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Quotes for
Dr. Claire Allen (Character)
from "Cupid" (1998)

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"Cupid: Pilot (#1.1)" (1998)
Dr. Greely: They found him brawling with a pimp. It seems the fellow was standing on the corner offering to find people dates.
Dr. Claire Allen: The pimp?
Dr. Greely: The patient, the pimp took umbrage.

Dr. Claire Allen: Name?
Trevor Hale: Cupid.
Dr. Claire Allen: I've got all night.
Trevor Hale: Tremendous, it appears I'm free, too. Maybe we should hang the 'Do Not Disturb' sign.

Dr. Claire Allen: [points to self] Doctor.
[points to Trevor]
Dr. Claire Allen: Patient. Are we clear?
Trevor Hale: Yes, indeed, it's one of my favorite games ever. I've got a hernia!

Dr. Claire Allen: So, you said a hundred couples, correct?
Trevor Hale: Correct.
Dr. Claire Allen: How long do you think that'll take you, bow-less?
Trevor Hale: Two weeks, max.
Dr. Claire Allen: Two weeks?
[starts to write]
Trevor Hale: Yep. Eleven days. Ni-nine days. Put-put five, put five.

Dr. Claire Allen: Olympus, tell me about it.
Trevor Hale: Non-stop, clothing optional party. Everyone's beautiful, drinking wine, chasing nymphs. An amazing place, you have no idea.
Dr. Claire Allen: I saw Boogie Nights, okay?

Dr. Claire Allen: Neptune, details.
Trevor Hale: He gives me a team of oxen and a handful of sheep every year for my birthday.
Dr. Claire Allen: Sheep, that's interesting. Not what I meant, though.

Dr. Claire Allen: Oh, and this man, with the Robert Redford walk, maybe he doesn't want kids and she does. Maybe he's unemployed. Maybe he lives with his mother.
Trevor Hale: So?
Dr. Claire Allen: So, that's unacceptable to most women.
Trevor Hale: Maybe he has to take care of his invalid mother, maybe he had to quit his job to conquer Sparta.

Dr. Claire Allen: Fifteen years of training has prepared me to help these people.
Trevor Hale: And being the Roman god of love for three thousand years has prepared me for, what? A deskjob at hallmark?

Dr. Claire Allen: 'Fame'?
Trevor Hale: Mm-hmm.
Dr. Claire Allen: You get cable on Mt. Olympus?
Trevor Hale: Omniscience, baby, look it up.

Trevor Hale: Do you people know nothing about romance?
Dr. Claire Allen: Ah, the chair recognizes Trevor's id.

Dr. Claire Allen: Why don't you meet me at the Clark Street 'L' stop?
Trevor Hale: Good. Listen, after that i want you to take a look at the stain on my ceiling.
Dr. Claire Allen: Trevor...
Trevor Hale: Don't get all sweaty-palmed on me, snacktime, professional curiosity. The shape. I think it's an abstract representation of innocence lost...
Dr. Claire Allen: ...or?
Trevor Hale: A duckie.


"Cupid: Heart of the Matter (#1.8)" (1998)
Dr. Claire Allen: Why am I here?
Trevor Hale: A lot of theories on that. There's the whole Adam and Eve thing... the Big Bang theory. Not sure that puts your mother in the best light, though.

Trevor Hale: Where there's a will...
Dr. Claire Allen: There's someone there to contest it.

Trevor Hale: This thing you're not doing? Looks like writing. Take a little tip from an old writing teacher of mine. Drop the pen and
[makes cupping motion]
Trevor Hale: grab life by the...
Dr. Claire Allen: Trevor! What do you want?
Trevor Hale: A stronger separation between church and state. More anchovy paste in most of your store-bought Caesar dressing.
Dr. Claire Allen: You know, this is not a great time.
Trevor Hale: You know, some people are actually happy to see me when I come by.
Dr. Claire Allen: Really? Are they allowed to vote and drive cars and everything?

Trevor Hale: If you want my opinion...
Dr. Claire Allen: I will seek professional help to find out why.