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Quotes for
Mrs. Bale (Character)
from "As Time Goes By" (1992)

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"As Time Goes By: Wedding Day Nerves (#4.8)" (1995)
Mrs. Bale: Mr Deacon, would you come and have a word with Kong? He's crying in the kitchen.
Alistair: Yes, of course. I'm glad you're not a poet, Lye. They're temperamental souls.


"As Time Goes By: The Bypass (#7.4)" (1998)
Lionel: Would you excuse us, Mrs. Bale?
Mrs. Bale: Yes, of course. It's almost time for the shipping forecast anyway. The last I heard the wind was doing some very peculiar things in the Irish Sea.


"As Time Goes By: Visiting Rocky (#2.3)" (1993)
Mrs. Bale: Lunch will be served in eighteen and a half minutes.


"As Time Goes By: The Country Set (#5.1)" (1996)
Lionel: Mrs Bale.
Mrs. Bale: Yes?
Lionel: This dense fog which is going to engulf the whole of Hampshire, isn't it rather odd to hear that on a shipping forecast?
[Mrs Bale just smiles]
Jean: Mrs Bale!
Mrs. Bale: Well, I thought the situation warranted a little white lie.
Jean: Bless you!
Lionel: Mind you, yesterday you claimed to have the strength of ten because your heart was pure.
Mrs. Bale: I've always found 'pure' to be a very comparative word.


"As Time Goes By: Avoiding the Country Set (#5.4)" (1996)
[last lines]
Mrs. Bale: Tea will be served in eleven minutes. I apologize for the delay, but I was telephoning Lol's mother.
Lionel: Mrs Bale!
Mrs. Bale: Just local gossip.
Lionel: The word is out, isn't it.
Jean: And I don't think the gang are going to be very popular with Lol's big brothers.
Lionel: No, we'd better stay in London for a bit. I think we might have started a range war. Oh, by the way, why did you say I was decorated in Korea? And, and what exactly is a KBM?
Jean: Kicked By Mule.
Lionel: ...Mule! Of course.
Jean: Well, you were!


"As Time Goes By: Problems, Problems (#3.10)" (1994)
Jean: Hello, Mrs. Bale.
Mrs. Bale: Good morning. Visibility is poor but the sea is moderate in the south North Sea and the Dover Strait.
Jean: I didn't know that.


"As Time Goes By: Welcome News (#4.5)" (1995)
Mrs. Bale: Lunch will be served at 1:24.
Rocky: Is that relevant, Mrs Bale?
Mrs. Bale: Unless you all want to go hungry, yes!


"As Time Goes By: Showered with Gifts (#5.7)" (1996)
[first lines]
Mrs. Bale: You have put the eggs on top, haven't you?
Grocer: Course I have, and if you bring any back cracked, it won't be my fault; it'll be that thing.
[nods at motorcycle]
Mrs. Bale: I'll have you know that *that thing* has not had one mechanical failure since 1959.
Grocer: I'm not talking about the condition of the engine; I'm talking about the way you drive it.
Mrs. Bale: *I* have never driven straight over the island of a roundabout.
Grocer: Wasn't me. That was Dolly Parton.
Mrs. Bale: Oh, so she was driving your Skoda that evening.
Grocer: She was on the radio. I got distracted.
Mrs. Bale: Thank goodness she wasn't actually in the car with you. You'd have hit every signpost from here to Winchester.


"As Time Goes By: Alistair's Engagement (#6.5)" (1997)
[first lines]
Mrs. Bale: Now, are you quite certain that you are fit to travel?
Lionel: Fine. Mrs. Bale. Fully recovered.
Jean: Thank you for looking after us.
Mrs. Bale: You were no trouble at all.
Lionel: Good.
Mrs. Bale: I didn't mean you.


"As Time Goes By: The Wedding (#9.3)" (2002)
Rocky: Come on, Mrs Bale, I fancy a tango.
Mrs. Bale: They're not playing a tango.
Rocky: Oh, stop nit-picking!
Lionel: What about you? Do you fancy a shuffle round?
Jean: Only if we smooch.
Lionel: That's taken as read.