Joy Stark
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Quotes for
Joy Stark (Character)
from "'Til Death" (2006)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"'Til Death: Come Out and Play (#2.3)" (2007)
[first lines]
Eddie Stark: Ah, can't wait.
Dad: Oh, you folks are gonna have to move, this our table.
Joy Stark: Huh? How's that?
Dad: We put the ketchups there.
Joy Stark: Oh, you think you can hold a table with condiments.
[laughs]
Joy Stark: That is just adorable!

[last lines]
Eddie Stark: I made it! It went in! It went in, it went in!
Joy Stark: Sure it did, babe.
Eddie Stark: It went in.


"'Til Death: Webby's Not Happy (#1.21)" (2007)
[first lines]
Eddie Stark: Come on Joy, hurry up, he's gonna be here any minute!
Joy Stark: Eddie, Webby comes back to Philly every year and each time you see him you act like you're about to lose your virginity.
Eddie Stark: Joy, let me tell you, Webby is a lot more fun than something that happened in theback of my uncle's van. H-he he's untamed, he's unwed, he has no responsabilities, uh, do you know that he's a ski instructor every winter in Aspen and in the summer he can pick what island he wants to bartend on, huh?
Joy Stark: I know, he's the James Bond of unemployed middle-aged men.

[last lines]
Joy Stark: Yeah, about that, um, you know the thing with, huh, Denise and Webby probably isn't... gonna work out. She told me, in the bathroom that she's gonna... break up with him.
Eddie Stark: What? W-Why would anybody break up with Webby?
Joy Stark: Well it turns out that Webby... is... too much man for one woman! Webby... belongs to the world.
Eddie Stark: Oh, you learned a little lesson, huh? Trying to fix Webby up? You wanted to tame Webby but you can't!
Joy Stark: OK sweetie.
Eddie Stark: Yeah.
Joy Stark: Yeah.
Eddie Stark: Can't tame Webby! Same way you can't grab hold of the wind!
Joy Stark: No you cannot grab the wind!
Eddie Stark: That's right! You're damn right, it can't be done!
Joy Stark: Cannot be done!
Eddie Stark: He is magnificient!


"'Til Death: That's Ridiculous (#1.20)" (2007)
[first lines]
Joy Stark: Okay, remember that the garbage goes out on Tuesday and if you see a man in the bushes it's probably just the gardener so please don't call 911... again. And I put backup toilet paper in all the bathrooms because I won't be here to rescue you when you start yelling Joy! TP! Now!
Eddie Stark: I'm just trying to save us all the embarassment of me shuffling across the hall to the linen closet.

[last lines]
Eddie Stark: Dear God, it's me, Edward. I know we haven't spoken in a while and... I just wanna say that I'm sorry for those terrible names I called you when I was passing my kidney stone. In retrospect that mut've been very hurtful. I'm also sorry for the... bad things I... said to my wife, but you didn't have to take both her and TV from me. To take one or the other would've been fair, but both, quite frankly is... showboating.
Joy Stark: [entering] Eddie I'm home!
Eddie Stark: Ah! Oh! Did I miss you! OK, come here.
[kisses Joy multiple times]
Eddie Stark: Did you miss me?
Joy Stark: [forced smile] Yeah
Commercial Announcer: Bienvenidos a Telemundo!
Eddie Stark: Gracias, mi Dios!


"'Til Death: Summer of Love (#1.22)" (2007)
[last lines]
Joy Stark: Come on, pour me some sangria and teach me the words to Shalamar.
Eddie Stark: Ah! Now you're talkin'.
[starts singing]
Eddie Stark: It was a sad and lonely sunset, a whisper of a star! There was a fiery woman named Joy...
Jeff Woodcock: Jeff!
Eddie Stark: [singing] And a horse called Shalamar!
Joy Stark: [singing] Shalamar!
Eddie Stark: [singing] Ride, little pony, ride!
Joy Stark: [singing] Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah Shalamar!
Eddie Stark: [singing] Yeah, that little pony would ride!
Joy Stark: [singing] Ooh!
Eddie Stark: [singing] It's a little pony from heaven!


"'Til Death: Four Neighbors and a Funeral (#2.2)" (2007)
[first lines]
Joy Stark: Thank you. Eddie, I got these gorgeous flowers and I've no idea who they're from, there's no card.
Eddie Stark: Oh! Actually they're from me.
[Joy laughs]
Eddie Stark: No, seriously, they're from me.


"'Til Death: The Coffee Maker (#1.19)" (2007)
[first lines]
Jeff Woodcock: So, huh, you guys just invited us over for brunch? It's strangely friendly of you.
Joy Stark: We just wanted to thank you for that awesome cappuccino maker that you got us.
Jeff Woodcock: [surprised] Cappuccino maker? Well right, yeah, you're, huh, you're
[confused glance at Steph]
Jeff Woodcock: welcome.
Joy Stark: So great! Now our kitchen looks juts like the Williams-Sonoma catalog, except for, you know, us.


"'Til Death: Clay Date (#1.17)" (2007)
[first lines]
Joy Stark: Phone!
Eddie Stark: We're not here! Don't answer that!
Joy Stark: What if it's an emergency?
Eddie Stark: Who would call us in an emergency? You're panicky and I'm too big to fit in small spaces!


"'Til Death: The Italian Affair (#1.16)" (2007)
[first lines]
Joy Stark: Hey!
[removes Eddie's headphones]
Joy Stark: Hellooo!
Eddie Stark: Hey!
Joy Stark: It's supposed to be spring cleaning.
Eddie Stark: I found my old headphones, yeah and the left side still works except you have to hold the cord like this or you get a pretty good shock.


"'Til Death: Performance Anxiety (#2.1)" (2007)
[first lines]
Mindy: Hey, I'm heading into the kitchen, you want me to grab that?
Joy Stark: No, I'm holding on to the wine until they see that I brought it.


"'Til Death: The Tale of the Tape (#2.4)" (2007)
[first lines]
Eddie Stark: 'Morning!
Joy Stark: Good morning to you.
Eddie Stark: Watcha got going on there?
Joy Stark: I'm paying our credit card bill.
Eddie Stark: Well why you sending them 500 dollars?
Joy Stark: Because we owe them 1200.


"'Til Death: The Bachelor Party (#1.15)" (2007)
[first lines]
Joy Stark: Ow! What are you doing?
Eddie Stark: What do you mean what am I doing? I'm playing footsie!
Joy Stark: OK, footsie would imply something cute and playful... you're sawing through my Achilles tendon with your big toenail!


"'Til Death: I Heart Woodcocks (#1.18)" (2007)
[first lines]
Jeff Woodcock: So, huh, you guys just invited us over for brunch? It's strangely friendly of you.
Joy Stark: We just wanted to thank you for that awesome cappuccino maker that you got us.
Jeff Woodcock: [surprised] Cappuccino maker? Well right, yeah, you're, huh, you're
[confused glance at Steph]
Jeff Woodcock: welcome.
Joy Stark: So great! Now our kitchen looks juts like the Williams-Sonoma catalog, except for, you know, us.