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Quotes for
Woody Deane (Character)
from It's a Boy Girl Thing (2006)

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It's a Boy Girl Thing (2006)
Woody: [Waking up in Nell's body] Tits? Oh my God! I have tits! I have TWO tits!

Woody: [inhabited by Nell, looking at a boy standing next to him at the mens' urinals] Nice penis.

Woody: [inhabited by Nell] So we've got the wrong lives, but sometimes you just got to get on with life. Let things fall into place.

Woody: [inhabited by Nell, seeing how Woody has dressed her body for school] You look like a common prostitute.
Nell Bedworth: [Woody in Nell's body] Damn... I was going for high class hooker.

Woody: [voiceover: Woody in Nell's body, putting on a bra] Ah, it's tough enough getting these damn things off! How the hell does anyone know how to get these freaking things on?

Woody: [inhabited by Nell] What exactly is it that people like me don't get?
Nell Bedworth: [inhabited by Woody] People like ME!
Woody: Then educate me, PLEASE.
Nell Bedworth: Okay. We like to play ball. Maybe we're even pretty good at it. So... maybe we get accepted at some second-rate, shit-kicker college, or maybe we go work for our dad at the spatula store. Who knows. But what we don't get is a great job, a big apartment in the city, and a Yale education.

Nell Bedworth: [inhabited by Woody] I'm a loser, I'm trouble and I'm stupid. It's basic genetics. Can't help it.
Woody: [inhabited by Nell] Funny... never took you for a quitter.

Woody: That no racket! That's Mystikal!

Woody: Nice grab, Horse. How's it hangin'?
Horse: To the floor, my friend. Now what's say we shift this baby into warp drive, huh? Wancha to feel the wind blowin' through the hair in your fine, muscular ass.

Nell Bedworth: But chew on this: While archetypal outsiders such as myself rarely fit comfortably into high school environments, THIS is as good as your life will get: The big football star and his vacuous cheerleader girlfriend.
Breanna: HEAD cheerleader.
Nell Bedworth: Hm. Because, let's face it, the old grey matter ain't exactly top-range, now is it, Woodster. So you'll end up with a job in Spachlor World, with your Dad, and probably marry Breanna here, but soon you start drinking to numb this aching feeling you have inside. And, you fast-forward a few years, and you're a drunk, fat, depressed guy at a bar talking about the good old days, while your little wife, whose looks and stuff have gone to doodoo, is propping up her own self-esteam by indulging in squalid sexual encounters with your friends behind your back.
Woody: What friends?
Nell Bedworth: I'm guessing most of 'em. Have a good day.

Nell Bedworth: [inhabited by Woody] What're you wearing?
Woody: [inhabited by Nell] Chinos and an Oxford cotton button down I found it in the back of your closet.
Nell Bedworth: Which is exactly where it's meant to stay until another one of my relatives croaks.
Woody: Nonsense. You can't beat a classic look.

Mr. Zbornak: Woody, you... you crying?
Woody: [inhabited by Nell] Yeah.
Mr. Zbornak: What's... what's wrong?
Woody: I'm sorry. I just found out I lost my virginity in a trailer park.

Woody: Think about it, Harry. Are you willing to trade the love of a good woman for the cheap thrill of a tawdry one-night stand?
[Horse laughs]

Woody: [inhabited by Nell] Can we just keep playing football, please?
Nell Bedworth: [inhabited by Woody] Sure, as long as you keep my dick out of your butt.

Woody: Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art more lovely and... temperate. Rough winds... blah blah blah... There's something in there I can't remember. And, uh... yadda yadda yadda. I'm sorry, I... I'm no Shakespeare. My guess, Romeo wasn't much of a quarterback either, right?

Nell Bedworth: Come here, dumb jock.
Woody: Try and stop me, pencil-neck.