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61* (2001) (TV)
[after a home run
] Roger Maris
: Curveball? Mickey Mantle
: Yeah, but it didn't curve.
: Roger, are we feuding? Roger Maris
: They said so on the TV, it must be true. Mickey Mantle
: Well, fuck you then. Roger Maris
: Up yours.
: I just ain't getting there. I just can't play no more. I'm wore out, done. I'm out of the race. Thought I took pretty good care of myself too. Roger
: You did Mick. Damn straight you did. Mickey
: Well anyway, he's all yours if you want him. You go get that fat fuck.
: [on the phone with his wife
] Yeah, honey, it was my idea. Ah, you know how it is at the hotel, all the reporters and the fans all the time, this is great. Oh it's just me, Roger, and Cerv.
[Notices Roger entering the kitchen, wearing an apron
: Hey, you look kind of sexy in that. No, there ain't no girls here, it's Roger! He wearing a stupid little girlie apron, cooking up some bacon. Rog, say hi to Merlyn. Roger
: Howdy, Merlyn! Mickey
: [notices Bob entering the kitchen
] Oh, here's Bob. Say hi, Bob. Bob
: Uh, hi Bob. Mickey
: See, I'm going to be real domesticated now.
: So Mickey uh... you know, Bob and I, we are trying to keep it quiet here, so uh... we'll have a few beers every now and then, but uh... Mickey
: What, no broads? Roger Maris
: Listen Mick, Cerv and I got this place. It's real nice and quiet. It's in a nice place, neighborhood. Heck, sometimes we cook for ourselves and other times we're sending out. Mickey
: What the hell are you talking about? Roger
: Yeah, well I was just thinking, maybe you'd like to come and live with us. Mickey
: Let me get this straight. I got a big fucking suite at the St. Maritz Hotel, and you want me to move to Queens?
: There ya go Mick. Mickey
: What the hell's that? Bob
: That's Roger's special eggs. Mickey
: It looks disgusting. Roger
: Well you don't have to have any Bob. Bob
: Oh, thank you! Mickey
: I'm sorry Roger, but I'm going to have to pass. Roger
: Mick, I'm telling ya, don't listen to Bob. Last few times I ate these, I hit home runs.
[Mickey tries the eggs
: Sorry Bob, looks like somebody likes 'em. Bob
: You like 'em? Mickey
: No, they're shit, but I'm in a bit of a slump. I'll try anything.
: I did not say the Babe had it easier. Can you believe this shit? Mickey
: You gotta be careful. Roger
: You'd think I was trying to replace Jesus Christ or something. Bob
: Then don't read the Daily News.
: Mick, did you ever stop and think, if you took better care of yourself, you wouldn't be getting hurt all the time. Did you see what you did out there today with only one arm, and tonight you're out screwing around! How can you do that? You're Mickey Mantle for Christ's Sake! Mickey
: What's that supposed to mean huh? What the fuck's that supposed to mean? Roger
: I don't know Mick, maybe you're the one who doesn't want it. Mickey
: You think you know something about me? You don't know shit about me. Roger
: Yeah? Fine. Mickey
: My dad died when he was 39. Hodgkins. My grandfather, my uncle, same thing. None of 'em made it past the age of 45 so I'm gonna live my life the way I want! Why don't you get off my back. Call your wife, go cry to her about it.
: If I don't wanna talk about things, and I don't know what they wanna hear, and I just wanna play ball. Does that make me the bad guy? Mickey
: There is no bad guy, Rodge. Roger
: Well I got about a 1000 more of these that says your wrong. I just don't understand why it's so important to them. Mickey
: Maybe you oughta forget about your mail for awhile. Put this shit away. Roger
: No, I gotta write back to the kids. Believe it or not, there's some real nice one's in there from the kids.
: You would have done it too. Mickey
: Ah, bullshit. It was you Rodge. You did it, you son of a bitch. Nobody can ever take that away from you. No matter what bullshit they try to tell you. That record's yours.
[Roger and Mickey shake hands
: You're a good man, Roger.
: [after Maris hit his 61st home run
] Do you think you earned their respect out there today? Roger Maris
: Milt, I don't think that's something you earn on a ballfield.
: [before game 154, when Roger, breaking down from pressure, wants to sit out the game
] I'm not a sentimental type guy, but... most of us, we bang around the game for a while, then we are forgotten. Ruth, Cobb, Gehrig, DiMaggio, those guys were bigger than the game, and I know that is not what you want. But right now, whether you like it or not, you're bigger than the game. And this is your chance to go out there and show them what you're made of, and that you owe to yourself. I'll tell you what, why don't you start the game, and at any moment you want to get out, you give me a look, and I'll take you out. Roger Maris
: Ok... sounds fair.
: [Roger's wife and daughter come to opening day to see him receive his MVP award from last season
] Kids up to see the pop get his big award? Roger Maris
: Yeah just Pat and Suzan. The other ones are too little, they're back in Missouri Mickey Mantle
: Uh Huh. Roger Maris
: They came up for opening day and then back tomorrow. Is Merlyn here? Mickey Mantle
: Nah, she's back in Dallas with the boys. She don't like it too much up here. Artie Green
: Who doesn't like it up here? Mickey Mantle
: [Jokingly hitting Artie in the groin with his bat
] Your wife, Artie. She likes it down there, you know what I mean?
: [after reading a news story of him signing an X on a kid's ball
] ... So the guy tells me "Hey, Rog, would you sign an X for my kid?" I sign X and the son of a bitch takes off! I was going to give him a real autograph, I was just kidding around! We win the most important game of the season and this is the horseshit they write about? Mickey Mantle
: [Mickey is eating eggs at the coffee table. Bob, his right knee wrapped up, rests it next to Mickey's plate
] What the hell are you doing? Bob
: Sorry, Mick. You're not the only one with a bum knee. Mickey Mantle
: I don't know what smells worse, your foot or these eggs. Roger Maris
: This is horseshit. Horseshit. I never make a kid cry. Mickey Mantle
: For a guy that hates the press, you sure do read alot of it. Roger Maris
: Well, if they want to talk about what happens on the field, I say that's fair game. But this, this is cheap shot bullshit! Mickey Mantle
: Hey, cheap shots, man, that's how it is. In '53 I tried to volunteer for the Army, but got rejected on account of my knees. The papers called me a draft dodger. Don't matter to them what the truth is, and I still get booed for that shit. Roger Maris
: So what do you do? You just get used to it? Mickey Mantle
: No, but you got to.
[Bob reaches for his foot with nail clippers
] Mickey Mantle
: Now what are you doing? Bob
: This hangnail's killing me. Mickey Mantle
: Take it to the bedroom, man. That's disgusting! Roger Maris
: [Reading the paper
] "Mean-Spirited Roger..." Bob
: You know, I'm not even good enough for people to write about.
[Roger puts down the paper in exasperation
: Why are you reading this stuff, Roger? It's not helping you. Listen, whether you guys break this record or not, it's going to mean nothing unless we get back to the World Series. They may have to cut my knee at the end of the season. I'm going to need that $8,000. Roger Maris
: Yeah, you're right, Bob. Sorry. Bob
: [Roger leaves. Bob cuts his nail but drops it into Mickey's eggs
] Ohh... Mickey Mantle
: [Groans and puts down his fork
] Now, look what you've done! Bob
: Probably would make it taste better.