Shep Ramsey
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Quotes for
Shep Ramsey (Character)
from Suburban Commando (1991)

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Suburban Commando (1991)
Shep Ramsey: I'm here to rent the apartment.

Hutch: [in a kids voice] You're a dead man, Ramsey.
Shep Ramsey: No wonder you guys don't talk.

Deak: Do you have any idea what we are gonna do to you, if we find one itty, bitty scratch on 'em?
Shep Ramsey: Let me guess. You're gonna pound my face. Break every bone in my body. Then you're gonna drag me across a gravel road and feed my remains to a warthog. Is that about right?
Deak: What are you nuts? This is the '90s. We're gonna sue you.

Shep Ramsey: Earthlings... I *hate* earthlings...

Shep Ramsey: What am I gonna do for six weeks?
Commander: Why don't you try... relaxing?
[shep makes a face]
Commander: Disappear, Shep. Blend in. Get to know the locals.
Shep Ramsey: But I...
Commander: [interrupting firmly] consider it an order... Ramsey.
Shep Ramsey: [commander's face disappears; to himself] Six weeks. What am I gonna do for six weeks...?

Shep Ramsey: They're here.
Charlie Wilcox: Who's here?
Shep Ramsey: A couple of leeches that make their living of the blood of others.
Charlie Wilcox: Investment bankers?
Shep Ramsey: Bounty hunters!
Charlie Wilcox: Bounty hunters? You mean from up there?

[Shep catches a little girl who went airborne when he tried to get her cat out of a tree]
Little Girl: Whoa! Thanks.
Shep Ramsey: Get a goldfish.

Shep Ramsey: [awoken by the sounds of people chattering all over] Quiet!
[chattering stops, with the exception of a cricket chirping]
Shep Ramsey: [to the cricket] Hey!
[chirping stops]

Shep Ramsey: Where's my N-210 Algorizer?
Margie Tanen: [points a gun at Shep] All right, drop him, Kong.
Charlie Wilcox: It's OK, Margie, this is a friend of mine.
Margie Tanen: Well, then, take it outside. You know, maintenance has enough work to do without your blood on the carpet.

Shep Ramsey: [sees little girl crying] What?
Little Girl: [crying] My cat. My cat!
[Shep sees a cat in the nearby tree, bends branch downward]
Little Girl: That's not my cat!
Shep Ramsey: Oh.
[releases branch, sending the cat flying]
Shep Ramsey: I hate suburbia.

Shep Ramsey: Anti-freeze!