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Quotes for
Destro (Character)
from "G.I. Joe" (1985)

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G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)
McCullen: I'm gonna make you very unhappy.
Duke: I'm already unhappy.

[from trailer]
Destro: What did you say your unit was called?
General Hawk: I didn't.

Zartan: American politics. Governors, senators, congressmen. No wonder nothing ever gets done.
Destro: That's what we're going to fix, Mr. Zartan.

The Doctor: Now that we have a moment to ourselves, I've designed something especially for you, James.
Destro: [shocked] No!
[the Doctor injects nanomites into James McCullen's head]
The Doctor: This will only hurt a little. What comes next, more so. Nanomites, perfect little healers.
[James McCullen's head becomes completely silver]
Destro: I've finally taken my place in the long line of McCullens.
The Doctor: James McCullen is no more. Now you are Destro.
Destro: What have you done to me?
The Doctor: The time has come for the cobra to rise up and reveal himself. You will call me Commander.

Storm Shadow: [holding the Warheads] Three left.
Destro: Take the warheads to the missiles. I want them ready to launch in one hour.
Storm Shadow: It will be done.

The Doctor: Are you ready, Mr. Zartan?
Zartan: Oh I'm ready, doctor. This is going to be the achievement of a lifetime.
The Doctor: Yes, as a master of disguise you have no equal, my friend.
Zartan: [confident] 18 months of studying my target, learning mannerisms but the devil is in the details.
Destro: [interrupts] Gentlemen, let's get it going.
Zartan: One more thing, I'll control my own brain thank you very much... Let's do this.

The Doctor: So far we've created 20 Neo-Vipers. Nineteen stand before you.
Destro: Is it working?
The Doctor: We injected 1,000 cc of the nanomite solution into each subject. When they finally stopped screaming, brain scans showed a complete inactivity of the self-preservation region of the cortex.
Destro: English, Doctor?
The Doctor: They feel no fear. Cortical nerve clusters showed complete inactivity. They feel no pain. Concepts of morality are disengaged. They feel no regrets. No remorse.

Destro: Are they completely obedient?
The Doctor: Of course. The real world applications are endless. So, you tell me, is it working?
Destro: Send a team to rendezvous with Storm Shadow and the Baroness.
The Doctor: Consider it done. The Joes will never know what hit them.

The Doctor: Now, if we sold one warhead on the black market, I could continue my research.
Destro: [interrupts] I appreciate your thirst for knowledge, Doctor, but this world is messy enough. No. What it needs is unification, leadership. It has to be taken out of chaos by someone with complete control. Beijing, Moscow, Washington... When these missiles detonate, the world will turn to the most powerful man on the planet. When I'm finished, the money will take care of itself. You'll be able to do all the research you want.

The Baroness: If I were really there, I might actually let you touch me.
Destro: I'll send a jet.
The Baroness: Business first. Besides, I'm married, remember?
Storm Shadow: If you had sent me in the first place, it would already be done.
Destro: I'm sending you now, Storm Shadow. No more mistakes. The schedule mustn't compromise any further. Keep your eye on her for me.

Destro: [handling an old iron mask] This belongs to an ancestor of mine. He was caught selling arms to both sides. The French forced him to wear it for the rest of his life. They called him Destro, destroyer of nations.
Storm Shadow: So why do you keep it?
Destro: So that I never forget the most important rule in dealing arms.
The Baroness: Let me guess. Never sell to both sides?
Destro: Never get caught selling to both sides.

[first lines]
Bastille Prison Warden: James McCullen, you Scottish pig, you've been found guilty of treason for the sale of military arms to the enemies of our Lord, King Louis XIII, even whilst you sold arms to our Lord himself.
James McCullen - 1641: Your king is a vile bag of filth who murders his own allies. I should have charged him double.
Bastille Prison Warden: You tried to overthrow the Crown in conspiracy with its enemies.
James McCullen - 1641: Unlike your simpleton king, his enemies know that is the true McCullen destiny not simple to supply arms, but to run the wars!
Bastille Prison Warden: Do you anything else to say before the sentence is carried out?
James McCullen - 1641: Yes, I do. Clan McCullen is far greater and more powerful than any of you could ever imagine. My sons will continue to rise long after I am gone, as will their sons and, God willing, their sons. It shall not end with my death!
Bastille Prison Warden: We are not going to kill you, McCullen. We're going to make an example of you! So that no man, woman nor child may ever see your treacherous face again, you shall wear this mask for the term of your natural life.

"Robot Chicken: G.I. Jogurt (#7.1)" (2014)
[as the G.I. Joes win an Emmy award in PSAs]
Cobra Commander: Look at them, Destro! The Joes churn out pedestrian advice to dead-eyed children, and the public eats it up! "Hey kids, don't play with poles and electric lights!" - reads like a dispatch from the No Shit Clinic!
Destro: I'll get the nerve gas!
Cobra Commander: No, you fool, we'll beat them at their own game! We will create our own PSAs!

Baroness: [enters] Oh, I forgot you guys were in here writing! I was just looking for a hammer to hang my degree in screenwriting from Applebee's! Anything I can do for you while I'm in here?
Baroness: Destro?
Destro: She's actually really funny, guys...
Cobra Commander: You lost me at "She's". Fuck it, we're doing it without a script!

[as the G.I. Joes win an Emmy award in PSAs]
Destro: Pump the nerve gas!

"G.I. Joe: The Pyramid of Darkness: Part 5 - Knotting Cobra's Coils (#1.5)" (1985)
Baroness: Something is happening!
Destro: Brilliant deduction, Baroness.
Baroness: Don't become hostile with me! We have a relationship!

Cobra Commander: Come in, Destro.
[Monitor comes on showing Destro and the Baroness kissing]
Cobra Commander: Stop that, Destro! I see you both clearly and I am stunned!
Destro: She had something in her eye, Cobra Commander...
Cobra Commander: My eye she did!

G.I. Joe: The Movie (1987) (V)
Cobra Commander: Go ahead. Make me the scapegoat. My loyal subordinates could testify to my superb stewardship of Cobra. But you don't have the courage to let them speak!
Serpentor: Wrong again! Defend him if you can.
Cobra Commander: Indeed they shall. You first, noble Destro.
Destro: Militarily speaking, it's only fair to say that Cobra Commander is a world-class... buffoon.
Cobra Commander: WHAT?

Serpentor: Blunderers! Fools! We possess power greater than any on Earth! Yet our conquests are stripped from us on every front! Our most dangerous enemy is NOT G.I. Joe but YOUR collective incompetence!
Cobra Commander: Hogwash!
Serpentor: WHAT? You dare say?
Cobra Commander: The fault, most imperial Serpentor, lies not within us, but within YOU! Your leadership has been pompous, pusilanimous and pathetic!
Baroness: What did he say!
Zarana: He's gone batty!
Dr. Mindbender: That's treason!
Tomax: I don't believe it!
Serpentor: Yes, leadership IS at the very heart of this matter. But it's not mine that's inadequate, Cobra Commander, it is YOURS! Your ego driven stupidity has converted victory into catastrophe FOR THE LAST TIME!
Cobra Commander: Go ahead. Make me the scapegoat. My loyal subordinates could testify to my superb stewardship of Cobra. But you don't have the courage to let them speak!
Serpentor: Wrong again! Defend him if you can.
Cobra Commander: Indeed they shall! You first, noble Destro.
Destro: Militarily speaking, it is only fair to say that Cobra Commander is a world-class... buffoon.
Cobra Commander: WHAT? Baroness, Dr. Mindbender, brave Xomat and Tomax... you won't let Destro's treacherous assassination of my character go unchallenged, will you?
Dr. Mindbender: Certainly not! Destro forgot to mention your frequent displays of cowardice!
Cobra Commander: Oh!
[Cut to Pythona emerging from the lake and breaking into Cobra's headquarters and back again to the other Cobras blaming Cobra Commander for their repeated failures]
Baroness: And you botched our desert campaign!
Destro: We had won but YOU countermanded my order!
Baroness: You meddling brought us defeat! Again and again and again!
Dr. Mindbender: You're not just a fool, you're Cobra's curse!
Tomax: Inept!
Xamot: Insufficient!
Tomax, Xamot: Inexcusable!
Cobra Commander: Unsubstantiated fantasy! Lies, lies, LIES!

"G.I. Joe: Renegades: Castle Destro (#1.17)" (2011)
Baroness: A suit of armor. How inventive.
Destro: Actually, it's one of my new Battle Android Troopers. Robots inside armor, for security's sake.
Baroness: The Commander will be so pleased.
Destro: Must you always put his interests ahead of yours, Baroness? The B.A.T.s are a gift to you, not to him.

"G.I. Joe: The Pyramid of Darkness: Part 4 - Chaos in the Sea of Lost Souls (#1.4)" (1985)
Destro: I do not agree with our leader's change of heart.
Baroness: Has the noble Destro forgotten, our leader has no heart?

"G.I. Joe: Skeletons in the Closet (#1.53)" (1985)
Destro: And to think, I actually believed I was related to a G.I. Joe.
Baroness: I checked the records, Destro darling. You are!

"G.I. Joe: The Pyramid of Darkness: Part 1 - The Further Adventures of G.I. Joe (#1.1)" (1985)
Destro: Destroy the G.I. Joe Marauders before they remove the canopy!
Flint: Gung-Ho, make bumper face entirely unwelcome!

"G.I. Joe: Operation Mind Menace (#1.22)" (1985)
Airborne: [locked in a cage after being captured by Cobra] You don't scare us.
Flash: Yeah. Do your worst, snake breath!
Airborne: What are you going to do with my brother!?!?
Destro: What can it matter to you? You are about to die!
Airborne: You'd deny a dying man his last request!?!?
Cobra Commander: A point well taken!

G.I. Joe: Spy Troops the Movie (2003) (TV)
Destro: Trust me, Commander...
Cobra Commander: Destro, I never trust anyone!