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: Do you ever feel like a chess piece yourself? In a game being played against your will. Prince Albert
: Do you? Princess Victoria
: Constantly. I see them leaning in and moving me around the board. Prince Albert
: The Duchess and Sir John? Princess Victoria
: Not just them. Uncle Leopold. The king. I'm sure half the politicians are ready to seize hold of my skirts and drag me from square to square. Prince Albert
: Then you had better master the rules of the game until you play it better than they can. Princess Victoria
: You don't recommend I find a husband to play it for me? Prince Albert
: I should find one to play it with you, not for you.
: [accepting his letter from Victoria
] As a matter of interest, will a time come when I read them first? Baron Stockmar
: You'll enjoy this. She has a real flair for description.
: I'm going back to England. Baron Stockmar
: There must be a reason if you wish to visit Her Majesty. Prince Albert
: Then find me a reason.
: I just got your note. I was riding. Queen Victoria
: Sit, please. Prince Albert
: The park is marvelous. Queen Victoria
: I'm so pleased you like it. I do want you to feel quite at home... I'm sure you're aware why I wished you to come here. Because it would make me happier than anything, too happy really, if you would agree to what I wish. Prince Albert
: And stay with you? Queen Victoria
: And stay with me. Prince Albert
: And marry you? Queen Victoria
: And marry me!
: Your Highness, there's your opening if you'll take my advice... Prince Albert
: Lord Melbourne, forgive me but you seem to have confused me with a member of your club. I am not your drinking companion nor your whist partner. I am the husband of your sovereign. And as such, I will make my own decisions, and I neither seek nor invite your advice. Good evening.
: I will not have my role usurped! I wear the crown! And if there are mistakes they will be my mistakes, and no one else will make them! No one, not even you! Prince Albert
: I am leaving before you excite yourself and harm the child. Queen Victoria
: You will go when I dismiss you. I am your queen, and I am telling you to stay! Prince Albert
: Good night, Victoria.
] Queen Victoria
: [storms over to door
] You may not go! You may not go! I order you to stay here in this room! Albert!
: For pity's sake, smile, woman. Anyone would think we had quarreled. Princess Victoria
: Don't talk to me.
] I'm so sorry! I thought I was going to lose you! Prince Albert
: I don't think he was a very good shot. Queen Victoria
: Why did you do it? So stupid, why did you do it? Prince Albert
: I had two very good reasons. First, I am replaceable and you are not. Queen Victoria
: You are not replaceable to me! Prince Albert
: Second, you're the only wife I've got or ever will have. You are my whole existence, and I will love you until my very last breath.
: [repeated line, to Victoria
] Good morning, wife.
Sir John Conroy
] I cannot believe I'm being subjected to this interrogation. Prince Albert
: [sitting behind a desk, piled with papers
] You're not being subjected to anything, Sir John. You have been in charge of the Duchess's finances for many years. Indeed, you have made public statements testifying to their health. Sir John Conroy
: I have! Duchess of Kent
: And I am so grateful. Prince Albert
: All I am asking is that you will be so good as to tell us exactly where the money has gone.
: You know when we are old and surrounded with our children we will look on this as the day our life began. Queen Victoria
: Not TOO surrounded please...
[Victoria climbs on top of Albert and holds him down by the wrists
] Queen Victoria
: ...and not too soon. Prince Albert
: Oh. I am expecting a very LARGE family.
[Victoria giggles and Albert and Victoria embrace
: Victoria. Princess Victoria
: It's all right, Lehzen. Albert can take me up.
] Princess Victoria
: You'll have to hold my hand. Mama insists. I hope you don't mind. Prince Albert
: Not in the least. Princess Victoria
: What did you want to say? Prince Albert
: Only that I understand more than you think of what your life is. Princess Victoria
: Do you? Prince Albert
: My childhood wasn't easy, either. I lost my mother when I was a boy. Princess Victoria
: I know. She died. Prince Albert
: No. That is, she did die. Eventually. But she was sent away long before that. There was some difficulty... It was all hushed up and no one talks of it now. But I know what it is to live alone, inside your head, while never giving a clue as to your real feelings. Princess Victoria
: Did Uncle Leopold ask you to tell me that? Prince Albert
: No. He actually told me never to mention it. Princess Victoria
: Well, how little he knows me. Prince Albert
] May I write to you?
[Alexandra passionately kisses Agi
] Prince Albert
: That's a different matter. That's a completely different matter altogether.
] Prince Albert
: Your father used to call you his swan, so I am told. I think that's a good thing to remember. Think what it means to be a swan: to glide like a dream on the smooth surface of the lake, and never go to the shore. On dry land, where ordinary people walk, the swan is awkward, even ridiculous. When she waddles up the bank she painfully resembles a different kind of bird, n'est-ce-pas? Princess Alexandra
: A goose. Prince Albert
: I'm afraid so. And there she must stay, out on the lake: silent, white, majestic. Be a bird, but never fly. Know one song, but never sing it until the moment of death. And so it must be for you, Alexandra: cool indifference to the staring crowds along the bank. And the song? Never. Princess Alexandra
: Take me inside, Albert.
[Albert takes her hand, and they go inside the palace together
[Blackadder has just unwittingly slammed the door in the faces of Queen Victoria and Prince Albert
] Ebeneezer Blackadder
: I am not at home to guests! Prince Albert
: I flatter myzelf ve are llather special guests, sir. Ebeneezer Blackadder
: Oh, of course, I must apologize! It isn't often that one receives a Christmas visit from two such distinguished guests. Prince Albert
: Ah, zo you llecognize us at last! Ebeneezer Blackadder
: Yes! Unless I'm very much mistaken, you're the winner of the 'Round Britain Shortest Fattest Dumpiest Woman Competition. And for her to be accompanied by the winner of this year's Stupidest Accent Award is really quite overwhelming.
: Cork it, fatso! Don't you realise that this is the Victorian Age, where apart from Queen Piglet-Features herself, women and children are to be seen and not heard! Prince Albert
: Queen Piglet-Features! Ebenezer Blackadder
: Yes! "Empress Oink," us lads call her. The only person in the kingdom who looks dafter than her is that stupid Frankfurter of a husband. "The Pig and the Prig," we call them. How they ever managed to produce their one hundred and twelve children is quite beyond me. The bed-chambers of Buckingham Palace must be copiously supplied with blindfolds!
: [Victoria bangs on Albert's study door
] Who is it? Victoria
: [In a loud annoyed voice
] What do you mean? "Who is it?" It's your queen! Prince Albert
: [Victoria takes a deep breath and calms down a bit knocks on the door calmly
] Who is it? Victoria
: [In a calm and quiet voice
] It's your wife.
[Albert opens the door and Victoria goes in and closes the door quietly
: I'm not speaking as your husband I am speaking as Vicky's Father!
: If an Englishman grows sentiments, he goes out into the garden and shoots himself.