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Quotes for
Harlan Arliss (Character)
from "CHiPs" (1977)

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"CHiPs: Peaks and Valleys (#2.1)" (1978)
Harlan: [Watching wistfully as Ponch and Jon ride off] Ah, if I was two inches taller, I would be cracking the bricks with them.
Sgt. Joseph Getraer: Well, look at the flip side, Harlan. If you were two inches shorter, you'd be riding losers at Hollywood Park.


"CHiPs: High Explosive (#2.12)" (1978)
Officer Arthur Grossman: [Commenting on Barry's admiration for Jon] Kid thinks you're Matt Dillon and the Lone Ranger rolled into one.


"CHiPs: Sharks (#4.13)" (1981)
[Final scene; Toni and Sharon prepared a celebratory dinner of hamburgers and kelp salad for the Central L.A. team. Sergeants Aikens & Getraer and Ponch serve themselves]
Sgt. Aikens: Well, J. Rodney Cameron has some very influential friends. Probably spend three years inside. You know, the one who arrested the guy?
Sgt. Joseph Getraer: Yeah. But when we left him, he wasn't singing, but he was humming.
Officer Francis Llewellyn 'Ponch' Poncherello: Hey Aikens, why don't try the salad? It's delicious.
Sgt. Aikens: What is it, Kelp?
Officer Francis Llewellyn 'Ponch' Poncherello: Yeah.
Sgt. Aikens: Oh, yeah, I love it.
Officer Francis Llewellyn 'Ponch' Poncherello: Figures.
[Ponch sits down with Jon, Jed, Bear, Grossie, and Bonnie]
Officer Bonnie Clark: Sergeant, what's gonna happen to those two guys that sunk the boat?
Sgt. Aikens: They belong to the Feds. We don't need them.
Officer Francis Llewellyn 'Ponch' Poncherello: [eats his burger] Hey Sharon, these burgers are super. Did you make 'em?
Sharon: No, they're Toni's invention.
Officer Francis Llewellyn 'Ponch' Poncherello: Great, Toni. How did get that flavor?
Toni: Oh, it's a combination of things. Mostly seaweed and shark meat.
[the camera freezes on Jon and Ponch, completely shocked]
Toni: [jokes; Sharon smiles] Kidding, Ponch. Just kidding.
[Bonnie laughs, Jed chuckles, and Ponch & Jon smirks with Bear smiling in the background. The camera then freezes on Sgts. Aikens and Getraer, both smiling]
Officer Arthur Grossman: [mumbles] It's good.
[Jon laughs. The camera freezes back on Ponch & Jon with Bear in the background, then fades to black]