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Quotes for
Castiel (Character)
from "Supernatural" (2005)

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"Supernatural: Hell House (#1.17)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: Truce?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, truce. Just for the next 100 miles.

Sam Winchester: I have a confession to make, I was the on that called them and told them I was a Hollywood producer.
Dean Winchester: Well I was the one that put the dead fish in their back seat.
Sam Winchester: [both laugh] Truce?
Dean Winchester: Ok well at least for the next 100 miles.

Sam Winchester: [Dean puts a spoon in Sam's mouth when he's sleeping] Haha. Very funny.
Dean Winchester: [laughs] Sorry. Not a lot of scenery here in East Texas, kinda got to make your own.

Dean Winchester: I thought the legend said that Morteki only goes after chicks.
Sam Winchester: He does.
Dean Winchester: Right well that explains we he went after you but why me?
Sam Winchester: Hilarious.

Sam Winchester: Man, we're not kids anymore, Dean! We're not gonna start that crap up again.
Dean Winchester: Start what up?
Sam Winchester: That... prank stuff. It's stupid, and it always escalates!
Dean Winchester: Oh what's the matter Sammy, afraid you're gonna get a little Nair in your shampoo again, huh?
Sam Winchester: All right. Just remember you started it.
Dean Winchester: Oh ho, bring it on baldy.

Dean Winchester: [picking up a jar in the Hell House's basement] Hey Sam I dare you to take a swig 'a this.
Sam Winchester: The hell would I do that for?
Dean Winchester: [grinning] I double dare you.

Dean Winchester: [Sam laughs] You didn't.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] Oh I did!

Dean Winchester: [hand glued to beer bottle] You didn't.
Sam Winchester: Oh, I so did.

Dean Winchester: People believe in Santa Claus. How come I'm not getting hooked up every Christmas?
Sam Winchester: Because you're a bad person.

[Dean pulls the string on a novelty toy, making it cackle]
Sam Winchester: If you pull that string one more time, I'm gonna kill you.
[Dean pulls it again, laughs; Sam glares]
Dean Winchester: C'mon man, you need more laughter in your life, you know, you're way too tense.

Dean Winchester: I barely have any skin left on my palm.
Sam Winchester: I'm not touching that line with a ten foot pole.

Sam Winchester: Kinda makes you wonder. Of all the things we've hunted, how many existed just because people believed in them?

[after Dean puts itching powder in Sam's shorts]
Sam Winchester: Man, I think I'm allergic to our soap or somethin'.
[Dean laughs and starts to walk away]
Sam Winchester: You did this?
[Dean laughs again]
Sam Winchester: You're a friggin' jerk!
Dean Winchester: Oh yeah!
[Sam takes his bag and coffee and leaves]

[Dean taps his beer bottle against Sam's and takes a drink; Sam smirks. Dean tries to put the bottle down and finds that it's glued to his hand. Sam laughs]
Dean Winchester: You didn't.
[Sam holds up a bottle of superglue, grinning]
Sam Winchester: Oh, I did.

Sam Winchester: I have a confession to make.
Dean Winchester: What's that?
Sam Winchester: [about Ed and Harry] I was the one who called them and told 'em I was a producer.
Dean Winchester: Well, I'm the one who put the dead fish in their backseat.

[Dean and Sam find the Hell House guarded by police]
Sam Winchester: I guess the cops don't want any more kids screwin' around in there.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, but *we* still gotta get in there.
[they hear loud whispering]
Dean Winchester: I don't believe it.
[Sam looks and sees Zeddmore and Spengler trying to sneak up on the house]
Dean Winchester: I got an idea.
[he throws his voice]
Dean Winchester: Who ya gonna call?
[the cops chase the other two; Sam and Dean sneak into the house]

Sam Winchester: Man, we're not kids anymore, Dean. We're not gonna start that crap up again.
Dean Winchester: Start what up?
Sam Winchester: That prank stuff. It's stupid, and it always escalates.
Dean Winchester: Aw, what's the matter Sammy, afraid you're get a little Nair in your shampoo again, huh?

Dean Winchester: I thought the legend says that Mordechai only goes after chicks.
Sam Winchester: It does.
Dean Winchester: Right. Well, I mean, that explains why he went after you, but why me?

Dean Winchester: Okay, wait a second. You're trying to tell me that just because people believe in Mordechai, he's real?
Sam Winchester: I don't know, maybe.
Dean Winchester: People believe in Santa Clause, how come I'm not getting hooked up every Christmas?
Sam Winchester: Because you're a bad person.

Dean Winchester: I barely have enough skin left on my palm.
Sam Winchester: I'm not touching that line with a ten foot pole.

[Dean and Sam ask the kids about the haunted house]
Second Teenage Boy: It was the scariest thing I ever saw in my life, I swear to God!
Third Teenage Boy: From the moment we walked in. The walls were painted black.
Second Teenage Boy: Red.
First Teenage Girl: I think it was blood!
Second Teenage Boy: With all these freaky symbols.
Third Teenage Boy: Crosses and stars and...
Second Teenage Boy: Pentagons...
Third Teenage Boy: Pentacostals!
First Teenage Girl: Whatever. I had my eyes closed the whole time.
Second Teenage Boy: But I can damn sure tell you this much, no matter what anybody else says.
First Teenage Girl: That poor girl.
Third Teenage Boy: With the black...
Second Teenage Boy: Blonde...
First Teenage Girl: Red hair, just, just, just hanging there!
Second Teenage Boy: Kicking!
Third Teenage Boy: Without even moving!
First Teenage Girl: She was real!
Second Teenage Boy: One hundred percent!
Third Teenage Boy: And kinda hot. Well you know, in a *dead* sort of way.
Dean Winchester: Okay...
Sam Winchester: ...And how did you find out about this place anyway?
Second Teenage Boy, Third Teenage Boy, First Teenage Girl: Craig!

Sam Winchester: We're doing an article on local hauntings, and rumor has it you might know about one.
Craig Thursten: You mean the Hell House?
Dean Winchester: That's the one.
Craig Thursten: I didn't think there was anything to the story.
Sam Winchester: Why don't you tell us the story?
Craig Thursten: Well, supposedly back in the thirties, this farmer, Mordecai Murdoch, used to live in the house with his six daughters. It was during the Depression, his crops were failing, he didn't have enough money to even feed his own family. So I guess that's when he went off the deep end.
Sam Winchester: How?
Craig Thursten: Well, he figured, it was best if his girls died quick, rather than starve to death. So he attacked them. And they screamed, and begged for him to stop, but, he just strung 'em up. One after another. And then when he was all finished, he turned around and hung himself. Now they say that his spirit is trapped in the house forever. Stringing up any other girl that goes inside.
Dean Winchester: And where'd you hear all this?
Craig Thursten: My cousin Dana told me. I don't know where she heard it from. You gotta realize, I didn't believe this for a second...
Sam Winchester: But now you do.
Craig Thursten: I don't know what the hell to think, man. Guys, I'll tell you exactly what I told the police, okay? That girl was real. And she was dead. This was not a prank. I swear to God, I don't wanna go anywhere near that house, ever again, okay?

Sam Winchester: Well, I couldn't find a Mordecai, but I did turn up a Mark Murdoch who lived in that house in the thirties. He did have children, but only two of 'em. Both boys. And there's no record he ever killed anyone.
Dean Winchester: Huh.
Sam Winchester: What about you?
Dean Winchester: Ah well, those kids didn't really give us a clear description of that dead girl, but I did hit up the police station. No matching missing persons, it's like she never existed. Dude, come on man, we did our diggin'. This one's a bust. All right? For all we know those Hellhound boys made up the whole thing.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, all right.
Dean Winchester: I say we find ourselves a bar and some beers and leave the legend to the locals.
[he gets in the car; Sam waits, grinning; Dean turns the ignition and music blasts out of the speakers at full volume]
Dean Winchester: Whoa! Jeez, what the...
[Sam laughs, getting in]
Dean Winchester: That's all you got? That's weak. That is bush-league!

Dean Winchester: Look, if Mordecai can't leave the house and we can't kill him? We improvise.
[he flicks a lighter, tosses it through the door onto the lighter fluid he had spread around; they run as the house goes up in flames]
Sam Winchester: That's your solution? Burn the whole damn place to the ground?
Dean Winchester: Well no one'll go in anymore. I mean look, Mordecai can't haunt a house if there's no house to haunt. It's fast and dirty but it works.
Sam Winchester: Well what if the legend changes again and Mordecai is allowed to leave the house?
Dean Winchester: Well then we just have to come back.

"Supernatural: Shadow (#1.16)" (2006)
Dean Winchester: I talked to the bartender.
Sam Winchester: You get anything? Besides her number?
Dean Winchester: Dude. I'm a professional. I'm offended that you would think that.
[pause, Sam gives Dean a look]
Dean Winchester: All right, yeah.
[he holds up a napkin with the number]
Sam Winchester: You mind doin' a little bit of thinkin' with your upstairs brain, Dean?

Dean Winchester: [about Meg] Who the hell was she?
Sam Winchester: I don't really know. I only met her once. Meetin' up with her again... I dunno man, it's weird.
Dean Winchester: And what was she sayin'? Huh, I treat you like luggage? What were you, bitchin' about me to some chick?
Sam Winchester: Look I'm sorry Dean, it was when we had that huge fight, when I was at that bus stop in Indiana. But that's not important, just listen...
Dean Winchester: [interrupting, upset] Well is there any truth to what she's sayin', I mean am I keepin' you against your will, Sam?
Sam Winchester: No, of course not, now would you *listen*?
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: I think there's something strange going on here, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, tell me about it. She wasn't even that into me.
Sam Winchester: No, man, I mean like *our* kind of strange.

Dean Winchester: [On the phone] Now why don't you give that girl a private stripper-gram.
Sam Winchester: Bite me.
Dean Winchester: Bite her! Don't leave teeth marks though, just enough to...
[Sam disconnects phone]
Dean Winchester: Sam? Ye...
[hangs up]

Sam Winchester: [about Meg] Look, I could be wrong; I'm just sayin', that there's something about this girl that I can't quite put my finger on.
Dean Winchester: But I bet you'd like to. Maybe she's not a suspect, maybe you got a thing for her, huh? Maybe you're thinkin' a little too much with your upstairs brain, huh?

Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester: Dude, I gotta talk to you.

Sam Winchester: What if this whole thing was over tonight? Man, I'd sleep for a month. Go back to school, just... be a *person* again.
Dean Winchester: [surprised] You wanna go back to school?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. Once we're done huntin' the thing.
Dean Winchester: Huh.
Sam Winchester: Why, is there somethin' wrong with that?
Dean Winchester: [unenthusiastic] No, no it's uh, it's great, good for you.

Sam Winchester: [on cell] Hey.
Dean Winchester: Let me guess, you're lurking outside that poor girl's apartment, aren't you?
Sam Winchester: No.
Sam Winchester: Yes...
Dean Winchester: You got a funny way of showing your affection.

Sam Winchester: I mean, what are you gonna do when it's all over?
Dean Winchester: It's never gonna *be* over. There's gonna be others. There's always gonna be somethin' to hunt.
Sam Winchester: But there's gotta be somethin' that you want for yourself...
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I don't want you to leave the second this thing's over, Sam.
[turns his back to Sam]
Sam Winchester: Dude, what's your problem?
[pause; Dean turns back to Sam]
Dean Winchester: Why do you think I drag you everywhere? Huh? I mean, why do you think I came and got you at Stanford in the first place?
Sam Winchester: 'Cause Dad was in trouble. 'Cause you wanted to find the thing that killed Mom.
Dean Winchester: Yes, that, but it's more than that, man. You and me and Dad, I mean, I want us to... I want us to be together again. I want us to be a family again.
Sam Winchester: [gently] Dean, we *are* a family. I'd do anything for you. But things will never be the way they were before.
[Dean looks heartbroken]
Dean Winchester: Could be.
Sam Winchester: I don't want them to be. I'm not gonna live this life forever. Dean, when this is all over, you're gonna have to let me go my own way.
[they share a look]

Dean Winchester: You trapped us. Good for you. It's Miller time. Why don't you kill us already?
Meg: Not very quick on the uptake, are we? This trap isn't for you.
Sam Winchester: Dad. It's a trap for Dad.
Dean Winchester: Oh, sweetheart. You're dumber 'n you look. 'Cause even if Dad was in town, which he is not, he wouldn't walk into somethin' like this, he's too good.

Sam Winchester: Why're you doin' this Meg? What kinda deal you got worked out here, huh? And with who?
Meg: I'm doing this for the same reasons you do what you do. Loyalty. Love. Like the love you had for mommy, and Jess.
Sam Winchester: Go to hell.
Meg: Baby I'm already there.

Meg: Oh and I met what's his name, something Michael Murray at a bar.
Sam Winchester: [after a beat] Who?
Meg: It doesn't matter.

[Dean and Sam are dressed as alarm company technicians]
Dean Winchester: You know I gotta say, Dad and me did just fine without these *stupid* costumes. I feel like a high school drama dork. What was that play that you did, that, what was it, uh, Our Town. Yeah, you were good. It was cute.
Sam Winchester: Look, you wanna pull this off or not?
Dean Winchester: I'm just sayin' these outfits cost hard-earned money, okay?
Sam Winchester: Whose?
Dean Winchester: Ours! You think credit card fraud's easy?

Dean Winchester: [about the murdered girl] Meredith's heart was missing.
Sam Winchester: Her heart?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, her heart.
Sam Winchester: So what do you think did it to her?
Dean Winchester: The landlady said it looked like an animal attack. Maybe it was. Werewolf?
Sam Winchester: No, not a werewolf, the lunar cycle's not right. Plus if it was a creature, it would've left some kind of trace. It's probably a spirit.
[Dean notices the pattern of blood on the floor]
Dean Winchester: See if you can find any masking tape around.
[Dean uses the masking tape to connect the blood spatters]
Sam Winchester: Ever see that symbol before?
Dean Winchester: Never.
Sam Winchester: Me neither.

Sam Winchester: [on cell] What about the symbol, any luck?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, that I did have some luck with, it's uh, turns out it's Zoroastrian. Very very old-school, like two thousand years before Christ. It's a sigil for a Deva.
Sam Winchester: What's a Deva?
Dean Winchester: Translates to demon of darkness. Zoroastrian demons, and they're savage, they're animalistic, you know, nasty attitudes, kinda like uh, demonic pit bulls.
Sam Winchester: How'd you figure that out?
Dean Winchester: Gimme some credit man. You don't have the corner on paper chasin' around here.
Sam Winchester: Oh yeah? Name the last book you read.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I called Dad's friend Caleb, he told me, all right?

Dean Winchester: Anyway here's the thing, these Devas, they need to be summoned. Conjured.
Sam Winchester: So someone's controlling it.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, that's what I'm sayin'. And uh, from what I gather it's pretty risky business too, I mean these uh, these suckers tend to bite the hand that feeds 'em. And the uh, the arms, and the torsos...
Sam Winchester: So what do they look like?
Dean Winchester: Well nobody knows, I mean nobody's seen 'em for a couple of millenia. And summoning a demon that ancient? Someone really knows their stuff. Think we got a major player in town.

Dean Winchester: So hot little Meg is summoning the Deva.
Sam Winchester: Looks like she was usin' that black altar to control the thing.
Dean Winchester: So Sammy's got a thing for the bad girl.
[he laughs, Sam rolls his eyes]
Dean Winchester: Now what's the deal with that bowl again?
Sam Winchester: She was talking into it, the way witches used to scry into crystal balls or animal entrails, she was communicating with someone.
Dean Winchester: With who, with the Deva?
Sam Winchester: No, you said those things were savages. No, this was someone different. Someone who's givin' her orders. Someone, who's comin' to that warehouse.
[pause, Dean goes and looks in a folder]
Dean Winchester: Holy crap.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: What I was gonna tell you earlier. I uh, I pulled a favor with my uh, friend, Amy, over at the police department? The complete records of the two victims. We missed somethin' the first time.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: The uh, first victim, the old man? Spent his whole life in Chicago but he wasn't born here, look where he was born.
Sam Winchester: [reading] Lawrence Kansas.
Dean Winchester: [changing folders] Mm-hm. Meredith, second victim? Turns out she was adopted. Guess where she's from?
[Sam reads the file; it says Lawrence Kansas]
Sam Winchester: Holy crap.

[Dean and Sam are tied up]
Sam Winchester: [to Meg] This, the whole thing was a trap. Running into you at the bar, following you here, hearing what you had to say. It was all a set-up, wasn't it?
[Meg grins]
Sam Winchester: And that the victims were from Lawrence?
Meg: Doesn't mean anything. It was just to draw you in, that's all.
Sam Winchester: You killed those two people for nothing.
Meg: Baby I've killed a lot more for a lot less.

Dean Winchester: Dad it was a trap. I didn't know, I'm sorry.
John Winchester: It's all right. I thought it might've been.
Dean Winchester: Were you there?
John Winchester: Yeah, I got there just in time to see the girl take the swan-dive. She *was* the bad guy, right?
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Yes sir.
John Winchester: Good. Well, doesn't surprise me. It's tried to stop me before.
Sam Winchester: The demon has?
John Winchester: It knows I'm close. It knows I'm gonna kill it. Not just exorcise it or send it back to hell. Actually kill it.
Dean Winchester: How?
John Winchester: I'm workin' on that.

[the Devas attack; Sam rummages through their weapons]
Sam Winchester: Shut your eyes! These things are shadow demons, so let's light 'em up!
[he lights a white phosphorus grenade; the Devas vanish]

Sam Winchester: All right come on. We don't have much time. Soon as the flame's out, they'll be back.
Dean Winchester: Sam wait, wait! Sam, wait. Dad, you can't come with us.
Sam Winchester: What? What're you talkin' about?
John Winchester: You boys, you're beat to hell.
Dean Winchester: We'll be all right.
Sam Winchester: Dean! We should stick together! We'll go after this demon t...
Dean Winchester: Sam, listen to me! We almost got Dad killed in there. Don't you understand, they're not gonna stop. They're gonna try again, they're gonna use us to get to him! I mean Meg was right! Dad's vulnerable when he's with us. He... he's stronger without us around.
Sam Winchester: [to John] Dad. No. After everything. After all the time we spent lookin' for you, please. I gotta be a part of this fight.
John Winchester: This fight is just starting. And we are all gonna have a part to play. For now you gotta trust me, son. Okay? You gotta let me go.
[pause; Sam reluctantly nods]
John Winchester: Be careful, boys.

"Supernatural: Faith (#1.12)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: What the hell are you doin' here?
Dean Winchester: Checked myself out.
Sam Winchester: Are you crazy?
Dean Winchester: Well, I'm not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren't even hot.

Dean Winchester: You ever actually watch daytime TV? It's terrible.
Sam Winchester: I talked to your doctor...
Dean Winchester: That fabric softener teddy bear... oooh, I'm 'a hunt that little bitch down.

Dean Winchester: I know it's not easy but I'm gonna die and you can't stop it.
Sam Winchester: Watch me.

Sam Winchester: You know this whole' I laugh in the face of death' thing? It's crap. I can see right through it.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, whatever dude.

Dean Winchester: You're not gonna let me die in peace, are you?
Sam Winchester: I'm not gonna let you die. Period.

Dean Winchester: Man, you're a lying bastard! Thought you said we were going to see a doctor.
Sam Winchester: I believe I said a specialist. Look Dean, this guy's supposed to be the real deal.
Dean Winchester: I can't believe you brought me here to see some guy who heals people out of a tent!

Sam Winchester: But if there was something there Dean, I would have seen it too. I mean, I've been seeing an awful lot lately.
Dean Winchester: Oh, excuse me, psychic wonder!

Sam Winchester: But you said you saw a dude in a suit.
Dean Winchester: Oh, what? You thought he should have been working the whole black robe thing?

Dean Winchester: All right, well, looks like you're gonna leave town without me.
Sam Winchester: What are you talkin' about, I'm not gonna leave you here.
Dean Winchester: Hey. You better take care of that car. Or I swear I'll haunt your ass.
Sam Winchester: I don't think that's funny.
Dean Winchester: Ah c'mon, it's a little funny.
Dean Winchester: Look Sammy, what can I say man, it's a dangerous gig. I drew the short straw. That's it, end of story.
Sam Winchester: Don't talk like that, all right? We still have options.
Dean Winchester: What options? You got burial or cremation. I know it's not easy, but I'm gonna die. And you can't stop it.
Sam Winchester: Watch me.

Sam Winchester: [shaky] Hey, Dad. It's Sam. Uh, you probably won't even get this, but, uh, it's Dean. He's sick, and uh... the doctors say there's nothing they can do. Um. But, uh, they don't know the things we know, right? Um. So, don't worry, cause, uh, I'm gonna do whatever it takes to get him better. All right. Just wanted you to know.

[as Dean fishes tasers out of the trunk]
Sam Winchester: What do you got those amped up to?
Dean Winchester: 100,000 volts.
Sam Winchester: Damn.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I want this Rawhead extra freakin' crispy. Now remember you only get one shot with these things, so make it count.

Dean Winchester: Come on Sam, a faith healer?
Sam Winchester: Maybe it's time to have a little faith, Dean.
Dean Winchester: You know what I got faith in? Reality. Knowin' what's really goin' on.
Sam Winchester: How can you be a skeptic? With the things we see every day?
Dean Winchester: Exactly, we see them! We know they're real!
Sam Winchester: But if you know evil's out there, how can you not believe good's out there too?
Dean Winchester: Because I've seen what evil does to good people!

Rev. Roy Le Grange: It is the Lord who does the healin' here, friends. The Lord, who guides me in choosin' who to heal, by helpin' me see into people's hearts.
Dean Winchester: [under his breath] Yeah, or into their wallets.
Rev. Roy Le Grange: You think so, young man?
[uncomfortable silence]
Dean Winchester: Sorry.
Rev. Roy Le Grange: No no, don't be. Just watch what you say around a blind man, we got real sharp ears. What's your name, son?
Dean Winchester: [clears his throat] Dean.
Rev. Roy Le Grange: [nodding thoughtfully] Dean. I want... I want you to come up here with me.
Dean Winchester: No. Nah, it's okay.
Sam Winchester: What're you doing?
Rev. Roy Le Grange: You've come here to be healed, haven't you?
Dean Winchester: Well yeah, but uh, maybe you should just pick someone else.
Dean Winchester: Oh no, I didn't, I didn't pick you Dean, the Lord did.
Sam Winchester: Get up there!
[Dean reluctantly stands and goes to the stage, the crowd applauds]
Rev. Roy Le Grange: You ready?
Dean Winchester: Yeah look, no disrespect, but uh, I'm not exactly a believer.
Rev. Roy Le Grange: You will be son. You will be. Pray with me, friends.
[the crowd falls silent, praying; the reverend lays his hand on Dean]
Rev. Roy Le Grange: All right now. All right now...
[Dean sinks to his knees and faints]
Sam Winchester: [running up] Dean!
[Dean jerks awake]
Sam Winchester: Say somethin'!
[Dean sees a gray old man in a suit appear, then turn and vanish]

Pool attendant: I'm telling you, he seemed healthy. Swam every day, didn't smoke, you know, so a heart attack just kinda seemed, you know, bizarre.
Sam Winchester: And you said he was running, right before he collapsed?
Pool attendant: Yeah, he was freakin' out. Said that somethin' was uh, was after him.
Sam Winchester: Did he say what?
Pool attendant: Well, thin air is what. I mean, it wasn't anything.
Sam Winchester: Right. Thanks.
[Sam starts up the stairs, notices a stopped clock]
Sam Winchester: Hey buddy? Your uh, your clock's busted.
Pool attendant: Oh yeah, we uh, we can't get it workin'. Just froze at 4:17.
Sam Winchester: Is that the same time Marshall died?
Pool attendant: How'd you know?

Dean Winchester: What'd you find out?
Sam Winchester: [quietly] I'm sorry.
Dean Winchester: Sorry 'bout what?
Sam Winchester: Marshall Hall... died at 4:17.
Dean Winchester: The exact time I was healed.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.

Sam Winchester: So, I put together a list: everyone Roy's healed, six people over the past year, and I cross-checked 'em with the local obits. Every time someone was healed, someone else died. And each time, the victim died of the same symptom Le Grange was healing at the time.
[cut to a woman jogging in the woods]
Dean Winchester: [voiceover] Someone's healed of cancer, someone else *dies* of cancer?
Sam Winchester: [voiceover] Somehow, Le Grange is trading a life for another.
Jogger: Hello?
[cut back to Dean and Sam]
Dean Winchester: Wait wait wait. So, Marshall Hall *died* to save me?
Sam Winchester: Dean. The guy probably would have died anyway. And someone else would've been healed.
Dean Winchester: [angry] You never should have brought me here.
Sam Winchester: Dean, I was just trying to save your life.
Dean Winchester: But Sam, some guy is dead now because of me!
Sam Winchester: I didn't know.
[cut to Le Grange about to heal an old man]
Rev. Roy Le Grange: Pray with me, friends.
Sam Winchester: [voiceover] The thing I don't understand, is how is Roy doing it? How, how is he trading a life for a life?
[cut to Dean]
Dean Winchester: Oh he's not doin' it.
[cut to the jogger]
Dean Winchester: Something else is doing it for him.
Sam Winchester: What do you mean?
Dean Winchester: The old man I saw onstage.
[the jogger turns around and sees the gray man; cut back to Dean and Sam]
Dean Winchester: I didn't want to believe it, but deep down, I knew it.
Sam Winchester: You knew what? What're you talkin' about?
Dean Winchester: There's only one thing that can give and take life like that. We're dealin' with a reaper.
[cut to the jogger running for her life; the reaper takes her]

Sam Winchester: You really think it's *the* Grim Reaper? Like, angel of death, collect your soul, the whole deal?
Dean Winchester: No no no, not *the* reaper, *a* reaper. There's reaper lore in pretty much every culture on earth, they go by a hundred different names. It's possible that there's more than one of 'em.
Sam Winchester: But you said you saw a dude in a suit.
Dean Winchester: Well what, you think he should 'a been workin' the whole black robe thing? You said it yourself that the clock stopped, right? Reapers stop time. And you can only see 'em when they're comin' at you, which is why I could see it and you couldn't.
Sam Winchester: Maybe.
Dean Winchester: There's nothin' else it could be, Sam! The question is, how's Roy controlling the damn thing?
Sam Winchester: That cross.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: There was this cross, I, I noticed it in the church tent, I knew I'd seen it before. Here.
[hands Dean a card]
Dean Winchester: A tarot?
Sam Winchester: It makes sense. I mean, tarot dates back to the early Christian era, right, when some priests were still using magic? And a few of them veered into the dark stuff, necromancy and how to push death away, how to cause it?
Dean Winchester: So Roy is using black magic to bind the reaper.
Sam Winchester: If he is, he's, he's ridin' the whirlwind, it's like puttin' a dog leash on a great white.

Dean Winchester: Okay then, we stop Roy.
Sam Winchester: How?
Dean Winchester: You know how.
Sam Winchester: Wait, what the hell are you talkin' about Dean, we can't *kill* Roy.
Dean Winchester: Sam the guy's playing God, he's deciding who lives and who dies, that's a monster in my book!
Sam Winchester: No, we're not gonna kill a human being, Dean! We do that, we're no better than he is.
Dean Winchester: Okay, so we can't kill Roy, we can't kill *death*. Any bright ideas, college boy?
Sam Winchester: Okay, uh, if Roy's using some kinda black spell on the reaper, we gotta figure out what it is. And how to break it.

[Sam finds the black altar with Dean's picture on it, his face crossed out in blood]
Sue Ann Grange: I gave your brother life, and I can take it away.
[Sam destroys the altar; Sue Ann traps him in the cellar]
Sue Ann Grange: Sam, can't you see? The Lord chose me! To reward the just and punish the wicked! And your brother is wicked, and he deserves to die just as Layla deserves to live! It's God's will. Goodbye, Sam.
[She leaves; Sam takes a piece of wood and uses it to punch out a window; cut to Roy about to heal Layla]
Rev. Roy Le Grange: Mrs. Rourke, pray with me now. Pray with me friends.
[cut to Dean in the parking lot; the lights go out around him, the reaper appears]
Rev. Roy Le Grange: All right now, all right now...
[Sue Ann chants, holding her cross, the reaper takes hold of Dean; Sam appears, snatches the cross from Sue Ann and smashes it]
Sue Ann Grange: No! Oh!
[the reaper releases Dean]
Rev. Roy Le Grange: [stopping] I don't understand.
Layla Rourke: I don't feel different.
[outside, Sue Ann falls to her knees before the broken cross]
Sue Ann Grange: My God! What have you done?
Sam Winchester: He's not your God.
Layla Rourke: Reverend?
Rev. Roy Le Grange: Sue Ann?
[the reaper appears to Sue Ann, grinning maliciously; she tries to run, but the reaper takes her]

"Supernatural: Changing Channels (#5.8)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: What are you watching?
Dean Winchester: Some kind of hospital show. "Dr. Sexy, M.D." It's based on a book.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] When did you hit menopause?
Dean Winchester: It's called channel surfing!

Dean Winchester: Just desserts. Sweet tooth. Screwin' with people before you kill 'em... We're dealin' with the Trickster aren't we?
Sam Winchester: Sure looks like.
Dean Winchester: Good. Been wantin' to gank that mother since Mystery Spot.
Sam Winchester: You sure?
Dean Winchester: Yeah I'm sure!
Sam Winchester: No I mean, are you sure you wanna kill him?
Dean Winchester: Sonofabitch didn't think twice about icing me. A *thousand* times.
Sam Winchester: No, I, I mean, I'm just sayin'...
Dean Winchester: What *are* you saying? You don't wanna kill him, then what?
Sam Winchester: Talk to him?
Dean Winchester: [bewildered] What?
Sam Winchester: Look, think about it, Dean. He's one of the most powerful creatures we've ever met. Maybe we can use him.
Dean Winchester: For what?
Sam Winchester: Okay, Trickster's like a, like a Hugh Hefner type, right? Wine, women, song? Maybe he doesn't want the party to end! I mean, maybe he hates this angels and demons stuff as much as we do. Maybe he'll help us.
Dean Winchester: You're serious.
Sam Winchester: Yeah!
Dean Winchester: Ally with the Trickster.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: A... bloody, violent monster, and you wanna be Facebook friends with him? Nice, Sammy.
Sam Winchester: The world is gonna end, Dean. We don't have the luxury of a moral stand. Look, I'm just sayin', it's worth a shot. That's all. If it doesn't work, we'll kill him.

Dean Winchester: We're *in* "Dr. Sexy, M.D." Dude, what the hell?
Sam Winchester: I don't know.
Dean Winchester: Seriously, what the hell!
Sam Winchester: I don't know!
Dean Winchester: One theory, any theory!
Sam Winchester: Uh, the Trickster trapped us in TV Land.
Dean Winchester: That's your theory? That's stupid!

Sam Winchester: Dean, how can this *possibly* be real?
Dean Winchester: I don't know, all right! Oh, but there goes Dr. Wang, the sexy but arrogant heart surgeon. And there's Johnny Drake. Well, he's not even alive, he's a ghost in the mind of... of her. The sexy but *neurotic* doctor over there.
Sam Winchester: So... *this* show has ghosts? Why?
Dean Winchester: I don't know. It *is* compelling.
Sam Winchester: I thought you said you weren't a fan.
Dean Winchester: I'm not. I'm not! Oh boy...
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: [grinning, star-struck] It's him.
Sam Winchester: Who?
Dean Winchester: It's him, it's Dr. Sexy!

Dean Winchester: [notices the doctor's footwear, slams him against the wall] You're not Dr. Sexy.
Dr. Sexy: You're crazy.
Dean Winchester: Really? Because I swore part of what makes Dr. Sexy sexy, is the fact that he wears cowboy boots. Not tennis shoes!
Sam Winchester: Yeah, you're not a fan...
Dean Winchester: It's a guilty pleasure!
Dr. Sexy: [to passersby] Call security.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, go ahead pal. See, we know what you are.
[their surroundings freeze, Dr. Sexy morphs into the Trickster]
Trickster: You guys are getting better!
Dean Winchester: Get us the hell outta here.
Trickster: Or what? Don't see your wooden stakes, big guy.
Sam Winchester: That was you on the police scanner, right? And this is a trick.
Trickster: [pointing to himself] Helloooo? Trickster! Come on, I heard you two yahoos were in town, how could I resist?

Sam Winchester: We need to talk to you. We need your help.
Trickster: Hmmm. Lemme guess. You two mutton-heads broke the world, and you want me to sweep up your mess.
Sam Winchester: Please, just five minutes. Hear us out.
Trickster: Sure. Tell you what. Survive the next twenty-four hours, we'll talk.
Dean Winchester: Survive what?
Trickster: The Game!
Dean Winchester: What game?
Trickster: You're in it!
Dean Winchester: How do we play?
Trickster: You're playing it.
Dean Winchester: What're the rules?
[Trickster wiggles his eyebrows and vanishes, the surroundings move]
Dean Winchester: Oh, son of a *bitch*.

[Dean has been shot, Sam is his surgeon]
Dean Winchester: Sam! Do somethin', come on!
Sam Winchester: I don't know how to use any of this crap!
Dean Winchester: Figure it out! Sam! Come on, I'm waiting!
Sam Winchester: Okay, um, I need a... penknife, some dental floss, a sewing needle, and a fifth of whiskey! Stat!

[Dean and Sam are trapped in a Japanese game show, there is a loud knocking noise]
Dean Winchester: Oh now what?
[the doors open, Castiel enters]
Dean Winchester: Cas?
Sam Winchester: Is this another trick?
Castiel: It's me!
[looks around, confused]
Castiel: Uh, what are you doing here?
Dean Winchester: Us? What are *you* doing here?
Castiel: Looking for you, you've been missing for days!
Sam Winchester: So get us the hell outta here, then!
Castiel: [reaching for them] Let's go!
[He blips out, vanishing]
Dean Winchester: Cas?
Game Show Host: No no no no. Mr. Trickster does not like pretty-boy angels!

Dean Winchester: How long do we have to keep doin' this?
Sam Winchester: [tense smile] I dunno. Maybe forever? We might die in here.
Dean Winchester: [addressing the unseen audience] How is that funny? Vultures.

[Castiel enters, looking worse for wear]
Dean Winchester: You okay?
Castiel: I don't have much time.
Sam Winchester: What happened?
Castiel: I got out.
Dean Winchester: From where?
Castiel: Listen to me! Something is not right, this thing is much more powerful than it should be.
Dean Winchester: What thing, the Trickster?
Castiel: If it *is* a Trickster.
Sam Winchester: What do you mean?
[Castiel gets flung against the wall, the Trickster enters, applause]
Trickster: Hello! Thank you! Thank you! Please, stop.
[Castiel gets up, his mouth is taped shut]
Trickster: [brightly] Hey, Castiel!
[the Trickster flicks a hand, Castiel vanishes]
Sam Winchester: You know him?
Dean Winchester: Where did you just send him?
Trickster: Relax. He'll live.
Trickster: Maybe.
Dean Winchester: [angry, advancing] All right, you know what? I'm done with the monkey dance. 'Kay? We get it.
Trickster: Yeah? Get what, Hot Shot?
Dean Winchester: Playing our roles, right? That's your game?
Trickster: That's *half* the game.
Sam Winchester: What's the other half?
Trickster: Play your roles, out there.
Dean Winchester: What's that supposed to mean?
Trickster: Oh you know! Sam, starring as Lucifer! Dean, starring as Michael! You're Celebrity Deathmatch! Play your roles!

Sam Winchester: [disbelieving] You want us to say "yes" to those sonsabitches?
Trickster: *Hells* yeah! Let's light this candle!
Sam Winchester: We do that, the world will *end*!
Trickster: Yeah? And... whose fault is that? Who popped Lucifer outta the box? Hm? Look. It's started. You started it. It can't be stopped. So let's get it over with!
Dean Winchester: Heaven or Hell, which side you on?
Trickster: I'm not on either side.
Dean Winchester: Yeah right. You're grabbin' ankle for Michael or Lucifer, which one is it?
Trickster: [huffs a laugh] You listen to me, you arrogant dick. I don't work for either of those SOBs. Believe me.
Dean Winchester: Hm. Oh, you're somebody's bitch.
[Trickster grabs Dean and slams him against the door]
Trickster: [fiercely] Don't you ever, *ever* presume to know what I am. Now listen very closely. Here's what's gonna happen. You're gonna suck it up, accept your responsibilities, and play the roles that destiny has chosen for you!
Sam Winchester: And if we don't?
Trickster: Then you'll stay here in TV Land. Forever. Three hundred channels and ah, nothin's on.
[he snaps his fingers, the scene changes]

Sam Winchester: You gotta calm down.
Dean Winchester: Calm down? I am wearing *sunglasses* at night! You know who does that? No-talent douchebags! I *hate* this game! I hate that we're in a procedural cop show, and you want to know why? Because I *hate* procedural cop shows! There's like three hundred of 'em on television, they're all the freakin' same, it's "ooh, a plane crashed here," oh shut up!

Dean Winchester: I'm worried, man. What that SOB did to Cas. Y'know, where is he?
[looks around the motel room, Sam is missing]
Dean Winchester: Sam? Where are you?
[calling Sam's cell as he walks out to the car]
Dean Winchester: Sam, it's me.
[getting in the car]
Dean Winchester: Where the hell did you go?
Sam Winchester: Dean?
[Dean looks around, the car is empty]
Dean Winchester: Sam? Where are you?
Sam Winchester: I don't know.
[Dean notices a console in the dash a la Knight Rider, Sam's voice is coming from it]
Sam Winchester: Oh crap. I don't think we killed the Trickster.
[cut to Dean driving Sam a la Knight Rider opening]
Dean Winchester: Okay, stake didn't work. So what, this another trick?
Sam Winchester: I don't know. Maybe the stake didn't work because it's not a trickster?
Dean Winchester: What do you mean?
Sam Winchester: You heard Cas. He said this thing was too powerful to *be* a trickster.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, and did you notice the way he looked at Cas? Almost like he knew him.
Sam Winchester: And how pissed he got when you brought up Michael and Lucifer.
Dean Winchester: Son of a bitch.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: I think I know what we're dealin' with.

[Dean is rummaging in Impala-Sam's trunk]
Sam Winchester: Dean?
Dean Winchester: [irritably] What?
Sam Winchester: That, uh, feels really... uncomfortable.
[Dean slams the trunk lid down]
Sam Winchester: Ow.

Sam Winchester: [stuck as the Impala] You sure this is gonna work?
Dean Winchester: No but I have no other ideas.
[yells at the sky]
Dean Winchester: All right you sonofabitch! Uncle! We'll do it!
Sam Winchester: Should I honk?
[the Trickster appears]
Trickster: Wow. Sam, get a load of the rims on you.
Sam Winchester: Eat me.
Trickster: [whistles] Okay, boys. Ready to go quietly?
Dean Winchester: Wo-wo-woah, not so fast. Nobody's goin' anywhere until Sam has opposable thumbs.
Trickster: What's the difference? Satan's gonna ride his ass one way or another.
[Dean gives him a look, the Trickster snaps his fingers, Sam steps out of the car]
Trickster: Happy?
Dean Winchester: Tell me one thing. Why didn't the stake kill you?
Trickster: I *am* the Trickster.
Dean Winchester: But maybe you're not.
[Sam flicks a lighter, throws it down; a ring of holy fire goes up around the Trickster]
Dean Winchester: Maybe you've always been an angel.
Trickster: [laughs] A *what*? Somebody slip a mickey in your power shake, kid?
Dean Winchester: I'll tell you what. You just jump out of the holy fire and, we'll call it our mistake.
[Trickster laughs, then turns sober and the scene flips back to the empty warehouse]
Trickster: [claps] Well played, boys. Well played. Where'd you get the holy oil?
Dean Winchester: Well you might say we pulled it outta Sam's ass.

Trickster: Where'd I screw up?
Sam Winchester: You didn't. Nobody gets the jump on Cas like you did.
Dean Winchester: Mostly it was the way you talked about Armageddon.
Trickster: Meaning?
Dean Winchester: Well, call it personal experience, but nobody gets that angry unless they're talkin' about their own family.
Sam Winchester: So which one are you? Grumpy, Sneezy or Douchey?
Trickster: Gabriel, okay? They call me Gabriel.

Dean Winchester: Okay, Gabriel. How does an Archangel become a trickster?
Trickster: My own, private, witness protection. I skipped outta Heaven, had a face transplant, carved out my own little corner of the world. 'Til you two screwed it all up.
Dean Winchester: And what'd Daddy say when you ran off and joined the pagans?
Trickster: Daddy doesn't say anything about anything.
Sam Winchester: Then what happened? Why'd you ditch?
Dean Winchester: Well do you blame him? I mean his brothers are heavy-weight douche-nozzles.
Trickster: [furious] Shut your cake-hole. You don't know anything about my family. I *loved* my father, and my brothers. Loved them! But watching them turn on each other? Tear at each other's throats? I couldn't bear it! Okay? So I left. And now it's happening all over again.
Sam Winchester: Then help us stop it!
Trickster: It can't be stopped!
Dean Winchester: You want to see the end of the world?
Trickster: I want it to be *over*! I have to sit back and watch my brothers kill each other, thanks to you two! Heaven, Hell, I don't care who wins! I just want it to be over!
Sam Winchester: It doesn't have to be like that! There has to be some way to, to pull the plug!
Trickster: [laughing] Oh-ho-ho-ho, you do *not* know my family. What you guys call the Apocalypse, I used to call Sunday dinner! That's why there's no stopping this. Because this isn't about a war, it's about two brothers who loved each other, and *betrayed* each other! You think you'd be able to relate!
Sam Winchester: [confused] What're you talkin' about?
Trickster: [looks from one to the other, whistles] You sorry sonsabitches. Why do you think you two are the vessels? Think about it! Michael, the big brother, loyal to an absent father. And Lucifer, the little brother, rebellious of Daddy's plan. You were born to this, boys. It's your destiny! It was *always* you! As it is in Heaven, so it must be on Earth! One brother has to kill the other.
Dean Winchester: So what the hell are you saying?
Trickster: Why do you think I've always taken such an interest in you? Because from the moment Dad flipped on the lights around here, we knew it was all gonna end with you. Always.
Dean Winchester: No. That's not gonna happen.
Trickster: [sadly] I'm sorry. But it is. Guys. I wish this were a TV show. Easy answers, endings wrapped up in a bow. But this is real. And it's gonna end bloody for all of us. That's just how it's gotta be.

Trickster: So, boys, now what? Stare at each other for the rest of eternity?
Dean Winchester: Well first of all you're gonna bring Cas back from wherever you stashed him.
Trickster: [sarcastic] Oh am I?
Dean Winchester: [angry] Yeah. Or we're going to *dunk* you in some holy oil, and deep-fry ourselves an archangel!
[Gabriel snaps his fingers, Castiel appears, injured and breathing hard]
Dean Winchester: Cas, you okay?
Castiel: [glaring at the archangel] I'm fine. Hello Gabriel.
Trickster: Hey bro. How's the search for Daddy going? Let me guess: awful.

"Supernatural: Provenance (#1.19)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: What kind of house doesn't have salt? Low sodium freaks!

Sam Winchester: I don't understand, Dean. We burned the damn thing!
Dean Winchester: Yeah, thank you, Captain Obvious.

Dean Winchester: And what was the... providence?
Sam Winchester: Provenance. It's a certificate of origin, like a biography, you know? We can use 'em to track the history of the pieces, see if anything's got a freaky past.
Dean Winchester: Huh. Well, we're not getting anything outta Chuckles, but uh, Sarah...
Sam Winchester: Yeah. Maybe you can get her to write it all down on a cocktail napkin.
Dean Winchester: Not me.
Sam Winchester: Oh, no no no no. Pickups are your thing, Dean.
Dean Winchester: It wasn't my butt she was checking out.

Sam Winchester: Why are you trying so hard to get me laid?
Dean Winchester: Why are you trying so hard to *not* get laid?

[Sam sees the painting is back in its frame after they torched it]
Sam Winchester: Oh My God!
Sarah Blake: What?
Sam Winchester: Uh... that painting... looks so good.
Sarah Blake: If you can call that monstrosity good, then, yeah... I guess.
Sam Winchester: So, what do you know about that painting?
Sarah Blake: Not much, just that it creeps me out. We sold it to the Telescas at a charity auction the night they were murdered.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, and you're just gonna sell it again?
Sarah Blake: As much as my Dad wants to, no. I won't let him. I think it'd be in bad taste.
Sam Winchester: Good. Yeah, you know what? Don't, don't, make sure you don't, okay?
Sarah Blake: Why? Don't tell me you're interested in that.
Sam Winchester: No, no, God, no, not in buying it, no. You know what? I gotta go, I've gotta take care of something. But um, I will call you back. I will call you. I'll see you later.

Dean Winchester: I think we need to take a little shore leave; just a little bit. What do you think, huh?
[gestures towards girl sitting at the bar]
Dean Winchester: I'm so in the door with this one.
Dean Winchester: I'm so in the door with this one.
Sam Winchester: [glances at her] So what are we today, Dean, um, rock stars? Are we Army Rangers?
Dean Winchester: Reality TV scouts looking for people with special skills. Well hey, it's not that far off, right?

Sam Winchester: You all right?
Sarah Blake: No, actually, I just lied to the cops and told them I went to Evelyn's, alone, and found her like that!
Sam Winchester: Thank you.
Sarah Blake: Don't thank me, I'm about to call 'em right back if you don't tell me what the hell's going on. Who's killing these people?
Sam Winchester: What.
Sarah Blake: What?
Sam Winchester: It's not who, it's what, is killing those people.
[Sarah looks at him, confused]
Sam Winchester: Sarah, you saw that painting move.
Sarah Blake: No. No, I was, I was seeing things! It's impossible!
Dean Winchester: Yeah well, welcome to our world.
Sam Winchester: Sarah, I know this sounds crazy, but we think that that painting is haunted.
Sarah Blake: You're joking.
Sarah Blake: You're *not* joking. God, the guys I go out with.
Sam Winchester: Sarah, think about it. Evelyn. The Telescas. They both had the painting. And there've been others before that, wherever this thing goes, people die. And we're just tryin' to stop it. And that's the truth.
Sarah Blake: Well then I guess you better show me. I'm coming with you.
Sam Winchester: What? No. Sarah, no, you should just go home. This stuff can get dangerous, and... and I don't want you to get hurt.
Sarah Blake: Look, you guys are probably crazy, but if you're right about this, well me and my Dad sold that painting, and we might have got these people killed. Look, I'm not saying I'm not scared, because I am scared as hell, but I'm not gonna run and hide either. So are we going, or what?
[she walks out the door]
Dean Winchester: Sam? Marry that girl.

Sarah Blake: [watching Sam and Dean dig up a grave] You guys seem to be uncomfortably comfortable with this.
Sam Winchester: Well, this isn't exactly the first grave we've dug. Still think I'm a catch?

[about the painting]
Sarah Blake: A fine example of American primitive, wouldn't you say?
Sam Winchester: Well *I'd* say, it's more Grant Wood than Grandma Moses. But you knew that. You just wanted to see if I did.
Sarah Blake: Guilty. And clumsy, I apologize. I'm Sarah Blake.
Sam Winchester: I'm Sam. This is my... brother, Dean.
[she turns to Dean, who is stuffing his face]
Sarah Blake: Dean! Can we get you some more mini quiche?

Dean Winchester: Grant Wood? Grandma Moses? What?
Sam Winchester: Art History course. It's good for meetin' girls.
Dean Winchester: It's like I don't even know you.

Librarian: You said the Isaiah Merchant family, right?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, that's right.
Librarian: I dug up every scrap of all the history I could find. So uh, are you boys crime buffs?
Dean Winchester: Kind of, yeah. Why do you ask?
Librarian: Well.
[he pulls out an old newspaper page with the headline "New Titanic Sinks"; underneath is a smaller article titled "Father Slaughters Family, Kills Self"]
Dean Winchester: Yes, yeah, that sounds about right.
Sam Winchester: The whole family was killed?
Librarian: It seems this Isaiah, he slits his kids' throats, then his wife, then himself. Now he was a barber by trade: used a straight razor.
Sam Winchester: Why'd he do it?
Librarian: [turning the paper over] Well, let's look.
Librarian: Uh, people who knew him described Isaiah as having stern and harsh temperament. Controlled his family with an iron fist, uh, wife, uh, two sons, adopted daughter, uh yeah, there were whispers that the wife was gonna take the kids and leave, um, which of course, you know, in that day and age... So instead, Old Man Isaiah, well, he gave 'em all a shave.
[draws a hand across his throat in a slitting motion; Dean laughs briefly]
Dean Winchester: Does it say what happened to the bodies?
Librarian: Just that they were all cremated.

Sam Winchester: [agitated] I'm telling you man, I'm sure of it! Painting at the auction house, Dad is looking down.
[shoving the copy from the history book across to Dean]
Sam Winchester: Painting here? Dad's looking out! The painting has changed, Dean!
Dean Winchester: Ah, so you think that uh, Daddy Dearest is trapped in the painting and is handing out Columbia Neckties like he did with his family?
Sam Winchester: Well yeah, it seems like it. But if his bones are already dusted, then how're we gonna stop him?
Dean Winchester: All right, well if Isaiah's position changed, then maybe some other things in the painting changed as well, you know, could give us some clues.
Sam Winchester: What, like a Da Vinci Code deal?
Dean Winchester: I don't... know, I'm just still waitin' on the movie for that one. Anyway we gotta get back in and see that painting.

Sam Winchester: Dude, enough already.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: What? Ever since we got here you've been tryin' to pimp me out to Sarah! Just, back off, all right?
Dean Winchester: Well you like her, don't you? All right, you like her, she likes you, you're both consenting adults...
Sam Winchester: What's the point, Dean? We'll just leave! We always leave!
Dean Winchester: Well I'm not talkin' about marriage, Sam!
Sam Winchester: You know, I don't get it. What do you care if I hook up?
Dean Winchester: Because then maybe you wouldn't be so cranky all the time.
[pause, Sam makes an exasperated noise]
Dean Winchester: You know, seriously Sam, this isn't about just hooking up, okay? I mean I, I think that this Sarah girl could be good for you. And I don't mean any disrespect, but I'm, I'm sure that this is about Jessica, right? Now I don't know what it's like to lose somebody like that, but... I would think that she would want you to be happy. God forbid have fun once in a while. Wouldn't she?
Sam Winchester: [softly] Yeah I know she would.
[Dean nods]
Sam Winchester: Yeah you're right. Part of this is about Jessica. But not the main part.
Dean Winchester: What's it about?
[pause, Sam looks away]
Dean Winchester: Yeah, all right.

Dean Winchester: It's the third bone yard we've checked. I think this ghost is jerkin' us around.
Sarah Blake: [to Sam] So this is what you guys do for a living?
Sam Winchester: Not exactly. We don't get paid.

[inside the Merchant family crypt; Sarah notices a doll entombed above the daughter's urn]
Sarah Blake: Okay, that right there, is the creepiest thing I've ever seen.
Sam Winchester: I was uh, sort of a tradition at the time. Whenever a child died, sometimes they'd preserve the kid's favorite toy in a glass case right next to the headstone or crypt.
Dean Winchester: You notice anything strange here?
Sarah Blake: Uh, where do I start?
Dean Winchester: No, that's not what I mean. Look at the urns.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, there are only four.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, Mom and the three kids. Daddy Dearest isn't here.

Sarah Blake: I don't mean to be forward, but, a girl could wait here forever. Is there something here, between us, or am I delusional?
Sam Winchester: You're not delusional...
Sarah Blake: But, there's a "but" coming.
Sam Winchester: But... I don't think this would be a good idea.
Sarah Blake: Can I ask why?
Sam Winchester: 'Cause I like you.
Sarah Blake: Wait, you, you lost me.
Sam Winchester: Look, it's hard to explain. It's just that when people are around me... I don't know, they get hurt.
Sarah Blake: What do you mean?
Sam Winchester: I mean like physically hurt. With what my brother and I do, it's...
Sam Winchester: Sarah... I had a girlfriend. And she died. And my Mom died, too. I don't know, it's like... it's like I'm cursed or somethin', like death just follows me around. Look, I'm not scared of much, but if I let myself have feelings for anybody...
Sarah Blake: You're scared they'd get hurt too. That's very sweet... And very archaic.

Sarah Blake: Look, I'm a big girl, Sam. And it's not your job to make decisions for me. There's always a chance of getting hurt...
Sam Winchester: I'm not talking about a broken heart and a tub of Haagen-Dazs. I'm talkin' about life and death.
Sarah Blake: And tomorrow I could get hit by a bus, that's what life is! Look, I know losing somebody you love, it's terrible. You shut yourself off, believe me, I know. But when you shut out pain, you shut out everything else, too.
Sam Winchester: Sarah, you don't understand, the pain that I went through... I can't go through it again. I can't.

[about the girl's ghost]
Dean Winchester: [on cell] How're we gonna waste her?
Sam Winchester: I dunno, she was already cremated, there's nothin' left to burn.
Dean Winchester: Well then how's she still around?
Sam Winchester: There must be somethin' else.
Sarah Blake: Sam wait! We used to handle antique dolls at the auction.
Sam Winchester: Well that's fascinating Sarah, but important right now?
Sarah Blake: Well back then, they used to make the dolls in the kid's image, I mean everything, like they, they would use the kid's real hair!
Sam Winchester: Dean? Sarah says the doll might have the girl's real hair. Human remains, same as bones.
Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester: The mausoleum!

"Supernatural: Route 666 (#1.13)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: Ah, my life was so simple. Just, school. Exams. Papers on polycentric cultural norms.
Dean Winchester: So I guess I saved you from a boring existence.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, occasionally I miss boring.
Dean Winchester: All right, so this killer truck...
Sam Winchester: [laughing] I miss conversations that didn't start with "this killer truck"!

[on the phone]
Dean Winchester: Maybe? Maybe! What if you were wrong?
Sam Winchester: Huh. Honestly, that thought hadn't occurred to me.
Dean Winchester: [hangs up] It honestly didn't occur to me!
Dean Winchester: I'm gonna kill him!

Sam Winchester: By 'old friend' you mean...?
Dean Winchester: Friend that's not new.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, thanks. So her name's Cassie, huh? You never mentioned her.
Dean Winchester: Didn't I?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, we went out.
Sam Winchester: You mean you dated someone. For more than one night.
Dean Winchester: Am I speakin' a language you're not gettin' here?

Sam Winchester: Which by the way, how does she know what we do?
[no response from Dean]
Sam Winchester: You told her. You told her the secret of our big family rule number one; we do what we do and we shut up about it! For a year and a half, I do nothing but lie to Jessica and you go out with this chick from Ohio a couple of times and you tell her everything! Dean!
Dean Winchester: Yeah. Looks like.

Sam Winchester: You mean you dated someone? For more than one night?
Dean Winchester: Am I speaking a language you're not getting here?

Cassie Robinson: [bringing in coffee on a tray] My mother's in pretty bad shape. I've been staying with her. I wish she wouldn't go off by herself, she's been so nervous and frightened. She was worried about Dad.
Dean Winchester: Why?
Cassie Robinson: He was scared, he was seeing things.
Dean Winchester: Like what?
Cassie Robinson: He swore he saw... an awful-looking black truck following him.
Sam Winchester: A truck. Who was the driver?
Cassie Robinson: He didn't talk about a driver. Just the truck. He said it would appear and disappear. And in the accident, Dad's truck was dented, like it'd been slammed into by something big.
[she hands them coffee]
Sam Winchester: Thanks. Now, you're sure this dent wasn't there before?
Cassie Robinson: He sold cars. Always drove a new one. There wasn't a scratch on that thing. It had rained hard that night, there was mud everywhere. There was a distinct set of muddy tracks from Dad's car, leading right to the edge, where he went over. One set of tracks. His!
Dean Winchester: And the first person killed was a friend of your father's?
Cassie Robinson: Best friend. Clayton Soames. They owned the car dealership together. Same thing. Dent, no tracks. And the cops said exactly what they said about Dad. He lost control of his car.
Dean Winchester: Now, can you think of any reason why your father and his partner might be targets?
Cassie Robinson: No.
Sam Winchester: And you think this vanishing truck ran him off the road?
Cassie Robinson: [embarrassed] Oh, when you say it aloud like that. Look, I'm a little skeptical about this... ghost stuff, or whatever you guys are into.
Dean Winchester: Huh. Skeptical. If I remember, I think you said I was nuts.

Sam Winchester: Where are you?
Dean Winchester: In the middle of nowhere, with a killer truck on my ass!

Sam Winchester: So burning the body had no effect on that thing?
Dean Winchester: Oh sure it did, now it's *really* pissed!

[Dean and Sam ask about the ghost truck]
Black Fisherman: Son this, this truck. Big scary monster-lookin' thing?
Dean Winchester: Yeah actually, I think so.
Black Fisherman: Hm.
Dean Winchester: What?
Black Fisherman: I have heard of a truck like that.
Sam Winchester: You have? Where?
Black Fisherman: Not where. When. Back in the sixties there was a string of deaths. Black men. Story goes, they disappeared in a big nasty black truck.
Dean Winchester: They ever catch the guy who did it?
Black Fisherman: Never found him. Hell, not sure they even really looked. See, there was a time, this town wasn't too friendly to all its citizens.

Dean Winchester: You know I was thinkin', you heard of the Flying Dutchman?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, a ghost ship infused with the captain's evil spirit, it was basically a part of him.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, so what if we're dealin' with the same thing? You know, a phantom truck, the extension of some bastard ghost, reenacting past crimes.
Sam Winchester: The victims have all been black men.
Dean Winchester: I think it's more than that, they all seem connected to Cassie and her family.

Sam Winchester: [about Cassie] Dean, what is goin' on between you two?
Dean Winchester: All right, so maybe we were a little bit more involved than I said.
Sam Winchester: Oh, okay.
Dean Winchester: Okay, a lot more. Maybe. And I told her the secret, about what we do, and I shouldn't have.
Sam Winchester: Ah look man, everybody's gotta open up to someone sometime.
Dean Winchester: Yeah I don't. It was stupid to get that close, I mean look how it ended.
[Sam smiles at him, amused]
Dean Winchester: Would you stop? Blink or somethin'!
Sam Winchester: You loved her.
Dean Winchester: [walking away] Aw God.
Sam Winchester: [following] You were in love with her... But you *dumped* her.
[pause, Dean looks uncomfortable]
Sam Winchester: Oh wow. She dumped *you*.
Dean Winchester: [irked] Get in the car.

[the Mayor has been killed]
Dean Winchester: So what happened?
Sam Winchester: Every bone crushed, internal organs turned to pudding, the cops are all stumped but it's almost like something ran him over.
Dean Winchester: Something like a truck?
Sam Winchester: Yup.
Dean Winchester: Tracks?
Sam Winchester: Nope.
Dean Winchester: What was the mayor doin' here anyway?
Sam Winchester: He owned the property, bought it a few weeks ago.
Dean Winchester: Yeah but he's white. It doesn't fit the pattern.
Sam Winchester: Killings didn't happen up on the road. Doesn't fit either.

Sam Winchester: [on cell] Okay, the courthouse records show that Mr. and Mrs. Mayor bought an abandoned property. The previous owner was the Dorian family, for like a hundred and fifty years.
Dean Winchester: Dorian?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [to Cassie] Didn't you say the Dorian family used to own this paper?
Cassie Robinson: Along with most everything else around here. They were pillars of the town.
Dean Winchester: Right, right.
[looking through articles]
Dean Winchester: That's interesting.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: This Cyrus Dorian, he vanished in April of '63, the case was investigated but never solved. That's right around the time the string of murders was goin' on back then.
Sam Winchester: Well, I pulled a bunch of paper up on the Dorian place, it must 'a been in bad shape when the mayor bought it.
Dean Winchester: Why's that?
Sam Winchester: The first thing he did was bulldoze the place.
Dean Winchester: [to Cassie] Mayor Todd knocked down the Dorian place?
Cassie Robinson: [nodding] It was a big deal, one of the oldest local houses left. He made the front page.
Dean Winchester: [to Sam] You got a date?
Sam Winchester: Uh... The third of last month.
Dean Winchester: Mayor Todd bulldozed the Dorian family home on the third; the first killing was the very next day.

[after the ghost truck threatens Cassie]
Dean Winchester: You didn't see who was drivin' the truck?
Cassie Robinson: It seemed to be no one. Everything was moving so fast. And then it was just gone. Why didn't it kill us?
Dean Winchester: Whatever's controlling the truck wants you afraid first.
Sam Winchester: Mrs. Robinson. Cassie said that your husband saw the truck before he died.
Cassie Robinson: Mom?
Mrs. Robinson: [distracted] Hm? Oh, uh, Martin was under a lot of stress, he... I can't be sure about what he was seeing.
Dean Winchester: Well after tonight I think we can be reasonably sure that he was seein' a truck. What happened tonight, you and Cassie are marked. Okay? Now your daughter could die. So if you know something now would be a really good time to tell us about it.
Cassie Robinson: Dean...
Mrs. Robinson: Yes. Yes, he said he saw a truck.
Sam Winchester: Did he know who it belonged to?
Mrs. Robinson: He thought he did.
Dean Winchester: Who was that?
Mrs. Robinson: Cyrus. A man named Cyrus.

Mrs. Robinson: Cyrus Dorian died more than forty years ago.
Dean Winchester: How do you know he died, Mrs. Robinson? The paper said he went missing. How do you know he died?
Mrs. Robinson: We were all very young. I dated Cyrus awhile. I, I was also seeing Martin, in secret of course, because, interracial couples didn't go over too well then. When I broke it off with Cyrus, and when he found out about Martin... I don't know, he, he changed. His, his hatred. His hatred was frightening.
Sam Winchester: The string of murders.
Mrs. Robinson: There were rumors. People of color disappearing into some kind of a truck. Nothing was ever done. Martin and uh, Martin and I, we were gonna be uh, married in that little church near here, but uh, last minute we decided to elope, because we didn't want all the attention.
Dean Winchester: And Cyrus?
Mrs. Robinson: [crying] The day we set for the wedding, was the day someone set fire to the church. There was a children's choir practice in there! They all died.
Sam Winchester: Did the attacks stop after that?
Mrs. Robinson: No! There was one more. One night, that truck came for Martin. Cyrus beat him something terrible. But Martin, you see, Martin got loose, and he started hitting Cyrus and he just kept hitting him and h-hitting him!
Dean Winchester: Why didn't you call the cops?
Mrs. Robinson: This was forty years ago! He called on his friends, Clayton Soames and Jimmy Anderson, and they put Cyrus's body into the truck and rolled it into the swamp at the edge of his land and all three of them kept that secret all these years.
Sam Winchester: And now all three are gone.
Dean Winchester: So is Mayor Todd. Now he said, that you of all people would know that he is not a racist. Why would he say that?
Mrs. Robinson: He was a good man. He was a young deputy back then, investigating Cyrus's disappearance. Once he figured out what Martin and the others had done, he... he did nothing. Because he also knew what Cyrus had done.
Cassie Robinson: Why didn't you tell me?
Mrs. Robinson: I thought I was protecting him. And now there's no one left to protect!
Dean Winchester: Yes there is.
[he looks at Cassie]

Sam Winchester: [about Cassie] I like her.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: You meet someone like her... Ever make you wonder if it's worth it? Putting everything else on hold, doing what we do?
[long pause, Dean fishes sunglasses out of the glove compartment, puts them on and leans back in his seat]
Dean Winchester: Why don't you wake me up when it's my turn to drive?

Sam Winchester: What's interesting is you guys never really look at each other at the same time. You look at her when she's not lookin'. She checks you out when you look away.
[At Dean's hard look]
Sam Winchester: It's just a... just an interesting observation in a... you know? observationally interesting way.
Dean Winchester: You think we might have some more pressing issues here?
Sam Winchester: Hey, if, if I'm hittin' a nerve...
Dean Winchester: Oh, let's go!

"Supernatural: Bugs (#1.8)" (2005)
Dean Winchester: So what are you saying, that Dad was disappointed in you?
Sam Winchester: Was? Is. Always has been.
Dean Winchester: Why would you think that?
Sam Winchester: Because, I didn't want to bow-hunt. Or hustle pool. Because I wanted to go to school and live my life, which in *our* whacked-out family made *me* the freak.
Dean Winchester: Yeah you were kinda like the blonde chick in The Munsters!

Sam Winchester: So a bunch of skeletons in an unmarked grave...
Dean Winchester: Yeah. Maybe this is a haunting. Pissed-off spirits with some unfinished business?
Sam Winchester: Yeah maybe. The question is, why bugs? And why now?
Dean Winchester: Uh, that's two questions...

Dean Winchester: We got a new gig, or what?
Sam Winchester: Maybe. Oasis Plains, Oklahoma. Not far from here. Gas company employee. Dustin Burwash, supposedly died from Creutzfeldt-Jakob.
Dean Winchester: Huh?
Sam Winchester: Human mad cow disease.
Dean Winchester: Mad cow. Wasn't that on Oprah?
Sam Winchester: [giving him a look] You watch Oprah?

Sam Winchester: We're gonna squat in an empty house?
Dean Winchester: I wanna try the steam shower.

Dean Winchester: Growing up in a place like this would freak me out.
Sam Winchester: Why?
Dean Winchester: The manicured lawns. 'How was your day, Honey'. I'd blow my brains out!
Sam Winchester: There's nothing wrong with normal.
Dean Winchester: I'd take our family over normal any day.

[after Sam checks out the sinkhole where Dustin Burwash died]
Dean Winchester: [sarcastic] So you found some beetles, in a hole, in the ground. That's shocking, Sam!
Sam Winchester: There were no tunnels, no tracks, no evidence of any other kind of creature down there. You know, some beetles do eat meat. Now it's usually *dead* meat, but...
Dean Winchester: How many did you find down there?
Sam Winchester: Ten.
Dean Winchester: It'd take a whole lot more than that to eat out some dude's brain.
Sam Winchester: Well maybe there were more!

Sam Winchester: [about Larry with his son] Remind you of somebody?
[Dean looks at them, confused]
Sam Winchester: Dad?
Dean Winchester: [surprised] Dad never treated us like that.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] Well Dad never treated YOU like that, you were perfect. He was all over my case.
[Dean thinks about it, shakes his head]
Sam Winchester: You don't remember.
Dean Winchester: Well, maybe he had to raise his voice, but sometimes you were out of line!
Sam Winchester: [sarcastic] Right, right, like when I said I'd rather play soccer than learn bow-hunting.
Dean Winchester: Bow-hunting's an important skill!

Larry Pike: So you two are interested in Oasis Plains.
Dean Winchester: Yes sir!
Larry Pike: Let me just say, we accept homeowners of any race, religion, color, or... sexual orientation.
[Sam chuckles]
Dean Winchester: [quickly] We're brothers.
Sam Winchester: Our father is getting on in years, and we're just lookin' for a place for him.
Larry Pike: Great! Great, well, seniors are welcome too. Come on in.

Sam Winchester: [about Lynda Bloome being killed by spiders] You tried to scare her with a spider.
Matt Pike: Wait, you think I had something to do with that?
Dean Winchester: You tell us.
Matt Pike: That tarantula was a *joke*. Anyway, that wouldn't explain the bee attack, or the gas company guy.
Sam Winchester: You know about those?
Matt Pike: There *is* somethin' goin' on here. I dunno what, but... something's happening with the insects. Lemme show you somethin'.
[they start walking through the woods]
Sam Winchester: So if you knew about all this bug stuff, why not tell your Dad? Maybe he could clear everybody out.
Matt Pike: Believe me I've tried, but uh, "Larry" doesn't listen to me.
Sam Winchester: Why not?
Matt Pike: Mostly? He's too disappointed in his freak son.

[Matt brings them to a clearing in the woods; insects are heard all around]
Matt Pike: I've been keeping track of insect populations, it's um, part of an AP science class.
Dean Winchester: You two are like peas in a pod.
Sam Winchester: What's been happening?
Matt Pike: Well, a lot. I mean, from bees to earthworms, uh, beetles, you name it, it's like they're congregating here.
Dean Winchester: Why?
Matt Pike: I don't know.
[Sam notices a dark mound of earth at the other edge of the clearing]
Sam Winchester: What's that?
[they walk over to it; Dean taps it with a foot, a chunk collapses into a hole; Dean pokes around in it with a stick, hitting something hard]
Dean Winchester: There's something down there.
[he reaches in, trying to dislodge it]
Dean Winchester: Come on, come on...
[he unearths a human skull]

[Dean and Sam find an old Indian playing cards in a diner]
Sam Winchester: Joe White Tree?
[he nods]
Sam Winchester: We'd like to ask you a few questions, if that's all right.
Dean Winchester: We're students from the university.
Joe White Tree: No you're not. You're lying.
Dean Winchester: Um. Well, truth is...
Joe White Tree: You know who starts sentence with "truth is"? Liars.
[Dean looks at Sam]
Sam Winchester: Have you heard of Oasis Plains? It's a housing development, near the Otoka Valley.
[White Tree looks at Dean]
Joe White Tree: I like him. He's not a liar.

Sam Winchester: Something... Something bad, is happening in Oasis Plains. We think, it might have something to do with some old bones we found down there. Native American bones.
Joe White Tree: [nodding] I'll tell you what my grandfather told me. What his grandfather told him. Two hundred years ago, a band of my ancestors lived in that valley. One day, American cavalry came to relocate them. They were resistant, the cavalry impatient. As my grandfather put it, on a night the moon and the sun shared the sky as equals, the cavalry first raided our village. They murdered, raped... The next day, the cavalry came again, and the next and the next. And on the sixth night the cavalry came one last time, and by the time the sun rose, every man, woman and child still in the village was dead. They say on the sixth night as the chief of the village lay dying, he whispered to the heavens, that no white man would ever tarnish this land again. Nature would rise up and protect the valley. And it would bring as many days of misery and death to the white man, as the cavalry had brought upon his people.
Dean Winchester: Insects. Sounds like nature to me. Six days.
Joe White Tree: And on the night of the sixth day, none would survive.

Sam Winchester: So every year about this time, anybody in Oasis Plains is in danger. Larry built his neighborhood on cursed land.
Dean Winchester: And on the sixth night, that's tonight!
Sam Winchester: If we don't do something, Larry's family will be dead by sunrise. So how do we break the curse?
Dean Winchester: You don't break a curse. You get out of its way. We gotta get those people out, now.

Matt Pike: [on cell] Hello?
Sam Winchester: Matt, it's Sam!
Matt Pike: [freaked] Sam, my backyard's crawling with cockroaches!
Sam Winchester: Matt, just listen, you have to get your family out of that house, right now, okay?
Matt Pike: What, why?
Sam Winchester: Because something's coming.
Matt Pike: More bugs.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, a lot more.
Matt Pike: My Dad doesn't listen in the best of circumstances, what am I supposed to tell him?
Sam Winchester: You gotta *make* him listen, okay?
Dean Winchester: Gimme the phone, gimme the phone!
[Sam hands him the cell]
Dean Winchester: Matt! Under no circumstances are you to tell the truth, he'll just think you're nuts!
Matt Pike: But, but he's my...
Dean Winchester: Tell him you have a sharp pain in your right side and you gotta go to the hospital, okay?
Matt Pike: Yeah. Yeah, okay.
[hangs up]
Dean Winchester: [to Sam] Make him listen. What're you thinkin'?

Larry Pike: Get off my property before I call the cops!
Sam Winchester: Mr. Pike, listen...
Matt Pike: Dad, they're just trying to help!
Larry Pike: [to Matt] Get in the house!
Matt Pike: Sorry, I... told him the truth.
Dean Winchester: We had a plan, Matt, what happened to the plan?
Sam Winchester: Look, it's twelve am. They are coming, any minute now. You need to get your family and *go*, before it's too late!
Larry Pike: [sarcastic] Oh yeah, you mean before the Biblical swarm.
Dean Winchester: Larry, what do you think really happened to that realtor? Huh? And the gas company guy. You don't think somethin' weird's goin' on around here?

Larry Pike: Look, I don't know who you are, but you're crazy. You come near my boy or my family again, we're gonna have a problem!
Dean Winchester: Well, I hate to be a downer, but we got a problem right now.
Matt Pike: Dad, they're right, okay? We're in danger!
Larry Pike: Matt, get inside, now!
Matt Pike: No! Why won't you listen to me?
Larry Pike: Because this is crazy, it doesn't make any sense!
Sam Winchester: Look! This land is *cursed*! People have *died* here! Now you're really gonna take that risk with your *family*?
Dean Winchester: Wait. Do you hear it?
[a buzzing noise]
Larry Pike: What the hell?
[the bug zapper starts crackling with insects]
Larry Pike: All right, it's time to go. Larry, get your wife.
[Larry starts for the door]
Matt Pike: Guys?
[a cloud of insects swarms over the tree-line]
Larry Pike: Oh my God...
Sam Winchester: We'll never make it.
Dean Winchester: Everybody in the house! Go!
[they run]

Sam Winchester: I want to find Dad.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, me too.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, but I just... I wanna apologize to him.
Dean Winchester: For what?
Sam Winchester: All the things I said to him. He was just doin' the best he could.
Dean Winchester: Well, don't worry, we'll find him. And you'll apologize... and then within five minutes you'll be at each others' throats.
[Sam laughs]
Sam Winchester: Yeah, probably. Let's hit the road.
Dean Winchester: Let's.

"Supernatural: Hook Man (#1.7)" (2005)
Dean Winchester: Your, uh, half-caff double vanilla latte is getting cold over here, Francis.
Sam Winchester: Bite me.

[Dean falls on top of Sam as they sneak through a half open window]
Dean Winchester: Oh, sorry!
Sam Winchester: OK, be quiet!
Dean Winchester: Me be quiet? You be quiet!

Dean Winchester: So you believe her.
Sam Winchester: I do.
Dean Winchester: Yea, I think she's hot too.

Cute Librarian: Here you go. Arrest records, going back to 1851.
Dean Winchester: Thanks.
[to Sam]
Dean Winchester: So, this is how you spent four good years of your life, huh?
Sam Winchester: Welcome to higher education.

Dean Winchester: Saved your ass! Talked the sheriff down to a fine, dude, I'm Matlock!
Sam Winchester: But how?
Dean Winchester: Told him you were a dumb-ass pledge and that we were hazing you.
Sam Winchester: What about the shotgun?
Dean Winchester: I said that you were hunting ghosts and the spirits were repelled by rock salt. You know, typical Hell Week prank.
Sam Winchester: And he believed you?
Dean Winchester: Well, you *look* like a dumb-ass pledge.

Dean Winchester: Man, you've been holding out on me. This college thing is awesome!
Sam Winchester: This wasn't really my experience.
Dean Winchester: Let me guess. Libraries, studying, straight A's?
[Sam nods]
Dean Winchester: What a geek.

Sam Winchester: And listen to this, she heard scratching on the roof, found the bloody body suspended upside-down over the car.
Dean Winchester: Bloody body suspended, that sounds like the...
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I know, the Hook-Man legend.
Dean Winchester: That's one of the most famous urban legends ever, you don't think that we're dealing with *the* Hook-Man?
Sam Winchester: Every urban legend has a source. The place where it all began.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, but what about the phantom scratches and the tire punctures, and the invisible killer?
Sam Winchester: Maybe the Hook-Man isn't a man at all, what if it's some kind of spirit?

Sam Winchester: Hey, check this out. 1862, a preacher named Jacob Carnes was arrested for murder. It was like, he was so angry over the red-light district in town that one night he killed thirteen prostitutes. Uh, right here, "some of the deceased were found in their beds, sheets soaked with blood, others suspended upside-down from the limbs of trees as a warning against sins of the flesh."
Dean Winchester: Get this, the murder weapon? Looks like the preacher lost his hand in an accident, had it replaced with a silver hook.
Sam Winchester: Look where all this happened.
Dean Winchester: Nine Mile Road.
Sam Winchester: Same place where the frat boy was killed.
Dean Winchester: Nice job Dr. Venkman. Let's check it out.

[Sam and Dean sneak into the sorority house where Lori's roommate has been murdered; they see the message scratched on the wall]
Sam Winchester: "Aren't you glad you didn't turn on the light." That's right out of the legend.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, that's classic Hook-Man all right.
[touching his nose]
Dean Winchester: And it's definitely a spirit.
Sam Winchester: Yeah. I've never smelled ozone this strong before.

Sam Winchester: It was bugging me, right, so how is the Hook-Man tied up with Lori? So I think I came up with something.
[hands Dean news articles]
Dean Winchester: 1932, clergyman arrested for murder. 1967, seminarian held in hippie rampage...
Sam Winchester: There's a pattern here. In both cases the suspect was a man of religion who openly preached against immorality, and then found himself wanted for killings he claimed were the work of an invisible force. Killings carried out, get this: with a sharp instrument.
Dean Winchester: What's the connection to Lori?
Sam Winchester: A man of religion? Who openly preaches against immorality?
[Dean nods, getting it]
Sam Winchester: Except, maybe this time instead of saving the whole town, he's just trying to save his own daughter.
Dean Winchester: Reverend Sorenson. You think he's summoning the spirit?
Sam Winchester: Maybe. Or, you know how a poltergeist can haunt a person, instead of a place?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, the spirit latches onto the reverend's repressed emotions, feeds off them, yeah, okay.
Sam Winchester: Without the reverend ever even knowing it.
Dean Winchester: Either way, you should keep an eye on Lori tonight.
Sam Winchester: What about you?
[Dean looks at the party, disappointed]
Dean Winchester: [sighs] I'm gonna go see if I can find that unmarked grave.

Lori Sorenson: No one will talk to me anymore, except you. The sheriff thinks I'm a suspect, and you know what my Dad'll say? Pray. Have faith. What does *he* know about faith?
Sam Winchester: I heard you guys fighting before.
Lori Sorenson: He's seeing a woman. A *married* woman. I just found out. She comes to our church with her husband. I know her kids. And he talks to me about religion? About morality? It's like on one hand, you know, just do what you want and be happy! But, he taught me, raised me to believe that if you do something wrong, you will get punished. I just don't know what to think anymore.
[she leans in, they hug and start to kiss; but Sam breaks away]
Lori Sorenson: Sam?
Sam Winchester: Lori. I can't.
Lori Sorenson: [understanding] That someone you lost? I'm sorry.

Sam Winchester: I don't think the spirit is latching on to the reverend.
Dean Winchester: Well yeah, the guy wouldn't send the Hook-Man after *himself*.
Sam Winchester: I think it's latching onto Lori. Last night she found out that her father is having an affair with a married woman.
Dean Winchester: So what?
Sam Winchester: So, she's upset about it. She's upset about the *immorality* of it. She told me she was raised to believe, if you do something wrong, you get punished.
Dean Winchester: Okay, so she's conflicted, and the spirit of Preacher Carnes is latching onto her repressed emotions and maybe he's doing the punishing for her. Huh?
Sam Winchester: Right. Rich comes on too strong. Taylor tried to make her into a party girl. Dad has an affair.
Dean Winchester: Remind me not to piss this girl off. But I burned those bones, I buried them in salt, why didn't that stop him?
Sam Winchester: You must've missed something.
Dean Winchester: No. I burned everything in that coffin.
Sam Winchester: Did you get the hook?
Dean Winchester: The hook?

[about the hook]
Sam Winchester: Well, it was the murder weapon, and, in a way, it was part of him.
Dean Winchester: So like the bones, the hook is the source of his power!
Sam Winchester: So if we find the hook...
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: [together] We stop the Hook-man!

Dean Winchester: [looking through records] Here's somethin' I think. Logbook, Iowa state penitentiary, Carnes, Jacob, personal effects, disposition thereof.
Sam Winchester: Does it mention the hook?
Dean Winchester: Maybe. "Upon execution, all earthly items shall be remanded to the prisoner's house of worship, St. Barnabus Church."
Sam Winchester: Isn't that where Lori's father preaches?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: Where Lori *lives*?
Dean Winchester: Maybe that's why the Hook-man's been haunting reverends and reverends' daughters for the last two hundred years.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, but if the hook were at the church or Lori's house, don't you think someone might have seen it? I mean, a blood-stained, silver-handled hook?
Dean Winchester: Check the church records.
Sam Winchester: [checking] St. Barnabus, donations, 1862, received, silver-handled hook, from State Penitentiary. Reforged. They melted it down. Made it into something else.

[Sam and Dean find Lori praying and crying in the church; Sam approaches her]
Sam Winchester: Lori?
Lori Sorenson: [looking up] What are you doing here?
Sam Winchester: What is it?
Lori Sorenson: I've been trying to understand what's been happening. Why. Now I know, so I'm praying for forgiveness.
Sam Winchester: Forgiveness for what?
Lori Sorenson: Don't you see? I'm to blame for all this. I've read in the Bible about avenging angels...
Sam Winchester: Trust me, this guy, he's no angel.
Lori Sorenson: I was so angry at my father. Part of me *wanted* him punished. And then he came and he punished him.
Sam Winchester: It's not your fault.
Lori Sorenson: Yes it is! I don't know how, but it is. I killed Rich, Taylor too. I nearly killed my father.
[the shadow of the Hook-man materializes and vanishes, unnoticed]
Sam Winchester: Lori...
Lori Sorenson: I can see it now. They didn't deserve to be punished. I do.
[a rushing sound; the candles on the altar go out]

[the Hook-man is attacking them; Sam is wounded trying to protect Lori; Dean runs up behind with the shotgun]
Dean Winchester: SAM! DROP!
[Sam drops; Dean shoots the Hook-man with salt rounds]
Sam Winchester: I thought we got all the silver!
Dean Winchester: So did I!
Sam Winchester: Then why is he still here?
Dean Winchester: Well maybe we missed somethin'!
[Sam looks around, notices Lori's cross]
Sam Winchester: Lori, where'd you get that chain?
Lori Sorenson: [bewildered] M-my father gave it to me!
Dean Winchester: Where'd your Dad get it?
Lori Sorenson: He said it was a church heirloom, he gave it to me when I started school...
Sam Winchester: Is it silver?
Lori Sorenson: Yes!
[Sam yanks the chain from her neck, tosses it to Dean; scratches begin to drag across the walls]
Dean Winchester: Sam!
[tosses Sam the shotgun and salt rounds, Sam holds off the Hook-man while Dean runs downstairs and throws the necklace in the fire]

"Supernatural: Abandon All Hope (#5.10)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: It's Crowley, right?
Crowley: So, the Hardy Boys finally found me. Took you long enough.
[he approaches, looks down at the rug, turns it up to find the Devil's Trap painted underneath]
Crowley: Do you have any idea how much this rug cost?
[demons come up from behind and restrain the brothers; Crowley holds up the Colt]
Crowley: This is it, right? This is what it's all about.
[raises the gun, shoots the two demons holding them; the brothers look at each other in confusion]
Crowley: We need to talk. Privately.
Dean Winchester: What the hell is this?
Crowley: Do you know how deep I could have buried this thing? There's no reason you or anyone should know this even exists at all. Except that I told you.
Sam Winchester: *You* told us?
Crowley: Rumors. Innuendo. Sent out on the grapevine.
Sam Winchester: Why? Why tell us anything?
Crowley: [pointing the Colt at Dean] I want you, to take this thing to Lucifer, and empty it into his face.
Dean Winchester: Uh-huh. Okay, and why, exactly would *you* want the Devil dead?
Crowley: [putting the Colt down] It's called survival. But I forgot, you two at best are functional morons.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, you're functioning morons... more.

Crowley: Lucifer isn't a demon. Remember? He's an angel, an angel famous for his hatred of humankind. To him you're just filthy bags of pus. That's the way he feels about *you*. What can he think about us?
Sam Winchester: But he *created* you.
Crowley: To him we're just servants. Cannon fodder. If Lucifer manages to exterminate humankind, we're next. So. Help me. Huh? Let's all go back to simpler, better times, back to when we could all follow our natures! I'm in *sales*, damn it. So what do you say? What if I give you this thing, and you go kill the Devil?
[he holds out the Colt, Sam hesitantly takes it]
Sam Winchester: Okay.
Crowley: [grinning] Great.
Sam Winchester: You wouldn't happen to know where the Devil *is*, perchance, would you?
Crowley: Thursday... Birdies tell me he has an appointment in Carthage, Missouri.
Sam Winchester: Great. Thanks.
[he puts the Colt to Crowley's head, pulls the trigger, nothing happens]
Crowley: Oh yeah, right, you probably need some more ammunition.

Dean Winchester: You know, trap or no trap, if we got a snowball's chance we gotta take it, right?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I suppose.
Dean Winchester: 'Sides, I'm not sure it is a trap. Check it out, I mean Carthage is lit up like a Christmas tree with revelation omens. And, look at this. There's been six missing persons reported in town since Sunday. I think the Devil's there.
Sam Winchester: Okay.
Dean Winchester: But if we think about it, you can't come with.
Sam Winchester: Dean.
Dean Winchester: Look, I go against Satan and screw the pooch. Okay, we've lost a game piece, that we can take. But if you're there, then we are handing the Devil's vessel right over to him. That's not smart.
Sam Winchester: Since when have we ever done anything smart?
Dean Winchester: I'm serious, Sam.
Sam Winchester: So am I! Now have we learned a damn thing? If we're gonna do this, we're gonna do it *together*.
Dean Winchester: Okay. But it's a stupid freakin' idea.

Bobby Singer: Everybody, get in here. It's time for the line-up. Usual suspects, in the corner.
Ellen Harvelle: Oh come on, Bobby, nobody wants their picture taken.
Sam Winchester: Hear hear.
Bobby Singer: Shut up, you're drinkin' my beer. Anyway, I'm gonna need somethin' to remember your sorry asses by.
Ellen Harvelle: Ha, always good to have an optimist around.
Castiel: Bobby's right.
[Dean looks at him]
Castiel: Tomorrow we hunt the Devil. This is our last night on Earth.
[the picture snaps]

Dean Winchester: So now we know where the Devil's gonna be, we know when, and we have the Colt.
Sam Winchester: Yeah. We just have to get past, eight or so Hellhounds and get to the farm by midnight.
Dean Winchester: And that's after we get Jo and Ellen the hell outta town.
Sam Winchester: Won't be easy.
Dean Winchester: Stretcher?
Sam Winchester: I'll see what we got.
Jo Harvelle: Stop. Guys, stop. Can we uh, be realistic about this please? I can't move my legs. I can't be moved. My guts are bein' held in by an Ace bandage. We gotta... we gotta get our priorities straight here. Number one, I'm not going anywhere.
Ellen Harvelle: Joanna Beth, you stop talkin' like that.
Jo Harvelle: Mom. I can't fight. I can't walk. But I could do something. We've got propane, wiring, rock salt, iron nails, everything we need.
Sam Winchester: Everything we need?
Jo Harvelle: To build a bomb, Sam.
Dean Winchester: No. Jo, no.
Jo Harvelle: You got another plan? You got *any* other plan? Those are Hellhounds out there Dean. They've got all of our scents. Those bitches will *never* stop coming after you. We let the dogs in, make a break for the building next over, and I can wait here with my finger on the button. Rip those mutts a new one. Or at least get you a few minutes head start anyway.
Ellen Harvelle: No, I, I won't let you!
Jo Harvelle: This is why we're here, right? If I could get us a shot on the Devil... Dean we have to take it.
Ellen Harvelle: No! That's not...
Jo Harvelle: Mom. This might literally be your last chance to treat me like an adult? You might want to take it?
Ellen Harvelle: [crying] Well you heard her. Get to work.

[Ellen is staying behind with Jo]
Jo Harvelle: Mom, no.
Ellen Harvelle: Somebody's gotta let 'em in. Like you said, you're not movin'. You got me, Jo. And you're right. This is important. But I will not leave you here alone.
Sam Winchester: Dean...
Ellen Harvelle: Get goin' now boys.
Dean Winchester: Ellen...
Ellen Harvelle: I said go. And Dean? Kick it in the ass. Don't miss.
[they go; Ellen takes the chain off the door, breaks the salt line, preps the bomb]
Ellen Harvelle: [to Jo] I will always love you, baby. Honey?
[Jo is dead; Ellen sobs]
Ellen Harvelle: It's okay, it's okay. That's my good girl.
[the hellhounds approach, Ellen feels the breath of one on her face]
Ellen Harvelle: You can go straight back to hell you ugly bitch!
[she presses the button, the building explodes]

Sam Winchester: Last words?
Dean Winchester: I think I'm good.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, me too.
Dean Winchester: Here goes nothin'.
Sam Winchester: [to Lucifer, cocking his rifle] Hey! You wanted to see me?
Lucifer: Oh Sam, you don't need that gun here. You know I'd never hurt you. Not really.
Dean Winchester: [putting the Colt to Lucifer's head] Yeah? Well I'd hurt you. So suck it!
[he fires, Lucifer falls, pause]
Lucifer: [gasping] *Oowww*.
Lucifer: Where did you get that?
[sends Dean flying into a tree, turns back to Sam, the wound in his head vanishing]
Lucifer: Now. Where were we?

Lucifer: Don't feel too bad, Sam. There's only five things in all of creation that that gun can't kill and, I just happen to be one of them. But if you gimme a minute? I'm almost done.
[goes back to digging, Sam checks on Dean]
Lucifer: You know, I don't suppose you'd just say yes right here and now, end this whole tiresome discussion? That's crazy, right?
Sam Winchester: [fiercely] It's NEVER gonna happen!
Lucifer: Oh I don't know Sam. I think it will. I think it'll happen soon. Within six months. And I think it'll happen... in Detroit.
Sam Winchester: You listen to me, you sonofabitch. I'm gonna kill you myself! You understand me? I'm going to rip your *heart* out!
Lucifer: That's good, Sam. You keep fanning that fire in your belly. All that pent-up rage? I'm gonna need it.
Sam Winchester: [looking at the men standing around] What did you do? What did you do to this town?
Lucifer: Oh, I was very generous with this town. One demon for every able-bodied man.
Sam Winchester: And the rest of them?
Lucifer: [gesturing at the pit he's been filling in] In there. I know it's awful but, these Horsemen are so demanding. So it was women and children first. I know what you must think of me Sam. But I have to do this. I have to. You of all people should understand.
Sam Winchester: What's that supposed to mean?
Lucifer: I was a son. A brother, like you, a younger brother, and I had an older brother who I loved. Idolized, in fact. And one day I went to him, and I begged him to stand with me. And Michael... Michael turned on me. Called me a freak, a monster. And then he beat me down, all because I was different. Because I had a mind of my own. Tell me something Sam, any of this sound familiar? Anyway, you'll have to excuse me, midnight is calling, and I have a ritual to finish. Don't go anywhere. Not that you could if you would.
[turns away, chants, then turns to the sacrifices as Dean wakes up]
Lucifer: Now repeat after me. "We offer up our lives, blood, souls..."
Possessed townsfolk: We offer up our lives, blood, souls...
Lucifer: "... to complete this tribute."
Possessed townsfolk: To complete this tribute.
[one by one their heads light up and they fall, Sam and Dean stare in horror]
Lucifer: What? They're just demons.

Crowley: Mr. Pendleton, I presume? The name's Crowley.
Mr. Pendleton: [uncertain] In my negotiations I was, uh, dealing with a very young, attractive young lady...
Crowley: Yes, I know. But you, piggy-banker, you... are a big fish. And I wanted to do you the honor of sealing this deal personally.
Mr. Pendleton: She said the deal would be sealed with a kiss.
Crowley: [smiling] That's right.
Mr. Pendleton: No, I mean she's... I don't...
Crowley: Your choice. You can cling to six decades of deep-seated homophobia, or, just give it up, and get a complete bail-out of your bank's *ridiculous* incompetence.
Mr. Pendleton: There are just things that I...
Crowley: Going once...
Mr. Pendleton: No, I don't think so...
Crowley: Going twice...
Mr. Pendleton: [snarls] All right! All right.
[Crowley pulls him into a kiss, Pendleton squirms; Castiel comes into view behind a pillar]
Castiel: [into cell] Got him.

Castiel: The demon Crowley is making a deal. Even as we speak, it's... going... down.
Dean Winchester: "Going down?" Right. Okay, Huggy-Bear. Just don't lose him.
Castiel: I won't lose him.
Mr. Pendleton: [to Crowley] Damn you.
[walks away]
Crowley: Enjoy the obscene wealth! See you in ten years.
[He walks off, Castiel following; they vanish]
Castiel: [outside Crowley's hideout] I followed him. It's not far, but... it's layered in Enochian warding magic. I can't get in.
Dean Winchester: That's okay. You did great. We'll take it from here.

[Castiel is trapped in a ring of holy fire]
Castiel: Lucifer.
Lucifer: So I take it you're here with the Winchesters?
Castiel: I came alone.
Lucifer: Loyalty. Hm. Such a nice quality to see in this day and age. Castiel, right?
[Castiel nods]
Lucifer: Castiel, I'm told you came here in an automobile.
Castiel: Yes...
Lucifer: What was that like?
Castiel: Um... slow. Confining.
Lucifer: What a peculiar thing you are.
[Castiel notices lesions on Lucifer's face]
Castiel: What's wrong with your vessel?
Lucifer: Yes, um. Nick is wearing a bit thin, I'm afraid. He can't contain me forever, so...
Castiel: [angry] You...
[starts forward, remembers the holy fire]
Castiel: You are not taking Sam Winchester. I won't let you.

Lucifer: Castiel. I don't understand why you're fighting *me*, of all the angels.
Castiel: You really have to ask?
Lucifer: I rebelled, I was cast out, you rebelled, you were cast out. Almost all of Heaven wants to see me dead and if they succeed guess what? You're their new public enemy number one. We're on the same side, like it or not, so, why not just serve your own best interests which in this case just happen to be mine.
Castiel: I'll die first.
Lucifer: I suppose you will.

Castiel: You seem pleased.
Meg: We're gonna win! Can you feel it? You cloud-hopping pansies lost the whole damn universe! Lucifer's gonna take over Heaven! We're goin' to Heaven, Clarence!
Castiel: Strange. Because I heard a different theory from a demon named Crowley.
Meg: You don't know Crowley.
Castiel: He believes Lucifer is just using demons to achieve an end. And then, once he does, he'll destroy you all.
Meg: You're wrong. Lucifer is the father of our race. Our creator. Your God might be a dead-beat but mine, mine walks the Earth.
[the last bolt comes out, the pipe falls, knocking Meg into the circle with Castiel, Castiel tries to smite her but can't, Meg laughs]
Meg: You can't gank demons, can you? You're cut off from the home office and you ain't got the juice. So what *can* you do, you impotent sap?
Castiel: I can do this.

Castiel: [as he telekinetically loosens bolts on an overhead pipe] You seem pleased.
Meg: We're gonna win! Can you feel it? You cloud-hopping pansies lost the whole damn universe! Lucifer's gonna take over Heaven! We're goin' to Heaven, Clarence!
Castiel: Strange. Because I heard a different theory from a demon named Crowley.
Meg: [suspicious] You don't know Crowley.
Castiel: He believes Lucifer is just using demons to achieve an end. And then, once he does, he'll destroy you all.
Meg: [uncertain] You're wrong. Lucifer is the father of our race. Our creator. Your God might be a dead-beat but mine, mine walks the Earth.
[the last bolt comes out, the pipe falls, knocking Meg into the circle with Castiel, Castiel tries to smite her but can't, Meg laughs]
Meg: You can't gank demons, can you? You're cut off from the home office and you ain't got the juice. So what *can* you do, you impotent sap?
Castiel: I can do this.
[he flings her down on the flames, uses her body as a bridge to escape]

Castiel: [after downing five shots] I Think I'm starting to feel something.

Lucifer: Oh hellooooo Death.

"Supernatural: Free to Be You and Me (#5.3)" (2009)
Lindsey: [to Sam, about darts] Hey Keith, do you play?
Sam Winchester: That depends. What are we playing for?
Lindsey: World peace.
Sam Winchester: Oh, is that all?
Lindsey: Can I ask you something?
Sam Winchester: Shoot.
Lindsey: You finished that uh, crossword puzzle in the kitchen?
Sam Winchester: Uh... I guess. Why?
Lindsey: The New York Times *Saturday* crossword.
Sam Winchester: Was it?
Lindsey: Uh-huh. You blow into town last week, you don't talk to anybody, you're obviously highly educated, you're like this...
Sam Winchester: Riddle wrapped inside an enigma wrapped inside a taco?
Lindsey: [holding up a dart] Here's what we play for. When I win, you buy me dinner and tell me your life story.
Sam Winchester: Sounds fair.
[Sam takes the darts and hits the bullseye with all three]
Lindsey: [surprised] Very mysterioso. I like it.
[Sam gets distracted by a news broadcast]
TV Reporter: Locals say what started as a torrential hailstorm late this afternoon suddenly turned to massive lightning strikes that triggered the fire now consuming more than twenty acres here along the Route 17 corridor...
[bartender flips the TV off]
Bartender: Damn. Is it me, or does it seem like the end of the world?

Dean Winchester: So, find God yet? More importantly, can I have my damn necklace back, please?
Castiel: No, I haven't found him. That's why I'm here. I need your help.
Dean Winchester: With what? A god hunt? I'm not interested.
Castiel: It's not God. Someone else.
Dean Winchester: Who?
Castiel: It's an archangel. The one who killed me.
Dean Winchester: Excuse me?
Castiel: His name is Raphael.
Dean Winchester: You were wasted by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Angel?

Dean Winchester: We're here why?
Castiel: A deputy sheriff laid eyes on the archangel.
Dean Winchester: And he still has eyes? All right, what's the plan?
Castiel: [shrugs] We'll... tell the officer that he witnessed an Angel of the Lord, and the officer will tell us where the angel is.
Dean Winchester: You're serious? You're gonna walk in there and tell him the truth?
Castiel: [confused] Why not?
[Dean slips an FBI badge into Castiel's inside pocket, fusses with his shirt and tie]
Dean Winchester: Because... we're humans. And when humans want something, really really bad... we lie.
Castiel: [puzzled] Why?
Dean Winchester: Because... that's how you become president.

Dean Winchester: [about finding Raphael] You're serious about this. So what, I'm Thelma and you're Louise and we're just gonna hold hands and drive off this cliff together?
[pause while Castiel looks at him]
Dean Winchester: Look, gimme one good reason why I should do this.
Castiel: Because you're Michael's vessel, and no angel will dare harm you.
Dean Winchester: Oh, so I'm your bullet shield!
Castiel: I need your help, because you are the *only* one who'll help me. Please.
[Castiel looks at him pleadingly]
Dean Winchester: All right fine. Where is he?
Castiel: Maine. Let's go.
[reaches two fingers toward Dean's forehead]
Dean Winchester: [flinching back] Whoa whoa!
Castiel: What?
Dean Winchester: Last time you zapped me someplace, I didn't poop for a week! We're driving.

Dean Winchester: [after the courtesan has run off angrily] What the hell did you do?
Castiel: I don't know. I just looked at her in the eyes and told her it wasn't her fault that her father Gene ran off. It was because he hated his job at the post office.
Dean Winchester: [slightly amused] Oh no, *man*.
Castiel: What?
Dean Winchester: This whole industry runs on absent fathers, it's, it's the natural order.
[bouncers appear at the end of the hall]
Dean Winchester: [grabbing Cas] We should go. C'mon.
[they run outside, Dean doubles over, laughing]
Castiel: What's so funny?
[Dean puts an arm around Castiel's shoulders, Cas smiles]
Dean Winchester: Oh, nothing. Whew. It's been a long time since I've laughed that hard. Oh. It's been more than a long time. Years.

Castiel: [pouring oil around Raphael's empty vessel] When the oil burns, no angel can touch or pass through the flames, or he dies.
Dean Winchester: Okay, so we trap him in a steel cage of holy fire, but, uh, one question: how the hell do we get him here?
Castiel: There's... well, almost an open phone line between a vessel and his angel. One just has to know how to dial.
[leans over and mutters some strange words in the vessel's ear]
Castiel: I'm here, Raphael. Come and get me, you little bastard.

Castiel: [entering the abandoned house after summoning Raphael] Dean, wait.
[He steps in front of Dean; Raphael appears with wings of lightning, the lights explode]
Raphael: Castiel.
Castiel: Raphael.
Dean Winchester: Oh, you know, I thought you were supposed to be impressive. All you do is black out the room?
Raphael: And the eastern seaboard.
[to Castiel]
Raphael: It is a testament to my unending mercy that I do not smite you here and now.
Dean Winchester: Or maybe you're full of crap. Maybe you're afraid that God'll bring Cas back to life again, and smite *you*, you candy-ass skirt. By the way, hi, I'm Dean.
Raphael: I know who you are. And now thanks to him, I know *where* you are.
Castiel: You won't kill him. You wouldn't dare.
Raphael: But I will take him to Michael.
Dean Winchester: [going to get a beer from the cooler] Well that sounds terrifying. It does. But, uh, I hate to tell ya, I'm not goin' anywhere with you.
[turns his back and takes a sip]
Raphael: Surely you remember Zachariah giving you stomach cancer?
[a slight nervousness crosses Dean's face, but he turns back to Raphael, all swagger]
Dean Winchester: Yeah, that was, that was hilarious.
Raphael: Yes, well, he doesn't have anything close to my *imagination*.
Dean Winchester: Oh yeah?
[Raphael advances on him, Dean glances at the floor, then at Cas]
Dean Winchester: I'll bet you didn't imagine one thing.
Raphael: [threatening] What?
Dean Winchester: We knew you were coming, you stupid sonofabitch.
[he flicks his lighter and drops it on the circle of oil Raphael just walked into; flame surrounds the archangel; Raphael glares at Dean]
Dean Winchester: Don't look at me, it was his idea!
[Castiel gives him a look]
Castiel: [to Raphael] Where is he?
Raphael: God.
[Cas nods]
Raphael: Didn't you hear? He's dead, Castiel. Dead.

Raphael: But there's no other explanation. He's gone for good.
Castiel: You're lying.
Raphael: Am I? Do you *remember* the twentieth century? Think the twenty-first is going any better? Do you think God would have let any of that happen, if he were alive?
Dean Winchester: Oh yeah, well then who invented the Chinese basket trick?
Raphael: Careful. That's my Father you're talking about, boy.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, who would be *so proud* to know that his sons started the friggin' Apocalypse!
Raphael: Who ran off and disappeared! Who left no instructions, and a world to rot.
Dean Winchester: So Daddy ran away and disappeared. He didn't happen to work for the Post Office, did he?
[Cas stares at him]
Raphael: This is funny to you? You're living in a Godless universe!
Dean Winchester: [angrily] And? What, you and the other kids just decided to throw an Apocalypse while he's gone?
Raphael: [wearily] We're tired. We just want it to be over. We just want... paradise.
Dean Winchester: So what, God dies and makes you the boss, and you think you can do whatever you want?
Raphael: [angry] Yes! And whatever we want, we get!
[the windows explode; Dean and Cas duck]

Dean Winchester: Hey, you okay?
[pause, Cas stares straight ahead, not answering]
Dean Winchester: Look, I'll be the first to tell you that this little crusade of yours is nuts, but, I do know a little something about missing fathers.
Castiel: What do you mean?
Dean Winchester: I mean, there were times when I was looking for my Dad when... all logic said that he was dead. But I knew, in my heart, that he was still alive. So who cares what some Ninja Turtle says, Cas, what do *you* believe?
Castiel: I believe he's out there.
Dean Winchester: Good. Then go find him.
Castiel: [looking at Dean] What about you?
Dean Winchester: What about me? I don't know. Honestly? I'm good. I can't believe I'm saying that, but, I am, I'm, I'm really good.
Castiel: Even without your brother.
Dean Winchester: [bitterly] Especially without my brother.
[Castiel looks at him]
Dean Winchester: I mean I spent so much time worrying about the sonofabitch... I mean, I've had more fun with you in the past twenty-four hours than I've had with Sam in years. And you're not that much fun. Funny, you know, I've been so chained by my family, but now that I'm alone... hell, I'm happy.
[smiles, looks over; Castiel is gone]

[Castiel appears behind Dean; Dean sees him in the mirror and jumps]
Dean Winchester: God! Don't do that!
Castiel: Hello Dean.
[Dean turns around; Castiel stares at him from only inches away]
Dean Winchester: Cas, we've talked about this. Personal space?
Castiel: My apologies.
[he backs away]

Dean Winchester: Tell me something, you keep saying we're gonna trap this guy, but isn't that kinda like trapping a hurricane with a butterfly net?
Castiel: No, it's harder.
Dean Winchester: Do we have any chance of surviving this?
Castiel: You do.
Dean Winchester: So, odds are you're a dead man tomorrow.
Castiel: Yes.
Dean Winchester: Wow. Well, last night on earth. What, uh, what are your plans?
Castiel: I just thought I'd sit here quietly.
Dean Winchester: Dude, come on. Anything? Hm? Booze? Women?
[Castiel glances at him, then looks away uncomfortably]
Dean Winchester: You have been with a women before? Right? Or an angel, at least?
[Castiel rubs his neck, embarrassed]
Dean Winchester: You mean to tell me you've never been up there doing a little cloud seeding?
Castiel: Look, I've never had occasion, okay?
Dean Winchester: All right. Lemme tell you something. There are two things that I know for certain, one: Bert and Ernie are gay. Two: you are *not* gonna die a virgin. Not on my watch. Let's go.
[Dean grabs his jacket and heads out, Castiel looks around uncertain, gets up and follows]

Castiel: [above the sound of the storm] If God is dead, why have I returned? Who brought me back?
Raphael: Did it ever occur to you that maybe, Lucifer raised you?
Castiel: No.
Raphael: Think about it. He needs all the rebellious angels he can find.
[pause, Dean looks at Cas]
Raphael: You know it adds up.
Castiel: [to Dean] Let's go.
[he turns, starts walking away]
Raphael: Castiel!
[Cas turns back]
Raphael: I'm warning you. Do not leave me here. I *will* find you.
Castiel: Maybe one day. But today you're *my* little bitch.
[he exits]
Dean Winchester: [following Cas] What he said!

[Dean and Cas are in a brothel; Castiel looks very, very nervous]
Dean Winchester: Hey, *relax*.
Castiel: This is a den of iniquity. I should not be here.
Dean Winchester: Dude, you full-on rebelled against Heaven. Iniquity is one of the perks!
[a courtesan comes over]
Dean Winchester: Showtime.
Courtesan: [to Cas] Hi. What's your name?
[Castiel hesitates, looking more and more nervous]
Dean Winchester: Cas!
[Castiel jumps]
Dean Winchester: His name's Cas. What's your name?
Courtesan: Chastity.
Dean Winchester: Chastity.
Courtesan: Mm-hm.
Dean Winchester: Wow.
[to Cas, grinning]
Dean Winchester: Is that kismet or what, buddy?
[Castiel takes a long pull of beer]
Dean Winchester: Well, he like you and you like him, so...
Courtesan: [taking Castiel's hand] C'mon baby.
Dean Winchester: [grabbing Castiel's elbow] Oh hey, listen.
[taking out a wad of bills]
Dean Winchester: Take this. If she asks for a credit card, no. Now just stick to the basics, okay? Do not order off the menu. Go get her, Tiger.
[Cas looks helplessly panicked]
Dean Winchester: Don't make me push you.
[Cas takes the money, follows the courtesan]

Dean Winchester: Where have you been?
Castiel: Jerusalem.
Dean Winchester: Oh! How was it?
Castiel: Arid.

Dean Winchester: [Looking at Donnie Finnerman through the window of his hospital room] I take it that's not Raphael any more.
Castiel: Just an empty vessel.
Dean Winchester: So, is this what I'm looking at if Michael jumps my bones?
Castiel: No, not at all. Michael is much more powerful. It'll be far worse for you.
[Dean closes his eyes and turns his head away]

"Supernatural: Something Wicked (#1.18)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: [as they prepare to leave] It's too bad.
Dean Winchester: Nah, they'll be fine.
Sam Winchester: That's not what I meant. I meant Michael. He'll always know there are things out there in the dark, never be the same, you know? Sometimes I wish that...
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: I wish I could have that kind of innocence.
Dean Winchester: If it means anything, sometimes I wish you could, too.

Sam Winchester: Should've thought of this before. A doctor's the perfect disguise, you're trusted, you can control the whole thing!
Dean Winchester: That sonofabitch.
Sam Winchester: I'm surprised you didn't draw on him right there.
Dean Winchester: Yeah well, first of all, I'm not gonna open fire in a friggin' pediatrics ward.
Sam Winchester: Good call.
Dean Winchester: Second, it wouldn't 'a done any good, 'cause the bastard's bullet-proof unless he's chowin' down on somethin'. And third... I wasn't packin', which is probably a really good thing 'cause I probably would've just burned a clip in him off of principle alone.
Sam Winchester: Gettin' wise in your old age, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Damn right.

[after learning that Shtrigas usually disguise themselves as old women]
Dean Winchester: [getting a map] Check this out. I marked down all the addresses of the victims. Now these are the houses that have been hit so far. And dead center?
Sam Winchester: The hospital.
Dean Winchester: The hospital. When we were there I saw a patient, an old woman.
Sam Winchester: An old person, huh?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: [chuckling] In the hospital? Hoo, better call the Coast Guard.

Sam Winchester: Dude, dude, I am not using this ID!
Dean Winchester: Why not?
Sam Winchester: Because it says "Bikini Inspector" on it!

Sam Winchester: What makes you so sure?
Dean Winchester: Well, because I'm the oldest, which means I'm always right.
Sam Winchester: No, it doesn't.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, it totally does.

Sam Winchester: Dean you got the time?
Dean Winchester: [checking his watch] Ten after four.
[Sam nods]
Dean Winchester: Why?
Sam Winchester: What's wrong with this picture?
[Dean follows Sam's gaze to a nearly empty playground]
Dean Winchester: School's out, isn't it?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. So where is everybody? This place should be crawlin' with kids right now.

Sam Winchester: So what the hell is a Shtriga?
Dean Winchester: It's... kinda like a witch I think. I don't know much about 'em.
Sam Winchester: Well I've never heard of it. And it's not in Dad's journal.
Dean Winchester: Dad hunted one in Fort Douglas Wisconsin about sixteen-seventeen years ago. You were there, you don't remember?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: I guess he caught wind that the thing's in Fitchburg now and kicked us the coordinates.
Sam Winchester: So wait, this...
Dean Winchester: Shtriga.
Sam Winchester: Right. You think it's the same one Dad hunted before.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, maybe.
Sam Winchester: But if Dad went after it, why is it still breathing air?
Dean Winchester: 'Cause it got away.
Sam Winchester: Got away.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, Sammy, it happens.
Sam Winchester: Not very often.
Dean Winchester: Well I dunno what to tell ya, I mean maybe Dad didn't have his Wheaties that mornin'.
Sam Winchester: What else do you remember?
Dean Winchester: [evasive] Nothin', I was a kid, all right?

Sam Winchester: Well, you were right. It wasn't very easy to find, but you were right. A Shtriga *is* a kind of witch. They're Albanian, but legends about 'em date back to ancient Rome. They feed off of spiritus vitae.
Dean Winchester: Spir what?
Sam Winchester: Vitae. It's Latin, it translates to "Breath of Life." Kinda like your life force or essence.

Sam Winchester: Anyway, Shtrigas can feed off anyone, but they prefer...
Dean Winchester: Children.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, probably 'cause they have stronger life force. And get this: "Shtrigas are invulnerable to all weapons devised by God and Man."
Dean Winchester: No. That's not right. She's vulnerable when she feeds.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: You catch her when she's eating, you can blast her with consecrated wrought-irons, uh, buck-shots or rounds I think.
Sam Winchester: How do you know that?
Dean Winchester: Dad told me. I remember.
[Sam gives Dean a look]
Sam Winchester: Oh. Huh. So uh, anything else Dad might've mentioned?
Dean Winchester: [evasive] No, that's it.

Michael: I'm going with you.
Joanna: Not now, Michael.
Michael: But I gotta see Asher!
Dean Winchester: Hey Michael. Hey. I know how you feel, I'm a big brother too, but you gotta go easy on your Mom right now, okay?
[Michael nods]
Joanna: [dropping her purse] Dammit!
Sam Winchester: I got it. Here.
Joanna: Thanks.
Dean Winchester: Hey listen, you're in no condition to drive. Why don't you let me give you a lift to the hospital, huh?
Joanna: No, I couldn't possibly...
Dean Winchester: It's no trouble. I insist.
Joanna: [handing him the keys] Thanks.
[to Michael]
Joanna: Be good.
[she gets in the car]
Dean Winchester: [fiercely, to Sam] I'm gonna kill this thing. I want it dead, you hear me?

Dean Winchester: What do you got?
Sam Winchester: Well, bad news. I started with uh, with Fort Douglas, around the time you said Dad was there?
Dean Winchester: And?
Sam Winchester: [scrolling through news articles] Same deal. Before that, there was uh, there was Ogdenville, before that, North Haverbrook, and Brockway... Every fifteen to twenty years, it hits a new town. Dean, this thing is just gettin' started in Fitchburg. In all these other places, it goes on for months, dozens of kids, before the Shtriga finally moves on. Kids just, languish in comas and then they die.
Dean Winchester: How far back's this thing go?
Sam Winchester: Uh, I dunno. Earliest mention I could find is this place called Black River Falls back in the 1890s. Talk about a horror show.
[he scrolls up a photo]
Sam Winchester: Whoa.
Dean Winchester: Sam?
Sam Winchester: Hold on. I'm lookin' at a photograph right now, of a bunch of doctors standing around a kid's bed. One of the doctors... is Hydecker.
Dean Winchester: And?
Sam Winchester: And, this picture was taken in 1893.

Sam Winchester: Then you wanna use the kid as *bait*? Are you nuts? No! Forget it, that's outta the question!
Dean Winchester: It's not outta the question Sam, it's the only way. If this thing disappears, it could be years before we get another chance!
Sam Winchester: Michael's a *kid*! And I'm not gonna dangle him in front of that thing like a worm on a hook!
Dean Winchester: Dad did not send me here to walk away!
Sam Winchester: Send *you* here? He didn't send you here, he sent *us* here!
Dean Winchester: This isn't about you Sam! All right, I'm the one that screwed up! It's *my* fault, there's no telling how many kids have gotten hurt because of me.

Sam Winchester: What're you saying, Dean? How is it your fault? Dean. You've been hiding something from the get-go. Since when does Dad bail on a hunt? Since when does he let something get away? Now talk to me, man! Tell me what's goin' on.
Dean Winchester: Fort Douglas Wisconsin. It was, it was the third night in this crap room and I was climbin' the walls, man, I needed to get some air.
[flashback shows young Dean slipping out; when he gets back, the Shtriga is in the room hanging over Sam; Dean grabs the rifle and cocks it, the Shrtiga looks up and roars; John comes in]
John Winchester: Get outta the way!
[Dean ducks, John fires at the Shtriga, the Shtriga jumps through the window and escapes; John grabs Sam]
John Winchester: Sammy, Sammy, Sammy! You okay?
Young Sam: Dad, what's going on?
John Winchester: You all right?
[he hugs him tight, turns to Dean]
John Winchester: What happened?
Young Dean: I, I just went out.
John Winchester: [dangerous] What?
Young Dean: J-just for a second. I'm sorry.
John Winchester: [angry] I told you not to leave this room! I told you not to let him out of your sight!
[cut back to present]
Dean Winchester: Dad just... grabbed us and booked. Dropped us off at Pastor Jim's about three hours away; by the time he got back to Fort Douglas the Shtriga disappeared, it was, was just gone. Never resurfaced until now. You know, Dad never... spoke about it again. I didn't ask. But he uh, he looked at me different. You know? Which was worse. Not that I blame him. He gave me an order and I didn't listen, I almost got you killed.
Sam Winchester: You were just a kid.
Dean Winchester: Don't. Don't. Dad knew this was unfinished business for me. He sent me here to finish it.

Sam Winchester: You sure these iron rounds are gonna work?
Dean Winchester: Consecrated iron rounds, and yeah, it's what Dad used last time.
Sam Winchester: Hey Dean, I'm sorry.
Dean Winchester: For what?
Sam Winchester: You know. I've really given you a lot of crap. For always following Dad's orders. But I know why you do it.
Dean Winchester: Oh God, kill me now.

"Supernatural: Home (#1.9)" (2005)
[Dean reads stories from the news, Sam is sketching a tree in a notepad]
Dean Winchester: All right, I been cruisin' some websites, think I found a few candidates for our next gig. A fishing trawler found off the coast of Cali, its crew vanished. And uh, got some cattle mutilations in west Texas...
[notices that Sam doesn't seem to be listening]
Dean Winchester: Hey! Am I boring you with this "hunting evil" stuff?
Sam Winchester: No, I'm listening. Keep goin'.
Dean Winchester: And here, a Sacramento man shot himself in the head... three times.
[holds up three fingers, starts waving at Sam]
Dean Winchester: Any of these things blowing up your skirt pal?

Sam Winchester: I know where we have to go next.
Dean Winchester: Where?
Sam Winchester: Back home, back to Kansas.
Dean Winchester: OK random, where'd that come from?

[they pull up outside their old house]
Sam Winchester: You gonna be all right, man?
Dean Winchester: Let me get back to you on that.

Dean Winchester: Trust you? C'mon man, that's weak, you gotta give me a little bit more than that.
Sam Winchester: I can't... really explain it, is all.
Dean Winchester: Well tough! I'm not goin' anywhere until you do!
Sam Winchester: I have these nightmares.
Dean Winchester: [nods] I've noticed...
Sam Winchester: And sometimes... they come true.
[a beat]
Dean Winchester: Come again?

Sam Winchester: Look Dean... I dreamt about Jessica's death. For days before it happened.
Dean Winchester: Sam, people have weird dreams, man. I'm sure it's just a coincidence.
Sam Winchester: [increasingly agitated] No, I dreamt about the blood dripping, her on the ceiling, the fire, everything, and I didn't do anything about it because I didn't believe it, and now I'm dreaming about that tree, about our house and about some woman inside screaming for help, I mean, that's where it all started, man! This has to mean something, right?
Dean Winchester: [freaked] I don't know.
Sam Winchester: You don't... what do you mean you don't know, Dean? This, this woman might be in danger! I mean this might even be the thing that killed Mom and Jessica!
Dean Winchester: All right, just slow down, would ya? I mean, first you tell me you've got 'The Shining' and then you tell me that I've got to go back home? Especially when...
Sam Winchester: When what?
Dean Winchester: When I swore to myself that I would never go back there?
Sam Winchester: Look. Dean, we have to check this out. Just to make sure.
[pause, Dean nods]
Dean Winchester: I know we do.

Sairie: Mom? Ask them if it was here when they lived here.
[pause, Jenny looks at the brothers]
Sam Winchester: What, Sairie?
Sairie: The thing in my closet.
Jenny: Oh no, baby, there's nothing in their closets.
[to Sam and Dean]
Jenny: Right?
Sam Winchester: Right. No. No, of course not.
Jenny: She had a nightmare the other night.
Sairie: I wasn't dreaming! It came into my bedroom. And it was on fire!
[cut to Dean and Sam walking out of the house]
Sam Winchester: [agitated] You hear that? A figure on fire!
Dean Winchester: And that woman, Jenny, that was the woman in your dreams?
Sam Winchester: Yeah! And you hear what she was talking about? Scratching, flickering lights, both signs of a malevolent spirit!
Dean Winchester: Yeah well, I'm just freaked out that your weirdo visions are comin' true.

Missouri Moseley: Well, let me look at you. Haha, ooh, you boys grew up handsome.
[laughs, looks at Dean]
Missouri Moseley: And you were one goofy-lookin' kid, too.
[Sam grins widely, amused]
Missouri Moseley: Sam.
[she takes Sam's hand, her tone turns sympathetic]
Missouri Moseley: Oh, honey. I'm sorry about your girlfriend. And your father. He's missin'?
Sam Winchester: How'd you know all that?
Missouri Moseley: Well, you were just thinkin' it, just now.
Dean Winchester: Well, where is he, is he okay?
Missouri Moseley: I don't know.
Dean Winchester: Don't know? You're supposed to be a psychic, right?
Missouri Moseley: [irritated] Boy, you see me sawin' some bony tramp in half? You think I'm a magician? I may be able to read thoughts and sense energies in a room but I can't just pull facts outta thin air!

[Sam is being held against the wall by the poltergeist; Dean raises his gun to shoot the approaching fiery figure]
Sam Winchester: No don't! Don't!
Dean Winchester: What, why?
Sam Winchester: Because I know who it is. I can see her now.
[their mother materializes out of the flames; Dean lowers his gun]
Dean Winchester: Mom.
Mary Winchester: [smiling] Dean.
[she walks over to Sam]
Mary Winchester: Sam. I'm sorry.
Sam Winchester: [bewildered] F-for what?
[she looks at him sadly, then turns and addresses the poltergeist]
Mary Winchester: You get out of my house. And let go of my son!
[she goes up in flames and disappears; Sam is released]

[after learning that John used to go to a palm reader]
Sam Winchester: [looking in a phone book] All right, so there are a few psychics and palm readers in town, there's uh, there's someone named El Divino, there's...
Sam Winchester: There's "the Mysterious Mister Fortinski." Uh, Missouri Moseley...
Dean Winchester: Wait wait. Missouri Moseley?
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: That's a psychic?
Sam Winchester: [checking the book] Uh... yeah, yeah I guess so.
[Dean gets the journal out of the car]
Dean Winchester: Dad's journal. Here, look at this. First page, first sentence, read that.
Sam Winchester: [reads] "I went to Missouri, and I learned the truth."
Dean Winchester: [shrugs] I always thought he meant the state.

Sam Winchester: Okay, so, our Dad. When did you first meet him?
Missouri Moseley: He came for a reading. A few days after the fire. I just told him what was really out there in the dark. I guess you could say, I drew back the curtains for him.
Dean Winchester: What about the fire? Do you... do you know about what killed our Mom?
Missouri Moseley: A little. Your Daddy took me to your house. He was hopin' I could sense the echoes, the fingerprints of this thing.
Sam Winchester: And could you?
Missouri Moseley: A little.
Sam Winchester: What was it?
Missouri Moseley: [softly] I don't know. Oh. But it was evil.

Missouri Moseley: So. You think somethin's back in that house.
Sam Winchester: Definitely.
Missouri Moseley: I... I don't understand.
Sam Winchester: What?
Missouri Moseley: I haven't been back inside, but, I been keepin' an eye on the place and, it's been quiet. No sudden deaths, no freak accidents. Why is it actin' up now?
Sam Winchester: I don't know. But Dad going missing and Jessica dying, and, now this house, all happening at once, it just feels like something's starting.
Dean Winchester: Well that's a comforting thought.

[as the poltergeist is attacking]
Sam Winchester: Sairie, take your brother outside as fast as you can, don't look back!

Missouri Moseley: Well, there's no spirits in there anymore, this time for sure.
Sam Winchester: Not even my Mom?
Missouri Moseley: No.
Sam Winchester: What happened?
Missouri Moseley: Your Mom's spirit and the poltergeist's energy, they canceled each other out. Your Mom destroyed herself goin' after the thing.
Sam Winchester: Why would she do somethin' like that?
Missouri Moseley: Well to protect her boys, of course.
Missouri Moseley: Sam I'm sorry.
Sam Winchester: For what?
Missouri Moseley: You sensed it was here, didn't you? Even when I couldn't.
Sam Winchester: What's happening to me?
Missouri Moseley: I know I should have all the answers, but... I don't know.

Sam Winchester: [sketching a tree from his dream] Wait, I've seen this.
Dean Winchester: Seen what?
[Sam gets up, fishes John's journal out of a bag]
Dean Winchester: What're you doin'?
[Sam finds a family photo and compares it to his sketch]
Sam Winchester: Dean, I know where we have to go next.
Dean Winchester: Where?
Sam Winchester: Back home. Back to Kansas.
Dean Winchester: Okay, random. Where'd that come from?
Sam Winchester: All right, um.
[hands Dean the picture]
Sam Winchester: This photo was taken in front of our old house, right? The house where Mom died?
Dean Winchester: Yeah...
Sam Winchester: And it didn't burn down, right? I mean not completely, they rebuilt it, right?
Dean Winchester: I guess so, yeah. What the hell are you talkin' about?
Sam Winchester: Okay, look. This is gonna sound crazy, but, the people who live in our old house, I think they might be in danger.
Dean Winchester: Why would you think that?
Sam Winchester: [uncomfortable] Uh. I just, um. Look, just, you gotta trust me on this, okay?

"Supernatural: Nightmare (#1.14)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: Well, I know one thing I have in common with these people.
Dean Winchester: What's that?
Sam Winchester: Both our families are cursed.
Dean Winchester: Our family's not cursed! We just... had our dark spots.
Sam Winchester: [laughing] Our dark spots are *pretty* dark.
Dean Winchester: You're... dark.

Alice Miller: It was wonderful of you to stop by. The support of the church means so much right now.
Dean Winchester: Of course, after all, we are all God's children.
[Alice walks off, Dean crams an hors d'oeuvre in his mouth; Sam makes an exasperated sound]
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: Just, tone it down a little bit? "Father"?

Dean Winchester: C'mon, let's just pick this up in the morning, all right? Check out the house, we'll talk to the family...
Sam Winchester: Dean, you saw them, they're devastated. They're not gonna want to talk to us.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, you're right. But I think I know who they will talk to.
Sam Winchester: Who?
[cut to them ringing the doorbell, dressed as priests]
Sam Winchester: This has got to be a whole new low for us.

Dean Winchester: Maybe the guy just killed himself. You know, maybe there's nothing supernatural going on at all.
Sam Winchester: I'm telling you, I watched it happen. He was *murdered* by something, Dean. It trapped him in the garage.
Dean Winchester: Like what, a spirit, a poltergeist, what?
Sam Winchester: I don't know what it was. I don't know why I'm having these dreams, I don't know what the hell is happening, Dean!
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Nothing, man, I'm just, I'm worried about you.
Sam Winchester: Well don't look at me like that!
Dean Winchester: I'm not looking at you like anything. Though I gotta say, you look like crap.
Dean Winchester: Nice. Thanks.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, well.

Sam Winchester: [last lines] Aren't you worried, man, aren't you worried that I could turn into Max or something?
Dean Winchester: Nope. No way. You know why?
Sam Winchester: No. Why?
Dean Winchester: Cause you got one advantage that Max didn't have.
Sam Winchester: Dad? Because Dad's not here, Dean.
Dean Winchester: No. Me.
[He smiles]
Dean Winchester: As long as I'm around, nothing bad is gonna happen to you. Now then, I know what we need to do about your premonitions. I know where we have to go.
Sam Winchester: Where?
Dean Winchester: Vegas.
[He smiles. Sam scoffs]
Dean Winchester: What? Come on, man. Craps table? We'd clean up.

Sam Winchester: Dean I'm scared, man. These nightmares weren't bad enough, now I'm seeing things when I'm awake? And these... visions, or whatever, they're getting more intense. And painful.
Dean Winchester: C'mon man, it'll be all right. You'll be fine.
Sam Winchester: What is it about the Millers? Why am I connected to them? Why am I watching them *die*? Why the hell is this happening to me?
Dean Winchester: I don't know Sam, but we'll figure it out, okay? We face the unexplainable every single day, this is just another thing.
Sam Winchester: No. It's never been *us*. It's never been in the family like this! Tell me the truth, you can't tell me this doesn't freak you out.
Dean Winchester: [unconvincing] This doesn't freak me out.

Sam Winchester: We were just wondering if you might recall a family, they used to live right across the street.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, the Millers, they had a little boy named Max.
Sam Winchester: Right.
Neighbor Man: Yeah, I remember. The brother had the place next door. So uh, what's this about? That poor kid okay?
Sam Winchester: What do you mean?
Neighbor Man: Well in my life I've never seen a child treated like that. I mean I'd hear Mr. Miller yellin' and throwin' things clear across the street, he was, he was a mean drunk. He used to beat the tar outta Max. Bruises. Broke his arm two times that I know of.
Sam Winchester: And this was going on regularly?
Neighbor Man: Practically every day. In fact, that thug brother of his was just as likely to take a swing at the boy, but the worst part, was the stepmother. She'd just... stand there, checked out, never lifted a finger to protect him. I must've called the police seven or eight times, never did any good.
Dean Winchester: Now you said stepmother.
Neighbor Man: I think his real mom died, some sort of accident, car accident, I think.

Sam Winchester: Max is doing it. Everything I've been seeing.
Dean Winchester: You sure about this?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I saw him.
Dean Winchester: How's he pullin' it off?
Dean Winchester: I dunno, looked like telekinesis?
Sam Winchester: So he's psychic, you mean he's a, a spoon-bender?
Sam Winchester: I didn't even realize it, but this whole time he was there, he was outside of the garage when his Dad died, he was in the apartment when his uncle died... These visions, this whole time, I wasn't connecting to the Millers, I was connecting to Max. The thing I don't get is why, man? I guess... because we're so alike?
Dean Winchester: What're you talking about? Dude's nothing like you.
Sam Winchester: Well, we both have psychic abilities, we're both...
Dean Winchester: Both what? Sam, Max is a monster, he's already killed two people and now he's gunning for a third!
Sam Winchester: Well with what he went through, the beatings, to want revenge on those people, I'm sorry man, I hate to say it but it's not that insane.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, but it doesn't justify murdering your entire family.
Sam Winchester: Dean...
Dean Winchester: He's no different than anything else we've hunted! All right? We gotta end him.

Sam Winchester: We're not gonna kill Max.
Dean Winchester: Then what? I hand him over to the cops and say "lock him up officer, he kills with the power of his mind!"
Sam Winchester: Forget it! No way man.
Dean Winchester: Sam...
Sam Winchester: Dean! He's a *person*. We can talk to him! Hey, promise me you'll follow my lead on this one.
Dean Winchester: All right fine. But I'm not lettin' him hurt anybody else.
[he pulls a gun from the glove compartment]

Sam Winchester: Look, what they did to you, what they all did to you, growin' up, they deserve to be punished, but...
Max Miller: Growing up? Try last week.
[he lifts his shirt, showing ugly bruises and cuts]
Max Miller: My Dad still hit me. Just in places people wouldn't see it. Old habits die hard, I guess.
Sam Winchester: I'm sorry.
Max Miller: When I first found out I could move things, it was a gift. My whole life, I was helpless. But now I had this. So last week, Dad gets drunk. First time in a long time. And he beats me to hell. First time in a long time. And then I knew what I had to do.
Sam Winchester: Why didn't you just leave?
Max Miller: It wasn't about getting away. Just knowing that they'd still be out there... It was about not being afraid. When my Dad used to look at me? There was hate in his eyes. Do you know what that feels like?
Sam Winchester: [quietly] No.
Max Miller: He blamed me for everything. For his job. For his life. For my Mom's death.
Sam Winchester: Why would he blame you for your Mom's death?
Max Miller: Because she died in my nursery. While I was asleep in my crib. As if that makes it my fault!
Sam Winchester: She died in your nursery?
Max Miller: Yeah. There was a fire. And he'd get drunk, and babble on like she died in some insane way. He said that she burned up. Pinned to the ceiling!

Sam Winchester: Listen to me Max. What your Dad said, about what happened to your Mom... It's real.
Max Miller: What?
Sam Winchester: It happened to my Mom too. Exactly the same. My nursery, my crib, my Dad saw her on the ceiling...
Max Miller: Then your Dad must've been as drunk as mine.
Sam Winchester: No. No, it's the same thing, Max! The same thing killed our mothers!
Max Miller: It's impossible!
Sam Winchester: This must be why I've been having visions curing the day. Why they're getting more intense. 'Cause you and I must be connected in some way. Your abilities, they started six, seven months ago, right? Out of the blue?
Max Miller: How'd you know that?
Sam Winchester: Because that's when my abilities started, Max! I mean yours seem to be much further along, but still this, this means something! Right? I mean for some reason, you and I, you and I were chosen.
Max Miller: For what?
Sam Winchester: I don't know. But Dean and I, my brother and I, we're hunting for your Mom's killer. And we could find answers. Answers that could help us both. But you gotta let us go, Max. You gotta let your stepmother go.
Max Miller: No. What they did to me. I still have nightmares. I'm still scared all the time, like, like I'm just waiting for that next beating!
[getting up and starting for the stairs]
Max Miller: I'm just tired of being scared! If I do this, it'll be over!
[Sam follows and blocks him]
Sam Winchester: No, don't you get it? It won't. The nightmares won't end, Max. Not like this. It's just... more pain. And it makes you as bad as them. Max, you don't have to go through all this by yourself.
Max Miller: I'm sorry.
[Max telekinetically opens a closet and traps Sam inside]

[Max is threatening Alice with the gun]
Alice Miller: Max, no.
[Dean moves to protect Alice]
Max Miller: [to Dean] Stay back. It's not about you.
Dean Winchester: You're gonna kill her, you gotta go through me first.
Max Miller: Okay.
[he cocks the gun; Sam bursts in]
Sam Winchester: No don't! Don't! Please! Please, Max. Max, we can help you. All right? But this, what you're doing, it's not the solution. It's not gonna fix anything.
Max Miller: [quietly] You're right.
[He swings the gun around and shoots himself in the head]
Sam Winchester: No!

Sam Winchester: If I'd just said something else. Gotten through to him somehow.
Dean Winchester: Don't do that.
Sam Winchester: Do what?
Dean Winchester: Torture yourself. It wouldn't have mattered what you said, Max was too far gone.
Sam Winchester: When I think about how he looked at me man, right before... I should've done something.
Dean Winchester: C'mon man, you risked your life! I mean yeah, maybe if we'd gotten there twenty years earlier.
Sam Winchester: Well, I'll tell you one thing. We're lucky we had Dad.
Dean Winchester: [surprised] Well I never thought I'd hear you say that.
Sam Winchester: Well, he could've gone a whole other way after Mom. A little more tequila, a little less demon hunting, and we would've had Max's childhood. All things considered, we turned out okay. Thanks to him.
Dean Winchester: [nods] All things considered.

Sam Winchester: Dean, I been thinkin'.
Dean Winchester: Oh, that's never a good thing.
Sam Winchester: I'm serious. I been thinkin': why would this demon, whatever it is, why would it kill Mom and Jessica and Max's mother? You know, what does it want?
Dean Winchester: No idea.
Sam Winchester: Well, you think maybe it, it was after us? After Max and me?
Dean Winchester: Why would you think that?
Sam Winchester: I mean, either telekinesis or premonitions, we both had abilities, you know? Maybe, maybe it was after us for some reason.
Dean Winchester: Sam, if it wanted you it would've just taken you. Okay? This is not your fault. It's not about you.
Sam Winchester: Then what is it about?
Dean Winchester: It's about that damn thing that did this to our family. The thing that we're gonna find, the thing that we're gonna kill. And that's all.
Sam Winchester: Actually there's uh... something else too.
Dean Winchester: Oh jeez, what?
Sam Winchester: When Max locked me in that closet, that big cabinet against the door... I moved it.
Dean Winchester: Huh. You got a little more upper body strength than I gave you credit for!
Sam Winchester: No man, I *moved* it. Like... Max.
Dean Winchester: [slightly freaked] Oh. Right.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [holding out a spoon] Bend this.

"Supernatural: Yellow Fever (#4.6)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: [upon finding Dean in the parking lot of the hotel] What are you doing waiting out here anyway?
Dean Winchester: Our room's on the fourth floor... That's high.

Sam Winchester: We've been ignoring the biggest clue we have. You!
Dean Winchester: I don't wanna be a clue!

Sam Winchester: Dude, where are you going? That was our hotel.
Dean Winchester: Sam, I'm not going to make a left hand turn into on coming traffic. I'm not suicidal. Did I just say that? That's kind of weird.

Sam Winchester: Dude, you're going 20.
Dean Winchester: And?
Sam Winchester: That's the speed limit.
Dean Winchester: What? Safety's a crime now?

Dean Winchester: I don't scare people.
Sam Winchester: Dean all we do is scare people.
Dean Winchester: Okay, well, then you're a dick, too.
Sam Winchester: Apparently I'm not.

Sam Winchester: Basically they were all dicks.
Dean Winchester: So, you're saying I'm a dick?

Sam Winchester: How're you feeling, by the way?
Dean Winchester: Fine.
Bobby Singer: You sure, Dean? 'Cause this line of work can get awful scary.
Dean Winchester: I'm fine. What, you wanna go hunt? I'll hunt. I'll kill anything.
Sam Winchester: Aww...
Bobby Singer: He's adorable.

Dean Winchester: This isn't gonna work. I mean, come on, these badges are fake, what if we get busted, we could go to jail!
Sam Winchester: Dean, shhh! Calm down. Deep breath, okay?
[Dean takes a deep breath]
Sam Winchester: There, you feel better?
[Dean shakes his head, no]
Sam Winchester: Just, come on.

Snake Guy: Tyler and Perry. Just like Aerosmith!
Sam Winchester: Yeah, small world.

Dean Winchester: Let's do this!
[opens trunk, then looks over at the factory]
Dean Winchester: It's a little spooky, isn't it?
[Sam holds out a pistol for Dean]
Dean Winchester: Oh, I'm not carrying that.
[Sam looks confused]
Dean Winchester: It could go off! I'll man the flashlight.
Sam Winchester: You do that.

Dean Winchester: I mean, come on, Sam. What are we doing?
Sam Winchester: We're hunting a ghost.
Dean Winchester: A ghost, exactly. Who does that?
Sam Winchester: Us.
Dean Winchester: Us, right. And that, Sam, that is exactly why our lives suck. I mean come on, we hunt monsters. What the hell? I mean, normal people, they see a monster and they run, but not us. No, no, no we-we search out things that want to kill us, yeah, huh, or eat us. You know who does that? Crazy people. We are insane. You know, and then there's the-the-the bad diner food. And-and the-the skeevy motel rooms. And then the truck stop waitress with the bizzare rash. I mean who wants this life Sam? Huh? Seriously? I mean do you actually like being stuck in a car with me eight hours a day, every single day? I don't think so. I mean, I drive too fast and I listen to the same five albums over and over and over again and-and-and I sing along, I'm annoying, I know that. And you, you're gassy. You eat half a burrito and you get toxic. I mean, you know what?
[throws keys to Sam]
Dean Winchester: You can forget it.
Sam Winchester: Whoa, Dean. Where are you going?
Dean Winchester: Stay away from me, Sam. Okay? 'Cause I am done with it. I'm done with the monsters and the-the hellhounds and the ghost sickness and the damn apocalypse! I'm out. I'm done. I quit.

Sam Winchester: I just talked to Bobby.
[Hands a box of donuts to Dean]
Dean Winchester: And?
[Sniffs the box then tosses it in the car. Sam watches him quizzically]
Sam Winchester: Well, you're not gonna like it.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: It's ghost sickness.
Dean Winchester: Ghost sickness?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [slumps against the car, dejected] Oh, God no...
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: I don't even know what that is.

Sam Winchester: Hey.
[Dean is scratching at his arm]
Sam Winchester: Quit pickin' at that. How ya feeling?
Dean Winchester: Awesome. It's nice to have my head on the chopping block again. I almost forgot what that feels like. It's freakin' delightful.

Sam Winchester: So, uh... so what did you see? Near the end, I mean.
Dean Winchester: What, besides a cop beatin' my ass?
Sam Winchester: Seriously.
Dean Winchester: [sighs, seems about to explain, then looks at Sam, sees his eyes go yellow for a second, then looks away] Howler monkeys. Whole room full of 'em. Those things creep the hell out of me.
Sam Winchester: Right.
Dean Winchester: No. Just the usual stuff, Sammy. Nothin' I couldn't handle.
[a faraway look comes into his eyes]

"Supernatural: Wishful Thinking (#4.8)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: I can see you're very interested.
Dean Winchester: Women, showers... We gotta save these people!

Sam Winchester: Look me in the eye and tell me you don't remember a thing from your time down under.
Dean Winchester: [Looks Sam in the eye] I don't remember a thing from my time down under. I don't remember Sam.

Sam Winchester: Are we-? Should we-? Uh-
Sam Winchester: Are we gonna kill this teddy bear?
Dean Winchester: How, huh? We shoot it, burn it?
Sam Winchester: I dont know. Both?
Dean Winchester: How do we even know that's gonna work? I mean, I don't want some giant, flaming, pissed-off teddy on our hands.

Audrey Elmer: All I ever wanted was a teddy which was big, real and talked. But now he's sad all the time - not ouch sad, but ouch in the head sad - says weird stuff and smells like the bus.
Dean Winchester: Um, little girl...
Audrey Elmer: [exasperated] Audrey.
Dean Winchester: Audrey, how exactly did your teddy become real?
Audrey Elmer: I wished for it.
Sam Winchester: You wished for it?
Audrey Elmer: At the wishing well.

Dean Winchester: I gotta tell you, I'm pretty disappointed.
Sam Winchester: Well,
Sam Winchester: you wanted to save naked women.
Dean Winchester: Damn right I wanted to save some naked women!

Dean Winchester: I shouldn't have lied to you. I do remember everything that happened to me in the pit. Everything.
Sam Winchester: So, tell me about it.
Dean Winchester: No. I won't lie anymore, but I'm not gonna talk about it.
Sam Winchester: Dean, look, you can't just shoulder this thing alone. You gotta let me help.
Dean Winchester: How? You really think that a little heart-to-heart, some sharing and caring, is going to change anything? Huh? Somehow heal me? I'm not talking about a bad day here.
Sam Winchester: I know that.
Dean Winchester: The things that I saw, there aren't words, there is no forgetting, there's no making it better. Because it is right here,
[Points to head]
Dean Winchester: forever. You wouldn't understand and I could never make you understand. So I am sorry.

Wesley Mondale: Aren't you the guys from the Health Department?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. And florists on the side.
Dean Winchester: Plus FBI. And on Thursdays, we're teddy bear doctors.

Dean Winchester: We never get what we want, and in fact, we have to fight tooth and nail just to keep what we've got.
Sam Winchester: But you know what? Maybe that's the whole point, Wes.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, maybe people are people 'cause they're miserable bastards, 'cause they never get what they really want.
Sam Winchester: Right, yeah. You get what you want, you get crazy.

Sam Winchester: It's gotta be a joke, right? Some big ass mother in a gorilla suit?
Dean Winchester: Or it's a bigfoot. You know, he's some kind of a... alco-holo-porno addict. Kinda like a deep woods Duchovny.
[smiles, very pleased with himself]

Dean Winchester: [Looking at the wishing well with Sam] Think it works?
Sam Winchester: Got a better explanation for Teddy back there?
Dean Winchester: There's one way to find out.
[Pulls out a coin]
Sam Winchester: Whaddya gonna wish for?
Dean Winchester: Shh.
[Tosses the coin in]
Dean Winchester: Not supposed to tell.
Waiter: [Walks in behind them, holding up a sandwich] Somebody order a foot long Italian with jalapeno.
Dean Winchester: That'd be me.
[He and Sam look at each other, then at the well]

Dean Winchester: C'mon. Aren't you a little bit tempted?
[tosses Sam a coin]
Sam Winchester: No.
[He gives the coin back]
Sam Winchester: Wouldn't be real. Wouldn't trust it.
Dean Winchester: I don't know. That bear seemed pretty real.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: C'mon. If you could wish yourself back, you know, before it all started. Think about it. You'd be some big yuppie lawyer with a nice car, and a white picket fence.
Sam Winchester: Not what I'd wish for.
Dean Winchester: Seriously?
Sam Winchester: It's too late to go back to our old lives, Dean. I'm not that guy anymore.
Dean Winchester: Alright, well what then? Hmmm? What would Sammy wish for?
Sam Winchester: [deadly serious] Lilith's head on a plate. Bloody.
Dean Winchester: Okay.

Chinese Waiter: [Watching Dean trying to pry up the old coin with a crow bar] Hey, hey, hey, what is this? You're gonna break my fountain!
Sam Winchester: [sternly] Sir, I don't want to slap you with a 44 slash 16, but I will.
[Dean gives Sam a look, impressed. The waiter walks away]
Sam Winchester: Alright, thanks.

Sam Winchester: Right. Yeah. You get what you want, you get crazy.
Dean Winchester: Just take a look at Michael Jackson. Hmmm? Or Hasselhoff.
[He looks at Sam who nods in agreement]

"Supernatural: Scarecrow (#1.11)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: So Dad is sending us to Indiana to go hunting for something before another couple vanishes?
Dean Winchester: Yahtzee!

Sam Winchester: You trust shady van guy and not me?
Meg: [smiles] Definitely!

Sam Winchester: [on cell] The scarecrow climbed off its cross?
Dean Winchester: Yeah I'm tellin' you. Burkettsville Indiana. Fun little town.
Sam Winchester: It didn't kill the couple, did it?
Dean Winchester: No. No, I *can* cope without you, you know.
Sam Winchester: So something must be animating it. A spirit.
Dean Winchester: No, it's more than a spirit. It's a god. A pagan god, anyway.
Sam Winchester: What makes you say that?
Dean Winchester: The annual cycle of its killings, and the fact that the victims are always a man and a woman, like some kind of fertility rite. And you should see the locals. The way they treated this couple. Fattening 'em up like a Christmas turkey.
Sam Winchester: The last meal. Given to sacrificial victims.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I'm thinkin' a ritual sacrifice to appease some pagan god.
Sam Winchester: So a god possesses a scarecrow...
Dean Winchester: ...The scarecrow takes its sacrifice, and for another year the crops won't wilt and disease won't spread.
Sam Winchester: You know which god you're dealin' with?
Dean Winchester: No, not yet.
Sam Winchester: Well, you figure out what it is, you can figure out a way to kill it.
Dean Winchester: I'm actually on my way to a local community college. I've got an appointment with a professor. You know, since I don't have my trusty sidekick geek boy to do all the research.

Bus Station Clerk: Sorry, the Sacramento bus doesn't run again 'til tomorrow. Uh, 5:05 pm.
Sam Winchester: Tomorrow? There's got to be another way.
Bus Station Clerk: Well there is. Buy a car.

[Sam finds Dean and Emily tied up in the orchard]
Dean Winchester: [relieved] Oh, I take everything back I said. I'm so happy to see you! C'mon.
[Sam starts untying him]
Dean Winchester: How'd you get here?
Sam Winchester: I uh... stole a car.
Dean Winchester: Ha-ha-ha! That's my boy! Keep an eye on that scarecrow. It could come alive any minute.
Sam Winchester: [looking] What scarecrow?
[Dean gets up and looks; the scarecrow is gone]

Sam Winchester: [On the phone] You know, if you're hinting you need my help, just ask.
Dean Winchester: I'm not hinting anything. Actually, uh... I want you to know... I mean, don't think...
Sam Winchester: Yeah. I'm sorry too.
Dean Winchester: Sam. You were right. You gotta do your own thing. You gotta live your own life.
Sam Winchester: You serious?
Dean Winchester: You've always known what you want. And you go after it. You stand up to Dad. And you always have. Hell, I wish I... Anyway, I admire that about you. I'm proud of you, Sammy.
Sam Winchester: I don't even know what to say.
Dean Winchester: Say you'll take care of yourself.
Sam Winchester: I will.
Dean Winchester: Call me when you find Dad.
Sam Winchester: [sadly] Ok. Bye, Dean.
[They hang up. Meg wakes up and sits next to Sam]
Meg: Who was that?
Sam Winchester: My brother.
Meg: What'd he say?
Sam Winchester: Goodbye.

Dean Winchester: So, can I drop you off somewhere?
Sam Winchester: Nah, I think you're stuck with me.
Dean Winchester: What made you change your mind?
Sam Winchester: I didn't. I still want to find Dad... and you're still a pain in the ass. But Jess and Mom... they're both gone. Dad is God knows where. You and me, we're all that's left. So, uh, if we're gonna see this through, we're gonna do it together.
Dean Winchester: Hold me, Sam. That was beautiful.

Sam Winchester: [on cell] Dad, where are you?
John Winchester: Sorry kiddo, I can't tell you that.
Sam Winchester: What? Why not?
Dean Winchester: Is that Dad?
John Winchester: Look, I know this is hard for you to understand, you just, you're gonna have to trust me on this.
Sam Winchester: You're after it aren't you? The thing that killed Mom.
John Winchester: Yeah. It's a demon, Sam.
Sam Winchester: A demon? You know for sure?
Dean Winchester: A demon, what's he sayin'?
John Winchester: I do. Listen Sammy, I uh, I also know what happened to your girlfriend. I'm so sorry. I would've done anything to protect you from that.

John Winchester: I think I'm finally closing in on it.
Sam Winchester: Let us help.
John Winchester: You can't. You can't be any part of it.
Sam Winchester: Why not?
Dean Winchester: [holding out a hand] Gimme the phone.
John Winchester: Listen Sammy, that's why I'm callin'. You and your brother, you gotta stop lookin' for me. All right, now I need you to write down these names.
Sam Winchester: Names? What names? Dad, what... talk to me, tell me what's going on!
John Winchester: Look, we don't have time for this! This is bigger than you think, they're everywhere. Even us talking right now, it's, it's not safe.
Sam Winchester: No! All right? No way!
Dean Winchester: Gimme the phone!
John Winchester: I've given you an order. Now you stop following me, and you do your job. You understand me? Now take down these names.
Dean Winchester: [snatching the phone] Dad! It's me, where are you?
[he listens]
Dean Winchester: Yes sir. Uh. Yeah, I got a pen. What're the names?

Sam Winchester: All right, so the names Dad gave us, they're all couples?
Dean Winchester: Three different couples, all went missing.
Sam Winchester: And they're all from different towns, different states?
Dean Winchester: That's right, yeah, Washington, New York, Colorado. Each couple took a road trip cross country, none of 'em arrived at their destination, none of 'em were ever heard from again.
Sam Winchester: Well it's a big country Dean, they could've disappeared anywhere.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, could've, but each one's route took 'em through the same part of Indiana. Always on the second week of April, one year after another after another.
Sam Winchester: This is the second week of April.
Dean Winchester: Yep.
Sam Winchester: So Dad is sending us to Indiana, to go hunting for something before another couple vanishes?
Dean Winchester: Yahtzee.

Sam Winchester: We're not goin' to Indiana.
Dean Winchester: We're not?
Sam Winchester: No. We're going to California. Dad called from a payphone. With a Sacramento area code.
Dean Winchester: Sam...
Sam Winchester: Dean, if this demon killed Mom and Jess and Dad's closing in, we gotta be there. We gotta help!
Dean Winchester: Dad doesn't want our help!
Sam Winchester: Well I don't care!
Dean Winchester: He's given us an order!
Sam Winchester: I *don't care*! We don't always have to do what he says!
Dean Winchester: Sam, Dad is asking us to work jobs, to *save lives*, it's important!
Sam Winchester: All right, I understand, believe me, I understand, but I'm talking one week, here, man, to get answers. To get revenge!
Dean Winchester: All right, look, I know how you feel...
Sam Winchester: Do you?
[laughs slightly]
Sam Winchester: How old were you when Mom died? Four? Jess died, *six months ago*. How the hell would you know how I feel?

Dean Winchester: Dad said it wasn't safe. For any of us. I mean, he obviously knows somethin' that we don't, so if he says to stay away, we stay away!
Sam Winchester: I don't understand the blind faith you have in the man. I mean, it's like you don't even question him!
Dean Winchester: Yeah, it's called being a good son!

Dean Winchester: How did you get here?
Sam Winchester: I... stole a car.
Dean Winchester: Ha ha! That's my boy!

"Supernatural: Swan Song (#5.22)" (2010)
Sam Winchester: Take care of these guys, okay?
Castiel: [sighs lightly] That's not possible.
Sam Winchester: [chuckles] Then humor me.
Castiel: Oh. I was supposed to lie.
Sam Winchester: [chuckles again]
Castiel: [with attempted nonchalance] Uh... Sure. They'll be fine. I...
Sam Winchester: Just- just... stop talking.

[Two demons walk up to Sam and Dean]
Dean Winchester: Hi, guys.
[Referring to Lucifer]
Dean Winchester: Is your father home?

Sam Winchester: Judgement Day's a runaway train, we just want off.

Sam Winchester: Dean. What's goin' on?
Dean Winchester: I'm in.
Sam Winchester: In with...?
Dean Winchester: The whole up with satan thing. I'm on board.
Sam Winchester: [Skeptical] You're gonna let me say yes.
Dean Winchester: No. That's the thing. It's not *on* me to *let* you do anything. You're a grown, well *over* grown man. If this is what you want, I'll back your play.
Sam Winchester: That's the last thing I thought you'd ever say.
Dean Winchester: Might be. I'm not gonna lie to you though. It goes against every fiber I got. I mean, the truth is... watching out for you? It's kinda been my job, you know? But, more than that, it's... it's kinda who I am. But, you're not a kid anymore, Sam. And I can't keep treatin' you like one. Maybe I gotta grow up a little, too. I don't know if we gotta a snowball's chance... But... But I do know that if anybody can do it, it's you.
Sam Winchester: [It means everything to hear Dean say that. Softly] Thank you.
Dean Winchester: If this is what you want... Is this really what you want?
Sam Winchester: I let him out. I gotta put him back in.
Dean Winchester: Okay. That's it then.

Sam Winchester: Hey, um. On the subject, there's something I gotta talk to you about.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: This thing goes our way, and I triple lindy into that box... you know I'm not comin' back.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I'm aware.
Sam Winchester: So, you gotta promise me something.
Dean Winchester: Okay. Yeah, anything.
Sam Winchester: You gotta promise not to try to bring me back.
Dean Winchester: What? No, I didn't sign up for that.
Sam Winchester: Dean...
Dean Winchester: Your hell is gonna make my tour look like Graceland! You want me just to sit by and do nothin'?
Sam Winchester: Once the cage is shut you can't go poking at it, Dean, it's too risky.
Dean Winchester: No, no, no, no. As if I'm just gonna let you *rot* in there.
Sam Winchester: [Adamantly] Yeah, you are. You don't have a choice.
Dean Winchester: You can't ask me to do this.
Sam Winchester: I'm sorry, Dean. You have to.
Dean Winchester: So, what am I supposed to do?
Sam Winchester: You go find Lisa. You pray to God she's dumb enough to take you in. You have barbeques, and... go to football games. You go live some normal, apple pie life, Dean. *Promise* me.
[Dean looks at him, but doesn't answer]

Sam Winchester: [Standing with Dean over the open trunk containing several jugs of demon blood. Faced with what he has to do, he can't look at Dean] You mind not watchin' this?

Castiel: Hey, ass-butt.

Castiel: The only thing you're going to see out there is Michael killing your brother.
Dean Winchester: Well, then I ain't gonna let him die alone.

Castiel: You got what you asked for, Dean. No paradise, no hell, just more of the same. I mean it, Dean. What would you rather have: peace... or freedom?

Lucifer: [Lucifer in Sam's body] Castiel. Did you just molotov my brother, with holy fire?
Dean Winchester: [Dean advances on Castiel with a very intense look]
Castiel: Uh, no.
Lucifer: No one dicks with Michael, but me.
[Snaps his fingers and Castiel explodes in a rain of blood and chunks of meat]

Lucifer: Sorry if it's a bit chilly. Most people think I burn hot, it's actually quite the opposite.
Dean Winchester: Well, I'll alert the media.

Lucifer: Come on Sam I've never lied to you, you could at least pay me the same respect. It's OK I'm not mad. A wrestling match inside your noggin', I like the idea. Just you and me, one round, no tricks. You win, you jump in the hole, I win, well then I win. What d'ya say Sam? A fiddle of gold against your soul says I'm better than you.

"Supernatural: Hunteri Heroici (#8.8)" (2012)
Dean Winchester: [Satisfied with his plans that Cas will travel with them to their next case] Alright then.
Castiel: Can I, uh... at least ride in the front seat?
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: No!

Dean Winchester: Okay. Well, let's say that, uh, Gary here is on the prowl. But, he's playin' it safe because...
[Chuckles as he lifts the victim's left hand to reveal a wedding ring]
Dean Winchester: dude's married. Doesn't want anyone to see his ride parked out in front of a by-the-hour fleabag...
Sam Winchester: So, he stashes his car at the park across the street and meets Olivia there.
Dean Winchester: His wife probably found out about it and it broke her heart.
Sam Winchester: So she breaks his. Sounds witchy.
Dean Winchester: Yes, it does. Guy was living a lie and it came back to bite him the ticker.
[to Cas]
Dean Winchester: But, nice job on that bladder infection.

Dean Winchester: The whole heart jumpin' out of a guy's chest. The, the delayed fall. That's straight up Bugs Bunny.
Castiel: So, we're looking for some sort of... insect rabbit hybrid? How do we kill it?
Sam Winchester: No. We don't, Cas. That's a character. Like uh, like Woody Woodpecker. Or Daffy Duck.
Dean Winchester: They're little animated movies. You know, uh, the coyote chases the roadrunner.
Dean Winchester: And then the anvil gets dropped on his head.
Castiel: And that's supposed to be funny?
Dean Winchester: [His smile disappears] No.
[pause, then seriously]
Dean Winchester: It's hilarious.

Sam Winchester: [He, Dean and Cas are in the Sunset Fields retirement home following a lead. An elderly man using a walker and oxygen mask walks past and Dean presses himself against the wall to move away from him, heaving a deep breath and almost gagging after the man goes by] C'mon, it's not that bad.
Dean Winchester: You can't tell me this joint doesn't give you the heebs and or jeebs.

Dean Winchester: What's the word, Cass?
Castiel: It's the shortened version of my name.
Dean Winchester: Yes, it is.

Dean Winchester: All right. Let's gear up. It's wabbit season.
Castiel: I don't think you pronounced that correctly.

Dean Winchester: Cass. Let's go.
Castiel: [interrogating a cat] I've almost cracked him.
Dean Winchester: Now.
Castiel: Hey. I'm not through with you.
Cat: Dumbass.

[Castiel turns off the TV after watching a Looney Toons cartoon]
Castiel: [Chuckling] I understand. The bird represents God, Coyote is Man, endlessly chasing the divine and yet never able to catch him.
[Dean and Sam give Castiel a confused look]
Castiel: It's hilarious.

Castiel: [Examining the victim's body] I can't sense any EMF or sulphur. Mr. Freleng's arterial health is, uh... excellent.
[He leans over and sniffs the body]
Castiel: Mm. He did recently suffer from a... mild, uh... what is that... bladder infection.
Dean Winchester: Cas. Stop smelling the dead guy.

Mrs. Frieling: I- I don't understand. Gary had a heart attack. Why would the FBI...
Dean Winchester: Parks are government property. We've just got a few questions for you.
Castiel: [to Dean quietly] I'll, uh, I'll handle this. I've done research. I can crack her.
[He moves over to lean close to the widow]
Castiel: Now... Miss Freleng... I don't wanna bother you. I, I really don't. But, I- I do have just one question for you.
[He suddenly slams his hand on the table top, moves menacingly close to her and yells. She, Sam and Dean all jump]
Castiel: Why did you kill your husband?
Dean Winchester: Agent Stills. A word, please.
Castiel: [Moves over to Dean as Sam moves to comfort the now crying widow] What? I was being bad cop.
Dean Winchester: You were being bad *everything*!

Dean Winchester: [after learning that Gary Freleng and his widow had an "open" marriage] Friggin' suburbs, man.
Castiel: [Finally catching up] So, she's not a witch.
Dean Winchester: Just the best wife *ever*.
Castiel: Then what killed her husband?
Dean Winchester: Who gives a-
[Cut to exterior traffic scene and the sound of a loud horn honking]

Dean Winchester: [Frowning as he realizes that Cas is going through his bathroom kit] Cas, you gonna book a room or what?
Castiel: [Holding toothpaste and a toothbrush in one hand and digging deeper with his other] No, I'll stay here.
Dean Winchester: Oh, okay. Yeah. We'll have a slumber party. You can braid Sam's hair. Where you gonna sleep?
Castiel: [Finally putting the bathroom kit aside and looking up] I don't sleep.
Dean Winchester: Okay, well, I need my four hours. So...
Castiel: [Earnestly] I'll watch over you.
Dean Winchester: [More than a little uneasy at the thought] That's not gonna happen.

"Supernatural: Mystery Spot (#3.11)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: Man, I had a weird dream.
Dean Winchester: Yeah? Clowns or midgets?

Dean Winchester: I'm tellin' you, Sam, this job is small-fry. We should be spending our time hunting down Bela.
Sam Winchester: Sure, we'll get right on that. Where is she again?
Dean Winchester: Shut up.

Sam Winchester: Yesterday was Tuesday, right? But today is Tuesday, too!
Dean Winchester: ...Yeah, no, good, you're - totally balanced.

Sam Winchester: You don't remember any of this?
Dean Winchester: Any of what?
Sam Winchester: This. Like it's - happened before?
Dean Winchester: You mean like deja vu?
Sam Winchester: No, like it's - like it's really happened before.
Dean Winchester: ...Yeah, like deja vu.
Sam Winchester: Forget about deja vu! I'm asking you if it feels like we're living yesterday all over again?
Dean Winchester: Okay, how is that not...
Sam Winchester: Don't say it!

Dean Winchester: [after Sam caught the falling hot sauce bottle] Nice reflexes.
Sam Winchester: I knew it was going happen, Dean. I know everything that's going to happen.
Dean Winchester: You don't know *every*thing.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I do.
[in unison with Dean]
Sam Winchester: Yeah right. Nice guess. It wasn't guess.
Dean Winchester: [in unison] Right, you're a mind reader. Cut it out Sam. Sam! You think you're being funny but you're being really, really childish. Sam Winchester wears make-up. Sam Winchester cries his way through sex. Sam Winchesters keeps a ruler by the bed and every morning when he wakes up- okay, enough!

Dean Winchester: [after Sam tells Dean he saw him get hit by a car] And?
Sam Winchester: And what?
Dean Winchester: Did it look cool, like in the movies?
Sam Winchester: You peed yourself.
Dean Winchester: Of course, I peed myself. Man gets hit by a car, you think he had full control of his bladder? Come on!

Dean Winchester: [Sam is tearing apart the Mystery Spot with an ax] Sammy! That's enough. Give me the ax.
Sam Winchester: Leave it, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Give it!
Sam Winchester: No, you give it! Get off!
Dean Winchester: Let it go, come on!

Dean Winchester: [about the Mystery Spot] We'll go tonight after close, get ourselves a good long look.
Sam Winchester: Wait, what? No!
Dean Winchester: Why not?
Sam Winchester: Uh... let's just go now. Right now. Business hours, nice and crowded.
Dean Winchester: My God, you're a freak.

Dean Winchester: [after Sam has told him he knows everything that is going to happen] You don't know everything...
Sam Winchester: [pointedly] Yeah. I do.
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: [in unison] Yeah right.
[a beat]
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Nice guess.
Sam Winchester: It wasn't a guess.
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: [in unison] Right, you're a mind reader. Cut it out. Sam.
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Sam!
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: [rapidly, in unison] You think you're being funny but you're being really, really childish.
[another beat]
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: [faster, in unison] Sam Winchester wears make-up.
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Sam Winchester cries his way through sex.
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Sam Winchester keeps a ruler by the bed and every morning when he wakes up he... OKAY ENOUGH!

Dean Winchester: [in the shower] -So we can't even go out for breakfast?
Sam Winchester: Trust me, you'll thank me when it's Wednesday!
Dean Winchester: What ever that means.

Sam Winchester: [to Ed Coleman] Don't lie to me. I know what you are. We've killed one of your kind before.
Trickster: [Ed Coleman morphs into the Trickster] Actually, bucko, you didn't.

Sam Winchester: I had a weird dream.
Dean Winchester: Yeah? Clowns or midgets?

"Supernatural: Tall Tales (#2.15)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: Dean, did you touch my computer?
Dean Winchester: Uh, no.
Sam Winchester: Eh, well, then why is it frozen at ""?
[Dean smiles awkwardly and walks away]
Sam Winchester: Just... don't touch my stuff anymore, okay?
Dean Winchester: [yelling] HEY! Why don't you control your OCD?

Sam Winchester: How would you feel if I screwed up your Impala?
Dean Winchester: Would be the last thing you'd do.

Sam Winchester: I never said that!
Dean Winchester: You're always saying pansy stuff like that.

Dean Winchester: You think this is funny?
Sam Winchester: Depends, what?
Dean Winchester: The car.
Sam Winchester: what about the car.
Dean Winchester: You can't let the air out of the tires, you idiot. You're gonna bend the rims!
Sam Winchester: Whoa, wait a minute. I didn't go near your car.

Sam Winchester: [Being portrayed in Dean's recap] Dean! This is a very serious investigation. We don't have time for any of your blah blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah. Blah... blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah. BLAH!
[Holds/draws out the last "blah"]
Sam Winchester: [In thereal life present time] I don't sound like that, Dean!
Dean Winchester: You do to me.

Sam Winchester: What are you drinking?
Dean Winchester: I don't know, man. I think they're called purple nurples.

Sam Winchester: We should get help. I'll call Bobby, see if he ever ran into anything like this.
Dean Winchester: Oh I'm sure he has it's just your standard haunted campus, alien abduction, alligator in a sewer gig.

Sam Winchester: [after Sam discovers his laptop is missing] Dude, y'know, I put up with a lot from you.
Dean Winchester: Whaddya talkin' 'bout, I'm a joy to be around!
Sam Winchester: Yeah? Your dirty socks in the sink, your food in the fridge...
Dean Winchester: What's wrong with my food?
Sam Winchester: It's not food anymore, Dean, it's Darwinism!

Bobby Singer: You're bickering like an old married couple.
Dean Winchester: No, see, married couples can get divorced. Me and him? We're like, Siamese twins.
Sam Winchester: It's conjoined twins.
Dean Winchester: See what I mean?

Dean Winchester: [after hearing Sam's version/recap about what happened at the bar] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's not what happened!
Sam Winchester: No? So you didn't drink a purple nurple?

Sam Winchester: [trying to apologize] Um, I just want to say that I'm, uh, um...
Dean Winchester: Hey. Me too.
Bobby Singer: You guys are breaking my heart, could we please just leave?

Dean Winchester: [Voice over, telling Bobby what happened] What could we do? So, we just kept on digging.
Sam Winchester: You and this guy, Curtis, you were in the same house?
Frat Pledge: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: You heard what happened to him, right?
Frat Pledge: Yeah, he says it was aliens, but, you know... whatever.
Sam Winchester: [softly] Look, man, I... I know this all has to be so hard.
Frat Pledge: Uh, not so much.
Sam Winchester: [extremely sympathetic] But, I want you to know... I'm here for you.
[looking deeply into his eyes]
Sam Winchester: You brave little soldier. I acknowledge your pain.
[awkwardness grows as Sam reaches for him]
Sam Winchester: C'mere.
[Sam grabs the frat pledge in a bear hug and is close to tears as Dean looks away in discomfort]
Sam Winchester: Too precious for this world.
[cut to motel room]
Sam Winchester: I never said that!
Dean Winchester: You're always sayin' pansy stuff like that.

"Supernatural: Dream a Little Dream of Me (#3.10)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: So what's Bobby doing in Pittsburgh?
Dean Winchester: Unless he's taking an extremely lame vacation...

Dean Winchester: I take it we believe the legends.
Sam Winchester: When don't we?

Dean Winchester: Dude, you were out. And makin' some serious happy noises. Who were you dreaming about?
Sam Winchester: What? No one. Nothing.
Dean Winchester: Come on, you can tell me. Angelina Jolie?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: Brad Pitt?
Sam Winchester: No!

Dean Winchester: Should we dim the lights and synch up Wizard of Oz to Dark Side of the Moon?
Sam Winchester: Why?
Dean Winchester: What did you DO during college?

Sam Winchester: Dean, are you sure you don't want me to drive? You seem a little... caffeinated.
Dean Winchester: Thanks for the newsflash, Edison!

Dean Winchester: Pack your crap.
Sam Winchester: Why? Where are we going?
Dean Winchester: We're gonna go hunt the bitch down.

Dean Winchester: I've been doin' some thinkin'. And... the thing is... I don't want to die. I don't want to go to Hell.
Sam Winchester: Yeah. We'll... find a way to save you.
Dean Winchester: Okay, good...

Sam Winchester: One problem though. We're fresh out of African Dream Root. So, unless you know someone who can score some...
Dean Winchester: [His heart sinks as realization dawns] Crap.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Bela.
Sam Winchester: [Surprised] Bela?
[Now his heart sinks... ]
Sam Winchester: Crap. You're actually suggesting we ask her for a favor?
Dean Winchester: I'm feelin' dirty just thinkin' about it, but yeah.

Sam Winchester: [They are about to drink the tea made of African Dream Root] Wait, wait! Wait. Can't forget this.
[He removes a small envelope from his pocket, removes something from it]
Sam Winchester: Here.
[He puts some in Dean's hand]
Dean Winchester: What the hell is that?
Sam Winchester: Bobby's hair.
Dean Winchester: We have to drink Bobby's hair?
Sam Winchester: [He puts some in his own drink] That's how you control whose dream you're entering. You gotta... drink some of their, uh...
[He swallows in distaste]
Sam Winchester: some of their body.
Dean Winchester: [Stares at his hand, then shrugs] Well. Guess the hair of the dog is better than other parts of the body.

Sam Winchester: Hey, when did it start raining?
Dean Winchester: [Opens the curtain] When did it start raining upside down?

Sam Winchester: How'd he get in there in the first place? Isn't he supposed to have some of your hair or DNA or something?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Bobby Singer: [With deep regret and disappointment in himself] Yeah. Before I knew it was him, he offered me a beer. I drank it. Dumbest friggin' thing.
Sam Winchester: [Resignation sinks in as he remembers he also drank a beer with him] Ah, I don't know. It wasn't that dumb...
Sam Winchester: Dean, you didn't.
Dean Winchester: [Knows he's in deep trouble. Softly] I was thirsty.

"Supernatural: The Devil in the Details (#11.10)" (2016)
Lucifer: Dean? You're betting on Dean?
Sam Winchester: I always have.

Dean Winchester: [Sam's voicemail] Hey, Sam can't talk right now because he's waxing. Like everything. But I will leave...
Sam Winchester: [still on voicemail] Dean, what are you doing with my phone? Dean, come on.

Lucifer: Did I ever tell you how much I respect you?
Sam Winchester: What?
Lucifer: Don't get me wrong, I never liked you, you're sort of prissy, but in this moment, when you stood toe to toe with me and won, I gotta say you had balls, kid.

Sam Winchester: Let's say you could gank her. Then what?
Lucifer: Go to L.A., solve crimes?

Sam Winchester: No. My answer is no. This isn't because of Dean, or- or the past, this is about me, having faith in my friends, having faith in my family. We will find a way.

Sam Winchester: I'm ready to die. And I'm ready to watch people I love die. But I'm not ready to be your bitch.

Castiel: Let me take your temperature.
Dean Winchester: No, not gonna happen.

Dean Winchester: If it did work and she is dead, bring her body out.
Castiel: And if she's not?

Ambriel: Are you gonna kill me?
Castiel: Is that what they say? That I kill angels?
Ambriel: That's the nicest thing they say.
Ambriel: So maybe we can work together? So that no one murders anyone?

Lucifer: Last words?
Castiel: Can you really beat her?
Lucifer: I can.
Castiel: Then yes.

Lucifer: Ass-butt? I-I-I-I still don't get that.

"Supernatural: A Very Supernatural Christmas (#3.8)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: [Sam opens Christmas present from Dean]
Sam Winchester: Skin mags!
Sam Winchester: [opens the next package]
Sam Winchester: and... shaving cream!

Sam Winchester: Well, we're not dealing with the anti-Clause.
Dean Winchester: What'd Bobby say?
Sam Winchester: Uh, that we're morons.

Dean Winchester: Find anything?
Sam Winchester: Stockings, mistletoe, this...
[hands Dean the tooth]
Dean Winchester: A tooth? Where was this?
Sam Winchester: In the chimney.
Dean Winchester: Chimney? No way a man fits up a chimney, it's too narrow.
Sam Winchester: No way he fits up in one piece.

Dean Winchester: So, was I right? Is it the serial killing chimney sweep?
Sam Winchester: Yup. It's, uh, it's actually Dick Van Dyke.
Dean Winchester: Who?
Sam Winchester: Mary Poppins?
Dean Winchester: Who's that?
Sam Winchester: Oh come on... Nevermind.

Dean Winchester: So what the hell do you think we're dealing with?
Sam Winchester: Actually, I have an idea.
Dean Winchester: Yeah?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. It's gonna sound crazy...
Dean Winchester: What could you possibly say that sounds crazy to me?
Sam Winchester: Um... Evil Santa.
Dean Winchester: ...Yeah, that's crazy.

Dean Winchester: What are we looking for again?
Sam Winchester: Um, lore says that the Anti-Claus will walk with a limp and smell like sweets.
Dean Winchester: Great, so we're looking for a pimp Santa. Why the sweets?
Sam Winchester: Think about it, Dean. If you smell like candy, the kids will come closer, you know?
Dean Winchester: That's creepy.

Dean Winchester: Wreaths, huh? You sure you didn't want to ask about her shoes? You know, I saw some nice handbags in the foyer...
Sam Winchester: We've seen that wreath beore, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Where?
Sam Winchester: The Walshes. Yesterday.
Dean Winchester: [trying to cover] ...I know... I was just testing you.

Dean Winchester: [re: Meadowsweet] Why would someone be using that as Christmas wreaths?
Sam Winchester: You know, it's not as crazy as it sounds, Dean. I mean, pretty much every Christmas tradition *is* Pagan.
Dean Winchester: Christmas is Jesus's birthday.
Sam Winchester: No, Jesus's birthday was probably in the fall. It was actually the winter solstice festival that was co-opted by the church and renamed Christmas. But I mean the yule log, the tree, even Santa's red suit is all remnants of Pagan worship.
Dean Winchester: How do you know that? What are you going to tell me next, the Easter Bunny's Jewish?

Dean Winchester: So all these Martha Stewart wannabes buying these fancy wreaths...
Sam Winchester: Yup, it pretty much like putting a neon sign on your front door saying "come kill us".

Dean Winchester: So you think we're dealing with a pagan god?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, probably Hold McCar, god of the winter solstice.
[reading from a book]
Sam Winchester: Huh. When you sacrifice to Hold McCar, guess what he gives you in return?
Dean Winchester: Lap dances, hopefully.

Dean Winchester: Remember that wreath dad brought home that one year?
Sam Winchester: You mean the one he stole from, like, a liquor store?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, it was a bunch of empty beer cans.
Dean Winchester: That thing was great.

"Supernatural: The Benders (#1.15)" (2006)
Dean Winchester: Never do that again.
Sam Winchester: Do what?
Dean Winchester: Go missing like that.
Sam Winchester: You were worried about me.
Dean Winchester: All I'm saying is you vanish like that again, I'm not looking for ya.
Sam Winchester: Sure you won't.
Dean Winchester: I'm not.
Sam Winchester: So, you got sidelined by a thirteen-year-old girl, huh?
Dean Winchester: Oh, shut up.
Sam Winchester: Just saying getting rusty there, kiddo.
Dean Winchester: Shut up!

Dean Winchester: [finding Sam and Kathleen in cages] Sam? Are you hurt?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: Damn it's good to see you.
Officer Kathleen: How did you get out of the cuffs?
Dean Winchester: Oh I know a trick or two.
[checking the cage door]
Dean Winchester: Oh. These locks look like they're gonna be a bitch.
Sam Winchester: [pointing] Well there's some kind of automatic control, right there.
Dean Winchester: Have you seen 'em?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. Dude, they're just people.
Dean Winchester: And they jumped you? Must be getting a little rusty there, kiddo.

Sam Winchester: I saw a motel about five miles back...
Dean Winchester: Whoa, whoa, easy. Let's have another round!
Sam Winchester: We should get an early start.
Dean Winchester: Man, you really know how to have fun, don't you Grandma.

Dean Winchester: Could just be a kidnapping. Maybe this isn't our kinda gig.
Sam Winchester: Yeah maybe not. Except for this. Dad marked the area, Dean. Possible hunting grounds for a phantom attacker.
Dean Winchester: Why would he even do that?
Sam Winchester: Well, he found a lot of local folklore about a dark figure that comes out at night, grabs people, then vanishes. He found this too: this county has more missing persons per capita than anywhere else in the state.
Dean Winchester: That is weird.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: Don't phantom attackers usually snatch people from their beds? Jenkins was taken from a parking lot.
Sam Winchester: Well there are all kinds, you know: Spring-heeled Jacks, Phantom Gassers, they, they take people anywhere, anytime. Look Dean, I don't know if this is our kinda gig either...
Dean Winchester: Yeah you're right, we should ask around more tomorrow.

[as Sam tries to pull a metal cable down from above his cage]
Alvin Jenkins: Why don't you give it up Sammy, there's no way out!
Sam Winchester: [straining] Don't... call me... Sammy!
[the cable comes loose, something falls into Sam's cage]
Alvin Jenkins: What is it?
Sam Winchester: It's a bracket.
Alvin Jenkins: [sarcastic] Oh thank God, a bracket, now we got 'em, huh?

[the door of Jenkins' cage unlocks and swings open]
Alvin Jenkins: Must've been a short. Maybe you knocked somethin' loose.
[he steps cautiously out of the cage]
Sam Winchester: I - I think you should get back in there, Jenkins.
Alvin Jenkins: What?
Sam Winchester: This isn't right.
Alvin Jenkins: Don't you wanna get outta here?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. But that was too easy.
Alvin Jenkins: Look, I'm gonna get outta here, I'm gonna send help, okay, don't worry!
Sam Winchester: No! I'm serious! Jenkins! This might be a trap!
Alvin Jenkins: Bye Sammy.
Sam Winchester: Jenkins!
[Jenkins slips out; the cage door closes and re-locks on its own]

[Kathleen wakes up in the cage next to Sam's]
Sam Winchester: You all right?
Officer Kathleen: Are you Sam Winchester? Are you?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Officer Kathleen: Your uh... your cousin's looking for you.
Sam Winchester: Thank God. Where is he?
Officer Kathleen: I uh... I cuffed him to my car.

Dean Winchester: What do they want?
Sam Winchester: I don't know. They let Jenkins go, but that was some sort of trap. It doesn't make any sense to me.
Dean Winchester: Yeah well that's the point. You know, with our, our usual playmates there's, there's rules, there's patterns, but with people... there's just crazy.

Sam Winchester: See anything else out there?
Dean Winchester: Uh, he has about a dozen junked cars sitting out back. Plates from all over, so I'm thinkin' when they take someone they take their car too.
Officer Kathleen: Did you see a black mustang, out there, about ten years old?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, actually, I did.
[Kathleen nods slowly]
Dean Winchester: Your brother's. I'm sorry.

Officer Kathleen: So, State Police and the FBI are gonna be here within the hour. They're gonna want to talk to you. I suggest that you're both long gone by then.
Dean Winchester: Thanks. Hey listen, I don't mean to press our luck, but we're kinda in the middle of nowhere. Think we could catch a ride?
Officer Kathleen: Start walking. Duck if you see a squad car.
Sam Winchester: Sounds great to me, thanks.
Dean Winchester: Listen, um. I'm sorry about your brother.
Officer Kathleen: Thank you. It was really hard not knowing what happened to him; I thought it would be easier, once I knew the truth. But... it isn't, really. Anyway, you should go.
[they start walking]

Sam Winchester: [after finding out the nature of his abductors] I'll be damned. They're just people.

"Supernatural: Bloodlust (#2.3)" (2006)
Sheriff: What newspaper did you say you worked for?
Dean Winchester: World Weekly News.
Sam Winchester: Weekly World News.
Dean Winchester: World...
Sam Winchester: Weekly World News.
Dean Winchester: Wor... I'm new.
Sheriff: Get out of my office.

Sheriff: What newspaper did you say you boys were from?
Dean Winchester: World Weekly News.
Sam Winchester: [correcting him] Weekly World News.
Dean Winchester: [mumbles] Weekly Worl-
[out loud]
Dean Winchester: I'm new.

Dean Winchester: Wish we never took this job. It's jacked everything up.
Sam Winchester: What do you mean?
Dean Winchester: Think about all the hunts we went on, Sammy, our whole lives...
Sam Winchester: [cautious, not knowing where this is going] Okay...
Dean Winchester: What if we killed things that didn't deserve killing? You know? I mean, the way Dad raised us...
Sam Winchester: [compassionate] Dean, after what happened to Mom - Dad did the best he could.
Dean Winchester: I know he did. But the man wasn't perfect. And the way he raised us, to hate these things? And man, I hate 'em, I do. When I killed that vampire at the mill, I didn't even think about it. Hell, I even enjoyed it.
Sam Winchester: You didn't kill Lenore.
Dean Winchester: No, but every instinct told me to. I was gonna kill her. I was gonna kill 'em all.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, Dean, but you didn't. And that's what matters.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
[silent beat, looking away]
Dean Winchester: Because you're a pain in my ass.
Sam Winchester: [smiling] Guess I might have to stick around and be a pain in the ass then.
Dean Winchester: [Humble and dead straight] Thanks.
Sam Winchester: Don't mention it.

[Gordon has just called Sam "Sammy"]
Sam Winchester: [Nods his head towards Dean while looking at Gordon, sternly... ] He's the only one that gets to call me that.

Dean Winchester: [driving his rebuilt 1967 Chevy Impala] Whoo! Listen to her purr. You ever heard anything so sweet?
Sam Winchester: You know, if you two wanna get a room, just let me know, Dean.
Dean Winchester: [talking to the car] Don't listen to him, baby. He doesn't understand us.

Sam Winchester: Give you a couple of severed heads and pile of dead cows and you're Mr. Sunshine.

[Dean is talking to the Impala]
Sam Winchester: [Amused] You know, if you two want to get a room, just let me know, Dean.
Dean Winchester: [to the car] Aw, don't listen to him, baby. He doesn't understand us.

Dean Winchester: Sam, clock me one. Come on. Come on. I won't even hit you back. Let's go.
[Braces himself to be punched]
Sam Winchester: No!
Dean Winchester: Let's go. You get a freebie. Hit me. Come on.
Sam Winchester: You look like you just went 12 rounds with a block of cement, Dean.
[smiling, turning away]
Sam Winchester: I'll take a raincheck.

Sam Winchester: [while examining a severed head] Dean, get me a bucket.
Dean Winchester: You find something?
Sam Winchester: No, I'm going to puke.

Sam Winchester: [about Gordon] I - I thought you said he was a good hunter.
Ellen Harvelle: Yeah, and Hannibal Lecter's a good psychiatrist.

Lenore: My name is Lenore. I'm not gonna hurt you. We just need to talk.
Sam Winchester: Talk? Yeah, okay, but I might have a tough time paying attention to much besides Eli's teeth.
Lenore: He won't hurt you either. You have my word.
Sam Winchester: Your word? Oh yeah, great, thanks. Listen lady no offense, but you're not the first vampire I've met.
Lenore: We're not like the others. We don't kill humans and we don't drink their blood. We haven't for a long time.
Sam Winchester: What is this some kind of joke?
Lenore: Notice you're still alive.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] Okay uh... correct me if I'm wrong here but shouldn't you be starving to death?
Lenore: We've found other ways, cattle blood.
Sam Winchester: You're telling me you're responsible for all the...
Lenore: It's not ideal. In fact, it's disgusting. But it allows us to get by.
Sam Winchester: Uh... okay, why?
Lenore: Survival. No deaths, no missing locals, no... reason for people like you to come looking for people like us. We blend in. Our kind is practically extinct. It turns out we weren't as high up the foodchain as we imagined.
Eli: [to Lenore] Why are we explaining ourselves to this killer? We choke on cow's blood so that none of them suffer. Tonight they murder Conrad and they celebrate it!
Lenore: Eli, that's enough!
Sam Winchester: Yeah Eli, that's enough.
Lenore: What's done is done. We're leaving this town tonight.
Sam Winchester: Then why did you bring me here? Why are you even talking to me?
Lenore: Believe me I'd rather not, but I know your kind. Once you have the scent, you'll keep tracking us. It doesn't matter where we go... hunters will find us.
Sam Winchester: So, you're asking us not to follow you?
Lenore: We have a right to live. We're not hurting anyone.
Sam Winchester: Right. So you keep saying. But give me one good reason why I should believe you.
Lenore: [leans in very close to Sam's face] Fine, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to let you go. Eli, take him back... not a mark on him.

"Supernatural: Goodbye Stranger (#8.17)" (2013)
Dean Winchester: Well, he puts the "ass" in "Cass," huh?
Sam Winchester: He's definitely off.
Dean Winchester: Off? He hasn't been right since he got back from purgatory. We still don't know how he got out of there.
Sam Winchester: I don't know, Dean. If he's so sketchy, then why were you praying to him?
Castiel: You know, I can hear you both. I am a celestial being.

Dean Winchester: What, now you trust Meg?
Meg: Hey, I got you this far.
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Shut up, Meg.

Sam Winchester: I'm fine.
Dean Winchester: No, you're not fine. You haven't been fine since the first trial. That's why I called Cas.
Meg: Trial?
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Shut up, Meg.

Meg: Wait, hold on. There's one part I don't understand. You hit a dog and stopped. Why?
Sam Winchester: That whole story... and *that's* your take away?

Dean Winchester: Listen, I may not be able to carry the burden that comes along with these trials. But, I can carry you.
Sam Winchester: You realize you kinda just quoted Lord of the Rings, right?
Dean Winchester: C'mon, man, that is- but it's the Rudy hobbit, alright? Rudy hobbit always gets a pass!
[Sam snickers]
Dean Winchester: Shut up.

Meg: Why are you so sweet on me, Clarence?
Castiel: I don't know. And I still don't know who Clarence is.
Meg: Would it kill you to watch a movie, read a book?
Castiel: A movie, no. But with a book with the proper spells - yeah, it could, theoretically, kill me.

Dean Winchester: [Cas, being controlled by Naomi, is beating the crap out of Dean so he can take the Angel tablet. He's forced Dean to his knees, broken and/or dislocated Dean's arm and is holding it while punching him repeatedly. Cas looks down at the tablet] You want it? Take it! But, you're gonna hafta kill me first. C'mon, you coward. Do it. Do it!
[Cas punches him more as we cut to Heaven with Naomi]
Castiel: *Please*
Naomi: *End* this, Castiel.
[Cut back to the crypt where Cas hits Dean again]
Dean Winchester: Cas... this isn't you. This isn't you!
[Cas keeps throwing punches as we cut to Heaven]
Naomi: Bring. Me. The. Tablet.
[Cut back to the crypt. Cas throws yet another punch]
Dean Winchester: Ahh!
[weak and bloodied, looking up at Cas, holding up his uninjured arm beseechingly]
Dean Winchester: Cas... Cas... I know you're in there. I know you can hear me. Cas. It's me.
[weaker, but not giving up]
Dean Winchester: We're family... We *need* you. *I* need you.
[Cut to Heaven]
Naomi: You have to choose, Castiel. Us. Or them.
[Cut to the crypt]
Dean Winchester: Cas...
[Cas drops his Angle blade and lets Dean's broken arm go. Dean almost collapses and grabs his broken right arm]
Dean Winchester: Ahhhh! Ah...
[Cas picks up the tablet. A blinding light shines and Cas is no longer in Heaven as Naomi's control over him is broken]
Naomi: Castiel! Castiel!
Dean Winchester: [Cas looks from the tablet in his hands to Dean, kneeling at his feet and barely conscious. He reaches for Dean] Cas... no...
[Cas reaches for his face]
Dean Winchester: Cas... Cas...?
[Dean tries to stop Cas with his other arm, but Cas places his hand on the side of Dean's face]
Dean Winchester: Ah-ahhh.
[And heals him]

Castiel: [bandaging Meg's wrist] These wounds have festered.
Meg: [winking at him] You really do know how to make a girl's nethers quiver, don't you?
Castiel: I am aware of how to do that.
Castiel: Although it doesn't usually involve cleaning wounds.
Meg: Why are you so sweet on me, Clarence?
Castiel: I don't know... And I still don't know who Clarence is.

Meg: So, your noodle's back in order?
Castiel: Yeah, my... noodle remembers everything. I think it's a pretty good noodle.
Meg: Really?
[with a suggestive look]
Meg: You remember everything?
Castiel: ...If you're referring to the Pizza Man... Yes, I remember the Pizza Man. And it's a good memory.

Meg: You ever miss the apocalypse?
Castiel: No, why would I miss the end of times?
Meg: I miss the simplicity. I was bad, you were good, life was easier. Now it's all so messy. I'm kinda good - which sucks - and you're kinda bad - which is actually all manner of hot!
[pause; Cas looks at her quizzically]
Meg: We survive this...
Meg: I'm gonna order some pizza and we're gonna move some furniture around, you understand?
Castiel: [shaking his head] No, I... I...
[pause; Meg raises her brows suggestively]
Castiel: Wait, actually... yes, I...
Dean Winchester: [abruptly walking into the room] Alright! Let's roll, campers!

Castiel: [Referring to the woman in curlers who was possessed by a demon] I'm hoping the strange-haired demon in the kitchen is more knowledgeable than the others I interrogated.

"Supernatural: 99 Problems (#5.17)" (2010)
Castiel: [Castiel appears in the motel room] I got your message. It was long your message. I find the sound of your voice grating.
Sam Winchester: What's wrong with you?
[Castiel stands wobbly]
Sam Winchester: Are you... drunk?
Castiel: No! Yes.
Sam Winchester: What the hell happened to you?
Castiel: I found a liquor store.
Sam Winchester: And?
Castiel: And I drank it!

Dean Winchester: [Dean arrives to the motel room with bloody hands] Paul's dead.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Jane shot him.
Castiel: It's starting.
Dean Winchester: What's starting? Where the hell you been?
Castiel: [shoots an angry glare at Dean] On a bender!
Dean Winchester: He's... did you say on a bender?
Sam Winchester: Yea. He's still pretty smashed.
Castiel: It is not of import.

Sam Winchester: No drinking, no gambling, no premarital sex. Dean, they basically just outlawed 90% of your personality.

Sam Winchester: Leah is not a real prophet.
Dean Winchester: Well, what is she, exactly?
Castiel: The whore.
Dean Winchester: Wow, Cas, tell us what you really think.

Castiel: It's starting.
Dean Winchester: That's starting,where the hell have you been?
Castiel: On a Bender.
Dean Winchester: Did he... Did you say on a bender?
Sam Winchester: Ya he's still pretty smashed.

Castiel: I got your message. It was long, your message. And I find the sound of your voice grating.
Sam Winchester: Whats wrong with you? Are you... drunk?
Castiel: No!... Yes.
Sam Winchester: What the Hell happened to you?
Castiel: I found a liquor store.
Sam Winchester: And?
Castiel: I drank it. Why'd you call me?
Sam Winchester: Whoa. There you go. Easy. You okay?
Castiel: Don't ask stupid questions.

Voicemail: You have reached the voice mailbox of...
Castiel: [heard on record] I don't understand... why does it want my name?

Castiel: She rises when Lucifer walks the earth. "And she shall come, bearing false prophecy." This creature has the power to take a human's form, read minds. Book of Revelation calls her "the Whore of Babylon."
Dean Winchester: Well thats catchy.

Castiel: The whore can only be killed by a true servant of heaven.
Dean Winchester: Servant like...
Castiel: Not you. Or me. Sam of course is an abomination. We'll have to find someone else.

Dean Winchester: What about the demons attacking the town?
Castiel: They're under her control.
Dean Winchester: And the ennochian exorcism?
Castiel: Fake. It actually means, "You... um... breed with the mouth of a goat."
[Sam and Dean give Castiel a weird look]
Castiel: It's funnier in ennochian.

Castiel: [Castiels' voice mail] I don't understand why, why do you want me to say my name?

"Supernatural: Everybody Loves a Clown (#2.2)" (2006)
Dean Winchester: Hello.
Sam Winchester: Hey man.
Dean Winchester: What's the matter, you sound like you just saw a clown.
Sam Winchester: Very funny. Skeleton actually.
Dean Winchester: Like a real human skeleton?
Sam Winchester: In the funhouse.

Sam Winchester: I mean this strong silence thing, it's crap. I'm over it.
Dean Winchester: Oh my god.
Sam Winchester: This isn't just anyone we're talking about, this is Dad. I know how you felt about the man.
Dean Winchester: You know what, just back off, okay? Just because I'm not sharing and caring like you want me to.
Sam Winchester: No-no-no. That's not what this is about, Dean. I don't care how you deal with this, but you have to deal with it man! Listen I'm your brother, I just want to make sure you're ok.
Dean Winchester: Dude, I'm okay! I'm okay, okay? I swear, the next person who asks me if I'm okay, I'm gonna start throwing punches. These are your issues, quit dumping them on me.
Sam Winchester: What are you talking about?
Dean Winchester: I just think it's really interesting, this sudden obedience you have to Dad. Its like, 'Oh, what would Dad want me to do?' Sam, you spent your entire life slugging it out with that man. I mean, hell, you picked a fight the last time you ever saw him. And now that he's dead, now you want to make it right. Well, I'm sorry Sam but you can't. It's too little, too late.
Sam Winchester: Why are you saying this to me?
Dean Winchester: Because I want you to be honest with yourself about this! I'm dealing with Dad's death! Are you?

Sam Winchester: I'm not ok... and neither are you.

Dean Winchester: Excuse me. We're looking for a Mr. Cooper. Have you seen him around?
Barry (Blind Man): What is that, some kind of joke?
[pulls sunglasses off]
Dean Winchester: Oh, I'm sorry.
Barry (Blind Man): Do you think I wouldn't give my eye-teeth to see Mr. Cooper or a sunset or anything at all?
Dean Winchester: [to Sam] Could you give me a little help here?
Sam Winchester: Not really.
Midget: Hey Barry, is there a problem?
Barry (Blind Man): Yeah, this guy hates blind people.
Dean Winchester: No, I don't.
Midget: Hey buddy, what's your problem?
Dean Winchester: Nothin', it's just a little misunderstanding.
Midget: Little? You SOB!
Sam Winchester: [Sam is unable to keep himself from laughing and starts cracking up]
Dean Winchester: N-n-n-n-no, I'm just... could somebody tell me where Mr. Cooper is? Please?

Sam Winchester: So, Cooper thinks I'm a peeping tom, but it's not him
Dean Winchester: Yeah, so I gathered. It's the blind guy. He's here somewhere.
Sam Winchester: Well, did you get the...
Dean Winchester: The brass blades? No, it's just been one of those days.

Dean Winchester: I know what you're thinking Sam. Why did it have to be clowns?
Sam Winchester: Oh, give me a break.
Dean Winchester: [laughs] You didn't think I remember, do you? Come on, you still bust out crying when you see Ronald McDonald on the television.
Sam Winchester: At least I'm not afraid of flying.
Dean Winchester: Planes crash!
Sam Winchester: And apparently clowns kill.

Sam Winchester: All right, Dean, it's just we've been at Bobby's for over a week now and you haven't brought up Dad once.
Dean Winchester: You know what, you're right. Come here, I want to lay my head gently on your shoulder. Maybe we can cry, hug, maybe even slow dance.

Sam Winchester: I mean, who'd finger a clown?

Sam Winchester: Well, before we go stabbing things into Cooper, we're gonna wanna make dame sure it's him.
Dean Winchester: You're such a stickler for details, Sammy.

Dean Winchester: You still bust out crying whenever you see Ronald McDonald on the television.
Sam Winchester: At least I'm not afraid of flying.
Dean Winchester: Planes crash!
Sam Winchester: And apparently clowns kill.

"Supernatural: Playthings (#2.11)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: [after Dean tells Sam about the next person who supposedly killed himself] Yeah I saw.
Dean Winchester: We gotta figure this out and fast. What did you find out about granny?
Sam Winchester: You're bossy.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: [says slowly] You're bossy... and short hahaha.
Dean Winchester: Are you drunk?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, so... stupid.
Dean Winchester: Dude what are you thinking, we're working a case.

Dean Winchester: Of course the most troubling question is why do these people keep assuming we're gay?
Sam Winchester: Well you are kind of butch they probably think you're compinsating.
Dean Winchester: Right.

Susan Thompson: Let me guess you guys are here antiquing.
Dean Winchester: How did you know?
Susan Thompson: You just look the type. So a Kingsize bed?
Sam Winchester: What no... ah no, no we're... two singles, we're just brothers.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Susan Thompson: Oh I'm so sorry.
Dean Winchester: What did you mean that we look the type?

Dean Winchester: [looking at a weird looking dress on the wall] Hahaha what the...?
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: That's normal. Why the hell would anyone stay here, I'm suprised they kept in business this long.

Dean Winchester: Hey are those antique dolls, coz this one, this one here he's got a major doll colection back home, Don't you huh?
[looks at Sam]
Sam Winchester: Big time.
Dean Winchester: Big time yeah, you think he could... ah we could come in and take a look, please I mean he loves them. He's not gonna tell you this but he's always dressing them up in these little tiny outfits, I mean you'd make his day she would huh?
Sam Winchester: It's true.

Dean Winchester: Alright time for bed, come on Sasquatch, come on.
Sam Winchester: I need you to watch out for me.
Dean Winchester: Yeah well, I always do.
Sam Winchester: No no no, you have to watch out for me alright and if I ever turn into something that I'm not, you have to kill me.
Dean Winchester: Sam.
Sam Winchester: Dean, Dad told you to do it, you have to.
Dean Winchester: Well Dad's an ass, he never should have said anything, you don't lay that kind of crap on your kids.
Sam Winchester: No, he was right to say it, who knows what I might become?

Dean Winchester: Ya' know she could be faking.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, what do you wanna do, poke her with a stick?
[Dean nods]
Sam Winchester: Dude, you're not gonna poke her with a stick!

Sam Winchester: That doesn't change what we talked about last night.
Dean Winchester: We talked about a lot of stuff last night.
Sam Winchester: You know what I mean.
Dean Winchester: You were wasted.
Sam Winchester: But you weren't and you promised.

Dean Winchester: You know there's a really good cure for a hangover. It's a greasy pork sandwich served up on a dirty ashtray.
Sam Winchester: [head over the toilet] Uh, I hate you.
Dean Winchester: I know you do.

Dean Winchester: Of course, the most troubling question is: "Why do these people assume we're gay?"
Sam Winchester: Well, you are kinda butch, but I just think you're overcompensating.

"Supernatural: Bad Day at Black Rock (#3.3)" (2007)
Dean Winchester: I'm Batman.
Sam Winchester: [sarcastically] Yeah, you're Batman.

Sam Winchester: I lost my shoe.

Dean Winchester: [looks at Sam] What?
Sam Winchester: I lost my shoe.

Dean Winchester: Is that a rabbit's foot?
Sam Winchester: I think it is.

Bobby Singer: [re: the rabbits foot] You see, you touch it, you own it. You own it, sure, you get a run of good luck to beat the devil. But you lose it, that luck turns. It turns so bad that you're dead inside a week.
Sam Winchester: Well, so I won't lose it, Bobby.
Bobby Singer: Everybody loses it!

Bobby Singer: Dean, great news. It wasn't easy, but I found a heavyweight cleansing ritual that should do the trick.
Dean Winchester: Bobby, that's uh, great, except Sam, uh... Sam lost the foot.
Bobby Singer: He what!
Dean Winchester: Bobby listen, listen, this uh, this hot chick stole it from him. I'm serious. She's in her mid-twenties, and she was sharp, you know. Good enough with the con to play us. And she only gave the guys she hired a name, probably an alias or something.
[turns to look at Sam]
Dean Winchester: Luigi or something...
Sam Winchester: Lagosi.
Dean Winchester: Right, Lagosi.
Bobby Singer: Lagosi? Lagosi... Aw crap, it's probably Bela.
Dean Winchester: Bela Lagosi? That's cute.

Bela Talbot: [tossing rabbits foot onto the fire] Thanks very much. I'm out one and a half million, and on the bad side of a very powerful, fairly psychotic buyer.
Dean Winchester: Wow... I really don't feel bad about that. Sam?
Sam Winchester: Nope. Not even a little.

Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: ...I lost my shoe...

Sam Winchester: The Air conditioner starts smoking when Sam is left in the motel room "Aw, come on! I - "

Sam Winchester: I lost my shoe.

"Supernatural: Asylum (#1.10)" (2005)
Sam Winchester: Dean. When are we gonna talk about it?
Dean Winchester: Talk about what?
Sam Winchester: About the fact that Dad's not here.
Dean Winchester: Oh, uh, let's see, never.
Sam Winchester: I'm being serious, man.
Dean Winchester: So am I, Sam. Look, he sent us here, he obviously wants us here. We'll just have to pick up the search later.
Sam Winchester: It doesn't matter what he wants!
Dean Winchester: See, that attitude, right there? That is why I always got the extra cookie.

Dean Winchester: You're not gonna try and kill me are you?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: Good, 'cuz that would be awkward.

Sam Winchester: [about the EMF] You gettin' any reading on that thing or not?
Dean Winchester: Nope. 'Course, doesn't mean nobody's home.
Sam Winchester: Spirits can appear at certain hours of the day.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, the freaks come out at night.

Sam Winchester: [on cell] No, Dad was in California last we heard from him. We just thought, he comes to you for munitions, maybe you see him the last few weeks. Just, call us if you hear anything. Thanks.
Dean Winchester: Caleb hasn't heard from him?
Sam Winchester: Nope. Neither has Jefferson or Pastor Jim. What about the journal? Any leads in there?
Dean Winchester: No, same last time I looked. Nothin' I can make out. I love the guy but I swear he writes like freakin' Yoda.

Katherine: So how do you guys know about all this ghost stuff?
Sam Winchester: It's kind of our job.
Katherine: Why would anyone want a job like that?
Sam Winchester: I had a crappy guidance counselor.

Sam Winchester: [pointing the shotgun at Dean] Dean. Step back from the door.
Dean Winchester: Sam, put the gun down.
Sam Winchester: Is that an order?
Dean Winchester: Nah, it's more of a friendly request.
Sam Winchester: 'Cause I'm gettin' pretty tired of takin' your orders.
Dean Winchester: I knew it. Ellicott did something to you, didn't he?
Sam Winchester: For once in your life? Just shut your mouth.
Dean Winchester: What're you gonna do Sam? Gun's filled with rock salt. Not gonna kill me.
[Sam fires, Dean falls to the floor]
Sam Winchester: No. But it'll hurt like hell.

Dean Winchester: [checking his cell] I don't believe it.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: It's a, a text message. It's coordinates.
Sam Winchester: You think Dad was texting us?
Dean Winchester: Well, he's given us coordinates before.
Sam Winchester: The man can barely work a *toaster*, Dean.

Sam Winchester: We've met some interesting people. Seen some interesting things.

Dean Winchester: You're not gonna try and kill me are ya?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: Good cos that would be awkward.

Sam Winchester: [about the asylum] The South Wing, it's where they housed all the real hard cases, the psychotics, the criminally insane...
Dean Winchester: Sounds cozy.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, and one night in '64, they rioted. Attacked staff, attacked each other.
Dean Winchester: So what, the patients took over the asylum?
Sam Winchester: Apparently.
Dean Winchester: Any deaths?
Sam Winchester: Some patients, some staff. I guess it was pretty gory, some of the bodies were never even recovered: including our chief of staff, Ellicott.
Dean Winchester: What do you mean never recovered?
Sam Winchester: Cops scoured every inch of the place, but I guess the patients must've... stuffed the body somewhere hidden.
Dean Winchester: Well that's grim.

"Supernatural: The End (#5.4)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: Thank you. Really. Thank you. I won't let you down.
Dean Winchester: Oh, I know it. I mean, you are the second-best hunter on the planet.

[Sam and Dean are talking on the phone]
Dean Winchester: We're not stronger when we're together, Sam. I think we're weaker. Because whatever we have between us, love, family, whatever it is- they are always going to use it against us... We're better off apart. We've got a better chance of dodging Lucifer and Michael and this whole damn thing, if we just go our own ways.
Sam Winchester: Dean, don't do this.
Dean Winchester: ...Bye, Sam.
[hangs up]

Sam Winchester: So, what do we do now?
Dean Winchester: We make our own future.

Lucifer: [after killing future Dean, turns around and sees past Dean] Oh. Hello Dean. Aren't you a surprise.
[lightning flashes, Lucifer pops up behind him]
Lucifer: You've come a long way to see this, haven't you?
Dean Winchester: Well go ahead. Kill me.
Lucifer: Kill you?
[glances around Dean at the body of future Dean]
Lucifer: Don't you think that would be a little... redundant?
Lucifer: I'm sorry. It must be painful. Speaking to me in this - shape. But it had to be your brother. It had to be.
[he reaches for Dean's shoulder, Dean pulls away, Lucifer's arm drops]
Lucifer: You don't have to be afraid of me, Dean. What do you think I'm going to do?
[walks past Dean, fingers a rose]
Dean Winchester: [angrily] I don't know, maybe deep-fry the planet?
Lucifer: [turning back] Why? Why would I want to destroy this stunning thing? *Beautiful* in a trillion different ways! The last, *perfect* handiwork of God?
Lucifer: You ever hear the story of how I fell from grace?
Dean Winchester: Oh good God, you're not gonna tell me a bedtime story are you? My stomach's almost outta bile.
Lucifer: You know why God cast me down? Because I *loved* him. More than anything. And then God created...
[huffs a small laugh]
Lucifer: You. The little, hairless apes. And then he asked all of us to bow down before *you*. To love *you*, more than Him! And I said, Father, I can't. I said these human beings, were flawed, murderous. And for that, God had Michael cast me into Hell! Now tell me, does the punishment fit the crime? Especially when I was right. Look what six billion of you have done to this thing. And how many of you blame me for it.
Dean Winchester: You're not fooling me, you know that? With this sympathy for the Devil crap? I know what you are.
Lucifer: What am I?
Dean Winchester: You're the same thing only bigger. The same brand of cockroach I been squashing my whole life. An ugly, evil, belly-to-the-ground supernatural piece of crap. The only difference between them and you? Is the size of your ego.
[pause, Lucifer smiles]
Lucifer: I like you, Dean. I get what the other angels see in you. Good-bye. We'll meet again soon.
[starts walking away]
Dean Winchester: [fiercely] You better kill me now!
Lucifer: [stops, turns back] Pardon?
Dean Winchester: You better kill me now! Or I swear, I will find a way to kill you! And I won't stop!
Lucifer: [quietly] I know you won't. I know you won't say yes to Michael either. And I know you won't kill Sam. Whatever you do, you will always end up... here. No matter what choices you make, whatever details you alter, *we* will always end up... here.
[a tear drops from Dean's eye]
Lucifer: I win. So I win.
Dean Winchester: You're wrong.
Lucifer: See you in five years, Dean.
[he vanishes with a clap of thunder]

Dean Winchester: What are you, stoned?
Castiel: Generally, yeah.

Dean Winchester: Amphetamines?
Castiel: It's the perfect antidote to that absinthe.

Dean Winchester: Oh well, if it isn't the ghost of Christmas Screw You.
Zachariah: Enough. Dean, enough. You saw it, right? You saw what happens. You're the only person who can prove the Devil wrong. Just say yes.
Dean Winchester: And how do I know that this whole thing isn't one of your tricks? Huh? Some angel hocus-pocus?
Zachariah: The time for tricks is over. Give yourself to Michael. Say yes, and we can strike. Before Lucifer gets to Sam. Before billions die.
[long pause, Dean walks around the angel]
Dean Winchester: [with his back turned] Nah.
Zachariah: "Nah"? You telling me you haven't learned you lesson?
Dean Winchester: [angrily] Oh I learned a lesson all right. Just not the one you wanted to teach!
Zachariah: [furious, advancing on Dean] Well, I'll just have to teach it *again*! 'Cause I've got you now, boy, and I'm never letting you -
[Zachariah is suddenly staring in shock at the empty air where Dean used to be]
Zachariah: Sonofa...
[Dean finds himself on a deserted road, turns to see Castiel regarding him calmly]
Dean Winchester: That's pretty nice timing, Cas.
Castiel: [smiling slightly] We had an appointment.
[Dean smiles, lays a hand on Cas' shoulder]
Dean Winchester: Don't ever change.

Dean Winchester: [on cell phone] Talking about the Colt, right? As in, *the* Colt?
Castiel: We are.
Dean Winchester: Well that doesn't make any sense, I mean, why would the demons keep a gun around that - kills demons?
Castiel: [shouting over a passing truck] What? What, Dean - I didn't, I didn't get that.
Dean Winchester: [laughing] Y'know it's kinda funny, talking to a messenger of God on a cell phone. It's, you know, like watching a Hell's Angel ride a moped.
Castiel: [irritated] This isn't funny, Dean! The voice says I'm almost out of minutes!
Dean Winchester: Okay, all right. Look, I, I'm tellin' you Cas, the mooks have melted down the gun by now.
Castiel: Well, I hear differently. And if it's true, and if you are still set on the *insane* task of killing the Devil, this is how we do it.
Dean Winchester: Okay, where do we start?
Castiel: Where are you now?
Dean Winchester: Uh, Kansas City...
[looks at his room key]
Dean Winchester: Century Hotel, room 113.
Castiel: I'll be there immediately.
[starts to hang up, Dean stops him]
Dean Winchester: Whoa whoa whoa, no, no, come on man, I just drove like sixteen hours straight, okay? I'm *human*. There's stuff I gotta do.
Castiel: What stuff?
Dean Winchester: Eat, for example; in this case sleep, I just need like four hours every once in a while, okay?
Castiel: Yes.
Dean Winchester: Okay, so you can pop in tomorrow morning.
Castiel: Yes.
[Dean hangs up]
Castiel: I'll just...
[hears the dial tone, hangs up, a little exasperated]
Castiel: ... wait here, then.

[On a cell phone]
Castiel: This isn't funny, Dean. The voice says I'm almost out of minutes.

Dean Winchester: What happened to you?
Castiel: Life.

"Supernatural: Dead Man's Blood (#1.20)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: Hey, there's salt over here. Right inside the door.
Dean Winchester: You mean like protection against demons salt? Or, uh, oops I spilled the popcorn salt?

Sam Winchester: Dad, we don't even know what these things are yet.
John Winchester: They were what Danny Elkins killed best... vampires.
Dean Winchester: Vampires? I thought there was no such thing.
Sam Winchester: You never even mentioned them, Dad.
John Winchester: I thought they were extinct. I thought Elkins and, and others had wiped them out. I was wrong. Most vampire lore is crap. A cross won't repel them, sunlight won't kill them, and neither will a stake to the heart. But the bloodlust, that part's true. They need fresh human blood to survive. They were once people, so you won't know it's a vampire until it's too late.

John Winchester: It was them all right. Looks like they're heading West. We're gonna have to double back to get around that detour.
Sam Winchester: How can you be so sure?
Dean Winchester: Sam...
Sam Winchester: I just wanna know we're goin' in the right direction!
John Winchester: We are.
Sam Winchester: How do you know?
[John pulls something from his pocket]
John Winchester: I found this.
[Dean takes it]
Dean Winchester: It's a... vampire fang.
John Winchester: No fangs - teeth. The second set descends when they attack.
[to Sam]
John Winchester: Any more questions? All right, let's get outta here, we're losin' daylight. Hey and Dean, why don't you touch up your car, before you get rust. I wouldn't have given you the damn thing if I thought you were gonna ruin it.

[John reads a letter Elkins left for him]
John Winchester: "If you're reading this, I'm already dead..." That sonofabitch.
Dean Winchester: What is it?
John Winchester: He had it the whole time!
Sam Winchester: Dad, what?
John Winchester: When you searched the place, did you, did you see a gun, an antique, a Colt revolver, did you see it?
Dean Winchester: Uh, there was, there was an old case, but it was empty.
John Winchester: They have it.
Dean Winchester: You mean whatever killed Elkins?
John Winchester: We gotta pick up the trail.
Sam Winchester: Wait, you want us to come with you?
John Winchester: If Elkins was tellin' the truth we gotta find this gun.
Sam Winchester: The gun, why?
John Winchester: Because it's important, that's why!

Dean Winchester: Vampires nest in groups of eight to ten, smaller packs are sent out to hunt for food. Victims are taken to the nest where the pack keeps them alive, bleeding them for days or weeks. Wonder if that's what happened to that 911 couple.
Sam Winchester: That's probably what Dad's thinkin'.
Sam Winchester: 'Course it'd be nice if he just *told* us what he thinks.
Dean Winchester: So it *is* starting.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Sam we been lookin' for Dad all year, now we're not with him for more than a couple hours and there's static already?
Sam Winchester: No. Look, I'm happy he's okay, all right, and I'm happy that we're all workin' together again.
Dean Winchester: Good.
Sam Winchester: It's just the way he treats us like we're children!
Dean Winchester: Oh God.
Sam Winchester: He, he barks orders at us, Dean! He expects us to follow him without question! He keeps us on some crap "need to know" deal!
Dean Winchester: Sam, he does what he does for a reason.
Sam Winchester: What reason?
Dean Winchester: Our job! There's no time to argue, there's no margin for error! All right, it's just the way the old man runs things.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, well maybe that worked when we were kids, but not anymore, all right? Not after everything you and I have been through, Dean. I mean are you tellin' me you're cool with just followin' the line and lettin' him run the whole show?
[Dean hesitates]
Dean Winchester: If that's what it takes.

John Winchester: Get back in the car.
Sam Winchester: No.
John Winchester: I said get back in the damn car!
Sam Winchester: Yeah, and I said no!
Dean Winchester: All right, you made your point tough guy. Look, we're all tired, we can talk about this later.
[grabbing Sam]
Dean Winchester: Sammy I mean it, come on.
Sam Winchester: [under his breath] This is why I left in the first place.
John Winchester: [dangerous] What'd you say?
Sam Winchester: You heard me!
John Winchester: [angry] Yeah. You left! Your brother and me, we needed you. You walked away, Sam, you walked away!
Dean Winchester: Stop it, both of you!
Sam Winchester: [increasingly belligerent] You're the one who said don't come back, Dad. You were the one who closed that door, not me! You were just pissed off you couldn't control me anymore!
[they grapple; Dean shoves between them]
Dean Winchester: Listen, stop it, stop it, STOP IT! That's enough!
[to John]
Dean Winchester: That means you too.

John Winchester: So... You boys really wanna know about this Colt?
Sam Winchester: Yes sir.
John Winchester: It's just a story. A legend, really. Well, I thought it was. Never really believed it until I read Daniel's letter. Back in 1835, when Haley's Comet was overhead, the same night those men died at the Alamo, they say Samuel Colt made a gun. A special gun. He made it for a hunter, a man like us, only on horseback. The story goes, he made thirteen bullets. This hunter, he used the gun a half-dozen times before he disappeared, the gun along with him. 'Til somehow Daniel got his hands on it. They say... they say this gun can kill anything.
Dean Winchester: Kill anything, like supernatural anything?
Sam Winchester: Like the demon.
John Winchester: Yeah, the demon. Ever since I picked up its trail, I been lookin' for a way to destroy that thing. Find the gun, we may have it.

John Winchester: I don't think I ever told you this, but... the day you were born, you know what I did?
Sam Winchester: No.
John Winchester: I put a hundred bucks into a savings account for you. I did the same thing for your brother. It was a college fund. And every month I'd put in another hundred dollars. Until... Anyway, my point is, Sam, that, this is never the life that I wanted for you.
Sam Winchester: Then why'd you get so mad that I left?
John Winchester: You gotta understand somethin'. After your mother passed, all I saw was evil. Everywhere. And all I cared about was, was keepin' you boys alive. I wanted you prepared. Ready. So somewhere along the line I uh, I stopped being your father, and I, I became your, your drill-sergeant. So when you said that you wanted to go away to school, all I could think about, my only thought was, that you were gonna be alone. Vulnerable. Sammy it just, it never occurred to me what you wanted. I just couldn't accept the fact that you and me... we're just different.
[Sam laughs]
John Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: We're not different. Not anymore. With what happened to Mom and Jess... hell we probably have a lot more in common than just about anyone.
John Winchester: I guess you're right, son.
Sam Winchester: Hey Dad... whatever happened to that college fund?
John Winchester: Spent it on ammo.
[they laugh]

Sam Winchester: But after, we're gonna meet up, right? Use the gun *together*, right?
Sam Winchester: You're leaving again, aren't you? You *still* wanna go after the demon alone? You know, I don't get you. You can't treat us like this.
John Winchester: Like what?
Sam Winchester: Like children!
John Winchester: You *are* my children. I'm tryin' to keep you safe.
Dean Winchester: Dad, all due respect but uh, that's a bunch of crap.
[Sam and John look at him in surprise]
John Winchester: Excuse me?
Dean Winchester: You know what Sammy and I have been huntin'. Hell, you sent us on a few huntin' trips yourself. I mean you can't be that worried about keepin' us safe.
John Winchester: It's not the same thing, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Then what is it? Why do you want us outta the big fight?
John Winchester: This demon? It's a bad sonofabitch. I can't make the same moves if I'm worried about keepin' you alive.
Dean Winchester: You mean you can't be as reckless.
John Winchester: Look. I don't expect to make it outta this fight in one piece. Your mother's death? It almost killed me. I can't watch my children die too. I won't.
Dean Winchester: What happens if you die? Dad, what happens if you die and we could've done something about it? You know I been thinkin', I think maybe Sammy's right about this one, I think we should do this together. We're stronger as a family, Dad, we just are, you know it.
John Winchester: We're runnin' outta time. You do your job and you get outta the area. That's an order.

John Winchester: So boys.
Sam Winchester: Yes sir.
John Winchester: You ignored a direct order back there.
Sam Winchester: Yes sir.
Dean Winchester: Yeah but we saved your ass.
[heavy pause]
Dean Winchester: You're right.
Dean Winchester: I am?
John Winchester: It scares the hell outta me. You two are all I've got. But I guess we are stronger as a family. So, we go after this damn thing. Together.
Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester: Yes sir.

"Supernatural: Are You There, God? It's Me, Dean Winchester (#4.2)" (2008)
Bobby Singer: Solid iron. Completely coated in salt. One hundred percent ghost-proof.
Sam Winchester: You built a panic room?
Bobby Singer: I had a weekend off.

Dean Winchester: I'm trying to come up with a theory here, okay? Work with me.
Sam Winchester: Dean, we have a theory.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, one with a little less fairy dust on it, please.

Dean Winchester: See, this is why I can't get behind God.
Sam Winchester: What are you talking about?
Dean Winchester: If He doesn't exist, fine. Bad crap happens to good people. That's how it is. And no rhyme or reason, just random horrible, evil. I get it. Okay? I can roll with that. But if He is out there, what's wrong with Him? Where the hell is He while all these decent people are getting torn to shreds? How does He live with Himself? You know, why doesn't He help?
[long pause]
Bobby Singer: I ain't touching this one with a ten-foot pole.

Dean Winchester: I mean, I don't like gettin' singled out at birthday parties, much less by God.
Sam Winchester: Okay, well, too bad, Dean. Because I think He wants you to strap on your party hat.

Bobby Singer: Solid iron, completely coated in salt. One hundred percent ghost proof.
Sam Winchester: You built a panic room?
Bobby Singer: ...I had a weekend off.
Dean Winchester: Bobby.
Bobby Singer: What?
Dean Winchester: You're awesome.

Sam Winchester: [On a supply run. Sighing heavily while on the phone with Dean] Yes, Dean, I'll get chips.
[pause, then rolls his eyes]
Sam Winchester: Dude. When have I ever forgotten pie?

Dean Winchester: [Rummaging through the grocery bag that Sam brought back from his supply run] Dude?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [Worried, looks Sam in the eye] Where's the pie?

Sam Winchester: [In Bobby's panic room] Bobby, is this...
Bobby Singer: Solid iron. Completely coated in salt. One hundred percent ghost proof.
Sam Winchester: You built a panic room?
Bobby Singer: I had a weekend off.

Castiel: The rising of the witnesses is one of the 66 seals.
Dean Winchester: Okay, I'm guessing that's not a show at Sea World.
Castiel: Those seals are being broken by Lilith.
Dean Winchester: She did the spell. She rose the witnesses.
Castiel: Mm-hmm. And not just here. Twenty other hunters are dead.
Dean Winchester: [understanding] Of course. She picked victims that the hunters couldn't save so that they would barrel right after us.
Castiel: Lilith has a certain sense of humor.
Dean Winchester: Well, we put those spirits back to rest.
Castiel: It doesn't matter. The seal was broken.
Dean Winchester: Why break the seal anyway?
Castiel: You think of the seals as locks on a door.
Dean Winchester: Okay, last one opens and...
Castiel: Lucifer walks free.
Dean Winchester: [stares, stunned] Lucifer? But I thought Lucifer was just a story they told. At demon Sunday school. There's no such thing.
Castiel: Three days ago, you thought there was no such thing as me. Why do you think we're here walking among you now for the first time in 2,000 years?
Dean Winchester: [quietly] To stop Lucifer.
Castiel: [nods] That's why we've arrived.
Dean Winchester: Well, bang-up job so far. Stellar work with the witnesses. That's nice.
Castiel: We tried. There are other battles, other seals. Some we'll win, some we'll lose. This one we lost.
[Dean snorts derisively. Castiel moves closer to him]
Castiel: Our numbers are not unlimited. Six of my brothers died in the field this week. You think the armies of heaven should just follow you around? There's a bigger picture here.
[leans in even closer; Dean looks uncomfortable. With intensity:]
Castiel: You should show me some respect. I dragged you out of hell. I can throw you back in.
[he disappears]

Dean Winchester: I thought angels were supposed to be guardians. Fluffy wings, halos - you know, Michael Landon. Not dicks.
Castiel: Read the Bible. Angels are warriors of God. I'm a soldier.

"Supernatural: Like a Virgin (#6.12)" (2011)
Sam Winchester: So what likes gold and virgins?
Dean Winchester: P. Diddy?

Sam Winchester: Sorry, I would hug you, but...
Castiel: It would be awkward.

Dean Winchester: Whaddya got?
Sam Winchester: Well, looks like those other two missing girls both baked cookies for the Lord.
Dean Winchester: What is that? Code?
Sam Winchester: No. Church choir, bake sales, uh, promise ring clubs. The works. They were good girls. But, Penny wasn't even a Christian, so I...
Dean Winchester: I've got another theory.
[He pulls a small book out of his jacket]
Dean Winchester: Penny's diary.
Sam Winchester: Did you steal that from her room?
Dean Winchester: [smiles at Sam, happy his soul is back] I love that you even ask me that.

Sam Winchester: You mean, you think they're all...
Dean Winchester: Virgins, Sam. Virgins.
Sam Winchester: Penny was 22.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, with a pink room.
Sam Winchester: So?
Dean Winchester: And stuffed teddy bears.
Sam Winchester: But, you really think...
Dean Winchester: [Holding up a finger, he reads softly from Penny's diary] I've decided. I'm going to give Stan my most precious gift.
Sam Winchester: Wow, that... sounded really creepy coming outta your mouth.
Dean Winchester: I think I delivered it.

Sam Winchester: Who would want virgins?
Dean Winchester: You got me. I prefer ladies with experience.
[With a nod and a cheesy grin]

Sam Winchester: [Referring to the latest victim who survived] So, what, you think Batman tried to rape her?
Dean Winchester: Well, he does carry a lot of rage. But, he rejected her because she was already dehymenated. Huh?
Sam Winchester: You think?
Dean Winchester: I think it just goes to show that being easy is pretty much all upside.

Sam Winchester: Ya know, it's comforting.
Dean Winchester: What's that?
Sam Winchester: I die for a year, came back - and you're *still* not funny.
Dean Winchester: Shut up! I'm hilarious.

Sam Winchester: [referring to the bag of gold recovered from the dragon's lair] Why don't you just cut to the chase and roll in it?
Dean Winchester: I rarely have wealth.

Sam Winchester: You know, I kinda feel like I got slipped the worst mickey of all time, and I woke up to find out that I had burnt the whole city down. And, you can say it wasn't me, but... I'm the one with the zippo in my pocket. Ya know? So, I'm not sure it's that cut and dry. And, okay, I appreciate you tryin' to protect me, I really do. But I gotta fix... what I gotta fix. So, I need to know what I did.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, but you don't know how dangerous that could be.
Sam Winchester: What would you do?
[Dean looks down, unable to answer truthfully]
Sam Winchester: Right. Same thing.

Castiel: I'm sorry, Dean, but I warned you not to put that thing back inside him.
Dean Winchester: What was I supposed to do? Let T1000 walk around? Hope he doesn't open fire!

"Supernatural: Born Under a Bad Sign (#2.14)" (2007)
[Dean chuckles]
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Nothing.
Sam Winchester: Dean. What?
Dean Winchester: Dude you... You like full on had a girl inside you for like a whole week.
[Dean chuckles]
Dean Winchester: It's pretty naughty.

Sam Winchester: [possessed by demon] Hell is like, well, it's hell.

Sam Winchester: My daddy shot your daddy in the head.

Sam Winchester: Dean... back from the dead. Getting to be a regular thing for you, isn't it? Like a cockroach.

[Sam wants Dean to shot him so he won't kill anyone else]
Dean Winchester: You know, I've fought so hard to keep you safe.
Sam Winchester: I know.
Dean Winchester: I can't. I'd rather die.

Sam Winchester: Dean, back from the dead. Getting to be a regular thing for you, isn't it? Like a cockroach.
Dean Winchester: How bout I smack that smartass right out of your mouth?
Sam Winchester: Oh, careful now... wouldn't want to bruise this fine packaging

Sam Winchester: You really think that's what this is about? The Master plan? I don't give a rat's ass about the Master plan.

Sam Winchester: To Jo: My daddy shot your daddy in the head.

[Sam was possessed by a demon who was torturing Dean by punching him, grinding his fingers into his gunshot wound and taunting him about his grief over the loss of their father and his fear of not being able to save Sam. Dean and Bobby have just exorcised Sam of the demon]
Dean Winchester: [In pain and exhausted] Sammy?
Sam Winchester: Did I miss anything?
[Dean uses all the strength he has left to punch Sam, then falls over]

Bobby Singer: Here. Take these.
Sam Winchester: What are they?
Bobby Singer: Charms. They'll fend off possession. That demon's still out there. This'll stop it from gettin' back up in ya.
Dean Winchester: That sounds vaguely dirty, but thanks.

"Supernatural: Houses of the Holy (#2.13)" (2007)
Dean Winchester: There's tons of stuff on unicorns to, in fact I've heard they ride on silver moon beams and shoot rainbows out of their ass.
Sam Winchester: Wait, there's no such thing as unicorns?

Dean Winchester: [on the vibrating bed] Hey. Man, you gotta try this, I mean there really is magic in the Magic Fingers.
Sam Winchester: Dean, you're enjoying that way too much, it's kind of making me uncomfortable.

Dean Winchester: Well, I think I learned a valuable lesson: Always take down your Christmas decorations after New Year's, or you might get filleted by a hooker from God.
Sam Winchester: I'm laughing on the inside.

Dean Winchester: [Dean's out of money for the vibrating bed] Did you bring quarters?
Sam Winchester: Dude, I'm not enabling your sick habit. You're like one of those lab rats that pushes the pleasure button instead of the food button until it dies.
Dean Winchester: What are you talking about? I eat.

Dean Winchester: So. What makes you think you saw an, uh, angel?
Sam Winchester: It just, it appeared before me and I just, this feeling washed over me, you know? Like, like peace. Like grace.
Dean Winchester: Okay, Ecstasy Boy, maybe we'll get you some glowsticks and a nice Dr. Seuss hat, huh?

Dean Winchester: Okay, all right. You know what? I get it. You've got faith. That's - hey, good for you. I'm sure it makes things easier. I'll tell you who else had faith like that. Mom. She used to tell me when she tucked me in that angels were watching over us. In fact, that was the last thing she ever said to me.
Sam Winchester: You never told me that.
Dean Winchester: Well, what's to tell? She was wrong. There was nothing protecting her. There's no higher power, there's no God. I mean, there's just chaos, and violence, and random unpredictable evil that comes out of nowhere and rips you to shreds. You want me to believe in this stuff? I'm going to need to see some hard proof. You got any?

Sam Winchester: [about the supplies for a séance] Dude. I'll admit we've gone pretty ghetto with spellwork before, but this takes the cake. I mean, a Spongebob placemat instead of an altar cloth?
Dean Winchester: We'll just put it Spongebob side down.

Father Reynolds: What are you doing? What is this?
Sam Winchester: Uh, Father, please. I can explain. Um... Actually, maybe I can't. This is a - a séance.
Father Reynolds: A séance? Young man, you are in the House of God.
Sam Winchester: [Apologetic] It's based on early Christian rites, if that helps any.

Sam Winchester: I don't know, Dean, I just... I wanted to believe, so badly. It's so damn hard to do this, what we do. All alone, you know? There's so much evil out there in the world, Dean, I feel like I could drown in it. And when I think about my destiny, when I think about how I could end up...
Dean Winchester: Yeah, well, don't worry about that, alright? I'm watching out for you.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I know you are. But you're just one person, Dean. And I needed to think that there was something else watching too, you know? Some higher power. Some greater good. And that maybe...
Dean Winchester: Maybe what?
Sam Winchester: Maybe I could be saved.

"Supernatural: Long Distance Call (#3.14)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: So you two were talking a case?
Dean Winchester: No we were talking about our feelings, and then our favorite boy bands. Yeah, we were talking a case!

Sam Winchester: I mean, Dad? Do you really think it was Dad?
Dean Winchester: I don't know. Maybe.
Sam Winchester: Well, what did he sound like?
Dean Winchester: Like Oprah!

Dean Winchester: What happens if it really is Dad? What if he calls back?
Sam Winchester: What do you mean?
Dean Winchester: What do I say?
Sam Winchester: Hello?
Dean Winchester: Hello? That's what you come back with? Hello.

Dean Winchester: Find anything?
Sam Winchester: After 3 hours, I have found no reason why anything supernatural will be going on here.
Dean Winchester: Wow, you know. You'd think a Stanford education and a high school hookup rate of 0.0 would produce better results than that.
Sam Winchester: Hilarious.
Dean Winchester: Sam, you've been looking at the wrong places pal.
Sam Winchester: Then what are the right places Dean?
Dean Winchester: Motel pamphlet rack. Milan, Ohio. Birth place of Thomas Edison.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, so what?
Dean Winchester: Keep reading.
Sam Winchester: [opens and reads the pamphlet; looks up at Dean, amused] You're kidding.

Dean Winchester: I see they improved your face.
Sam Winchester: Right back at 'cha.

Sam Winchester: It's a Crocotta.
Dean Winchester: What's that? Some kind of sandwich?

Dean Winchester: I can't expect dad to show up with some miracle at the last minute... I can't expect anybody to, y'know? The only person who can get me out of this thing is me.
Sam Winchester: [long silence] And me...
Dean Winchester: [long silence] And me?
[looks quizically at Sam]
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Deep revelation... havin' a real moment here, that's what yo- that's what you come back with? And me?
Sam Winchester: Do you want a poem?
Dean Winchester: Moment's gone...
[turns on T.V, hands Sam a beer]
Dean Winchester: ...unbelieveable.
[Both drink]

Sam Winchester: Dean, I wanna believe this man. I really do...
Dean Winchester: Then believe it. If we get this sucker, it's Miller Time.

Dean Winchester: I gave you a helluva time on this one.
Sam Winchester: Nah.
Dean Winchester: No, you were right.
Sam Winchester: Forget about it.
Dean Winchester: I can't. I wanted to believe so badly that there was a way out of this. I mean, I'm- I'm staring down the barrel at this thing. You know. Hell. For real, forever, and uh, uh, I'm just...
Sam Winchester: [softly] Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [swallowing hard] I'm scared, Sam. I'm really scared.
Sam Winchester: I know.
Dean Winchester: I guess I was willing to believe anything. You know, last act of a desperate man.
Sam Winchester: There's nothing wrong with having hope, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Ah, hope doesn't get you jack squat. I can't expect Dad to show up with some miracle at the last minute. I can't expect anybody to, ya know? The only person who can get me outta this thing is me.
Sam Winchester: [after a meaningful look at Dean] And me.
Dean Winchester: [long silence] And me?
Sam Winchester: Wh- What?
Dean Winchester: Deep revelation. Having a real moment here, th- that's what you come back with? And me?
Sam Winchester: Do you want a poem?
Dean Winchester: Moment's gone.
[turns on TV. They both smile]
Dean Winchester: Unbelievable.
[Dean gets them each a beer and they watch TV]

"Supernatural: Pac-Man Fever (#8.20)" (2013)
Charlie Bradbury: I also found these series of books by Carver Edlund. Did those books really happen? Wow. That is some meta-madness. Thanks for saving the world and stuff. Sorry you have zero luck with the ladies.
Sam Winchester: Wha...
Sam Winchester: [to Dean] We need to find every single of those books and burn them.
Charlie Bradbury: They're online now, so good luck with that.

Dean Winchester: [Seeing Sam after just getting up with a serious case of bed head] I'm tellin' you, give me 5 minutes with some clippers, and...
Sam Winchester: Oh, shut up.

Sam Winchester: What time did I lay down?
Dean Winchester: You took a siesta around noon... yesterday.
[He tosses Sam a beer which sails right passed him as he watches and breaks on the floor]
Sam Winchester: [Very slow as he looks back at the broken beer bottle and beer all over the floor then back to Dean] I'm sorry. Uh...
Dean Winchester: That's why we don't have nice things, Sam.

Sam Winchester: [Looking at an email that just came in] It's from Charlie. In the neighborhood, found you guys a case. Found us a case?
Dean Winchester: In the neighborhood? How the hell she know where we are?
Sam Winchester: Uhhh... Well, she doesn't. Not exactly at least. It says she tracked our cells to a 20 mile radius then the signal went out.
[Gives Dean a surprised and impressed look]
Sam Winchester: Huh. This place must be in some kind of, like, Bermuda Triangle.
Dean Winchester: What, you're sayin' that we can make or receive phone calls from here and no one can track us?
[Reverently, looking around him]
Dean Winchester: Man, I love this place.

Dean Winchester: [Worried for Sam] I know you wanna help. I do. Alright? But...
Sam Winchester: Dean. You cannot take care of the both of us. I *need* to be out here. Play through the pain. Right?
Dean Winchester: C'mon, man, don't quote me to me!

Charlie Bradbury: So... the boys said they noticed something on the body's arm before it covered them in years of future therapy. Said it looked like a blue hand print.
Dean Winchester: [to Sam] Sounds like something you should read about. In a book. At home.
Sam Winchester: I'm not leaving until we find out whatever's doing this.
Dean Winchester: Whatever.
[Turns and walks away]
Charlie Bradbury: You guys fight like an old married couple.

Charlie Bradbury: [Sees Dean is pulling away in the Impala] Is he leaving? He's leaving.
Sam Winchester: It's alright. I stole your car. I think I know where he's going. C'mon.
Charlie Bradbury: Cool.
[Realization dawns]
Charlie Bradbury: Wait, you stole my car?

Sam Winchester: [He and Charlie are waiting and watching Dean break into the morgue. Dean turns and jumps when he sees them already inside] What took you so long?
Dean Winchester: I stopped for gas.
[At Sam's raised eyebrows... ]
Dean Winchester: Shut up!

Sam Winchester: [Dean enters the bunker after the close of the case and heads straight for Sam in the library. At the sober look on Dean's face, Sam stands up to face him] Okay, look, you were right. I shoulda laid low, I, I know. I shoulda hung back. But, I'm glad I was able-
[He stops short, shocked, as Dean grabs him in a bear hug]

"Supernatural: Clap Your Hands If You Believe (#6.9)" (2010)
Sam Winchester: Talk to me. What happened?
Dean Winchester: Well, uh... There was this, uh... God help me, Sam, there was this bright white light.
Sam Winchester: It's okay. Safe room.
Dean Winchester: And then - and suddenly, I was, uh... I w- I was in a different place. And there were these beings. And they - they were - they were too bright to look at. But I-I could feel them pulling me toward this sort of... table.
Sam Winchester: Probing table!
Dean Winchester: God, don't say that out loud!
Sam Winchester: Right. Uh, so what did you do?
Dean Winchester: I went... crazy. I started hacking and slashing and slashing and firing. They - they actually seemed surprised. I-I-I don't think anybody's ever done that before. Yeah. I had a close encounter, Sam. And I won.
Sam Winchester: You should take a shower.
Dean Winchester: I *should* take a shower. I gonna - I gonna take a shower now.

Dean Winchester: [into a phone while running from a light] Holy sh...! UFO! UFO!
Sam Winchester: [into his phone] Whoa, dude, stop yelling. You're breaking up. I didn't catch that last part.
Dean Winchester: Close encounter! Close encounter!
Sam Winchester: Close encounter? What kind? First, second?
Dean Winchester: They're after me!
Sam Winchester: Third kind already? You better run, man. I think the fourth kind's a butt thing.
Dean Winchester: Empathy, Sam! Empathy!

Dean Winchester: Ok. Alright. But until we get you back on the soul train, I'll be your conscious. Ok?
Sam Winchester: So your saying... you'll be my... Jiminy Cricket.
Dean Winchester: [pause] Shut up. But yeah, you freaking puppet. That's exactly what I'm saying.

Dean Winchester: Do not engage with, maim, or in any way kill Brennan. In fact I don't want you making any judgement calls whatsoever. If anything comes us, call me.
Sam Winchester: You know Jiminey I was on my own for a whole year. I did fine without you.
Dean Winchester: Yea, i dont wanna know your definition of fine.

Sam Winchester: My brother was abducted by aliens, I'm pretty good on the proof part.
Sparrow Jennings: Your brother was abducted by aliens?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Sparrow Jennings: Oh my god!
Sam Winchester: It's ok, I've had time to adjust.
Sparrow Jennings: Did it happen when you were kids?
Sam Winchester: No, like, a half hour ago.

Dean Winchester: Why are the fairies abducting people?
Marion: Hmmm... There is much theory and little fact. We know they only take first-born sons... like Rumpelstiltskin did. Personally, *I* think they're taken to Avalon to service Oberon, King of the Fairy.
Sam Winchester: Dean? Did... you *service* Oberon, King of the Fairies?

Dean Winchester: [Awkwardly initiating small talk in Marion's home] I gotta say, I love the feel. Uh, it's uh... it's...
Sam Winchester: Like Sedona Arizona crapped in here.

[while trying to banish the fairies to their realm, the Leprechaun, previously disguised as a UFO nut, appears and kills Brennan]
The Leprechaun: Sorry about the mess, but your friend here went back on his deal.
Sam: Well, you weren't very clear with him on the terms.
The Leprechaun: I told him there was a price. Once we come, we come to stay.
Sam: So you take firstborns and then what? You just sit back and watch while they cover the abductions for you with all that crazy UFO crap? Which you help encourage, naturally. Nice con. But, your cover's blown now, Wayne.
The Leprechaun: Blown? To whom? Brennan's dead. Your brother?
The Leprechaun: He's marked... been to the ranch. He's ours now.
Sam: Yeah... well, then there's me.
The Leprechaun: You? But you can only see me if I let you.
Sam: True, but you'll have to get near me eventually, and I have very good reflexes.
[the Leprechaun reappears]
The Leprechaun: You're not like the rest of them, are you?
Sam: Nope.
The Leprechaun: I could see that right off. You're missing a certain piece, right in the center, ain't you?
Sam: Says who?
The Leprechaun: We fairy folk, we're all about energy. And the human soul gives off a certain perfume. Your soul is far away. But not completely out of reach.
Sam: Is that so?
The Leprechaun: Sam, I can get it back for you... for a price.
Sam: That's adorable. It's locked in a box with the devil.
The Leprechaun: *Your* devil, not mine.
Sam: There's no freaking way a leprechaun can do what angels cannot.
The Leprechaun: Angels?
The Leprechaun: Please. I'm talking about real magic, sonny. From my side of the fence. Got a way of getting in back doors.
Sam: So you're my blue fairy? You can make me a real boy again?
The Leprechaun: When you wish upon a star.
Sam: Yeah, I got a wish.
[shoots the Leprechaun with an iron bullet]
The Leprechaun: [winces in pain, but immediately straightens up] Iron! Painful, but not a deal breaker.

Sam Winchester: Hey, you're the one who pizza rolled Tinkerbell. I'm just doing the math.

"Supernatural: Red Sky at Morning (#3.6)" (2007)
Dean Winchester: [about Bela] Can I shoot her?
Sam Winchester: Not in public.

Dean Winchester: [to Sam about Gert] What a crazy old broad.
Sam Winchester: Why, because she believes in ghosts?
Dean Winchester: Haha, look at ya, stickin' up for ya girlfriend, you cougar hound.
Sam Winchester: Bite me
Dean Winchester: Not if she bites ya first

Sam Winchester: How do you sleep at night?
Bela Talbot: In silk sheets, rolling naked in money.

Dean Winchester: So, I've been waiting since Maple Springs. You got something to tell me?
Sam Winchester: It's not your birthday...
Dean Winchester: No.
Sam Winchester: [thinks hard] ...Happy Purim?

Dean Winchester: [driving] So I've been waiting since Maple Springs. You got something to tell me?
Sam Winchester: [confused] It's not your birthday...
Dean Winchester: No.
Sam Winchester: Happy Purim? Dude, I don't know, I have no idea what you're talking about.
Dean Winchester: There's a bullet missing from the Colt. Wanna tell me how that happened?
[Sam shakes his head]
Dean Winchester: I know it wasn't me, so unless you were shooting at some incredibly evil cans...

Dean Winchester: [angry] You went after it, didn't you? The crossroads demon, after I told you not to.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, well...
Dean Winchester: you coulda gotten yourself killed.
Sam Winchester: I didn't.
Dean Winchester: And you shot her?
Sam Winchester: She was a smartass!

Dean Winchester: So what happens? You see the ship, and then a few hours later you pucker up and kiss your ass goodbye?
Sam Winchester: Basically.

Sam Winchester: I gotta ID the boat.
Dean Winchester: Shouldn't be too hard, how many three mast clipper ships are wrecked off the coast?
Sam Winchester: [smiles] I checked that too, actually. Over one hundred and fifty.
Dean Winchester: Wow.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: Crap.
Sam Winchester: Mmmhmm.

Bela Talbot: Really Sam... I expect the attitude from him, but from you...
Sam Winchester: [stares at her] You shot me!

"Supernatural: Monster Movie (#4.5)" (2008)
Dean Winchester: Well, look at me. I mean, I came back from the furnace without any of my old scars, right? No bullet wounds, knife cuts, none of the off-angle fingers from all of the breaks - I mean, my hide is as smooth as a baby's bottom. Which leads me to conclude, sadly, that my virginity is intact.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: I've been re-hymenated.
Sam Winchester: Re - Please. Dean, maybe angels can pull you out of hell, but no one could do that.
Dean Winchester: Brother! I have been re-hymenated. And the dude will not abide!

Dean Winchester: We still gotta see the new "Raiders" movie.
Sam Winchester: I saw it.
Dean Winchester: Without me?
Sam Winchester: You were in hell.
Dean Winchester: That's no excuse.
[Sees a vendor selling soft pretzels]
Dean Winchester: Big pretzel!
[Hurries over to buy a couple. Sam smiles and shakes his head fondly]

Dean Winchester: I, uh, pulled it off during the fight. Look at the label on the ribbon.
Sam Winchester: It's a costume rental.
Dean Winchester: All three monsters - the Dracula, Wolf Man, and the Mummy - all the same critter, which means we need to catch this freak before he "Creature from the Black Lagoon's" somebody.
Jamie: So, you guys are like Mulder and Scully or something, and the X-Files are real?
Dean Winchester: No, "The X-Files" is a TV show. This is real.

Sam Winchester: [tries to tear out Ed's ear] It's supposed to come off.
Ed Brewer: No, it's not!

Sam Winchester: This is stupid!

Sam Winchester: We're looking for Ed Brewer.
Jamie: What do you want with Ed?
Dean Winchester: Well, we are uh... federal agents.
[They pull out and show her their IDs]
Dean Winchester: Mr. Brewer was witness to a serious crime. We just need to...
Jamie: Wait a minute.
[to Dean, surprised]
Jamie: You're a Fed? Wow, you don't come on like a Fed.
Jamie: Seriously?
Dean Winchester: [Moving closer, suggestively] I'm a maverick, really. A rebel with a badge. One thing I don't play by? The rules.
[He winks at her]

Dean Winchester: C'mon Sammy. It's Octoberfest. Beer and bar wenches.
Sam Winchester: Pretty sure women don't react well today to that bar wench thing.
Dean Winchester: Hey, bar wench! How's that beer coming?
Jamie: Coming up, good sir!
Dean Winchester: [With a huge grin at Sam] Octoberfest!

Sam Winchester: [smiling at Dean's outfit after releasing him from Dracula's electrocution table] Hey there, Hansel.
Dean Winchester: Shut up!
[Sam smirks at Dean. Dean points his finger at Sam]

Dean Winchester: It feels good to be back on the job, doesn't it? Hero gets the girl; monster gets the gank. A happy ending.
Dean Winchester: Complete with happy ending.
Sam Winchester: Classy, Dean.

"Supernatural: Lazarus Rising (#4.1)" (2008)
Dean Winchester: [Pamela bends over to get something out of a cabinet, revealing a tattoo on her lower back reading 'Jesse Forever.'] Who's Jesse?
Pamela: Well, it wasn't forever.
Dean Winchester: His loss.
Pamela: Might be your gain.
Dean Winchester: [quietly, to Sam] Dude, I'm so in.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, she's gonna eat you alive.
Dean Winchester: Hey, I just got outta jail. Bring it.
Pamela: [to Sam] You're invited too, grumpy.
Dean Winchester: You are not invited.

Ruby: Where is it?
Dean Winchester: Where's what?
Ruby: The pizza that takes two guys to deliver.
Dean Winchester: I think we got the wrong room.
Sam Winchester: [Sam walks in the room] Hey is the...
Dean Winchester: Hey, ya, Sammy.
Dean Winchester: [Sam lunges at Dean] Oh ga...
Sam Winchester: Who are you?
Dean Winchester: [Bobby grabs Sam and pulls him off Dean] Like you didn't do this?
Sam Winchester: Do what?
Bobby Singer: It's him, it's him, Sam, I've been through this already, it's really him.
Sam Winchester: [Sam stops struggling] But...
Dean Winchester: [Dean takes a step forward] I know, I look fantastic, huh?

Sam Winchester: Hey, Dean. What was it like?
Dean Winchester: What, hell? I don't know. I-I must have blacked it out. I don't remember a damn thing.
Sam Winchester: Thank God for that.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
[next scene, Dean is looking in the mirror, very clearly remembering the tortures of hell]

Sam Winchester: I don't know if what I'm doing is right. Hell, I don't even know if I trust you... What I do know is I'm saving people, and stopping demons... And that feels good.

Sam Winchester: We got a pile of questions and no shovel.

Sam Winchester: I assume you'll wanna drive?
[He tosses keys to Dean who is seeing the Impala for the first time since being pulled out of Hell]
Dean Winchester: [laughing] I almost forgot. Hey, sweetheart. Ya miss me?
[He climbs in, shuts the door and settles into the driver's seat]
Dean Winchester: Ohhh.
[He looks at the dash]
Dean Winchester: What the Hell is that?
Sam Winchester: That's an iPod jack.
Dean Winchester: [disgusted] You were supposed to take of her, not douche her up.
Sam Winchester: Dean, I thought it was my car.
Dean Winchester: [Starts the car and the iPod plays pop music. Dean gives Sam a hard look] Really?
[Sam shrugs and Dean throws the iPod into the back seat]

Dean Winchester: Who are you?
Castiel: I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from Perdition.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, thanks for that.

Dean Winchester: Who are you?
Castiel: Castiel.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I figured that much. I mean *what* are you?
Castiel: I'm an angel of the Lord.
Dean Winchester: Get the hell out of here. There's no such thing.
Castiel: This is your problem, Dean. You have no faith.

Dean Winchester: Look, pal, I'm not buying what you're selling. So, who are you really?
Castiel: I told you.
Dean Winchester: Right. And why would an angel rescue me from hell?
Castiel: Good things do happen, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Not in my experience.
Castiel: What's the matter?
[pause, he studies Dean]
Castiel: You don't think you deserve to be saved.
Dean Winchester: Why'd you do it?
Castiel: Because God commanded it. Because we have work for you.

"Supernatural: On the Head of a Pin (#4.16)" (2009)
Dean Winchester: I'm tired of burying friends, Sam.
Sam Winchester: Look. We catch a fresh trail...
Dean Winchester: And we follow it. I know. Like I said, I'm just, I'm just gettin' tired.
Sam Winchester: Well, get angry!

Dean Winchester: [Sam and Dean enter their motel room and turn on the lights to find Castiel and Uriel waiting for them] Oh, c'mon.
Uriel: You're needed.
Dean Winchester: Needed? We just got *back* from needed!
Uriel: [low and menacing] Now you mind your tone with me.
Dean Winchester: No, you mind your damn tone with us.
[Takes a step towards Uriel but Sam cautions him to stop]
Sam Winchester: We just back from Pamela's funeral.
Dean Winchester: Pamela. You know, psychic Pamela? You remember her. Cas, you remember her. You- you burned her eyes out. Remember that? Good times! Yeah, then she died saving one of your precious seals. So, maybe you can stop pushing us around like pieces on a chess board for FIVE *FREAKIN'* MINUTES!
Uriel: [Menacing] We raised you outta Hell... for *our* purposes.
Dean Winchester: [Not backing down] Yeah, what were those again? What exactly do you want from me?
Uriel: Start with gratitude.
Dean Winchester: [a look of disgusted disbelief crosses his face] Oh...
Castiel: Dean, we know this is difficult to understand.
Uriel: And we
[silences Cas with a look]
Uriel: *don't* care.
[Dean looks at Cas, but Cas stays silent]

Dean Winchester: So, you need our help hunting a demon?
Castiel: Not quite. We have Alistair.
Dean Winchester: Great. He should be able to name your trigger man.
Castiel: But, he won't talk. Alistair's will is very strong. We've arrived at an impasse.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, well, he's like a black belt in torture. I mean, you guys are outta your league.
Uriel: That's why we've come to his student. You happen to be the most qualified interrogator we've got.
[Realization dawns on Dean and he swallows hard and lowers his head]
Castiel: Dean. You're our best hope.
Dean Winchester: No.
[Looks up at Cas]
Dean Winchester: No way. You can't ask me to do this, Cas. Not *this*.
Uriel: [Moves closer to Dean] Who said anything... about asking?
[Dean looks at Sam. When Sam looks over at Dean, he sees that he's disappeared with Cas and Uriel]
Sam Winchester: Dammit!

Castiel: [Sam is watching Dean on a ventilator in his hospital bed. Castiel comes to the door and Sam follows him out] Sam...
Sam Winchester: Get in there and heal. Miracle! Now!
Castiel: I can't.
Sam Winchester: You and Uriel *put* him in there...
Castiel: No.
Sam Winchester: - because you can't keep a simple Devil's trap together!

Castiel: The righteous man who begins it is the only one who can finish it.

Castiel: No. No demon can overpower that trap. I made it myself. We've been friends for a long time, Uriel. Fought by each other's sides, served together, away from home for what seems like forever. We're brothers, Uriel. Pay me that respect. Tell me the truth.
Uriel: The truth is, the only thing that can kill an angel, is another angel.
[Uriel's angelic blade slides into his hand]
Castiel: You.
Uriel: I'm afraid so.
Castiel: And you broke the devil's trap, set Alastair on Dean.
Uriel: Alastair should never have been taken alive. Really inconvenient, Cass. Yes, I did turn the screw a little. Alastair should have killed Dean and escaped, and you should have gone on happily scapegoating the demons.
Castiel: For the murders of our kin?
Uriel: Not murders, Castiel. No. My work is conversion. How long have we waited here? How long have we played this game by rules that don't make any sense?
Castiel: It is our Father's world, Uriel.
Uriel: Our Father? He stopped being that, if he ever was, the moment he created them. Humanity, his favorites. This whining, puking larva.
Castiel: Are you trying to convert me?
Uriel: I wanted you to join me. And I still do. With you, we can be powerful enough to...
Castiel: To?
Uriel: To raise our brother.
Castiel: Lucifer.
Uriel: You do remember him? How strong he was? How beautiful? And he didn't bow to humanity. He was punished for defending us. Now, you wanna believe in something Cass? Believe in him.
Castiel: Lucifer is not God.
Uriel: God isn't God anymore. He doesn't care what we do. I am proof of that.
Castiel: But this? What were going to do Uriel? Were you gonna kill the whole garrison?
Uriel: I only killed the ones that said no. Others have joined me, Cass. Now, please, brother, don't fight me. Help me. Help me spread the word. Help me bring on the apocalypse. All you have to do, is be unafraid.
Uriel: For the first time in a long time, I am.
[Castiel attacks Uriel, a fight ensues in which Uriel gains the upperhand]
Castiel: You can't win, Uriel. I still serve God.
Uriel: [Uriel ends every sentence with a punch to Castiel's face] You haven't even met the man. There is no Will. No Wrath. No God.
Anna Milton: [stabs Uriel through the throat from behind and then whispers in his ear] Maybe or maybe not, but there's still *me*.

Castiel: Strange. Strange how a leaky pipe, can undo the work of angels, when we ourselves are supposed to be the agents of fate.

Dean Winchester: [to Cas] Tell Uriel, or whoever... you do not want me doin' this. Trust me.
Castiel: Want it. No. But, I've been told we need it.
Dean Winchester: [Low and rough, a look of dread on his face] You ask me to open that door and walk through it...? You will not like what walks back out.

Castiel: [Sitting next to Dean's bed in the hospital room] You alright?
Dean Winchester: [Voice rough after being taken off the ventilator] No thanks to you.
Castiel: You need to be more careful.
Dean Winchester: You need to learn how to manage a damn Devil's trap.
Castiel: That's not what I mean. Uriel is dead.
Dean Winchester: Was it the demons?
Castiel: Disobedience. He was working against us.
Dean Winchester: [after a pause] Is it true? Did I break the first seal? Did I start all this?
Castiel: Yes. When we discovered Lilith's plan for you, we laid siege to Hell. And we fought our way to get to you before you...
Dean Winchester: Jump started the apocalypse?
Castiel: But we were too late.
Dean Winchester: [Roughly, ashamed] Why didn't you just leave me there then?
Castiel: It's not... blame that falls on you, Dean. It's fate. The righteous man who begins it is the only one who can finish it. You have to stop it.
Dean Winchester: Lucifer? The apocalypse? What does that mean? Hey! Don't you go disappearing on me, you son of a bitch. What does that mean?
Castiel: I don't know.
Dean Winchester: Bull!
Castiel: I don't. Dean, they don't tell me much. I know... our fate... rests... with you.
Dean Winchester: [His voice is strained, fighting soreness and tears] Well, then you guys are screwed. I can't do it, Cas. It's too big. Alistair was right. I'm not all here. I'm not str- I'm not strong enough.
[He turns his head away, a tear falling]
Dean Winchester: I guess I'm not the man either of our dads wanted me to be. Find someone else. It's not me.
[Another tear falls as Dean lays silent and defeated]

"Supernatural: The French Mistake (#6.15)" (2011)
Sam Winchester: For whatever reason, our life is a TV show.
Dean Winchester: Why?
Sam Winchester: I don't know.
Dean Winchester: No, seriously. Why? Why would anybody want to watch our lives?
Sam Winchester: Well, according to the interviewer, not very many people do. Look, I'm not saying it makes sense. I'm just saying we - we've landed in some dimension where you're Jensen Ackles, and I'm something called a "Jared Padalecki."
Dean Winchester: So what, now you're Polish? Is any of this make any sense to you?

Sam Winchester: So, now, uh, what's the deal with all this TV crap?
Misha Collins: Pardon?
Dean Winchester: Yeah. Amen, Padaleski.
Sam Winchester: Uh, "Lecki."
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: Lecki. Pretty sure.

Sam Winchester: [looks at a tanning bed] What am I, Dracula?
Dean Winchester: George Hamilton Dracula.

Sam Winchester: [to Robert Singer] Wait, your kidding. So, the character in the show, Bobby Singer...
Dean Winchester: What kind of douchebag names a character after himself?
Sam Winchester: Oh, that's not right.

Sam Winchester: [reading the episode script] Who wrote this? No one says "penultimate."
Dean Winchester: Gun, mouth, now.

Sam Winchester: [looks at an RV trailer] Hey. J. Ackles.
Dean Winchester: That's fake me.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: This must be fake mine.

Dean Winchester: These are words in a script! This isn't Cas!
Misha Collins: You guys wanna run lines or...?
Dean Winchester: His name's Misha! Misha?
Sam Winchester: Oh, wow!
Dean Winchester: Misha? Jensen? What's up with the names around here?

Dean Winchester: Dude, I have a helicopter.
Sam Winchester: Whoa. All right, who puts a 300-gallon aquarium in their trailer?
Dean Winchester: Apparently, Jensen Ackles.

Robert Singer: Guys. You can't come to work on poppers. And smuggle kidneys in from Mexico. And make up your own lines as you go. You cannot make up your own lines. Good God, what about your careers?
Sam Winchester: You know what? Screw our careers, Bob.
Robert Singer: What?
Dean Winchester: You heard my brother. That's right, I said brother. Because you know what, Bob? We're not actors. We're hunters. We're the Winchesters. Always have been and always will be. And where we're from, people don't know who we are. But you know what? We matter to that world. We even saved the son of a bitch once or twice. And yeah, okay, here, maybe there's some fans who give a crap about this nonsense.
Robert Singer: I wouldn't call it "nonsense."
Dean Winchester: But, Bob Singer... if that even is your name... tell me this. What does it all mean?
Robert Singer: Okay. This is good. I mean, we've all had our psychotic breaks, right? I can work with it.
Sam Winchester: Dean. Virgil. I think he has the key.
Dean Winchester: We quit.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.

"Supernatural: Two Minutes to Midnight (#5.21)" (2010)
Sam Winchester: The last thing Pestilence said, "It's too late."
Bobby Singer: He get specific?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: We're just a little freaked out that he might have left a bomb somewhere. So please tell us you have actual good news.
Bobby Singer: Chicago's about to be wiped off the map. Storm of the millennium. Sets off a daisy chain of natural disasters. Three million are gonna die.
Dean Winchester: Huh.
Castiel: [at Bobby] I don't understand your definition of good news.

Crowley: [to Bobby] Go ahead. Tell them. There's no shame in it.
Sam Winchester: Bobby? Tell us what?
Bobby Singer: World's gonna end. Seems stupid to get all precious over one little... soul.
Dean Winchester: You sold your soul?
Crowley: Oh, more like pawned it. I fully intend to give it back.
Dean Winchester: Well, then give it back!
Crowley: I will.
Dean Winchester: Now!
Sam Winchester: Did you kiss him?
Dean Winchester: Sam.
Sam Winchester: I was just wondering.
Bobby Singer: [innocently] No!
[Crowley shows a picture of his cellphone of them kissing]
Bobby Singer: Why'd you take a picture?
Crowley: Why do you have to use tongue?

Dean Winchester: [Trying to bluff his way into the security room of a convalescent home] Hey. Hi, uh, I'm looking for my nana. Her name is Eunice... Kennedy.
Security Guard: Go around front and see the nurse.
Dean Winchester: [Realizes it's not working, so he steps in and closes the door] You mind just helping me out, sir? Uh, she's about, uh... oh about that small,
[Holds his hand about waist high as the guard leans forward in his chair]
Dean Winchester: gray hair, wears diapers.
[He punches the guard who falls backward, out cold. Then he bangs on the door]
Sam Winchester: [Steps inside and closes the door] Eunice Kennedy?
Dean Winchester: That's the beauty about improv, Sammy. You never know what's gonna come outta your mouth.

Sam Winchester: [They are both weak, in pain, retching and fighting off unconsciousness as they struggle to move down the hall towards Pestilence] We must be getting close.
Dean Winchester: Ya think?

Dean Winchester: [Packing the Impala while Sam walks over, sighing heavily] Lemme guess. We're about to have a talk.
Sam Winchester: Look, Dean, um. For the record, I agree with you. About me. You think I'm too weak to take on Lucifer? Well, so do I. Believe me, I know exactly how screwed up I am. You. Bobby. Cas. I'm the least of any of you.
Dean Winchester: Oh, Sam...
Sam Winchester: It's true. It is. But... I'm also all we got. If there was another way... But, I don't think there is. There's just me. So, I don't know what else to do except just try to do what's gotta be done.
[They look at each other, and are interrupted by Crowley who appears behind them]
Crowley: Aaaaand... scene.

Dean Winchester: Alright, well. Good luck stopping the whole zombie apocalypse.
Sam Winchester: Yeah. Good luck killing Death.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: Remember when we used to just... hunt wendigos? How simple things were?
Dean Winchester: Not really.

Pestilence: How'd you get here?
Castiel: I took a bus. Don't worry, I...
[Cass keels over coughing and gagging]
Pestilence: Well, look at that. An occupied vessel, but powerless. Oh, that's fascinating. There's not a speck of an angel in you, is there?
[Cass slices off Pestilence's finger and takes his ring]
Castiel: Maybe just a speck.

Bobby Singer: What's *your* problem?
Castiel: This is what they meant by "The 11th Hour", right?
Bobby Singer: Pretty much.
Castiel: Well, it's The 11th Hour, and I am useless. All I have is this. What am I even supposed to do with it?
Bobby Singer: Point it and shoot.
Castiel: What I used to be...
Bobby Singer: Are you really gonna bitch, to *me*?

Castiel: [Contacting Dean via phone from a hospital after they defeated Zachariah] You said no to Michael. I owe you an apology.
Dean Winchester: Cas. It's okay.
Castiel: [Sincere] You are not the burnt and broken shell of a man that I believed you to be.
Dean Winchester: [Trying to keep the sarcasm from his voice] Thank you.
Dean Winchester: I appreciate that.

"Supernatural: Sacrifice (#8.23)" (2013)
[Sam stands Crowley in the chair upright]
Crowley: Aah. You did good back there, Moose. Yeah, I'll deny it i-if you ever quote me... but- but, man. I'm proud of you.
Sam Winchester: [picks up a spray-paint can] Thanks.
Crowley: Hold on. Uh, w-what's that?
Sam Winchester: It's what it looks like.
[Sam sprays over a sliver of wood bridging the gap in the Devil's Trap]
Crowley: Are you joking? I just saved your life.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] Seriously?
Crowley: "Seriously?" Me, "Seriously?" We just shared a foxhole, you and I. We beat back the Tet Offensive, outrun the- the Rape of Nanking, together! And still you're going to do me like this?
[Sam injects Crowley a sixth time]
Crowley: Aah! Aah! "Band of Brothers"? "The Pacific"? None of this means anything to you? All those motels, you never once watched HBO? Not once? "Girls"!
[Sam looks back at Crowley quizzically]
Crowley: You're my Marnie, Moose. A-and Hannah, she just- she *needs* to be loved. She deserves it. Don't we all? You, me? We deserve to be loved.
Crowley: [shouting emotionally] I deserve to be loved!
Crowley: [softly, almost whispering] I just want to be loved.
Sam Winchester: What?
Crowley: [as if he didn't hear] What?
[Crowley's expression changes as he realizes what he's been saying and feeling]

[last lines]
Sam Winchester: What's happening?
Dean Winchester: Angels. They're falling.

Dean Winchester: What's the good Father's playbook say now?
Sam Winchester: Well, now that we got the consecrated ground, I just, uh... I slip Crowley one dose of blood every hour for eight hours, then seal the deal with a bloody fist sandwich. That should do it.
Dean Winchester: Okay, the blood's supposed to be purified, isn't it? You ever, uh... you ever done the "Forgive me, Father" before?
Sam Winchester: Once. When we were kids.
[a surprised look crosses Dean's face]
Sam Winchester: Which is why I have no clue what to say now.
Dean Winchester: Um, well, I could give you a few suggestions, if you want.
Sam Winchester: Uh, okay, yeah, sure.
Dean Winchester: Okay, well. Just spit ballin' here,
[Hesitating a bit, starts slowly]
Dean Winchester: but if I were you... uh... Ruby? Killing Lilith. Letting Lucifer out.
[Picking up speed now]
Dean Winchester: Losing your soul. Not looking for me when I went to Purgatory.
Sam Winchester: [Sardonically] Thanks.
Dean Winchester: [Lifts his hands in a "Don't mind me" gesture] For starters.
[Sam grabs his gear and heads to the door]
Dean Winchester: Oh, hey, how 'bout, how about what you did to, uh, Penny Markle in the 6th grade?
[With a smirk on his face]
Dean Winchester: Why don't you lead with that?
Sam Winchester: [Turns to Dean] Wait, that was you.
Dean Winchester: [the smirk disappears and he looks away, hardening his voice] Carry on.

Sam Winchester: [Weakened, pale and sick, barely able to stand. His hand is bleeding from a cut, ready to take the last step of this third trial] Look at him. Look at him. Look how close we are. Other people will die if I don't finish this!
Dean Winchester: Think about it. Think about what we know. Huh? Pulling souls from Hell. Curing demons. Hell, ganking a hell hound! We have enough knowledge on our side to turn the tide here. But, I can't do it without you.
Sam Winchester: You can barely do it *with* me. I mean, you think I screw up everything I try. You think I need a chaperone, remember?
Dean Winchester: C'mon, man, that's not what I meant.
Sam Winchester: No, it's exactly what you meant. Do you wanna know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was? Was how many times I let you down. I can't do that again.
Dean Winchester: Sam...
Sam Winchester: What happens when you've decided I can't be trusted? Again? I mean, who are you gonna turn to next time instead of me? Another angel? Another...
[fighting tears]
Sam Winchester: ... another vampire? Do you have any idea what it feels like to watch your *brother*...
Dean Winchester: Just hold it. Hold on!
[Desperate to make Sam understand and believe]
Dean Winchester: You seriously think that? Because none of it- *none* of it- is true! Listen, man, I know we've had... our disagreements, okay? Hell, I know I've said some junk that set you back on your heels. But, Sammy... C'mon... I killed Benny... to save you. I'm willing to let this bastard, and all the sons o' bitches that killed Mom, *walk* because of you. Don't you *dare*... think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you! It has * never* been like that! *Ever*! I *need* you to see that. I'm beggin' you.
Sam Winchester: [Shaking, extremely weak] How do I stop?
Dean Winchester: [Steps up to Sam, his voice softer] Just let it go.
Sam Winchester: I can't. It's in me, Dean. You don't know what this feels like.
Dean Winchester: Hey, listen.
[Wrapping a kerchief around Sam's bleeding hand]
Dean Winchester: We will figure it out, okay?
[He gives Sam a smile]
Dean Winchester: Just like we always do. C'mon.
[He grabs Sam in a hug]
Dean Winchester: C'mon. Let it go. Okay? Let it go, brother.
[Sam notices the glow leaving his arms and pulls away to show Dean]
Dean Winchester: See?
[Then Sam collapses, screaming in pain]

[Castiel notices a homeless man with a scrap cardboard sign scrawled with "May God bless you. Donations welcome"]
Castiel: What was He like?
Metatron: [absentminded] Who? Oh. God?
Metatron: [sighs] Mm, pretty much like you'd expect: larger than life, gruff, bit of a sexist, but fair- eminently fair.

Metatron: What are you reading?
Castiel: Personal advertisements. The faster that man finds love, the faster that Cupid will come. Trust me: I'm friends with friends who do this for a living.
Dwight Charles: [walks over] Help you gents?
Castiel: Yes. Would you say you're looking for a... partner in crime, or, uh, someone who is into nurse role-play and light domination?
[he stares down Castiel, who stares back with an innocent, questioning look]
Dwight Charles: Brother, it's 10 AM on a Tuesday...
Metatron: [interrupting] Uh, we'll have two drafts, please.
Dwight Charles: [eyeing Castiel] Coming up.
[Dwight returns to behind the counter]
Metatron: You're not the most subtle tool in the shed, are you?

Kevin Tran: [looking at the Angel Tablet] Is this a joke?
Castiel: No. It's the word of God.
Kevin Tran: What?
Dean Winchester: It's a tablet. All right? Translate. It's what you do.
Kevin Tran: [chuckles] Okay. Um, it's the Angel Tablet, which I've never laid eyes on in my life. You want a translation in like six hours when it took me six months and a dead mom to translate a piece of the Demon Tablet?
Kevin Tran: [chuckles, pouring a drink] And according to your own words, this morning, this is not what I do. It's what I *did*. You told me I was out, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, well...
Kevin Tran: And if this is going to be the "Guys Like Us are Never Out" speech, save it.
Castiel: [teleports across the room, grabs Kevin by the collar and pulls him up close to his face, startling Kevin to drop his glass, shattering on the floor] Dean's right.
Dean Winchester: Cass!
Castiel: There is no "out". Only duty.
Kevin Tran: Get the hell off me!
Castiel: You are a Prophet of The Lord, always and forever!
Castiel: [pauses, catches himself] ... Until the day you cease to exist and then another Prophet takes your place.
[Dean rolls his eyes on Castiel's obligatory full disclosure]
Castiel: [pushes Kevin to the table] Now, are you clear as to the task before you?
[Kevin nods]
Castiel: Then do it.
Castiel: [to Dean] And let's go.
[with the rustle of angelic wings, Dean and Castiel are gone]

[Dean puts a free bottle of beer in front of Castiel]
Castiel: You really think it's wise to be drinking on the job?
Dean Winchester: What show *you* been watchin'?

"Supernatural: LARP and the Real Girl (#8.11)" (2013)
Sam Winchester: So, the toxicology report came back on Lance. Nothin'. But the medical examiner said his body showed clear signs that he was killed by Belladonna.
Dean Winchester, Charlie Bradbury: [in unison] The pornstar?
Sam Winchester: The poison.
Dean Winchester, Charlie Bradbury: [in unison] Oh.

Sam Winchester: [Answered his cell] Garth, hey. Really. Okay, uh, yeah. Thanks, man. Oh, hey, hey Garth. Garth, you there? How'd you know where we are?
Sam Winchester: Look, it's bad enough that you're tracking us. But, it's even worse when you say... we've... been... Garthed.

Dean Winchester: We want to know about the, uh, the texts you sent Ed last night.
Lance Jacobsen: I told them when they brought me in those texts weren't from me.
Sam Winchester: Well, your phone and Ed's phone say otherwise.
Lance Jacobsen: No, I mean, they were from me. But, they weren't from *me* me.
Dean Winchester: [Exchanges a look with Sam] Did you really think that sentence was gonna clear things up?

Dean Winchester: [He and Sam are following Charlie, but Dean is distracted and picks up a fake sword just used in a fake duel] Nice balance.
Sam Winchester: [Turns back to Dean] Dude.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
[He follows Sam still carrying the fake sword]

Dean Winchester: [Reviewing Charlie's map in preparation for the battle of the Kingdom] You know if you move your archers back and your broad swordsmen to the west...
Charlie Bradbury: Oh. Flood the warriors.
Dean Winchester: Yep.
Charlie Bradbury: Good call.
Dean Winchester: Thanks.
Charlie Bradbury: What about the southern wall?
Sam Winchester: Guys!
Dean Winchester: Yeah. Right. Sorry.
[He quietly shifts a catapult to a different position on the map and he and Charlie exchange nods]

Sam Winchester: [Walking up to see Dean in his Moondoor outfit] Nice outfit.
Dean Winchester: You love it.

Gerry: [At a meeting to exchange a shadow ork for Charlie] Greetings, heretics.
Max Hilby: You should kneel before me, cur.
Dean Winchester: [Getting impatient] Alright. Why don't you let me...
Gerry: Silence!
[to the Shadow King]
Gerry: Now. Before we exchange, a few announcements.
[He and the Shadow King step toward each other and break character]
Gerry: There is a peewee league soccer playoff game tomorrow on the alpha field. We don't want to freak out the mundane, so we gotta move the battle of Kingdoms to the beta...
Dean Winchester: [All patience gone, he pulls out his gun] Alright. That's it. You know what? I'm gonna do this the old fashioned way.
Sam Winchester: Dean, don't...
Dean Winchester: No!
Gerry: I told you...
Dean Winchester: Shut up!
[Walks up to the Shadow King with his gun]
Dean Winchester: Alright. I need real answers. This here is a real gun. See?
[He fires the gun into the ground and everyone but Sam jumps]
Max Hilby: Whoa! Hold. Hold! Geez!
Dean Winchester: [Pointing his gun at him] Start talking. Where's the queen?
Max Hilby: I don't know!
Dean Winchester: [Pointing his gun at the Tree of Pain on Max's shirt] Yeah, well, your, uh, your little family crest there tells a different story, pal.
Max Hilby: [Pointing to his shirt] This?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Max Hilby: [He removes his glove and pulls up his sleeve to show the same tree on his arm] Uh. I got sick last month after this thing just appeared on my arm. I thought it looked really cool so I turned it into my family crest. I mean, after my dermatologist said it wasn't malignant.

Dean Winchester: [In full getup, face paint and wig, pacing in front of the Queen's army, preparing for the battle of the Kingdom and having some fun!] Dying in your beds many years from now, would you be willing to trade *all* the days... from this day to that... for one chance...
Charlie Bradbury: [Whispering to Sam, who is also dressed for the occasion] Isn't that the speech from...
Sam Winchester: [Whispering back] It's the only one he knows.
Dean Winchester: Just *one* chance... to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they will never take...
LARPer: Hold!
[a Frisbee flies through the air and lands on the ground near Dean. Everyone waits while a guy runs up, grabs it and runs out]
Dean Winchester: [Nods to the player to resume] Our freedom!
[the warriors all charge across the field with Sam and Dean in the lead]

"Supernatural: Mannequin 3: The Reckoning (#6.14)" (2011)
Dean Winchester: How ya feeling?
Sam Winchester: Like I got hit by a... planet.
Dean Winchester: Well, lucky for you I'm a doctor. I got joe, grub, and...
[shakes a bottle of pills]
Sam Winchester: What are they?
Dean Winchester: Effective.

Sam Winchester: [about a new case] Where to?
Dean Winchester: Paterson, New Jersey. Hey, maybe we'll have a Snookie citing.
Sam Winchester: What's a Snookie?
Dean Winchester: That's a good question.

Dean Winchester: [takes the heart from an anatomically correct dummmy and shows it to Sam] Be my valentine?
Sam Winchester: Dude, we're working. Put it back.
Dean Winchester: Have a heart.
Sam Winchester: Dean.
Dean Winchester: Buzzkill.

Dean Winchester: Hey. So what'd you find out from the mop jockey's girlfriend?
Sam Winchester: Nothing. Just how great he was.
[He speaks rhythmically as he enumerates the mop jockey's great points]
Sam Winchester: Went to church. Donated to charity. Rubbed her feet during Glee.
Dean Winchester: [Mimicking Sam's tone] I just threw up in my mouth.

Sam Winchester: Wait. That anatomy dummy you were molesting at the lab.
Dean Winchester: Excuse me?
Sam Winchester: What if that's what this is about?
Dean Winchester: What exactly are you accusing me of?

Sam Winchester: Look, we... keep our heads down, keep swinging. We'll lose some. Hopefully, we'll win more. And... I don't know. Anyway. For what it's worth, I got your back.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I know.

Dean Winchester: [Referring to when Sam suffered a seizure then passed while trying to remember when his soul was gone] It was hell, wasn't it? You got a big, fat face full of hell. Ever cross your mind that you could have died?
Sam Winchester: Oh, c'mon.
Dean Winchester: I'm serious. And none of this is just a flesh wound *crap*. Cuz we did it your way. We let you go explore, and every bad thing that I said would happen *happened*. So guess what? Past stays past. We're not kickin' that wall again.
Sam Winchester: So, I'm supposed to just ignore it?
Dean Winchester: [Emphatically] Yes!
Sam Winchester: Dean, I might have done... who knows what. And you want me to just forget about it?
Dean Winchester: You shove it down. And you let it come out in, in, in spurts of... violence and alcoholism.
Sam Winchester: Ah. Sounds healthy.
Dean Winchester: Well. Works for me.

Johnny: What's going on?
Sam Winchester: That was a ghost, trying to *kill* you for being a *dick*.
Johnny: What?
Sam Winchester: You know what? You're lucky you were the most suspicious interview of all time!
[Under his breath as he pours salt across a doorway]
Sam Winchester: I figured something like this would happen.
Johnny: Figured something like *what* would happen?
Sam Winchester: [All patience and inclination for subtlety is gone] Buddy, look. I don't have time for the big speech, alright? So. Brass tacks? Rose is back.

"Supernatural: No Rest for the Wicked (#3.16)" (2008)
Dean Winchester: [Desperate to take his mind off things] Why don't we just make a TJ run, huh? Ya know... some senoritas, cervesas. Uh, we could... what's Spanish for donkey show?
Sam Winchester: [smiling] So, if we *do* save you, let's never do that.

Sam Winchester: Hey, Dean. We're cutting it close, I know. But, we're gonna get this done. I don't care what it takes, Dean. You're not gonna go to Hell. I'm not gonna let you. I swear. Everything's gonna be okay.
Dean Winchester: [Smiles at Sam until he hallucinates, seeing Sam's face change, twist and contort into grotesque images. Dean's smile vanishes and he tries to hide the fear from Sam] Yeah, okay.

Bobby Singer: New Harmony, Indiana.
[Bobby has used a spell to locate Lilith]
Bobby Singer: And we have a winner.
Sam Winchester: [Ready for action] Okay. Let's go.
Dean Winchester: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on. Just holster it up there, Tex.
Sam Winchester: What's the problem?
Dean Winchester: What's the problem? C'mon, where do I begin? I mean, first of all, we don't even know if Lilith actually holds my deal. We're goin' offa Bela's intel? When that bitch breathes, the air comes out crooked. Okay? Second, even if we could get to Lilith, we have no way to gank her. And third, isn't this the same Lilith that wants your giant head on a pike? Should I continue?
Bobby Singer: Ain't you just bringin' down the room?
Dean Winchester: Well, it's a gift.

Dean Winchester: All I'm sayin'- Sammy, all I'm sayin' is you're my weak spot. You are. And I'm yours.
Sam Winchester: You don't mean that. We're... we're family.
Dean Winchester: I know. And those evil sons o' bitches know it, too. I mean, what we'd do for each other, how far we'll go. They're using it against us.
Sam Winchester: [fighting back tears] So, what, we just stop looking out for each other?
Dean Winchester: No, we stop bein' martyrs. Man, we- we stop spreadin' it for these demons. We take this knife, and we go after Lilith *our* way, the way Dad taught us to. And if we go down, then uh... we go down swingin'. Whaddya think?
Sam Winchester: I think you totally shoulda been jammin' Eye of the Tiger right there.
Dean Winchester: Oh, bite me.
Dean Winchester: Ya know, I totally rehearsed that speech, too.

Bobby Singer: Where do you think you're goin'?
Dean Winchester: We got the knife.
Bobby Singer: And you intend to use it without me. Do I look like a ditchable prom date to you?
Sam Winchester: No, Bobby, of course not.
Dean Winchester: This is about me. And Sam. 'Kay, this isn't your fight.
Bobby Singer: [Pissed, advances on Dean and gets in his face] The Hell it isn't! Family don't end with blood, boy!
[Dean swallows hard, overwhelmed. Bobby backs up a step]
Bobby Singer: 'Sides, you need me.
Dean Winchester: Bobby...
Bobby Singer: You're playin' wounded. Tell me, how many hallucinations have you had so far?
[Sam gives Dean a hard look]
Dean Winchester: [Looks at Sam then back to Bobby] How'd ya know?
Bobby Singer: Because that's what happens when you got hellhounds on your butt. And because I'm smart.

Sam Winchester: Hey, Dean.
[They're in the car at night]
Dean Winchester: Yeah?
Sam Winchester: You know, if this doesn't, uh... if this doesn't go the way we want, I want you to know that...
Dean Winchester: No, no, no, no.
Sam Winchester: No, what?
Dean Winchester: You're not gonna bust out the misty goodbye speech. Okay? I mean, if this is my last day on earth, I do not want it to be socially awkward.
Dean Winchester: You know what I do want...
[He turns the radio on and Wanted Dead or Alive is playing]
Sam Winchester: [surprised] Bon Jovi?
Dean Winchester: Bon Jovi rocks. On occasion.
[Dean starts singing, belting it out. Then hits Sam on the arm]
Dean Winchester: C'mon.
[Sam joins in, quietly at first, then louder. They sing together, Dean taking Bon Jovi's lead and Sam singing Sambora's part. Sam continues to sing as Dean grows quiet, getting sober as fear and worry take over]

Sam Winchester: So what, now you're seein' demons?
Dean Winchester: I've been seein' all kinds of things lately, but nothing like this.
Bobby Singer: Actually, it's not all that crazy.
Dean Winchester: How is it not that crazy?
Bobby Singer: Well, you got just over five hours to go? You're piercing the veil, Dean. Glimpsing the B side.
Dean Winchester: [Frustrated] A little less new-agey, please.
Bobby Singer: [Bluntly] You're almost hell's bitch. So... you can see hell's other bitches.
Dean Winchester: [Sarcastically] Thank you.

Sam Winchester: [Time is running out] Okay. You win. What do I have to do?
Ruby: What do you mean?
Sam Winchester: To save Dean. What do you need me to do?
[Dean comes up behind him]
Dean Winchester: [He grabs Sam] What the hell do you think you're doin'?
Sam Winchester: No. Just shut up for a second.
[Pushes Dean off]
Sam Winchester: Ruby!
Ruby: You had your chance. You can't just flip a switch. We needed time.
Sam Winchester: [Desperate now] Well, there's gotta be somethin'. There's gotta be some way. Whatever it is, I'll *do* it.
[Dean grabs him again and Sam tries to fight him off]
Sam Winchester: No. Dean! I'm not gonna let you go to hell, Dean!
Dean Winchester: Yes, you are!
Dean Winchester: Yes, you are.
Dean Winchester: I'm sorry. I mean, this is all my fault. I know that. But, what you're doin'. It's not gonna save me. It's only gonna kill you.
Sam Winchester: [Fighting tears] Then what am I supposed to do?
Dean Winchester: Keep fightin'. Take care of my wheels. Sam, remember what Dad taught ya. 'Kay? And remember what I taught you.
[Fighting tears, tries to smile. Then a clock starts to chime midnight. Sam looks at Dean, crying as Dean smiles at him]

"Supernatural: It's the Great Pumpkin, Sam Winchester (#4.7)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: [Upon meeting Castiel for the first time] Oh, my God! Er, ah, I didn't mean to... sorry.

Dean Winchester: So we're talking ghosts?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: Zombies?
Sam Winchester: Mm-hmm.
Dean Winchester: Leprechauns?
Sam Winchester: Dean.
Dean Winchester: Those little dudes are scary. Small hands.

Sam Winchester: You know, my brother was right about you. You are dicks.
Uriel: The only reason you're still alive, Sam Winchester, is because you've been useful. But the moment that ceases to be true, the second you become more trouble than you're worth, one word, one, and I will turn you to dust.
Uriel: As for your brother, tell him that maybe he should climb off of that high horse of his. Ask Dean what he remembers from Hell.

Astronaut: [Outside their motel, Sam and Dean cross paths with a kid dressed as an astronaut with a bucket of candy] Trick or treat?
Dean Winchester: This is a motel.
Astronaut: So?
Dean Winchester: So, we don't have any candy.
Sam Winchester: No, we have a ton in the-
[Dean cuts him off]
Dean Winchester: We did, but it's gone.
[the kid isn't buying it]
Dean Winchester: Sorry, kid, we can't help you.
Astronaut: I want candy.
Dean Winchester: Well, I think *you've* had enough.
Astronaut: [the boy narrows his eyes into a steely-eyed glare and walks away roughly shouldering past Dean]
Dean Winchester: [Dean is disturbed/confused]

Sam Winchester: Interesting look for a centuries-old witch.
Dean Winchester: Yesh, well, if you were a 600-year-old hag and you could pick any costume to come back in, Wouldn't you go for a hot cheerleader? I would.

Castiel: Our orders were not to stop the summoning of Samhain. They were to do whatever you told us to do.
Dean Winchester: Your orders were to follow my orders?
Castiel: It was a test to see how you would perform under battlefield conditions, you might say.

Castiel: I'm not here to judge you Dean.
Dean Winchester: Then why are you here?

Castiel: You misunderstand me Dean. I'm not like you think. I was praying that you would choose to save the town.
Dean Winchester: You were?
Castiel: These people, they're all my father's creations. They're works of art. And yet, even though you stopped Samhain the seal was broken and we are one step closer to Hell on Earth for all creation. And that's not an expression Dean. It's literal. You of all people should appreciate what that means. Can I tell you something if you promise not to tell another soul?
Dean Winchester: Okay.
Castiel: I'm not a hammer, as you say. I have questions. I-I have doubts. I don't know what is right and what is wrong anymore, whether you passed or failed here. But, in the coming months, you will have more decisions to make. I don't envy the weight that's on your shoulders, Dean. I truly don't.

"Supernatural: Survival of the Fittest (#7.23)" (2012)
Dean Winchester: Hey, there. So, Cas, what's, uh, what's the word?
Castiel: Well, Dean, I've been thinking. Monkeys... are so clever, and their sensible in that they leave the skins on the bananas that they eat. Is it really necessary to test cosmetics on them? I mean, how important is lipstick to you, Dean?
Dean Winchester: Not very.

Castiel: You know, Leviathan can kill angels. There's a reason my Father locked them in purgatory. They're the... piranha that would eat the whole aquarium.

Crowley: Castiel. When last we spoke, you, well, enslaved me. I'm confused. Why aren't you dead?
Castiel: I... don't know.
Crowley: Well, you want to be? 'Cause I can help with that.
Dean Winchester: All right, enough.
Crowley: It's enough when I say. I came here to help you. I've found out you've been lying to me, harboring an angel, and not just *any* angel - the one angel I most want to crush between my teeth.
Meg: Oh, so you can crush angels now, huh?
Crowley: You bore me. You know that? You have no sense of poetry.

Crowley: Now, what do you have to say for yourself?
Castiel: Well, I'm still honing my communication strategy. I-I haven't even been back to Heaven. I keep thinking there are no insects up there, but here we have trillions. You know, they're making honey and silk and... miracles, really.
Crowley: What are you talking about?
Castiel: Um, preferring insects to angels, I guess. Here. I can offer a token, if you like. It's honey. I-I collected it myself.
Crowley: You're off your rocker. He's off his rocker! Is that it? Heh, karma's a bitch isn't it?
Dean Winchester: Look, did you come here to donkey punch your old grudges, or to help us get Dick? Pick a battle!
Crowley: Well, I'm vexed. I'd *like* to do both! But where's the fun in clobbering a ball of wet fur? Text me when Sparkles here retrieves his marbles, I suppose.

Castiel: So, none of this should cause you no any ill effect. I went to a little farm in Normandy for the wheat and the lettuce and the tomato and - and I thoroughly examined and comforted the pig before I... slaughtered it for the ham. Here. You need your strength.
Dean Winchester: Thanks, Cas.

Dean Winchester: Last I remember, we ganked Dick.
Castiel: And where would *he* go in death?
Dean Winchester: Wait. Are you telling me...?
Castiel: Every soul here is a monster. This is where they come to prey upon each other for all eternity.
Dean Winchester: We're in purgatory? How do we get out?
Castiel: I'm afraid we're much more likely to be ripped to shreds.
Dean Winchester: Cas, I think we better go...
[Castiel vanishes]
Dean Winchester: Cas?

Castiel: Please, accept this sandwich as a gesture of solidarity.

Dean Winchester: Hey Shifty, what's your problem?
Castiel: Do we need a cat? Doesn't this place feel one species short?
Dean Winchester: You got anything to say on the topic of Dicks?

"Supernatural: Caged Heat (#6.10)" (2010)
Dean Winchester: [Sam and Dean wake up tied to chairs facing one another] What now?
Sam Winchester: I think I know who you can ask.
Dean Winchester: [Looks over his shoulder] Evil bitch.
Meg: Keep sweet-talking me; this could go a whole new direction.
Dean Winchester: Meg. I've been dying to see you again.
Meg: Well, here I am, big boy. So what should we do now?
Dean Winchester: How 'bout I rip you to shreds?
Meg: Kinky, I like. But a little Q n' A first if you don't mind. Now where's your boss?

Sam Winchester: When angels and demons agree on something, call me nuts, I'd pay attention!

Dean Winchester: Sam?
Sam Winchester: Yea?
Dean Winchester: I'm standing in pee!
Sam Winchester: Consider yourself lucky.
Dean Winchester: Yikes. That's gross.

Samuel Campbell: Is this what you boys do? Sit around and watch porno's with angels?
Castiel: We're not supposed to talk about it.

Castiel: [while watching porn] That's very complex
Dean Winchester: M-hm
Castiel: If the pizzaman truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep slapping her rear?
Castiel: Perhaps she's done something wrong.
Dean Winchester: You're watching porn? Why?
Castiel: It was there.
Dean Winchester: You don't watch porn in a room full of dudes. And... you don't talk about it. Just turn it off.
Castiel: [Looks between his legs]
Dean Winchester: Oh, now he's got a boner

Meg: I'll hold off the dogs.
Dean Winchester: Well, how are you gonna do that exactl - -
[Meg pulls Castiel into a kiss and reaches into his trench coat. They pull apart, and Castiel spins Meg around, pushes her against the wall, and kisses her again]
Meg: [Almost dreamily] What was that?
Castiel: [Looks at Dean and Sam, who are dumbfounded] I learned that from the pizza man.
Meg: Well, A plus for you. I feel so... clean.

Crowley: What's in the gift bag?
Castiel: [pulls out a skull] You are.

Castiel: [Sees Meg and the demons that he, Sam and Dean will be working with] Why are we working with these...
[like a dirty word]
Castiel: abominations?
Meg: Keep talking dirty, makes my meat-suit all dewy.

"Supernatural: Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (#2.4)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: Dean, what is it?
Dean Winchester: I'm sorry.
Sam Winchester: You...? For what?
Dean Winchester: The way I've been acting.
[long beat]
Dean Winchester: And for dad. I mean he was your dad too, and it's my fault that he's gone.
Sam Winchester: What are you talking about?
Dean Winchester: I know you've been thinking it, so have I. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out. Back at the hospital, full recovery. It was a miracle, and five minutes later dad's dead and the colt's gone.
Sam Winchester: Dean...
Dean Winchester: You can't tell me there's not a a connection there. I don't know how the demon was involved. I don't know how the whole thing went down exactly, but dad's dead because of me and that much I do know.
Sam Winchester: We don't know that, not for sure.
Dean Winchester: Sam, you and dad, you're the most important people in my life. And now... I never should have come back Sam, it wasn't natural, and now look whats come of it. I was dead and I should've stayed dead. You wanted to know I was feeling, well thats it. So tell me, what could you possibly say to make that alright?

Dean Winchester: Sam, if you bring up dad's death one more time, I swear...
Sam Winchester: Please, Dean, it's killing you, please. We've already lost dad, we've lost mom, I've lost Jessica. And now I'm gonna lose you too?
Dean Winchester: We better get out of here before the cops come. I hear you, okay? Yeah, I'm being an ass and I'm sorry.
[Sam nods]
Dean Winchester: But right now we got a freaking zombie running around, we need to figure out how to kill it.
[Sam smiles]
Dean Winchester: Right?
Sam Winchester: Our lives are weird, man.
Dean Winchester: You're telling me. Come on.

Dean Winchester: [Dean and Sam are discussing how to kill a zombie]
Dean Winchester: We can't just waste her with a headshot?
Sam Winchester: Dude, you've been watching way too many Romero flicks.
Dean Winchester: You're telling me there's no lore on how to smoke 'em?
Sam Winchester: No, Dean, I'm telling you there's too much. I mean there's a hundred different legends on the walking dead, but they all have different methods for killing them. Some say setting them on fire, one said... where is it? Right here: feeding their hearts to wild dogs. That's my personal favorite. But who knows what's real and what's myth?
Dean Winchester: Is there anything they all have in common?
Sam Winchester: No, but a few said silver might work.

Sam Winchester: Silver bullets?
Dean Winchester: I've got enough to make her rattle like a change purse.

[Re-burrying Angela's corpse]
Sam Winchester: Rest in peace.
Dean Winchester: For good this time, okay?

Sam Winchester: Do you think she's in?
Dean Winchester: Nah I think she went out to rent beaches.
Sam Winchester: Look smart ass she might kill someone.

Sam Winchester: Did we have to use me as bait?
Dean Winchester: I figured you were more her type. She had pretty crappy taste in guys.

"Supernatural: Beyond the Mat (#11.15)" (2016)
Dean Winchester: We've got jack on another Hand of God and Amara, and we've got even less jack on how to save Cas.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, if he wants to be saved.
Dean Winchester: He does. Even if he doesn't know it yet.

Dean Winchester: Dude, dude, Gunner freaking Lawless.
Sam Winchester: Groupie much?
Dean Winchester: Shut up. Should I go say hi? I should go say hi. I'm gonna say hi.
[goes over to Gunner Lawless]
Dean Winchester: Hi. I... saw you stand over there and just told my brother that I should come over and say hi. So... I... came over and... hi.

Sam Winchester: It's just... you were my first crush.
Rio: You weren't one of those guys that had my poster above their bed were you?
Sam Winchester: What? No!
Dean Winchester: [some time later] Did you tell her you used to have her poster over your bed when you were a kid?
Sam Winchester: No.

Dean Winchester: Yeah, think about that. Town after town, putting your ass on the line for next to nothing? No money. No glory. Wow.
Sam Winchester: You realize you just literally described our jobs.

Sam Winchester: Dude, you okay?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [farts] Ah.
Sam Winchester: What happened?
Dean Winchester: Mostly tequila... cut with holy water.

Sam Winchester: We just gotta...
Dean Winchester: Keep grinding. No matter how much it hurts, how hard it gets. You gotta keep grinding.
Sam Winchester: Right.
Dean Winchester: And that's how we roll. And we're gonna win. We're gonna save Cas, ice the devil and shank the Darkness. And anyone that gets in our our way, may God help him.

Lucifer: You made me bleed my own blood!

"Supernatural: Hollywood Babylon (#2.18)" (2007)
Dean Winchester: What's a P.A.?
Sam Winchester: I think it's kinda like a slave.

Dean Winchester: Oh, like "Poltergeist"?
Sam Winchester: It could be a poltergeist.
Dean Winchester: No, no, no. Like the movie, "Poltergeist."
[Sam looks confused]
Dean Winchester: You know nothing of your cultural heritage, do you?

Sam Winchester: So what do you think?
Dean Winchester: Well, I think being a PA sucks, but the food these people get? Are you kidding me? I mean, look at these things, they're like miniature philly cheese steak sandwiches, they're delicious!
[offers one to Sam, who looks grossed out]
Sam Winchester: Maybe later.

Dean Winchester: Sam, check it out, it's Matt Damon.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, pretty sure that's not Matt Damon.
Dean Winchester: No, it is.
Sam Winchester: Well, Matt Damon just picked up a broom and started sweeping.

Sam Winchester: Does this look like swimming-pool weather to you Dean? It's practically Canadian!

[while trekking through a cemetery at night]
Dean Winchester: Man, this map is totally worth the 5 bucks. Hey, we gotta go check out Johnny Ramone's grave when we're done here.
Sam Winchester: You wanna dig him up, too?
Dean Winchester: Bite your tongue, heathen!

Sam Winchester: You know, maybe the spirits are trying to shut down the movie because they think it sucks. 'Cause, I mean, it kinda does.

"Supernatural: Dark Side of the Moon (#5.16)" (2010)
Dean Winchester: A bit trippy, right?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
[noticed Dean's T-shirt]
Sam Winchester: More trippy, um, apparently you "wuv hugs"
Dean Winchester: [Looks at his T-shirt] Shut up.

Sam Winchester: ...Maybe that's what Heaven is: you relive your greatest hits.

Dean Winchester: Your heaven is somebody else's Thanksgiving, okay? It's bailing on your family. I mean, what do you want me to say?
Sam Winchester: Man, I never got the crusts cut off my PB&J... I just don't look at family the way you do.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, but *I'm* your family. We're supposed to be a team, it's supposed to be you and me against the world, right?
Sam Winchester: Dean, it is.
Dean Winchester: ...Is it?

Sam Winchester: You alright?
Dean Winchester: Define alright.

Dean Winchester: Cas, hey, so er, so I found Sam but something just happened. There was this weird beam of light.
Castiel: Don't go into the light!
Dean Winchester: OK, thanks... Carol Anne.

Castiel: You think maybe, just maybe, we should find out what the hell God has been saying?

Castiel: You have to find an angel, his name is Joshua.
Dean Winchester: Hey, man, no offense, but we are kinda ass-full of angels alright?

"Supernatural: Live Free or Twihard (#6.5)" (2010)
Sam Winchester: Where are you going?
Dean Winchester: Bathroom! Newsflash wizard, vampires pee too.

Dean Winchester: [after being turned by a vampire, he is being bombarded by light and noise, everything amplified to an overwhelming brightness and volume] Oh my God, what's that sound?
Sam Winchester: What sound?
Dean Winchester: [Knocks over a lamp to cut the light. Overwhelmed by the sound of sirens, a heartbeat, car horns, people talking] Wha-?
[Realizing he's hearing people in another room, he walks over and hit his hand against the wall]
Dean Winchester: Hey c'mon! Keep it down, dammit!
[He turns, suddenly blinded by the overhead light]
Dean Winchester: Please, *please* shut that off.
[He puts his hand against the pounding in his head, pounding from the light and the sound of people's voices, Sam's footsteps, the flip of the light switch]
Sam Winchester: Dean, you should sit down.
Dean Winchester: *You* sit down.

Dean Winchester: Samuel's gonna kill me when he gets here.
Sam Winchester: No, Dean, he's not.
Dean Winchester: Yes, he is. Cuz I'm gonna ask him to cuz *you* won't do it.
Sam Winchester: Okay, just hold on a second.
Dean Winchester: For what, huh? *Look* at me!

Sam Winchester: [He and Samuel have followed a line of bodies and blood to find Dean in the vampires' nest. Standing on the mezzanine, they look down to see Dean sitting in the middle of the large room, holding his machete] Dean, you okay?
Dean Winchester: [Voice rough with fatigue, fear] Yeah, I'm okay.
[the camera pans down from Dean's face to show that his foot is resting on the now severed head of the vampire that turned him, his body several feet away, a trail of blood between them]

Samuel Campbell: This works, it's not gonna be a kiddy ride, you know that.
Dean Winchester: [Almost doubled over] That's great. Light 'er up.
Sam Winchester: So, what'd you see in there?
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: In the nest. What'd you see?
Dean Winchester: Sam, I can't hear you! You... your blood is so freakin' loud! Okay? So, just back off!
[to Samuel]
Dean Winchester: Alright, gimme the damn cure.
[He takes the cup, is shaken by the smell and then tries to smile]
Dean Winchester: Lechaim.
[He downs it in one. Then waits... ]
Dean Winchester: I don't think it-
[He suddenly doubles over and is violently sick]
Sam Winchester: Is it working?
Samuel Campbell: Either that, or he's dying.
[Dean is overcome as the cure starts to work, falling to the floor in pain as memories of the last several days flash through his mind, going back to when Boris turned him, and he sees Sam standing in the alley watching. Dean finally comes to and sees Sam smiling next to him, helping him to sit up, and he looks at Sam as his fear about him deepens]

Dean Winchester: Their Alpha's building an army.
Samuel Campbell: That's comforting.
Dean Winchester: That's not the worst.
Sam Winchester: Then what is?
Dean Winchester: We don't scare them anymore.

Sam Winchester: How'd it go with Lisa?
Dean Winchester: It didn't.
Sam Winchester: Oh, I'm sorry.
Dean Winchester: [More convinced than ever that there is something wrong with Sam] Yeah. At least, uh... you got my back. No matter what happens, I can always count on you, right, Sammy?
Sam Winchester: Of course, Dean.
[Not convinced, Dean watches Sam warily as they get in the car]

"Supernatural: Bedtime Stories (#3.5)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: I came here to make you an offer.
Crossroads Demon: You're going to make me an offer? That's adorable.
Sam Winchester: You can let Dean out of his deal right now. He lives, I live... you live, everyone goes home happy. Or you stop breathing permanently.

Crossroads Demon: All this tough talk, I have to tell you it's not very convincing. I mean, come on Sam, do you even want to break the deal?
Sam Winchester: What do you think?
Crossroads Demon: I don't know. Aren't you tired of cleaning up Dean's messes? Of dealing with that broken psyche of his? Aren't you tired of being bossed around like a snot-nosed little brother? You're stronger than Dean. You're better than him.
Sam Winchester: Watch your mouth.
Crossroads Demon: Admit it, you're here going through the motions, but truth is you'll be a tiny bit relieved when he's gone.
Sam Winchester: Shut up.
Crossroads Demon: No more desperate, sloppy, needy Dean. You can finally be free.

Sam Winchester: Alright, enough of this crap. You let Dean out of his deal right now.
Crossroads Demon: Sorry sweetheart, but your brother's an adult. He made that deal of his own free will, fair and square. It's ironclad.

Sam Winchester: Fine, then I'll kill you. If you're dead then so is the deal.
Crossroads Demon: Guess again.
Sam Winchester: What?
Crossroads Demon: Sam, I'm just a saleswoman. I've got a boss just like everyone. He holds the contract not me. He wants Dean's soul bad, and believe me he's not going to let it go.

Sam Winchester: Who is it?
Crossroads Demon: I can't tell you. I'm sorry Sam, but there's no way out of this. Not this time
Sam Winchester: [thinks then shoots her]

Dean Winchester: What the hell do you make of that?
Sam Winchester: Actually, I do have a theory. Uh, sorta.
Dean Winchester: Hit me.
Sam Winchester: Well, thinkin' about fairy tales.
Dean Winchester: ...Oh that's, that's nice. You think about fairy tales often?

Sam Winchester: You remember Cinderella?
Dean Winchester: ...
Sam Winchester: The pumpkin that turns into a coach and the mice that become horses?
Dean Winchester: ...Dude, could you be more gay?
Sam Winchester: [flustered] ...
Dean Winchester: Don't answer that.

"Supernatural: Lucifer Rising (#4.22)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: [to Ruby] You bitch! You lying... BITCH!

Sam Winchester: [after opening the door for Lucifer] Oh my God!
Ruby: Guess again...

[last lines]
Sam Winchester: I'm sorry...
[Lucifer opens the door to Earth]
Dean Winchester: [Grabbing Sam] Sammy, let's go.
Sam Winchester: [Staring at the opening doorway] Dean... he's coming!

Castiel: This is long foretold. This is your...
Dean Winchester: Destiny? Don't give me that holy crap.

Dean Winchester: [reading Chuck's prophetic story] St. Mary's, what is that, a convent?
Chuck Shurley: Yeah, but you guys aren't supposed to be there. You're not in this story!
Castiel: Yeah well, we're making it up as we go.
[Brilliant light appears in the window, the room starts to shake]
Chuck Shurley: What? Aw man, not again!
Castiel: [to Dean] It's the archangel! I'll hold him off, I'll hold them ALL off! Just stop Sam!
[He presses a hand to Dean's forehead; Dean finds himself in the convent]

[Dean is trying vainly to contact Sam on his phone, Castiel appears]
Castiel: You can't reach him, Dean. You're outside your coverage zone.
Dean Winchester: What're you gonna do to Sam?
Castiel: [sighs] Nothing. He's gonna do it to himself.
Dean Winchester: What's that supposed to mean?
[pause, Castiel looks down]
Dean Winchester: Oh right, right, gotta toe the company line. Why're you here, Cas?
Castiel: We've been through much together, you and I. And I just wanted... to say, I'm sorry it ended like this.
Dean Winchester: [stares at him] Sorry?
[he punches Castiel in the face, turns away nursing his hand]
Dean Winchester: It's Armageddon, Cas, you need a bigger word than "sorry"!
Castiel: Try to understand, this is long foretold. This is your...
Dean Winchester: Destiny? Don't gimme that holy crap. Destiny, God's plan, it's all a bunch of lies, you poor stupid sonofabitch! It's just a way for your bosses to keep me and keep you in line! You know what's real? People. Families. *That's* real. And you're gonna watch 'em all burn?
Castiel: [Advancing] What is so worth saving? I see nothing but pain here! I see inside you, I see your guilt, your anger, confusion. In paradise, all is forgiven. You'll be at peace. Even with Sam.
[he looks away, but Dean leans slightly, catching his eyes again]
Dean Winchester: You can take your peace, and shove it up your lily-white ass. 'Cause I'll take the pain, and the guilt, I'll even take Sam as is. It's a lot better than bein' some Stepford Bitch in paradise! This is simple, Cas!
[Castiel turns away]
Dean Winchester: No more crap about bein' a good soldier, there is a right and there is a wrong here, and you know it!
[grabs Castiel and spins him back around]
Dean Winchester: Look at me! You *know* it! Now you were gonna help me once, weren't you? You were gonna warn me about all this before they dragged you back to Bible Camp. Help me, now. *Please!*
Castiel: [pained] What would you have me do?
Dean Winchester: Get me to Sam, we can stop this before it's too late!
Castiel: I do that, we will all be hunted. We'll *all* be killed!
Dean Winchester: [earnestly] If there is anything worth dyin' for, this is it.
[pause, Castiel slowly shakes his head, looks away]
Dean Winchester: [angry] You spineless, *soulless* sonofabitch. What do you care about dyin', you're already dead. We're done.
Castiel: [pleading] Dean...
Dean Winchester: We're *done*!
[Castiel vanishes]

[Castiel appears, slams Dean against the wall with a hand over his mouth and pulls out a knife. Castiel stares hard at Dean, who nods slightly. Castiel takes his hand off Dean's mouth, bares an arm and cuts himself, uses the blood to draw a sigil on the wall]
Zachariah: [appearing suddenly] Castiel! Would you mind explaining just what the Hell you're doing?
[he advances threateningly; Castiel slams his palm onto the sigil; Zachariah vanishes in a flash of light]
Castiel: He won't be gone long. We have to find Sam now.
Dean Winchester: Where is he?
Castiel: [handing Dean the knife] I don't know, but I know who does. We have to stop him, Dean. From killing Lilith.
Dean Winchester: But Lilith's gonna break the final seal!
Castiel: Lilith *is* the final seal! She dies, the End begins!

"Supernatural: Fresh Blood (#3.7)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: You know man, I'm sick and tired of your old stupid kamikazee trick.
Dean Winchester: Whoa whoa whoa. Kamikazee? I'm more like a ninja.
Sam Winchester: That's not funny.
Dean Winchester: It's a little Funny.
Sam Winchester: No it's not.

Sam Winchester: How the hell did he know where to find us?
Dean Winchester: ...That bitch.
[pulls out phone and dials]
Dean Winchester: Hi Bela.
Bela Talbot: Hello Dean.
Dean Winchester: Question for you - when you called me yesterday, it wasn't to thank me for saving your ass, was it?
Bela Talbot: No. Gordon Walker paid me to tell him where you were.
Dean Winchester: Excuse me?
Bela Talbot: Well, he had a gun on me. What else was I supposed to do?
Dean Winchester: [angry] I don't know, maybe pick up the phone and tell us that a raging psychopath was dropping by!
Bela Talbot: I did fully intend to call, I just got a bit side-tracked.

Dean Winchester: Man, I must have check three dozen motels, empty buildings, warehouses...
Sam Winchester: Yeah, me too.
[shakes his head]
Sam Winchester: Big city.
Dean Winchester: It's like a giant haystack, and Gordon's a deadly needle.

Gordon Walker: You're not human, Sam.
Sam Winchester: Look who's talking.

Sam Winchester: I wish you would drop the show and be my brother again, 'cause... just 'cause.

Sam Winchester: Dude. Drop the attitude, Dean. Quit turning everything into a punchline. And you know something else? Stop trying to act like you're not afraid.
Dean Winchester: I'm not.
Sam Winchester: You're lying. And you may as well drop it, 'cause I can see right through you.
Dean Winchester: You have no idea what you're talking about.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I do. You're scared, Dean. You're scared because you're year is running out, and you're still going to Hell, and you're freaked.
Dean Winchester: And how do you know that?
Sam Winchester: Because I know you!
Dean Winchester: Really?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, because I've been following you around my entire life. I mean, I've been looking up to you since I was four, Dean. Studying you, trying to be just like my big brother.So, yeah, I know you. Better than anyone else in the entire world. And this is exactly how you act when you're terrified. And, I mean, I can't blame you. It's just...
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: It's just, I wish you would drop the show and be my brother again, 'cause... just 'cause.

"Supernatural: Reading is Fundamental (#7.21)" (2012)
Castiel: Can you not see that? This is the handwriting of Metatron.
Sam Winchester: Metatron? You saying a Transformer wrote that?
Dean Winchester: No. That's Megatron.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: The Transformer - It's Megatron.
Sam Winchester: What?

Sam Winchester: Here. Leviathan cannot be slain but by a bone of a righteous mortal washed in the three bloods of the fallen. Uh... it says we need to start with the blood of a fallen angel.
Castiel: Well, you know me. I'm always happy to bleed for the Winchesters.
Dean Winchester: What are you gonna do, Cas?
Castiel: I don't know. Isn't that amazing?

Castiel: Did you know that a cat's penis is sharply barbed along its shaft? I know for a fact the females were not consulted about that.

Kevin Tran: You're one of the Angels?
Castiel: [touches Kevin's nose] Boop.

Meg: He's been like the naked guy at the rave ever since he woke up. Totally useless.
Castiel: Will you look at her? My caretaker. All of that thorny pain. So beautiful.
Meg: We've been over this. I don't like poetry. Put up or shut up.

Castiel: Pull my finger.

"Supernatural: What Is and What Should Never Be (#2.20)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: Why is it our job to save everybody?

Dean Winchester: Yeah. Lucky me. I've got to tell you, though, man - you had Jess. Mom was gonna have grandkids.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, but, Dean - it wasn't real.
Dean Winchester: I know. But I wanted to stay. I wanted to stay so bad. I mean, ever since Dad... all I... all I can think about is how much this job's cost us. We've lost so much. And we've sacrificed so much.
Sam Winchester: But people are alive because of you. It's worth it, Dean. It is. It's not fair, and, you know, it hurts like hell, but it's worth it.

Sam Winchester: [Trying to wake him] Dean!
Dean Winchester: [waking up disoriented] Auntie Em? There's no place like home...

Dean Winchester: Bitch.
Sam Winchester: What're you calling me a bitch for?
Dean Winchester: You're supposed to say "jerk".
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Never mind.

Dean Winchester: Bitch.
Sam Winchester: Why'd you call me a bitch?
Dean Winchester: It's this thing we do. I say bitch and you say... nevermind.

Sam Winchester: Since when do you call me Sammy? Dean, come on. We don't talk outside of holidays.
Dean Winchester: We don't? Well we should. I mean, you're my brother.
Sam Winchester: You're my brother? You know, that's what you said when you snaked my ATM card, or when you bailed on my graduation, or when you hooked up with Rachel Nave.
Dean Winchester: Who?
Sam Winchester: My prom date. On prom night.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, that does kind of sound like me.

"Supernatural: Simon Said (#2.5)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: Dean! Andy's got the Impala!
Dean Winchester: I know! He just sort of asked me for it, and I, I let him take it!
Sam Winchester: You what?
Dean Winchester: He full-on Obi-Wanned me!

Dean Winchester: I call do-over.
Sam Winchester: What are you, 7?

Sam Winchester: So I'm a freak now.
Dean Winchester: You've always been a freak.

Andrew Gallagher: Tell the truth.
Sam Winchester: That's what I'm...
Dean Winchester: We hunt demons.
Andrew Gallagher: What?
Sam Winchester: Dean.
Dean Winchester: Demons. Spirits. Things your worst nightmares wouldn't even touch. Sam here is my brother.
Sam Winchester: Dean, shut up!
Dean Winchester: I'm trying. He's psychic, kinda like you. Well, not really like you, but, see, he thinks you're a murderer, and he's afraid he's going to become one himself, because you're all part of something that's terrible, and I hope the hell he's wrong, but I'm starting to get a little bit scared that he might be right.

Dean Winchester: What's wrong?
Sam Winchester: Nothing.
Dean Winchester: Sam, you look like you're sucking on a lemon. What's wrong?

Sam Winchester: We need your help, Ash.
Ash: Well, then. I guess I need my pants.

"Supernatural: The Usual Suspects (#2.7)" (2006)
Dean Winchester: Did she look familiar to you?
Sam Winchester: No. Why?
Dean Winchester: I don't know. Anyway, you hungry?
Sam Winchester: No,
Dean Winchester: Man, for some reason, I could really go for some pea soup.

Dean Winchester: So Scully... what do ya think?
Sam Winchester: I'm not Scully, you're Scully
Dean Winchester: Naw... I'm Mulder... You're a red headed woman

Jeff Krause: [Giving Sam a message from Dean] I hope that was meaningful, but I'd like to discuss your case now.
Sam Winchester: [Inviting him to sit] Sure thing, Matlock.
Jeff Krause: You two really are brothers, aren't you?

Sam Winchester: [while digging out Claire's body] You know, this is bothering me.
Det. Diana Ballard: Well, you are digging up a corpse.
Sam Winchester: No, not that. That's, uh, that's pretty par for the course, actually.

Sam Winchester: Well, we've got to salt and burn her bones. Its the only way to put her spirit to rest.
[Smiles widely]
Det. Diana Ballard: [Deadpan] Of course it is.

Dean Winchester: Hey, uh, you wouldn't happen to know where my car is, by chance?
Det. Diana Ballard: It's at the impound yard down on Robertson... Don't even think about it.
Sam Winchester: It's okay, it's all right, don't worry. We'll, uh, we'll just improvise. I mean, we're pretty good at that.
Det. Diana Ballard: Yeah. I've noticed.

"Supernatural: The Third Man (#6.3)" (2010)
Officer Ed Colfax: Who the hell are you?
Sam Winchester: We're the Fed, Ed, here to ask you a few questions about your partner's death.

Dean Winchester: Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray to Castiel to get his feathery ass down here.
Sam Winchester: You're an idiot.
Dean Winchester: Stay positive.
Sam Winchester: Oh, I am positive.

Sam Winchester: Hello?
Castiel: Uh, that is still the term...?
Sam Winchester: I spent all that time trying to get through to you. Dean calls once, and now it's,
[mocking Cas]
Sam Winchester: "Hello."
Castiel: Yes.
Sam Winchester: So, what, you like him better or something?
Castiel: Dean and I do share a more profound bond.
Castiel: [to Dean] I wasn't gonna mention it...

Castiel: What... is all this? What are you doing?
Balthazar: Whatever I want. This morning I had a ménage à... What's French for twelve?

Dean Winchester: There's too many angels, Cass! I don't know who's on first, what's on second...
Castiel: What *is* "second"?
Dean Winchester: Don't start that.

Castiel: [impatient, with "air quotes"] Sam, Dean, my "people skills" are "rusty". Pardon me, but I've spent the last "year" as a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent. But believe me, you *do not* want that weapon down here. Help me find it. Or more people will die.

"Supernatural: Do You Believe in Miracles (#9.23)" (2014)
Dean Winchester: What happened with you being okay with this?
Sam Winchester: I lied.
Dean Winchester: Ain't that a bitch.

Sam Winchester: An hour ago, we were ready to throw Dean into a padded cell. And now you say he's our best chance?
Castiel: Hear him out, Sam.
Sam Winchester: Oh right, excuse me. Sorry, guys. Sorry I'm a little less than eager to hear that our best chance is, is arming the warhead and hoping it hits the mark! This is not a bomb we're talking about. This is my *brother*!

Dean Winchester: [after being beaten and stabbed by Metatron, Dean is being carried out of the building by Sam] Sam, hold up. Hold Up.
[Sam stops and lets Dean sit down]
Dean Winchester: I gotta say somethin'.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: [Smiling, looking into his brother's eyes] I'm proud of us.
[Dean slumps into Sam's arms]

Metatron: Well played, Castiel. Obviously, you and Gadreel managed to turn a few dead-enders against me.
Castiel: Gadreel is dead.
Metatron: Ah. So Gadreel bites the dust. And the angel tablet - arguably the most powerful instrument in the history of the universe - is in pieces, and for what again? Oh, that's right - to save Dean Winchester. That was your goal, right? I mean, you draped yourself in the flag of heaven, but ultimately, it was about saving one human, right? Well, guess what. He's dead, too. And you're sitting in my chair.

Castiel: You will never get away with this.
Metatron: Get away with what? You told a silly story to a group of less-than-believers. I'll clean up your mess in an hour.
Castiel: You give our brothers and sisters far too little credit. They will soon learn that you have been playing them.
Metatron: And then? They will do nothing because they are frightened little sheep following my crook wherever it leads. And where I'm taking them, back to our rightful place atop this mountain of human shame and excrement - when that happens, trust me, they're not gonna care how they get there.

Metatron: You know, while you could never pull it together, Castiel, why you're sitting here while your grace slowly burning away and your reputation long extinguished? No curiosity. You didn't read enough. You never learned how to tell a good story.
Castiel: But you did.

"Supernatural: Heaven and Hell (#4.10)" (2008)
[last lines]
Dean Winchester: They sliced and carved and tore me in ways that you- Until there was nothing left. And then suddenly, I would be whole again, like magic. Just so they could start in all over. And Alastair, at the end of every day, every one, he would come over and he would make me an offer to take me off the rack if I put souls on. If I started the torture. And every day I told him to stick it where the sun shines. For thirty years I told him. But then I couldn't do it anymore, Sammy. I couldn't. Then I got off that rack, God help me I got right off it, and I started ripping them apart. I lost count of how many souls. The things that I did to them.
Sam Winchester: Dean... Dean, look you held out for thirty years. That's longer than any one would've.
Dean Winchester: How I feel, this... inside me, I wish I couldn't feel anything, Sammy. I wish I couldn't feel a damn thing.

Dean Winchester: It wasn't four months, you know.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: It was four months up here, but down there... I don't know, time's different. It was more like forty years.

Sam Winchester: Where's Bobby?
Dean Winchester: The Dominican. Said we break anything, we buy it.
Sam Winchester: Is he working a job?
Dean Winchester: God, I hope so. Otherwise, he's at Hedonism in a banana hammock and a trucker cap.
Sam Winchester: Now that's seared in my brain.

Ruby: [at Dean's chuckle] What?
Dean Winchester: Nothing. It's just, an angel and a demon riding in the back seat. It's like the setup to a bad joke. Or a Penthouse forum letter.
Sam Winchester: Dude, reality. Porn.
Dean Winchester: You call this reality?

Dean Winchester: We're here!
Sam Winchester: Pamela, hey!
Pamela Barnes: Sam?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, it's me. It's Sam.
Pamela Barnes: Sam?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Pamela Barnes: Sam, is that you?
Sam Winchester: I'm right here.
Pamela Barnes: Ohh... Know how I can tell?
[grabs Sam's butt, he is taken aback]
Pamela Barnes: That perky little ass of yours. You could bounce a nickel off that thing! Of course I know it's you, Grumpy.
[nods toward Ruby and Anna]
Pamela Barnes: Same way I know that's a demon, and that poor girl is Anna. And that you've been eyeing my rack!
[Sam is flustered]
Pamela Barnes: Don't sweat it, kiddo.

"Supernatural: Fan Fiction (#10.5)" (2014)
Sam Winchester: I was a theater kid.
Dean Winchester: Barely. You did "Our Town", which was cool, but then you did that crappy musical.
Sam Winchester: That - "Oklahoma"? Hugh Jackman got cast off "Oklahoma".
Dean Winchester: You ran tech, Wolverine.

Sam Winchester: [Unsettled after seeing two actors portraying them and showing fake FBI badges] I'm, uh, Special Agent Smith. This is my partner, Special Agent...
Dean Winchester: Smith.
Sam Winchester: Smith. No relation.

Dean Winchester: [Deeply insulted] There is no singing in Supernatural.
Maeve: Well, this is Marie's interpretation...
Dean Winchester: Aha! Well... I mean, if there was singing, you know, and that's a big if. *If* there was singing, it would be classic rock! Not this... Andrew Floyd Webber *crap*!
Sam Winchester: [Under his breath to Dean] Andrew Lloyd Webber.
Dean Winchester: What?
Marie: [Proudly] Well, you know, we do sing a cover of Carry On Wayward Son in the second act.
Dean Winchester: [Only slightly mollified] Oh.
Sam Winchester: Really?
Dean Winchester, Marie: [to Sam in unison] It's a classic!

Dean Winchester: I'm gonna throw up.
Sam Winchester: [Looking around, smiling, charmed with the high school atmosphere] I mean, I gotta say, it's kinda charming. The, the production value and the at-
[Turning back to Dean and the stone cold look on his face]
Sam Winchester: No? N- no.
[Clears his throat and plasters a serious, disapproving look on his own face]
Sam Winchester: I'm gonna check for EMF. You, you... look for, uh, cursed objects.

Sam Winchester: I don't understand.
Dean Winchester: Me neither.
Sam Winchester: I mean, shouldn't it be *Dea*stiel?
Dean Winchester: Really? That's your issue with this?
Sam Winchester: No. Of course, it's not my issue. You know... how about... Sastiel? Samstiel?
Dean Winchester: Okay. Alright. You know what? You're gonna do that thing... where you just shut the hell up. Forever.
Sam Winchester: [Chuckles, then... ] Look. Man, no EMF, no hex bags. None of the props are even remotely hinky. Other than the Charlie Kaufman of it all, I got nothin'. You?
Dean Winchester: No, Miss Chandler's office was just a pile of empty bottles and regret. She's probably face down in a bar somewhere. Or a ditch. Alright, so what? This, this whole... this whole musical thing, everything, it's just... is it... It's all a coincidence? There is no case?
Sam Winchester: Unless you're seein' somethin' I'm not. No, Dean, there's no case here.
Dean Winchester: [Upset, but resigned to Sam's logic] Okay.
[He walks around the car to get in while Sam gets a thoughtful look on his face]
Sam Winchester: [Turns to Dean as a thought occurs] Casdean?
Dean Winchester: Shut your face! Get in the car!

"Supernatural: Folsom Prison Blues (#2.19)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: You wanna maybe open it up after your done patting yourself on the back.

Dean Winchester: Well my room mate doesn't say, how's yours?
Sam Winchester: He just keeps starring at me in a way that makes me really uneasy.
Dean Winchester: Sounds like you're making new friends.

Sam Winchester: You heard in the yard?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: Dean, doesn't it bother you how well you seem to fit in here?
Sam Winchester: No, not really.

Sam Winchester: [as they walk into the prison] This is, without a doubt, the dumbest, craziest thing we've ever done... And that's in a long, storied career of dumb and crazy.
Dean Winchester: Calm down. It's all part of the plan.

Randall: How did you wind up in here?
Sam Winchester: I've got a brother who's an idiot.
Randall: That'll do it.

"Supernatural: Frontierland (#6.18)" (2011)
Dean Winchester: I'll stay here, hook up with the posse.
[Dean tries to keep a serious face]
Dean Winchester: Because you know me, I'm a posse magnet. I mean, I love posse.
Dean Winchester: Make that into a T-shirt.
Sam Winchester: You done?
[Dean breaks into a smirk]

Castiel: You only have 24 hours.
Sam Winchester: What? Why?
Castiel: Well, the answer to your question can best be expressed as a series of partial differential equations...
Bobby Singer: Aim lower.

Sam Winchester: Look, just because you're obsessed with all that Wild West stuff.
Dean Winchester: No, I'm not.
Sam Winchester: You have a fetish.
Dean Winchester: Shut up. I like old movies.
Sam Winchester: You can recite every Clint Eastwood movie ever made, line-for-line.
Bobby Singer: Even the monkey movies?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. Especially the monkey movies.
Dean Winchester: His name is Clyde.

Sam Winchester: [steps in horse manure] Oh, damn it. Come on.
Dean Winchester: You know what that is?
Sam Winchester: Yeah. It's horse...
Dean Winchester: Authenticity.

Bobby Singer: Well, there's gotta be something that can juice you up. A spell, something.
Castiel: There is one thing that might work but it's extremely dangerous.
Bobby Singer: Shocker. So lay it on me.
Castiel: It's your soul.
Bobby Singer: What do want me to do? Make another deal? Seal it with a kiss?
Castiel: I need you to let me touch it.
Bobby Singer: Touch it?
Castiel: The human soul, it's pure energy. If I can siphon some that off, I might be able to bring Sam and Dean back.
Bobby Singer: And the catch is?
Castiel: Doing this like putting your hand in a nuclear reactor. I have to it very gingerly.
Bobby Singer: Or?
Castiel: Or you'll explode.
Bobby Singer: Wow. Keep both hands on the wheel.

"Supernatural: Hunted (#2.10)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: [Ava has told Sam about her visions] I don't believe this.
Ava: Oh, of course you don't. You think I'm a total nutjob!
Sam Winchester: Wait, no, no, no, I mean... You must be one of us.
Ava: Sorry, one of... One of who?
Sam Winchester: One of the psychics, like me. Look, Ava, I have visions too, all right? So, so - so we're connected.
Ava: [laughs] Okay, so, you're nuts. That's great.

Sam Winchester: Are you okay?
Ava: Am I okay?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Ava: I just helped you steal some dead guy's confidential psych files.
Ava: I'm awesome!

Sam Winchester: These are .223 caliber. Subsonic grounds. The guy must have put a suppressor on the rifle.
Ava: Dude. Who are you?

Dean Winchester: Dude, you ever take off like that again...
Sam Winchester: What? You'll kill me?
Dean Winchester: That is so not funny.
[Sam laughs]

Sam Winchester: Put the gun down!
Gordon Walker: You shouldn't take your shoes off around here, you could get tetnis.
Sam Winchester: I said 'Put the gun down'!

"Supernatural: My Bloody Valentine (#5.14)" (2010)
Castiel: What I'm saying is Cupid has gone rogue, and we have to stop him, before he kills again.
Sam Winchester: Naturally.

[as a happy, fat and very naked Cupid grabs and hugs the brothers and Castiel]
Dean Winchester: This is a fight? Are we in a fight?
Castiel: This is... their handshake.
Dean Winchester: I don't like it!
Castiel: No one likes it.

Castiel: [about the hamburger he's eating] These make me very happy.
Dean Winchester: Seriously how many is that?
Castiel: I lost count, but it's in the low hundreds.

Castiel: Where is your hunger?
Dean Winchester: Huh?
Castiel: Well, slowly but surely, everyone in this town is falling prey to famine, but so far you seem unaffected.
Dean Winchester: Hey, when I want a drink, I drink. When I want sex, I go get it. The same goes for a sandwich or a fight.
Castiel: So, you're saying you're just well adjusted?
Dean Winchester: God, no. I'm just well fed.

[Dean calls Castiel on his cell phone to tell him where they are]
Dean Winchester: Cas, it's Dean... Yeah, room 31C, basement level, St. James Medical Cente...
[Dean walks right into Castiel]
Castiel: [through his cell phone, while looking at Dean] I'm there now.
Dean Winchester: ...Yeah, I get that.
Castiel: ...I'm gonna hang up now...

"Supernatural: Death Takes a Holiday (#4.15)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: Let's talk to someone who might.
Dean Winchester: Well, last I checked Huggy Bear ain't available.
Sam Winchester: No dude, the kid.
Dean Winchester: The kid? The kid's a doornail.
Sam Winchester: Exactly. Look, if he's the last person to die around here, then maybe he's seen something. We should talk to him.
Dean Winchester: I love how matter of fact you are about that. Strange lives.

Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: This job is jacked, that's what.
Sam Winchester: How so?
Dean Winchester: You want me to gank a monster or torch a corpse? Hey let's light it up, right? But-but this? If we fix whatever this is, people are gonna start dropping dead. Good people.
Sam Winchester: Look, I don't want 'em to die either, Dean, but there's a natural order.
Dean Winchester: You're kidding, right?
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: You don't see the irony in that? I mean, you and me, we're like the poster boys of the unnatural order. All we do is ditch death.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, but the normal rules don't really apply to us, do they?
Dean Winchester: We're no different than anybody else.
Sam Winchester: I'm infected with demon blood. You've been to Hell. Look, I know you wanna think of yourself as Joe the plumber Dean, but you're not. Neither am I. The sooner you accept that, the better off you're gonna be.
Dean Winchester: Joe the plumber was a douche.

Dean Winchester: [as a spirit, sticks his hand through Sam] Am I making you uncomfortable?
Sam Winchester: Get out of me.
Dean Winchester: You're such a prude.

Sam Winchester: Look, this isn't going to be easy to hear, but you're dead. You're a spirit. Us too.
Cole Griffiths: Yeah, thanks Haley Joel. I know I'm dead.

Sam Winchester: Well, Pamela, you're a sight for sore eyes.
Pamela Barnes: [showing her fake eyes] Aw, that's sweet, Grumpy. What do you say to deaf people?

"Supernatural: Baby (#11.4)" (2015)
Dean Winchester: Hey, Cas, tell me you got something that doesn't involve chicks in prison.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] Bet you never thought you'd say that out loud.

Sam Winchester: Goodnight, jerk.
Dean Winchester: 'Night, bitch.

Sam Winchester: I mean, even Swazye wouldn't come to this roadhouse.
Dean Winchester: Okay, first of all, never use Swazye's name in vain, okay? Ever.

Dean Winchester: All right, well, thanks, Cas. Good work. Way to come off the bench.
Castiel: What bench?

Castiel: I'm not sure how orange correlates with black in a way that's new.
Dean Winchester: Step away from the Netflix.

"Supernatural: Devil's Trap (#1.22)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: I wanna know why. Why'd you do it?
John Winchester: [possessed by demon] You mean, why did I kill Mommy and pretty, little Jess?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.

Dean Winchester: This sucks out loud.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, tell me about it.

Sam Winchester: But, the holy water?
John Winchester: [possessed by demon] You think something like that works on something like me?

Sam Winchester: I'm gonna kill you!
John Winchester: [possessed by demon] Oh, that'd be a neat trick. In fact, make the gun float to you there, psychic boy.

Dean Winchester: Hey, Sam.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: You know that guy I shot? There was a person in there.
Sam Winchester: You didn't have a choice, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I know. That's not what bothers me.
Sam Winchester: Then what does?
Dean Winchester: Killin' that guy, killin' Meg... I didn't hesitate. I didn't even flinch. I mean, for you or Dad, the things I'm willin' to do or kill, it's just, uh... it scares me sometimes.

"Supernatural: O Brother, Where Art Thou? (#11.9)" (2015)
Sam Winchester: I promised Dean I'd call.
Rowena: And I promised Lincoln a fun night at the theater, things change!

Sam Winchester: [concerning God] All current indications of His presence are... that there are no current indications of His presence.

Sam Winchester: You want a vessel.
Lucifer: One who's strong enough to hold me, handy, and available. Catch my drift?

Lucifer: Hey Sam Winchester.
Lucifer: Did you miss me? I bet you did.
Lucifer: I have to say, you're extraordinarily calm given the circumstances.
Sam Winchester: [desperately trying to stay calm] It's pretty much exactly how God told me it was gonna be. Guess I just have to go with it.
Lucifer: Oh, that would make so much sense if it was God that was doing the talking. See Sam, the Darkness descended, the impact on Hell was massive, the cage was damaged. Thorugh the fissures I was able to reach out. It wasn't God inside your head, Sam. It was me.

Lucifer: Upper bunk? Lower bunk? Or do you wanna share?

"Supernatural: Girls, Girls, Girls (#10.7)" (2014)
Sam Winchester: [to Dean] We detoured eight hours so you could get laid?

Sam Winchester: She told us everything, abduction, forced prostitution, pretty gnarly even for a demon, girls, how many are there?
Handler: Just me and Shaylene
Shaylene Johnson: He's lying, I heard him on the phone, there's a brothel, they told me what you are, demon from Hell!
Handler: Better than trash on the street

Sam Winchester: Whatever you want, I'm burning up just thinking about you
Dean Winchester: It gets raunchier
Dean Winchester: I can see that, it's like a penthouse letter

Castiel: The mission comes first - always.

Hannah: What of the humans we sacrifice in the name of the mission? What of them? We always said humans were the original mission, we should put the humans first
Castiel: What brought this on?
Hannah: Being here on Earth, working with you, the look on his face, her husband, anger, disbelief, Caroline was screaming out from inside me, to take her life back, I've felt things, hunger, passions, taking a shower, the water on my skin, nothing compared to what I felt, these feelings aren't for me, these feelings aren't for us

"Supernatural: Pilot (#1.1)" (2005)
[last lines]
Sam Winchester: [throwing shotgun into the trunk of the Impala] We've got work to do.

[repeated lines]
Sam Winchester: Jerk.
Dean Winchester: Bitch.

Sam Winchester: When I told Dad I was scared of the thing in my closet, he gave me a .45!
Dean Winchester: Well, what was he supposed to do?
Sam Winchester: I was *nine* years old! He was supposed to say "don't be afraid of the dark!"
Dean Winchester: Don't be afraid of the dark? What are you, kidding me? Of course you should be afraid of the dark. You know what's out there!

Sam Winchester: That sounds about right. I swear, man, you've gotta update your cassette tape collection.
[There are at least a dozen cassettes in the box on SAM's lap; some have album art, others are hand-labeled]
Dean Winchester: Why?
Sam Winchester: Well, for one, they're cassette tapes.

Sam Winchester: Jerk

"Supernatural: All Dogs Go to Heaven (#6.8)" (2010)
Skinwalker: Go to hell.
Sam Winchester: Already been. Didn't agree with me.

Sam Winchester: [to the Skinwalker] Why shack up with a family? Is it a kinky thing?
Sam Winchester: Do you like to play with your food?

Dean Winchester: [to Lucky] Now we can do this the easy way
[holds up a stack of clothes]
Dean Winchester: or the hard way
[holds up training collar]
Dean Winchester: .
[Sam snickers, Dean gives him a look]
Sam Winchester: What? Soul or not that's funnny.

Sam Winchester: I'd double cross us.
[Dean gives him a look]
Sam Winchester: Just making conversation.

"Supernatural: The Real Ghostbusters (#5.9)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: What do you think?
Dean Winchester: I don't think he's a good enough actor to be acting.

Sam Winchester: Oh, and Chuck, if you want keep writing Supernatural books, it's okay with us.
Chuck Shurley: Wow. Really?
Sam Winchester: No, not really. We have guns and we'll find you.

[reading off a sheet of paper at the Supernatural convention: "The LARPing has started!"]
Sam Winchester: Dad's journal: Dear Sam and Dean, this hotel is haunted. You must hunt down the ghost. Interview witnesses, discover clues and find the bones. The first team to do so wins a fifty dollar gift card to Sizzler. Love, Dad.

[Dean pulls out his gun from its holster while talking to two hardcore Supernatural fans who are giving them a hard time and threaten them with a 'gun']
Sam Winchester: Dean.
Dean Winchester: What? They're freakin' annoying.

"Supernatural: Sam, Interrupted (#5.11)" (2010)
Sam Winchester: [after Dean has made out with a mental patient] Dude, you *cannot* hit that.
Dean Winchester: Oh, so torn!

[Sam and Dean are posing as brothers Alex and Edward Van Halen]
Dr. Aaron Fuller: You were referred to me by a Dr. Babar in Chicago.
Dean Winchester: That's right.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: Isn't there a... children's book about an elephant named Babar?
Dean Winchester: I don't know. I don't have any elephant books. Look, Doctor, I-I think the doc was in over his head on this one 'cause my brother's, uh...
Dean Winchester: [pauses, then spins his finger around his ear and makes the "cuckoo" whistle]
Dr. Aaron Fuller: Okay, fine. Thank you, That- that's really not necessary.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: [to Sam] Why don't *you* tell me how you're feeling, Alex.
Sam Winchester: I'm fine.
Sam Winchester: [scoffs] I mean, okay, a little depressed, I guess.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: All right. Any idea why?
Sam Winchester: Probably because I started the apocalypse.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: [taken aback] "The apocalypse"?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, that's right.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: [the Doctor looks at Dean, who smirks, then back to Sam] And you started it.
Sam Winchester: Well, yeah, I...
Sam Winchester: [sighs] I killed this demon, Lilith, and I accidentally freed Lucifer from Hell, so now he's topside and we're tryin' to stop him.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: W-who is?
Sam Winchester: Me. And him. And, uh, this one angel.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: Oh, you mean like a- like an angel on your shoulder.
Sam Winchester: [matter-of-factly] No, no. His name is Castiel. He wears a trench coat.
Dean Winchester: See what I mean, doc? I mean, the kid's been beating himself up over this thing for months. The apocalypse wasn't his fault.
Dr. Aaron Fuller: [again taken aback] It's not?
Dean Winchester: No. There was this other demon, Ruby. She got him addicted to demon blood. I mean, near the end, he was practically chugging the stuff. My brother's not evil. He's was just... high. Yeah? So could you fix him up so we can get back to traveling around the country and hunting monsters?
Dr. Aaron Fuller: [holds up a "one moment" finger, picks the phone handset up to his head, and presses a button] Erma? Cancel my lunch.

[Sam is high on medication]
Dean Winchester: Hey.
Sam Winchester: [In a slurry voice] No. No... I'm not okay. I... I... I am *awesome*.
Dean Winchester: They give you something?
Sam Winchester: Oh... Oh, yeah. They gave me... *everything*! It's... It's... spectacu... lacular...
[Sam giggles]
Dean Winchester: [Shaking his head] You always were a happy drunk!

Sam Winchester: [Taps dean on the nose] Boop.

"Supernatural: In the Beginning (#4.3)" (2008)
Castiel: Your brother is headed down a dangerous road, Dean, and we're not sure where it leads. So stop it. Or we will.

Castiel: Destiny can't be changed, Dean. All roads lead to the same destination.

Dean Winchester: [referring to killing the Yellow-Eyed Demon in 1973] Alright, if I do this then the family curse breaks, right? Mom and Dad live happily ever after, and-and Sam and I grow up playing little league and chasing tail?
Castiel: You realize, if you do alter the future, your father, you, Sam, you'll never become hunters. And all those people you saved, they'll die.
Dean Winchester: I realize.
Castiel: And you don't care?
Dean Winchester: Oh, I care. I care a lot. But these are my parents. I'm not gonna let them die again. I can't. Not if I can stop it.

Castiel: [Dean wakes up with a start after dreaming of Hell] Hello, Dean. What were *you* dreaming about?

"Supernatural: Family Remains (#4.11)" (2009)
Dean Winchester: So Grandaddy was also the baby daddy?
Sam Winchester: Yup.
Dean Winchester: Dude, that's just gross.

Dean Winchester: Crap... So, what now?
Sam Winchester: We could tell them the truth.
Dean Winchester: Really?
Sam Winchester: No, not really.

Sam Winchester: It's not just a girl. It's Psyco Nell. I'm telling you, man. Humans.

Sam Winchester: ...That's all she ever talks about: being pregnant, being ashamed of being pregnant.
Dean Winchester: Jeez, rent Juno and got over it.

"Supernatural: Blood Brother (#8.5)" (2012)
Sam Winchester: So, you think I'm creepy?
Amelia Richardson: I think it's creepy that you buy all of your clothing at army surplus. White supremacists do that.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, but I'm *not*.
Amelia Richardson: Drifting serial killers do that.
Sam Winchester: Fair enough.

Sam Winchester: You did try to kill his mother.
Dean Winchester: I was trying to kill Crowley! Who just happened to be wearing Kevin's mother at the time.
[Sam gives annoyed look]
Dean Winchester: Well there's a difference!
Sam Winchester: Apparently not to Kevin. Maybe because, oh yea, it's his MOTHER!

Castiel: Well, I think we're clear for the moment. It does present a curious curl in the metaphysics, doesn't it? If you murder a monster in monster heaven, where does it go?
Benny: And this is the crazy aunt I want to take on the road?
Castiel: I am not your aunt.
Benny: What? Really?
Castiel: I have no possible relationship with your sibling offspring.
Benny: Now you're kidding me.
Dean Winchester: Oh, you two are killing me.

Dean Winchester: What the hell do you know about the value of life? You're a vampire.
Benny: Yep. And I think we both know which of our kinds killed more humans.
Castiel: Well, statistically speaking, that'd be your...
Dean Winchester: Yes, thank you, Cass.

"Supernatural: The Monster at the End of This Book (#4.18)" (2009)
Dean Winchester: [Reading on the computer] There's Sam Girls and Dean Girls and- What's a slash fan?
Sam Winchester: As in Sam-slash-Dean. Together.
Dean Winchester: Like "together" together?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [Horrified] They do know we're brothers, right?
Sam Winchester: Doesn't seem to matter.
Dean Winchester: Oh, come on, that... that's just sick.

Dean Winchester: [about Chuck being a prophet] Him? Really?
Castiel: You should've seen Luke.

Castiel: You must understand why I can't intercede. Prophets are very special, they're protected.
Dean Winchester: I get that.
Castiel: If anything threatens a prophet, anything at all, an archangel will appear to destroy that threat. Archangels are fierce, they're absolute, they're heaven's most terrifying weapon.
Dean Winchester: And these archangels, they're tied to prophets?
Castiel: Yes.
Dean Winchester: So if a prophet was in the same room as a demon...?
Castiel: Then the most fearsome wrath of heaven would rain down on that demon.
[giving a knowing look]
Castiel: Just so you understand why I can't help.
Dean Winchester: Thanks, Cas.
Castiel: Good luck.

Castiel: Dean, let him go! This man is to be protected.
Dean Winchester: Why?
Castiel: He is a prophet of the Lord.

"Supernatural: Stairway to Heaven (#9.22)" (2014)
Hannah: Sir, this morning, Josiah wasn't at roll call.
Sam Winchester: Uh, roll call? You... hold a roll call?
Castiel: They like to hear me say their names.
Dean Winchester: I know a couple of women like that.

Castiel: [Referring to a code written above a door to an old building] It's Enokian. I believe it's some sort of riddle. Why is six afraid of seven? Now... I assume it's because... seven is a prime number. And prime numbers can be intimidating.
Sam Winchester: It's because seven ate nine.
[the door opens]
Castiel: It's word play. And the answer is the key like the Doors of Durin in Lord of the Rings.
Sam Winchester: Wait a second. You know about The Lord of the Rings?
Castiel: I'm very pop culture savvy now.

Sam Winchester: So. We gonna... Are we gonna talk about this or what?
Dean Winchester: About what? Yeah. I lied. But you were being an infant.
Sam Winchester: Wow. Even for you, that apology sucked.
Dean Winchester: Oh, I'm not apologizing. I'm telling you how it's gonna be.
Sam Winchester: [Desperate to get through to his brother] Dean. That blade...
Dean Winchester: That blade is the only thing that can kill Metatron. And I am the only one who can use it! So, from here on out, I'm callin' the shots. Capice?
[Sam is so angry and worried for Dean, he can only stare at him]
Dean Winchester: Look, until I jam that blade through that douche bag's heart, we are not a team. This is a dictatorship. Now, you don't hafta like it, but that's how it's gonna be.

Castiel: You really believe we three will be enough?
Dean Winchester: We always have been.

"Supernatural: I Know What You Did Last Summer (#4.9)" (2008)
Dean Winchester: Sam!
Sam Winchester: Yeah?
Dean Winchester: To much information!
Sam Winchester: Hey, I told you I was coming clean.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, but now I feel dirty.

Dean Winchester: Somethin' major must have happened while I was downstairs cuz I come back and you're BFF with some demon?
Sam Winchester: I told you, Dean. She helped me go after Lilith.
Dean Winchester: [dripping with sarcasm] Well, thanks for the thumb nail. Real vivid. You wanna fill in a little detail?
Sam Winchester: [His sarcasm equals Dean's] Sure, Dean. Let's trade stories. You first. How was Hell? Don't spare the details.

Sam Winchester: I wanna trade places with Dean.
Crossroads Demon: No.
Sam Winchester: [Wild eyed and out of control] Just take me! It's a fair trade!
Crossroads Demon: No.
Sam Winchester: [desperate] Why not? Lilith wants me dead. Just let Dean go and she can have me.

Ruby: Where's the knife?
Dean Winchester: Uh... About that...
Ruby: You're kidding.
Dean Winchester: Hey, don't look at me.
Sam Winchester: [to Dean, for being thrown under the bus] Thanks a lot.
[Dean flashes him his patented 'Dean doesn't give a sh@! so just deal with it.' grin]

"Supernatural: What's Up, Tiger Mommy? (#8.2)" (2012)
Sam Winchester: Mrs. Tran, your friend was possessed by a demon.
Kevin Tran: Have you ever seen The Exorcist?
Linda Tran: Is that what you've been doing all year - watching television? Did you really have to kill her?
Dean Winchester: The demon would have warned Crowley where Kevin was if we didn't.
Linda Tran: And Crowley is the one who kidnapped you?
Kevin Tran: Yeah. He needs me to translate his stupid tablet so he could take over the universe or something.
Dean Winchester: Which is why we need to get it so we can slam the Gates of Hell forever with Crowley inside.
Sam Winchester: So that things like that don't ever happen again.
Linda Tran: Prophet of the Lord, huh? It does have a nice ring to it.

Beau: Oh, if you're worried about the safety of the prophet, rest assured that we have a strict "no casting, no cursing, no supernaturally flicking the two of you against the wall just for the fun of it" policy.
Sam Winchester: Is that right? How'd you manage that?
Beau: Well, I am the right hand of a God, after all - Plutus, specifically.
Dean Winchester: Is that even a planet anymore?
Beau: It's the God of Greed. And my liege has warded these premises against Hell, Heaven and beyond - quite necessary against with some of the players we see. And incidentally, quite possibly the safest place your precious prophet could be. Mm. Well, since time is of the essence, perhaps I'll just go ahead and add a plus-three to the prophet's invitation. Copacetic?
[tosses the invitation and vanishes]
Dean Winchester: Well, thank you, Mr. Peanut!

Dean Winchester: What do we have to bid? What? We can't just show up there empty-handed.
Sam Winchester: Dean, all we have to our names is a few hacked gold cards.
Dean Winchester: All right. Well, then, we have to get creative.
Sam Winchester: Huh. Well...
[Sam looks at the Impala]
Dean Winchester: No. Mnh-mnh. Say it, and I will kill you, your children, and your grandchildren.

Beau: Our next lot, the word of God, capital "G" - very old, very rare.
Crowley: $3 billion.
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: Whoa.
Samandriel: The "Mona Lisa."
Crowley: The real "Mona Lisa", where she's topless.
Samandriel: Vatican City.
Crowley: Alaska.
Beau: Palin and a bridge to nowhere? No, thanks.
Crowley: All right. The moon.
Dean Winchester: You're bidding the moon?
Crowley: Yeah. Claimed it for Hell. You think a man named Buzz gets to go into space without making a deal?

"Supernatural: The Curious Case of Dean Winchester (#5.7)" (2009)
Older Dean Winchester: So, you were gonna just shoot some old guy? Is that it?
Sam Winchester: I didn't know *what* you were. I mean, have you seen you? You look like...
Older Dean Winchester: The old chick in "Titanic." I know. Shut up.
Sam Winchester: I was gonna say "Emperor Palpatine."
[Bobby punches the door open with his wheelchair]
Bobby Singer: I see you met John McCain there.
Sam Winchester: Yeah. Either of you wanna tell me what happened?
Older Dean Winchester: Bobby's an idiot. That's what happened.
Bobby Singer: Hey, nobody asked you to play.
Older Dean Winchester: Right. I should have just let you die.
Bobby Singer: And for damn sure, nobody asked you to *lose*.
Sam Winchester: [grinning] It's like "Grumpy Old Men."
Older Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer: Shut up, Sam!

Bobby Singer: So, you wanna keep emoting or you wanna talk about this solving this little issue of yours? It's gotta be about the chips.
Older Dean Winchester: I slid 'em across, Patrick did his little witchy number, and you prettied up in a hurry.
Sam Winchester: What are you all thinking? Some kind of magic chips or something?
Bobby Singer: Definitely.
Sam Winchester: Remember what he chanted?
Bobby Singer: Yep, every word.
Sam Winchester: All right, then let's find out where he stashes his chips.
Older Dean Winchester: And steal me 50. Benjamin Button's me back into burger shape. What do you think?
Bobby Singer: I think you oughtta put some clothes on.

Sam Winchester: [while Older Dean is trying to crack open a safe] It's like Mission Pathetic, watch out.

Older Dean Winchester: What the hell were you thinking? He's a witch! He's been playing poker since guys wore tights!
Bobby Singer: You just don't get it.
Older Dean Winchester: Yeah, I get it, Bobby. You saw a chance to turn the hands of the clock back and get out of that damn chair. Pretty tempting. I can imagine...
Bobby Singer: No, you can't!
Older Dean Winchester: You got me. I've never been paralyzed. But I'll tell you something... I've been to Hell, and there's an archangel there wanting me to drop the soap.
[Pointing down]
Older Dean Winchester: Look at me! My junk's rustier than yours! You hear me bellyaching?
Sam Winchester: Uh, actually, yeah.

"Supernatural: Alpha and Omega (#11.23)" (2016)
[Dean guzzles down a beer]
Sam Winchester: Really?
Dean Winchester: Really. What? We hit Amara with everything we got, and she walked it off. So...
Sam Winchester: So it's last call?
Dean Winchester: That's right. Look, man. If you got something for me to punch, shoot, or kill, let me know and I'll do it. I'll do it till I die. But how are we suppose to fix the friggin' sun?

Dean Winchester: Really think this is gonna work?
Sam Winchester: Rowena said it would.
Dean Winchester: Oh. Yeah.
Dean Winchester: [as Rowena] It's a Book of the Damned spell, boyos. You take this wee crystal. It'll suck up all the blimey ghosts. Just say the magic word.

Crowley: Well... that was a complete and utter dog's breakfast, wasn't it?
Castiel: I didn't know dogs had breakfast.

Dean Winchester: You know, sometimes me and Sam have got so much going on that... we forget about everyone else.
Castiel: Well, you do live exciting lives.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, that's one word for it. But you're always there, you know? You're the best friend we've ever had. You're our brother, Cass. I want you to know that.
Castiel: Thank you.

"Supernatural: In My Time of Dying (#2.1)" (2006)
[Talking to Dean who's in a coma]
Sam Winchester: ...we were just getting to be brothers again.

[Upon seeing the demolished Impala]
Sam Winchester: Oh man, Dean is gonna be pissed.

Sam Winchester: So what, are we supposed to do, just sit here with our thumbs up our ass?

Dean Winchester: [Dean is a spirit and can't be heard] Dude you need to find some voodoo priest to lay some mojo on me.
Sam Winchester: [Talking to his dad] I don't know, I'll just find some voodoo priest and lay some mojo on him.
[He is unaware where that came from]

"Supernatural: Malleus Maleficarum (#3.9)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: I'm Detective Bachman, this is Detective Turner.

Dean Winchester: I hate witches. They're always spewing their bodily fluids everywhere...
Sam Winchester: Pretty much.
Dean Winchester: It's creepy, y'know, it's downright unsanitary!

Sam Winchester: We have to start looking at the big picture, Dean. Start thinking in strategies, in moves ahead. It's not so simple, we're not just hunting anymore. We're at war.
Dean Winchester: Are you feeling okay?
Sam Winchester: Why are you always asking me that?
Dean Winchester: Because you're takin' advice from a demon, for starters. And by the way you seem less and less worried about offing people. You know, it used to eat you up inside.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, and what has that gotten me?
Dean Winchester: Nothing, but it's just what you're supposed to do, okay? We're supposed to drive in the friggin' car, and friggin' argue about this stuff. You know, you go on about the sanctity of life and all that crap...
Sam Winchester: Wait, so you're mad because I'm starting to agree with you?
Dean Winchester: No! I'm not mad, I'm - I'm worried. Sam, I'm worried 'cause you're not actin' like yourself.
Sam Winchester: You're right, I'm not. I don't have a choice.
Dean Winchester: What is that supposed to mean?
Sam Winchester: Look... Dean, you're leaving, right? And I gotta stay here in this crap hole of a world. Alone. So the way I see it, if I'm gonna make it, if I'm gonna fight this war when you're gone... then I gotta change.
Dean Winchester: Change into what?
Sam Winchester: Into you. I've gotta be more like you.

Sam Winchester: Wait, so you're mad I'm starting to agree with you?

"Supernatural: The British Invasion (#12.17)" (2017)
Sam Winchester: [to Dean] Hey, you talk to Mom lately?
Mick Davies: Oh, shouldn't worry about your mum. Her and Ketch make quite the team.
Dean Winchester: Would you want *your* mom working with him?
Mick Davies: Well, I can't say. I never really knew my mum. Or my dad. I was on the streets till the Men of Letters found me.
Sam Winchester: How did they find you?
Mick Davies: I picked a member's pocket. Not on purpose. I was just after a couple of quid. But I got a cursed coin from Ancient Babylon instead.

Sam Winchester: Smart.
Dean Winchester: Dude, don't compliment the bad guys.

Sam Winchester: You only have to do what you know is right. You only have to answer to your own code.

Castiel: This is my voicemail. Make your voice a mail.

"Supernatural: The Memory Remains (#12.18)" (2017)
Sam Winchester: [shoots Moloch] Colt. Dusts anything.

Dean Winchester: Next time you hear me say that our family is messed up, remind me that we could be psycho goat people.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, that's true enough.

Dean Winchester: What do you think our legacy's gonna be? When we're gone, after all the stuff that we've done, you think folks will remember us? You know, like, a hundred years from now?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: Oh, that's nice.
Sam Winchester: Well, I mean... guys like us, we're not exactly the type of people they write about in history books, you know? But the people we saved, they're our legacy. And they'll remember us and then I guess... we'll eventually fade away, too. That's fine, because we left the world better than we found it, you know.

Dean Winchester: Ketch? Where's Mick?
Arthur Ketch: Oh, he didn't tell you? He flew back to London last night. After all the... oh, unpleasantness with Dagon and Renny, well... Mick has a lot to answer for. So for the time being, you'll report to me.
Dean Winchester: Seriously?
Arthur Ketch: I don't like it any more than you do. I'd much rather be with your mother. Hunting. For... chupacabra in Texas. But for now, I'm what you've got. So... Wisconsin?
Dean Winchester: We fought a god and won.
Arthur Ketch: Well done. We'll be in touch.
[Ketch hangs up]
Dean Winchester: So now we're reporting to low rent Christian Bale? Seriously? I don't like that guy. He creeps me out.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.

"Supernatural: Time After Time (#7.12)" (2012)
Sam Winchester: I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I hope you're watching cartoon smut. Because reading Dick Roman crap over and over again is just... self-punishment.
Dean Winchester: It's called anime, and it's an art form.

Sam Winchester: Well, there's a semi-functional bathroom and one un-rancid bedroom.
Dean Winchester: Describe "semi-functional," and do not use the words "hole in the floor."

Sam Winchester: You going to look at more anime, or are you strictly into Dick now?

Dean Winchester: [Sam is showing Dean results on the laptop of research into past killings similar to their current hunt] Any pattern here other than location?
Sam Winchester: Random vics. Random years. But they seem to drop in threes.
Dean Winchester: That's two down, one to go. Alright, let me drive for a sec.
[turns the laptop towards himself]
Sam Winchester: You gonna... look at more anime? Or are you... strictly into Dick now?
[small smile]

"Supernatural: I'm No Angel (#9.3)" (2013)
Castiel: There really is a lot to being human, isn't there?
Dean Winchester: It ain't all just burritos and strippers, my friend.
Castiel: Yeah. I understand what you're saying.
Sam Winchester: You do?
Castiel: Yes, there's more to humanity than survival. You... look for purpose, and you must not be defeated by anger or despair. Or hedonism, for the matter.
Dean Winchester: Where does hedonism come into it?
Castiel: Well, my time with April was very educational.
Sam Winchester: Yeah. I mean, I would think that getting killed is something.
Castiel: And having sex.
Dean Winchester: [chokes] You had sex with April?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, that would be where the hedonism comes in.
Dean Winchester: Shh. So... Did you have protection?
Castiel: I had my angel blade.
Dean Winchester: Oh. Oh, he had the angel blade.

Dean Winchester: Uh, alright, well. He's definitely been here. Good news is he's gettin' cagy. He's using a fake name. Clarence.
Sam Winchester: That's what Meg used to call him. Course, he doesn't get that's the name of a pretty famous angel.
Dean Winchester: [puzzled look] What?
Sam Winchester: It's a Wonderful Life.
[Dean shakes his head]
Sam Winchester: Dude, seriously?

Sam Winchester: [looking at a piece of pie Dean just bought at a convenience store] Look at these chemicals. Do you even read the label?
Dean Winchester: [taking his pie] No. I read pie. The rest is just blah, blah, blah.

Man in Shelter: Hey, Clarence. How much longer you gonna be with us?
Castiel: [chewing toothpaste at a sink in the men's room] I'll be moving on tonight after work. It's time. Can I ask you something?
[walking towards a stall]
Man in Shelter: Sure.
Castiel: Do you ever tire of urinating? I'll never get used to it.
[goes into the stall]

"Supernatural: Torn and Frayed (#8.10)" (2013)
Castiel: I got what we need.
Dean Winchester: About time.
[He turns and sees that Sam is with Cas]
Dean Winchester: What's he doin' here?
Sam Winchester: Don't worry, Dean. Once we save Alfie, I'm out.
Dean Winchester: Oh, once *we* save Alfie. Don't hurt yourself, Sam. Cas and I can handle it.
Sam Winchester: Not according to Cas.
Dean Winchester: I told you we didn't need him.
Castiel: We need everything, Dean. And I need *both* of you, as you say, to stow your crap! Can you do that?

Dean Winchester: You know what, man, I got this. You go.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: Don't you have a girl to get back to?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I guess I do. Um. But, since when are you on the Amelia band wagon?
Dean Winchester: I don't know. I'm just tired of all the fighting. And, you know, maybe I'm a... little bit jealous. I could never separate myself from the job like you could. Hell, maybe it's time for at least one of us to be happy.

Castiel: I need your help. It seems this is going to involve... talking to people.
Dean Winchester: C'mon, Cas. I thought you were a hunter now.
[Goes to sit at the table where his laptop is]
Castiel: Yeah well. I thought so, too but- It seems I lack a certain...
Dean Winchester: Skill?
[Opens the laptop, sees it still has the Busty Asian Beauties website open, then quickly closes it with a snap]
Dean Winchester: You saw nothing.
[Cas starts to say something, stops, then looks away. Dean opens the laptop again, a little embarrassed, and tries to cover the website picture with one hand while closing the site with the other]
Dean Winchester: Alright.
Dean Winchester: What am I looking for?

Dean Winchester: [He and Cas have just entered a hospital room] Mr. Hinkley? Hi, uh, we're from the, uh, Geneva Gazette. I wanted to ask you a few questions about your... ambush.
[Chuckles with a small smile]
Chris Hinkley: Yeah, well, I'd laugh too if it didn't feel like the Sun just ate my face.
Castiel: [to Dean] That's a metaphor.
Dean Winchester: [Gives Cas a look. Then back to Hinkley] Sorry. Uh, now in the police report it said that the, uh, the bush, it talked to you. Yeah?
Chris Hinkley: Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, but yeah.
Castiel: What did it say?
Chris Hinkley: No clue. Sounded like... Klingon to me.
Dean Winchester: Gonna need exact words.
Chris Hinkley: Are you serious?
Castiel: [Looks at Dean] That's his serious face, yes.

"Supernatural: The Born-Again Identity (#7.17)" (2012)
Dean Winchester: How are you feeling?
Sam Winchester: Maybe you should cancel my U.F.C. fight.
Lucifer: Yeah. Keep that sense of humor, Sam. It'll get you through this.

Sam Winchester: Dean, we knew this was coming.
Dean Winchester: No. No.
Sam Winchester: When you put my soul back, Cass warned you about all the crap...
Dean Winchester: Screw Cass! Quit being Dalai frickin' Yoda about this, okay? Get pissed!
Sam Winchester: I'm too tired. This is what happens when you throw a soul into Lucifer's dog bowl. When you just think there's gonna be some cure up there?
Lucifer: Oh, you guys are having a moment.

Sam Winchester: [to Marin; Lucifer blows through the salt circle] You're gonna have to do this on your own. It's okay. I'm okay. I'm just having a little...
Lucifer: Brown acid moment.
Sam Winchester: ...dizzy thing. It'll pass.
Lucifer: Definitely. When your heart stops.

"Supernatural: Soul Survivor (#10.3)" (2014)
Castiel: You realize - one problem is solved, but one still remains. Dean is no longer a demon. That's true. But the Mark of Cain - that, he still has, and sooner or later, that's gonna be an issue.
Sam Winchester: You know what, Cass? I'm beat, man. One battle at a time, you know? So I'm just gonna grab my brother some cholesterol. And then I'm gonna get drunk.

Dean Winchester: Sammy. You know I hate shots.
Sam Winchester: I hate demons.

Castiel: Dean, you two have been through so much. Look, you're brothers. It'd take a lot more than trying to kill Sam with a hammer to make him want to walk away.
Dean Winchester: You realize how screwed up our lives are that that even makes sense.

"Supernatural: Sin City (#3.4)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: I might have found some omens in Ohio. Drought lightning, barometric pressure drop...
Dean Winchester: That's thrilling.
Sam Winchester: some guy blows his head off in a church, and another goes postal in a hobbey shop before the cops take him out. Might be demonic omens.
Dean Winchester: Or it could just be a suicide and a psycho scrapbooker.

Casey: What can I get you boys?
Dean Winchester: What's your specialty?
Casey: I make a mean hurricane.
Dean Winchester: [smirks] I guess we'll see about that.
Sam Winchester: [looks at Dean and chuckles] You drink hurricanes?
Dean Winchester: I do now.

Sam Winchester: Any idea where they went?
Bearded Bartender: Her place. For bible study.
Sam Winchester: Alright, do you have an address?
Bearded Bartender: What's wrong with you? You think I'm gonna give you a co-worker's address just so you can go over there and get your freaky peeping Tom rocks off...
[Sam silently hands him another $20]
Bearded Bartender: Corner of Piermont and Clinton. Have fun.

"Supernatural: Just My Imagination (#11.8)" (2015)
Sam Winchester: I was kind of a lonely kid, Dean.
Dean Winchester: You weren't lonely, you had me!

Sully: [to Reese] Will killing me make you feel better?
Sam Winchester: No Sully, this is not the answer.
Sully: This is what I do. Whatever's best for the kid. Reesie, if this is what you need... I'm okay with it.

Sam Winchester: [to Sully] Ever think... maybe you're a hero to me?

"Supernatural: Good God, Y'All (#5.2)" (2009)
Castiel: I don't have much time, we need to talk.
Dean Winchester: Okay.
Castiel: Your plan, to kill Lucifer.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, you wanna help?
Castiel: No. It's foolish. It can't be done.
Dean Winchester: Oh, well thanks for the support.
Castiel: But I believe I have the solution. There is someone besides Michael, strong enough to take on Lucifer. Strong enough to stop the Apocalypse.
Sam Winchester: Who's that?
Castiel: The one who resurrected me and put you on that airplane. The one who began everything. God.
[pause, the brothers look at him in disbelief]
Castiel: I'm gonna find God.

Sam Winchester: Who the hell are you? What are you?
Roger: Ya caught me. Popped in to watch. I can hustle like that.
Sam Winchester: So the Roger everyone around her knows? The real Roger?
Roger: Buried in a ditch.
Sam Winchester: So who are you?
Roger: Here's a hint. I was in Germany, then in Germany, then in the Middle East; I was in Darfur when my beeper went off. I'm waiting to hook up with my siblings - I've got three. We're going to have so much fun together.
Sam Winchester: I know who you are. There aren't any demons in town, are there?
Roger: Nope! Just frightened people ripping each others' throats out. I really haven't had to do too much. I mean, take out a bridge here; lay in a little hallucination there; sit back, pop some corn, watch the show. Frankly, you are really vicious little animals, Sam.
Sam Winchester: No. You're doing this.
Roger: Please. Last week, this was Mayberry. Now these people are stabbing each others' children.
Sam Winchester: 'Cause you made them see demons!
Roger: Honestly, people don't need a reason to kill each other. I mean, have you seen the Irish? They're all Irish! You think I'm a monster. I'm Jello shots at a party. I just remove inhibitions.
Sam Winchester: I'm gonna kill you myself.
Roger: Oh, that's adorable, considering you're my poster boy.
Sam Winchester: What's that supposed to mean?
Roger: You can't stop thinking about it. Ever since you saw it dripping off the blade of that knife.
Sam Winchester: You're wrong.
Roger: Save your protests for your brother. I can see inside your head, and man, it is one-track city in there: blood, blood, blood. Lust. For power. Same as always. You want to be strong again. But not just strong; stronger than everybody. Good intentions. Quick slide to hell, buddy-boy. You feel bad now? Wait 'till you're thigh-deep in warm corpses. 'Cause my friend, I'm just getting started. Showtime for the meatsuits.

Dean Winchester: God?
Castiel: Yes.
Dean Winchester: [disbelieving] God.
Castiel: Yes! He isn't in Heaven; he has to be somewhere.
Dean Winchester: Try New Mexico, I hear he's on a tortilla.
[a beat as the joke goes over Castiel's head]
Castiel: No, he's not on any flatbread.
Dean Winchester: Listen chuckles, even if there *is* a God, he is either dead, and that's the generous theory...
Castiel: He *is* out there, Dean.
Dean Winchester: ...or, he's up and kicking, and doesn't give a rat's ass about any of us. I mean look around you man, the world is in the toilet! We are *literally* at the End of Days here, and he's off somewhere, drinkin' booze out of a coconut! Alright?
Castiel: Enough! This is not a theological issue, it's strategic. With God's help, we *can* win.
Dean Winchester: It's a pipe dream, Cas.
Castiel: [advancing, furious] I killed two angels this week. Those are my brothers. I'm hunted, I rebelled, and I did it, all of it, for *you*, and you failed. You and your brother *destroyed* the *world*, and I lost everything... for nothing.
[pause, Dean and Sam look uncomfortable]
Castiel: So keep... your *opinions*... to yourself.

"Supernatural: The Song Remains the Same (#5.13)" (2010)
Dean Winchester: Well. This is it.
Sam Winchester: This is what?
Dean Winchester: Team Free Will. One ex blood junkie, one dropout with six bucks to his name and Mr. Comatose over there. Awesome.
Sam Winchester: It's not funny.
Dean Winchester: I'm not laughin'.

Sam Winchester: Not much more we can do tonight. Alright, I'm just gonna go through some files. You can go ahead and get going.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: Go ahead. Unleash the Kracken. See you tomorrow morning.
Dean Winchester: [Confused] Where am I going?
Sam Winchester: Dean. It's Valentine's Day. Your favorite holiday, remember? I mean, what do you always call it? Unattached Drifter Christmas?

Dean Winchester: So what, you're like a DeLorean without enough plutonium?
Castiel: [frustrated] I don't understand that reference.

"Supernatural: Captives (#9.14)" (2014)
Sam Winchester: So.
Dean Winchester: Yep. Bunker's haunted.

Sam Winchester: You feel that? I think I felt a chill.
Dean Winchester: Yeah. It's cuz it's cold.
[holding his cell, leaving a voicemail]
Dean Winchester: Crowley. It's Dean. Call me when you get this.
Sam Winchester: Really, Dean?
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: That's your third unanswered voicemail. You ever think... maybe he's just not that into you?
Dean Winchester: Well, his is our last confirmed link to Miss Tran. Yes, he is a flaming douche. But, at least we know he's real which is more than we can say for this Candy no show.

Kevin Tran: Hey, before I go, would you guys promise me something?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: Anything.
Kevin Tran: Can you two... get over it? Dudes. Just cuz you couldn't see me doesn't mean I couldn't see you. The drama? The fighting? It's stupid. My Mom's taking home a ghost. You two... you're both still here.
Sam Winchester: Of course. Promise.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Kevin Tran: Good.
[He leaves]
Dean Winchester: Well, that was-
[turns to see Sam leaving the room]
Dean Winchester: Yeah, okay.

"Supernatural: Mommy Dearest (#6.19)" (2011)
Sam Winchester: Well, you know what? Maybe it's like iron or silver, you know? Hurts them, not us.
Dean Winchester: Maybe, but a fat lot of good it does us till we find that bitch.
Bobby Singer: I'm looking, but I'm thinking maybe it's time you made a call.
Dean Winchester: Why's it always gotta to be me, huh? It's not like Cass lives in my ass. The dude's busy.
[Castiel appears behind him]
Dean Winchester: Cass, get out of my ass.
Castiel: I was never in your...

Dean Winchester: What do you call these?
Bobby Singer: Well, congrats. You discovered it. You get to name it.
Dean Winchester: Jefferson Starships. Huh? Because they're horrible and hard to kill.
Sam Winchester: Looks like the whole bar has turned into...
Dean Winchester: Jefferson Starships.
Sam Winchester: Fine.

Castiel: I'll search the town. Give me a moment.
[Cass doesn't disappear]
Dean Winchester: Cass, we can still see you.
Castiel: Yeah, I'm still here.
Dean Winchester: Okay, well, you don't have to wait on us. You - Well, now it just looks like you're pooping.

"Supernatural: Wendigo (#1.2)" (2005)
Sam Winchester: Why are we still even here?
Dean Winchester: [pulls out John's journal] This is why. This book. This is Dad's single most valuable possession. Everything he knows about every evil thing is in here. And he's passed it on to us. I think he wants us to pick up where he left off. You know, saving people, hunting things. The family business.

[Dean has been taken by the Wendigo; Sam finds a trail of peanut M&M's on the ground]
Sam Winchester: [laughs] It's better than bread crumbs.

Sam Winchester: So, we've got half a chance in the daylight, and I, for one, wanna kill this evil son of a bitch.
Dean Winchester: Well, hell you know I'm in!

"Supernatural: And Then There Were None (#6.16)" (2011)
Dean Winchester: [Big smile] Well, look what the cat dragged in.
[He and Sam are seeing Rufus for the first time in a long time]
Sam Winchester: It really is good to see you, Rufus.
Rufus Turner: [shaking hands with Sam and Dean] I can believe it. It must get old dealing with this miserable cuss here all by yourselves.
Sam Winchester: Ha! Is it that obvious?
Bobby Singer: Why don't you three get a room?

Dean Winchester: [Watching Bobby as he comes to tied to a chair, possessed by the worm] Well, hey there, you little herpe.
[Places the live wire against Bobby's neck then steps back]
Sam Winchester: Why do you keep talkin' about herpes?
Dean Winchester: What?
[Sam just looks at him]
Dean Winchester: I don't- shut up. Shut up!

Bobby Singer: It was Omaha. It was my fault. And he never let it go.
Dean Winchester: [without hesitation] Well, he should have.
Bobby Singer: You don't know what I did, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Doesn't matter.
Bobby Singer: What do you mean, it doesn't...
Dean Winchester: I mean, at the end of the day, you two were family. Life's short. And ours are shorter than most. What, are we gonna spend it wringing our hands? Something's gonna get us. Eventually. And when my guts get ripped out, just so you two know, we're good. Blanket apology for the crap that anybody's done, all the way around.
Sam Winchester: Some of us pulled a lot of crap, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Well. Clean slate.
Sam Winchester: Okay.

"Supernatural: I Believe the Children Are Our Future (#5.6)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: [Dean is eating... again] Dude, seriously... with the ham.
Dean Winchester: [Speaks with mouth full] We don't have a fridge.

Dean Winchester: Our motel isn't in that circle, by any chance?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, why?
[Dean shows Sam his hairy palm]
Sam Winchester: uh, dude, fu... that's not what I think it is, is it?
Dean Winchester: I got bored, that nurse was hot.
Sam Winchester: You know, you can go blind from that too.
Dean Winchester: Give me five minutes, we'll go check out that house.
[walks away]
Sam Winchester: Hey! Do not use my razor!
[Dean smirks]

Castiel: [unknowingly sits on a whoopie cushion] That wasn't me.
Dean Winchester: Who put that there?

"Supernatural: The Things We Left Behind (#10.9)" (2014)
Castiel: Do you think Claire is in trouble?
Dean Winchester: She's hanging out with a guy named Randy. She's in trouble.

Sandra Phelan: What is it that you do exactly?
Castiel: I... um... I fight certain deadly threats to humanity.
[awkward silence]
Claire Novak: He's an exterminator.
Castiel: I'm an exterminator.

Dean Winchester: Cass, I need you to promise me something.
Castiel: Of course.
Dean Winchester: If I do go dark side, you gotta take me out.
Castiel: What do you mean?
Dean Winchester: Knife me. Smite me. Throw me into the freaking sun, whatever. And don't let Sam get in the way, because he'll try. I can't go down that road again man. I can't be that thing again.

"Supernatural: Family Matters (#6.7)" (2010)
Sam Winchester: Samuel didn't take the bait. So I went with Plan B.
Dean Winchester: We had a Plan B?

Sam Winchester: Working with a demon, huh? You're not who I thought you were.
Samuel Campbell: You don't know anything about me, son.
Dean Winchester: So what's so important that you're the king of Hell's cabana boy, huh? What'd he offer you? Girls, money? Hair?

Samuel Campbell: This Castiel?
Castiel: [nods]
Samuel Campbell: You're scrawnier than I pictured.
Castiel: This is a vessel. My true form is the size of your Chrysler Building.

"Supernatural: Phantom Traveler (#1.4)" (2005)
Dean Winchester: [in a new tux] Man. I look like one of the Blues Brothers!
Sam Winchester: No, you don't. You look more like a seventh grader at his first dance.

Sam Winchester: Just try to relax.
Dean Winchester: Just try to shut up!

Sam Winchester: [in their seats on a plane. Dean is afraid of flying] You're humming Metallica?
Dean Winchester: It calms me down.

"Supernatural: All Hell Breaks Loose: Part 2 (#2.22)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: You saved my life over and over. Man you sacrifice everything for me, don't you think I'd do the same for you? You're my big brother, there's nothing I wouldn't do for you. And I don't care, I'm going to get you out of this. I'm going to save your ass for a change.

Sam Winchester: How long did you get?
Dean Winchester: One year. I got one year.

Sam Winchester: We got work to do.
Sam Winchester: [slams the trunk lid closed]

"Supernatural: Jus in Bello (#3.12)" (2008)
FBI Agent Henricksen: I, uh... I shot the sheriff.
Dean Winchester: But you didn't shoot the deputy.
FBI Agent Henricksen: Five minutes ago I was fine, and then...
Dean Winchester: Let me guess. Some nasty black smoke jammed itself down your throat?
Sam Winchester: You were possessed.
FBI Agent Henricksen: Possessed, like... possessed?
Sam Winchester: That's what it feels like. Now you know.
Dean Winchester: I owe you the biggest I-told-you-so ever.

Sam Winchester: However many there are, they could be possessing anyone, anyone could just walk right in.
Dean Winchester: It's kind of wild, right? I mean's like they're coming right for us. Never done that before.
Sam Winchester: ...
Dean Winchester: 'S like we got a contract on us.
Dean Winchester: Think it's because we're so awesome? I think it's 'cause we're so awesome.

FBI Agent Henricksen: I better call in. Hell of a story I won't be telling.
Sam Winchester: So what are you gonna tell 'em?
FBI Agent Henricksen: The least ridiculous lie I can come up with in the next five minutes.
Dean Winchester: Good luck with that. Not to pressure you or anything, but... what are you planning to do about us?
FBI Agent Henricksen: I'm gonna kill you.
[he smiles]
FBI Agent Henricksen: Sam and Dean Winchester were in the chopper when it caught on fire. Nothing's left. Can't even identify 'em with dental records. Rest in peace, guys.

"Supernatural: Metamorphosis (#4.4)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: [after Dean confronts Sam about using his powers] You were gone. I was here. I had to keep on fighting without you. And what I'm doing, it works.
Dean Winchester: Tell me, if it's so terrific, then why'd you lie about it to me? Why did an angel tell me to stop you?
Sam Winchester: [Sam looks up, startled at Dean] What?
Dean Winchester: Cas said if I don't stop you, he will. See what that means, Sam? That means that *God* doesn't want you doing this. So, are you just gonna stand there and tell me that everything is all good?

Sam Winchester: [to Jack] You've got this dark pit inside of you, I know, believe me. I know. But that doesn't mean you have to fall into it. You don't have to be a monster... It doesn't matter what you are, it only matters what you do. It's your choice.

Sam Winchester: [struggling to get out of the closet] Dean?
Jack Montgomery: Dean can't come to the phone right now.
Sam Winchester: Jack! I swear to God!

"Supernatural: Salvation (#1.21)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: It seems that as closer as we get to the demon, the stronger my vision get.
John Winchester: Ok, why didn't I hear about this? If something like this starts happening to your brother, you pick up the phone and you call me.
Dean Winchester: [surprised] Call you? Are you kidding me? Dad, I called you from Lawrence, Sam called you when I was dying. To be getting you on the phone, I have a better chance at winning the lottery!

Sam Winchester: It's still in there!
Dean Winchester: Sam - Sam! No!
Sam Winchester: Dean, let me go it's still in there!
Dean Winchester: It's burning to the ground! It's suicide!
Sam Winchester: I don't care!
Dean Winchester: I DO!

Sam Winchester: That thing killed Jess. That thing killed Mom.
Dean Winchester: You said yourself once... that no matter what we do, they're gone. And they're never comin' back.
Sam Winchester: [grabs Dean and shoves him up against the wall] Don't you say that! Not you! Not after all this. Don't you say that.
Dean Winchester: Sam, look... the three of us... that's all we have... it's all I have... sometimes I feel like I'm barely holding it together, man... without you and Dad...

"Supernatural: Somewhere Between Heaven and Hell (#12.15)" (2017)
Crowley: Well, there you go. The bitch tends to hold a grudge. So we either kill Ramsey, or the hound eats her.
Sam Winchester: Wait a second. "We"?
Crowley: Pup like that out and about isn't good for business. Makes it look like I'm not in control. But that mutt's head mounted on my wall? Good for the brand. So yes, Moose, for now. "We".
Dean Winchester: Great. So we got a hellhound who's gunning for revenge, and it's personal. Ah. Just when I thought this gig couldn't get any weirder...
Crowley: [chuckles] Oh. It can always get weirder.

Dean Winchester: Take care of her.
Sam Winchester: Of course. Dean, look, even if Ramsey circles back, as long as we keep moving, Gwen's gonna be just... You're talking about the car.
Dean Winchester: You tend to ride the brakes.
Sam Winchester: Dean, I know how to drive.
Dean Winchester: I'm just saying. Okay, just imagine she's a... a beautiful woman. A beautiful, beautiful woman.
Sam Winchester: Oh, come on. I'm done.
Dean Winchester: Sam...
Crowley: Ew.

Lucifer: Sorry, kid. You understand, right? No - no witnesses or anything, yeah?
Thomas: Yes. Take me, oh, Fallen One! My life is yours to devour.
Lucifer: See, now you just made it weird.
[dusts Thomas with a snap of his fingers]

"Supernatural: Alex Annie Alexis Ann (#9.19)" (2014)
Dean Winchester: I don't know, Sammy. Looks like Jody might not need our help anymore.
Sam Winchester: Oh, they grow up so fast. Don't they?
Sheriff Jody Mills: Yeah, joke all you want.

Sheriff Jody Mills: Well, shouldn't raise too many eyebrows, me being gone for a day.
Sam Winchester: Maybe, but you, uh, sure don't want backup?
Sheriff Jody Mills: You want me to enlist my men in a protection detail against vampires? Frank's still in the dark about what hit him last night. The guy still has nightmares about the barn episode of "Walking Dead."

Sam Winchester: Nice work back there.
Sam Winchester: Look at me, bitch?
Dean Winchester: Hey, you got another snappy one liner, I'm all ears.
Sam Winchester: What I'm saying is... It looked to me like you were enjoying it... maybe... too much.
Dean Winchester: And?
[Sam gives him a disbelieving look]
Dean Winchester: Well, sorry for not putting on a Hair shirt.
[Sam looks away in disbelief]
Dean Winchester: Killing things that need killing, it's kind of our job. Last I checked, taking pleasure in that's not a crime.

"Supernatural: My Heart Will Go On (#6.17)" (2011)
Sam Winchester: So you just, what, unsunk a giant boat?
Balthazar: Oh, come on, I saved people. I thought you loved that kind of thing.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, but now those people and their kids and their kids' kids... They must have interacted with so many other people changed so much crap. You totally Butterfly Effect-ed history.
Dean Winchester: Dude, dude. Rule one: No Kutcher references.
Balthazar: Yes, unfortunately, there's still an Ashton Kutcher. And you still averted an apocalypse and there are still archangels.

Sam Winchester: I just had the weirdest dream.
Dean Winchester: Twenty bucks says mine was weirder. I'm not kidding.
Sam Winchester: No, no. I'm not kidding either. I mean, it was just bizarre.
Dean Winchester: Mine had the actual Titanic in it.
[Sam gives him a stare]
Dean Winchester: What? There something on my face?
Sam Winchester: Did it, uh, not sink? Because Balthazar...
Dean Winchester: Had a hate-on for Billy Zane? Why are you having my dreams, dude?

Dean Winchester: Why did you unsink the ship?
Balthazar: Oh, because, I *hated* the movie.
Dean Winchester: What movie?
Balthazar: Exactly!
Sam Winchester: Wait, so you saved a cruise-liner because...?
Balthazar: Because, that god-awful Celine Dion song made me want to smite myself!

"Supernatural: Blade Runners (#9.16)" (2014)
Sam Winchester: So, the First Blade was never on display.
Dr. McElroy: No authenticated item by that name was ever on these premises.
Dean Winchester: Authenticated. Dr. McElroy, this blade was stolen and smuggled into the US in violation of treaties with several governments. We can compel you to speak.
[Gives her a confident smile]
Dr. McElroy: [with a very direct, flirtatious smile at Dean] Compel.
Dr. McElroy: And what might that involve?
[Dean's confident smile drops and he looks a little surprised at her straightforward come on. She smiles confidently right back at him]
Dr. McElroy: Alright, look. I did acquire the so-called First Blade. And carbon dating did peg it to biblical times, but the authentication proved unreliable.
Sam Winchester: So, it was in the vault.
Dr. McElroy: I removed it myself. The guards didn't know.
Sam Winchester: And where is it now?
Dr. McElroy: Several weeks ago a confidential offer was made to purchase it. I was afraid we would never authenticate the thing, so...
Dean Winchester: Who was the buyer?
Dr. McElroy: [Smiling at Dean] Sorry. The buyer insisted on absolute secrecy.
Dean Winchester: Well... Federal statutes trump your little deal. So... the buyer?
Dr. McElroy: And you'll get it out of me one way or the other, won't you, Agent?
[She gives Dean another very suggestive smile until his smile turns to uncertainty]
Dr. McElroy: I never did know his real identity. He called himself Magnus. Don't ask me where he lives; I have no idea. But, I do have a meeting, so
[pulling out a business card to hand it to Dean]
Dr. McElroy: here is my number should you need anything else.
[Sam reaches for the card, but she pulls it out of his reach and extends it to Dean. He takes the card then watches her walk away. Sam gives Dean a look]
Dean Winchester: What?

Cuthbert Sinclair: [to Sam, tied to another another pillar after trying to rescue Dean with Crowley, who is hiding. Magnus takes a knife from his collection] Ya know, I discarded you far too quickly, Sam. You're way more valuable than I thought you were.
[to Dean, still chained to a pillar]
Cuthbert Sinclair: Why would I knock myself out trying to sap your will,
[moving towards Sam with the knife]
Cuthbert Sinclair: when I think Sam here will get you to see things my way.
Dean Winchester: [threateningly] Magnus, I swear to God!
Cuthbert Sinclair: [to Dean] What? What're you gonna do?
[to Sam]
Cuthbert Sinclair: What is he gonna do? Huh?
[Magnus cuts Sam's cheek. Sam grimaces in pain and Dean struggles against his chains. Magnus moves even closer to Sam and speaks softly, almost gently]
Cuthbert Sinclair: Look, look, Sam. I'm not gonna kill ya, course not.
[Dean notices Crowley sneak into the room out of sight of Magnus]
Cuthbert Sinclair: But, I am gonna make you suffer unimaginably.
[He cuts Sam's neck. He watches Sam's reaction, but turns as he hears Dean's chains dropping to the floor. Angry now, Magnus swings his arm back to stab Sam. Dean grabs his arm then cuts his head off with the First Blade. Crowley walks up to see Dean's reaction to using the blade. Dean is becoming overwhelmed again, more this time after having used it. He looks at Crowley, then stares at the blade in his hand as his arm shakes and the mark glows brightly]
Sam Winchester: Dean.
[Dean doesn't hear him, stares at the blade in his shaking right hand]
Sam Winchester: Dean.
[Sam looks from Dean's face to the blade and back, worried for his brother as Dean raises the blade to eye level and just stares at it]
Sam Winchester: Hey. It's over. He's dead.
[Dean still doesn't hear Sam. His gaze becomes more intent]
Sam Winchester: Drop the blade, Dean.
[Sam's words come to him from a distance. Crowley watches as Dean focuses more intently on the blade and his face becomes almost feral]
Sam Winchester: Dean!
[Finally, Dean hears Sam, but looks at him as if surprised he's there, still distracted by the power of his connection to the blade]
Sam Winchester: Drop the blade.
[Sam's eyes are pleading, worried as Dean's eyes and face clear, finally realizing where he is and trying to shake off the overwhelming feelings. Dean finally drops the blade, his hand shaking as he lowers it to his side. He looks down at it then up at Sam, shocked and mortified]

Dean Winchester: [Sees that the Impala has been broken into] No. No! C'mon!
[Sam and Dean rush forward to check the damage]
Dean Winchester: What the Hell?
Sam Winchester: Sulfur. Demons.
[Dean checks the interior while Sam checks the trunk]
Dean Winchester: Ah! Abaddon's. Well, she's just one jump behind us. Guess she couldn't find Magnus' joint either. What about the trunk?
Sam Winchester: Safe. Warding kept 'em out.
Dean Winchester: [muttering] Demon mitts all over my baby.
[Closes the back door and notices the scratches along the side]
Dean Winchester: Oh, c'mon!
[Slams the front door shut to find more scratches]
Dean Winchester: What, now they're keying cars?
[He goes down on his knees to check the damage, licks his thumb and rubs it along a scratch]
Sam Winchester: What language is that?
Crowley: It's Enokian. The message isn't for you. It's for me.
[Points to the scratches while Dean briefly puts his forehead against the door dejectedly then continues to check the damage]
Crowley: 'Be afraid. Your queen.' Abaddon's getting more brazen. She thinks I'm losing my grip.
Sam Winchester: Dean.
[Looks down at Dean who places his head and hands against the door in a sad hug]
Sam Winchester: Dean!
[Dean stands up, exasperated]
Sam Winchester: Listen. You said Crowley was only useful til we got the blade.
[pauses while he raises his eyebrows significantly]
Sam Winchester: We got the blade.
[Both brothers turn to face Crowley, who immediately waves his hand and slams and pins them both against the side of the car. Sam drops the blade]
Dean Winchester: Uh! Ahhh!
[in complete frustration]
Crowley: You know, boys. I'm in debt to you. You forced sobriety on me, and now I can see the situation for what it is. Dean, you are quite the killing machine and it occurs to me that Abaddon is not the only name on your list. My name must be up there as well.
[With the flick of a finger, he pulls the blade from the ground into his hand]
Dean Winchester: It's no good to you without me.
Crowley: Yes, but as long as I have it, it's no good to you. Now this is the way it's going to go. I'll hang on to ol' donkey teeth here until such time as you locate Abaddon. Then, you'll destroy her.
[to Sam]
Crowley: You're right, Moose. You can't trust me. But, sadly, I can't trust you either.

"Supernatural: We Need to Talk About Kevin (#8.1)" (2012)
Dean Winchester: Well... Let's do this.
Sam Winchester: I don't know whether to give you a hug or take a shower.

Sam Winchester: What about you?
Dean Winchester: What about me?
Sam Winchester: Look at you. You've still got that look. You're shaky. You're on edge.
Sam Winchester: What was it like?
Dean Winchester: You wouldn't believe me if I told you.
Sam Winchester: Try me.
Dean Winchester: [distant look in his eye] It was bloody. Messy. Thirty-one flavors of bottom dwelling nasties. Hell, most days it felt like 360 degree combat. But, there was somethin' about bein' there.
Dean Winchester: It felt pure.

Dean Winchester: [a hamburger and fries have just been delivered to their table] Sweet mother of God.
[Sam pushes the plate over to Dean]
Dean Winchester: For me? Seriously?
[Sam just gives him a look and Dean just smiles and picks up the hamburger]
Sam Winchester: Check this out.
[looking at his laptop]
Sam Winchester: So, I went through campus security archives around the time Kevin should've been here. Anyone look familiar?
[He turns the laptop towards Dean]
Dean Winchester: [eyes closed, chewing] Mm, mmm, mmm.
Sam Winchester: Dude. It's a burger.
Dean Winchester: [emphatically] It's treasure.

"Supernatural: Dead in the Water (#1.3)" (2005)
Sam Winchester: People don't just disappear, Dean. Other people just stop looking for them.

Sam Winchester: You know, um... what you said about Mom. You never told me that before.

Sam Winchester: I think it's safe to say we can rule out Nessie!

"Supernatural: Hell's Angel (#11.18)" (2016)
Dean Winchester: Hold on, okay? Let's just put it in reverse. We will put Lucifer back in the Cage *after* we put Amara back on ice. It has to happen in that order, otherwise there is no Lucifer, there's no Cage, there's no nothing.
Crowley: He's spent years marinating in hate against us! He has to go.
Sam Winchester: Problem is, we may need him.
Dean Winchester: He's been down this road with Amara before. He might be the only one powerful enough to use the Horn against her.
Crowley: He had me cleaning the floors with my tongue! He called me "puppy"! He made me beg.
Dean Winchester: All right. Come on. Is this what this about? Huh? Your stupid ego? The fact that he dissed you in front of a bunch of stupid demons? You're smarter than this. Come on!
Sam Winchester: Dean's right. Priority is to put the Horn in Lucifer's hands and set him loose on Amara.
Dean Winchester: After we exorcise Lucifer out of Cass and put him in a new vessel.
Sam Winchester: What? Really?
Dean Winchester: Yes, really. We're not gonna send Lucifer into battle inside Cass. What if he doesn't make it?
Sam Winchester: Dean, it's a strong vessel. It's held Cass for years, and we know what he's been through. I'm guessing it can hold Lucifer.
Dean Winchester: "It"? It's not an "it," Sam. It's Cass.
Sam Winchester: And Cass wanted to do this.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, well, there's times I want to get slapped during sex by a girl wearing a Zorro mask. That don't make it a good idea.
Sam Winchester: Dean, this is exactly how we screw ourselves. W-we make the - the heart choice and instead of the smart choice.
Dean Winchester: Oh, okay. Thank you, Dr. Phil. Cass is family.
Sam Winchester: Yes, and his choice deserves to be respected.
Dean Winchester: Even if it kills him.
Crowley: It's killing me. I would rather stick white-hot skewers in my eyes than listen to you two bitches bicker! I gave you the terms of my deal. If Lucifer's not back in the Cage, the Horn stays hidden.

Sam Winchester: Okay. S-so now we all just saw what happens when she's in a bad mood, which, apparently, she's been in since the dawn of time.
Dean Winchester: I think she just rattled heaven with a flick of her pinkie finger. That's not a big enough dose of reality for you?

Angel 2: God cast you out of Heaven.
Lucifer: And who do you think spread that tabloid headline? It was Captain G, the Eternal One. And why? Because I didn't buy in to his obsessive, compulsive love for mankind.
Angel 1: Mankind is His creation.
Lucifer: Oh, come on! It's not like he invented the Prius, which actually works. I don't have to tell you people what a mess mankind is: the Salem Witch Trials, Third Reich, Twin Towers. Sure, every once in a while, he'll send down a plague to straighten them out, but it's nothing permanent. Humanity brought us Hiroshima and got a re-do. I merely questioned his priorities, and I got the boot.
Angel 2: He said you're evil.
Angel 1: Incarnate. E-Evil incarnate.
Lucifer: It's marketing. He's creating a need in the consumer's mind. Can't be a Super Savior if you don't have a Super Villain.

"Supernatural: Black (#10.1)" (2014)
Sam Winchester: What the hell is that?
Cole Trenton: Well, that's a kill switch. This here is the remote.
[punches out Sam and cuffs him]
Cole Trenton: Guessing you're a righty.

Crowley: [Answering a call he believes to be from one of his demons] You're dead.
Sam Winchester: Nope. Just using a dead man's phone.
Crowley: Moose. Took you long enough. Your brother and I were beginning to wonder if you'd hit another dog. You know.

Dean Winchester: [Dean picks up his phone and it says "Sam" on the caller-ID] I left you an open tab at the bar. Knock yourself out.
Cole Trenton: Hell I might just take you up on that.
Dean Winchester: And who's this?
Cole Trenton: Me? Well I'm karma, brother.
Dean Winchester: On my brother's phone?
Cole Trenton: On your brother's phone.
Dean Winchester: [Cold tone] Is he dead?
Cole Trenton: No, not yet. As long as you show up where I tell you to show up, your brother will be just fine.
Dean Winchester: And how do I know he's still alive?
Cole Trenton: [Points the phone towards Sam to let him speak] Speak.
Sam Winchester: [Sam stays quiet]
Cole Trenton: [Cole punches him in the face]
Cole Trenton: Proof of life.
Sam Winchester: [Yells] Dean!
Cole Trenton: Got a pen?
Dean Winchester: No you listen to me. There's no trade, there's no meetup, there's no nothing. Except the 100% guarantee, somewhere down the road, I will find you, and I will kill you.
Cole Trenton: Well that'll be a cold comfort to your dead brother.
Dean Winchester: I told him to let me go. So whatever jam he's in now, that is his problem.
Cole Trenton: Yeah well I'll be sure to pass that on to him as I'm slitting his throat.
Dean Winchester: Yeah you do that, 'cause he knows me. And he knows damn sure that if I am one thing, I am a man of my word.
[Dean hangs up the phone and Cole is left standing in the barn]

"Supernatural: Hibbing 911 (#10.8)" (2014)
Dean Winchester: This badge means something.
Sam Winchester: I made it at Kinkos.
Dean Winchester: Yes you did. Be proud of that.

Dean Winchester: [on speaker phone] Hey, Jody. How's Alex holding up?
Sheriff Jody Mills: Awesome, already head of the cheerleading squad.
Sam Winchester: Wow. Really?
Sheriff Jody Mills: No, Sam, she smokes grass under the bleachers. But at least she's not luring men to their deaths.
Sam Winchester: Right.

Sam Winchester: [on phone] All right, well, uh... enjoy the retreat.
Sheriff Jody Mills: Screw you, Winchester.

"Supernatural: Sympathy for the Devil (#5.1)" (2009)
[Zachariah has been threatening and tormenting Dean; Castiel appears and kills the other angels with a silver stiletto]
Zachariah: How are you...?
Castiel: Alive? It's a good question.
[indicating Dean and Sam]
Castiel: How did these two end up on that airplane? Another good question, because the angels didn't do it. I think we both know the answer, don't we?
Zachariah: No... It's not possible.
Castiel: [fiercely] It scares you. Well, it should. Now, put these boys back together, and go. I won't ask twice.
[Zachariah disappears; the brothers recover]
Castiel: You two need to be more careful.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, starting to get that. Your frat brothers are bigger dicks than I thought.
Castiel: I don't mean the angels. Lucifer is circling his vessel, and once he takes it those hex bags won't be enough to protect you.
[he touches their chests, the brothers flinch and groan]
Dean Winchester: What the hell was that?
Castiel: An Enochian sigil. It'll hide you from every angel in creation. Including Lucifer.
Dean Winchester: What, did you just brand us with it?
Castiel: No, I carved it into your ribs.
[pause while they take this in]
Sam Winchester: Hey Cas, were you really dead?
[a beat]
Castiel: Yes.
Dean Winchester: Then how are you back?
[Castiel looks at them for a moment, not answering, then vanishes with a sound of wingbeats]

Sam Winchester: [Stumbles back] Geez! Ow!
Chuck Shurley: Sam?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Dean Winchester: Hey Chuck.
Chuck Shurley: So... you're okay?
Sam Winchester: Well, my head hurts.
Chuck Shurley: No, I mean, I mean, my last vision... you went, like, full-on vadar. Your body temperature was 150. Your heart rate was 200. Your eyes were black.
Dean Winchester: Your eyes were black?
Sam Winchester: I didn't know.
Dean Winchester: Where's Cass?
Chuck Shurley: He's dead. Or gone. The archangel smoked the crap out of him. I'm sorry.
Dean Winchester: You're sure? I mean, maybe he just vanished into the light or something.
Chuck Shurley: Oh, no. He, like, exploded. Like a water balloon of chunky soup.
Sam Winchester: You got a...

[Nick is visited in a dream by his murdered wife]
Lucifer: You're dreaming, Nick. But it doesn't mean this isn't real.
Nick: Sarah?
Lucifer: I'm not your wife, Nick. I'm an angel.
Nick: An angel?
Lucifer: My name is Lucifer.
Nick: Sure. Naturally. Um... Could you do me a favor there, Satan, and remind me to quit drinking before I go to bed?
Lucifer: I'm here because you're special, Nick. There's very, very few people like you.
Nick: Is that so?
Lucifer: You're a vessel... a very powerful vessel.
Nick: Meaning what, exactly?
Lucifer: I need to take control of your mind and your body. To be honest, it'll probably be unpleasant for you. But it is necessary.
Nick: Okay, look... if it's just the same to you, I think I'd like to wake up now.
Lucifer: I told you, this is real. Don't be afraid. This is your choice. You need to invite me in.
Nick: Even if this is real, which it's not, but assuming it was... why the hell would I do something like that?
Lucifer: You people misunderstand me. You call me "Satan" and "devil", but do you know my crime? I loved God too much. And for that, He betrayed me. Punished me. Just as He's punished you. After all, how could God stand idly by while that man broke into your home and butchered your family in their beds? There are only two rational answers, Nick: either He's sadistic or He simply doesn't care. You're angry. You have every right to be angry. I am angry, too. That's why I want to find Him, hold Him accountable for His actions. Just because He created us doesn't mean He can toy with us, like playthings.
Nick: If I help you... can you bring back my family?
Lucifer: I'm sorry. I can't. But I can give you the next best thing. God did this to you, Nick. And I can give you justice. Peace.
Nick: How do I know you're telling the truth?
Lucifer: Because, contrary to popular belief, I don't lie. I don't need to. What I need... is you. Nick, I need you to say yes.
Nick: Then yes.
[Lucifer possesses Nick in a flash of heavenly light]

"Supernatural: The Bad Seed (#11.3)" (2015)
Rowena: There's no trust. Are we not a team?
Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester: No!

Dean Winchester: You know where you are? What's the date?
Castiel: Earth. Several billion years from the beginning.

Castiel: It was like I was... inside a blender. That was set to purée for a tomato salsa.
Dean Winchester: And you're the tomato?
Castiel: In this analogy, yes.

"Supernatural: Heart (#2.17)" (2007)
[Sam is sitting at the kitchen table at Madison's apartment.]
Madison: Do you wanna sit on the couch?
Sam Winchester: No. No, no, I'm okay.
Madison: It's more comfortable.
Sam Winchester: I'm fine.
[Madison empties a laundry basket onto the table and begins folding a pair of lacy underwear]
Sam Winchester: You know what? I think I will sit on that couch.

[discussing the plot of a soap opera]
Sam Winchester: Wait, so Kendall married Ethan's father just to get back at him?
Madison: Yup. And now she's set to inherit all the casinos that were supposed to go to Ethan.
Sam Winchester: What a bitch!

Dean Winchester: I hate to say it, she's a sweet girl, but part of her is...
Sam Winchester: Evil?
Dean Winchester: Yeah...
Sam Winchester: That's what they say about me, Dean. So me you won't kill, but her your going to just blow away?

"Supernatural: Croatoan (#2.9)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: Dean, did you pay attention to History class at all?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, shot hear round the world, how a bill becomes a law...
Sam Winchester: That's not school. That's School House Rock.
Dean Winchester: [shrugs] Whatever.

Dean Winchester: [Sam points to a word carved into a telephone pole] Croatoan?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
[Dean stares blankly]
Sam Winchester: Roanoke... lost colony... ring a bell? Dean, did you pay any attention in history class?
Dean Winchester: Yeah. Shot heard 'round the world, how bills become laws...
Sam Winchester: That's not school; that's schoolhouse rock!

Dean Winchester: That was creepy right, a little too Stepford.
Sam Winchester: Big time.

"Supernatural: The Magnificent Seven (#3.1)" (2007)
Dean Winchester: Truth is, I'm tired, Sam. And, I don't know, it's like there's a light at the end of the tunnel.
Sam Winchester: It's Hellfire, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, well, whatever. You're alive, I feel good for the first time in a long time. I got a year to live, Sam. I'd like to make the most of it, so what do you say we kill some evil sons of bitches and we raise a little Hell, huh?
Sam Winchester: You're unbelievable.
Dean Winchester: Very true.

Sam Winchester: How could you make that deal?
Dean Winchester: Because I couldn't live with you dead.

"Supernatural: Mamma Mia (#12.2)" (2016)
Mick Davies: I reckon you could finish me off without breaking a sweat. Am I right?
Castiel: I don't sweat under any circumstances.

Lucifer: Get off my furniture, squatter.
Crowley: Lucifer. Wearing Vince Vincente, second-tier star. I would've thought Beiber was your style.

"Supernatural: Inside Man (#10.17)" (2015)
Castiel: We have your grace, Metatron. You're mortal now. So you will answer our questions, or Sam will, um... what's the phrase? Blow your fricking brains out. It's called leverage, Metatron.
Sam Winchester: Learn it, live it, love it.

Metatron: Well, howdy, fellas.
Bobby Singer: This is the Scribe of God? He looks like a Fraggle.
Metatron: I'm gonna take that as a compliment. That was an excellent program.
Castiel: Metatron, we are here...
Metatron: I know why you're here, "Asstiel", and I'm not interested. I told you I would rather die than let Dean Winchester use me as his personal punching bag again.
Castiel: Don't worry. Dean's not involved. You're gonna be my punching bag.

"Supernatural: Out with the Old (#7.16)" (2012)
Dean Winchester: Dancers. They are toe shoes full of crazy.
Sam Winchester: And you would know this how?
Dean Winchester: I saw Black Swan. Twice. Hot tutu-on-tutu action. Come on, Sam, what's wrong with you?
Sam Winchester: Wow. The depths of your...

Sam Winchester: It doesn't matter where I go Dean. Lucifer will not shut up.
Dean Winchester: Even now?
Sam Winchester: He's singing Stairway to Heaven right now.
Dean Winchester: Good song.
Sam Winchester: Not fifty times in a row.

"Supernatural: As Time Goes By (#8.12)" (2013)
Sam Winchester: I get it now.
Dean Winchester: Hmm?
Sam Winchester: What Cupid said about heaven busting ass to get Mom and Dad together. The Winchesters and the Campbells - the brains and the brawn.
Dean Winchester: Well, I'm glad you see it. All I see is in our family tree is a whole lot of dead.

Dean Winchester: Yeah, well, either way, Dad hated the son of a bitch.
Sam Winchester: And Dad made up for that how? By being Father of the Year?

"Supernatural: The Prisoner (#10.22)" (2015)
Castiel: [about Rowena] What about her?
Sam Winchester: Guess.
Castiel: I'd be happy to kill her. She just called me a fish.

Castiel: I think the Mark is changing you.
Dean Winchester: You're wrong.
Castiel: Am I? Because the Dean Winchester I know would never have murdered that kid.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, well... that Dean's always been kind of a dick.

"Supernatural: Sex and Violence (#4.14)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: She was a stripper?
Dean Winchester: Dude, her name was Jasmine.

Sam Winchester: You seem pretty cheery.
Dean Winchester: Strippers Sammy, strippers. We are on an actual case involving strippers. Finally.

"Supernatural: Meet the New Boss (#7.1)" (2011)
Preacher: Plenty speak for them and their so-called lifestyle. Media. Hollywood. Lady Gaga won't shut up for love or money.
[churchgoers chuckle]
Preacher: Yeah, funny. But that's why we raise our voices! And picket their so-called weddings, and their funerals. Someone has to speak for God.
Castiel: And who says *you* speak for God? You're wrong. I am utterly indifferent to sexual orientation. On the other hand, I cannot abide hypocrites like you, Reverend.
Preacher: Okay, fun's over, friend.
Castiel: [walking up the aisle] Tell your flock where *your* genitals have been before you speak for Me.
Preacher: And who the heck are *you?*
Castiel: I'm God.
[a parishioner stands up; Castiel renders unconscious the man, who falls back onto the pew with enough force to break it]
Castiel: And he who lies in My name shall choke on his own false tongue, and his poisonous words shall betray him.
[the Reverend chokes, foams at the mouth and drops dead]
Castiel: For I am the Lord, your God.

Castiel: Hello, Crowley. You look stressed.
Crowley: ...Bollocks.

"Supernatural: Dark Dynasty (#10.21)" (2015)
Sam Winchester: [to Castiel and Charlie] Okay, everyone take a breath. Look, we're up against it. Okay? And we've all been up against it before, and we know there are times when every choice sucks. Us... lying to Dean is the choice that sucks the least. We *have* to make this work. Please.

Sam Winchester: What about you? How you doing?
Dean Winchester: Oh, you mean the thing?
[Motioning with his right arm]
Dean Winchester: You know, some dark thoughts. Creepy visions. Violent urges. Same ol'. Same ol'.

"Supernatural: A Little Slice of Kevin (#8.7)" (2012)
Castiel: Everything isn't your responsibility. Getting me out of Purgatory wasn't your responsibility...
Dean Winchester: You *didn't* get out. So, whose fault was it?
Castiel: It's not about fault. It's about will. Dean, do you really not remember?
Dean Winchester: I lived it, Cas. Kay? I *know* what happened.
Castiel: No. No, you think you know. You remembered it the way you needed to.
Dean Winchester: Look, I don't need to feel like Hell for failing you. Okay? For failing you like I failed every other God forsaken thing that I care about! I don't need it!
Castiel: Dean. Just look at it. *Really* look at it.
[He touches Dean's forehead. Dean remembers climbing through the portal and grabbing Cas' hand. But, he now remembers that he didn't let Cas fall but that Cas pulled away]
Castiel: See, it wasn't that I was weak. I was stronger than you. I pulled away. Nothing you could have done would have saved me because I didn't want to be saved.
Dean Winchester: [In disbelief] What the Hell you talkin' about?
Castiel: It's where I belonged. I needed to do penance. After the things I did on Earth and in Heaven, I didn't deserve to be out. And I saw that clearly when I was there. I... I planned to stay all along. I just didn't know how to tell you. You can't save everyone, my friend. You try.
Sam Winchester: [Walking up] Everything okay?
Castiel: Yes. Just setting a few things straight.

Dean Winchester: What the Hell happened? Back there. Purgatory. I told you I would get you out. We were there! It's like you just gave up. It's like you didn't believe we could do it. I mean, you kept saying that you didn't think it would work. Did you not trust me?
Castiel: Dean...
Dean Winchester: I did everything I could to get you out! Everything.
Dean Winchester: I did *not* leave you.
Castiel: So you think this was your fault?

"Supernatural: Southern Comfort (#8.6)" (2012)
Dean Winchester: What are you doing?
Garth Fitzgerald IV: My job, hombre.
Dean Winchester: Your "job"?
Garth Fitzgerald IV: Yes.
Dean Winchester: And since when giving advice is your job?
Sam Winchester: Hold up. Are you the new Bobby?
Dean Winchester: You shut your mouth.
Garth Fitzgerald IV: Yes.
Dean Winchester: You shut your mouth.

Sam Winchester: But I thought the Unknown Soldier was buried in Arlington.
Garth Fitzgerald IV: Yep, but this this the Confederate Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. See, the idea was, they took a faceless, nameless soldier they couldn't identify, and they buried him here to commemorate all the soldiers who died.
Dean Winchester: Did you learn that in college?
Garth Fitzgerald IV: Nope. Civil War re-enactments. Once a year, every year. Don't hate.
Sam Winchester: Okay, uh, what about the guard?
Garth Fitzgerald IV: Uh, he's ceremonial. Gone by dusk.
Dean Winchester: So then we do this tonight?
Garth Fitzgerald IV: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: Burn a confederate soldier's bones in a town of rednecks? Sure.

"Supernatural: The Foundry (#12.3)" (2016)
Rowena: Until you forced me to get back in the game, I'd tried to forget about Lucifer. I loathe him, and I loathe that I had any part in letting him out of the pit he belongs in.
Castiel: So you'll help us, then?
Rowena: Good God, no. That whole FBI pantsuit look? Not my hex bag. But if you get Lucifer cornered and find yourself in need, I'm there.

Lucifer: Red, what did you do?
Rowena: Sped up the decaying process, my Lord. You thought Keith Richards was bad? Try Iggy Pop.
Lucifer: Oh, decapitation is far too merciful for you, Ginger Bitch!

"Supernatural: No Exit (#2.6)" (2006)
Dean Winchester: Los Angeles, California. A young girl got kidnapped by an evil cult.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, and does this girl have a name?
Dean Winchester: Katie Holmes.
Sam Winchester: That's funny... and for you, so bitchy.

Ellen Harvelle: [Sam and Dean walk in on Ellen and Jo fighting] Guys, bad time.
Sam Winchester: Yes mam.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, we rarely drink before ten anyway.

"Supernatural: Everybody Hates Hitler (#8.13)" (2013)
Dean Winchester: Listen, little brother, let's not go all geek on this stuff, okay?
Sam Winchester: "Geek"?

Dean Winchester: [Walks up behind a man crouched behind some trees watching Sam] Hey, pal.
[the man slowly rises to at least a foot taller than Dean. Dean takes in the man's height and size, and his intimidating stance changes to one of conciliation. Dean gives him a shrug and small smile. Cut to a shot of Dean being thrown out of the trees to land several feet away against a car, smashing the window and crumbling to the ground]
Dean Winchester: Ahhhhhhh!
Sam Winchester: Dean?
[Sam sees Dean, and then the big man coming out of the trees. Sam quickly opens the trunk of their car and pulls out a large blade. He turns just as the big man reaches him and swings the blade into the man's arm with no effect. Sam yanks the blade out and the big man grabs Sam by the throat and starts to choke him]
Aaron Bass: Stop.
[the big man lets Sam go]
Dean Winchester: [off camera] Oh, my spleen... Ahh...
Sam Winchester: [looking up at the big man] What. The Hell. Is that?
Aaron Bass: He's a golem. Well, he's my golem.
Sam Winchester: Right.

"Supernatural: Ghostfacers (#3.13)" (2008)
Ed Zeddmore: I know you.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, sure you do. Let's see some identification.
Ed Zeddmore: I know the both of you guys. Yeah, yeah...
Ed Zeddmore: [Ed shakes his head at Sam and Dean]
Sam Winchester: [Sam suddenly recognizes Ed]
Sam Winchester: Holy shit.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: West Texas - that tulpa we had to take out, those two goofballs who almost got us killed? Uh - uh, Hell Hounds, or somethin'?
Dean Winchester: Fuck me.

Dean Winchester: [about the finished Ghostfacers pilot] You know, I kinda think it was half-awesome.
Maggie Zeddmore: Half-awesome? That's full-on good, right?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, I mean, it's bizarre how y'all are able to, uh, to honor Corbett's memory while grossly exploiting the manner of his death. Well done.

"Supernatural: Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid (#5.15)" (2010)
Sheriff Jody Mills: What'd you say your jurisdiction here was again?
Dean Winchester: Our jurisdiction is wherever the United States government sends us.
Sheriff Jody Mills: Uh yeah. How about me and your supervisor have a little chat about that?
Sam Winchester: Absolutely.
[He pulls a business card from his jacket and hands it to the sheriff who dials a number on her cell. Cut to Bobby's house where a phone is ringing]
Bobby Singer: [Picks up the phone marked FBI] Agent Willis speaking.
Sheriff Jody Mills: Agent Willis, this is Sheriff Jody Mills of-
[with a quizzical look]
Sheriff Jody Mills: Bobby?
Bobby Singer: [under his breath] Oh... Excuse me?
Sheriff Jody Mills: [sternly after giving Sam and Dean a look] Is this Bobby Singer?
[Sam and Dean give each other a worried look]
Bobby Singer: Listen, I don't who this is, but this is Agent Tom Willis of the FBI.
Sheriff Jody Mills: Bull crap!
[Disconnects the call and looks at Sam and Dean who have "We're busted" looks on their faces]
Sheriff Jody Mills: FBI, huh?
Sam Winchester: So uh, so you know Bobby Singer.
Dean Winchester: That- that is... a fun coincidence.
Sheriff Jody Mills: Here's what I know about Bobby Singer. He's a menace around here. Assful of drunk and disorderlies, and mail fraud. You understanding me?
Dean Winchester: [quietly, chagrined, while Sam looks down, embarrassed] I think we all can agree that you've made yourself perfectly clear, yes.
Sheriff Jody Mills: So whatever the three of you are planning, it ends here. *Now.* 10-4 on that? Agents?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
[Smiles at her then shakes his head when she leaves]

Bobby Singer: [Sam and Dean join Bobby at the funeral pyre for his wife] So... thinking maybe I should apologize for losing my head back there.
Sam Winchester: Bobby, you don't owe us anything.
Dean Winchester: Hey look, I don't know squat from shinola about love, but... at least you got to spend 5 days with her... Right?
Bobby Singer: Right. Which makes things... about a thousand times worse.
[sighs heavily]
Bobby Singer: She was the love of my life...
[voice breaking]
Bobby Singer: How many times do I gotta kill her?

"Supernatural: Point of No Return (#5.18)" (2010)
Dean Winchester: Screw destiny right in the face. I say we take the fight to them, do it our way.
Sam Winchester: Sounds good.

Street Preacher: [shouting] The end is nigh! The apocalypse is upon us! The angels talk to me, and they asked me to talk to you! The apocalypse...
Dean Winchester: [interrupting] Hey! I'm Dean Winchester. Do you know who I am?
Street Preacher: Dear God!
Dean Winchester: I'll take that as a yes. Listen, I need you to pray to your angel buddies and let them know that I'm here.
Street Preacher: [drops to knees, shouting] Our Father, who art in Heaven, Hallowed be thy name...
Castiel: You pray too loud.

"Supernatural: Bloodlines (#9.20)" (2014)
David Lassiter: Violet's not picking up.
Sam Winchester: Wait, so this girl, she's a shifter, too?
David Lassiter: Werewolf.
Ennis Ross, Dean Winchester: Awesome.
Ennis Ross: If she has her cell, we could trace the signal.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, you might be right. All right. What's her number?
David Lassiter: Take me with you and it's all yours.
Ennis Ross: No! Oh, hell no! Dude, he's a freakin' Transformer.
Dean Winchester: And sometimes you got work with the bad guys to get to the worse guys.

David Lassiter: Violet's not picking up.
Sam Winchester: Wait, so this girl, she's a shifter, too?
David Lassiter: Werewolf.
Dean Winchester, Ennis Ross: [simultaneously] Awesome.
[They give each other a look]
Ennis Ross: If she has her cell, we could trace the signal.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, you might be right. Alright, what's her number?
David Lassiter: Take me with you, it's all yours.
Ennis Ross: No.
[Sam and Dean look at each other]
Ennis Ross: Oh, Hell no!
[to Dean]
Ennis Ross: Dude, he's a frickin' transformer!
Dean Winchester: And sometimes you gotta work with the bad guys to get to the worse guys.
David Lassiter: Dude. I'm right here.
Dean Winchester: [Muttering, uncaring] Yeah, I see ya.

"Supernatural: When the Levee Breaks (#4.21)" (2009)
Young Sam: The answer's yes, you're hallucinating. That's right, it's me. Or I mean it's you.
Sam Winchester: I'm losing my mind.
Young Sam: Definitely.
Sam Winchester: What do you want?
Young Sam: An explanation. How could you do this to me? I thought we were gonna be normal.
Sam Winchester: I tried. I did. It didn't pan out that way. Sorry, kid.
Young Sam: "Sorry, kid?" That's what you have to say? It's all we ever wanted. You were so close! You got away from dad, you quit hunting, you were gonna become a lawyer and get married. Why'd you blow it?
Sam Winchester: Look, they killed Jessica.
Young Sam: Yeah, and if you hadn't run off with Dean, if you'd been there to protect her, she'd still be alive.
Sam Winchester: I know.
Young Sam: Think Jess would want you to turn into this? She loved you! You think she'd be happy, you using her as an excuse?
Sam Winchester: I'm sorry, I am, but life doesn't turn out the way you thought it would when you were 14 years old. We were never gonna be normal, we were never gonna get away. Grow up.
Young Sam: Maybe you're right. Maybe there's, no escape. After all, how can you run from what's inside you?
[eyes turn yellow]

Sam Winchester: Stop bossing me around, Dean. Look. My whole life, you take the wheel, you call the shots, and I trust you because you are my brother. Now I'm asking you, for once, trust me.
Dean Winchester: No. You don't know what you're doing, Sam.
Sam Winchester: Yes, I do.
Dean Winchester: Then that's worse.
Sam Winchester: Why? Look, I'm telling you...
Dean Winchester: Because it's not something that you're doing, it's what you are! It means...
Sam Winchester: What? No. Say it.
Dean Winchester: It means you're a monster.

"Supernatural: Crossroad Blues (#2.8)" (2006)
Sam Winchester: So?
Dean Winchester: The secretary's name is Carly, she's 23, she Kayaks and they're real.
Sam Winchester: You didn't happen to ask her if she has seen any black dogs lately did you?
Dean Winchester: Every complaint called in this week about anything big, black, hairy or doglike. There are 19 calls in all, and ah...
[pulls post-it off of paper]
Dean Winchester: I dont know what this thing is.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] You mean Carly's Myspace address?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, Myspace, what the hell is that?
Sam Winchester: [laughs]
Dean Winchester: Seriously, is that like some sort of porn site?

Sam Winchester: So much for a low profile. You've got a warrant in St. Louis and you're officially in the Fed's database.
Dean Winchester: Dude, I'm like Dillinger or something!
Sam Winchester: Dean, it's not funny. It makes the job harder, we've to be be more careful now.
Dean Winchester: Well, what've they got on you?
Sam Winchester: I'm sure they just haven't posted it yet.
Dean Winchester: Wait, no accessory? Nothing?
Sam Winchester: Shut up.
Dean Winchester: Ha! You're jealous.
Sam Winchester: No I'm not!
Dean Winchester: Alright, what have you got on the case there you innocent, harmless young man you?

"Supernatural: Reichenbach (#10.2)" (2014)
Dean Winchester: So, what are ya gonna do? You gonna kill me?
Sam Winchester: No.
Dean Winchester: Why? You don't know what I've done. I might have it coming.
Sam Winchester: Well, I don't care. Because you are my brother, and I'm here to take you home.

Sam Winchester: You know what, Dean? I saw what happened back there. You coulda killed that guy and you didn't. You took mercy on him.
Dean Winchester: You call that mercy? Imagine you spend your whole life huntin' down the guy that knifed your father. When you finally find him, he whips you like a dog.
[Smiling, with deep satisfaction]
Dean Winchester: How do you think that feels? That kid's gonna spend his whole life knowing that he had his shot and that he couldn't beat me.
Dean Winchester: That ain't mercy. That's the worst thing I coulda done to him. And what I'm gonna do to you, Sammy... Well, that ain't gonna be mercy either.

"Supernatural: Red Meat (#11.17)" (2016)
Sam Winchester: You know we always talk about taking a break, going camping? This could be like camping, it could be fun.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, which part? Freezing our nuts off in the middle of the woods on a thin lead?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, that part.

Sam Winchester: [after Dean has almost killed himself to convince Billie to let Sam go in exchange for Dean's soul] Hey, so - what did you do? When you thought I was dead. What did you do?
Dean Winchester: Thought about redecorating your room, y'know? Putting in a jacuzzi, a nice discoball - really class up the joint.
Sam Winchester: Right. Seriously.
Dean Winchester: What. I uh - I knew you weren't dead.

"Supernatural: Time Is on My Side (#3.15)" (2008)
Sam Winchester: Dean, there's no way she still has the Colt. That was months ago, she probably sold it the second she got it.
Dean Winchester: So then I'll kill her. Win-win.

Doctor: Didn't you read my report?
Dean Winchester: Of course we did. Oh, it was riveting, a real page-turner. Just delightful.
Doctor: You done?
Dean Winchester: I think so.
Doctor: Please, go away.
Dean Winchester: Okay.
Sam Winchester: Sure.

"Supernatural: All Hell Breaks Loose: Part 1 (#2.21)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: Crazy is relative.

Andrew 'Andy' Gallagher: Have you got something of Dean's on you, like something he touched?
Sam Winchester: I've got a receipt, if that'll work?
Andrew 'Andy' Gallagher: Yeah.
[looking at receipt]
Andrew 'Andy' Gallagher: D. Hasselhoff?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, that's Dean's signature. It's hard to explain.

"Supernatural: Repo Man (#7.15)" (2012)
Sam Winchester: I've never seen this spell before.
Lucifer: No, but you've seen this *type*.
Sam Winchester: A demon summoning. Why?
Lucifer: Why? To summon a demon, jackass.

Lucifer: [Oh so pleased with himself after finally getting Sam to respond to him] He said 'shut up' to me.

"Supernatural: Twigs & Twine & Tasha Banes (#12.20)" (2017)
Sam Winchester: You did the right thing. You saved him.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, he seemed super saved.

Sam Winchester: Their mom is on a hunting trip, and she hasn't been home in a week.

"Supernatural: The Hunter Games (#10.10)" (2015)
Metatron: Ain't life a bitch? Nebbishy little guy, me, always sticking it to the lunkhead jocks.
Dean Winchester: You know what? Screw the mark. Let's just kill him.
Metatron: Boy, he really is a mess. Who knew the mark was so toxic? Well... Actually, I did. You know it is going to own you sooner or later.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, so how do we get rid of it?
Metatron: What, just like that, social hour's over?
Sam Winchester: Yes. And now we're moving on to our keynote speaker.
Dean Winchester: Which is you... with us asking the questions and me taking the personal pleasure of carving the answers out of you.
Metatron: Just - whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on there, bad-ass. Lighten up. Why do you just assume I'm not gonna be helpful.
Sam Winchester: Because you're a dickwad.
Metatron: But I'm your dickwad.

Castiel: I like texting. Emoticons.

"Supernatural: Hello, Cruel World (#7.2)" (2011)
Dean Winchester: [Lucifer is impersonating Dean] So, I, uh, followed those swim kid Levia-whatever.
Sam Winchester: To where?
Dean Winchester: Here. Well, back to town. And that ain't the good news.
Sam Winchester: What?
Dean Winchester: There ain't just two of 'em. I don't think.
Sam Winchester: Did you call Bobby?
Dean Winchester: Yeah, he's workin' his own case. I gotta move and I need backup, and that means you.
Sam Winchester: Wh- wait. You sure about that?
Dean Winchester: I know, you're bonkers. But, luckily I just need ya to keep the engine runnin' and wait by the back door. Just don't, uh, don't let Satan change my presets.

Lucifer: [Impersonating Dean. The real Dean has just walked into the warehouse where Lucifer is tormenting Sam] Oh, look, another me.
Dean Winchester: Sam, what are you doing?
[Sam points his gun at the real Dean]
Dean Winchester: Whoa. Whoa!
Sam Winchester: I thought I was with *you*, Dean.
Dean Winchester: Okay. Well, here I am.
Sam Winchester: No. No, I don't- I-
[looks at Lucifer leaning against the wall]
Sam Winchester: I can't know that for sure. You understand me?
Dean Winchester: Okay, then, we're gonna hafta start small.
Sam Winchester: I don't remember driving here.
Lucifer: [to Sam] That's because I drove. You thought.
[shrugs, then to Dean whispering conspiratorially]
Lucifer: Sam is very suggestible.
[Sam fires his gun at Lucifer]
Dean Winchester: Whoa! Whoa! Sam! This discussion does not require a weapon's discharge. Look at me. C'mon. You wanna know what's real? Look, man, I've been to Hell. Okay? I know a thing or two about torture. Enough to know that if feels *different*. Than the pain of this regular... stupid... crappy... *this*!
Sam Winchester: [desperate] No, no, how can know that for sure?
Dean Winchester: Lemme see your hand.
[Sam looks down at his gun hand]
Dean Winchester: No, no. The gimp hand, lemme see it.
Lucifer: [now behind Sam] Well, smell you, Florence Nightingale.
[Sam looks over his shoulder at Lucifer. Dean follows his gaze, then desperately grabs Sam's injured left hand]
Dean Winchester: *Hey!*
[Sam looks at his hand, then at Dean. Sam is starting to calm down]
Dean Winchester: This is real. Not a year ago. Not in Hell. *Now.* I was with you when you cut it. I sewed it up. Look!
[Dean presses the wound on Sam's hand until it bleeds, and grabs the gun in his right. Sam winces]
Lucifer: [now next to Dean, starts to flicker in and out] We've had a lot more with pain.
Dean Winchester: [applying more pressure to Sam's wound] This is *different.* Right? Than the *crap* that's tearin' at your walnut? *I'm* different! Right?
Sam Winchester: [pulls his left hand from Dean and holds it. Dean takes the gun from Sam's right hand] Yeah, I think so.
Lucifer: You sure about that, bunk buddy?
Dean Winchester: Sam.
Lucifer: [flickering in and out again as Sam presses the wound on his hand] Doesn't mean anything.
[Sam looks at Lucifer]
Dean Winchester: Hey.
[pulling Sam's attention back to him]
Dean Winchester: I am your flesh and blood brother. Okay? I am the only who can legitimately kick your ass in real time. You got away. We got you out, Sammy.
Lucifer: Sammy. Sammy, I'm the only one who can-
[flashes in and out again as Sam mercilessly presses his wounded hand]
Dean Winchester: Believe in *that!*
[Lucifer flashes out]
Dean Winchester: Believe *me*, okay? You gotta believe me. You gotta make it stone number one, and *build* on it. You understand?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
[sighing deeply. More Calm down]
Sam Winchester: Yeah, okay.

"Supernatural: Brother's Keeper (#10.23)" (2015)
Sam Winchester: What did Death call this?
Dean Winchester: The Darkness.

Crowley: Who summons anymore? Couldn't you call?
Castiel: You're not in my contacts list.

"Supernatural: The Great Escapist (#8.21)" (2013)
Sam Winchester: You remember when, uh... when Dad took us to the bottom of the Grand Canyon on that pack-mule ride?
Dean Winchester: The what?
Sam Winchester: And your, uh - mule kept farting, just letting go, like gale force.
Dean Winchester: Dude, you were like four years old. I barely remember that.
Sam Winchester: [laughs] You rode a farty donkey.

Naomi: Where is the angel tablet, Castiel?
Castiel: In the words of a... good friend, bite me.
Naomi: Oh, we'll bite. Don't worry.

"Supernatural: Nightshifter (#2.12)" (2007)
Ronald Reznick: Get on the floor, now!
Dean Winchester: Okay, we're doing that. Just don't shoot anybody, especially not us.
Ronald Reznick: I knew it, as soon as you two left. You ain't FBI. Who are you? Who are you working for, huh? The Men in Black? You working for the Mandroid?
Sam Winchester: We're not working for the Mandroid!
Ronald Reznick: You shut up! I ain't talking to you. I don't like you!
Sam Winchester: Fair enough.

Dean Winchester: Friggin' cops.
Sam Winchester: They're just doing their job.
Dean Winchester: No, they're doing OUR job, only they don't know it so they suck at it.

"Supernatural: The Kids Are Alright (#3.2)" (2007)
Ruby: I'm interested in you.
Sam Winchester: Why?
Ruby: Because you're tall I love a tall man. And then there's that whole Anti-Christ thing.

Sam Winchester: [hangs up the phone] I was just ordering pizza.
Dean Winchester: You do know you're in a restaurant?
Sam Winchester: I just felt like pizza.
Dean Winchester: Ok, Weirdy McWeirderson.

"Supernatural: Trial and Error (#8.14)" (2013)
Dean Winchester: I haven't had my own room... ever. I'm making this awesome. I've got my kickass vinyl. I've got this killer mattress. Memory foam - it remembers me. There's no funky smell. There's no creepy motel stains.
[Sam drops a gum wrapper on the floor]
Dean Winchester: Really?
Sam Winchester: Sorry.

Sam Winchester: So, what - G od wants us to take the SATs?
Kevin Tran: Yes. Uh, He works in mysterious ways.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, mysterious douchey ways.

"Supernatural: Love Hurts (#11.13)" (2016)
Dean Winchester: All right, so what do we know? Um, if you kiss someone, and then they die?
Sam Winchester: I guess. Wait a second. You didn't kiss Staci.
Melissa Harper: No, of course not.
Dean Winchester: No, but Dan did.
Sam Winchester: So the curse is transmittable?
Dean Winchester: Like a magic STD. Okay, that works. Kind of makes you nostalgic for good, old-fashioned herpes.

Dean Winchester: Well, the silver lining about being cursed, I finally get some face time with Daisy Duke... my deepest, darkest desire.
Sam Winchester: Seriously?
Dean Winchester: Ever since I was 7.
Sam Winchester: So... Bach, not Simpson?
Dean Winchester: [scoffs] Eh. Guess I would say no to either.

"Supernatural: The Vessel (#11.14)" (2016)
Sam Winchester: Hey, did you know the Nazis had a special branch devoted to archeology?
Dean Winchester: A little early for Nazi trivia, especially without caffeine.

[Dean takes a swig of beer]
Sam Winchester: Seriously? Dude, it's like noon.
Dean Winchester: Uh, well, you drank all the coffee so what am I supposed to drink, water?

"Supernatural: Out of the Darkness, Into the Fire (#11.1)" (2015)
Dean Winchester: [He and Sam are walking back to the car, the left rear tire stick in a muddy hole] We know what she looks like, and we know that she's evil. The question is what does *she* know? I mean, she's been locked away since the beginning of time. Does she even know what a cheeseburger is? All I know is that we set her free, and we're gonna put her back in no matter what it takes.
[He opens the car door, sits down, then immediately gets back out again, looking at the rear tire. He turns to Sam]
Dean Winchester: You let me get in the car?
Sam Winchester: You were on a roll.

Sam Winchester: Hunting things. We're good at that. Sure, we're *great* at that. But, it's only half of the bumper sticker, man.

"Supernatural: Let It Bleed (#6.21)" (2011)
Bobby Singer: Well, that's the bad news. Our pal Cass didn't stop in last night just to mend fences.
Dean Winchester: What did he do?
Bobby Singer: Stole something.
Dean Winchester: What?
Bobby Singer: The journal of one Moishe Campbell.
Sam Winchester: "Moishe"?
Bobby Singer: Of the New York Campbells.
Sam Winchester: Uh, so we gotta get it back, right?
Bobby Singer: Or just read the copy I already made. Hi. Glad to meet you. Bobby Singer, paranoid bastard.

Dean Winchester: All right, so, whose this Phillips guy?
Bobby Singer: Phillips isn't his last name. It's Lovecraft.
Sam Winchester: Wait. H.P. Lovecraft? Let me see that.
Dean Winchester: Am I suppose to know who that is?
Bobby Singer: Horror writer? "At the Mountains of Madness," "The Call of Cthulu."
Dean Winchester: Yeah. No. No, I'm... I was too busy having sex with women.

"Supernatural: Unforgiven (#6.13)" (2011)
Sam Winchester: So, Mel Gibson really took a turn this past year. Huh?
Dean Winchester: Or he's possessed. Seriously, think about it.

Dean Winchester: I hate to say I told you so.
Sam Winchester: You *love* to say I told you so.

"Supernatural: King of the Damned (#9.21)" (2014)
Sam Winchester: I see. I got it.
[talking to Ezra, an angel they're questioning]
Sam Winchester: So, you heard a rumor about Metatron's secret portal
[using air quotes]
Sam Winchester: and you decided to run with it.
Ezra: It's not a rumor. He showed me.
Dean Winchester: Oh. I get it. He's a fan.
Sam Winchester: A fan. Yeah.
Dean Winchester: You're a fan! Look, just cuz you're hot for Metatron... or Beiber... or Beckham, just cuz you know everything about them doesn't mean that you actually *know* them.
Sam Winchester: Or that they even know you exist.
Dean Winchester: Ohhhh, that's cold, Sammy.
Sam Winchester: I'm sayin', man.
Ezra: I was interviewed personally by Metatron for a key post.
Sam Winchester: Yeah? Oh wow, well then- then maybe... you can tell me why you weren't at your key post and you were hanging down here instead.
[long silence]
Dean Winchester: Mmmm. Well, that blows. He got passed over.
Sam Winchester: [exaggerated grimace] Yeah.
Ezra: I was a finalist.
Sam Winchester: [Expressing false sympathy] Oh, man, to get so close and then get kicked downstairs. It sucks to be you.
[Dean whistles]

"Supernatural: Skin (#1.6)" (2005)
Dean Winchester: I think we're getting closer to its lair.
Sam Winchester: How can you tell?
Dean Winchester: Because there's another puke-inducing pile next to your face.

"Supernatural: Bloody Mary (#1.5)" (2005)
[Jill has been killed by Bloody Mary]
Charlie: [sobbing] ... And they found her on the bathroom floor, and h-h-her, her *eyes*... they were g-gone.
Sam Winchester: I'm sorry.
Charlie: And she said it! I heard her say it! But it couldn't be because of that. I'm insane, right?
Dean Winchester: No, you're not insane.
Charlie: [softly] Oh God, that makes me feel so much worse.
Sam Winchester: Look, we think something's happening here. Something that can't be explained.
Dean Winchester: And we're gonna stop it.

"Supernatural: The Man Who Knew Too Much (#6.22)" (2011)
[last line of the episode/season]
Castiel: I'm not an angel anymore. I'm your new God. A better one. So you will bow down and profess your love unto me, your Lord... or I shall destroy you.

"Supernatural: Meta Fiction (#9.18)" (2014)
Castiel: [to Sam and Dean on his cell phone, looking at a sign in his motel room] Honor bar. What's honorable about a miniature bar in a motel room?
Dean Winchester: [with a smile] Everything.

"Supernatural: Weekend at Bobby's (#6.4)" (2010)
Bobby Singer: I appreciate you boys lending a hand.
Dean Winchester: Hey, any time we get to punk Crowley works for us.
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
Bobby Singer: Still... knowing how much you love flying, the friendly skies... I guess a nine-hour plane trip was no picnic. You drink your way through it?
Dean Winchester: I was fine.
Sam Winchester: No. He white-knuckled his way through four puke bags.
Dean Winchester: Well, at least I was sober. Some nutjob decided to try something, I was ready. I had a fork.

"Supernatural: After School Special (#4.13)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: I'm not evil, Dirk, I'm not. And neither were you. Trust me, I've seen real evil... We were scared and miserable, and we took it out on each other, us and everybody else. That's high school. But you duffer through that, and it gets better.

"Supernatural: We Happy Few (#11.22)" (2016)
Lucifer: Screw you. Screw all of you!
Chuck Shurley: [to Sam and Dean] Kids, huh?

"Supernatural: Heartache (#8.3)" (2012)
Dean Winchester: Wow. Guy goes to Purgatory for a year, all hell breaks loose. Check this out. Jogger in Minneapolis gets his heart ripped out.
Sam Winchester: I'm guessing literally.
Dean Winchester: Only way that interests me. And then, there's another article from six months ago. Same thing happens, also in Minneapolis. What's that tell us?
Sam Winchester: Stay out of Minneapolis.

"Supernatural: Hammer of the Gods (#5.19)" (2010)
Baldur: You think you own the planet? What gives you the right?
Lucifer: No one gives us the right. We take it.

"Supernatural: Fallen Idols (#5.5)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: How long am I going to be on double secret probation?

"Supernatural: Appointment in Samarra (#6.11)" (2010)
Balthazar: Well, here's one for the list of dumbest things ever. Summon the angel who wants to kill you.
Sam Winchester: Desperate times. I need your help, Balthazar.
Balthazar: Interesting. Since last time we met, you wanted to, what was it? Oh yes, yes. "Fry my wings, extra crispy."
Sam Winchester: Well, that was a misunderstanding.
Balthazar: Some misunderstanding.

"Supernatural: Dog Dean Afternoon (#9.5)" (2013)
Dean Winchester: Wait a minute. Can I hear all animals?
Colonel the Dog: Yep. Animals have a universal language - like Esperanto. But this one actually caught on.
Pigeon: And I'm just getting started, too. Brewing a real big one. Ha. Bet your ride's gonna look sweet in white.
Sam Winchester: What's he saying?
Dean Winchester: You - He's being a douchebag!
Pigeon: Who are you calling "douchebag", douchebag?
Dean Winchester: Oh, shut it, you winged rat!
Sam Winchester: Dude.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: Hey. Just calm down. Just get in the car.
Pigeon: Ha ha. That's right, Sally. Go cry to Mama.
Dean Winchester: [pulls out his gun] Oh, that's it, you son of a bitch!

"Supernatural: Slumber Party (#9.4)" (2013)
Sam Winchester: [to Charlie] So, you've been hunting.
Dean Winchester: [sternly] Alone.
Charlie Bradbury: I know. Not a good idea, according to the Supernatural books.
Sam Winchester: You really can't delete those from the internet?
Charlie Bradbury: Not even I can do that. I mean, c'mon.
Dean Winchester: Where do you even find them?
Charlie Bradbury: A top secret place I call Amazon.
[Dean looks exasperated]
Charlie Bradbury: And someone uploaded all the unpublished works. I thought it was fan fic at first, but it was clearly Edlund's work.
Sam Winchester: Who uploaded it?
Charlie Bradbury: I don't know. Their screen name was beckywinchester176. Ring a bell?
[Dean gives Sam a hard, frustrated look]
Sam Winchester: None. Uh, nobody's. Uh, no, there are no bells. Uh... No.

"Supernatural: Clip Show (#8.22)" (2013)
Castiel: I like this bunker. It's orderly.
Sam Winchester: Oh, give us a few months. Dean wants to get a ping-pong table.
Castiel: I've heard that. It's a game, right?

"Supernatural: #thinman (#9.15)" (2014)
Dean Winchester: You know what video would have gone viral, if we still had it? When you were five and got dressed up as Batman and jumped off the shed 'cause you thought you could fly.
Sam Winchester: After you jumped first.
Dean Winchester: Hey, I was nine, and was dressed up as Superman. okay? Everybody knows Batman can't fly.
Sam Winchester: Well, I didn't know that. I broke my arm.
Dean Winchester: I know you did. Man, I drove you to the E.R. on my handlebars.

"Supernatural: There's Something About Mary (#12.21)" (2017)
Sam Winchester: I wanna punch something in the face.

"Supernatural: Heaven Can't Wait (#9.6)" (2013)
Dean Winchester: I'll have some beef jerky and a pack of menthols.
Castiel: What are you doing here?
Dean Winchester: Gee, it's nice to see you too, Cas.
Castiel: It's Steve now. And, uh, you surprised me.
Dean Winchester: Well, the feeling is mutual. I mean, I knew you had to lay low from the angel threat, but, uh... Wow. This is some cover.
Castiel: My grace is gone. What did you expect? Do you have any idea how hard it was? When I fell to earth, I didn't just lose my powers. I- I had nothing.
[with pride]
Castiel: Now, I'm a sales associate.
Dean Winchester: A sales associate.
Vendor: Hey, Steve. Can you sign here?
[hands clipboard to Cas who signs it and hands it back]
Castiel: I'm responsible for inventory, sales, customer service. I keep this place - thank you - clean and presentable. And when my manager's busy, I even prepare the food.
Dean Winchester: Wow. So you went from fighting heavenly battles to nuking taquitos?
Castiel: [nodding proudly] Nachos too.

"Supernatural: First Born (#9.11)" (2014)
Castiel: Why must the Winchesters run toward death?
Sam Winchester: No, don't. Don't. Don't stop.
Castiel: Sam, when I was human, I died, and that showed me that life is precious, and it must be protected at all costs, even a life as... as pig-headed as a Winchester's.
Sam Winchester: My life's not worth any more than anyone else's. Not yours or Dean's... or Kevin's.

"Supernatural: Remember the Titans (#8.16)" (2013)
Sam Winchester: So you know who this is, Dean, walking us to our death?
Dean Winchester: Don't know. Don't care.
Sam Winchester: It's *our* God, Artemis - the goddess of hunters.
Dean Winchester: Oh, that's fascinating.
Sam Winchester: See, she's who we'd pray to for courage when hunting the Gorgon or the Minotaur. Of course, she's not really worship worthy anymore, uh, having lost a step and all.
Artemis: [slams them against a wall] The hell I have.
Dean Winchester: Really Sam? Trash-talking a God? Seriously?

"Supernatural: First Blood (#12.9)" (2017)
Castiel: You know this world, this sad, doomed little world,it needs you. It needs every last Winchester it can get, and I won't let you die, I won't let any of you die.

"Supernatural: Into the Mystic (#11.11)" (2016)
Sam Winchester: Turns out Harold was stealing the other residents' Viagra.
Dean Winchester: I know. A real dick move, huh?

"Supernatural: The Rapture (#4.20)" (2009)
Sam Winchester: Sorry, uh, this is funny to you?
Dean Winchester: Mr. Big-Bad-Prison-Guard Jimmy McMook gives you the slip? Yeah, it's pretty funny. What were you doing anyway?
Sam Winchester: I was getting a Coke!
Dean Winchester: [sarcastically] Was it a refreshing Coke?

"Supernatural: Don't You Forget About Me (#11.12)" (2016)
Dean Winchester: You know there are starving children out there.
Sam Winchester: Dude, I'm not gonna survive hundreds of monster attacks to get flatlined by - by some double doughnut monstrosity.
Dean Winchester: The Elvis!
Sam Winchester: Whatever it... How many calories are in that thing?

"Supernatural: Mother's Little Helper (#9.17)" (2014)
Sam Winchester: Can I ask you something?
Julia Wilkinson: If it's for a date, I'm sorry. I never see anyone under 65. Too much drama.

"Supernatural: Swap Meat (#5.12)" (2010)
[after finding Gary's school book]
Sam Winchester: Smart kid.
[after finding a "Star Wars" t-shirt]
Sam Winchester: Virgin.
[after finding pornography magazines]
Sam Winchester: Frustrated virgin.

"Supernatural: Roadkill (#2.16)" (2007)
Sam Winchester: Should've thought of it.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: It's an old country custom Dean. Planting a tree as a grave marker.
Dean Winchester: You're like a walking encyclopedia of weirdness.
[walks off]
Sam Winchester: [calls after him] Yeah, I know.

"Supernatural: Don't Call Me Shurley (#11.20)" (2016)
Sam Winchester: [to Dean] Dude, quit ironing my shirts with beer.

"Supernatural: Regarding Dean (#12.11)" (2017)
Sam Winchester: Hey. Is that it? Is it done?
Dean Winchester: Who is this hippie?
Dean Winchester: Look at his face. Oh! Kind of like the time when I ate all of your Halloween candy. You remember that? Classic.
Sam Winchester: Not funny.

"Supernatural: The Devil You Know (#5.20)" (2010)
Dean Winchester: [wearing a medical mask] Hey, check it out, I look like the King of Pop.
[Sam rolls his eyes]
Dean Winchester: Too soon?
Sam Winchester: Too soon.

"Supernatural: Ladies Drink Free (#12.16)" (2017)
Sam Winchester: Sorry to bother you. Agent McVie. This is my partner, Agent Fleetwood.

"Supernatural: The Future (#12.19)" (2017)
Castiel: I am not someone that you should put your faith in.

"Supernatural: Rock and a Hard Place (#9.8)" (2013)
Suzy Lee: Sam. What brought you here to reclaim your virginity?
Sam Winchester: Well. I guess it's because every- woman I've- ever- had relations with, uh, it- hasn't- ended well.
Dean Winchester: [big grin] He ain't lyin'.

"Supernatural: Death's Door (#7.10)" (2011)
Dean Winchester: All right, scoot, jerkface. Show your elders some respect.
Sam Winchester: You scoot, asshat.
Dean Winchester: Did we get licorice?
Sam Winchester: No, we did not get licorice. We got good snacks. Licorice is disgusting.
Dean Winchester: I'm sorry, I didn't quite understand that, uh, Mr. "Peanut Butter and Banana Sandwich."
Sam Winchester: I stand by that sandwich. Nobody likes licorice. It's - it's made of dirt.
Dean Winchester: It is a classic movie food. It's right up there with popcorn.
Sam Winchester: Popcorn?
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Sam Winchester: You're out of your mind.
Dean Winchester: What, it's like little chewy pieces of heaven.

"Supernatural: Plush (#11.7)" (2015)
Dean Winchester: Hey, it's none of our business, but it looks like somebody might have a crush.
Sheriff Donna Hanscum: I was born at night, Dean. Not last night.
Sam Winchester: What's the deal? He seems nice.
Sheriff Donna Hanscum: He is! But he's a cop... named Doug. I mean, clearly, I have a type. But no, thank you, ma'am. Won't be once bitten, twice Doug'd.

"Supernatural: Of Grave Importance (#7.19)" (2012)
Sam Winchester: You know she and Bobby had a thing, right?
Dean Winchester: Yeah!... Yeah, I knew that.
Dean Winchester: Really?
Sam Winchester: Yeah! Kind of a foxhole thing. Very Hemingway!
Dean Winchester: Huh...
Dean Winchester: She and I kinda went Hemingway this one time, too.
Sam Winchester: Alright, well...
[with a creeped out look]
Sam Winchester: that happens.
[they awkwardly stare at each other]
Dean Winchester: Wait, you too?
Sam Winchester: Look, it was a while back. We ended up on the same case; she was stressed and I... I didn't have a soul?
Dean Winchester: That's a lot of foxholes.

"Supernatural: I Think I'm Gonna Like It Here (#9.1)" (2013)
Death: I must admit when I heard it was you, well... I had to come myself.
Sam Winchester: I bet you get off on this.
Death: Perhaps. But not in the way you assume. I consider it quite the honor to be collecting the likes of Sam Winchester. I try so hard not to pass judgment at times like this. Not my bag, you see, but you.
[with respect]
Death: Well played, my boy.

"Supernatural: Road Trip (#9.10)" (2014)
Dean Winchester: Cas, I'm sorry.
Castiel: About what?
Dean Winchester: Kicking you out of the bunker. That's uh- you know, not telling you about Sam.
Castiel: His life was at stake.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, I got played.
Castiel: I thought I was saving Heaven. I got played, too.
Dean Winchester: So, you're saying we're both a couple of dumb asses?
Castiel: I prefer the word trusting. Less dumb. Less ass.

"Supernatural: Holy Terror (#9.9)" (2013)
Sam Winchester: [Sam and Dean have gone to the scene of an angel battle and find Cas impersonating an FBI agent and investigating] Cas, you know this is an angel situation, right? I mean, you left that night because angels were on your ass.
Dean Winchester: Yeah, and you were given new life, early retirement, working your way up the Gas & Sip ladder.
Castiel: Well, if angels are slaughtering one another, I have to do what I can to help. It's a risk we should be willing to take. Don't you think?
[gives them both a smile]
Castiel: Hey, Cas is back in town.
Dean Winchester: Seriously. Did you- did he just say that?