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: Thanks for letting me come. Andy Barker
: You were hiding in the back seat of my car. Simon
: I'm just saying I appreciate it.
: Hey, this address is right near a girl I used to date.
: Yeah, I can't go within 500 feet of that place.
: What is it, take your daughter to work day? Simon
: It is an honor to be ribbed by you, sir. Lew Staziak
: I'm not ribbin, I just honestly want to know why you're dressed up in men's clothes.
: Why did we even go to Lew? Half of what he says is crazy. Simon
: Unless it's not... Andy Barker
: Please... a murderous chicken cartel? That doesn't exist. Simon
: Unless it does... Andy Barker
: Stop doing that!
: Thanks for the coffee. Simon
: Oh, you're welcome, Lew. Lew Staziak
: [grunts after taking a sip
] Guess you didn't need to bring sugar, you got plenty in your shoes.
] Lew, are you insane? Lew Staziak
: Well, if they're coming tonight, let's be ready for 'em. Wally
: I'll be there for you, Andy. The enemy of my friend is my enemy, my friend. Simon
: Oh-hohoho a reverse stakeout! We'll probably be here all night.
: I don't want any cracks about my retainer.
: What in hell is that? Simon
: It's a stakeout, I got coffee. Lew Staziak
[takes a cup
] Lew Staziak
: I'm growing a set of jugs just looking at this thing.
: Well why do we have to lie about who we are? Simon
: We need a backstory. Nobody's gonna tell an accountant and a video store manager where she is. Loretta's Roomate
: [opens door
] Yeah? Andy Barker
: Hi, eh, we're looking for Loretta Crispin. We were hoping that - Loretta's Roomate
: She went to a bar downtown, the Brunswick House. Andy Barker
: Oh. Well that's all we want, thanks very much. Simon
: Hi. We're movie producers. We think she would be perfect on our upcoming film. Loretta's Roomate
: It's on Figaro or Western Hugh. Andy Barker
: Yeah, I know that intersection, thank you. Simon
: Well, it's an underwater action drama about a mutated lion that lives in the ocean and attacks shipping lanes. It's called Sea-Cat! Loretta's Roomate
: She's wearing a grey silk top, grey skirt, black pearl necklace and matching earings. Andy Barker
: Sounds like she'll be easy to find, thank you very much. Simon
] I'll bet General Jackson could jog your memory...
: [quoting from the movie 'Death Blimp'
] Somebody call the park ranger, they're gonna slam together.
[imitates a girly scream
Miss Congeniality 2 doll
: [Sandra Bullock's voice from Miss Congeniality
] You think I'm gorgeous, you wanna kiss me. Andy Barker
: No, seriously, what is that? Simon
: It's a remote controlled Sandra Bullock doll from Miss Congeniality 2. Andy Barker
: Oh, score! Man, I didn't think they could top Miss Congeniality, but they came pretty darn close. Simon
: It's counterfeit. I made it to mock the movie.
: I just don't know where to start. Simon
: You just need to bring...
[raises right fist
: ...the thunder
[raises left fist
: '... and the lightning. Andy Barker
: You got walnut in your teeth. Simon
: Oh crap.
: You read lips? Nicole
: Fluently. Andy Barker
: Why do you know how to do that? Nicole
: I have a deaf brother. Simon
: I like Stevie Wonder.
: [Lew and Andy are off on another case
] Alright it's go time! I'll get in back. Lew Staziak
: Actually it's stay time.
] You win this round, Lew Staziac, but when vengeance strikes, it will be swift -
[is hit in the head by humus from a humus gun
: Andy, it's time to get Snowball. Andy Barker
: We're gonna bag us an elephant.