Larry the Cucumber
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Quotes for
Larry the Cucumber (Character)
from "VeggieTales" (1993)

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Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie (2002)
Larry: [looking through telescope] Thar she blows!
Mr. Lunt: Where?
Larry: Right there! Over by the barbecue!
Mr. Lunt: [picks up ping-pong ball] Got it!

Jonah: I'm afraid the only thing left is to be thrown into the sea.
Larry: Oh, you don't have to do that! We've got a plank! You can just walk off!
Jonah: Yes, thank you. You're too kind.

Pirate Pa: Bring out the cannon!
Mr. Lunt: We ain't got no ammo!
[Larry spots garden items]
Larry: Oh, yes, we do!

Mr. Nezzer: Are you guys still doing that "pirate" thing?
Mr. Lunt: Argh! Watch your tongue, matey! Or we'll... what'll we do?
Larry: Nothing. We're the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything.
Mr. Lunt: Oh. Argh! You got off easy today!

Mr. Lunt: Remember that time we did that one thing with that one guy?
Pa Grape: Oh, do I ever.
Larry: I remember it like it was yesterday.

Mr. Lunt: You are a cheating buccaneer!
Larry: How am I supposed to cheat at Go Fish?
Mr. Lunt: I don't know.

Pa Grape: What you need is a little compassion.
Larry: And maybe some scampi.

[during the closing credits song, Larry threatens to leave early]
Larry: I'm gonna go home and take a nap!
Pa Grape: Come on, we have contractual obligations to finish the song.
Mr. Lunt: They paid for a full 79 minutes of entertainment, pal! Get back in the booth!
Larry: Wake me up for the prequel!
[Larry leaves]
Pa Grape: Oh, come on! We were just starting to have fun!
Pa Grape: Oh man, I need a tums.
[Pa leaves]
Mr. Lunt: What? What, are we done? You mean that's it? Zim-bom-a-loo-bop-a-lop-bam-bing?... Hey, hey, ho ho ho, Hey hey, ho ho ho, hey hey... If you need me, I'll be on the porch.

[one of the outtakes, as Dad dodges obstacles while driving]
Dad: Tree!... Cabin!... Larry-Boy!
[the van suddenly runs into a clothes line on which Larry-Boy is hanging]
Larry: Hi, guys! What's up?

Pirate Pa, Larry, Mr. Lunt: ["The Credits Song"] This is the song that runs under the credits. These are the credits, so this is where it goes. Has nothing to do with the movie so we'll say "Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!..."

City Official, Crazy Jopponian: [the Pirates and Jonah are on trial and the city official addresses the crowd] People of Nineveh! These four men and that small...
City Official, Crazy Jopponian: whatever it is!
Khalil: I am a caterpiller! Well that is only half true.
City Official, Crazy Jopponian: ...have been found guilty of high thievery against the royal city of Nineveh. For their punishment:
City Official, Crazy Jopponian: The Slap of No Return!
Larry: [the entire audience of Ninevites are all laughing] What's so funny?

VeggieTales: Where's God When I'm S-Scared? (1993) (V)
Junior Asparagus: Aaah! Who are you?
Bob: I'm Bob. I'm a tomato and I'm here to help you.
Junior Asparagus: There's something in my toy chest! It's a big scary lizard! It's a... baby pickle.
Bob: That's a cucunber
Larry: Where is everybody?
Bob: Over here Larry! We couldn't notis that you were a little bit scared.
Larry: Yeah! Um, fear not, for behold I bring you tidings of great joy which shall be to all people, for unto you -
Bob: Wrong story Larry.
Larry: Oh, sorry.

Larry: Compared to God, the Slime Monster is like a teeny little cornflake!
Junior Asparagus: Yeah, but the Slime Monster can squirt slime out of his ears!

Larry: So, you guys are wise men. That's pretty cool, have you, like, have you always been wise, or did you have to go to school for that? Were you serious about that cheese-ball thing? Hey, I can see my house from here!
Scallion #1: Daniel, because you violated Section 4219 2R9-4000 6 dot 1 dash 7, B, of the code of Babylon, forbidding prayer to anyone but King Darius- you are hereby sentenced to be consumed by the lions. Goodbye!
Larry: Hey, didn't get I get a phone call!

Larry: Oh, it's not so scary down here! A little musty, not so scary!

Larry: See you guys later! Thanks for the pizza!

Larry: Ooh, I remember one time I thought there were monsters in MY closet.
Bob: Really? What happened, Larry?
Larry: Well, it turned out they weren't really monsters at all, just my fluffy bunny slippers. And, they're not so scary. Just, kind of, squishy.

Larry: [singing] Everybody's got a water buffalo / Yours is fast but mine is slow / Oh, where'd we get them? I don't know / But everybody's got a water buffalo-ooooooooo/ I took my buffalo to the store / Got his head stuck in the door / Spilled some lima beans on the floor / Oh everybody's got a...
Archibald Asparagus: Stop it, stop, stop right this instant! What do you think you're doing? You can't say everyone's got a water buffalo when everyone does not have a water buffalo! We're going to get nasty letters saying, "Where's my water buffalo? Why don't I have a water buffalo?" And are you prepared to deal with that? I don't think so! Just stop being so silly!
Larry: [singing] Everybody's got a baby kangaroo / Yours is pink but mine is blue...
Archibald Asparagus: Ahhhhhhhhhhh!
[Tackles Larry]

VeggieTales: Tomato Sawyer & Huckleberry Larry's Big River Rescue (2008) (V)
Huckleberry Larry: Beware the babies!

Huckleberry Larry: If we see someone who needs help, and we can help 'em, I think that's what God wants us to do.
Tomato Sawyer: You were right all along. We do need to help others, even when it's not easy.

Tomato Sawyer: Who's that guy?
Huckleberry Larry: I think it was Colonel Sanders.

[last lines]
Bob the Tomato: Remember, kids, God made you special.
Larry the Cucumber: And He loves you very much!
Bob the Tomato: You shouldn't talk with your mouth full.
All: Goodbye!

[first lines]
Bob the Tomato: Okay, Larry, it's time for the theme song.
Larry the Cucumber: Uh, y-yeah, Bob. What do I do?
Bob the Tomato: Hm, let's see. I know! You play the guitar.
Larry the Cucumber: Bob, I don't have any hands.

Huckleberry Larry: I just wanna help little Jimmy find his mama.
Tomato Sawyer: I've got news for you. I didn't hurt little Jimmy. I'm not the one who sent him up the river away from his mama. I didn't hurt him, so I shouldn't have to help him.
Huckleberry Larry: Sometimes, not helping is the same as hurting.
Tomato Sawyer: What? That makes no sense.
Huckleberry Larry: If we see someone who needs help, and we can help them, I think that's what God wants us to do.

VeggieTales: The Ultimate Silly Song Countdown (2001) (V)
Pa Grape: Ahoy there mateys! Welcome aboard the ship of the Pirates who Don't Do Anything.
Larry the Cucumber: Nothing.
Mr. Lunt: Zilch.
Larry the Cucumber: Nada.

Pa Grape: Not so fast you lazies! Today we're doing a little something.
Larry the Cucumber: Not again!
Mr. Lunt: We did something yesterday!
Pa Grape: All you did was order Chinese.
Mr. Lunt: Hey! It's hard to say 'moo goo gai pan'. Whoops! I did it again. I'm beat.

Mr. Lunt: Hey... I smell something fishy.
Pa Grape: Uh, that's your friend.
[Larry the Cucumber offers some Chinese food]
Larry the Cucumber: Kung pao squid?
Mr. Lunt: Uh... no.

The Astonishing Contraption of Silliness: Number four. The Song of the Water Buffalo Who Don't Love Cebu With Yodeling Lips.
Pa Grape: Wait a minute! Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. It appears we're experiencing technical difficulties once again.
Pa Grape: [to Larry and Mr. Lunt] Buy me some time.
Mr. Lunt: Huh?
Larry the Cucumber: What are we supposed to do?
Pa Grape: I don't know. Think of something!
Pa Grape: [Pa goes to work on the machine] Come up with another one of those Silly Songs you're so famous for!
Larry the Cucumber: But... I didn't prepare anything.
Pa Grape: Oh, for Pete's sake.
Pa Grape: [Pa hands Larry a menu of Chinese takeout] Here. Use this!

VeggieTales: Madame Blueberry (1998) (V)
Archibald: [after Larry is introduced in full Davy-Crockett-like costume and props for his song] Silly Songs has been cancelled until further notice.
[walks off-stage]
Larry the Cucumber: Oh, yeah?
Larry the Cucumber: Well, how am I supposed to get outta this bear trap?
Archibald: Oh, you'll think of something.

Bob the Tomato: Larry, how much stuff do you need to make you happy?
Larry the Cucumber: [Thoughtfully.] I don't know. How much stuff is there?

[Bob and Larry are crying]
Bob the Tomato: Oh, that was beautiful!
Larry the Cucumber: Hold me Bob!
Bob the Tomato: I would if I could, man!
Jean Claude: Pull yourselves together!
Phillipe: Yes, you have a show to wrap up!
Bob the Tomato: Oh, you're right. I'm sorry, where were we?
Larry the Cucumber: [sobs] Madame Blueberry!
[Bob and Larry crying]
Jean Claude: All right! That does it! Cue the music!
Phillipe: Unless, of course, you have any objections!

VeggieTales: Rack, Shack & Benny (1995) (V)
[from down in the sink]
Larry the Cucumber: So what we have learned applies to our lives today, /and God has a lot to say / in his book.
Bob the Tomato: Larry, you know I feel about that song.
Larry the Cucumber: [singing] Yes, we know that God's word is for everyone. / And now that our song is done, /
[Bob turns on the faucet above Larry]
Larry the Cucumber: we'll take a... *hey*, that's cold!

Bob the Tomato: It's time to talk about what we've learned today, right, Larry?
Larry the Cucumber: I'm wet.
Bob the Tomato: Right.

VeggieTales: King George and the Ducky (2000) (V)
Larry the Cucumber: Don't question the king's grammar!

Pa Grape: It's a flannelgraph. To illustrate.
Larry the Cucumber, Bob the Tomato: Ooh! Flannelgraph!

VeggieTales: Lord of the Beans (2005) (V)
Leg-O-Lamb: [ripping the fake ears off Ear-O-Corn, dressed as Elvis] I KNEW it!
Larry the Cucumber - Ear-O-Corn: What?
Leg-O-Lamb: You should be ashamed of yourself! You're no Elf! You're an Elvish impersonator! You sicken me, deceitful one.
Larry the Cucumber - Ear-O-Corn: Oh right! Like YOU'RE a real elf! Give the gourd a bow and arrow and he's a REAL Elf!

Larry the Cucumber - Ear-O-Corn: We'll create a distraction! Does anyone have a banjo and an inflatable turkey?

Larry-Boy! And the Fib from Outer Space! (1997) (V)
Larry: We need to hurry this along. I have a meeting with the action figure people in ten minutes.
Bob: Action figure?
Larry: Yes, Bob. Larry-Boy mania is sweeping the nation. If you're not on board, you're gonna miss the train.
Bob: I, ah, I had no idea!
Larry: Now you do.

Larry-Boy and the Rumor Weed (1999) (V)
Larry the Cucumber: I - I'm flying under the ground!
Archibald: Well, actually, you're boring.
Larry the Cucumber: Gee, Alfred, I know I'm not the wittiest of cucumbers, but I...
Archibald: No, no, no, not that kind of boring. It's like drilling. It's a boring machine.

"VeggieTales: The Toy That Saved Christmas (#1.18)" (1996)
Larry the Cucumber: [Bob, Larry, and Junior Asparagus have just crashed their sled] Bob! Are you okay?
Bob the Tomato: [Bob, upside down in the snow] Mousetrap.
Larry the Cucumber: What?
Bob the Tomato: [Bob, still upside down in the snow] I wanted to play 'Mousetrap.' You roll your dice, you move your mice. Nobody gets hurt.

"The Simpsons: The Greatest Story Ever D'ohed (#21.16)" (2010)
Cucumber: You have been chosen, Homer.
Homer Simpson: Chosen for what, oh mighty Gerkin?