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Quotes for
Mentok the Mindtaker (Character)
from "Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law" (2000)

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"Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law: Shoyu Weenie (#1.5)" (2002)
Mentok: To hell with mind-taking, I'm taking up lip reading.

Mentok: [addressing an attractive witness] Listen, I already *know*...
[Mentok's theme music starts]
Mentok: [shouts] Because I know everything! I'm Mentok, the Mi...
[music abruptly runs down]
Mentok: ?that you're not doing anything tonight, but... what are you doing tonight?
Harvey Birdman, Reducto: [shouts] Objection!

"Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law: Trio's Company (#2.2)" (2004)
Harvey Birdman: My client, a private investigator.
Mentok: Colloquially known as...?
Harvey Birdman: Uhhh... a P.I.? Gumshoe?
Inch-High, Private Eye: He wants you to say "dick".
Mentok: Which would make you an...?
Inch-High, Private Eye: [sighs] Inch-high dick.

"Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law: Juror in Court (#4.6)" (2007)
Harvey Birdman: [alone in his kitchen] I have to call this number after five P.M. to see if it is necessary to report for Jury Duty... Who am I talking to?
[Harvey dials the number]
Harvey Birdman: Please say no, please say no...
Mentok the Mindtaker: [answering the phone] If your number is below two thousand three hundred fifty eight...
[Harvey looks at his number: 2359]
Mentok the Mindtaker: You don't have to report tomorrow.
Harvey Birdman: Damn!
Mentok the Mindtaker: I'm not finished.
Harvey Birdman: Oh!
Mentok the Mindtaker: If your number is divisible by fourteen, you don't have to report.
Harvey Birdman: Damn!
Mentok the Mindtaker: If two trains left your number at the same time headed in opposite directions, you don't have to report.
Harvey Birdman: Damn!
Mentok the Mindtaker: If your number is two thousand three hundred fifty nine or above, you don't have to report.
Harvey Birdman: Yes!
Mentok the Mindtaker: Unless it *is* two thousand three hundred and fifty nine, and then you do! WE'LL SEE YOU AT FIVE FORTY-FIVE A.M., SUCKER!

"Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law: SPF (#2.5)" (2004)
Harvey Birdman: The man's good name. When all is said and done, isn't that all he has? My client, Dingaling...
[a pregnant pause]
Mentok: What?... Oh. Oh! you were expecting a joke there. Too easy! Now, if he'd been Peter Peckapickle von Peenie, née Peter Peenie Peckerpickle; Waldo Lang Schnitzeldong; or Sarah Plain-and-Tall - *any* of those - then we got something!