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Coach Oleski (Character)
from "Malcolm in the Middle" (2000)
Coach Oleski: Malcolm, there you are. You know Ira James, right? All-State fullback, state single-season rushing record... Who'm I kiddin'. He's probably never even talked to you. Ira's graduating this year. He's got interests from six Division 1-A colleges. Full rides. The problem is, each school wants him to write a personal essay on his application.
Coach Oleski: So, Ira's an idiot. I mean, hamster idiot. And that's only if we're talkin' about a really stupid hamster.
Ira: Mom says I have other nice qualities.
Coach Oleski: Since you're the smartest kid in school, I want you to help him write his essays.
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