Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore
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Quotes for
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore (Character)
from Beezy Bear (1955)

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Grand Canyonscope (1954)
Ranger Woodlore: Spread out a little, folks. This is CinemaScope

Ranger Woodlore: [describing the Grand Canyon] And mind you, at this point, it's a mile deep.
Donald Duck: [looking down into the canyon; voice echoing] A mile deep?
[Donald takes a rock and drops it toward the bottom, but Ranger Woodlore catches on quickly and catches the rock with a net]
Ranger Woodlore: [to Donald] Ah-ah-ah, no throwing of rocks into the canyon. If we all threw rocks into the canyon, pretty soon, we wouldn't have a canyon, would we?

Donald Duck: [Looking for his burro, sees a tail sticking out of a cave] Ah, she's hiding.
Ranger Woodlore: Now, now, let me handle this.
[Pulls on tail; out comes an old mountain lion]
Ranger Woodlore: All right, come on, now. Straighten up there. Most unbecoming a burro. Why, you're getting to look a little shaggy, like an old lion. A lion? That's impossible.
[Looks through a guide book]
Ranger Woodlore: The last lion seen in the canyon was during the Civil War. So that couldn't be you. Or could it?
[Lion puts on a Confederate cap; Ranger whistles Dixie and salutes; the lion roars and Ranger runs]
Ranger Woodlore: It's a lion!
Donald Duck: Where?
[Takes a picture as lion nearly eats him]
Donald Duck: Wow!

Ranger Woodlore: I should have stayed in the postal service.

Ranger Woodlore: Well, I hope your satisfied. You two have, in a matter of minutes, messed up what it took Mother Nature millions of years to create. The National Park Rule Book states, and I quote, "When a natural object is marred or defaced, it must be restored to its original state." So, start digging!


Beezy Bear (1955)
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: [seeing Humphrey wet] Hmm, why are you always wet?
[Humphrey feverishly dries himself off]
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: You bathe too much.
Donald Duck: Yeah, how 'bout that?

Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: [to the bears about Donald] Someone has been trying to steal his honey.
Bears: Awwww.
Donald Duck: And it was a bear!
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: Ah-ah-ah, you *think* it was a bear.


Grin and Bear It (1954)
[Ranger J. Audobon Woodlore summons Humphrey and the other bears of Brownstone to his ranger station]
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: Now, the guests are here. Yes, they're here. Yes, indeed.
[the bears cheer and applaud]
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: Now, there's been lots of advertising and there's a tourist for each and every one of you.
[the bears cheer again; then the ranger takes on a much sterner tone]
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: Oh, yes, last year, we've have one complaint of stealing.
Bears: [glaring at Humphrey] Shame.
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: We won't mention any names, will we?
[he looks at Humphrey, who smiles sheepishly]
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: But if it happens this year, your supreme penalty.
[he points to a bear rug; the bears all cringe at it]
Ranger J. Audubon Woodlore: I expect you to mix with the atmosphere and mix with the tourists, that's a must. Okay, mix it up, boys, mix it up.
[the bears all go out to greet the different tourists]