Grace Van Pelt
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Quotes for
Grace Van Pelt (Character)
from "The Mentalist" (2008)

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"The Mentalist: Miss Red (#1.21)" (2009)
Grace Van Pelt: The AMA and Boston General both have records of a doctor named Brooke Harper.
Teresa Lisbon: See?
Grace Van Pelt: Uh, but it says here that she's 64 years old.
Patrick Jane: Wow. She looks pretty good.
Teresa Lisbon: Is there a word for uncanny, yet irritating?

Teresa Lisbon: And besides, this is a simple plan. It's when you start getting costumes and props that I get nervous.
Grace Van Pelt: Trick plays like this, my dad calls them "Chewing Gum" plays. Sometimes you fool the other guy, and sometimes you end up with gum in your hair.

Grace Van Pelt: That Kathryn Stubbs? She's... she's an unhappy person.
Teresa Lisbon: Where's Rigsby?
Grace Van Pelt: He went to get his prescription filled. I think that Kathryn woman actually made him worse.

Teresa Lisbon: You coming?
Grace Van Pelt: He's not feeling well. Stomach.
Wayne Rigsby: I'm fine.
Teresa Lisbon: You get me sick, I'm gonna put you stakeout for a month.

Teresa Lisbon: What do we got?
Grace Van Pelt: Jim Gulbrand, CEO and founder of the software company Gaia Matrix was reported missing by his live-in brother yesterday. Local P.D. responded to the call, but they didn't check the boat until this morning. They found blood on the deck, but no sign of a body.
Teresa Lisbon: Why is it ours?
Grace Van Pelt: The marina is privately owned, all leased by the city of Sausalito. It was local P.D.'s decision whether or not to take the case.
Teresa Lisbon: High-profile missing persons case. Wonder why they wouldn't take that.

"The Mentalist: Seeing Red (#1.7)" (2008)
Grace Van Pelt: [referring to Kristina Frye] Excuse me, but you might consider the possibility that she's actually honestly in touch with something beyond your understanding.
Patrick Jane: That would be golf and musical theater of the '30s and '40s.

Kristina Frye: I think it's important to love oneself. How you do you feel about yourself?
Patrick Jane: Oh.
[Jane chuckles]
Patrick Jane: You tell me. And forget about the $500 an hour. I'm on Civil Service pay.
Kristina Frye: Okay, for free then. I think you act assured and arrogant but inside you're troubled with deep guilt and self-loathing. A recent trauma in your past perhaps. But you're more than a little unstable.
[to Lisbon]
Kristina Frye: You have your work cut out for you.
Grace Van Pelt: You *are* good.

Wayne Rigsby: [Jeremy enters half dressed with a can of whipped cream] Hi Jeremy.
Jeremy Hale: Hey.
Grace Van Pelt: Let's go talk. You might want some clothes.
Wayne Rigsby: Or a lot more whipped cream. Your call.

Grace Van Pelt: It's really important to you that Kristina's a fake, isn't it? Because if she's not. If she does have a gift, everything you mock, everything you discredit, everything you stand for gets turned upside down.
Patrick Jane: Um
[Jane clears his throat]
Patrick Jane: Yeah. True. Unlikely, but true.

"The Mentalist: Red Scare (#2.5)" (2009)
Grace Van Pelt: What was that?
Wayne Rigsby: Probably rats.
Grace Van Pelt: Ugh, God no. I *hate* rats.
Wayne Rigsby: Oh it's just a ghost then.
Grace Van Pelt: You don't believe in ghosts.
Wayne Rigsby: Yeah, but you do. Go upstairs if you like. I'll take this one.
Grace Van Pelt: Oh, thanks. That's okay.

Wayne Rigsby: Grace, I love you. I've loved you from the first moment I met you. Screw the rules. Screw CBI. I need you.
Grace Van Pelt: I... uh- that's... um
Wayne Rigsby: Unless you stop me, I'm going to kiss you now.

Grace Van Pelt: [to Rigsby] Listen about the other thing. It's... I, uh... maybe it's not the right time.

Grace Van Pelt: So what was it?
Patrick Jane: Beckworth was a collector. He collected hundreds of one thing. Some of the rarest, finest examples in the world. Worth *tens* of millions of dollars.
Teresa Lisbon: So what was it?
Patrick Jane: [Jane sniffs his drink] Mmm.
Teresa Lisbon: What?
Patrick Jane: Smells good.
[Everyone realizes what's in Beckworth's treasure]

"The Mentalist: Ring Around the Rosie (#4.4)" (2011)
Teresa Lisbon: Listen up here, Willie. Some of the stuff you're carrying you came off a dead man.
Willie Shubert: That's not good.
Grace Van Pelt: Neither is the dried blood on your shirt. How'd that get there?
Willie Shubert: Let's see uh... I got the blood on me when I was stabbing that fella in the alley.

Luther Wainwright: We'll arrest Henry Tibbs on a felony weapons charge, then we can insist on counseling.
Kimball Cho: What happens in a couple months when he hits the streets?
Luther Wainwright: He reports to parole.
Grace Van Pelt: We all know who effective that is.

Grace Van Pelt: If you quit now, you're going to miss the best part - payback.
Linda Tibbs: What are you talking about.
Grace Van Pelt: A few months ago, I had a fiancé who - he tried to kill me.
Linda Tibbs: You're lying.
Grace Van Pelt: Everybody thought he was the greatest guy - including me... until he pulled a gun.
Linda Tibbs: What did you do?
Grace Van Pelt: I shot him.
Wayne Rigsby: Dead.

"The Mentalist: Something Rotten in Redmund (#4.20)" (2012)
[Jane and Van Pelt are slumped onto Jane's couch watching video surveillance from the high school principal's "illegal" feed]
Grace Van Pelt: We've watched 60 hours' worth of footage. I think it's a dead end.
Patrick Jane: Patience, grasshopper.
Grace Van Pelt: I am being patient.
Patrick Jane: There. Back that up.
Grace Van Pelt: Okay.
Patrick Jane: Can you... can you grow that? Can you... can you biggify it?
Grace Van Pelt: [Smirking] I can do a digital zoom.
Patrick Jane: Good.

Ms. Austin: I know what I did to Mr. McTierney is unforgivable, and I wish to God I could undo it, but you have to understand. What Billy and I have is special. It's real. I'm not some pervert. I love him, and he loves me. Is that wrong?
Grace Van Pelt: Yes.

Grace Van Pelt: Hey, how did you know Billy was having an affair with the teacher?
Patrick Jane: They both had leaves on them from their make-out spot in the woods.
Grace Van Pelt: That's it?
Patrick Jane: Well, plus I could see she liked him. She was meaner to him than the other kids. You know, like Lisbon is to me.
Teresa Lisbon: [Clicks tongue] Shut up!
Patrick Jane: See?

"The Mentalist: A Price Above Rubies (#2.9)" (2009)
Patrick Jane: My provisional bet? Provisional? Carl Ward.
Grace Van Pelt: Hello? He was shot 3 times.
Patrick Jane: The best accomplice is a dead one.
Wayne Rigsby: He's not dead.
Patrick Jane: Nobody's perfect.
Teresa Lisbon: That's it? Carl Ward is crooked because he got shot?
Patrick Jane: He's an ex tennis pro.
Wayne Rigsby: So?
Patrick Jane: Shady people. By definition, disappointed. Should be on center court at Wimbledon, instead he's tossing lobs to rich old ladies. Makes him bitter and twisted.
Teresa Lisbon: [sarcastically] Case closed.

Patrick Jane: Rigsby put something in your pocket.
Grace Van Pelt: Huh?
[Van Pelt reaches into her pocket and pulls out a diamond]
Grace Van Pelt: Wow!
[Van Pelt looks at Rigsby]
Wayne Rigsby: H-he's messing with you!
[Van Pelt looks at Jane]
Patrick Jane: Uh, it's compressed carbon. If you want to keep it, I don't know about Rigsby, but I wouldn't tell a soul.

Grace Van Pelt: Is this all it's going to be? Sneaking around all the time, afraid someone's going to find out.
Wayne Rigsby: No. It's just the bureau rules. Rules are rules, right?
Grace Van Pelt: Maybe I'm sick of the rules.

"The Mentalist: Red Hair and Silver Tape (#1.2)" (2008)
Grace Van Pelt: [sighs] Let's do it.
Wayne Rigsby: [Eats some of his food] Not yet.
Grace Van Pelt: Why not?
Wayne Rigsby: This is actually quite good.
[Grace rises up and slaps him]

Grace Van Pelt: One crazy evil person, I understand, but two? Husband and wife? Marriage is supposed to be a sacred loving thing.
Patrick Jane: They were soulmates in their own strange way.

Grace Van Pelt: I don't get it. She actually enjoyed helping him kill. One crazy, evil person I understand, but two? Husband and wife? Marriage is supposed to be a sacred, loving thing.
Patrick Jane: Yeah, they were soul-mates in their own strange way.

"The Mentalist: Bleeding Heart (#2.12)" (2010)
Teresa Lisbon: You guys look into this Jasper character.
Patrick Jane: Don't bother, he's a red herring.
Grace Van Pelt: What does it mean anyway? "A red herring?"
Teresa Lisbon: A red herring is what you look into regardless of what Jane tells you.

Grace Van Pelt: I've learned about myself as well as about other people. Stuff I wish I didn't know sometimes.
Mike Brewster: Stuff like?
Grace Van Pelt: Why people do bad things do to one another. It's mainly because of secrets. Trying to hide the truth chips away at your spirit. Secrets... ruin relationships.

Wayne Rigsby: So, uh, guys. I have something to say.
Grace Van Pelt: *We* have something to say.
Wayne Rigsby: Uh, life's too short for dishonest. Van P... Grace and I are... lovers.

"The Mentalist: Aingavite Baa (#2.18)" (2010)
Madeleine Hightower: [to Rigsby, Van Pelt & Lisbon] You work together, you develop feelings. Nothing wrong with that. But you know very well it's against CBI rules, and like I tell my kids: rules are rules. If you want to stay together that's your choice, but one of you has to transfer out of the unit. If you both want to stay in the unit, then you can't be together. That's what it is. Give me your decision by tomorrow at the latest... Questions?
Grace Van Pelt: No ma'am.

Grace Van Pelt: There's one piece of good news. We ran you through the fingerprints database. You're not up there.
Jane Doe: How is that good news?
Grace Van Pelt: It means you're not a criminal, or you're a very very good one.

Grace Van Pelt: You'd be leaving the unit - for us. I don't want the responsibility. You'll hate me for it. Maybe not today, but someday you will.
Wayne Rigsby: No Grace, we...
Grace Van Pelt: I'm sorry.

"The Mentalist: The Scarlet Letter (#2.2)" (2009)
Kimball Cho: If she's a jumper, job's done.
Wayne Rigsby: Yeah. The senator's husband dumps her, she wants to make him feel bad
[Rigsby whistles]
Wayne Rigsby: splat.
Grace Van Pelt: Don't talk that way.
Wayne Rigsby: Okay not splat, bam.

Teresa Lisbon: Main thing is you keep him in there long enough for us to search his car. Be friendly, he thinks he's a player, he'll eat it up.
Grace Van Pelt: What do mean "be friendly?"
Teresa Lisbon: Need a map?... Good luck.

Wayne Rigsby: You've any plans for tonight?
Grace Van Pelt: Home, TV.
Wayne Rigsby: Well, have fun.
Grace Van Pelt: You too.
[walks off]
Kimball Cho: You're gonna die alone

"The Mentalist: Red Badge (#2.3)" (2009)
Teresa Lisbon: All right then, look in the dumpsters. Let's get out of here.
Grace Van Pelt: I did it last time.
Wayne Rigsby: Aw man, I just got this suit.
Kimball Cho: Okay, rock/paper/scissors on three: one... two... three.

[the team is looking at old articles about Lisbon]
Grace Van Pelt: Look, another one, Lisbon was like a rock star for awhile.
Kimball Cho: What's with her hair?

Grace Van Pelt: How 'bout you give us a statement, maybe help yourself?
Milton Howard: How 'bout you kiss me? You're pretty.
Grace Van Pelt: So are you. Compared to most state prison inmates.

"The Mentalist: Russet Potatoes (#1.18)" (2009)
Dr. Royston Daniel: You're ambitious, more than you'll let anyone see. Girl from Nowheresville, destined to make it big. But you worry that you'll always be small town, small time, you haven't got what it takes. And that's why you're so shut out to everything but this job.
Grace Van Pelt: Dr. Daniel, no offense but I've been working with Patrick Jane for 9 months now. You want to get under my skin? You're going to have to up your game.

Grace Van Pelt: [after Rigsby kisses Van Pelt under hypnotic suggestion] Well, unhypnotize him.
Patrick Jane: You sure?
Grace Van Pelt: Do it!

Wayne Rigsby: Did I make a fool of myself? Cluck like a chicken. I didn't do Tina Turner, did I?
Grace Van Pelt: No. You were perfectly normal.
[Van Pelt leaves]
Wayne Rigsby: Oh good. That's relief, eh?
Patrick Jane: Coward!

"The Mentalist: Red Sauce (#1.20)" (2009)
Patrick Jane: You really think I would forget your birthday present?
[Lisbon nods]
Grace Van Pelt: [leaving to answer a phone call] Van Pelt.
Patrick Jane: It's on its way!
Teresa Lisbon: Yeah, right.
Patrick Jane: Little grumpy 'cause I didn't buy you a pony?

Teresa Lisbon: You and Rigsby stay here. Talk to the kids Didrikson kept in line; see if they have the same take on the guy. Cho, Van Pelt, and are gonna go talk to the wife.
Patrick Jane: All right. We'll see you later.
Grace Van Pelt: Bye.
Wayne Rigsby: Bye. Teenagers. I hate questioning teenagers. It's like talking to mud.
Patrick Jane: You need some love in your heart.
Wayne Rigsby: Oh, is that my problem?
Patrick Jane: Yeah, it is. Stay close.

Patrick Jane: [dialing a number on his phone and handing it to Van Pelt] When someone answers, can you say "Is Mary there"?
Grace Van Pelt: Why?
Patrick Jane: Just for fun.
Santino 'Sonny' Battaglia: [at the golf course, Battaglia is on the other end of the phone call] Huh?
Grace Van Pelt: Hi. Is, um... is Mary there?
Santino 'Sonny' Battaglia: No, lady, it's the wrong number.
Grace Van Pelt: [hanging up] Wrong number. What was that about?
Patrick Jane: Groundwork.

"The Mentalist: Little Red Book (#4.2)" (2011)
Therapist: Grace, somebody you trusted and loved betrayed you. Betrayed you so badly you had to take his life. That needs to be talked about.
Grace Van Pelt: It could've been worse. I could've married him.

Teresa Lisbon: Oh God! Why are you doing this? You were okay. All you had to do was keep your heads down.
Grace Van Pelt: We wanna work for you.
Teresa Lisbon: ...Let me talk to Jane alone.

"The Mentalist: Crimson Casanova (#1.14)" (2009)
Patrick Jane: All you need is a basic understanding of the evolutionary psychology of women, rigorously and fearlessly applied. You gotta know what buttons to press.
Teresa Lisbon: Like we're toasters.
Grace Van Pelt: Like men don't have buttons too.
Patrick Jane: Men are like toasters. Women, a little more like, uh... accordians.

Wayne Rigsby: I don't believe this guy. I give up! I do not understand women. Never have, never will. Seems like the dumber you treat them, the better they like it.
Grace Van Pelt: They're *drunk* women. You can't generalize all women in general.
Teresa Lisbon: [Whispers to Simon] This is your fault.
Patrick Jane: No, it's not. I'm just sitting here.

"The Mentalist: Blood for Blood (#3.14)" (2011)
LaRoche.: I need assistance with my investigation into his murder. I need someone... trustworthy.
Grace Van Pelt: "Assistance?" You have a whole unit.
LaRoche.: I need you.
Grace Van Pelt: Me? Do you have suspect?... Is it someone I work with?
LaRoche.: We'll discuss the specifics at a later point. But essentially, all you have to do is keep your eyes open, and at a later point you might be asked to wear a wire.

Grace Van Pelt: I thought you heard my news already. And I really wanted to tell you myself.
[Van Pelt sighs]
Grace Van Pelt: Craig asked me to marry him and I said yes.
[Van Pelt shows Rigsby her engagement ring]
Wayne Rigsby: That's... wonderful, Grace.
[Rigsby hugs Van Pelt]
Wayne Rigsby: That's terrific news. He's a great guy.

"The Mentalist: Bloodshot (#1.16)" (2009)
Grace Van Pelt: Hey, aren't you supposed to be in the hospital?
Patrick Jane: Nope.
Grace Van Pelt: Yes. You are.
Patrick Jane: No. They had enough of me. Can't say I blame 'em.

Grace Van Pelt: And no offense, but why is my person life have any concern to you? Or Rigsby, for that matter?
Patrick Jane: Who me? I'm just nosy. But Rigsby, he loves you... He's just scared of emotional committment. And you're attracted to him, but you're deeply repressed and emotionally shutdown.

"The Mentalist: Red Rum (#1.12)" (2009)
Wayne Rigsby: Oh my god! Where's my food?
[holding up a bag of carrots]
Wayne Rigsby: What is this?
Grace Van Pelt: That is healthy and nutritious snacking.
Wayne Rigsby: I'm going to die.
[Van Pelt chuckles sarcastically]
Wayne Rigsby: Seriously, I'm allergic to carrots.

Wayne Rigsby: It's just a silly alternative lifestyle: like Star Trek or yoga.
Grace Van Pelt: I do yoga.
[Rigsby clears his throat]

"The Mentalist: Like a Redheaded Stepchild (#3.21)" (2011)
Grace Van Pelt: [after Rigsby gets Corwin to exit the Meth House by blocking the smoke stack] Pretty good trick.
Wayne Rigsby: Yep. Always worked on my dad.

Wayne Rigsby: Wait, there's one more thing: I'm sorry but I'm not going to be at your wedding.
Grace Van Pelt: Oh?
[Van Pelt sighs]
Grace Van Pelt: That's too bad. You have something else planned for that day?
Wayne Rigsby: No,you see the problem is: I'm still in love with you.
Grace Van Pelt: You can't...
Wayne Rigsby: Hold on. I'm not trying to win you back. You're marrying a good man. That's not gonna change. But neither am I. This whole thing where we pretend we're just friends, it doesn't work. I don't know what will work. But I know one thing: I can't watch you marry another man. You have a good day, and a good life.

"The Mentalist: Throwing Fire (#2.10)" (2009)
Wayne Rigsby: $20 million, that's a pretty good motive. $20 million - I'd kill you.
Grace Van Pelt: Oh, really?
Wayne Rigsby: No. I mean, um, kidding. It's a joke.

Grace Van Pelt: My sister, she was just like you.
Leslie: Look, I don't - I don't want to hear this.
Grace Van Pelt: She wanted it to be over - for *her*. It was always about her. She could've talked to me.
Leslie: About what?
Grace Van Pelt: About anything. I'm her sister. But she didn't. Not to anybody. She just ended it for *her*.

"The Mentalist: Redline (#2.13)" (2010)
Wayne Rigsby: I-I-I meant stupid if we got married today.
Grace Van Pelt: But what about tomorrow? I mean long term, where are we going?
Wayne Rigsby: Uh, do we have to discuss this right now?
Grace Van Pelt: Yeah! We probably should have done it before we announced our relationship and I endangered my job!
Wayne Rigsby: My job's on the line too!
Grace Van Pelt: That's not what you said before!

Teresa Lisbon: You didn't tell me.
Wayne Rigsby: Excuse me?
Teresa Lisbon: That you're together. You didn't say it, I didn't hear you. There are no rules being broken that I'm aware of. No holding hands, no soulful looks, and absolutely no kissing in the office.
Grace Van Pelt: No problem.
Wayne Rigsby: Fine.

"The Mentalist: Rose-Colored Glasses (#2.11)" (2010)
Grace Van Pelt: A little old to be necking, aren't they?
Patrick Jane: There's an age limit on that?

Kimball Cho: Terence Badali? CBI. I need to talk to you about Jana Vickers.
Terence Badali: [to the person with whom he's on the phone] I'll call you back.
[he hangs up]
Terence Badali: What about her?
Kimball Cho: You left a threatening message on her answering machine recently.
Terence Badali: How do you know it was me?
Grace Van Pelt: 'Cause an innocent person would say "I didn't do it."

"The Mentalist: Paint It Red (#1.13)" (2009)
Rob Wallace: [thinks Jane and Grace are engaged] Ok I'm just going to say it. Are you sure about marrying this guy? I mean, he kind of appears to be a jerk. I mean - no offense.
Grace Van Pelt: Oh no. Yes. I'm not marrying him. That's no. Don't worry about that. Not gonna happen.

Teresa Lisbon: Where is everyone?
Grace Van Pelt: Weird. They all called in to sign out. Jane wasn't feeling well. Rigsby had a hot date. And Cho's got Kings tickets.
Teresa Lisbon: Son of a...
Grace Van Pelt: What?
Teresa Lisbon: Jane doesn't get sick. Rigsby's not on a date because he's in love with you. And the Kings aren't playing tonight.
Grace Van Pelt: You know about that?
Teresa Lisbon: Yeah. They're on an east coast road trip, they're playing the Knicks tomorrow night.
Grace Van Pelt: No, I mean about Rigsby. How do you know about that?
Teresa Lisbon: Everybody knows about that. The Attorney General knows that.

"The Mentalist: Pilot (#1.1)" (2008)
Grace Van Pelt: You poor, sad man. The Kingdom of God is a real place.
Patrick Jane: Okay, later tonight, when Rigsby asks you to come back to his hotel room...
[Rigsby chokes and coughs in surprise]
Patrick Jane: Say yes.
Grace Van Pelt: Excuse me?
Patrick Jane: I know, you were planning on refusing him very curtly. First week on the job, you want to set a tone, no monkey business. But why not? Rigsby's an excellent lover, I'm sure. Tough, but fair. Right?
[Rigsby glares at him]
Patrick Jane: Right.
Grace Van Pelt: The Kingdom of God is a real place, Mr. Jane. And you have an immortal soul.
Patrick Jane: Oh, I do so hope you're wrong.

Grace Van Pelt: Five hundred years in the future, it could be totally normal to communicate with the other side.
Patrick Jane: The other side? Your father's a football coach, yeah?
Grace Van Pelt: How did you know that?
Patrick Jane: It's obvious from your whole demeanor. My point is, didn't dad always say life is like football? When that final whistle blows, the game is over, done. There is no more. There is no other side. This is it. Lobster and bread rolls and nautical kitsch and then, psh. Nothingness.

"The Mentalist: Ladies in Red (#1.4)" (2008)
Patrick Jane: I wanted to win the bet too, but uh... I couldn't. Just because I lost doesn't mean you shouldn't take my advice.
Wayne Rigsby: Yeah I should.
Patrick Jane: I'm serious man. Go for it!
[Jane leaves]
Grace Van Pelt: ...What's he talking about?
Wayne Rigsby: Nothing.

Grace Van Pelt: Adrianna, we can charge you right now with burglary, vandalism, assault with a deadly weapon. That's 10 to 15 right there. Wouldn't you rather talk to us about your situation?
Adrianna Jonovic: From you, I buy cookies. I don't talk about situation.

"The Mentalist: Redacted (#3.20)" (2011)
Grace Van Pelt: [Entering in Lisbon, Jan, and LaRoche] Sorry to interrupt, boss. But I just talked to the girlfriend, Heather Blue, she's frightened. Says someone's prowling around her apartment.
Teresa Lisbon: Let's go see her. I wanna ask her about that Peace Corps thing anyway. Jane, are you com -
[Realizes Jane's gone. Quietly to herself]
Teresa Lisbon: Damn.
J.J. LaRoche: Something wrong?
Teresa Lisbon: Not at all, sir.

Teresa Lisbon: There you are, where you been?
Patrick Jane: Out back checking out escape routes
Teresa Lisbon: You get anything?
Patrick Jane: The killer didn't find what he was looking for
Grace Van Pelt: How do you know?
Patrick Jane: This entire room has been torn apart, you find what you're looking for, you end your search, one side should be untouched
Grace Van Pelt: Unless he found it in the last place he looked
Patrick Jane: The possibility of finding something in the last place you look is extremely improbable
[he walks away]
Teresa Lisbon: Where are you going?
Patrick Jane: As much as I enjoy the surroundings,we do need to solve this case, it is our job am I wrong?

"The Mentalist: Blood Brothers (#1.22)" (2009)
Grace Van Pelt: [Rigsby's soaking and half dressed] What happened to you?
Kimball Cho: Old age.
Wayne Rigsby: Shut up you. What are you doing here?
Grace Van Pelt: Gee, thanks for the welcome.

Wayne Rigsby: Can I ask you something? Would you - have you ever read your coworker's personnel files
Grace Van Pelt: [confused] Uh. No. Why?
Wayne Rigsby: No. Good. Neither did I.

"The Mentalist: Blinking Red Light (#4.7)" (2011)
Teresa Lisbon: Richard Haibach. You're under arrest.
Richard Haibach: For what?
Grace Van Pelt: We'll think of something.

"The Mentalist: Pretty Red Balloon (#4.3)" (2011)
Wayne Rigsby: Hey, you okay?
Grace Van Pelt: Yeah. I feel pretty good actually. I'm starting to enjoy shooting people.
[Van Pelt chuckles]
Grace Van Pelt: Gotcha.

"The Mentalist: Every Rose Has Its Thorn (#3.19)" (2011)
Wayne Rigsby: What if she's not interested in me? There's gonna be a lot of guys there. For this to work, she has to be interested in ME.
Grace Van Pelt: She will; just be yourself.
Kimball Cho: That's a terrible idea
Wayne Rigsby: Maybe I should do an accent or something.
Grace Van Pelt: I don't think you need an accent...
Wayne Rigsby: [in British accent] Hello. Rigsby. Wayne Rigsby from Sussex. Uh, pleasure to meet you... cheerio.
[in normal voice]
Wayne Rigsby: How was that?
Kimball Cho: Yeah, don't do the accent.

"The Mentalist: Strawberries and Cream: Part 2 (#3.24)" (2011)
Grace Van Pelt: I don't understand. Why are you doing this?
Craig O'Laughlin: It's not you. It's me.

"The Mentalist: The Red Box (#2.17)" (2010)
Wayne Rigsby: There's nobody here. We can lock the door. Nobody's looking.
[Van Pelt sighs]
Wayne Rigsby: Come on.
Grace Van Pelt: We're on duty.
Wayne Rigsby: Yeah. I know. Totally wrong.
[Rigsby laughs]
Wayne Rigsby: Come on.

"The Mentalist: Red Menace (#2.4)" (2009)
Grace Van Pelt: Boss, Nina and Lucas Hodge are here to see you.
Teresa Lisbon: She say why?
Patrick Jane: Because I asked them down here. Rigsby, could you bring her through here, please? It'll just take a minute. Thank you.
Teresa Lisbon: [Rigsby leads Felicia into the bullpen] Are you gonna tell me what this about?
Patrick Jane: I'm just closing your case.

"The Mentalist: Bloodhounds (#3.12)" (2011)
Donald Beechum: Valerie was always thinking she saw me being too friendly with our female guests.
Grace Van Pelt: What did she see?
Donald Beechum: Me comforting them. Never discount the power of healing touch.
Kimball Cho: So how often are you healing homeless women around here?
Donald Beechum: Don't make it sound so sordid.
Grace Van Pelt: If there was nothing wrong, your wife would be standing here.

"The Mentalist: So Long, and Thanks for All the Red Snapper (#4.22)" (2012)
Grace Van Pelt: There's something on your...
Wayne Rigsby: It's just vomit.

"The Mentalist: Redemption (#2.1)" (2009)
Teresa Lisbon: What are you doing?... You're leaving?
Patrick Jane: Well, frankly, if I can't use this job to seek some kind of personal revenge, then uh, there's no a whole lot for me here. I think that - I don't make things better. I - I can't bring dead people back to life. What good do we do? We drive around California visiting unhappy people.
Grace Van Pelt: We're fighting evil and injustice.
Patrick Jane: And how's that going? Any progress lately?
Kendall Cho: We put bad guys where they can't hurt people. That's good enough.

"The Mentalist: The Blood on His Hands (#3.3)" (2010)
Grace Van Pelt: [to Rigsby] Ah... nice of you to show up, pokey. Hope she gave you breakfast, Forensics ate all the bagels.

"The Mentalist: Red Bulls (#2.7)" (2009)
[Grace has been shot]
Grace Van Pelt: Wayne?
Wayne Rigsby: What?
Grace Van Pelt: One thing...
[she hits him in the head]
Wayne Rigsby: What was that for?
Grace Van Pelt: Next time, wear your vest.
Wayne Rigsby: Okay.
Grace Van Pelt: I mean it!
Wayne Rigsby: Yeah, I believe you.

"The Mentalist: Red Sky at Night (#3.1)" (2010)
Wayne Rigsby: 12 cents, seriously?
Grace Van Pelt: What? She cleaned me out.
Wayne Rigsby: Yeah, of 12 cents.

"The Mentalist: Jolly Red Elf (#3.10)" (2010)
Patrick Jane: Chance has thrust away a very sordid and vexing problem. But have no fear.
Grace Van Pelt: We don't.
Teresa Lisbon: I do. What's your plan?

"The Mentalist: Carnelian, Inc. (#1.17)" (2009)
Kimball Cho: He's from the A.G.'s office. We're catching a hot one.
Patrick Jane: Hooray. I was about to go mad with boredom.
Grace Van Pelt: Don't say "hooray." Someone's died.
Patrick Jane: Well, if they have, my happiness makes no difference to them.

"The Mentalist: Flame Red (#1.9)" (2008)
Grace Van Pelt: [to Rigsby] It's not that I don't like you. I do. It's just - we work together. And there are rules. And if... we were to get together, one of us would have to leave the unit, and I'm junior agent. So that would be me. And this job is so important to me and...
[Rigsby starts snoring]

"The Mentalist: The Desert Rose (#6.1)" (2013)
Grace Van Pelt: So what's the plan?
Patrick Jane: Well, if anyone tries to kill me, shoot them.

"The Mentalist: Bloodstream (#3.17)" (2011)
Teresa Lisbon: I want you to know that my re-instatement is in no way a reflection of your abilities. You did a great job.
Kimball Cho: I know.
Kimball Cho: Hey guys, come on in.
Wayne Rigsby: [Rigsby and Van Pelt enter] So we have a question.
Teresa Lisbon: If there's a group hug coming, I am so out of here.
Grace Van Pelt: [Van Pelt chuckles] No hugs. We're going out for a drink to celebrate the return of Cho. Want to join us?
Teresa Lisbon: Guys, thank you. I can't I got a lot of paperwork to do, and there's a management meeting. Next time.
Wayne Rigsby: Right.
Grace Van Pelt: Good night.
Wayne Rigsby: Next time. Good night.
Kimball Cho: Night, boss.
Teresa Lisbon: [the team leaves] The price of power.

"The Mentalist: Red John's Footsteps (#1.23)" (2009)
Patrick Jane: Lisbon? Look.
Teresa Lisbon: Oh, damn.
Patrick Jane: Yeah.
Teresa Lisbon: No, it's... it's a coincidence.
Kimball Cho: That's what I said.
Patrick Jane: No. No such thing as a coincidence. Not with him.
Sheriff Hardy: What are you all talking about? Who's "him"?
Grace Van Pelt: Red John. He's a serial killer. This is his style of cutting.
Patrick Jane: Look at the toenails.
Teresa Lisbon: Yeah, I see them.
Patrick Jane: Painted in her own blood, just like my wife. This is Red John, and he wants to make sure I was on this case.

"The Mentalist: The Red Mile (#3.18)" (2011)
Grace Van Pelt: Thousands of people say it's happened to them. They can't *all* be crazy or lying.
Patrick Jane: Mm hmm.
Grace Van Pelt: I'm just saying you should keep an open mind. You can't prove there aren't aliens.
Patrick Jane: That's true.

"The Mentalist: The Redshirt (#4.9)" (2011)
Doc Dugan: Your own funeral, that's when you hear the truth, what people really think of you. Woman worships me. Would you like to find out why?
Grace Van Pelt: No, thanks.
Doc Dugan: You sure?
Grace Van Pelt: Tempting, really, but... I shot and killed my last boyfriend. I'm not ready for a relationship yet.
Doc Dugan: Okay. Rain check.

"The Mentalist: Black Gold and Red Blood (#2.6)" (2009)
Wayne Rigsby: I know we've been cool. It's just... it feels like he knows.
Grace Van Pelt: You're being paranoid.
Wayne Rigsby: Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean Jane doesn't know.

"The Mentalist: Scarlet Ribbons (#4.1)" (2011)
Wayne Rigsby: How you doing? You good?
Grace Van Pelt: Yeah, I'm fine.
Kimball Cho: Two days ago, you shot and killed your fiancée. You can't be fine.

"The Mentalist: The Thin Red Line (#1.8)" (2008)
Patrick Jane: It's nice to be nice. But if you want to get ahead in life, sometimes you have to be a bitch. I know you know how.
Grace Van Pelt: Gee, thanks.
Patrick Jane: It's all about the balance, Grace. Yin, Yang. Nice, bitch. Little bit of bitch inside the nice, a little bit of nice inside the bitch.
Grace Van Pelt: Yeah, I'll work on that.
Patrick Jane: Keep 'em guessin'.

"The Mentalist: Devil's Cherry (#5.2)" (2012)
Grace Van Pelt: Preliminary forensics report. There were no useable prints on the teapot or bowl. Well, except for Jane's prints.
Wayne Rigsby: Smudging finger prints. Drinking evidence. He's like a drunk uncle.

"The Mentalist: Scarlett Fever (#1.15)" (2009)
Grace Van Pelt: Boss?
Teresa Lisbon: Hmm?
Grace Van Pelt: I've been here nearly six months now. Almost half a year.
Teresa Lisbon: What do you want? Half a cake?

"The Mentalist: The Crimson Ticket (#5.1)" (2012)
Teresa Lisbon: Women can strangle people.
Grace Van Pelt: Believe me I know I could.

"The Mentalist: The Red Ponies (#3.5)" (2010)
Grace Van Pelt: Wait. Did you okay this with Lisbon?
Patrick Jane: I certainly did. What kind of question is that, anyway? It's almost like you don't trust me.

"The Mentalist: Pink Chanel Suit (#3.6)" (2010)
Teresa Lisbon: [At the door] Hi. We have delivery from L Courtier. You want to open the door?
Patrick Jane: [In the distance] She's lying!
Grace Van Pelt: [Lisbon and Van Pelt burst in. Van Pelts puts cuffs on Daniella] Abby Fitzwilliams, you're under arrest!
Daniella: I'm not Abby.
Teresa Lisbon: [Entering another room] Put your hands in the air now!
[Realizes it's Jane]
Patrick Jane: Lisbon, Grace, where's your manners? This is Danniella - Abby's best friend. Come in have a seat.

"The Mentalist: Blood in, Blood Out (#2.14)" (2010)
Grace Van Pelt: But he was your friend.
Kimball Cho: He was a gangbanger, Van Pelt. Bangers get shot. All right? He's not the first person I used to know to get shot, he won't be the last.

"The Mentalist: War of the Roses (#4.15)" (2012)
Grace Van Pelt: You know kids used to call me Bracie Gracie because I wore braces until I was 17. What did people call you?
Kimball Cho: [Flat] Cho.

"The Mentalist: Red-Handed (#1.6)" (2008)
Grace Van Pelt: I don't think it's right to bet on such things. That's a human being that just died!
Wayne Rigsby: No, it's okay. We're in Nevada. Here in California, yeah, it'd be wrong.
[crosses over to Nevada side]
Wayne Rigsby: But here, Nevada. It's okay to gamble on body parts.