No Photo Available
Top Links
main detailsbiographyby votesphoto galleryquotes
by yearby typeby ratingsby votesby TV seriesby genreby keyword
Did You Know?
photo galleryquotes

Quotes for
Frederick Crossfield (Character)
from "No 73" (1982)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"No 73: Ping-Pong (#5.19)" (1985)
Frederick Crossfield: How do you feel about a baby?
Ethel Davis: What, now? I mean eh well, it's eh...
Frederick Crossfield: Oh well, no, I didn't mean babies in general, I meant this baby.
Ethel Davis: I didn't know you could get one already made!
Frederick Crossfield: Eh... it's my sister in law's.
Ethel Davis: Oh, Mrs Crossfield?
Frederick Crossfield: Yes, my brother's wife.
Ethel Davis: Oh, I thought you meant the thing with the
[begins humming the Wedding March]
Frederick Crossfield: Oh, no, no, no!
Ethel Davis: No, no no!

Harry Stern: Right! Now then, Crossfield! I'm not gonna mince about the bush any longer, I think we all deserve an explanation.
Frederick Crossfield: What about?
Dawn Lodge: Shut up!
Harry Stern: I'm referring to one Mrs. Crossfield...
Frederick Crossfield: Which one?
Harry Stern: There's more than one?
Frederick Crossfield: Well, there's two Mrs. Crossfields...
Harry Stern: That's it! Right, I dont wanna hear any more. You shouldn't be let loose on the street! Youre a maniac, you are, mister!

Dawn Lodge: Now Ethel, I think it's time we all had a little chat.
Ethel Davis: Oh yeah, what about?
Dawn Lodge: About Mr. Crossfield, his wifes, his 20 children and their rocking horses.
Frederick Crossfield, Ethel Davis: What?

Harry Stern: How can you let that guy so near the baby, he's a monster! It's... I'll tell you what it is , it's bigamy!
Frederick Crossfield: Big o' me? It's huge of me not to have you arrested for frightening the child!

"No 73: Fickle Fete (#5.20)" (1985)
Kim: [leading someone out of the shed] Don't forget the prediction: married by next week! Another satisfied customer. Who's next?
Frederick Crossfield: Frederick Crossfield.
[hands over his ticket]
Kim: Thank you, Mr. Crossfield, I knew it'd be you.
Frederick Crossfield: Ah, you can see into the future.
Kim: Eh well, Ethel told me you'd be coming down this morning.
Frederick Crossfield: I know why you're doing this clairvoyant stuff, Yes, I've heard about crossing the palm with silver.
Kim: Yes, I've heard about that as well.
Frederick Crossfield: Will 10p. be alright?
Kim: Yes, I suppose i got... yes, 10p, here you go
[hands over ten pence and puts on her gypsy voice]
Kim: Now you come with me, and you will be lucky!

Kim: And so that is what I see in the bowl, in the ball.
Frederick Crossfield: Goldfish?
Kim: Gimmie your palm. Oooh now look here, what, I see the travel line, maybe?
Frederick Crossfield: Well, I have been offered a job abroad...
Kim: Yes! look, the travel abroad line...
Frederick Crossfield: Bahrain.
Kim: But you're going whether it rains or not.
Frederick Crossfield: But they said that they would prefer a married man...
Kim: Oh yes, but you're maybe thinking of getting married?
Frederick Crossfield: I'm not married, no.
Kim: But I do see a little marriage maybe?
Frederick Crossfield: Well, I was saying to Ethel only the other day...
Kim: Yes, Ethel! Here, here is Ethel on the marriage line.
Frederick Crossfield: I thought that was a blister I got from washing the car.
Kim: Oh well, that's the washing line, but here on the marriage line, is you and Ethel getting married!

Neil: Ere, mate, have you proposed yet or what?
Neil: I propose to do it here.
Neil: Great, I'll get the vicar.
Frederick Crossfield: Bishop.
Neil: Yeah.
Kim: Don't you think you should choose somewhere a little more intimate?
Frederick Crossfield: But this is the only place with black and white check floors.
Kim: Oh, you think that's going to sway her one way or the other?
Frederick Crossfield: Who?
Kim: Ethel.
Frederick Crossfield: Eh, does she play the game?
Neil: I reckon she knows the score by now, mate!
Frederick Crossfield: But you don't score in chess.
Neil, Kim: Chess?
Frederick Crossfield: Yes, human chess, thats what I'm doing. What were you talking about?
Neil, Kim: Marriage!
Frederick Crossfield: I had no Idea! Congratulations!
Kim: No, not us, You and Ethel!
Frederick Crossfield: Me and Ethel?
Neil: She really fancies you, you know.
Kim: Yeah, she's never looked so well!

"No 73: Hold This (#6.1)" (1986)
Frederick Crossfield: I must admit: the lounge isn't bad. Except for the eh, paper tearing...
Ethel Davis: Well, you're just jealous 'cause yours didn't remotely look like a piglet.
Frederick Crossfield: That's not the point.

Frederick Crossfield: The point is the bank has lent you some money. You should have a proper, professional job done.
Ethel Davis: Oh, you wanna see professional? I'll show you my gentlemen in the kitchen.
Frederick Crossfield: Ah. I'll look forward to it. Aha! there just about to watch a cartoon, aren't they?
Ethel Davis: Oh no, that's an industrial training film.

Frederick Crossfield: [going over Ethel's expenses] What's this, you bought 10 cans of paint on account?
Ethel Davis: On account of what?
Frederick Crossfield: Exactly!
[pauses to look at more receipts]
Frederick Crossfield: 17.95 for a tie?
Ethel Davis: Ah yes, I met this really nice bloke, Simon Fielding, and I gave him a tie for Christmas.
Frederick Crossfield: [jealous] That's ridiculous!
Ethel Davis: I can go out with anyone I want!
Frederick Crossfield: Yeah, it's a ridiculous price for a tie. I could've got one much cheaper than that.