Dr. Amber Volakis
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Quotes for
Dr. Amber Volakis (Character)
from "House M.D." (2004)

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"House M.D.: Under My Skin (#5.23)" (2009)
Dr. Gregory House: I acknowledge my subconscious exists. Now go away!
Dr. Amber Volakis: Saying it is one thing. Living it is another. You're not rational, not completely.

Dr. Eric Foreman: That's basically waterboarding.
Dr. James Wilson: It's pretty radical.
Dr. Amber Volakis: It's a great idea.
Dr. Gregory House: Regular radical, me radical or me out-of-my-mind radical?
Dr. James Wilson: Somewhere between regular and you.
Dr. Gregory House: So what's the problem?

Dr. James Wilson: You didn't do anything wrong. You prescribed anti-biotics. Any other doctor would've done the *exact* same thing.
Dr. Amber Volakis: "Any other doctor?" Words can hurt, you know?

Dr. James Wilson: Her?
Dr. Amber Volakis: Oops.
Dr. Gregory House: Kutner was secretly a woman. That's why he killed himself... It's Amber.
Dr. James Wilson: Your subconscious picked my dead girlfriend?
Dr. Gregory House: Yeah. My irrational part of my brain works like the rational part of yours. How about that?

Dr. Gregory House: These people don't know me. You do.
Dr. Amber Volakis: She's not your keeper. She has no responsibility for you!
Dr. Gregory House: I need you.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: [pause] Let me call my babysitter.

Dr. Amber Volakis: [House is crawling towards a pill] You're pathetic. If you want the pill just send her home. But you can't because that would be admitting defeat to her... Now this is interesting. If you take the pill you don't deserve her. If you secretly take the pill, you don't deserve anyone!


"House M.D.: House Divided (#5.22)" (2009)
Dr. Amber Volakis: Aren't you a little curious about why I'm here?
Dr. Gregory House: Curious why no French maid's outfit. No spanky pants.
Dr. Amber Volakis: I'm a hallucination not a fantasy.

Dr. Amber Volakis: You're going to ignore your own subconscious? It's gonna be the limp leading the blind.

Thirteen: If I get drunk enough, there's a chance I might make out with one of the strippers, or become one.
Dr. Gregory House, Dr. Amber Volakis: Sold!

Dr. Gregory House: I knew about her body butter, and his strawberry allergy. I tried to kill Chase. Why would I do that? I don't want Cameron.
Dr. Amber Volakis: You're not a big fan of other people's happiness.


"House M.D.: Guardian Angels (#4.4)" (2007)
Dr. Amber Volakis: It could be a tumor to the temporal lobe.
Dr. Chris Taub: Not with a normal CT scan.
Dr. Amber Volakis: You mean it appeared normal to the doc in the ER.
Dr. Gregory House: Way to get right back on that horse, Thirteen.
Thirteen: No, that was Amber.
Dr. Gregory House: Nice try, Cutthroat Bitch. That was the worst Thirteen imitation I've ever heard.

[Dobson and Taub are fighting]
Dr. Gregory House: That is just great.
Henry Dobson: What is?
Dr. Chris Taub: Which one of us is?
Dr. Gregory House: Both of you. Together. Fighting. Passionate to prove the other one wrong. Couldn't care less about the patient, but it all works out the same.
Dr. Amber Volakis: I hate Thirteen!
Dr. Gregory House: Not as productively.

[Cole just punched House]
Dr. Amber Volakis: I know what she has!
Dr. Gregory House: You couldn't have spoken up 10 seconds ago? Could have saved me a hundred bucks.

Dr. Amber Volakis: Dr. Cuddy, I'm Amber Volakis, one of Dr. House's new fellows.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: Sexual harassment claims go through HR, stress-related leaves through workman's comp and any accusations of criminal activities go directly to the Princeton Plainsboro's police department.


"House M.D.: Don't Ever Change (#4.12)" (2008)
Amber Volakis: I call you Greg because we're now social equals.
Dr. Gregory House: And I call you Cutthroat Bitch, well, quod erat demonstrandum. And I speak in Latin because I don't try to hide what an ass I am.

Amber Volakis: Why do you have to believe that I have an ulterior motive?
Dr. Gregory House: For the same reason I believe that crack whores can have sex. For crack.


"House M.D.: Wilson's Heart (#4.16)" (2008)
Dr. Gregory House: I could stay here with you.
Dr. Amber Volakis: Get off the bus.
Dr. Gregory House: I can't.
Dr. Amber Volakis: Why not?
Dr. Gregory House: Because... because it doesn't hurt here. Because I... I don't want to be in pain, I don't want to be miserable. And I don't want him to hate me.
Dr. Amber Volakis: Well... you can't always get what you want.

Dr. James Wilson: Why aren't you angry?
Dr. Amber Volakis: That is not the last feeling I want to experience.


"House M.D.: Ugly (#4.7)" (2007)
Dr. Amber Volakis: [refering to Dr. Terzi] Why did you bring her in so late? It's not fair, the rest of us...
Dr. Gregory House: If you wanted fair, you picked the wrong job, the wrong profession... the wrong species.

Dr. Amber Volakis: [refering to Dr. Terzi] Why did you hire her?
Dr. Gregory House: Because she has way more diagnostic experience than the other swimsuit models I was considering.


"House M.D.: No More Mr. Nice Guy (#4.13)" (2008)
Dr. Amber Volakis: Take my deal, or get out of my apartment.
Dr. Gregory House: Take *my* deal, or I move in.

Dr. Gregory House: [Both are on dirty-linen duty for breaking the "custody" rules over Wilson] Where are you going Friday night?
Dr. Amber Volakis: L'AUBERGE.
Dr. Gregory House: You're lying.
Dr. Amber Volakis: Of course I am.
[Wilson is out of hearing-range around the corner giggling to himself]


"House M.D.: Saviors (#5.21)" (2009)
[last lines]
Dr. Amber Volakis: [to House] Solved another case. Busted Wilson. Looks like you're not losing it after all.


"House M.D.: 97 Seconds (#4.3)" (2007)
Amber Volakis: Why did you page me?
Dr. Gregory House: Because if I pooped myself in front of Wilson, I'd never hear the end of it.


"House M.D.: Mirror Mirror (#4.5)" (2007)
Taub: So... which of us sucks the most?
Dr. Gregory House: It's a tie.
Dr. Amber Volakis: Between?
Dr. Gregory House: All of you.
Dr. Amber Volakis: We're all fired?
Dr. Gregory House: None of you are fired.


"House M.D.: Both Sides Now (#5.24)" (2009)
Amber: [to House] So... this is the story you made up about who you are. It's a nice one.
Dr. Lawrence Kutner: Too bad it isn't true.


"House M.D.: Games (#4.9)" (2007)
Dr. Gregory House: Amber, please, stand up.
Dr. Amber Volakis: You didn't call me 'Bitch'. Is that bad?