Hoss Cartwright
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Quotes for
Hoss Cartwright (Character)
from "Bonanza" (1959)

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"Bonanza: The Courtship (#2.16)" (1961)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I reckon the Ponderosa holds about as much claim on us as we do to her. It's more like a partnership. Like we're all sort of beholdin' to one another. What I mean to say is that Pa won't let us cut down a tree unless there's another tree growin' to take its place, or take a cup of water outta the lake if it makes the lake go down too much. The Ponderosa's got a mighty lot to give. Like Pa says, we ain't to take one ounce out of her that she can't grow back.

[first lines]
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Hoss, you know, I was just thinkin' about something. There's no reason why we both have to go see Josh Layton's widow.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Now listen, Little Joe. You're not about to saddle me with goin' to see some poor old widow woman all by myself.

Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Pa told you to keep an eye on me? What in the heck for?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: To keep you from gettin' chased all the way back to the Ponderosa by some hoppin' mad daddy with a shotgun in his hand... and from the look in your eye that's just about what's gonna happen.

[last lines]
Adam Cartwright: Pa, you think Joe and I enjoyed doin' it? There was no other way.
Ben Cartwright: Oh, I know you meant well. Maybe there was no other way. Hoss is the only one that can decide that.
[Hoss comes down the steps of the ranch house]
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Well, you fellas gonna sit here and mope all day or you gonna go out and go to work with me?

"Bonanza: The Gunmen (#1.19)" (1960)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Hey, he's got us mixed up with someone else!
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: I sure hope so.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Well, why else would they be shootin' at total innocent strangers if they didn't have us mixed up with somebody?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Well, this is Texas after all.

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: First of all, ma'am, there's just about to be a bunch of killin' out there in that street.
Lorna Doone Mayberry: There's always killin' in that street.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Well, yes'm, and that seems to me to be a terrible waste. I mean, there not bein' enough men to go around for all you ladies as it is.
Lorna Doone Mayberry: There ain't a woman livin' can keep men from fightin'.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Ma'am, I beg to differ with you. You see, sometimes womenfolk can sorta get around menfolk in little ways and I figure maybe if you ladies tried real hard, you might be able to get around these.
Lorna Doone Mayberry: You ain't as dumb as you look. What do you want me to do?

[last lines]
Big Jack Slade: Hey, how far is it to Kiowa Flats?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Just a couple of miles back down the road.
[the Slade Brothers ride past the Cartwrights]
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Y-you don't suppose that...?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I think so. Come on, let's get out of here.
[moments later, gunfire is heard from the direction the Slade Brothers rode]
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: You don't reckon...?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: I think so.

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: This whole dang town is teched.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Aw, c'mon. Whoever heard of a whole town being teched?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Feller told me one time they got a weed down here and they call it loco weed. When the horses and cows eat it they get wilder than all get out.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: So? People don't eat weeds.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yeah, but they eat beef, don't they? One of them critters gets all filled up on that there loco weed, it would kinda salt down the meat, don't it?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Yeah, that makes sense.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Sure it does.

"Bonanza: San Francisco (#1.28)" (1960)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: You sold our Pa? How much did you get for him?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Oh Hoss, who cares how much she got for him?

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Pa, how much did that little redheaded gal get for you?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: [laughs] I wouldn't tell him, Pa. If she did get enough, we might want to sell you back. If she didn't get enough, you wouldn't want to admit it, would you?
Ben Cartwright: Very funny.

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Hey Pa, how much did that gal get for you?
Ben Cartwright: You'll never know.

"Bonanza: Desert Justice (#1.23)" (1960)
[first lines]
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Can't you load it any faster, Joe?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Can't I load it any faster?

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: [to Charlie, seeing southern California for the first time and observes it is nothing but a barren desert] It sure ain't never gonna amount to much!

[last lines]
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: What does she mean by that?
Micah Bailey: She means if you'd be any smarter, you'd still be the second dumbest man in creation, and you're looking at the first.
Adam Cartwright: It's a toss up.
Micah Bailey: Charlie, get them out of my station before anything else happens.

"Bonanza: A Question of Strength (#5.6)" (1963)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Well - I hope she gets what she wants.
Mother Veronica: And I, Mr Cartwright, hope she gets what she's worthy of.

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Anything will taste good if you're hungry enough.

[last lines]
Mother Veronica: May God bless you, Hoss.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Thank you, Ma'am.
Mother Veronica: And now we must go on.

"Bonanza: Feet of Clay (#1.30)" (1960)
[first lines]
[Ben, Hoss and Charlie are attending a funeral]
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: It's a doggone shame, ain't it, Charlie.
Charlie: Yep, sure is. Doc said she had pneumonia. By the time he got there, wasn't much he could do 'cept call the sheriff.
Ben Cartwright: Well, didn't anyone know she was sick?
Charlie: [indicating young Billy] First they knew was him riding all the way in to fetch the doc by himself.

Ben Cartwright: Take your feet off the table!
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Do either of you know how we came to be so sweet tempered when we have a grouch for a Pa?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I don't know. He used to be a mite more mellower when he was younger.

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Pa, I've got these big hands and I can lift a hefer clear off the ground. I can lick any man I ever met. But I'd cut them both off if it made that little boy quit looking at me like he wanted to spit. Why don't God help me, Pa? Why don't He tell me what to say? Why do I have to be a... a big dumb Hoss?

"Bonanza: The Infernal Machine (#2.29)" (1961)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: [after brawl] Pete's alright. He went through that wall head first.

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: A man's gotta take care of his partners.
Ben Cartwright: HOSS!

"Bonanza: The Newcomers (#1.3)" (1959)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I reckon that's the way it is sometimes, you... you look at a cactus and you see a rose cause, cause a rose is what you want to see. I don't reckon there's anything wrong when you see something good and pretty. Sometimes I even do that myself. I get sorta lonely-like and I look for good and pretty things.

Emily Pennington: You keep away from him, you ugly brute!
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Ma'am, I can't help being ugly, can I?

"Bonanza: A House Divided (#1.18)" (1960)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I just don't understand it. We're all from the same country here, and yet there's still all this talk about North and South. Where's the dividing line?
Frederick Kyle: I would say the dividing line was in people's minds.

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Pa, that newspaper you was reading the other day in the saloon about what Mr. Lincoln said about a house divided can't stand. I reckon he was talkin' about folks like us.
Ben Cartwright: No, not us, Hoss. Not us!

"Bonanza: Death on Sun Mountain (#1.2)" (1959)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: [to Joe] C'mon Little Joe, she's not for you. Stuff your eyes back in your head, they're about to pop out.

Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Hoss, I'd have myself a good time if you weren't here.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yeah. Get yourself in a peck of trouble too.

"Bonanza: The Many Faces of Gideon Flinch (#3.7)" (1961)
Burt: Ah, I always keep to my own affairs, but old Jeb, he's sorta been bit by the curiousity bug. He's wondering what brought you fellows to town.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Well, I reckon I can tell you two fellows.
Burt: Yeah!
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: You see them two horses down there? They brought us.

Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: You know Hoss, the idea of sitting in that old office all day kinda makes my stomach flutter, you know?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yeah. I know what makes your stomach flutter. I seen her too...

"Bonanza: Twilight Town (#5.4)" (1963)
Ben Cartwright: Going somewhere?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Isn't everybody?

Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Sounds sort of weird.
Adam Cartwright: All legends sound weird or a little funny - depends how you look at them.

"Bonanza: The Last Hunt (#1.15)" (1959)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Hey, I can't eat cattle fodder!
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: You eat beef steak, don't ya?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Well yeah, but what's that got to do with anything?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: It just shows what cattle goes through for ya.

Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers.They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers. They're going to be able to find us, though, if we're west of Kansas City. All they gotta do is follow their smellers.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I reckon you're referring to my cookin'.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: I'm referring to that stink you're making. What is it?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Them's wild roots and mesquite beans.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Mesquite beans?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yep.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: That's cattle fodder!
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yep. It's gonna be your dinner, Little Joe.

"Bonanza: Denver McKee (#2.6)" (1960)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: You know what I think?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Couldn't be much - it takes brains to think.

Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Ya see anything?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Not a thing. I think we're wasting our time.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Well, we're young, brother. We've got plenty of time.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yeah, maybe, but as slow as it went last night, I feel like I'm ninety years old already.

"Bonanza: The Phillip Diedesheimer Story (#1.8)" (1959)
Andrew Holloway: Gil dead? Well, I'll have to hire another superintendent.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Mr. Holloway, if that's the first thing you thought about, I feel real sorry for you.

"Bonanza: The Magnificent Adah (#1.10)" (1959)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Was she or wasn't she?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Was she or wasn't she what?
Adam Cartwright: You know...
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: No, I don't know. Ask Adam.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Adam, was she or wasn't she?
Adam Cartwright: Was she or wasn't she what?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Naked.
Adam Cartwright: Well now, you got eyes. You saw her.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yeah but, exactly what did we see really?
Adam Cartwright: She was wearing tights.

"Bonanza: The Friendship (#3.8)" (1961)
[last lines of episode 3.8]
Ben Cartwright: There go two wealthy young men.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: What do you mean, Pa?
Ben Cartwright: Well, they have something all the money in the world can't buy. It's called friendship.

"Bonanza: Mr. Henry Comstock (#1.9)" (1959)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Don't cut unless you plant.
Ben Cartwright: That's right, Hoss. That's why we're here. Not just to take from the land, but to give.

"Bonanza: Hoss and the Leprechauns (#5.12)" (1963)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Folks, I know that none of you would purposely or mean to hurt anybody's feelings, but Timothy here, and the others, feel like they ain't welcome here. They think you're makin' fun of 'em cause you don't want 'em around. Now, of course, you've noticed that they're different from you - they're a whole lot littler. Well, it's a funny thing... See, I notice the same thing about you.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Now, these fellers are here for the same reason most of us are - that's to help settle our town, make it grow, raise their families. They're planning on buildin' their homes here, workin' their crops, bein' good neighbors. Now, in the past, we've always welcomed folks like that and I don't see no reason we should treat these fellers any different.

"Bonanza: The Thunderhead Swindle (#2.30)" (1961)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Whatever it was, I didn't do it.
Sheriff Roy Coffee: You sure do look guilty to me.

"Bonanza: The Abduction (#2.8)" (1960)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Don't worry, Pa. I'll lkeep an eye on her.
Adam Cartwright: Sure, but who's gonna keep an eye on him?
Ben Cartwright: That's easy, um... Hoss will. Isn't that right, hoss?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Huh? I mean... Sir?

"Bonanza: A Rose for Lotta (#1.1)" (1959)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: [to Hop Sing] Hop Sing, you know you can't do that. Why if you left here, I'd waste away to a shadow. You know that

"Bonanza: The Outcast (#1.17)" (1960)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Listen Adam, Little Joe had a real good idea. Here's what we're gonna do. He's gonna put on a beard, see. Then we're gonna get in the covered wagon and come out here like we're lookin' for land.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Yeah, see, then we put him in a real nice bonnet and a print dress.
Adam Cartwright: Mm-hm. How did I ever get tangled up with you two?

"Bonanza: The Julia Bulette Story (#1.6)" (1959)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: You know, that kid's got lots of grit. One of these days, he's gonna be able to whup that Frenchman.
Adam Cartwright: Yeah... but this wasn't the day.

"Bonanza: Dark Star (#1.31)" (1960)
[first lines]
[a wolf howls in the distance]
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Well, I don't see any sign of tracks.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: No, not a sign.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Look, why don't we split up and meet up by that rimrock.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: All right. Be mighty careful, Little Joe. If we get that old timber wolf all boxed in, he ain't gonna be at all sociable.

"Bonanza: Enter Mark Twain (#1.5)" (1959)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: [to Sam Clemens] I don't know about that name Mark Twain. It seem to me like that I've heard a lot better names than that before. You sure that's a fittin' name for a writer?

"Bonanza: Bank Run (#2.19)" (1961)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Joe, what are you doing?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Robbing the bank. Come on, where in this together.

"Bonanza: The Blood Line (#2.15)" (1960)
Ben Cartwright: [referring to Todd] You can't keep him behind bars. He's not a criminal! He's a 16-year-old kid!
Sheriff Roy Coffee: With a 16-year-old gun. Ben, do you realize if that kid was just a split second faster, you wouldn't be around anymore to watch either one of them grow any older?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: He's right, Pa. A sidewinder is just as poisonous the day he's hatched as when he's full-grown.
Ben Cartwright: Well, we're not talking about sidewinders, we're talking about a boy. Besides, the fangs of this one have already been pulled.
[Ben drops Todd's gun on Roy's desk]
Sheriff Roy Coffee: And I aim to see that he don't grow another set.

"Bonanza: The Rescue (#2.23)" (1961)
Adam Cartwright: Horse throw ya?
Ben Cartwright: No.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Did ya bump into a limb or something, Pa?
Ben Cartwright: No.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Forget to duck?
Adam Cartwright: They what was it?
Ben Cartwright: I got into a little scuffle.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: A little scuffle? With who?
Ben Cartwright: Forget it.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Forget it? Why?
Ben Cartwright: Because if I told you who it was, you'd all run out of here hot-headed and itchy and looking for trouble; and you'd find trouble and there would be some gun play and somebody would get hurt.

"Bonanza: Little Man... Ten Feet Tall (#4.34)" (1963)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Every man's got to fight his own battle in his own way.

"Bonanza: Breed of Violence (#2.9)" (1960)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: ...Ran into Kincaid.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Oh? Was that... uh... on purpose or... accident?
Adam Cartwright: Mmm... It was a little bit of both. You know, I really feel sorry for Dolly Kincaid.
Adam Cartwright: Sorry? She never had any trouble... Uh... trying to find somebody to chase after her.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: No, I think it's the other way around. I think she never had any trouble finding somebody to chase.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Well, what are you worried about, little brother? You ain't never had any trouble outrunning her.

"Bonanza: Escape to Ponderosa (#1.25)" (1960)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: I knew you were good for something, brother. But I never figured it'd be making houses out of cards.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I've only got three more cards left. I'm gonna make it this time for sure.

"Bonanza: The Saga of Annie O'Toole (#1.7)" (1959)
Annie O'Toole: Cooking hotcakes, I was, this morning. On me mother's stove. Himself was a great one for hotcakes. He strangled and died.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: On the hotcakes, Ma'am?
Annie O'Toole: Do you question my cooking? The hotcakes, he says... 'Twas the air that choked him, just as he said it would. 'Annie,' he says to me. 'One whiff of that heathen air and I'll die!' He said it and he did it.

"Bonanza: The Tax Collector (#2.22)" (1961)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Well Hoss, are you gonna tell us or not? Who cut your lip for you?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I done told ya, I ran into a broom.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Mm... I just wondered who threw it. Oh, and that uh... that little scratch you got there on your cheek.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Cut myself shaving, and that's the truth.
Ben Cartwright: Look, Hoss, if you did have a fight...
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Pa, it wasn't no fight... But if you sak me, there's one member of this family looking for a fight right now.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: I'm sorry. I'm just worrying about you, that's all.

"Bonanza: The Bride (#2.18)" (1961)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: You uh... found any new breeding stock this trip, Pa?
Ben Cartwright: Breeding stock?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Mm-hmm.
Ben Cartwright: I went to Carson to see the railway people about selling some timber for that new line they're planning up north. You know that.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Uh, Pa, you didn't meet nobody new or nothing?
Adam Cartwright: Well, let's stop beating around the bush. Did you get married?
Ben Cartwright: Did I what?

"Bonanza: The Actress (#4.22)" (1963)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I ain't never done a fight without my hat.

"Bonanza: The Fear Merchants (#1.20)" (1960)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Little Joe?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Hmm?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Is it sure enough true that we're goin' to have birds' nests for dinner at Jimmy Chang's birthday party?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: That's what Adam told us.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: I ain't so sure I'm goin' to like that.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Well, if it's something to eat, you'll like it all right.

"Bonanza: The Savage (#2.12)" (1960)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: [Hoss starts inside where his father is yelling. Little Joe is sitting in a rocking chair on the porch, his head covered with his hat] I wouldn't.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: [Lifts hat off Joe's face] What do you mean, 'I wouldn't'?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Right now, this is Yorktown, Bunker Hill, and Valley Forge all rolled into one.

"Bonanza: El Toro Grande (#1.16)" (1960)
Ben Cartwright: Well, Adam, you thought these boys would have a lot of trouble bringing that bull up here, huh?
Adam Cartwright: I guess I was wrong, Pa.
[Turns to his brothers]
Adam Cartwright: You sure you didn't have any trouble?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Not a bit.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Well, a little bit. Like... uh... wh-when Big Red almost got cut up into steaks by those Indians.
Adam Cartwright: Indians?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yeah, but that never would've happened except Little Joe was busy fighting a duel.
Adam Cartwright: Duel?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Otherwise, I would have had to get married.
Adam Cartwright: Married?
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Yeah, but th-that was right after Hoss fought the bear.
Adam Cartwright: Bear?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Ah, that wasn't nothing. You ought to have seen how Little Joe gunned down them two bushwhackers that tried to steal our $15,000.00.
Adam Cartwright: Now, just a minute. Who you trying to kid?
Ben Cartwright: [Looking at the bull] It's certainly a lot of bull.
Adam Cartwright: [Looks at his father, then walks away from his brothers] Yes sir, it sure is.

"Bonanza: The Avenger (#1.26)" (1960)
[last lines]
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: [referring to Lassiter] He's a driven man, Pa. I would sure hate to be him.
Ben Cartwright: Yeah. There's somebody I'd like to be even less - any one of the men he's looking for.

"Bonanza: Joe Cartwright, Detective (#8.25)" (1967)
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: What's the use. Trying to broaden your mind and all you're thinking about is broadening your middle.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Look, Little Joe... you broaden what you want to broaden, I'll broaden what I want to broaden, all right?

"Bonanza: A Passion for Justice (#5.2)" (1963)
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Folks around here judge a man by what he is, not what he was.

"Bonanza: The Last Viking (#2.10)" (1960)
[last lines]
Ben Cartwright: Come on. He wouldn't want us to mourn over him.
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: No. No, I reckon he wouldn't at that. He just wasn't that sort of man, was he.

"Bonanza: The Burma Rarity (#3.5)" (1961)
Ben Cartwright: [to Hoss] Now, just one long minute! And you look at me when I talk to you! I know that half the people of Virginia City are trying to get me married off to Widow Hawkins. Now, maybe I have to take their smirks and innuendos, but I don't have to take it from my own family, you hear?
Eric 'Hoss' Cartwright: Yes sir.
Joseph 'Little Joe' Cartwright: Yes sir.
Ben Cartwright: Yes sir! You coming along, Adam?
Adam Cartwright: I'm with you every step of the way, Pa... right down the aisle.
[Hoss and Joe crack up laughing, but stop when Ben turns and glares at them]