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Quotes for
Claude Erskine-Brown (Character)
from "Rumpole of the Bailey" (1978)

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"Rumpole of the Bailey: Rumpole and the Official Secret (#4.3)" (1987)
[a few days earlier, Claude Erskine-Brown had asked Rumpole to give him an alibi by pretending that they had been to the opera together when in fact Erskine-Brown was planning to go with Liz Probert but did not want his wife to find out. Now he bursts in to Rumpole's office, looking very worried, and wants Rumpole to change his story]
Claude Erskine-Brown: Rumpole...
Horace Rumpole: Good Lord! You look as if the Valkyries have been after you all night.
Claude Erskine-Brown: Well I have tell you, we *didn't* go to the opera together.
Horace Rumpole: Oh, what a pity. I was quite looking forward to not being there!

[Phyllida Erskine-Brown has stopped talking to Claude because she has found out that he took Liz Probert to the opera]
Claude Erskine-Brown: [plaintively] Horace, do you imagine Philly will ever speak to me again?
Horace Rumpole: [reassuringly] Of course she will, Claude. Yes.
Horace Rumpole: [to himself] If only to say goodbye.


"Rumpole of the Bailey: Rumpole and the Bubble Reputation (#5.1)" (1988)
Horace Rumpole: [entering Pomeroy's and seeing a pensive Erskine-Brown] Oh, what can ail thee, Erskine-Brown, alone and palely loitering?
Claude Erskine-Brown: [depressed] Mmm. It's my practice, Rumpole.
Horace Rumpole: [clearly enjoying the pun] Oh, still practicing? I thought you might have got the hang of it by now.

[Claude Erskine-Brown and Ted Sleaman meet for the first time in years]
Claude Erskine-Brown: "Slimey" Sleaman?
Ted Sleaman: "Collywobbles" Erskine-Brown.
Claude Erskine-Brown: We were at school together.
Horace Rumpole: [drily] Yes, obviously.
Ted Sleaman: Look, would you care to join my editor. Glass of Bolly.
Claude Erskine-Brown: What?
Ted Sleaman: Bollinger.
Claude Erskine-Brown: Thank you Slimey, I'd love to.
Ted Sleaman: Well come on, then.
Claude Erskine-Brown: [to Erskine-Brown] Golly, Colly. Bolly.


"Rumpole of the Bailey: Rumpole's Last Case (#4.6)" (1987)
Phyllida 'Portia' Erskine-Brown: [to Cyril, her client] Oh, you know Rumpole's advising Dennis. Don't let us cut each other's throats, old darling. Honor among thieves. All that sort of nonsense.
Cyril Timson: What are you sayin'?
Phyllida 'Portia' Erskine-Brown: Well, you are a thief, Mr. Timson!
Cyril Timson: That is very true.
Phyllida 'Portia' Erskine-Brown: But you aren't a gunman!
Cyril Timson: On my baby's head I'm not!
Claude Erskine-Brown: How old's your baby?
Cyril Timson: Thirty-one - in window cleanin'.


"Rumpole of the Bailey: Rumpole and the Barrow Boy (#5.2)" (1988)
Samuel 'Soapy Sam' Ballard, Q.C.: His marriage is on the rocks, Rumpole, and when a fellow's marriage is on the rocks, he can't always be trusted with a cheque.
Claude Erskine-Brown: Indeed.
Horace Rumpole: Oh, really? How's your marriage, Ballard?
Samuel 'Soapy Sam' Ballard, Q.C.: Well, you know perfectly well, Rumpole, I'm a bachelor.
Horace Rumpole: Then aren't you in the position of a lifelong vegetarian giving us your recipe for steak and kidney pie?


"Rumpole of the Bailey: Rumpole and the Tap End (#5.4)" (1988)
Samuel 'Soapy Sam' Ballard Q.C.: I told him Guthrie was a perfectly charming chap, of course.
Claude Erskine-Brown: Oh, perfectly charming, no doubt about that!
Samuel 'Soapy Sam' Ballard Q.C.: But as a judge, perhaps he lacks judgement.
Claude Erskine-Brown: Yes, which is a pretty important quality in a judge.