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: Look, if you're not into this, if you've had a change of heart... Caitlin Dowd
: I haven't, I haven't! Alicia Lawson
: Good, because I like you, little that I know you. But I'm not your lesbian test drive. Caitlin Dowd
: OK, time out. Honestly? I have been stressed out of my mind with the usual work stuff, and this blog thing, and us. Alicia Lawson
: Us? If this is stressing you out, then what are we even... Caitlin Dowd
: No, the thing is, I get like this. And I need you to hang with it. I'm not stressing out because I'm gay or I'm straight. I don't really care anymore if I'm gay or I'm straight. I just... I need to be in control of my life and this past week, I haven't been. OK? I really want to kiss you right now.
[points to the pimple on her forehead
] Caitlin Dowd
: Is this zit going to be a problem? Alicia Lawson
: Not if I'm too close to see it.
: [into the phone
] I'm sorry, I just... I wasn't sure. Not about you. Just, all of it. Alicia Lawson
: [into the phone
] Caitlin, I saw the blog. Are you okay? Caitlin Dowd
: Yeah. Just kinda came out of left field... for me... all of this. Alicia Lawson
: Can we get together? Let's meet tonight for a drink. We really need to talk. Caitlin Dowd
: Yeah. Some place dark would be good.
: Why is it so hard for you to be straight with me? Caitlin Dowd
: No pun intended? Alicia Lawson
: No jokes, Caitlin. Caitlin Dowd
: Excuse me, I like joking. It saves the people I care about from hearing what I really think, like, I dunno, say, somebody's trying to bust me for not being straight with them, when meanwhile, she knew she was pregnant way before she let me in on it? Alicia Lawson
: All right! Caitlin Dowd
: I mean come on! Alicia Lawson
: All right, all right! Look. It's perfectly normal for you to do the going-back-and-forth thing. And you throw in that I'm pregnant, and I'd have been shocked if you hadn't. Caitlin Dowd
: Wait. So now you're cool with it? Alicia Lawson
: I don't want to own you. I just want to trust you. No, I'm not cool with it. I'm a little crushed, to tell you the truth. And, it also took me about an hour and a half to figure out what I was going to wear to lunch with you, so...
: Sweetie, I didn't want to tell you until I was a hundred percent sure it was for real this time. I'm pregnant. Caitlin Dowd
: How? Alicia Lawson
: A donor. My ex and I had been trying for a while. And after we split up, I was still in such a place of wanting a child, I tried one last time.
] Alicia Lawson
: Aren't you going to say something? Caitlin Dowd
: Uh... Congratulations?
: Olivia! Caitlin Dowd
: Olivia? Alicia Lawson
: My ex, the one I was trying to get pregnant with. Olivia Case
: You must be Caitlin. I didn't mean for this to be so awkward. Caitlin Dowd
: It wouldn't have been, if we'd known you were coming. Olivia Case
: Alicia told me about the appointment. Alicia Lawson
: I didn't think you wanted to be here. Olivia Case
: Why wouldn't I? It's my baby, too. Dr. Jane
: The baby looks healthy, in case anyone's wondering.
: Look, if someone doesn't want to be on a date with me, then guess what? They don't have to be on a date with me. Caitlin Dowd
: That guy at the club last night, when he asked me if I was with you, I should have said it. I didn't want to say it. He'd just ask me questions. Am I gay? Am I straight? Am I with you? These are things other people know about themselves that I, apparently, don't know about myself. It's really scary to realize you don't know them. I've never even had a really serious, really successful relationship. I don't think I can honestly say I've even had a semi-serious, moderately successful relationship. These are things you should probably know about me before you get in a relationship with me. Alicia Lawson
: Caitlin, we just met a week ago. We haven't even had a complete date yet. Caitlin Dowd
: So, too soon for the R-word then?