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: [as a vampire, standing before an open window
] I shall swoop down upon their unsuspecting necks!
[Gilligan jumps out of the window, followed shortly by a crashing sound. Gilligan is then seen climbing back in through the same window
] Ginger Grant
: [as Gilligan the vampire's wife
] What happened? Gilligan
: I forgot to turn into a bat! Ginger Grant
: What kind of a vampire are you, anyway?
: [Looking into a mirror
] All I get is a blank expression. Mary Ann Summers
: You don't need a mirror, you're still beautiful. Ginger Grant
: Oh, I know. But I like to get another opinion.
[Spotting a Coast Guard helicopter
: I can't believe it. After 15 years, we're finally rescued. Mr. Howell
: Rescued. Mrs. Howell
: Rescued. Ginger Grant
: Rescued. Mary Ann
: Rescued. Professor
: Rescued. Gilligan
: That's not the way to blow up a volcano. I was in a movie once and that's not what they did.
Professor Roy Hinkley
: [All the castaways are present, seated or standing around the communal table with the radio on it. They are all ad-libbing as the Professor hears the radio
] Wait a minute! Quiet! The announcement, quiet! Quiet! Radio Announcer
: And now they are activating the robot's receptor spools to see if they can find out how it got to Hawaii. The next voice you hear will be that of the robot. Robot
] I have been on a deserted island. The putt breaks to the right. Thurston Howell III
: Well, it was a lucky shot! Robot
] Sweep back and forth, back and forth. I was stranded. This is the way we wash our clothes. Radio Announcer
: Ladies and gentlemen, the scientists from the laboratory are checking to see exactly what went wrong. Perhaps now we can learn the reason the recorded messages are all scrambled... A WHAT?... Ladies and gentlemen, believe it or not, a RABBIT'S FOOT was just found in the robot!
[Everyone slowly looks directly at Gilligan, with those who were seated slowly getting up. Gilligan smiles rather embarrassingly whilst shying away from their stares
] Radio Announcer
: It demagnetized the entire receptor spools. There is now no chance of finding out where the robot has been, who reprogrammed it, or how it got to Hawaii. For that matter, how the rabbit's foot got in there in the first place! Jonas 'The Skipper' Grumby
, Thurston Howell III
, Mrs. Lovey Howell
, Ginger Grant
, Professor Roy Hinkley
, Mary Ann Summers
: [Almost unbelievingly
] GILLIGAN? Gilligan
: I just thought it'd bring us some luck, ya know?
[Gilligan then slips under the table while the Skipper and Professor go after him as the scene fades out
: Where's Mary Ann? Duke Williams
: Baby, we don't need a cheering section. Ginger Grant
: I do, I'm an actress.
Mary Ann Summers
: [Gilligan is standing guard outside a hut where the Professor and the Skipper are assembling a geiger counter
] Is everyone ready for the Christmas party? Ginger Grant
: Christmas party? You mean birthday party! Lovey Howell
: Anniversary party! Thurston Howell III
: Young man, what do you have to say for yourself? Gilligan
: Just one word.
[turns and opens door of hut
[Skipper and Professor fall over in surprise, ruining progress on assembling the Geiger counter
: [Gilligan & Skipper are collecting natural gas. Ginger arrives and finds Gilligan on the ground, out cold
] What happened to Gilligan? Jonas 'The Skipper' Grumby
: Oh, I told him there was gas in the bottle, but he didn't believe me, so he uncorked the bottle and took a big sniff...
[the Skipper duplicates these actions, then gets a really goofy expression on his face and starts dancing
: [regarding the lost ticket
] Let's see... it couldn't be in that tin box buried down at the base of that big palm tree by the lagoon. Ginger Grant
: I didn't know there was a tin box buried under that tree! Gilligan
: There isn't. That's why it couldn't be there.
: Agent 36-25-36 reporting, sir.
: [Gilligan puts a blanket around Ginger
] Gilligan, it's much too hot for a blanket. Gilligan
: It won't be in a few minutes. I used a lot of bleach on your dress. Ginger Grant
: [Looks at her dress under the blanket
] Oh no! Gilligan
: Oh yes! Ginger Grant
: [as her dress slides off under the blanket
] Oh my!
Mary Ann Summers
: I used to be a Girl Scout, and they teach you a lot! Ginger
: I used to go with a Boy Scout, and they teach you a lot, too.
Mary Ann Summers
: [kisses Dr. Balinkoff
] That's for seeing our fire Ginger Grant
: [also kisses him
] That's for coming to our rescue Mary Ann Summers
: [kisses him again
] That's for taking us off the island Dr. Boris Balinkoff
: [Ginger gives him a long passionate kiss on the lips
] What was that for? Ginger Grant
: That's for being a man!
: [regarding his poor childhood
] What did you and your family do for entertainment? Norbert Wiley
: We used to sit around and watch each other get skinny.
: [She finished talking to Gilligan seductively with her arms around his neck in order to distract him enough to discreetly take his four-leaf clover medallion off his neck and slip it in her pocketbook, after she finished she seems disappointed she couldn't successfully seduce him
] Oh well. I guess I don't have what it takes. Gilligan
: [Holding up the medallion to show her
] You also don't have what you took, either. Ginger Grant
: [Shocked, she opens her pocketbook to see it's not in there
] Oh Gilligan! You're impossible!
[She storms off while Gilligan acts giddy
: I learned a little Hawaiian when I was singing in a club in Waikiki. Wahine wiki huki luki nu, and every word of it comes from the bottom of my heart. Gilligan
: Gee, that's real nice, Ginger. What does it mean? Ginger Grant
: "This bar is off limits to all military personnel."
Thurston Howell III
: How am I supposed to see you through all this barley? Ginger Grant
: Sorry about that, Chief.