Marty Funkhouser
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Quotes for
Marty Funkhouser (Character)
from "Curb Your Enthusiasm" (2000)

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"Curb Your Enthusiasm: Palestinian Chicken (#8.3)" (2011)
Marty Funkhouser: [Marty is meeting Larry and Jeff at the Palestinian chicken restaurant] You know, I thought all last night, 'If Rabin can break bread with Arafat, I can have chicken at this antisemitic shithole.'

Marty Funkhouser: [expressing astonishment after meeting Larry David and Shara just after they had very loud sex] Fuck me, Jew bastard?
Larry David: Yeah. Small price to pay for the best sex I've ever had, anywhere! This woman is amazing.
Marty Funkhouser: When did your orgasm? When she said she'd fuck the Jew out of you?
Larry David: Hey, let me tell you something. The penis doesn't care about race, creed and color. The penis wants to get to his homeland. It wants to go home!


"Curb Your Enthusiasm: The Bowtie (#5.2)" (2005)
Larry David: [about Lesbians] I'm their biggest supporter!
Marty Funkhouser: You're their biggest supporter?
Larry David: Yeah.
Marty Funkhouser: Well, then they're in a lot of trouble.