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Quotes for
Henchman 24 (Character)
from "The Venture Bros." (2003)

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"The Venture Bros.: Hate Floats (#2.2)" (2006)
Henchman 24: We're gonna get our asses kicked. We didn't have a breakfast.

Henchman 21: [Opening his bureau] Gentlemen, choose your weapons.
Henchman 24: Are these them?
Henchman 21: [correcting] Are these 'they'.
Henchman 24: Who talks like that?
The Monarch: Stand aside. I'm in charge here and I will assign the... are these they?
Henchman 21: [Proudly, as the scene reveals the 'weapons' to be collector's toys] Yep. And you gotta admit that it is a sweet collection.
The Monarch: You fucking idiot! You expect us to go in to battle with these? Is it your plan so that they will die laughing?
Dr. Venture: Oh, no, I think you'll have that covered when you storm the room with butterfly costumes.
The Monarch: Oh ha, ha, ha, ha... nice one-sie, dick! Does it have snaps in the back so you can make poopies?
Henchman 24: Oh, snap!
Dr. Venture: For your information, this isn't a one-sie, it is a speed suit!
The Monarch: Or they can think that you're a three year old with prygeria and take pity on us.
Henchman 24: Oh, in your face!

The Monarch: What do you want?
Henchman 21: Boss?
The Monarch: This is the Monarch speaking.
Henchman 21: Holy crud! I got 24 on the other line. I'll put us on three-way, 'cause I have that.
The Monarch: Good! I want him to hear this, too.
Henchman 21: Dude, it's the Monarch.
Henchman 24: Hey, boss! How's prison?
The Monarch: Well, I'm out! No thanks to you *shmucks!* Guess where I am now?
Henchman 21: At a good friend's house?
Henchman 24: [simultaneously] Uh, a Best Western?
The Monarch: I am sitting in the charred remains of my once-mighty flying Cocoon! Anyone... wanna... explain to me why my Cocoon is charred?
Henchman 24: Because you told us to destroy the Cocoon?
The Monarch: And why it is *sideways?*
Henchman 21: We were following orders! You can't yell at us for following orders!
Henchman 24: Or *kill* us for following orders!
The Monarch: [sighs] Never mind. Just... summon the others and get over here.
Henchman 24: Uh, there are no others.
Henchman 21: Yeah, most of them joined up with Monstroso's crew when he went inside. And we kinda lost touch after that.
The Monarch: I'm not gonna lose my temper... All right! Here's what is going to happen - I'm going to take a shower in what is left of my bathroom. When I get out, I expect you to be here... and I expect this Cocoon to be *fully* manned and *fully* operational!
[hangs up]


"The Venture Bros.: Pinstripes and Poltergeists (#4.8)" (2009)
Henchman 21: What's the meaning of life?
Henchman 24: The color twelve.
Henchman 21: Really?
Henchman 24: No, idiot! Ask me something less Hitchhiker's Guide, dork!
Henchman 21: Do we have souls?
Henchman 24: Yeah. Well, not quite souls but, it's a general idea. Everything has a soul.
Henchman 21: Crap. So I guess I should become a vegetarian?
Henchman 24: No. Like everything living has a soul. Even spinach. You can't win.

Henchman 24: You know how people cry about aborting babies because of their "soul"? It turns out you don't get a soul till' you're like one.
Henchman 21: So weird. One? Really?
Henchman 24: Or maybe six months, I forget. Anyway, you're just this crying... pooing... monster blob till you get your soul.

Henchman 21: Dude, I barely believe you're real. I mean, if there were ghosts, they'd be freakin' everywhere!
Henchman 24: Eh, not necessarily. You can only haunt someone you were close to in life.
Henchman 21: And you chose me? Out of everything, you chose me?
Henchman 24: Uh, before you get all teary-eyed, I could only choose between YOU, and a cocoon that is constantly getting blown up.


"The Venture Bros.: Victor. Echo. November. (#2.6)" (2006)
Henchman 24: Oh, shotgun! Called!


"The Venture Bros.: Showdown at Cremation Creek: Part 1 (#2.12)" (2006)
Henchman 21: [Waking up after partying in the Mighty Flying Cocoon] Oh God! I don't ever want to do that again!
Henchman 24: [Feeling the same] God; he's gonna kill us when he gets back.
Henchman 21: Oh, let him kill us. Death would be a sweet release from all of this.
[Stands up]
Henchman 21: Oh, fuck it! You do it! Just make sure when you do it that it isn't loud or near my head.
Brock Samson: [Off scene, to Henchman 24] I got an idea, Chunk!
[Camera pans to Brock and the Ventures in the jail cell]
Brock Samson: You let me out of here and I'll kill ya.
Henchman 21: Oh, my god. What did we do?
Henchman 24: I thought I dreamed that part.


"The Venture Bros.: I Know Why the Caged Bird Kills (#2.10)" (2006)
[Henchman 21 opens the door to the cell where Henchman 24 is being held]
Henchman 24: Ah, don't knock or anything. It's not like I live with eighty guys and no women, so there is no chance I'm masturbating!