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Quotes for
Victor Sifuentes (Character)
from "L.A. Law" (1986)

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"L.A. Law: Hand Roll Express (#2.12)" (1988)
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Jonathan, McMurray vs. Brinkley.
Jonathan Rollins: Uh, $185,000 award plus costs.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: That brings Mr. Rollins to 5 and 0. I'd like to see those kind of stats from some other people around here. Seidell tax audits?
Stuart Markowitz: Yeah, I'm not going to have anything definitive on that until Friday.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Emile's vs. Southland Magazine.
Victor Sifuentes: Opening arguments scheduled for today.
Abby Perkins: Your case may be a editorial section of the L.A. Times today.
Jonathan Rollins: I never would've thought a restaurant review could generate this kind of controversy.
Stuart Markowitz: Are you kidding? Lorna Landsberg - Who by the way I'd love to meet sometime if you could.
[Victor nodded]
Stuart Markowitz: She's probably the most influential food critic around. She makes and breaks restaurant.
Victor Sifuentes: More importantly this is potentially a landmark First Amendment case. The same elements that were in Westmoreland vs. CBS, Tavoulareas vs. the Washington Post, Sharon vs. Time Magazine. They're all there. It is the kind of case that makes laws.
Michael Kuzak: Immortality, Victor. Nothing less.
Leland McKenzie: It's a serious issue though, if you don't have a free press if they're cowered by fear of being sued.
Arnie Becker: Yeah, but on the other hand, is the press entitled to be malicious if it means this guy with the restaurant suffers.
[Leland shrugged]
Michael Kuzak: Was H.L. Mencken malicious? Lincoln Steffens, was he malicious? If you don't like someone's opinion, it's easy to call him malicious.
Stuart Markowitz: Yeah, and there's something else really important to consider here. We now have a client who knows Spago's private number. We'll never be shut out a table there again.
[Ann laughs. Jonathan laughs, too]
Arnie Becker: Could you find out for me, Victor, if she knows of a restaurant that's serving Chinese food from the Hakka region? I think that this might be the next big cuisine.
[Abby and Stuart laughing]

Attorney: The defense will likely say that the issue here is freedom of the press. But the evidence will demonstrate, it's not. Now we don't mean to suggest that food critics should not be allowed to review restaurants or to print their honest impressions. First Amendment guarantees that right. What it does not guarantee is the right to publish a malicious series of lies. That woman right over there, Lorna Landsberg, attacked this restaurant, vilified it's chef, with no regard for the truth whatsoever. This isn't Freedom of Speech. It's libel. It's slander. And they might want you to get up and wave the flag and sing a few bars of God Blessed America. That's fine, but what she did was not patriotic. It was reprehensible, and people got hurt... seriously hurt.
[Followed by Victor Sifuentes who will make an opening statement]
Victor Sifuentes: You can believe him when he says that the food critic said some nasty things. You can believe him when he tells you that the restaurant has been losing money lately, but when he stands here and tells you that this case is not about Freedom of the Press, don't you dare swallow that. The facts will show that she published her opinion, and they're suing 'cause the words were too harsh. Now I don't care what kind of label they hang on it, they're chasing her because they don't like what she says. And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, goes to the very essence of the First Amendment. Believe me, people, you may think that a magazine restaurant review isn't all that important in the scheme of things. And if this case we're solely about the relative merits of their salad dressing and their beignet sauce, then I would be in complete agreeing with you. But it is not. It is about a right that is fundamental to the Constitution, to democracy, and to every single of you. They're actually asking you to punish the magazine for the expression of an opinion. My God, what a dangerous, dangerous request. Please don't even consider granting it.

Lorna Landsberg: Brilliant. You were absolutely brilliant.
Victor Sifuentes: Thanks. Just doing my job.
Lorna Landsberg: Maybe you think of it as only doing your job, but that opening? Well, it reminded me that journalistic integrity is at stake here. Hmm... Here, try my pulpo.
Victor Sifuentes: Oh, no. No, thanks. You know, the fact is the stakes are much higher than journalistic integrity. We're talking about Freedom of Expression here, and that affects everyone.
Lorna Landsberg: In that vein, Victor, I hope that I can feel free in expressing my personal attraction toward you.
Victor Sifuentes: Excuse me?
Lorna Landsberg: I don't mean to embarrass you. It's just that I'm a sucker for a man who's big on principle. Do you mind?
[Lorna will take a taste of Victor's food]
Lorna Landsberg: There is nothing like a good oil drizzled over warm chevre.
Victor Sifuentes: Lorna, I'm flattered, but you do understand that the point of this dinner is to go over your testimony.
Lorna Landsberg: I understand the substance of my testimony completely. They can't win unless they prove malice.
Victor Sifuentes: Right.
Lorna Landsberg: I'm therefore to appear passive and sympathetic without the slightest hint of hostility. Any further objections?
Victor Sifuentes: Look, Lorna, this is probably the biggest trial I've ever had, at least in terms of overall significance. I don't want to be distracted.
Lorna Landsberg: I've never known a man to become distracted with me, counselor...
[Lorna eating the piece of celery]
Lorna Landsberg: ever.
Victor Sifuentes: All right. Well, let's just say that my luck with women hasn't been all that great... lately.
Lorna Landsberg: Why not give me a chance? I guarantee you can get very lucky with me.
Victor Sifuentes: No, no. You are a client, Lorna. House rules.

Victor Sifuentes: The function of a food critic into sample the food and say what he thinks, isn't that right?
Geoffrey Bowers: There's a big difference between saying what you think and an unmitigated attack.
Victor Sifuentes: Uh, I see. Well, perhaps when I can quote one of your review s to illustrate exactly where that line lies. Regarding Pitman's Restaurant, "The sewage they call clam broth will induce you to vomit. But don't, management will scoop it up and proffer it to the next patron as pea soup."
Geoffrey Bowers: Pitman's was an unsanitary restaurant. Every critic said the same thing.
Victor Sifuentes: Are you saying that if every other critic loved Putnam's, you wouldn't have printed your opinion?
Geoffrey Bowers: Certainly not. I expressed my opinion regardless of what others think.
Victor Sifuentes: And why shouldn't Ms. Landsberg do he same thing?
Geoffrey Bowers: She should, but... Her opinion stinks.
Victor Sifuentes: So as I understand it, sir, while you disagree with the content of Miss Landsberg's opinion, you fully support her decision to publish it?
Geoffrey Bowers: Yes. That's right.
Victor Sifuentes: Thank you, sir. I've nothing further.

Victor Sifuentes: Now you have reviewed Emile's several times in the past. Isn't that true, Miss Landsberg?
Lorna Landsberg: Yes.
Victor Sifuentes: Why do you review a restaurant more than once?
Lorna Landsberg: Well, they change. Improvements need to be recognized... As does decline.
Victor Sifuentes: And could you summarize your most recent impressions for the court?
Lorna Landsberg: The food was disgustingly file. It wasn't an affront.
Victor Sifuentes: Hold on. I would like you to calmly tell us your specific criticisms of the food and service.
Lorna Landsberg: I actually found the service to be quite acceptable. The problem was the incompetence of the chef.
Chef: I object to that!
Judge Hilary Johnson: Order.
Chef: I happened to be the chef at the meals.
Judge Hilary Johnson: I don't care who...
Lorna Landsberg: You're the one who should be on trial.
Judge Hilary Johnson: Quiet please.
Chef: I was sous chef under Stefan de Sueza. I have worked in three-star restaurans thoughout Europe!
Judge Hilary Johnson: I don't care who you are! You're disrupting this court. And if you don't return to your seat, I'll hold you in contempt.
Chef: Unbelievable.

Judge Hilary Johnson: Proceed, counselor.
Victor Sifuentes: Thank you, Your Honor. It was your opinion then, ma'am, that the work of the chef was substandard?
Lorna Landsberg: As a food critic, one of the things that I look for is how the style or the personality of the chef is reflected in the culinary product. What I tasted here was a total lack of commitment. I tasted fraud. I tasted impotence.
Chef: [Protesting] How can you do this to me?
Judge Hilary Johnson: Have that man removed.
Chef: She's lying!
Lorna Landsberg: You're completely disgrace. It's my Constitution right to say so.
Judge Hilary Johnson: Order.
Victor Sifuentes: Miss Landsberg.
Lorna Landsberg: You're a little toad.
Victor Sifuentes: Miss Landsberg.
Chef: [Caught by the bailiff] How can you do this?
Lorna Landsberg: A puny man!
Victor Sifuentes: Miss Landsberg!
Judge Hilary Johnson: Sit down, Miss Landsberg.
Chef: [Remove out of the courtroom] It's not true!
Judge Hilary Johnson: I'll ask you to control your witness.
Victor Sifuentes: Your Honor, can I have a short recess to, uh, confer with the witness?
Judge Hilary Johnson: Yes, you may.

[Stormed out of the courtroom]
Victor Sifuentes: What do you think you're doing?
Lorna Landsberg: Just stating my opinion you asked.
Victor Sifuentes: I told you not to sound vindictive or mean-spirited and you deliberately just did that.
Lorna Landsberg: Whatever happened to free speech, Mr. First Amendment?
Victor Sifuentes: Look, I am trying to win a lawsuit here, which I'll not do if you're up there showing malice.
[Turning behind the window]
Victor Sifuentes: Can I help you?
Chef: Hasn't this gone far enough?
Lorna Landsberg: Please, get that man out of here.
Chef: I'm leaving her, Lorna. I'm getting divorce just like I promised.
Victor Sifuentes: What the hell is this?
Chef: I know how much I must have hurt you. Forgive me, I beg you.
Victor Sifuentes: Oh, my God.
Chef: I still love you. I miss your passion, Lorna, your fire. You devour my tete de veau like no woman in the world.
Victor Sifuentes: That's what this is about?
[the chef turned to Sifuentes]
Victor Sifuentes: A jilted lover punishing her boyfriend with a bad review?

Lorna Landsberg: You're really gonna tell your wife?
Chef: Everything, including the fact that I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Lorna Landsberg: Let's get out of here, right now.
[Lorna changed her mind]
Lorna Landsberg: Oh, Victor, I'm quitting this thing. You tell...
Victor Sifuentes: Oh, no. This is a test case, for God's sakes. You don't quit a trial on the Bill of Rights!
Lorna Landsberg: I do.
Victor Sifuentes: You quit and the magazine will lose and they will get full indemnity from you.
Lorna Landsberg: Won't happen. You tell them that I'll retract the review and write a new one. And I will also publish a four-part series on the food critic who fell in love and ran off with the chef.
[the Chef kissed Lorna's hand]
Lorna Landsberg: That restaurant will be more popular, more trendy, and more lucrative than anybody's wildest dreams.
Victor Sifuentes: That won't work. It just won't work.
Lorna Landsberg: You'll make it work. Victor, this is the kind of stuff that makes a Hollywood Restaurant. I'm offering them more positive exposure than they could with a thousand reviews. You just ask them. They'll jump.
[to the Chef]
Lorna Landsberg: Let's go.
Chef: My darling.
[Lorna Landsberg takes the Chef and leave. Victor Sifuentes is staying alone in the witness room]


"L.A. Law: Raiders of the Lost Bark (#1.7)" (1986)
Michael Kuzak: [choosing stakes for a bet] You can pick anything you want.
Victor Sifuentes: Ok... your leather chair.
Michael Kuzak: Except that.

Erica Tuckman: Erica Tuckman for the plaintiff. Ready, Your Honor.
Victor Sifuentes: Uh, Victor Sifuentes for the defendant. Your Honor, the defense will be requesting a continuance at this time due to the unavailability of defendant's counsel Michael Kuzak. Uh, Mr. Kuzak is in trial in the Superior Court, and I will therefore be seeking a stay of this action until the conclusion of that proceeding.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Both Counselors step forward.
[Victor Sifuentes and Erica Tuckman approached the sidebar is the Honorable Judge Douglas M. McGrath]
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: I'm chagrined. Now, you have stalled, dragged, and burden this matter with every dilatory measure known to mankind, and I don't like lawyers who clog the system just to put off paying a judgment.
Victor Sifuentes: Your Honor, I appreciate your senses of...
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Don't yank me. This case was marked, uh, no further continuances, and the honorable Mr. Kuzak knew it. And if he thinks this stunt of sending in an unprepared attorney is gonna buy him another minute, he's very wrong.
Victor Sifuentes: Well, what can I do, Judge? I don't know the case.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Then learn it, because we're going to trial right now.
Victor Sifuentes: With all due respect, Your Honor, that would be a travesty of justice. You'd be forcing the defendant to proceed...
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: You have two answers, counselor. Default judgment for plaintiff or ready for trial.
Victor Sifuentes: [sigh] Ready for trial.

Erica Tuckman: And calling your attention to the morning of June 6, 1985, did you then have occasion to see the animal?
Upton Weeks: Yes, I did. I was manicuring my shrubs, one of which was turning yellow, 'cause it whittled on it.
Victor Sifuentes: Objection to the term "it".
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Overruled.
Victor Sifuentes: Cockapoo.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: I beg your pardon?
Victor Sifuentes: It is a full-bred cockapoo.

Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Continue.
Erica Tuckman: Could you tell us then, Mr. Weeks, what happened next? Victor Sifuentes: Yes, sir.
Upton Weeks: Well, I said to him, "See what you did?" These plants are my passions, my family really. "See what you did?," I said. Then the little mutt mauled me.
Victor Sifuentes: Objection to the term "mutt."
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Counselor!
Victor Sifuentes: It is not an it or a mutt. He's a pet, and just because you hate animals doesn't...
Upton Weeks: I didn't say I hated...
Victor Sifuentes: Tell the jury what you do to cats.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Mr. Sifuentes.
Victor Sifuentes: I'm sorry, Judge, but I have no tolerance for animal abuse.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Mr. Sifuentes!
Erica Tuckman: Hey!
Victor Sifuentes: Maybe you can sit by and watch vindictive eccentrics. beat up on helpless little puppies...
Erica Tuckman: Oh, for God's sake!
Victor Sifuentes: Your Honor, please...
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Get up here now!
[Mr.Sifuentes approach the bench and he's being clever with Judge McGrath]
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: I know your game, cowboy. You want a mistrial so you can buy more time. Well, you're not gonna get it. What you will get is sanctions. What you will get is contempt. What you will get is a directed verdict for the plaintiff. Now you step back and act like a lawyer, big shot, or you're gonna lose this case right now.
Victor Sifuentes: Yes, sir.

Erica Tuckman: Now then, Mr. Weeks, getting back to the day the dog bit you.
Victor Sifuentes: Objection to the term "bit." I'm sorry, Your Honor, but the medical records indicate a nip.
Upton Weeks: A nip? A was a vicious bite.
Victor Sifuentes: You're a liar!
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: I'm warning you!
Erica Tuckman: Objection!
Victor Sifuentes: A dog beater and a liar, too.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: In my chambers, now! Jury is excused till 1 P.M. Move it!
[Mrs. Tuckman and Mr. Sifuentes heads to the chambers of Judge McGrath and jury takes a break until 1 P.M. They'll settle with Upton Weeks later]

Victor Sifuentes: You left me no choice.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: Do you think I won't order a verdict for the plaintiff? You think I won't?
Victor Sifuentes: With all due respect, if you direct a verdict before I even present my case after already forcing an unprepared attorney to go forward, I'm gonna have automatic grounds for an appeal and you know it.
Judge Douglas M. McGrath: You want it? Just ask for it.
Victor Sifuentes: Go ahead, take it. I love it. Face it, the only way your guy can be a real winner is to win this trial on the merits right here. On the other hand, if you think I've got you, take the directed verdict. You'll lose money but at least to save face.
[What did Mrs. Tuckman say]
Erica Tuckman: No DV. No mistrial, Your Honor.
[Forget it]
Erica Tuckman: Let's go back in there.
[Good idea. Mr. Sifuentes will like the sound of that]


"L.A. Law: Dummy Dearest (#3.6)" (1988)
Richard Mathers: Kuzak.
Michael Kuzak: What are you doing here?
Richard Mathers: I thought I'd lend you my support.
Michael Kuzak: In exchange for what?
Richard Mathers: You doing the same. I testify for you, you testify for me. Very symmetrical, no?
Michael Kuzak: No.
[Mr. Mathers talking with Mr. Sifuentes]
Richard Mathers: He'd be helping me out.
Victor Sifuentes: Hey, don't look at me.
Richard Mathers: Mike.
Michael Kuzak: I'm sorry, but I don't want you to be my witness, and I certainly don't want to be yours.
Richard Mathers: The first part of that is up to you. The second part's up to me.
[Mr. Mathers handing over the subpoena to Mr. Kuzak]
Richard Mathers: Here's your subpoena. If you can get there by 10:00, that would be great.
[Mr. Kuzak will take care of that]

Elliott Oppenheim: As the evidence clearly has established, Michael Kuzak violated Disciplinary Rule 3101 in aiding the unauthorized practice of law.
Victor Sifuentes: If the Committee, please... In order to assess Mr. Kuzak's ethical conduct, I believe it first necessary to appreciate the circumstances under which it occurred.
Judge Donald Tytell: In other words, you got an excuse.
Victor Sifuentes: The discovery that Richard Mathers was unlicensed to practice law came more than halfway through the trial.
Ralph DeSuvio: The issue here is that the court didn't learn of it until after the verdict and then from only Mr. Mathers himself.
Victor Sifuentes: If you could just stand back from the code for one moment, I think that you'll see that the only motivation here was a fair settlement.
Judge Constance Gregg: [Judge Gregg takes off her classes] We don't stand back from the code, Mr. Sifuentes. We enforce it.
Victor Sifuentes: I understand that, ma'am.
Judge Constance Gregg: Furthermore, this isn't some nitpicking technical violation we're talking about.
[Judge Gregg looking up this file]
Judge Constance Gregg: These charges indicate conduct indirect violation of a lawyer's obligation as an officer of the court.
Victor Sifuentes: All Mike Kuzak did was try to avoid having Richard Mathers' fraud force his clients into protracted litigation at considerable further expense.
Judge Donald Tytell: That's not the concern of this Committee.
Michael Kuzak: Well, with all due respect, maybe it should be.
Victor Sifuentes: Mike.
Michael Kuzak: [Kuzak has something to say. Judge Tytell listening] If the only question here is did I or did I not violate the code, let's stop wasting each others' time. I did. But you only talk about a lawyer's obligation as an officer of the court. What about my obligation to my client?
Elliott Oppenheim: Your first loyalty is to the legal system.
Victor Sifuentes: The purpose of which is to administer justice. Richard Mathers was a highly skilled practitioner. There's no argument about that. Mr. Kuzak and he went head to head. Both clients received skilled, uncompromised representation. Tell me what that is if not justice.

Judge Constance Gregg: Mr. Sifuentes, do you have anything to say before we render our decision?
Victor Sifuentes: Only that has never been our intention to minimize the importance of ethical standards. I've simply tried to make the Committee aware of the difficulty of Mr. Kuzak's situation. Now, Mike's record both as a prosecutor and in private practice has been exemplary. I was just hope that his action be taken in context.
Judge Constance Gregg: Mr. Kuzak, your Counsel has argued that the action of Richard Mathers justify your own. Doesn't work that way. What he did constitutes fraud. What you did constitutes devious and unethical behavior. Utterly at odds with our code of conduct. Now, since Mr. Mathers isn't an attorney, he is beyond the limits of our authority. You, sir, are not. We are your peers. We speak for our profession, and we condemn what you did. Our recommendation to the State Bar Association is that you be publicly censured and suspended from the practice of law for a period of not less than one month, effective immediately.
Michael Kuzak: [Kuzak in shock] A month?
Judge Constance Gregg: Yes.
Judge Donald Tytell: That's right, Mr. Kuzak. A month.
Michael Kuzak: Well, I'm going sleep a lot better. Knowing that the Members of this Committee are there to pass it out pronouncements on the correctness of my conduct, especially when they don't allow themselves to be distracted by the specifics of the situation.
Judge Constance Gregg: If your contempt for the Committee as any indication, sir, I fully expect this will not be the last time we'll be seeing you.

Michael Kuzak: We're going to fight this out with the Bar Association in court. Let's see how smug these fat-assed Rotarians are after they've gone a few rounds with a litigator.
Victor Sifuentes: No.
Michael Kuzak: What do you mean "no"?
Victor Sifuentes: Bottom line: You broke the rules, Mike. We tried to put the best face on it that we could and this is the way it came down.
Michael Kuzak: What are you saying? You think that they're right?
Victor Sifuentes: Yeah. And if you want my recommendation both as your friend and as your lawyer right now, I'm gonna tell you to take your medicine and be glad it's not worse.


"L.A. Law: The Plane Mutiny (#3.10)" (1989)
Grace Van Owen: Well, who was it that call you, Mr. Dunham?
John Dunham: The contact was a man named Willie Kosar. The information was that he wanna me to kill Mrs. Joseph Schaeffer.
Grace Van Owen: What exactly did Mr. Kosar tell you, sir?
John Dunham: He said the woman's husband wanted...
Victor Sifuentes: Objection. Hearsay.
Grace Van Owen: Goes to show state of mind that the deal was being made, Your Honor.
Victor Sifuentes: It doesn't matter. It's totem pole. She's asking the witness to tell her what Mr. Kosar told him about what my client told Mr. Kosar.
Judge Jonathan Cramer: I'm overruling the objection.
Victor Sifuentes: Exception.
Judge Jonathan Cramer: Noted.
Grace Van Owen: I'll ask you again, Mr. Dunham. What did Mr. Kosar tell you?
John Dunham: He said Schaeffer would pay $10,000 to have his wife killed.
Grace Van Owen: And you accepted?
John Dunham: I accepted.
Grace Van Owen: Thank you, sir. I have nothing further.

Victor Sifuentes: You never killed Mrs. Schaeffer, did you?
John Dunham: No, I didn't.
Victor Sifuentes: Because in fact Willie Kosar called you back and told you to cancel it. Isn't that right?
John Dunham: That's not right. I just decided to tell the police about it.
Victor Sifuentes: You just decided to tell the police, and this sudden attack of candor occurred after you were arrested on racketeering charges, didn't it?
John Dunham: I made a deal. So what?
Victor Sifuentes: Yeah, you made a deal. You made a great deal. You give them a murder conspiracy in exchange for total immunity in all racketeering charges against you dropped.
John Dunham: What's the point?
Victor Sifuentes: The point is you were looking at 12 years minimum, and since you had to give the police something to avoid growing all the fact, would you decided given this murder conspiracy leaving out the part of how Kosar cancelled it.
John Dunham: That didn't happen. Your client's guilty.
Victor Sifuentes: Because you say so, right? Tell me, Mr. Dunham, you murder people for a living?
John Dunham: I refused to answer that on the grounds it'll might incriminate me.
Victor Sifuentes: Oh, I'm sorry, we wouldn't want anything to incriminate you. Nothing further.
Judge Jonathan Cramer: You can step down, Mr. Dunham.
Victor Sifuentes: Uh, Your Honor, I'd like to request a sidebar.
Judge Jonathan Cramer: We're done for the morning. I will seek counsel in my chambers.

Victor Sifuentes: Your Honor, I'd like to move that Ms. Van Owen be disqualified from this trial.
Grace Van Owen: What?
Judge Jonathan Cramer: On what grounds?
Victor Sifuentes: Conflicts-of-Interest, Judge, she personally involved with a member of my firm, and I...
Grace Van Owen: Give me a break.
Victor Sifuentes: I didn't think you would pose any conflicts, Your Honor, but I have just learned that Ms. Van Owen has had communications with Mr. Kuzak regarding this case, and I think the interest of justice here...
Grace Van Owen: I've had no significant communications with Mr. Kuzak concerning this matter, Judge. And Mr. Sifuentes has been fully aware of this relationship long before he took this case. He's simply brought up this motion now so that he could buy extra time while he continues his manhunt for Willie Kosar.
Judge Jonathan Cramer: Your motion is denied, Mr. Sifuentes.
Victor Sifuentes: In the alternative then, Your Honor, I would like some time to look for Mr. Kosar, his testimony is certainly vital...
Grace Van Owen: There is no reasonable expectation that he will ever be found. We've looked for him, too, Judge, he's gone.
Judge Jonathan Cramer: Do you know where he is, counselor?
Victor Sifuentes: No, Your Honor, but I think with a little bit of time...
Judge Jonathan Cramer: Motion denied. See you at 2:00.
[Grace and Victor leaving the Chambers, but Victor have some explanation]
Victor Sifuentes: Your Honor...
Judge Jonathan Cramer: That's all.
[And Grace and Victor exited the Chamber of Judge Jonathan Cramer]
Grace Van Owen: Victor. Victor, you surprised me.
Victor Sifuentes: Hey, it was worth the shot.
[Typewriter sound]


"L.A. Law: Bang... Zoom... Zap (#4.19)" (1990)
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: All right, Rosalind. I noticed you open up an account from Nosted Company. Is this a potential new client?
Rosalind Shays: Just some introductory talks, we don't have go through it here.
Victor Sifuentes: Excuse me. Nosted, the Liquor Company?
Victor Sifuentes: Let's move on.
Victor Sifuentes: No, no. Is Nosted going to become a client here?
Rosalind Shays: I've just opened some dialog, that's all.
Victor Sifuentes: Like hell.
Leland McKenzie: Victor.

Victor Sifuentes: We had a client who was in litigation with this firm last week. And Rosalind goes behind my back, and she convinces the client to accept the settlement offer which was way too low.
Rosalind Shays: It wasn't low.
Victor Sifuentes: It was low!
[sighs]
Victor Sifuentes: And certainly Nosted is now coming to us for presentation?
Rosalind Shays: What are you saying, Victor?
Victor Sifuentes: What am I saying? I'm saying you were bought, Rosalind, I'm saying you sold out our clients.
Rosalind Shays: How dare you!
Leland McKenzie: Victor!
Victor Sifuentes: Oh, please, don't give me this how dare you crap, okay?
Leland McKenzie: Victor, that's enough!
Victor Sifuentes: No, it's not enough. You - you really think you can get away with this?
Leland McKenzie: Sit down, Victor!
[Victor is leaving]
Leland McKenzie: There's no reason for you to be talking like this!
Victor Sifuentes: I'm gonna recommend to the client that she sue this firm for malpractice. I'm gonna recommend to Jimmy Hoffs that he's sue us for interference with contract!
Rosalind Shays: You do that, you're fired!
[Nobody's gonna stop Victor Sifuentes when he's fired. Victor sighs]
Victor Sifuentes: I've known you for that. As soon as I finished up my trial next week. I quit.

Leland McKenzie: [Closed the door] Do you know for a fact she made a deal with Nosted to sellout your client?
Victor Sifuentes: You figured out, Leland.
Leland McKenzie: Do you know for a fact?
Victor Sifuentes: You mean I can prove it?
[sighs]
Victor Sifuentes: No. Never can with her, she's too damn good. But you can't hide what she is, Leland. I know what happened here! So do you.
Leland McKenzie: Let me look into it.
Victor Sifuentes: Yeah, you go ahead and check it out. I'm sure that's gonna be really big investigation.


"L.A. Law: Blood, Sweat and Fears (#4.15)" (1990)
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Proceeding along, Parral vs. Dayan. Victor?
Victor Sifuentes: Yes. The hospital has settled out, leaving just the good doctor. We offer 40,000, but they objective.
Jonathan Rollins: Isn't 40,000 a little low for wrongful death?
Victor Sifuentes: Well, the victim was terminal anyway, Jonathan, so the damage claims a little weak. Start today.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Keep us surprised. People vs. Earl Williams. For no masse.
Michael Kuzak: Motion to dismissed Wednesday.
Leland McKenzie: A chance of getting this kicked?
Michael Kuzak: Slim. But Pinto has been seen in the PI's, I'm working with expect to find him.
Leland McKenzie: And then?
Michael Kuzak: I question him. Which reminds me, if I did find the guy, and I need somebody to be there with me when I talk to him. I may need an impeachment witness down the road.
[Victor can't. He got his own case. Jonathan will help]
Jonathan Rollins: I can do it.
Michael Kuzak: Good.

Victor Sifuentes: How did your husband contract AIDS, ma'am?
Susan Parral: He had an accident at work about 6 years ago when he received a blood transfusion that was contaminated.
Victor Sifuentes: And he was being treated for this disease?
Susan Parral: He was getting treatment. It wasn't effective.
Victor Sifuentes: Your husband was dying?
Susan Parral: Yes, he was.
Victor Sifuentes: Um... I'm sorry, ma'am, but could you tell us how long the doctors had given him to live?
Susan Parral: They said he probably wouldn't make it through this summer.
Victor Sifuentes: And was your husband employed at the time of his death?
Susan Parral: No. He hadn't worked since last October.
Victor Sifuentes: Thank you ma'am. I have nothing further, Your Honor.
Susan Parral: [bitterly] That doesn't mean he should be left to just die. Like you didn't matter...
Victor Sifuentes: Thank you, ma'am. There's no question before you.

Victor Sifuentes: Okay. 75,000.
Mark Gilliam: Uh, not a chance.
Victor Sifuentes: Come on, Mark, you can't show damages here. You had a 3-month life expectancy, no lost income. I'm throwing you a bone
Mark Gilliam: We're not going for wrongful death here, Victor, I'm going for hedonics. Loss of enjoyment of life.
Victor Sifuentes: How much enjoyment did he have coming into, Mark? He was a month away from his organs beginning to shut down. If anything this thing spared him tremendous suffering.
Mark Gilliam: Your guy cost Warren Parral the rest of his life. I'm not forgiving that for 75 grand. Sorry.
Victor Sifuentes: Are you gonna take this offer to your client, Mark?
Mark Gilliam: Yes, Victor, I'll tell her. And I'll tell her not to accept it.
Victor Sifuentes: You told her everything?
Mark Gilliam: Meaning what? Have I told her that I have AIDS?
Victor Sifuentes: Look, Mark, I'm sorry. I just don't want to see your judgment here crowded by your own personal situation.
Mark Gilliam: She knows about my situation, Victor. And she knows me to be an honest attorney who would never compromise his client's interest just to make a point even I'm dying.
Victor Sifuentes: I'm sorry, Mark. That was out of line.
Mark Gilliam: Your offer is rejected.


"L.A. Law: The Last Gasp (#4.22)" (1990)
Victor Sifuentes: And during the trial, evidence was introduced that my client had been a heavy user of methedrine for a period of more than 10 years.
Federal Judge Jackson: I hope you're not going to ask us to consider that a mitigating factor.
Victor Sifuentes: A recent doctoral thesis completed only last month on the long-term effects amphetamines makes it a mitigating factor, Your Honor.
Federal Judge Emmanuel: Five different psychiatrists were called to the stand. Everyone of them testified about the effects of long-term addiction to amphetamines.
Victor Sifuentes: Yes, but none of them knew about the results of this research.
Federal Judge Constance Gregg: With all due respect, counselor, this attempt seems a little desperate.
Victor Sifuentes: Your Honor, my client is scheduled to die tomorrow. I think an evaluation of this new evidence is warranted before you comment on its legitimacy.
Federal Judge Emmanuel: Let's do this without the attitude, counsel.
Victor Sifuentes: I mean no disrespect to the court. But I grew up with Hector Rodriguez, I know him personally which causes me to take this case personally.
Federal Judge Emmanuel: Well, don't. Your relationship with him has no relevance here.
Victor Sifuentes: My relationship with him puts me in a position to recognize his capacity for change and rehabilitation which is directly relevant to death penalty cases, Your Honor.
Federal Judge Constance Gregg: This is not an evidentiary hearing.
Victor Sifuentes: I knew Hector Rodriguez on drugs. I know him off drugs. He's off of them now, Your Honor.
Federal Judge Jackson: You're not a character witness, Mr. Sifuentes.
Victor Sifuentes: That's right, Your Honor. I am a lawyer. The three of you are judges. And we are all here to administer justice. Killing Hector Rodriguez doesn't accomplish that.
Federal Judge Constance Gregg: In your objective opinion.
Victor Sifuentes: I know him. None if you do. And I respectfully request that until you can be sure as I am, about all of this. Please don't let this man be killed. Please. Thank you, Your Honors.

Federal Judge Jackson: Mr. Keene?
State Attorney Allard Keene: Your Honors, there is absolutely no indication that this new evidence would have made any difference. The jury heard ad nauseam that Mr. Rodriguez was a user of methedrine.
Federal Judge Constance Gregg: Uh, Mr. Keene, excuse me.
[Judge Gregg takes off her glasses and speaks with Mr. Sifuentes]
Federal Judge Constance Gregg: Mr. Sifuentes, as compelling as your argument may have been, this study does not constitute substantial new evidence, and as we previously stated, your personal relationship with Hector Rodriguez is simply not relevant. Your application for an emergency stay is denied. You can try your luck with the Supreme Court, but we're not interfering with the execution.
Victor Sifuentes: You haven't seen the evidence yet, Your Honor...
Federal Judge Constance Gregg: Mr. Sifuentes, that's enough.
Victor Sifuentes: No, it's not enough. Look, I don't care how damn busy your schedules are.
Federal Judge Jackson: One more word, counselor, and you're in contempt.
Victor Sifuentes: He is off the drugs!
[Victor turned behind Norman]
Victor Sifuentes: 8 years now, he's been model prisoners...
Federal Judge Jackson: This court is adjourned.
[Norman Patton help Victor to chill out. Victor Sifuentes sits down. The people are leaving and the four reporters murmuring and questioning Mr. Sifuentes]

Norman Patton: I've got the whole issue briefed. New studies on long-term methyl green use, I've got it all documented. All you'd have to do is argue...
Victor Sifuentes: Norman. Why suddenly switch to me? You've been his lawyer the whole way. You...
Norman Patton: I didn't grow up with him. You did.
Victor Sifuentes: What difference does that make?
Norman Patton: It's an angle, Victor, that's all it is. But with Hector, 3 days away from the gas chamber, we got to use whatever we got.
Victor Sifuentes: Norman, the fact that I grew up with the guy has no relevance here whatsoever.
Norman Patton: If the methyl green argument doesn't work, it might. Our only shot maybe an emotional appeal from an old friend.
Victor Sifuentes: Yeah, but see that's just the point. I'm not his friend. I mean, I haven't seen him 15 years.
Mrs. Rodriguez, Hector's mother: How many times did you eat supper at my kitchen table, Victor? How many times did you sleep in one of my beds?
Victor Sifuentes: Mrs. Rodriguez, there was a long time ago.
Mrs. Rodriguez, Hector's mother: So you forget?
Victor Sifuentes: No, I don't forget. But... I just don't have a relationship with your son anymore.
Mrs. Rodriguez, Hector's mother: It's been 8 years since the killings. He was on the drugs then, but now he's more like the Hector that you used to know.
[Victor gets up from the chair]
Victor Sifuentes: I... I don't think I could be of help here. And I don't understand why you're asking me to do this. Norman is...
Mrs. Rodriguez, Hector's mother: I'm not asking. Hector is. If you want to say no, then say no. But do one thing for me, Victor, please. You tell him yourself.
[Victor can do that]


"L.A. Law: Justice Swerved (#4.17)" (1990)
Elizabeth Lafferty: I can't take this. This is just the beginning, Wayne, how are we ever get through this?
Wayne Lafferty: Because we will.
Victor Sifuentes: Look, I'm sorry, but you gotta have to get used to this. Press is gotta be here hounding us every day, it's only gotta get worse.
Lawyer John Trischuta: Don't even listen to that questions.
Elizabeth Lafferty: How can we not hear their questions? "Mrs. Lafferty, did you kill your baby? Mrs. Lafferty, who is the actual murderer, you or your husband?" How can I not hear those questions?
Victor Sifuentes: Look, Mrs. Lafferty, people are gonna think, but they gonna think, but by the end of the trial, we'll be okay.
Wayne Lafferty: Things will never be okay, Mr. Sifuentes. We haven't buried him yet, and they arrest us for murder.
Lawyer John Trischuta: Come on, Wayne.
Wayne Lafferty: Our friends look at us like they don't know us. They're not sure.
Lawyer John Trischuta: After the acquittal, they will be.
Wayne Lafferty: No, they won't.
[Wayne comforting his wife Elizabeth]
Wayne Lafferty: A little boy stays dead, no matter what. No matter what people are gonna think we did it.

D.A. Marcia Fusco: What made you first suspect foul play, Dr. Waibel?
Dr. Sam Waibel: Well, I notice when the baby was first bought in. It had an extensive bruises on his chest and neck.
D.A. Marcia Fusco: Which told you what?
Dr. Sam Waibel: He told me this baby was subjected to physical trauma. It suggested child abuse.
D.A. Marcia Fusco: And what else, Doctor?
Dr. Sam Waibel: Uh, the child also had conjunctivitis in his eyes, that's, uh, telltale sign of suffocation.
D.A. Marcia Fusco: Well, Mr. and Mrs. Lafferty claim that their little boy just stop breathing?
Dr. Sam Waibel: Well as the doctor who examine this child, I don't believe that. I think this baby was killed.
Lawyer John Trischuta: Move to strike.
Victor Sifuentes: Objection, no foundations, Your Honor.
Judge Walter L. Swanson: Sustained. The jury will disregard that last remark.
D.A. Marcia Fusco: Nothing further.

Victor Sifuentes: You've heard of sudden infant death syndrome, haven't you, Doctor?
Dr. Sam Waibel: Of course.
Victor Sifuentes: Of course. For the court, what is it, sir?
Dr. Sam Waibel: It's crib death. Uh, basically it's when it baby inexplicably just stops breathing and dies in it's sleep.
Victor Sifuentes: In fact, more babies have died of SIDS than from heart disease, cancer, cerebral palsy, and virtually all other diseases combined, isn't that right?
Dr. Sam Waibel: Yes.
Victor Sifuentes: And, Doctor, babies that died from sudden infant death syndrome are sometimes inaccurately diagnosis having been suffocated, aren't they?
Dr. Sam Waibel: It happens sometimes.
Victor Sifuentes: It happens so often that for death scene investigations that has been new legislation in California that requires police officers to take SIDS awareness training, right?
Dr. Sam Waibel: That's correct.
Victor Sifuentes: I'm going to show you statement that was made by State Senator Dan Boatwright.
[John hand in the statement to Victor]
Victor Sifuentes: Thank you, John. Are you familiar with this, sir?
Dr. Sam Waibel: Yep.
Victor Sifuentes: Could you read the last sentence on the first page here?
D.A. Marcia Fusco: Objection, hearsay.
Judge Walter L. Swanson: Overruled. I'll allow it. Read the line, please.
Dr. Sam Waibel: [Reading] "With our focus on child abuse, we have too many parents being treated as criminal suspects at the scene of the SIDS death."
Victor Sifuentes: Thank you, Doctor. Now, you say you saw bruises on the child's neck and chest area. Could these bruises have resulted from CPR attempts to revive the child?
Dr. Sam Waibel: I don't believe they were caused by that.
Victor Sifuentes: Is it possible, Doctor, that these bruises resulted from CPR attempts to save the baby after has stop breathing?
Dr. Sam Waibel: It's possible.
Victor Sifuentes: Thank you. Thank you, Doctor. I have nothing further.


"L.A. Law: Outward Bound (#4.21)" (1990)
Michael Kuzak: Yeah, well the defendant has freedom of the press on his side, what was published was true. So it's not liable. It's probably not invasion privacy either since my guy was a public figure.
Ann Kelsey: Which is why he was out in the first place.
Michael Kuzak: Right.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Well, a couple of queens get mad each other. Look out.
Michael Kuzak: These are not queens, Douglas, one is a cop, the other is a journalist. And they are both gays. But they're not queens.
[But guess who's here]
Gwen Taylor: Mr. Becker?
Arnie Becker: Yep.
Gwen Taylor: I'm sorry to interrupt, but lease decker's on the phone wants to know if she can come in at 3:00.
Arnie Becker: Yeah, sure.
Gwen Taylor: Okay.
Victor Sifuentes: Who is?
Arnie Becker: Oh, Roxanne's working half days this week, she needs some more time to tint to her father, so, uh, Gwen is filling in for...
Victor Sifuentes: Gwen.
Leland McKenzie: Is there anything else we can cover?
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Actually, that's it.
Michael Kuzak: Uh, just a second. It's no secret that I have been interviewing with the Wall Street Firm. I've decided to go back to New York. My father has cancer, and the doctors give him a year so to live. I'd like to give him a year also myself. I'm sorry.
[Michael will be going]

Alice Hackett: Hi, Benny.
Benny Stulwicz: [Benny turned is Alice] What are you doing here?
Alice Hackett: I came to visit. You want to come to a movie tonight?
Benny Stulwicz: No.
Alice Hackett: I want to.
Benny Stulwicz: Go with Harold.
Alice Hackett: I don't want to go with Harold. I want to go with you.
Benny Stulwicz: I'm busy now.
Alice Hackett: You're mad at me?
Benny Stulwicz: Go with Harold. You kissed him that means you like him.
Alice Hackett: You like him, too?
Benny Stulwicz: Well, how about sex? Are gonna have sex with him?
Alice Hackett: No.
Benny Stulwicz: Well, you're... you like to kiss him. Go on. Have sex with him.
Alice Hackett: I'm only want to do that with you.
Benny Stulwicz: Get away!
[Benny pushed and knocking Alice down on the floor]
Victor Sifuentes: Hey! Benny! Are you okay? Alice, you're all right? What do you think you're doing? You're okay?
[Victor find out what happened. Benny scared Alice and then she leave. Victor turned to Benny]
Victor Sifuentes: Benny, don't you ever knock her down like that again! Don't ever do that, okay?
Benny Stulwicz: She kiss Scarecrow on the leg!
Victor Sifuentes: I don't care, Benny! Don't ever go knocking her down like that!
[Benny was scolded, hurting his feelings and walk away for help, but Victor want to stop Benny]
Victor Sifuentes: Benny?


"L.A. Law: The Pay's Lousy, But the Tips Are Great (#4.10)" (1990)
Victor Sifuentes: [Victor is back and find out where does Allison going] You're going out?
Allison Gottlieb: Yeah, I'm having dinner with Melanie.
Victor Sifuentes: Like that?
Allison Gottlieb: Like what?
Victor Sifuentes: You just seem a little dressed up, that's all.
Allison Gottlieb: Just so happens that this is the first time in 2 weeks that I'm going out on a non rape related activity. And I would like to take off the sackcloth. So what's your point, Victor?
Victor Sifuentes: There's no point, Honey.
Allison Gottlieb: No?
Victor Sifuentes: No.
Allison Gottlieb: You bastard!
Victor Sifuentes: Ah, here we go again. Everything I do or say.
Allison Gottlieb: You think I asked for it, don't you?
Victor Sifuentes: I do not think you ask for it. I'm just concerned about your safety, Allison.
Allison Gottlieb: My safety?
Victor Sifuentes: Yes, your safety. You get dressed up like that. You tract attention, that's not safe.
Allison Gottlieb: Oh, please! You think I ask for it?

Victor Sifuentes: I am sick of tired of you and everybody else telling me what I think!
Allison Gottlieb: Then you say it, Victor! For once, you say what you think!
Victor Sifuentes: I have said it.
Allison Gottlieb: I got rape because there's something I said? I got rape because there's something I did? I got rape because there's something I wore?
[Allison finds something that she wear her clothes]
Allison Gottlieb: This is what I had on, Victor. Is this what this is?
Victor Sifuentes: [Allison nearly throws clothes at Victor] Shut up, Allison!
Allison Gottlieb: This is...
Victor Sifuentes: [Yelling in the tone of voice] What the hell are you want from me? If I can kill that son of a bitch, I would kill him! Okay?
Allison Gottlieb: That won't change anything.
Victor Sifuentes: But it'll make me feel a whole lot better!
Allison Gottlieb: Then why don't you do it, Victor? Why don't you wait until he gets out of jail? Hunt him down and kill him. But just don't act like it's for my benefit.
Victor Sifuentes: Right. I got it.
[Allison heads out the door and leave. Victor is going wait]


"L.A. Law: Pilot (#1.1)" (1986)
Victor Sifuentes: Sergeant, the little hand is on the nine. And the big hand is on the 12. I gotta be downtown like in 30 minutes.
Sgt. McKlosky: Soon as your client's through with breakfast. Meantime, why don't you let the officer pat you down?
Victor Sifuentes: What's the matter? You guys don't get enough at home?
Sgt. McKlosky: I'm getting tired of your mouth, Jose.
Victor Sifuentes: Whoa! Show me some respect. The name is Sifuentes, Victor Sifuentes!
Sgt. McKlosky: I don't care if you're freakin' name is Pancho freakin' Villa! You don't see your client without you get searched! Now assume the freakin' position!
Victor Sifuentes: You lay a hand on me, and I'm gonna kick your fat butt.
Sgt. McKlosky: That's it. You are outta here!
Victor Sifuentes: Let go my arm!
[In Spanish]
Victor Sifuentes: You swine! You son of a pooched out pig!

Victor Sifuentes: [Speaking Spanish] You're gonna be hearing more about this, McKlosky!
Sgt. McKlosky: I can't freakin' wait!
[Sifuentes leaves]


"L.A. Law: I'm in the Nude for Love (#3.8)" (1989)
Michael Kuzak: Sorry.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Well, well, welcome back, Brother Kuzak. Freshly returned from exile.
Michael Kuzak: Thank you, thank you.
[Leland is so happy to welcome Kuzak back to the firm]
Arnie Becker: Boy, did that month fly by...
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: I take it you're all ready to plunge into your defense the nudist colony.
Michael Kuzak: Yeah, I just came from there. We're ready for trial.
Victor Sifuentes: Ready for trial? Do I detect a little unauthorized practice of law at home here?
Michael Kuzak: Certainly not. My suspension ended on Friday and I prepared over the weekend.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Well, in the interest of the firm and a client, I wish you good luck, but as a purely personal observation. I wouldn't want those perverts prancing around my neighborhood either.
Arnie Becker: Check out the centerfold of this month's Flamingo, Mike. It's your star witness.
Michael Kuzak: Yeah, thanks, but... I've already seen the evidence.

Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Moving along, Malay vs. Century Partners Limited.
Stuart Markowitz: That's actually, uh, Abby's case. I'm doing a little tax work on it for her.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Abby Perkins is hiring McKenzie, Brackman to work for her?
Stuart Markowitz: That is correct, Douglas.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Am I assuming we're to be compensated for these services?
Stuart Markowitz: Also correct, you're assuming that.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Ben Ray, Jamie Ferguson?
Victor Sifuentes: Doctor takes the stand today.
Ann Kelsey: How's it going, Victor?
Victor Sifuentes: It's rough, Ann. Real rough.
Michael Kuzak: This is the girl in the coma, right?
Victor Sifuentes: Mm-hmm.
Stuart Markowitz: Forgive me, but I can't see forcing anybody to stay alive like that.
Ann Kelsey: Euthanasia's illegal, Stuart. You can't just kill somebody because...
Arnie Becker: Even her parents want her to die.
Victor Sifuentes: So where do we draw the line? First we stop killing coma patients, and then what? Babies with down syndrome? Retarded people?
Jonathan Rollins: Come on, Victor, the woman's practically brain-dead. If your own parents wanna pull the plug, who are you to say no?
Leland McKenzie: Now we are representing the hospital. This is the firm's client, not just Victor's. Which means to the extent that this draws any questions from the press directed anyone of you, you recite the company line, your personal feelings aside. On-the-record, we stand committed to keeping Jamie Ferguson alive. On-the-record, the taking of a human life is wrong. That is the client's position therefore it is our position. Are we understood?
Arnie Becker: Yeah.
[Dorothy listen quietly]
Leland McKenzie: Good. Move along, Douglas.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: That's it. We're adjourned.
[They are all dismissed with the Conference meeting]


"L.A. Law: Captain Hurt (#4.2)" (1989)
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Since we can assume that Michael's loss to us for the duration of this trial. Victor, would you make sure that is more drab less newsworthy cases don't require immediate attention?
Victor Sifuentes: Will do.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Ah, Benny, very good. Just set it down right here.
[Benny bought fresh fruit]
Ann Kelsey: Good god! Where the togas?
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: People, you can't eat too much fresh fruit. I want the content to cleanse the gastrointestinal tract. Zero cholesterol. These are things, we need to pay attention to try though, we might to ignore them. In fact, I have instructed Benny to put fruit in all our offices.
Leland McKenzie: Thank you, Douglas. Can we move on with the meeting?
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Ah, Hammond vs. Hammond. Arnold?
Arnie Becker: Yeah. Hotshot architect walks out on wife and child, I should be able to carve out a major counsel fee. Whatever midsection.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: You're here, having just seen the quarterly reports, whether we were all doing likewise.
Leland McKenzie: Yes, uh, Stuart, you might fill us in a few, these horrible tales.
Stuart Markowitz: Yeah, uh, have grossed income is down 11%, malpractice premiums are up again. And, uh, is this balloon payment due next month and the office renovations
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: We're sluggish and bloated. We need to be lean and mean. On that, we're adjourned.
[Douglas eating a fresh strawberry]


"L.A. Law: Bound for Glory (#4.16)" (1990)
[the first day of a new incoming Senior Partner as the first woman to be in charge in the law offices meeting is Rosalind Shays since she was elected last week]
Stuart Markowitz: Ann.
Rosalind Shays: Douglas, I think everybody's here. Why don't you get started?
[And every people seated. Douglas bring his coffee and opened his time on his pocket watch, beginning the meeting of today in the morning]
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Okay. People vs. Lassen.
Abby Perkins: Joel Lassen's been busted for possession again. Arraignments tomorrow.
Rosalind Shays: Why are we in this?
Arnie Becker: Because he's Abe Lassen's son.
Rosalind Shays: Say no more.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Breecher vs Wynn.
Jonathan Rollins: That's mine. Our client packages county fairs. The main event of one of them is a frog-jumping contest. There was prize money involved, and one enterprising entrant, got himself something called an African Goliath frog.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: An African Goliath frog.
Jonathan Rollins: Yeah. It was ruled ineligible hence the suit.
Rosalind Shays: I understand that there's appeal in things novel and strange. I also understand that as an attorneys, we need to amuse ourselves. But quite frankly, what I can't countenance are the sort of indulgences that hurt us.
Victor Sifuentes: How does this hurt us?
Rosalind Shays: It costs us. It makes us look foolish. What I'm saying, Jonathan, is that I think you're to have to be more selective of the kinds of cases he take on.
Leland McKenzie: Actually, he didn't take on the case, Rosalind. I did.


"L.A. Law: Prince Kuzak in a Can (#1.13)" (1987)
Victor Sifuentes: Andrew about your legal fees... I may have a way for you to work them off. Are you really that good with telephones?
Andrew Putnam: Am I good? Come here, watch this.
[Andrew and Victor walk over to a payphone in the courthouse hallway where Andrew picks it up and dials a three-number area code, then attaches a device to the speaker and begins pushing several buttons on the device in sequence]
Victor Sifuentes: What are you doing?
Andrew Putnam: This is to get by all the security checks.
[Andrew finishes pushing the buttons as he takes the device off the phone as a ringing sound is heard over the receiver and the phone is picked up by an unseen man on the other line]
Man: [voice] Oval Office. Can I help you?
Andrew Putnam: [into the phone] Yes, is President Regan in?
[Victor angrily snatches the phone away from Andrew and hangs it up. Andrew smiles]


"L.A. Law: Since I Fell for You (#5.22)" (1991)
Judge Whitney Baldwin: I can certainly understand any insurance companies unwillingness to fund experimental radical treatment. Especially where proven medical options are available. But when there is only one option and the doctors are recommending that option, how can you even consider denying coverage based on the exclusionary language in the fine print of a contract?
Bill Castroverde: Your Honor, the option you're talking about hasn't been approved by the FDA itself.
Judge Whitney Baldwin: I don't give a damn about the FDA. They're not even doctors. The FDA is a government agency. People die waiting for government agencies to take action. He paid you a premium. You promise to cover him if he got sick. No matter what disease he got sick with. That's the spirit of this contract. Mr. Cashman, I am holding you to it.
[Judge Baldwin make the ruling and favor the plaintiff Mark Gilliam]
Judge Whitney Baldwin: Judgment for Plaintiff. That's all.
[Congratulations to Mark Gilliam and he won helped from his friend Victor Sifuentes. Richard Cashman has to pay damages and Bill Castroverde is in shock]
Mark Gilliam: Wow. I never thought it could happen.
Victor Sifuentes: Me neither. Congratulations. He stuck it out and you won.
Mark Gilliam: Thank you, Victor. You really. Thanks.
[Mark was hugged by his friend comfort by Victor]


"L.A. Law: Victor/Victorious (#3.9)" (1989)
[Allison is leaving, but she bumped into Victor Sifuentes]
Victor Sifuentes: Oh!
Allison Gottlieb: Oh! God, I'm sorry.
Victor Sifuentes: No, no. Excuse me, I was...
Allison Gottlieb: It's okay.
[Allison laughs. Allison meets Victor]
Victor Sifuentes: I'm Victor Sifuentes.
Allison Gottlieb: Allison Gottlieb. Nice to meet you.
Victor Sifuentes: [Victor sighs] Yeah, it is.
Allison Gottlieb: I got to go.
[Allison is leaving to the door exit, and Victor will find out]


"L.A. Law: To Live and Diet in L.A. (#3.7)" (1989)
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Moving along, has anyone heard from the long lost Mr. Kuzak?
Victor Sifuentes: I have.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: And? Is he pondering the error of his ways?
Victor Sifuentes: Yeah, I think so. He's planning to go fishing.
Arnie Becker: Life's a bitch, ain't it?
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Victor, where are we on Jacobs vs. Teller?
Victor Sifuentes: I'm deposing Mr. Teller this morning.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Jonathan, the deforest motion?
Jonathan Rollins: Still pending.
Leland McKenzie: Well... who's the judge on that one?
Jonathan Rollins: Steven Lang.
Leland McKenzie: Well, let me see. Let me call his clerk.
[Leland will telephone to Judge Lang's clerk]
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Ms. Wyler, how go to the McNally Interrogatories?
Dorothy Wyler: The responses have all been drafted and sent to the client for his review. I'm getting his notes this afternoon and the revisions will be ready for his signature tomorrow morning.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Very good. Very good!
Secretary: Ms. Kelsey, there's a collect call for you.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Excuse me?
Ann Kelsey: I'll take it.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Lastly, having been accused in past years of stinting on our Christmas festivities, I gladly bow to majority will and relinquish control of our annual party to our crock financial watchdog, Stuart Markowitz. Well, the final figures of our 1988 party are in. And his able hands, we soared passed our budget by a full 41%.
Stuart Markowitz: Excuse me, Douglas.
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: It was a joke.


"L.A. Law: Watts a Matter? (#4.18)" (1990)
Victor Sifuentes: [Back at the LA Law firm building in the evening, Victor went to see Rosalind at her office] Cynthia Brown just fired Jimmy Hoffs, you know anything about that?
Rosalind Shays: Yes. I advise her to discharge him. I also recommend...
Victor Sifuentes: Where the hell do you get off going to her?
Rosalind Shays: Don't you talk to me like that.
Victor Sifuentes: Jimmy Hoffs build this case. He did all the leg work on this case.
Rosalind Shays: Jimmy Hoffs was giving bad advise. And it's co counsel, it was my obligation to point that out to the client.
Victor Sifuentes: Co counsel? You blindsided him! You blindsided me!
Rosalind Shays: I came to you! You wouldn't listen!
Victor Sifuentes: Oh, it's crap. Look I don't know what the hell your game is, lady, but I'm gonna tell something point-blank Senior Partner or not. I don't trust you.
Rosalind Shays: I warned you once, don't talk to me like that!
Victor Sifuentes: When the hell you gonna do? Fire me? Go ahead!
Rosalind Shays: Don't think that I won't! You have something to say to me. You come into this office like a civilized human being and we will discuss it. But charge in here again, shouting at me, and I guarantee you all fire you!
[Victor is leaving the firm without Rosalind and the rest of the team. Nobody is going to stop Victor except Rosalind]


"L.A. Law: Steal It Again, Sam (#6.13)" (1992)
Victor Sifuentes: No, I... I can't think about anything else, but this case up. There's a client that you can't put off for any reason just...
[Grace Van Owen has arrived]
Grace Van Owen: What is this?
[Victor didn't know Grace is here. Grace got the subpoena]
Victor Sifuentes: We, uh, can finish up later. I want to, okay?
[the woman leave and closed the door]
Grace Van Owen: What are you doing, Victor?
Victor Sifuentes: My parents are suing the man that killed Charlie and I'm representing him.
Grace Van Owen: Your father isn't well enough to leave his house. Your mother...
Victor Sifuentes: Grace, they want this. And we need you as a witness.
Grace Van Owen: And this is how you tell me? The subpoena?
Victor Sifuentes: Well, look, you didn't return my phone calls.
[Grace paused]
Grace Van Owen: What exactly do you want me to testify to? I didn't see anything that's good...
Victor Sifuentes: You saw the accident. You saw how drunk William Boyd was when he's out of his truck.
Grace Van Owen: I can't prove that he was drunk.
[Grace clears her throat]
Grace Van Owen: He could have been in shock from the accident and that is the first thing his lawyer will say.
Victor Sifuentes: You have to prove anything, so you say how he weak the liquor on how he hardly stand up.
Grace Van Owen: You can't win this, Victor. They didn't charged Boyd with manslaughter because the D.A. didn't have enough evidence. He got 6 months because the D.A. wasn't even sure he could make felony DUI.
Victor Sifuentes: Boyd got off easy, okay? He was blind drunk driving. He was driving like a maniac when he killed Charlie, and the law... the law can get off a slap on the wrist.
Grace Van Owen: The juries isn't gonna care.
Victor Sifuentes: I want to pay for what he did.
Grace Van Owen: So, this is about revenge?
Victor Sifuentes: No. It's about justice.
Grace Van Owen: You're the last person to be objective here, Victor.
Victor Sifuentes: William Boyd is a killer. Now, he murdered Charlie just as he had picked up a gun and pointed to his head. But I have to put you up on the stand. That's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do whatever it takes. But I'll be damned... I'm not letting him get away with murder!
[Grace is leaving]
Victor Sifuentes: Grace?


"L.A. Law: One Rat, One Ranger (#4.5)" (1989)
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Dorian vs. Togetherness Dating Service.
Stuart Markowitz: Yeah, that's mine. What year is complete, we go to trial this afternoon.
Leland McKenzie: This case really can't be settled, Stuart?
Stuart Markowitz: No, the conscience, I wouldn't recommend it, Leland.
Leland McKenzie: Why not?
Stuart Markowitz: Because the gravamen of the plaintiff's case is such, that we're going beat her cold.
Jonathan Rollins: Could not still end up costing us more than a settlement?
Stuart Markowitz: Mm-mm. Not if I'm successful and my motions for cost this person's legal fees, plus, let's not forget. If resettle, there'll be more plaintiffs coming out of woodwork.
Arnie Becker: Gravamen?
Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Giant Sequoia Taurus Council vs. Giant Sequoia beverages.
Abby Perkins: That's mine, we're representing a small mineral water company that's being sued for using the name Giant Sequoia. They claim is the fraudulent misrepresentation where the water comes from.
Victor Sifuentes: Where does it come from?
Abby Perkins: I also got to know.