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Quotes for
Voodoo Lady (Character)
from The Curse of Monkey Island (1997) (VG)

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Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 5 - Rise of the Pirate God (2009) (VG)
Guybrush Threepwood: Ever since LeChuck got a hold of your diary, he's really had it in for you.
Voodoo Lady: The dread-pirate LeChuck is not one for nuances. You know this, Guybrush.
Guybrush Threepwood: Back on Flotsam, though, he seemed pretty convinced you were evil.
Voodoo Lady: What else happened "back on Flotsam"? Did he not slaughter you and your friend Morgan LeFlay in cold blood? LeChuck is mad, as usual. I do not blame him for his anger towards me, or towards you. It is expected and beyond his control.
Guybrush Threepwood: You're saying LeChuck is just being LeChuck?
Voodoo Lady: Yes.

Voodoo Lady: Go now, find your body. Find a way for your spirit to possess it. But remember, rebinding a soul to a body is not as simple as taking yourself over - you're rebelling against the natural state of things and the universe will push back. Once you have possessed your body, you'll have to find a more permanent way to bind it to your soul. I recommend Mix n' Mojo brand Spirit Gum. It can create a powerful spiritual bond that will bring your restless spirit and body together in harmony. It's also delicious! It comes in lemon, cherry, and mutton flavors.

Voodoo Lady: [Talking through a dead seagull] Hello, Guybrush.
Guybrush Threepwood: [Scared] Ah! You can do that too?
Voodoo Lady: I'm sorry, but I must still conceal my whereabouts and communicate through the vessels of nature's works.
Guybrush Threepwood: You picked a dead seagull?
Voodoo Lady: A perfect place to go unnoticed.
Guybrush Threepwood: I can't help but think the advantages of flight could be more useful.

Guybrush Threepwood: What the heck am I, anyway? I feel one step removed from a zombie.
Voodoo Lady: You are no stranger to the reanimation of corpses. You are now familiar with the form that LeChuck has known so well.
Guybrush Threepwood: So you're saying I'm a zombie.
Voodoo Lady: Defining such states is folly in the realm of Voodoo...
Guybrush Threepwood: [Resolute] I'm a zombie.
Voodoo Lady: If you insist.

Voodoo Lady: [Last lines] So, my child. Have you done as I asked?
Morgan LeFlay: I have.
[She puts the screaming green essence of LeChuck in a bottle down on a yable]
Morgan LeFlay: Now, for your end of the deal.
Voodoo Lady: Yes, your actions have influenced your fate. I will allow your ghostly form to return to the physical realm to carry on as a fearsome pirate hunter.
Morgan LeFlay: Ghost Pirate Hunter, Morgan LeFlay. I think I'm going to enjoy this.
Voodoo Lady: Perhaps. You have chosen your own fate. Now go! There is much work to be done before the tides of destiny shift again...
[laughs ominously]


The Curse of Monkey Island (1997) (VG)
Voodoo Lady: I am one gifted with the Second Sight, adept at manipulating the forces of nature for the benefit of all who enter my door.
Guybrush Threepwood: You're a fashion consultant?
Voodoo Lady: Well... yes, but that's not what I was referring to. I am a Voodoo Priestess.
Guybrush Threepwood: Neat.
Voodoo Lady: You're an "autumn," by the way.

Guybrush Threepwood: You've got to come! You're my only hope!
Voodoo Lady: No, Guybrush. There is another.

Guybrush Threepwood: I want to know more about variable-rate mortgages.
Voodoo Lady: Bad idea. Though attractive to the first-time homeowner, the rate reacts wildly to fluctuations in the market and can work against the buyer over time. You're best off starting with a 20 percent down payment and a variable-rate mortgage, then refinancing at a fixed rate after one or two years, as the market warrants.
Guybrush Threepwood: Could you repeat that?
Voodoo Lady: No.

Guybrush Threepwood: I want to know more about a career in TV and VCR repair.
Voodoo Lady: So you want to make more money?
Guybrush Threepwood: Sure, we all do!
Voodoo Lady: Stick to pirating.


Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 1 - Launch of the Screaming Narwhal (2009) (VG)
Guybrush Threepwood: Tell me more about this locket.
Voodoo Lady: It was given to me by my... friend... Coronado De Cava.
Guybrush Threepwood: Why do you keep putting dramatic pauses around "friend?" Was Coronado-?
Voodoo Lady: Yes, he was my boyfriend.
Guybrush Threepwood: Icky!
Voodoo Lady: We met in the Jerkbait Islands many years ago. I fell in love with his treasure hunting mind and his beautiful eyes. He fell in love with my voodoo charms and my supple...
Guybrush Threepwood: [sticks fingers in ears] La-la-la-la-la-la! Not listening!
Voodoo Lady: [Inaudible until Guybrush pulls his fingers out of his ears] -like a volcano! But after several months of ocean-steaming passion, our love cooled after he became obsessed with the myth of La Esponja Grande. When we parted, he gave me that locket.
Guybrush Threepwood: Sad... and disquietingly graphic.

Guybrush Threepwood: Y'know, you've been helping me out for years, and I still don't know your name!
Voodoo Lady: Names have power, Guybrush Threepwood. Only a fool willingly gives it away.
Guybrush Threepwood: Does MY name have power?
Voodoo Lady: Er, um, sure, why not?


Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 4 - The Trial and Execution of Guybrush Threepwood (2009) (VG)
Voodoo Lady: I met Coronado De Cava.
Voodoo Lady: My beloved! How was he?
Guybrush Threepwood: Mad. Bipolar. Life ruined. Just another pawn sacrificed in your theater of the damned.
Voodoo Lady: I never meant to cause him harm.
Guybrush Threepwood, Voodoo Lady: Sure you didn't. C'mon, admit it. You were manipulating Coronado.
Voodoo Lady: Coronado was never touched by my Voodoo... even though he sometimes begged to be.
Guybrush Threepwood: Uh, I'm not sure we're talking about the same thing anymore, so I'll just shut up.