Salvatore Maroni
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Quotes for
Salvatore Maroni (Character)
from The Dark Knight (2008)

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The Dark Knight (2008)
The Chechen: [During a private sit down meeting with the gangsters] What do you propose?
The Joker: It's simple. We, uh, kill the Batman.
[mobsters laugh]
Salvatore Maroni: If it's so simple, why haven't you done it already?
The Joker: If you're good at something, never do it for free.

Two-Face: [in the back seat of his car while pointing a gun at him] Going to join your wife? Do you love her?
Salvatore Maroni: Yes.
Two-Face: Did you ever wonder what it would be like to listen to her die?
Salvatore Maroni: Look, take it up with the Joker. He killed your woman. He made you - like this.
[gestures at Harvey's face]
Two-Face: The Joker's just a mad dog. I want whoever let him off the leash.

Salvatore Maroni: [in the back seat of his car] Look, if I tell you, will you let me go?
Two-Face: Can't hurt your chances.
Salvatore Maroni: It was Ramirez.
[Two-Face pulls the coin out and cocks his gun]
Salvatore Maroni: [panicking] But you said...
Two-Face: I said it couldn't hurt your chances.
[flips coin; good side]
Two-Face: You're a lucky man.
[flips again; bad side]
Two-Face: He's not.
Salvatore Maroni: Who?
Two-Face: [buckles seat belt] Your driver.
[He shoots the driver in the back; the car goes flying off the road]

Salvatore Maroni: [Batman holds him out over a ledge] From one professional to another, if you're trying to scare somebody, pick a better spot. From this height, the fall wouldn't kill me.
Batman: I'm counting on it.
[he drops Maroni off the ledge, breaking his legs]

Maroni's Mistress: [sitting next to each other in a club] Can't we go someplace quieter? We can't hear each other talk.
Salvatore Maroni: What makes you think I want to hear you talk?

Batman: [about the Joker] Where is he?
Salvatore Maroni: I don't know where he is, he found us!
Batman: He must have friends!
Salvatore Maroni: [incredulous] Friends? Have you met this guy?

The Chechen: [During a private sit down meeting with the gangsters] Who's stupid enough to steal from us?
Salvatore Maroni: Some two-bit whack-job. Wears a cheap purple suit and make-up. He's not the problem. He's a nobody.

Salvatore Maroni: [sitting in the defendant's chair] I thought the D.A. just played golf with the mayor, things like that?
Harvey Dent: [standing in front of the prosecution table] Tee off's one-thirty, more than enough time to put you away for life, Sally.

Salvatore Maroni: [to Batman who is interrogating him about The Joker] No one's gonna tell you nothin'. They're wise to your act. You got rules. The Joker, he's got no rules. No one's gonna cross him to you. You want this guy, you got one way. But you already know what that is. Just take off that mask and let him come find you. Or you gonna let a couple more people get killed while you make your mind?

[Gordon and the police arrive to arrest Maroni in a restaurant]
Salvatore Maroni: You sure you wanna embarrass me in front of my friends, Lieutenant?
Lt. James Gordon: Oh, don't worry. They're coming too.

[after visiting the scarred Dent in the hospital, Gordon emerges and sees Maroni there, leaning on a cane]
Salvatore Maroni: This craziness... it's too much.
Lt. James Gordon: You should have thought of that before you let the clown out of the box.

Harvey Dent: [on TV] I don't know about Mr. Lau's travel arrangements, but I'm sure glad he's here.
The Chechen: I put word out. We hire the clown.
[looks at the others]
The Chechen: He was right. We have to fix real problems: Batman.
[They don't see Gordon enter]
Lt. James Gordon: Ah our boy looks good on the tube.
Salvatore Maroni: You sure you want to embarrass me in front of my friends, Lieutenant?
Lt. James Gordon: Don't worry. They're coming too.
[Other cops enter and arrest the mobsters in the restaurant. Cuts to various locations in Gotham City, as the police do a massive round up of the mobsters in town. We see Stephens loading one thug into a police car, underneath an 'L' line, saying]
Detective Stephens: Have a nice trip. See you next fall.
[cuts to a courtroom, where Judge Surillo is reading the massive charges]
Judge Surrillo: 747 counts of extortion, 849 counts of racketeering, 246 counts of fraud, 87 counts of conspiracy to murder...
[as she flips through the documents, she finds a Joker playing card]
Judge Surrillo: ... 527 counts of obstruction of justice. How do the defendants plead?
[a massive army of defense lawyers start jostling and yelling all at once. The stenographer looks up, confused]
Judge Surrillo: Order! Order in the court!
[cut to the Mayor's office, where the Mayor is berating Harvey for his actions. Gordon and Commissioner Loeb are also present]
Mayor Anthony Garcia: 549 criminals at once. How did you convince Surillo to hear this farce?
Harvey Dent: She shares my enthusiasm for justice. After all, she is a judge.
Mayor Anthony Garcia: Well even if you're able to blow enough smoke to get convictions out of Surillo, you're going to set a new record at appeals for quickest kick in the ass.
Harvey Dent: It won't matter. The head guys make bail, sure... but the mid-level guys, they can't, and they can't afford to be off the streets long enough for trial and appeal. They'll cut deals that include *some* jail time. Think of all you could do with 18 months of clean streets.
[the Mayor waves Gordon and Commissioner Loeb out]
Mayor Anthony Garcia: The public likes you, Dent. That's the *only* reason this might fly. But that means it's on you. They're all coming after you now. Not just the mob: politicians, journalists, cops. Anyone whose wallet's about to get lighter. Are you up to it?
[Dent smiles]
Mayor Anthony Garcia: You better be. They get anything back on you, those criminals will be back on the streets...
[he walks over to the window and looks out]
Mayor Anthony Garcia: Followed swiftly by you and me.
[a dead Batman wanna-be in Joker makeup, with the sides of his mouth sliced into a grin, bangs into the window, causing the mayor to jump. Police lower the dead body, which is hanging from a noose, and they find a Joker card that says "WILL THE REAL BATMAN PLEASE STAND UP?"]

Lau: [During a video conference with the gangsters] As you're all aware, one of our deposits were stolen. It was a relatively small amount: sixty million dollars.
The Chechen: Who's stupid enough to steal from us?
Salvatore Maroni: Some two-bit whack job. Wears a cheap purple suit and makeup. He's not the problem. The problem is our money being tracked by the cops.
Lau: Thanks to Mr. Maroni's well-placed sources, we know the police have indeed identified our banks using marked bills and are planning to seize your funds today. And since the enthusiastic new DA has put all my competitors out of business, I'm your only option.
The Chechen: What do you propose?
Lau: Moving all secure deposits to one location, not a bank.
Gambol: Where then?
Lau: No one can know but me. If the police were to gain leverage over one of you, then everyone's money would be at stake.
The Chechen: What will stop them from getting to you?
Lau: I'll go to Hong Kong, far from Dent's jurisdiction, and the Chinese will not extradite one of their own.
Salvatore Maroni: How soon can you move the money?
Lau: I already have.


"Gotham: Penguin's Umbrella (#1.7)" (2014)
Sal Maroni: Penguin! Come on out here. Don't be scared. She won't bite.
[to Fish]
Sal Maroni: You won't bite him, will you?

Oswald Cobblepot: Why do they want me back so badly?
Sal Maroni: I know why. Because they know I got a stone moneymaker here. A golden goose. They know it, and they don't want us to have him. Right, Penguin?
Oswald Cobblepot: Honk, honk.
Sal Maroni: What?
Oswald Cobblepot: Honk, honk. It's what geese say.
Sal Maroni: Oh, right, right. Honk, honk.
Frankie Carbone: So, fine, we got a goose.

Sal Maroni: Um, I heard Vic Zzasz tore up the GCPD, tracking down Gordon. Did you catch him yet?
Carmine Falcone: We're working on it.
Sal Maroni: Well, good luck with that. There's nothing more dangerous than an honest man, huh?


"Gotham: The Fearsome Dr. Crane (#1.14)" (2015)
[first lines]
Sal Maroni: [popping champagne cork] Ah. You're sure, now? Fish Mooney is done.
Oswald Cobblepot: She tried to bring down Falcone. She failed. Last time I saw her, Victor Zsasz had her cornered. We can assume she's either dead or extremely unwell.
Sal Maroni: Well, then. Salud.
[downs some champagne]
Sal Maroni: Mmm.
Sal Maroni: You know, this creates some intriguing opportunities. Falcone will struggle to hold on to her territories. If we move quickly...
Oswald Cobblepot: My thinking exactly. In fact, I took the liberty of claiming her nightclub. In your name, of course.
Sal Maroni: You did, huh? Good thinking. A bird in the hand is nine-tenths of the law, right?

Sal Maroni: Your turn. Tell me another secret. A good one this time.
Oswald Cobblepot: I took your gun. I have it right here.
Sal Maroni: That's a good secret.


"Gotham: Rogues' Gallery (#1.11)" (2015)
Sal Maroni: [to Oswald] You're a smart monkey. But you're a monkey. And I'm the Zookeeper.


"Gotham: The Scarecrow (#1.15)" (2015)
Oswald Cobblepot: Don Maroni. It's such a pleasure to see you.
Sal Maroni: Look at you. From the trunk of my car to running your own club.