Lindsay Lohan
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Quotes for
Lindsay Lohan (Character)
from Scary Movie 5 (2013)

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"Robot Chicken: Celebrity Rocket (#2.4)" (2006)
Lindsay Lohan: I'm Lindsay Lohan... Lo-hon... Lowon... I'm Lois Lane!

Hilary Duff: [in a Parody of Highlander] He's dead, as are the Olsen Twins, I even decapitated my sister Haylie, Though she didn't have any powers now it was really awkward to explain to Mom and Dad, Only you and I remain.
Lindsay Lohan: You Bitch!
Hilary Duff: Watch it Lohan, we can't fight on Holy ground.
[They're currently at The Gap]

Sean Connery: [During Lindsay's training exercises] You must harness your gifts for the gathering.
Lindsay Lohan: What gathering? You're gathering.

Lindsay Lohan: I lost 150 pounds, and nobody takes me seriously! Maybe I'll adopt a brown kid.

Hilary Duff: So now it ends. The power is mine, Lohan!
Lindsay Lohan: Not if I can help it!
[Lohan and Duff engage in a sword fight]
Hilary Duff: Slut!
Lindsay Lohan: Whore!
Hilary Duff: White trash!
Lindsay Lohan: Agent Cody skank!
Hilary Duff: Aaron Carter loves *me*!
Lindsay Lohan: Aaron said your toes were gross!
Hilary Duff: Your album sucks!
Lindsay Lohan: *MY* album sucks!

Lindsay Lohan: When I grow up, I gonna get an Oscar.
Sean Connery: If by Oscar you mean get your head cut off, you're on your way if you don't train harder.
Lindsay Lohan: Uh, that totally isn't what I meant, stupid! You smell like whiskey, and I wanna go shopping.
Sean Connery: And they complained when I smacked by wife.

Sean Connery: Never lose your temper!
Lindsay Lohan: Never lose my "tempa"?
Sean Connery: Temper!
Lindsay Lohan: Ugh, i hate your slurring, you drunk!
Sean Connery: I'm not drunk! I'm Scottish!
Lindsay Lohan: [sarcastic] Ooh, sure. And I was in the hospital for exhaustion.


Scary Movie 5 (2013)
[to Dom after hitting Charlie]
Lindsay Lohan: You were driving.

Lindsay Lohan: I don't wanna end up all over the internet. I pride myself in keeping a low profile. My private life is private.

Lindsay Lohan: Okay, what is that?
Charlie Sheen: Just unraveling the old hose.
Charlie Sheen: Save it for tomorrow, Raul!
Raul - the Gardener: Si senor.

Lindsay Lohan: I'm going to blow you across the room!
Charlie Sheen: Sounds awesome.

Lindsay Lohan: I don't want to end up all over the Internet. I pride myself on keeping a low profile. My private life is private... wait, what are all these?
Charlie Sheen: Oh, just some movies I rented.
Lindsay Lohan: Me and Brandy, missionary?
Charlie Sheen: A tale of two girls who become nuns.
Lindsay Lohan: And what are all those?
Charlie Sheen: Oh, it's just your standard home security setup, basic run of the mill.
Lindsay Lohan: And why do you need security cameras pointing at your bed.
Charlie Sheen: In case a burglar tries to steal my sex tapes.

Charlie Sheen: Do me a favor. Promise me you won't drive.
Lindsay Lohan: That's sweet. You're worried about me driving.
Charlie Sheen: I'm worried about me. I'm a pedestrian.


"Family Guy: I Dream of Jesus (#7.2)" (2008)
Guy at party: Woah, Lindsay Lohan just took her top off!
Lindsay Lohan: Wow, I just drank a beer! Who wants to do me?
Guy at party: I know I already did you but I'll come again!