in L.A. (#3.22)" (2011)
Captain Roy Montgomery: You heard from Beckett?
Javier Esposito: No, sir.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, me neither.
Captain Roy Montgomery: She's not answering her cell.
Javier Esposito: Maybe she's airborne.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, that would explain her phone being turned off.
Captain Roy Montgomery: Oh. You know, I'm trying to decide who is the worse liar. Him or you.
[Esposito nods at Ryan]


"Castle: Habeas Corpse (#7.19)" (2015)
Kevin Ryan: Our John Doe was found this morning by sanitation workers. No phone, no wallet.
Kate Beckett: Cause?
Lanie Parish: Blunt force trauma to the back of the head, probably a pipe or a baseball bat. Based on lividity, I'd say it happened between 12 and 2 a.m. this morning.
Richard Castle: Any witnesses?
Javier Esposito: A guy who lives nearby heard screams around 1 a.m. He looked out his window, he saw a car speeding away.
Kate Beckett: He get a make and model?
Javier Esposito: Just taillights, but he said it looked like a sports car. Ryan and I are gonna keep looking for witnesses and street cam footage, but it's an industrial area, so coverage is spotty.
Kate Beckett: Wait a minute, I think I know this guy. He's the personal injury attorney on TV who has those late-night ads.
Lanie Parish: Oh, my god, you're right! That's, uh...
Richard Castle, Javier Esposito: The Pit Bull.
Kevin Ryan: The Pit Bull?
Richard Castle: Yeah. Richie "The Pit Bull" Falco?
[Ryan shrugs his confusion]
Richard Castle: Come on, man, you've seen the ads. A guy's head on a dog's body. "You've been in an accident? Take the law by the tail."
Lanie Parish: "And get a bite at the settlement you deserve."
Kate Beckett: "I'll make the law...
Richard Castle, Javier Esposito, Kate Beckett, Lanie Parish: ...your bitch."
[Espo says something in Spanish]
Kevin Ryan: Why am I the only one who's never seen this commercial?
Javier Esposito: Because it comes on late at night, and when you're not moonlighting, your honey-milk sipping ass is in bed by ten.


"Castle: Valkyrie (#6.1)" (2013)
Javier Esposito: So listen. We just finished a case. Come have a drink with us after work.
Richard Castle: Oh, I'd love to, but I'm working on a case of my own right now.
[covering]
Richard Castle: For my next book.
Javier Esposito: Ohh, so you just called us 'cause you need some expert technical consulting?
Richard Castle: Well, since you offered. I'm writing a scene about someone trying to investigate using only one evidence photo. A crime involving national security.
Kevin Ryan: So your hero's a spy?
Richard Castle: More like a ruggedly handsome everyman. Anyway, the photo is of a blown transformer, so I... pulled a random photo of a transformer off the Internet and there's a serial number on the side. I'm trying to determine how much my character could figure out just from that number. I was wondering if my character's police buddies might have any... resources.
Javier Esposito: Well, if your hero's fictional cop buddies are anything like your real cop buddies, then they'd have real work to get back to, so... bye bye now.
Richard Castle: What if our hero was offering Knicks floor seats?
Javier Esposito: What's that serial number?


"Castle: Veritas (#6.22)" (2014)
Kevin Ryan: What's this all about, Castle?
Richard Castle: Guys, she wouldn't want you involved.
Javier Esposito: We're already involved. We're family, bro.
Kevin Ryan: And we know this is bigger than Vulcan Simmons.
Richard Castle: How?
Kevin Ryan: We canvassed around the hotel where Jason Marks was staying. The bell captain there said he had a meeting with this man. Look familiar?
Richard Castle: [Ryan hands him a police sketch] Yeah. That's Smith.
Javier Esposito: Captain Montgomery's friend, right? The one who kept Beckett safe by holding those files on Bracken?
Kevin Ryan: Until they got blown to high heaven.
Richard Castle: Yes, but Smith is dead. He died in-hospital.
Javier Esposito: Maybe that's just how he wanted it to look.
Richard Castle: Smith did have the resources to fake his own death. And that is the only way Bracken would stop hunting him.
Kevin Ryan: Bracken? Is that was this is all about?
Richard Castle: We believe Vulcan's drug money was funding his campaign. We were trying to find a link, but maybe we got too close.
Javier Esposito: Well, how does Smith fit in?
Richard Castle: I don't know. But if he took the risk of showing himself, something big must be going on.


"Castle: Pretty Dead (#3.23)" (2011)
Javier Esposito: Yo. Bobby Stark's blazer, courtesy of the costume lady at the pageant.
Kate Beckett: And the broken black sequin?
Javier Esposito: Perfect match.
Richard Castle: Bam said the costume lady.
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] Ooh, she's not the only lady saying "bam" when it comes to Bobby Stark.
Kate Beckett: Does he have a record?
Kevin Ryan: Uh, no criminal charges, but Mr. Stark has quite the repuation.
[Ryan holds up three folders]
Kevin Ryan: Three women filed restraining orders against Bobby Stark in the last year. All for "unwanted advances".
Richard Castle: How come I didn't hear about this on TMZ?


"Castle: Montreal (#7.2)" (2014)
Javier Esposito: So, I checked with the vic's wife. The days that Mr. Williger claimed he was working late are the exact same days he was leaving work early.
Kate Beckett: That leaves about ten to twelve hours over at least a dozen days that he's unaccounted for. What was he doing?
Kevin Ryan: [approaching] I just went back through his phones and financials, and they are clean. In fact, they're too clean. From the time he left work on those days 'til the time he got home, there's no activity at all. No calls or purchases of any kind, not even subway or cab charges.
Kate Beckett: So whatever he was doing, he wanted to keep it a secret from everyone. Why?
Kevin Ryan: What we could use right now is a crazy Castle theory.


"Castle: Fool Me Once... (#2.4)" (2009)
Kevin Ryan: You know what I don't get?
Kate Beckett: Mm-hmm?
Kevin Ryan: Why go to so much trouble to create such an elaborate scam? Fletcher must have spent weeks going through all the prep work.
Kate Beckett: I can give you 50,000 reasons why.
Richard Castle: Yeah, but for con men, it's not just about the money. I mean, for them, it's about the game. The... the thrill they get from pulling a con, it's like a drug high.
Captain Roy Montgomery: [approaching] Con man was on drugs?
Kate Beckett: No, sir. Castle is just giving us psychological insight based on his extensive experience as a fraud.


"Castle: Setup (#3.16)" (2011)
DHS Agent Mark Fallon: [Giving a presentation] Thank you, Captain. Alright, folks, here's what we know. Amir Alhabi built a bomb in storage unit C412. It's a dirty bomb, designed to explode and disburse a highly radioactive Cobalt 60. That bomb is missing...
Kevin Ryan: Called Jenny to tell her I'd be late. Tried to get her to go visit her mom.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, I did the same thing with Lanie. Didn't work. She hates her mom.


"Castle: The Way of the Ninja (#6.18)" (2014)
Javier Esposito: [leaving a Japanese gentlemen's club] It cost you 6K and we got nothing to show for it.
Richard Castle: I wouldn't say that.
Kevin Ryan: You mean besides lipstick marks on your shirt.
Richard Castle: I actually got a lead in there that's gonna blow this case wide... oh, oh, wait. Lipstick marks? On my shirt? Where? Beckett'll kill me. OH MY GOD! I didn't call! You guys, Beckett *is* going to kill me.
[Castle pulls his phone out of his pocket; before he can dial, a throwing star sticks into the screen]
Richard Castle: Ninja attack.


"Castle: Law & Murder (#3.19)" (2011)
Kevin Ryan: "Cowards die many times before their death. The valiant never taste of death but once."
Javier Esposito: Bro, you're not Castle.
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, I know I'm not Castle.
Javier Esposito: Then stop trying to talk like him.
Kevin Ryan: What, I'm not allowed to reference the Bard? I'm a renaissance man.
Javier Esposito: Memorizing one quote does not make you a renaissance man.
Kevin Ryan: What if I memorize two?
Javier Esposito: Have you? Memorized two?
Kevin Ryan: No. But what if I did?
Javier Esposito: Depends on the quote.


"Castle: Limelight (#6.13)" (2014)
Kate Beckett: [approaching Lanie and the body] OD?
Lanie Parish: Given her lifestyle, you'd think, but this is plain old-fashioned murder. Blunt force trauma to the back of the head. The facial lacerations probably happened with the fall.
Kate Beckett: Okay, when did this happen?
Lanie Parish: Lividity puts it between nine and eleven last night.
Javier Esposito: Well, we can cut that time frame in half. Doorman said that the limo driver dropped her off at the lobby last night at ten p.m.
Kate Beckett: She was killed within an hour of returning home?
Richard Castle: What was she doing back here?
Javier Esposito: Doorman didn't know, but he said that she uses that door sometimes when she wants to avoid the crowd.
Richard Castle: So... maybe she was sneaking out or meeting someone?
Kevin Ryan: If so, it was probably someone she knew. Gates are locked on both sides, and you need an access code to get in.
Kate Beckett: Is there any security cam footage we can pull?
Kevin Ryan: Not back here.
Richard Castle: Ironic, seeing as how she spent her entire life in front of cameras.


"Castle: A Chill Goes Through Her Veins (#1.5)" (2009)
Richard Castle: There's got to be an explanation. A story that makes everything make sense.
Kate Beckett: Okay, Castle. What's our Jane Doe's story?
Richard Castle: Well, I don't know how it starts, but I know how it ends. Frozen at a construction site. So, flying monkeys aside, what's the first question? How did she get there?
Kevin Ryan: Considering she was frozen solid, she had to have been kept pretty close.
Richard Castle: Not necessarily.
[pointing to a map on the board]
Richard Castle: Here is the site. Her body might not have been kept as close as you might think. It takes a long time for a frozen body to thaw.
Kevin Ryan: What, you, uh, freeze a body once for one of your books?
Richard Castle: No. But I cooked a turkey for Thanksgiving. It was a twenty-eight pounder. It took all night to unfreeze.
Kate Beckett: She's a person, Castle. Not a turkey.
Richard Castle: Just making a point.