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Quotes for
Max Headroom (Character)
from "Max Headroom" (1987)

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"Max Headroom: Rakers (#1.2)" (1987)
Max Headroom: Hi. I'm doing a survey on this kind of mindless violence and its effect on the mind-mind-mind-mindless. Do you believe all that killing is necessary? Does it s-s-s-scare you?
Raker: Me?
Max Headroom: Yes! Yes! You with that plank on whee-whee-whee-whee-wheels. What is its effect-t-t-t on you?
Raker: You can see me?
Max Headroom: Well. That was a fas-fas-fascinating discussion and I think you've answered my question. Thank you-you-you-you, thank you... for your help.

Murray: All right, talk to me, somebody... wake me up!
Max Headroom: Murray? Murrrrayyy...
Murray: Somebody except Max.

Max Headroom: Murray... I don't want to keep - I don't want to keep - I don't want to keep chewing on an old bone, but...
Announcer: Missile Mike!
Max Headroom: ...I'm talking about lives! Just how da-da-da-da-dangerous is this person?
Murray: Does anybody know what he's talking about?
Max Headroom: I'm talking about this guy-guy-g-g-*guy* with the inexhaustible ammunition-tion-tion-tion ammunition supply, ninety-nine lives and an urge to use 'em all up!
[Missile Mike battle footage]
Max Headroom: *That-That-That-That's* who I'm talking about!

Max Headroom: Murray. Murrrrayyy... *Murray*! Forget about that mad bomber jazz and listen up! There's a guy with a gun running amok-mok-mok in a crowd here every afternoon!
Murray: I'm sorry to disappoint you, uh, Max, but that's, uh, Missile Mike. It's one of our children's shows.
Max Headroom: You're kidding. Kids like ki-ki-ki-killing? Who *told* them about it!
Murray: I'm never going to get used to this. Just because he lives in a TV, he thinks everything is TV!

Max Headroom: This is Max Headroom, live on Net-Net-Net-Network 23, because what I want to know is, who's gonna stop this kind of wholesale killing-ing-ing-ing. Killing. It's time the network took a stand - a stand - a *stand* on this kind of murder. Murder. Murder. Preferably against it.

Max Headroom: I sense a prob-prob-prob-problem here! Why the long face? Hmm? Hmm?
Theora Jones: I think I lost my brother.
Max Headroom: Have you ch-ch-ch-checked your pockets?
Theora Jones: Max, it's not funny.
Max Headroom: Sorry.
[Max inhales]
Max Headroom: Sorry.
[Max inhales, Max inhales]

Max Headroom: Hey! *psst!* You look - you look - you look - you look like the man in charge. I'm looking for a new game - som-som-som-som-something with action, excitement, and *taste*... *taste*... the taste... of blood. Any ideas?

Max Headroom: [exuberant] And-And-And I'm going to be back with you - on Network 23 after these real-real-real-really exciting messages. So-So sit back and watch - I just can't *wait-wait-w-wait* to see them!
[pause]
Max Headroom: [deadpan aside] Wake me up when they're finished, willya?

[last lines]
Max Headroom: Hi... this is M-M-M-Max Headroom on Network 23, and if you thought raking was a vicious game, let me tell you - there are sponsors who'd give both-oth arms to get their hands on that sport! But... in a lighter vein, here are some really sporting off-off-offers on sale now from Network 23. Yes: music! Mu-Mu-Music! Sit back and tap your feet to the best Russian pop music with this really up to the minute Rus-ss-ssian album, "20 Great Funeral Marches"! Also... also-also-al-al-also an offer: Learn Chinese. Yes! A complete set of hour-long Teach Yourself Chinese tapes - one payment down and we will send you one tape per month, or, or, pay in full now and you get the entire easy-to-follow course immediately... plus! Tape number 527 absolutely free! Did you know that, in Chinese, there are often more than thirty-thirty-thirty different ways of saying one simple little word? And is that why their population is so big? Chinese men just don't know when to take No - ha-ha - No for an answer! Ha-ha.


Max Headroom (1985) (TV)
Max: And then there's politicians. It's easy to tell when a politician is lying: their lips move.


"Max Headroom: War (#1.5)" (1987)
Max Headroom: Hi! This is Max-Max Headroom on Network 23, brought-brought-brought to you by...
[pauses, and then continues are a montage of vintage car clips continue behind him]
Max Headroom: Oh, NO, no no-no-no-no! I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but if they think I'm endorsing car accessories, they've got another dipstick-stick coming. No-No, they've tried this one before and I'm radial tired of it! If they expect me to change gear now and start spark-spark-spark plugging their products, they must be out of their pist-pist-piston heads! Listen, I don't like to blow my own gasket, but I have better things to do than just sit here and wax polish lyrical about car parts! Car parts! I've got letters from fan belts who say, "Max, you're special! You're unique! You're differential!" Yes, yes I know it's what they want, that's because they're air conditioned to it - to it. Oh - to it. Oh, I've fendered it off time and timing belt again. I mean, who's calling the tune-tune-tune up? Who's in cru-cru-cru-cru-cruise control here, anyway? I'll tell ya who! Me! Me! Max Headlamp! And if they don't like it, they can stick-stick-stick shift it in their exhaust pipes and choke-choke it! AND smoke it!


Pixels (2015)
Max Headroom: Well, well, well! Look who's here, Q-Bert the traitor and his cheating friends! Come to beg for a second chance? You're in luck! The boss wants to me-me-meet ya in person! So come on up. If you defeat him, you save your planet and destroy our warriors. But if you lose... Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Hahahaha!