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Quotes for
Death (Character)
from The Seventh Seal (1957)

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Undercover Blues (1993)
Jeff Blue: [answering phone] Y-ello.
Muerte: This is Blue?
Jeff Blue: Speaking...
Muerte: Do you remember me?
Jeff Blue: Well, you have a really sexy voice. But hey, I'm a happily married man.
Muerte: Well, you'll be a dead man soon.
Jeff Blue: [laughing] Who is this again?
Muerte: This is Muerte.
Jeff Blue: Morty!
Muerte: No! No Morty! MUERTE! "DEATH"!
Jeff Blue: Yeah right, death...
Muerte: That's right. I'm gonna come for you man. I'm gonna come for you, and I'm gonna kill you, okay and...
Jeff Blue: Hey hey hey Morty, Morty, Morty, it's late. What's the bottom line here?
Muerte: The bottom line? The bottom line is you're gonna die man... Ugly, okay?
Jeff Blue: Look Morty, do me a favor, okay? Don't call here any more unless you want to have, like, a serious conversation, alright?
[hangs up on him]

Muerte: My name... is MUERTE!
Jeff: Nice to meet you Morty, my name is Jeff.

Muerte: My name is Muerte, my name is death!

Muerte: My name is MORTY!

Paulina Novacek: Take his gag off.
Muerte: My name is Morty!
Jeff Blue: Muerte.
Muerte: I kill you.
Paulina Novacek: Enough! Somebody find out who this man is and then kill him!

Jeff Blue: Oh, hi, Morty.
Muerte: Muerte. MUERTE! For death! You die today!
Jeff Blue: Right.
[Muerte begins to make some very elaborate moves while holding a knife]
Jeff Blue: You know that looks really great on TV, but in real life you get better results if you just kind of hold it like this and...
Muerte: Shut up! SHUT UP!
Jeff Blue: Do you always have this much problem with a little constructive criticism?

Jane Blue: [Muerte has been disarmed and Jeff has his arm in a hold when Jane approaches them, carrying shopping bags] Now what?
Jeff Blue: Oh, hi, hon. You remember, I told you about Morty. Morty, this is Jane.
[pushes Muerte towards Jane]
Jane Blue: Oh, hi, Morty, look it's nice to meet you, but we've just got so much shopping to do...
Muerte: [pulls another switchblade from his boot and points it at her] Shut up! Shut up! You die too!
Jane Blue: Oh for God's sakes...

Jane Blue: [while Meurte is floating on a life saver in the ocean] Can I get you anything? Coffee? Tea?
Muerte: [considers the offer] No, no, I'm fine, thank you.

Jeff Blue: [while Muerte is in a tree in an aligator pit wearing only his shirt and socks] Tell you what, you wait here. I'll go for help.
Muerte: No, no, Blue, don't leave me!
Jeff Blue: Can I get you anything, Morty? Coffee? Tea?
Muerte: Coffee? Tea? No, no, I'm fine. Just get me the hell out of here!
Jeff Blue: Ta-ta.
Muerte: Ta-ta! Good-bye! Thank you!

Jeff Blue: [last lines - on the boat] Which way is Cuba?
Muerte: [in the water] No, no, that's the wrong way! Please, come back! No, the land is back there behind you! Where are you going? Blue, no!

Paulina Novacek: So, Mr. Muerte...
Muerte: Excuse me please, no "Mister," is "Muerte."

Bar Patron: Hey Muerte, you lookin' pretty banged up.
Muerte: Yeah? Well you should see the other guys! 50 guys, with chains, and dogs, you should see what they look like!
Bar Patron: That ain't what I heard at all. I heard it was one guy, with a cute little tiny baby! Ha Ha Ha!
[bar patrons laugh with him]
Bar Patron: Which one was it who did this to you, Muerte? Was it the guy, or that cute little tiny baby! Ha Ha Ha!
Muerte: [grabs the patron by the back of the head and smashes it down on the bar, breaking his beer glass on his face]
Bar Patron: Aaaahhhhhh! Owwwwwwww!
[screaming in pain]
Muerte: My name is Muerte! My name is Death!
[gets up and starts to storm out of the bar, then turns around]
Muerte: Don't you forget that! Scumhooks!

Jane Blue: [Jane, disguised as the bag lady sits next to Muerte at the bar] I know you!
Muerte: Everybody know me! I am Muerte!
Jane Blue: You're the guy that got stomped, by that guy and the baby! Heh Heh!
Muerte: Hey! Don't provoke me! OK?
Jane Blue: You wanna get back at him? I know someone who will pay big!
Muerte: You don't know nada.
Jane Blue: OK! I don't know *nada*. But this guy, said *Muerte*, he's the guy for the job!
[starts to get up]
Muerte: Wait!
[grabs Jane by the arm forcing her to sit back down]
Muerte: Who told you this?
Jane Blue: You gotta buy me a drink first.
Muerte: What would you like?

Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (1991)
Grim Reaper: Don't overlook *my* butt, I work out all the time. And reaping burns a lot of calories.

Grim Reaper: I believe Colonel Mustard did it in the study with the candlestick.
Dead Bill: Sorry, Death, you lose! It was Professor Plum!
Grim Reaper: I said Plum!
Dead Ted: No way! You said Mustard! Can we go back now?
Grim Reaper: Uh, best three out of five!
Dead Ted: I don't believe this guy!

Grim Reaper: [to The Smoker] See you real soon.

Grim Reaper: A hit. You have sank my battleship!
Dead Bill, Dead Ted: Excellent! Yeah!
Dead Ted: I totally knew he put it in the J's, dude!
Dead Bill: Good thinking, Ted.
Grim Reaper: You must play me again.
Dead Bill: WHAT?
Grim Reaper: Um, best two out of three.
Dead Ted: No way!
Grim Reaper: Yes way.

Grim Reaper: [rapping] You might be a king or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later you dance with the reaper.
[Twirls Scythe over his head and ducks so blade doesn't hit it]
Grim Reaper: Heh heh! Get down with your bad self!

Dead Bill: Best of seven?
Grim Reaper: DAMN RIGHT!

Dead Bill: Ted?
Dead Ted: What?
Dead Bill: Don't "Fear the Reaper"!
[both of them do an air guitar]
Grim Reaper: I heard that.

Grim Reaper: [to God] They Melvined me.

Grim Reaper: You have sunk my battleship.

The Seventh Seal (1957)
Antonius Block: Nothing escapes you!
Death: Nothing escapes me. No one escapes me.

Antonius Block: Who are you?
Death: I am Death.
Antonius Block: Have you come for me?
Death: I have long walked by your side.
Antonius Block: So I have noticed.
Death: Are you ready?
Antonius Block: My body is ready, but I am not.

Death: Don't you ever stop asking?
Antonius Block: No. I never stop.
Death: But you're not getting an answer.

[Death approaches Antonius Block]
Antonius Block: Wait a moment.
Death: You all say that. But I grant no reprieves.

[Antonius Block lets Death choose which chess pieces to play]
Antonius Block: You drew black.
Death: Appropriate, don't you think?

[Jonas Skat is in a tree which Death is cutting down]
Jonas Skat: Hey, you scurvy knave, what are you doing with my tree? You might at least answer. Who are you?
Death: I'm felling your tree. Your time is up.
Jonas Skat: You can't. I haven't time.
Death: So you haven't time?
Jonas Skat: No. My performance...
Death: Cancelled... because of Death.

Antonius Block: I want knowledge! Not faith, not assumptions, but knowledge. I want God to stretch out His hand, uncover His face and speak to me.
Death: But He remains silent.
Antonius Block: I call out to Him in the darkness. But it's as if no one was there.
Death: Perhaps there isn't anyone.
Antonius Block: Then life is a preposterous horror. No man can live faced with Death, knowing everything's nothingness.
Death: Most people think neither of death nor nothingness.
Antonius Block: But one day you stand at the edge of life and face darkness.
Death: That day.
Antonius Block: I understand what you mean.

Death: Ingenting undgår mig. Ingen undgår mig.

Death: When next we meet, the hour will strike for you and your friends.
Antonius Block: And will you reveal your secrets?
Death: I have no secrets.
Antonius Block: So do you know nothing?
Death: I am unknowing.

"Supernatural: Two Minutes to Midnight (#5.21)" (2010)
Death: This is one little planet in one tiny solar system in a galaxy that's barely out of its diapers. I'm old, Dean. Very old. So I invite you to contemplate how insignificant I find you.

Dean Winchester: I gotta ask, how old are you?
Death: As old as God. Maybe older. Neither of us can remember anymore. Life, death, chicken, egg - regardless, at the end, I'll reap Him too.
Dean Winchester: God? You'll reap God?
Death: Oh, yes. God will die too, Dean.
Dean Winchester: ...This is way above my pay grade.
Death: Just a bit.

Dean Winchester: What about Chicago?
Death: I suppose it can stay. I like the pizza.

Death: ...Life, death; chicken, egg... Regardless of the end, I'll reap him, too.
Dean Winchester: God? You'll reap God?
Death: Oh, yes. God will die too, Dean.

Death: Sit down. It took you long enough to find me. I've been wanting to talk to you.
Dean Winchester: [Fearful, cautious] I gotta say... mixed feelings about that. So, is this the part where...
[Clears his throat]
Dean Winchester: where you kill me?
[He tries to smile bravely]
Death: [Gives Dean a long look as Dean's smiles disappears. Very measured and calm] You have an inflated sense of your importance. To a thing like me, a thing like you, well... Think how you'd feel if a bacteria sat at your table and started to get snarky. This is one little planet in one tiny solar system in a galaxy that's barely out of its diapers. I'm old, Dean. Very old. So, I invite you to contemplate how insignificant I find you.

Death: [Serves Dean a slice of pizza] Eat.
[Very slowly, afraid it might be poisoned... or worse, Dean takes a bite]
Death: Good. Isn't it?
[Dean looks at him, then down as his eyebrows briefly go up in surprise because, yes, it is good]

Dean Winchester: So, why am I still breathing? Sitting here with you... what do you want?
Death: [He shows the first spark of emotion] The leash around my neck, off! Lucifer has me bound to him. Some unseemly little spell. He has me where he wants, when he wants. That's why I couldn't go to you. I had to wait for you to catch up. He's made me his weapon. Hurricanes. Floods. Raising the dead. I'm more powerful than you can process, and I'm enslaved to a bratty child having a tantrum.
Dean Winchester: And you think... *I* can unbind you?
Death: There's your ridiculous bravado again. Of course, you can't. But, you can help take the bullets out of Lucifer's gun.
[Holds up his hand with his ring]
Death: I understand you want this.
Dean Winchester: Yeah.
Death: I'm inclined to give it to you.
Dean Winchester: To give it to me.
Death: That's what I said.
Dean Winchester: What about... Chicago?
Death: [pauses as lightning strikes outside] I suppose it can stay. I like the pizza.
[He takes off the ring]
Death: There are conditions.
Dean Winchester: Okay. Like?
Death: You have to do whatever it takes to put Lucifer in his cell.
Dean Winchester: Of course.
Death: *Whatever* it takes.
Dean Winchester: That's the plan.
Death: No. No plan. Not yet. Your brother? He's the one that can stop Lucifer. The *only* one.
Dean Winchester: What, you think...
Death: I know. So I need a promise. You're going to let your brother jump right into that fiery pit.
[He extends the ring to Dean as Dean's face hardens]
Death: Well, do I have your word?
Dean Winchester: [pauses, looking at the ring] Okay, yeah. Yes.
[He holds out his hand]
Death: [Forcefully] That better be yes, Dean. You know you can't cheat Death.
[He drops the ring into Dean's hand]

"Family Guy: Death Is a Bitch (#2.6)" (2000)
Death: I'm Calista Flockhart. Who do you think I am? I'm death.

Meg Griffin: [Death eats an entire piece of chicken in one bite] Wow. How did you do that?
Death: Well lets just say I did some films when I was younger that I'm not really proud of.

Death: [car is shown rocking with Death and girl having sex inside] Oh yes. Oh yes!
Girl: Oh oh oh oh yes...
[girl dies due to Death touching her]
Death: Oh man! Not again! I'm going to be a virgin for ever... or am I?
[car starts rocking again]

Death: Wait, don't tell anyone I'm here. For if humanity discovers that I am no longer lurking in the shadows, the consequences will be dire.
Peter Griffin: Go on...
Death: That's it, what the hell do you see in him?

Death: You can't tell anyone that I'm here. For if you do, the consequences could be dire.
Peter Griffin: Go on...
Death: That's it.
[to Lois]
Death: God, what do you see in him?

Meg Griffin: You could kill all the girls who are prettier than me.
Death: Well that would just leave England.

Too Tired to Die (1998)
Death: He said that you stopped him for no reason.
Kenji: No reason? No, I saw him in my dreams. And you... Who are you?
Death: I... I am...
Young Arab: Chukhram.
Death: He also wants to thank you.
Kenji: Thank me? For what?
Death: He's been running all his life. He must have been tired. We must go.
Kenji: Wait wait wait. I don't get it, okay?
Death: [smirking] How do you want me to disappear?
Kenji: What?
Death: Never mind. I'll see you.
[gives Kenji a kiss on the cheek]

White Soldier: You okay, madame?
Death: Me?
White Soldier: Something bothering you?
Death: You know why I like young people?
White Soldier: Because they're young?
Death: Because it's such a challenge. There's such a strong will to resist me. I mean some of them pretend I don't even exist for them. So I wait patiently for time to pass. Usually they give in and embrace me.
White Soldier: Unless there's a war or a plague or something.
Death: Exactly. Still I feel heartbroken taking away the young ones. I mean, they make such beautiful plans for their lives you know? They're always asking me, who gets to decide who stays longer and who has to go, but... that's not my business.
White Soldier: Wow... touching. You're not the heartless bitch I thought you were.

Kenji: [is awoken by Death] No...
Death: Yes.
Kenji: So this is it. You're here finally for me now.
Death: You know who I am? You're not afraid of me?
Kenji: Can you come back a little later? I need some more sleep.

Death: I came here to tell you that I've got to pick you up tonight.
Kenji: Tonight...
Death: Nine p.m. sharp.

Death: Don't even think of trying to escape me, that is a game you will never win. So just enjoy it while you can. I didn't have to do this. I mean I could have just have come tonight to pick you up, nine pm, and you would have been really sorry for yourself because you wouldn't be able to do anything. By telling you now it's as though I've given you 12 free hours. So go out and live a little. Do whatever you've always wanted to do, because it's not gonna come back.
[kisses Kenji on the lips]
Death: I'll see you tonight.

"Married with Children: Take My Wife, Please (#8.7)" (1993)
[the hooded Grim Reaper materialized before Al]
Al Bundy: How'd you do that?
The Grim Reaper: I'm Death. That's the first thing they teach you in Death School. Got to have a gimmick.
[Al puts his hand on the hooded figure, and it goes right through the non-corporeal Grim Reaper]
Al Bundy: Hey, you are Death!
The Grim Reaper: OOOOOH, you found my G-spot.

[the Grim Reaper reveals itself as Peggy]
The Grim Reaper: This? I though that might get you. Actually, I can look any way I want. I can be your greatest fantasy. I can be your worst nightmare. I could be my worst nightmare. But who'd want to go around looking like Sally Struthers?

The Grim Reaper: Any time between now and midnight, if any member of your family says that they need you in any way, I'll let you live.
Al Bundy: All my family has to do is say that they need me?
The Grim Reaper: That's right.
Al Bundy: Just once?
The Grim Reaper: Just once.
Al Bundy: Oh... in that case, I'll go back my suitcase.

Al Bundy: Suppose my family lets me down. Do you have any idea where I might be going after I die?
The Grim Reaper: Well, you might want to bring along a lot of sunblock lotion. SPF: one million.
Al Bundy: What?
The Grim Reaper: I'm just kidding. Maybe...

Al Bundy: Oh, please! Please don't take me! I didn't mean it when I wished I was dead. Well, maybe I wished I was dead once or twice... or maybe a hundred times, but I didn't mean it. It's like you don't mean something when you say it like "I love you" or "I wish I was dead". Why don't you take someone that really deserves to die like Michael Bolton, or that guy who wrote the Facts of Life theme song?
The Grim Reaper: I knew it! Another wimp chickening out in the face of eternal darkness. I didn't have this kind of problem with Elvis.
Al Bundy: Elvis? Elvis Presley? So, it's true? Elvis really is...
The Grim Reaper: Oh, please! Of course Elvis is dead. Did you know it took six men to get him out of there? He was so big that they had to take the bathroom door off it's hinges. As they were carring him out on a strecher they kept sliping on Ding-Dongs and Ho-Ho's all the way out, adding to the big mess all over the bathroom floor. You wouldn't lick the back of one of his postage stamps if you saw what I saw.

"The Color of Magic" (2008)
Death: Don't mind me. I've got a book to read.

Death: I was at a party, you know.

Trymon: I hope it's a good party!
Death: I think it might go downhill at midnight.
Trymon: Why?
Death: That's when they think I'll be taking my mask off.

Death: Your lifetime is up, Rincewind. I can't hang around all day.
Rincewind: I can. What have you done with the tourist?
Death: Nothing. He was lured by the attraction of the Wyrmberg.
Rincewind: So at least the Patrician won't be sending out his men to kill me just yet then?
Death: There is a distinct possibility that he may not need to.
Rincewind: What are you grinning at?
Death: Oh, I'm sorry. I can't help it. Now, would you be so kind as to let go? It won't hurt.
Rincewind: Being torn to pieces by wolves won't hurt?
Death: It would be over very quickly. And of course, they are an endangered species.

Death: I think I've just had another Near Rincewind Experience.

"Supernatural: Appointment in Samarra (#6.11)" (2010)
[Death has proposed building a "wall" in Sam's mind to protect him from memories of being in hell]
Dean Winchester: Okay, a wall. Sounds good.
Tessa: But it's not permanent.
Death: She's right. Nothing lasts forever. Well, I do.

Dean Winchester: What's the bet?
Death: Don't roll your eyes, Dean. It's impolite. Now when you fetch my ring, put it on.
Dean Winchester: What?
Death: I want you to be me for one day.
Dean Winchester: Are you serious?
Death: No, I'm being incredibly sarcastic.

Dean Winchester: What's with you and the cheap food?
Death: I could ask you the same thing.

Death: This is hard for you, Dean. You throw away your life because you've come to assume that it'll bounce right back into your lap. The human soul is not a rubber ball. It's vulnerable, impermanent, but stronger than you know... and more valuable than you can imagine.

Last Action Hero (1993)
Death: I don't do fiction. Not my field.

Death: [looking down at a wounded Jack Slater] I was only curious, he's not on any of my lists.
Death: [turns to Danny] but *you* are... Daniel.
Danny Madigan: Now?
Death: No, you die a grandfather...

Death: [to Danny] You're very brave. But also not very bright. If I were you, I'd be looking for the other half of the ticket.

"The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy: Meet the Reaper/Evil Con Carne/Skeletons in the Water Closet (#1.1)" (2001)
Grim: [about taking Billy's hamster to the underworld] Look, I'm just doing my job... but I'm afraid it's curtains for Mr. Snuggles...
Billy: You got a curtain?

Billy: [meeting the Grim Reaper] It's Santa! Santa Claus!
Mandy: That's not Santa Claus, you stooge! That's the Grim Reaper...
Billy: [pause] Do I still get presents?
Grim: Um... No... Actually, I'm here for the hamster...
Billy: Ooooh! You brought presents for Mr. Snuggles?
Grim: No... I'm taking him away.
Billy: To the North Pole?

Billy: Look! It's Santa! Santa Claus!
Mandy: That's not Santa, you stooge. That's the Grim Reaper.
Billy: ...Do I still get presents?
Grim: Um... no... actually, I'm here for the hamster.
Billy: Oh boy, oh boy! You brought presents for Mr. Snuggles?
Grim: No... I'm taking him away.
Billy: To the North Pole?
Grim: No. I'm... ''
[Mr. Snuggles bites Grim]
Grim: '' Ah! Oof! Oof! Look, I'm just doing me job, but I'm afraid its curtains for Mr. Snuggles.
Billy: ...You got him curtains?
Mandy: You'll have to forgive Billy - he's an idiot.

Six-String Samurai (1998)
Death: Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me!

Buddy: Who are you?
Death: Death,
Buddy: Cool!

Death: You have failed me for the last... nice shoes!

The Meaning of Life (1983)
Grim Reaper: Englishmen, you're all so fucking pompous. None of you have got any balls.

Grim Reaper: Shut up, you American. You Americans, all you do is talk, and talk, and say "let me tell you something" and "I just wanna say." Well, you're dead now, so shut up.

Grim Reaper: You are all dead. I am Death.
Host: Well, that's cast rather a gloom over the evening, hasn't it?

"Soul Music" (1997)
Death: I need to imbibe vast ammounts of alcohol.

Death: I shall leave your room exactly as you left it...
Susan Sto Helit: Thank you.
Death: ...- a *mess*!

Death: Oh... bugger!

"Family Guy: Death Lives (#3.6)" (2001)
Death's Mother: Death, put on your jacket or you'll get frostbite!
Death: I don't have skin!
Death's Mother: That's 'cause you didn't eat your beans!

Death: This is why I hate shopping for clothes. I have no ass. I am minus an ass.

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night (1997) (VG)
Death: Ah, Alucard... what is your business here?
Alucard: I've come to put an end to this.
Death: Still befriending mortals. I'll not ask you to return to our side, but I demand you cease your attack!
Alucard: I will not!
Death: You shall regret those words. We'll meet again!

Death: I will feast on your soul this night!

"The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy: Billy and Mandy Save Christmas (#5.7)" (2005)
Grim: How come every time I take you kids to the mall it burns to the ground?
Billy: I blame the economy.

Mandy: Grim, everyone knows that Santa is an invention designed by the big five corporations to sell tinsel and video games to an unsuspecting public.
Grim: The whole "childhood wonder" stage just blew right past you, didn't it?

The Book of Life (2014)
Manolo: I know about the wager. Xibalba cheated!
La Muerte: He did what?
Manolo: Yeah! With a two-headed snake!
[La Muerte starts to boil with rage]
Candle Maker: [to Manolo, Carmen and Luis] You might wanna cover your ears right now.
La Muerte: [yelling with rage as her candles brightens the Land of the Forgotten] XIIIII... BAAAAL... BAAAAAAAA!

La Muerte: The world keeps spinning, and the tales keep turning, and people come and people go, but they're never forgotten. And the one truth we know, it held true one more time... That love, true love, the really, really good kind of love never dies.

"Kings: The Sabbath Queen (#1.8)" (2009)
King Silas Benjamin: You - you make the music that drives me mad.
Death: A gift; others meet me in silence. Out of deference to those who love you, I give warning.
King Silas Benjamin: You came for her; you cannot have her.
Death: Can't I?
King Silas Benjamin: I was chosen by Him who made you and all things; leave us - you and your music.
Death: You can't threaten me; He made death even outside his reach.
King Silas Benjamin: You like to see us suffer.
Death: It *is* beautiful to see - yours most of all. I come to you sometimes, Silas; I look at you.
King Silas Benjamin: Then make me suffer more. Give me pain - endless, endless pain; name the knife.
Death: For this life... I would see you lose what you love more - your crown.
King Silas Benjamin: It's yours.
Death: Not for me.
King Silas Benjamin: Who, then? Anyone.
Death: Not anyone; to the better man. When he's found, when he comes, you stand aside.
King Silas Benjamin: Yes.
Death: Willingly, freely; you support his succession - else I come for you, and you live to see your name be cursed, forgotten.
King Silas Benjamin: Yes.
Death: Swear it, before all.
King Silas Benjamin: Evermore.
Death: Seal the contract.
[she tears the last pages from the book Silas has been reading to Michelle; he smashes the mirror and marks the pages with his bloody hand]
Death: You'll wish I'd taken her; you'll beg to change now.

"Family Guy: Friends of Peter G. (#9.10)" (2011)
Death: You members of the human race have the power to send a man to the moon and make Justin Long a movie star. With that kind of willpower, don't you think you can learn how to put the bottle down, just sometimes?
Peter Griffin: We did it with Justin Long, didn't we? America said no but we kept at it!

"Supernatural: Meet the New Boss (#7.1)" (2011)
Death: Nice pickle chips, by the way.

Discworld II: Mortality Bytes! (1996) (VG)
Rincewind: If I promise you that I'll find a way of making you popular, will you come back?
Death: People will like me, you promise?
Rincewind: Cross my heart and hope to meet you in your professional capacity.

"Red Dwarf: Gunmen of the Apocalypse (#6.3)" (1993)
Death: We're gonna cut you up so small the worms won't even have to chew.
Rimmer: You can't frighten me, I'm a coward, I'm always scared!

Because I Could Not Stop for Death (2014)
[repeated line]
Death: Balls!

"The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes: Everything Is Wonderful (#1.10)" (2010)
M.O.D.O.C.: We can remake you, Simon Williams, into something powerful enough to defeat even Iron Man.
Simon Williams: Something? This is insane. Are you saying I won't be human anymore?
M.O.D.O.C.: Human? Why would you want to be human?
Grim Reaper: M.O.D.O.C.
M.O.D.O.C.: Yes, humanity is relative. You will retain everything that makes you Simon Williams. The Zeta Beam will imbue your living matter with ionic energy. You will become a wonder of science. The power at your disposal will be incalculable.
Simon Williams: I don't have a choice. Tony Stark has taken everything I care about. I have to take it back.
M.O.D.O.C.: I agree. Drones, prep him.

Only Human (2009/III)
Death: Sooner or later everything dies, and is eventually forgotten.
Antonio: That's what I'm trying to change.

Conker: Live and Reloaded (2005) (VG)
Gregg the Grim Reaper: It's better than that pissing baseball bat, that's for sure!

De Düva: The Dove (1968)
Death: [shaking fist at dove, after having been splattered with dove droppings; in parody Swedish] Duva shmucka!

The Importance of Playing Yardball (2007)
Death: Kid, you've got to lighten up and have a sense of humor! You know you haven't smiled once since you died? I mean, I brought you out here to cheer you up!
[camera zooms out to reveal they are leaning against a child's playground]
Big Brother: [defeated] You are such a dick, and you are the worst person for this job.

"Supernatural: I Think I'm Gonna Like It Here (#9.1)" (2013)
Death: I must admit when I heard it was you, well... I had to come myself.
Sam Winchester: I bet you get off on this.
Death: Perhaps. But not in the way you assume. I consider it quite the honor to be collecting the likes of Sam Winchester. I try so hard not to pass judgment at times like this. Not my bag, you see, but you.
[with respect]
Death: Well played, my boy.

Monkeybone (2001)
Death: [sitting at the controls of a tower monster] I do like to dress up when I come down town. So, how was she?
[meaning Julie]
Stu Miley: [standing on the monster's right hand] She was... she was beautiful. Of course I was decomposing at the time but... at least now she knows how much I love her.
Monkeybone: [looking nervous] Uh, excuse me, Death... I hate to break up this little love test, but my little bladder is about to burst.
[Death pulls a lever, and the hand Monkeybone is on swings over Stu]
Monkeybone: [screams] BUT I'VE *REALLY* GOTTA GO!
[the hand covers Stu, then rises off him revealing Monkeybone has disappeared]
Stu Miley: [feeling his head] Where, where's Monkeybone?
Death: Back in your head where he belongs. I don't wanna hurt your feelings Stu, but on your own you're a tad vinilla, so I didn't want to send you back without him.
Stu Miley: [surprised] You're wha... did you? You're sending my *back*?
Death: [sure] Yes. I'm sending you back.
Stu Miley: Thank you. Death...
Death: I like you. I'll take the South Park guys instead I hear they're dying to meet me.
Death: Come on Stu. Turn round.
Stu Miley: [turns around] Like this?
Death: Yeah, uh-huh.
[looks up]
Death: Stu, little higher.
[Stu steps higher up the palm, and the other hand comes up behind him]
Death: See ya!
[the finger springs off the the thumb, sending Stu back]

"The Color of Magic: Part 2: The Light Fantastic (#1.2)" (????)
Death: I think I've just had a near Rincewind experience.