Jack McCallister
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Quotes for
Jack McCallister (Character)
from Fun with Dick and Jane (2005)

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Fun with Dick and Jane (2005)
Jack McCallister: Did I get it?
Jack's Assistant: [Shoots his gun] Now you did.

Jack McCallister: Dick Harper, Dick Harper, Dick Harper playing the harp. Harpo Marx playing the Jews harp.*DH*, DH! You're my Designated Hitter!

Dick Harper: [holding McCallister at gunpoint] I've been terminated, bankrupted, deported and blackmailed because of you, and I'm not leaving here without your money.
Jack McCallister: What are you gonna do, Dick? Shoot me if I don't approve that form?
Dick Harper: Write me a check.
Jack McCallister: You are kidding me.
Jane Harper: Dick, it's not going to do us any good. He's just going to cancel it the minute we walk out of here.
Dick Harper: I don't care... I don't care. I'm not walking out of this bank empty-handed.
Jack McCallister: ...Alright. Alright, Dick, I'm gonna write you a check. I'm gonna need my hand back though.
Dick Harper: Gladly.
[releases grip]
Jack McCallister: Alright, yes sir, I'm gonna write you that check, and what's more I'm not gonna cancel it as soon as I leave the bank because I think it takes alotta cojones to do what you two have done here today, and I admire that. So, here you go. Just a little something to show you what I think you're worth.
[hands him a check for $100]
Jack McCallister: Y'all take care now.