The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
: Careful, Roger! Don't slam the door. Roger Addison
: Why? Your brother taking a nap? Kay Addison
: No, I have his favorite cake in the oven, strawberry shortcake. I don't want any noise or vibration in the house for the cake might fall. Roger Addison
: Great, strawberry shortcake for him. Girl Scout cookies for me.
: Where is that loafing brother of yours? Did he bring my car back yet or did he sell it? Kay Addison
: Doll, Ralph has had a lot of tough breaks and he needs us now. He's been unemployed for several years and he has no place to live. It's just until he gets back on his feet. Roger Addison
: You know what his problem is? He's not cut out to be a press agent. He should take any job he can get as long as he's gainfull and legaly employed. Kay Addison
: I don't agree with you. Someday he'll stumble upon some great big publicty stunt, and he'll be on his way. Roger Addison
: Out of my house I hope.
: [looks at a $40 parking ticket that Ralph got
] I am not paying this ticket. Ralph
: Oh, brother-in-law, you don't want me to go to jail, do you? Roger Addison
: You bet your sweet... Kay Addison
: [cutting Roger off
] Doll! Roger Addison
: Kay, I am not paying that parking ticket. Ralph got the ticket. Let him pay it himself from the money out of his unemployment check. Kay Addison
: Absoulutely not! You heard the poor boy at how long he waited in line to collect it. Roger Addison
: You are incredible... both of you! That't it! I'm going out to play golf. Kay Addison
: You can't. Roger Addison
: Why not? Kay Addison
: I already promised Ralph that he could borrow your clubs this afternoon. Ralph
: You can have them tomorrow, Roger. Roger Addison
: Great! Now, I'll have to go shopping for new golf clubs!
: [seeing Kay carring a serving tray
] What's this? Kay Addison
: Ralph's breakfast. Roger Addison
: At one in the afternoon? Kay Addison
: Ralph only got up an hour ago. He didn't get much sleep for he was up most of the night. Roger Addison
: Yeah, I know. I heard him. Running up and down the stairs to the refrigerator. Kay Addison
: Give him a break. You know Ralph is a compulsive eater when he's not working. Roger Addison
: If he doesn't get out of this house and go find a job, he's going to be a compulsive starver. Next to him, Mister Ed, that lazy horse of Wilbur's has had a job at the Tally Ho Stables for over a month now. Kay Addison
: Are you comparing my brother to a horse? Roger Addison
: Why not? He eats like one.
: I'm terribly excited about this, and I put your name down for a fifty-dollar contribution toward the statue. Roger Addison
: Why is it in a country of free speech, every time you open your mouth it costs me money?
: What do you say, doll? Shall I beg Doctor Ed to operate on you? Roger Addison
: Never! Kay Addison
: But you can't go through life without a condenser. Roger Addison
: Does it make any difference to you? Kay Addison
: Oh come on, you just got to get Doctor Ed save you. You know how awful I look in black. Roger Addison
: No! I don't want that quack of a horse to operate on my brain. Besides, his fee for the operation is ridiculous. $10,000 for a simple brain operation. Kay Addison
: But it's only money. You can't take it with you if you die. Roger Addison
: Yes, I can. I'll eat it before I go.
: [addressing a policeman, while standing next to Ed's smashed up horse trailer
] Did you see this accident? Miguel
: No, Señor. Wilbur Post
: Didn't you see anything? Miguel
: If I see, I say. I don't see, I don't say. Kay Addison
: You don't say. Miguel
: Si. I say I don't see.
[Mister Ed, alone in his stall, picks up Wilbur's ringing office phone
] Mister Ed
: Hello? Kay Addison
] Hello? I'd like to make a reservation. Is this Trans Continental Airlines? Mister Ed
: No, lady. This is the Pony Express!
: [while waiting for the Posts to answer their front door
] Now, Kay, I want you to promise me that you won't interfere with their lives again. Kay Addison
: I did not interfere. Roger Addison
: Why do you have to make the whole world miserable? I'm married to you - let's keep it in the family.