Zelda Gilroy
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Quotes for
Zelda Gilroy (Character)
from "The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis" (1959)

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"The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis: Everything But the Truth (#2.33)" (1961)
Dobie Gillis: Ah Zelda you are lovely
Zelda Gilroy: You're a dream
Dobie Gillis: You are poetry.
Zelda Gilroy: You're divine
Dobie Gillis: When I get you alone I'm going to strangle you.


"The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis: Zelda, Get Off My Back (#2.17)" (1961)
Dobie Gillis: [Studying history] And now, the six wives of Henry VIII...
Maynard G. Krebs: Hey, ain't he the cat who looks like Captain Bligh?
Zelda Gilroy: Maynard, clam up!
Maynard G. Krebs: Yeah! And Captain Bligh - he looks like Charles Laughton! Hey, Zelda, you're 100% brain - you know everything - so how come all the history characters look like Charles Laughton?
Zelda Gilroy: Maynard!
Maynard G. Krebs: Abraham Lincoln is the spitting image of Raymond Massey. And Bela Lugosi - he's a dead ringer for Dracula.
Dobie Gillis: Maynard, come on now!
Maynard G. Krebs: And Charlton Heston - he looks like practically everybody!
Zelda Gilroy: [Shaking her fist] Maynard, I'll clobber you!
Maynard G. Krebs: And Fulton Ziggafoos!
[Maynard lays down on the table and puts his hat over his face]
Dobie Gillis: [Puzzled] Fulton Ziggafoos?
Maynard G. Krebs: Yeah, he looks like my Aunt Harriet.
Zelda Gilroy: [Exasperated] Dobie, we must press on, despite this dragging anchor.
Maynard G. Krebs: Like you're welcome.


"The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis: The Fast White Mouse (#3.4)" (1961)
Zelda Gilroy: [Addressing Dobie] I love you in a classroom, I love you anywhere. I love you indoors, outdoors, upstairs, downstairs, backwards, forwards, I love ya!
Maynard G. Krebs: How come?
Zelda Gilroy: How come what?
Maynard G. Krebs: How come you love him? He don't love you.
Zelda Gilroy: He will. I'll get him yet.
Maynard G. Krebs: So what do you have when you have him? I mean, he's kind of puny, he ain't too bright, and he'll be bald before he's thirty.
Dobie Gillis: Thanks a lot.
Maynard G. Krebs: Like you're welcome.
Zelda Gilroy: Don't you understand, Maynard? That's exactly why I love him. He's weak and bewildered and helpless. He needs me to guide his faltering feet.
Dobie Gillis: Zelda, please, won't you get off my back?
Zelda Gilroy: Never, poopsie.


"The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis: Baby Talk (#2.3)" (1960)
Zelda Gilroy: Dobie, get that baby out of here. You've got to.
Maynard G. Krebs: Good thinking.
Zelda Gilroy: Maybe, we could sneak her out the window.
Maynard G. Krebs: Good thinking.
Dobie Gillis: And then we could take it over to Maynard's house.
Maynard G. Krebs: Bad thinking.
Dobie Gillis: Why not?
Maynard G. Krebs: I don't exactly understand it, Dobe, but ever since I was born, my father ain't too crazy about babies.


"The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis: The Chicken from Outer Space (#1.23)" (1960)
Zelda Gilroy: Thank you, Mother Gillis. Together, you and I will salvage that bum.
Winifred Gillis: I gotta kill that girl; I just gotta.


"The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis: Love Is a Science (#1.3)" (1959)
Dobie Gillis: [Dobie bemoans his situation, suffering through science class, turns to his table mate] And as for you, you don't make things any easier, you know? A whole month I've been sitting here next to you and I haven't heard one word out of you, not one single word, not even "hello." You just sit there doing everything right and giving me a big freeze. For Pete's sake, speak to me. Say something! Say anything!
Zelda Gilroy: I love you.
Dobie Gillis: [Stunned] I beg your pardon?
Zelda Gilroy: That's right. I love you.
Dobie Gillis: Zelda, I am, of course, flattered...
Zelda Gilroy: Now, don't get a swelled head. You're nothing so special. You're dumb as a post, you're pigeon-toed and you'll be bald before you're 30.
Dobie Gillis: Is that so? Well, I don't want to be unkind, but you're not exactly a traffic-stopper yourself.
Zelda Gilroy: Yeah, we're a couple of dogs all right. But still, we're not too repulsive. Anyway, what's the difference? We're victims of propinquity.
Dobie Gillis: What's that?
Zelda Gilroy: Propinquity: nearness, closeness. Sigafoos and Wembling of Harvard, in a study of 2,900 married couples, proved that in 87% of the cases the couples first fell in love because of propinquity. You put a boy and a girl close to each other for long enough and it's bound to happen. It's a scientific fact.
Dobie Gillis: No offense, Zelda, but I don't love you.
Zelda Gilroy: You will. You're Gillis and I'm Gilroy. Don't forget they seat students alphabetically in science classes. You'll be sitting next to me all year long, and next year, too. And then when we go on to to medical school: eight more years of propinquity. Don't fight it, Dobie. You can't beat science.
Dobie Gillis: I can try, Zelda. I can try.
Zelda Gilroy: Fool.
[goes back to lab work]